Category: Weird

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Weird Events People Absolutely Can’t Explain

Weird things happen every day.

That said, about 99% of those events can, with enough consideration and time and space, be explained by logic and common sense.

The 1% of the time they can’t are where the fears of the paranormal, of roaming ghosts, of invisible hands, and other things that go bump in the night live – and these 14 people with some seriously strange stories.

14. Well that sounds terrible.

I had a sleep paralysis nightmare when I was a kid, where I saw a red-eyed dark figure standing in the doorway. It’s always stuck with me, and I’ve called him the boogeyman ever since.

One day I was browsing Reddit and somebody painted a picture of their “sleep paralysis demon”. It was like the guy had painted my exact dream. And then a bunch of people commented that they had seen the same creature.

It always makes me uneasy to think about.

13. That’s definitely unique.

When I was younger, in elementary school, I used to have the same dream every weekend starting on Saturday (when I would go to sleep) and then waking up in the middle of the night (on Sunday) and throwing up.

The dream was always a bunch of numbers. Not even anything happening just a bunch of random jumbled up numbers all over the place. I never understood why that happened where the same dream would happen on the same night every week and I would throw up every single time.

I always think about it and wonder what it was or if it was just some weird coincidence. Also I would not have any signs of being sick before or after. Maybe someone else has experienced this???

12. Out of the blue.

Both of my lungs collapsed at the same time (almost over 50% collapsed) and I was walking around like I was perfectly normal. Until I decided to go to the ER for bubble sounds in my chest. None of the doctors could figure out why this had happened to me. They didn’t know how I was just up and walking around and laughing

1. I am a 5’7” thin woman. I have heard it is very common in tall and thin men. 2. Yes, it was bilateral pneumothorax, Dr. just couldn’t figure why it happened. 3. I ended up having four more spontaneous pneumothorax within the span of two years. I am still a mystery in that hospital 4. I was aged 19-21 when this was happening. 26 years old now. 5.

They did pleurodesis procedure to get it to stop happening.

Hasn’t happened since.

11. A past life.

I have a vivid memory of being at the Statue of Liberty as a child, on my dad’s shoulders, seeing the skyline of NYC. I remember what we ate for lunch that day, etc. I remember the ferry we took. I’ve always thought about this memory and talked about it, but my family denies I ever went to NYC.

I didn’t go for the first time until I was 23, but strangely enough, when I went, I remembered everything just how it had been when I was there with my dad.

10. Like it was nothing.

When I was in college, a drunk dude fell from a 3rd floor balcony and got up and walked away like it was nothing.

Seriously one of the weirdest/freakish things I’ve ever seen in my life.

9. Maybe it was the cat?

 in my teenage years I lived in a townhome owned by my then-stepdad who freely admitted he thought the place was haunted. He was self employed as a sound equipment installer and often would come and go during the day & my mom worked 9-5 at a law firm. It was summer break, but I wasn’t driving yet. I spent a lot of time outside and this was before the time everyone had a cell phone, so I’d often take our cordless home phone outside with me. I went outside one day, and realized I’d forgotten the phone. When I tried to go back inside to get it, the door was locked. Not the handle – which I may have written off as something I accidentally did on my way out – the deadbolt. The handle freely turned but the deadbolt was engaged. The deadbolt that requires a key to lock from the outside, which I did not have.

I stood there dumbfounded for a few minutes. Nobody else was home, & the only other entrance to the house was a set of sliding doors in the basement that were always locked. What the fuck just happened. I kept trying to open it like an idiot for a while before finally resigning myself to borrowing the neighbors phone & calling my stepdad. He was in town & after asking me if i was sure 1,000 times, came by to unlock the door. I’ll never forget him saying “yep, the deadbolt was completely thrown. I can’t explain that.” I spent the rest of the afternoon inside, trying to recreate the situation. I slammed the door shut so many times in an attempt to get the deadbolt to wobble and lock itself. But it never did, & honestly I didn’t expect it to.

8. Better safe than sorry.

On Reddit one night, I read that thread where the OP hallucinated weird stuff until a commenter suggested that he check for a carbon monoxide leak. The commenter probably saved his life. I went to bed thinking, “Oh yeah, I never did check whether my new house’s smoke alarms also detect carbon monoxide. I need to check that out in the morning.”

At maybe 6 AM, my wife and I awoke to our fire alarms screeching, with a recorded voice telling us carbon monoxide was detected. We grabbed the baby and the dog, piled into our car in the driveway, and called the fire department to check it out. After they tested, they told us no carbon monoxide was detected, but sometimes fire alarms behave unexpectedly when their batteries are low.

This was maybe 5 years after moving into a house that’s new construction, so yes, I was super delinquent in checking it. It wasn’t even the first time I’d read that story on Reddit. Anyway, there is absolutely a logical explanation: an improbable but possible coincidence. But that’s how I ended up spending huge piles of money on a bunch of Nest Protect units, so I could at least get a pleasant phone notification when my alarms’ batteries are low.

