People Share the Stupidest Ways They’ve Injured Themselves

We’ve all injured ourselves in pretty dumb ways at one point or another in our lives. Okay, it’s confession time: when I was 12, I broke my hand…punching my brother in the head. Let’s just say my parents were not thrilled.

I still haven’t lived that one down.

AskReddit users opened up and shared the dumbest ways they’ve ever been injured.

1. The grape incident.

“Threw a grape in the air to catch it in my mouth.

It fell on the floor and I bent down to pick it up and smashed my face into the window sill.”

2. Shower disaster.

“Showering at a hotel in a small stall with a slippery tile floor. Bent over to wash my feet, my butt hit the tap handle. I slipped, put my hands out to save myself and violently slammed the glass shower door open. I bashed my forehead and bridge of nose on the tile floor, had a major nose bleed and a giant goose egg on my forehead.

I don’t have bangs to cover that up. I thought I had escaped without the black eyes I expected after bashing my nose, but 2 days later I woke up with deep purple swollen eyelids. Luckily I had packed my seldom used makeup to cover the worst of it and I wore a hat in the day time. I’m still shocked the shower door didn’t shatter when it hit the wall.”

3. Ouch! That’s not good.