7. They didn’t believe her.

This afternoon I had about 30 minutes between class and practice and I drove home to get a snack. When I got there, my mom was at work & my stepdads van was gone so I assumed he was gone as well. The door was locked. Now when you walk into this home, right in front of you to the left is the kitchen, the right is my bedroom, & the middle has a staircase going downstairs. I unlocked the door, came inside, and turned into the kitchen with my back to the staircase. As I was making a sandwich, I heard someone downstairs. I turned back around & the staircase door was open, stairwell light was on, & someone was clearly downstairs.

At the time I thought “wasn’t that door closed when I got here?” but I also rationalized, because my stepdads van was a cargo van & it wasn’t uncommon for someone to borrow it to haul things. So I assumed he was home, his van was borrowed, & I went to the top of the stairs. I stood there, looking down the stairs, eating my sandwich & I almost said something. It was almost out of my mouth, but something stopped me. I still don’t know why I didn’t yell HI JAY down the stairs. Instead I turned around & left, and I left the door unlocked because he was home, right??

When I got back from practice my mom was mad at me because Jay said he came home around 5pm to an unlocked house. He had a lot of expensive equipment in the basement. I was always to lock the door. I tried telling her what I’d seen. He was home at 4. She said he wasn’t. I swore he was. Something was home. My brother believed me, but my mom never did.

6. Who was he?

My dad owned a small garden shop, so I’d stay behind the checkout after school till the shop closed. This was until I see a tall man wearing all black, like a trench coat, walking past my dad and smiling at me before going into a staff only area.

I jump up to stop him, even though I was 7. This back area filled with new shipments. I turn the corner but nobody is there. There was nowhere he could’ve gone.

I ask my dad to check the CCTV after closing, but it’s only shown me jumping up and running, and running out of frame. Weird stuff, never felt comfortable there again.

5. There was ice in her veins.

I lived in a shitty trailer in my early 20s when I was poor with 2 young kids. It had 2 bedrooms, which I’d given to the kids, & I slept on the couch in the living room which was in direct line of sight to the front door. I put the kids to bed around 9pm, and I always locked the door. Always. I still to this day clearly remember locking both the handle & deadbolt & checking to make sure it was fully locked before taking a shower. Eventually I fell asleep. I woke up suddenly around 3am on high alert. As my eyes cleared & I started thinking sensibly… I realized I was staring into the street. My front door was wide open. Not like oh it’s a little open or cracked or I didn’t quite close it all the way and a strong wind came along… it was fully open. Like 90 degree angle here. Plus I had a glass storm door that was fully closed and latched, blocking any wind we might have had, which we didn’t have anyways.

I got up & walked to the door to close it, and that’s when I lost my shit. Y’all. The deadbolt was still in the locked position. It was fully turned to lock, sticking out into the living room air for god and everyone to see. You ever have those moments where you swear there’s ice in your veins? That was it for me. I’ve never been scared like that in my life. In a closed door, you can’t even turn the deadbolt to “fully locked” without it being lined up in the door jamb properly. I knew I’d locked that door. And yet here it was, staring me in the face. I didn’t sleep without the lights on for a week.

4. The sound was so real.

One time when I was little I had a similar experience.

I had fallen asleep on the couch and woke up in the middle of the night, when I got up to go to the kitchen I saw a black silhouette of a woman with a bun and glasses and she went into the kitchen and I heard all of pans fall, i rush into the kitchen no one is there and everything is in its place.

I know I could’ve imagined the figure but I can not explain the sound of the crashing pans and no one else heard it they were all asleep.

3. It was the lady.

My girlfriend got out of the shower and called me into the bathroom to show me the mirror. There was a very strange, distinct handprint placed on the mirror.

I lived alone and she was the only adult that had been to my house in about two years. We each placed our handprints on the sides of the mystery handprint for reference and neither look anything like the mystery print. I still have no idea how it got there.

  • I’ve lived in this house for over a decade.
  • The mirror isn’t newly installed.
  • The mirror is cleaned pretty regularly.
  • I’ve taken many showers and fogged up the mirror and have never seen it.

Not the person I bought the house from but the previous owner, she died in this house.

I was watching my neighbor’s 5 year old kid a few years prior to this and she was eating at the kitchen table. She asked me “Who was that lady that just went up stairs?” There was no lady or any other person in the house.

2. Weirdness usually reserved for twins!

I turned to the other person in the room, who I barely knew, and said “My sister is getting engaged right now,” without having the intent of speaking at all.

He politely asked why I said that, and I had to shake my head and say “I don’t know.”

A few days later I found up that, sure enough, ah that exact moment on the far side of the world, she had said “yes” to Mr. Right.

I hadn’t even known she was dating.

1. He made it happen with his mind.

When I was in primary school (like year 1-2) ;in the cafeteria there was all these cups filled with milk every lunch. Red, green, blue BUT ..only one yellow cup. Everyone would fight to get the yellow cup like it was the holy grail and it had been this way for years.

One night I had a dream that the cafeteria had gotten more yellow cups in, and low and behold the next day…

Hundreds of yellow cups.

I do not like any of these, not even the innocuous ones. I like answers!

If you’ve got a story that would fit on this list, please tell it to us in the comments!

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Food Service Workers Discuss Orders You’re Gonna Have to See to Believe

If you’ve never worked in food service before, then you’ve never had the opportunity to be completely stunned by the food or drinks another human being with put into their body with relish.

Things that you think are objectively gross, turn out not to be. Things that should never be combined are smacked together and gobbled up, and things that should flat-out be illegal are some people’s favorite things.

And of course, you have to make it – regardless of how gross or how inconvenient, because even if the customer isn’t always right, it’s your job to pretend they are.

20. The way you learn your customers.

Everyone is weird in some way, right?

19. Did she not know?

Or was it some kind of game.

18. Hahaha she tricked him.

And he had regrets.

17. I wonder if she was pregnant.

It’s the only acceptable explanation.

16. I don’t even want to imagine what this looked like.

Nevermind the taste.

15. This is a woman who drank cement mixers in college.

On purpose.

14. Everyone has their kink.

I wonder if they should have called CPS.

13. When it’s so bad you have to take a picture.

Because you never want to forget it.

12. No matter what they think it is, they want it.

White runny stuff for everyone!

11. Were they preparing for the apocalypse?

What else could it be?

10. Maybe they had good dessert?

We all know orange soda can’t miss.

9. That’s an interesting choice.

Whyyyyy would someone do this?

8. Bless Kathy.

She wanted to share her perfectly prepared wings with friends.

7. This cannot be real.

Tell me this isn’t real.

6. Was it Rocky?

No, that was eggs.

5. Some things are not for blending.

Not that it ever stopped people from trying.

4. I wonder if he’s still alive.

Over/under?

3. They should probably concern all of us greatly.

But it’s really none of our business.

2. This woman is a legend.

I’ve only been brave enough to lick the spoon.

1. Why not just order tomatoes and dressing?

Is that not a thing?

There are some things I miss about waiting tables, but orders (and customers) like these definitely aren’t one of them!

If you work in food service and have a similar story, please share it with us in the comments!

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Weird Memes for Totally Weird People

We’ve got some weird memes in store for you, friends! The kind that will stick with you, like a good breakfast.

…if you ate memes for breakfast, I guess. Which, maybe you do. I don’t know your life.

Anyway, enjoy this strangeness.

15. Meet me in the middle

It looks like it was lit and I’d like to check it out.

14. Look at it!

Every time I do it makes me laugh.

13. The real thing

Would you like to set Introspect Exploder as your default browser?

12. Nice and long

When he failed to delete his browser history before passing.

11. Poetry in motion

Do I need to spell it all out for you?

10. All dogs go to Heaven

Ok, we’re stopping the game here, it can’t get any better than this.

9. You heard the man

How can he stay mad at that face?

8. Bird is the word

And the word is a lie.

7. Honk honk, buddy

You came to the wrong neighborhood if you’re not gonna make with the bread.

6. Squawk box 360

They crave. They scream. They on your team.

5. Make a move

I’ll catch you sooner or later.

4. Eat ’em up

Yup, that’s an anteater. No snout about it.

3. Lyin’ Lucas

Why? What did he tell you? Is he startin’ up drama again?

2. Hot tips

And just like that, I lost my appetite forever.

1. Parting words

Thanks for scrolling!

Have a good day, ya weirdo!

What’s your favorite flavor of meme?

Tell us in the comments.

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Hilariously Bad Facebook Takes You Gotta Check Out

There sure are some bad takes out there in Facebook land. It’s almost like there’s a challenge on the books for who can be the wrongest about the simplest thing.

Because seriously, it doesn’t matter the subject, it doesn’t matter how simple, someone somewhere will have an awful take on it.

Check out the bad Facebook takes on these subjects:

10. America

It’s not a stereotype, we really seriously don’t understand that the world is bigger than our own country.

9. Keith Urban

Probably trolling. Hopefully trolling. Oh God, please be trolling.

8. Cellphones and prayer

Bless me Father, for I have sinned quite a bit.

7. Plutonium

Now that is some radioactive levels of dumb.

6. Math

I love it when the dumb is mixed in with a hearty dose of arrogant.

5. School

Losing your household’s livelihood to own the libs.

4. Books

Well, we’ve come full circle folks.

3. Evolutionary history

To be clear: the idea is that the asteroid kicked up so much dust that it temporarily changed the planet’s atmosphere, killing off the bigger reptiles and allowing for small mammals to thrive.
Those small mammals eventually gave rise to us. Read a book.

2. US…history…

I genuinely don’t know where to begin with this so. Enjoy?

1. The Earth itself

I’m sure I don’t need to say this, but there’s no “up” or “down” in space.
The earth doesn’t have a “lowest point.”

And there you have it. Now go forth, back to your own social media, and just…try not to be this dumb.

What’s the worst take you’ve seen recently?

Tell us in the comments.

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Strange and Funny Facebook Posts That Defy Description

Oh, Facebook. What would we do if you weren’t around?

Live our lives peacefully and unseeking of the randomly administered micro-dopamine hit that comes with the tiny bits of social validation administered through your platform throughout the day? No thanks!

People love Facebook. Even if they have literally no idea what they’re saying on there. Just look!

11. Very rare

I um…I hope you like salmonella.

10. Double trouble

This is such a wild ride and you never see the ending coming.

9. What a vision!

In case this needs saying: never ever ever ever ever look directly at the sun.
It is a giant nuclear bomb in the sky and it will damage your eyes real good.

8. Order of operations

Read this three or four times and you still won’t get it.

7. For what?

Man, when it rains, it pours.

6. Doggy dog

But that sounds like the kind of world I WANT to live in.

5. Good boi

When people look at the instructions but clearly don’t read them.

4. Growing up

I think that baby is gonna be literally quite the opposite of mature, actually.

3. Crunch the numbers

Bad math aside, if you’re saying “it’s the principle” while squabbling over pocket change, you get talked about behind your back, I promise.

2. Half baked

I understand wanting to get these images as a new parent, but why on EARTH would you share them? They look like little alien lava monsters.

1. Time and time again

That’s still a lot of work but presumably you take two days off then?

Man Facebook is crazy. I feel like it’s melting my brain. Anyway, back to Facebook.

What’s the wildest post you’ve seen recently?

Tell us in the comments.

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Former Flat-Earthers Discuss What Made Them Realize They Were Wrong

I’ve been fascinated by conspiracy theory subcultures since back when they were…not electing our government officials.

And it’s troubling, watching people hold firmly to beliefs that don’t stand up to even the barest scrutiny, and stand in defiance of literally every scrap of available evidence.

So, what do we do? Is there a way out? That’s what Reddit user jbarms wanted to know.

Former Flat Earthers. What made you come round? from AskReddit

As many pointed out, jbarms should probably have used the “serious” tag, as the thread was overrun by hundreds of terrible jokes.

But sprinkled in among them were a few real stories of people who’d changed their minds, or worked to change the minds of others.

Let’s have a look.

1. “That’s how big the earth is.”

I convinced a flat earther, temporarily, by asking him if it was possible for a sphere to be so large that you could not tell it was a sphere my simply being on the surface of it.

It took him a while, I used an analogy of a extremely long line that was so slightly curved you could not tell so by looking at a small section of it.

Eventually he said yes to the sphere and I told him that was how big the earth is.

A few days later he reverted, most of these people aren’t mentally stable, they believe in a lot of conspiracies.

– McClain3000

2. “None of this would work at all.”

I talked to a flat-earther about my job working for a company that tracks ship locations, routes, and speeds by satellite. We also had ways of monitoring carbon emissions based on fuel consumption and known weather conditions. None of this would work at all if the earth was flat. Not a jot of it.

I could only explain the most basic concepts, but it was enough for him to understand and realize that I was right and that he’d been convinced by someone who had no practical experience of the spherical nature of the Earth. I think that’s what really did it – my experience was really tangible. This happens then this happens then we measure this etc etc… no theory, just practice. A bit like showing a child a rock dropping to the ground in order to explain gravity, rather than giving them the whole theoretical shebang. Y’know?

– Administrative-Task9

3. “Why?”

A serious answer here

The thing that made me stop was just the question “why would nasa lie to you”

– The_Holy_Fork

4. “They mostly make me sad.”

I spent about a year infiltrating the flat Earth community on Instagram. I garnered a decent following with an account dedicated to flat earth travel photos (an intentionally absurd premise).

In that time I learned a quite a bit about the community including how to discern the trolls from the real deal. The majority of legit flat earthers are extremely distrustful of anything the government says or does. These same people are 9/11 truthers, Holocaust deniers, and anti-vaxxers and they connect these conspiracies together. Many of them have also attached flat Earth theory to religion, magic, or mysticism.

Before my infiltration I’d always considered conspiracies fun. Like they were the fan fiction of real life. Now they mostly make me sad. For all the phony accounts like mine, there are still plenty of people out there willing to drop a couple of hundred dollars on a flat Earth convention.

– Zelph_Onandagus

5. “Time away to detox.”

Not a flat earther. But I was a 9-11 “truther” I guess you could say–insofar as I thought it was an inside job. I was heavily influenced and believed in multiple conspiracies in the Zeitgeist film as well. There was a never ending source of dark, shadowy “they’s and them’s” controlling everything behind the scenes.

I think there were a few factors that helped me escape that:

• Losing my father. It was such a life changing event at that age that it made me reconsider everything in my life.

• Some light training in evaluating information. I learned about how to vet sources, primary, whether something was actually news or just an opinion/editorial, etc.. Ironically, this education came before I was duped. After my dad died, suddenly this started to kick in more.

• Lack of time/means to dig myself a deeper hole. I started college shortly after my father passed and that + a full time job took up all my time. I had none to buy further into the newest crazy bullsh*t. I had no Facebook/Twitter/IG/etc.. No smart phone or texting. My primary use of Reddit once I discovered it was for r/Naruto, r/Bleach, rage comics, and advice animals.

So all in all, I think the time away gave me time to detox. If I had been on social media as I discovered those things, I can only imagine I very well may have become a Q believer as well.

Looking back I see how gullible I was in that moment, fooled by the onslaught of half truths and clever “logic” of the various theories. I know better now (and I should have known better then), but I’ve been humbled to the fact that everyone is vulnerable to this sort of stuff. To think otherwise is deluding yourself.

– redyellowblue5031

6.  “He required no proof.”

Not me, but got a flat Earther to question his beliefs (and hopefully critically analyze them) by giving him the proof he asked for, to which he responded “mainstream science and media are lies”.

I asked why he asked for proof if he could just disregard it as lies either way, then told him that since he required no proof (or evidence against) to believe something, it made him the easiest person to deceive and that it seemed pretty sheep-like to me.

He deleted all of his flat earth comments and hasn’t posted about it since.

​ – thelife0fZ

7. “Facts and logic.”

Surprisingly enough. Facts and logic. More specifically star patterns. What we observe can not happen on a flat earth.

– Safinkodyr

8. “Five years.”

It took about five years.

It was alot of willfull ignorance on my part, I just refused to question the logic of it. In fact I spent most of my time coming up with crazy fantasies about alot of things I didn’t understand.

But you have to understand that there is just so much we don’t know about that sometimes our priority on what is real and what can be believed can get confused.

I was learning so much so fast that I really didn’t question something so inane as the world being flat. Of course it was, why wouldn’t it be.

The day that changed it forever though was when I asked my father what happens when you get to the edge of the world, he of course said the world is round like a ball.

Being about five years old I thought that made alot of sense.

– Orbitaldropbear

9. “The Bible declared the earth was flat.”

Okay I get the question is funny and all but I actually did believe, for a time, that the earth was flat.

I was raised in a very religious family, and basically came to the conclusion that the Bible declared the earth was flat, because since I believed the earth was created in seven days, the idea that God set the stars in the sky in one day made much more sense if the stars were simply points of light in a sort of snow globe formation extrapolated onto a bigger scale. Otherwise, he took one day out of the seven to make a septillion or so balls of flaming gas, all with their own planets, and set each one into galaxies before breaking for lunch. It just didn’t make sense to me that he would spend five days on one planet, and make the creation of the trillions of other stuff in the universe a little footnote.

I was confronted about this belief a couple times, only one of which wasn’t laughed off. That single person who engaged started a serious discussion, presenting much more evidence for the globe earth, and eventually told me to watch Carl Sagan. The Cosmos series was on YouTube, and once I watched it, I had to know more.

Finally, a video from the channel MinutePhysics convinced me, in no uncertain terms, that the earth was round.

– maleorderbride

10. “A rabbit hole of conspiracies.”

I feel into a rabbit hole of conspiracies.

Thankfully, physics is a mandatory subject in Switzerland, made much more sense that any « top 10 facts that prove that the earth is flat

– Lykorice

11. “Winter in Brazil and summer in the USA.”

I once had a conversation with a professional UFC fighter and outspoken Flat Earther. I tried to explain how Archimedes was able to prove the Earth was round just by using his shadow. I mentioned air travel and how Hawaii and Japan are not 20+ hours of flying apart.

But what I think got through to him the most was seasons. This particular guy was Brazilian. I explained that because the Earth is round, it’s possible to be winter in Brazil and summer in the USA and vice versa.

He nodded and stared off into the distance silently and the conversation was over.

I don’t think I “converted” him but it gave him significant pause at the very least.

– PlaneShenaniganz

12. “Sunsets.”

Sunsets man. Sunsets.

I watched all these videos read a book on it talked to people about it. I was one of them.

Everyone else was crazy for not seeing the truth.(still i have a lot of questions about how the heck this thing could possibly be a globe but thats besides the point) but i had an answer for everything.

People would ask why dont we fall off the edge? There is no edge the earths an infinite space. Why do balloons pop when they go high enough? Because theres only so much air and it sinks to the earths surface but eventually you can fly above it and then theres no pressure of the air pushing against the ballon so it pops. Hows gravity work? Gravity is made up i believe in buoyancy.

But one day somebody asked me if the sun is a spotlight in the sky then how does a sunset work. I was like uh.. and i looked into it.

Couldn’t find anything that makes sense. Sunsets turned me back

– NamelessSithNPC

13. “It appears to be.”

While having coffee with my sister one day, she revealed that she was a flat earther.

I said I wasn’t going to try and convince her otherwise because if literally millions of pieces of evidence doesn’t convince you, then nothing I can say will, but I will ask you a couple of question so that I can understand a bit more. This was the brief conversation:

Q. Do you think the sun is round? Her answer – It appears to be

Q. Do you think the moon is round? Her answer – it appears to be

Q do you think all the other planets are round? Her answer – they appear to be

​So to clarify, you’re saying that the sun, the moon and all the planets are round but we’re floating on a flat disk in the same space. Ok.

I think it made a difference from the look on her face but we’ve never spoken of it again.

– ThelastReject

14. “The heartbreak seemed genuine.”

I entertained it for a while.

What convinced me the earth was a sphere was a video I came across of a group of flat earthers doing a laser test over water. They found a stretch of level water around 2 miles long, then used level lasers to measure the distance from the water.

The test came back quite accurately indicating the earth was a sphere and not flat. They all got super upset and were crying about it.

Seems like a doable and effective test and their reaction, confusion and heartbreak seemed genuine.

– w1lliamsss

15. “Keep a secret.”

Our government couldn’t even keep Bill Clinton’s Oval Office bl*wjob a secret.

You really think they can keep something that big a secret?

– HippoShogun

I’ve heard it said that you can’t reason a person out of a position they didn’t reason themselves into. I’m not sure I agree with that. I think the important thing to remember is that it almost never happens in just one conversation. It takes time. People change their minds in little bits.

What’s the craziest thing you used to believe?

Tell us in the comments.

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10 Times People Just Couldn’t Come Up With the Right Words

There’s this weird thing that can happen when you’ve heard a word or a phrase many times but you’ve never actually seen it written, then you yourself go to write it for the first time.

Sometimes it just results in what looks like a typo, but other times, it’s the funniest thing in the world. It’s most understandable when you’re dealing with, say, a foreign phrase (English speakers trying to phonetically stab at “bon appetit” has become an entire meme on its own, for example.) But sometimes, when the word of phrase if from your native language, and you STILL manage to get it so incredibly wrong, the best you can expect is some hard stares from the folks around you.

And maybe you should read a little more often, lest you end up on one of these Reddit posts.

10. Stone cold

I’m a little bit nervous about what’s gonna happen after this calm.

Calm be for the stone from BoneAppleTea

9. Glob ladders

Climbing your way toward better health!

Glob ladders from BoneAppleTea

8. Which came first?

Ya’ll are both wrong and you need to sit down.

egg corn from BoneAppleTea

7. Sensitive subjects

Wow, you’re really hitting him where it hurts.

Why are you so ego testicle from BoneAppleTea

6. Spell it out

Nevermind, I’ve lost my appetite.

Chipotle gone wrong from ihadastroke

5. Congratulations!

Weirdest bar mitzvah ever.

Mazel tov cocktail from BoneAppleTea

4. The big laugh

Is this a funnier sequel to The Big Short?

Big laugh from wildbeef

3. Watch out!

There’s no hiding from dat acid.

That ass hid is strong! from BoneAppleTea

2. Hoot hoot

When words fail, sounds will always be there for us.

*owl from ihadastroke

1. Root for the home team!

And now you’re gonna find yourself at some wild conventions.

Mascots are now called team furries in our house from technicallythetruth

Hope you found those as delicious as we did. Bone apple tea!

What’s a time you couldn’t figure out words?

Tell us in the comments.

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A Man’s Simple Quest for a Milkshake Got Weird Fast

We’ve all been on late night adventures to grab a snack. It can be a really fun diversion. It can also open up strange, unseen worlds known not to the day-dwellers among us.

But whatever story from your own life you’re now thinking of, I guarantee you it pales in comparison to that of Twitter user Josh Raby, who spelled out his own milkshake misadventure in exquisite, bizarre detail.

Chapter 1: I Am Begging Your Patience

When a midnight craving starts more than you bargained for.

Chapter 2: You Can Have It

Already, he’s not lovin’ it.

Chapter 3: My Desired Milkshake

At this point, nobody really remembers how to communicate.

Chapter 4: I Will Be Very Slow

Dude, I don’t need a milkshake THAT bad.

Chapter 5: A Deep Exhale

Oh. Maybe this isn’t such a funny story.

Chapter 6: An Apple Pie

Let them eat pie, I guess.

Chapter 7: A Weird Series of Beeps

Wait. WHAT?

Chapter 8: I Do Not Want

Quit playin with me, man.

Chapter 9: I Just Want to Go

This is too much.

Chapter 10: No Problem

You’re a part of the relationship now, friend.

Chapter 11: He Has His Thumb Out

So these two are, like, DEFINITELY high right?

Chapter 12: FINE

Why did you think you could just get away with that?

Chapter 13: 37 Minutes

Is this your anniversary or something?

Chapter 14: A Whole Separate Human

Spare a thought for those left behind.

I am agog. I am aghast. I may never seek another late night treat again.

What’s your weird late-night-out story?

Tell us in the comments.

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These Poor Souls Just Can’t With the Words

Do you know that thing where you just can’t think of a specific word? And you just kinda describe it or guess around it or whatever?

There’s a word for that, I’m sure. Ironically, I can’t think of it, so I’m trying to describe it or guess around it.

But that’s not nearly as embarrassing as what a lot of these folks are dealing with. Some of the people on the internet are fighting so hard to get the words out that you almost fear that they may lose the battle, like these examples via Reddit.

10. Hot food, comin’ through!

If I won nineteen thousand dollars, what I was gonna have for dinner that night might be the furthest thing from my mind.

Flaming Yawn from BoneAppleTea

9. Bond, flames bond

The man who knew too little.

Yee-haw! Nothing like a good old fashioned "Bond Fire"! from BoneAppleTea

8. Can I have some more due please?

Will there be nothing further, sir?

"further of due" from BoneAppleTea

7. Poetry attempts

If that doesn’t win their heart over, I genuinely don’t know what will.

bread from ihadastroke

6. Know Joe

We did it Joe…

Drunk friends are quality comedians from ihadastroke

5. Pea wall things

It’s kind of impressive to get something so common this wrong.

Pee wall things from wildbeef

4. Gourmet, and gonna stay that way

I don’t know whether to be excited or scared.

my mom’s back at it again from ihadastroke

3. Just in case

Bro that’s basically just tortilla.

Case idea from BoneAppleTea

2. “An eventful night”

When you got the spins so hard that the spins got you.

Asking how my friend was feeling after she had an eventful night from ihadastroke

1. So cool

Why, because it’s cold?

Shivery does exist from BoneAppleTea

If you DO come across that words I was trying to think of, put in a good word for me.

What’s a time recently when you did really bad with words?

Tell us in the comments.

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Real Stories of Creepy Encounters in Abandoned Building

The term “urban explorer” is used to describe folks who see an abandoned building and just can’t help but check it out.

It’s pretty exciting, but also potentially very dangerous, and spooky, not to mention usually illegal.

Still, we gotta hear the stories, right? Reddit user Inertia_Comrade certainly wanted to:

People who like to explore abandoned buildings. What was the biggest "fuck this, I’m out" moment you had while exploring? from AskReddit

Here are some of the real life chilling tales…

Good luck sleeping tonight!

1. The care home.

A group of us went into an old abandoned care home. (We got in legally). It was pitch black and I mean the type of darkness where you cannot see you hand in front of your face even when you let your eyes adjust. Fortunately we had a few light sources with us.

After walking around and finding copious amounts of evidence that there was squatters staying there (not at the time of our arrival thank god).

We found ourselves standing in a room filled with graffiti but not graffiti from a paint can. This was spelled in dried blood and excrement. The stench was horrendous. We got out of there so quick and have never been back since.

– mike-4510

2. A figure in the darkness.

Broke into an abandoned house in the village I grew up in in England back when I was a teenager, maybe 15 year ago now.

Was with a couple friends but broke off by myself and ventured upstairs, when I turned at the top of the stairs I saw a figure standing in the darkness just staring at me.

I bolted out of the building as quickly as I could and my friends heard me and panicked, they weren’t far behind. Went back there a couple of weeks later with a bigger group to “prove my story” and to my embarrassment.. it was a tall mirror at the top of the stairs, the figure I saw was me.

Not my proudest moment.

– mtblanche14

3. Who’s there?

I used to walk around an abandoned building near a forest which was initially a child hospital in the 70s, a refugee housing in the 90s and a language school for Chinese students till 2007. Since then it’s abandoned. The students left quite suddenly, so I found diaries, certificates and even food. It was interesting since the place was not vandalized at that time.

Once I was inside the building again when I realized someone else was walking upstairs. I never left this place so fast, jumped over the gate and headed to my car.

When I reached there, a police car stopped in front of the building and the two officers jumped over the fence to enter the building.

No idea what was there, but sometimes I wonder if I avoided more than just a report for trespassing.

– Cream314Bakery

4. Picture perfect.

Used to work for a guy renovating houses. He’d buy dumps for like 5 to 10 thousand that had been abandoned for years, we’d fix them up, and he’d rent the houses out.

His daughter would go to houses to take pictures after he bought them since he’d buy a lot of them site unseen because they were so cheap.

One house she went to take pictures at and she was kinda creeped out by the basement and did not want to go in. She just opened the door, leaned in, reached her arm out and took a picture. When her dad reviewed the pictures he saw a man standing in the basement about 5 feet from the camera staring directly into it.

– xxTurd

5. How did it get there?

Found a dead deer on top of an old grain mill. All of the stairs were removed so people couldn’t climb them.

Getting up there is hard enough without carrying a deer carcass on your shoulders. I think about it all the time lol

– ericshmurda

6. Well that can’t be good.

Found a bottle of some liquid in an abandoned drive in theater building. Knocked it over and the concrete starting smoking and we got nosebleeds instantly.

Still no clue what it was but we got the f*ck out

– Alert_Discipline_213

7. A sad story.

Danvers State Mental hospital. Stumbling across an overgrown graveyard full of tiny little headstones with nothing but patient numbers – no names, no dates.

The overwhelming inhumanity that all of those nameless graves represented hit me at once. I’m not easily frightened, and exploring an abandoned mental institution in the middle of the night had been an exciting adventure until that discovery.

Even then, I wasn’t afraid. Deeply saddened and nauseated, I lost my curiosity.

I felt ashamed to be intruding on a space that had seen levels of human cruelty and suffering far beyond what I could ever imagine so I left and never went back.

– logcabinfarmgirl

8. A murder mystery.

Several years ago, a man was murdered in the city I was working in and parts of his body were turning up at various locations. I think his hand and foot had been found and a week had passed.

I’m an architectural designer and I was surveying an abandoned chapel that was slated to be renovated into condos. It was apparent that homeless people had been squatting in the chapel but I wasn’t sure how recently they had been there. When I went into the basement though, it was clear someone was either there or had just left based on the smell. There were no lights due to the power being cut and I didn’t stick around long enough to see if anyone was currently occupying the space.

Two days later someone reported that they found the torso and head of the murdered man in a building attached to the chapel. I had been too freaked out by the smell in the basement to continue on to the attached building. But I’m almost certain I would have been the one to find the body.

– clex_ace

9. The tunnel.

As kids we would walk this 1/4 mile railway tunnel near where i grew up, there were no tracks but it was next to two live tunnels so there was a slight element of danger.

That and the fact it was trespassing i guess and railway workmen or transport police could catch us at any moment.

So as you can imagine it was dark, REAL dark in the middle, but towards the end there was enough light to barely see.

One day we took an old school pal down there and after walking the length, almost at the end of the tunnel just as it was beginning to get light he stopped to look down a large uncovered square 3ft by 3ft manhole….

No he didn’t fall in, but after a flash of brief confusion he took in a deep breath and screamed, then immediately started sprinting for daylight.

“Oh sh*t, F*ckn RRUUINNNNNN!!!” he screams

Naturally without question we ran, having a hard time catching him up.

At the mouth of the tunnel we stopped.

All out of breath “WTF !! What’s wrong? What did you see?” We asked.

His face was pure white, and shakeing barely able to speak he said ” there was someone down there, looking up at me!”

Now this buddy was and still is a good friend of mine, but back then he wasn known for not being the sharpest tool in the drawer…

instantly we had an idea what just happened, but slowly we returned to open manhole.

Then as the four of us stood around this hole looking down, sure enough….. Reflected in the still water about 5ft down this feckn hole was our four faces looking back up at us.

– 8bitPete

10. The prison.

Exploring an abandoned prison part of the ceiling collapsed. It didn’t hit me but it was close enough to knock me over.

I guess junkies used it as a place to shoot up because I fell on an old needle.

I got tested to make sure I didn’t get anything from it but it scared me enough to stay away from abandoned buildings to this day.

– stopfelnolm

11. Dead serious.

There was a coffin, a real coffin.

We were in a abandoned factory that some rich family had owned, and there was this one room with a bunch of personal stuff, letters from the fifties, furniture, old photographs, clothes, even booze, like someone’s home had been put in there.

In the middle of it all a coffin. I swear.

The room was gloomy, it was a late summer afternoon, no power and we didn’t have flashlights. My friend was like “we gotta open this coffin, we can’t leave unless we do, we gotta” and straight up lifted the lid. A sweet smell came from the darkness. When my grandmother died I was the one to find the corpse and I remember that one quite well.

So my heart skipped a couple of beats. The coffin was full of candles. They had a sweet smell.

– JohnSingapore

12. The stare.

Exploring an abandoned manor with some friends. We had been drinking and smoking and thought it would be cool.

The ground floor entrances were covered with bricks so we had to enter through the first floor (~8 ft height) using an improvised ladder made of old trash and wood pieces. It was quite unstable and hard to climb and we were 5 or 6 people.

Being the only way out, and knowing how slow it was, I was on edge the whole time.

We were exploring the floor, cool glass ceiling, lots of debris, but suddenly we find a room filled with plastic containers with pink and brown liquids… Some friends decide to explore the ground floor, which was pitch black and involved going down a broken staircase missing several steps. They heard someone coughing in the dark and feel several people moving in the darkness as their eyes get used to it… At this point I was hearing someone slowly walking in a room on the first floor, carefully stepping over the broken glass on the floor (to not make noise) which was really creepy.

We got the f*ck away and on our way out we saw a roughed up man with bloodshot eyes leaving a shack outside the house and staring at us.

I still shiver when I remember his look. Probably just some junkies living there but for overly high 15 year olds it was scary as f*ck

– mercuriaretrograda

13. As kids do.

As 12 year old kids, we were exploring the woods as kids do. The forest parted to an open field and in the distance was an abandoned farm.

Naturally we crept inside and in one of the horse stalls were all discarded hypodermic needles and old food.

Our parents were quite mad when we told them what we found

– gmc_lex

14. Wtf?

found what looked like the remains of a pig and it was wearing lingerie.

– BumBustingGreek

15. It’s a deal.

Well, a homeless guy with a knife said I shouldn’t be here, I agreed.

– OreoCrustedSausage

To be clear, we don’t condone this. Not least of all because it’s illegal. Be careful what you step into, you don’t know what you might find.

Do you have a story like this?

Share it with us in the comments.

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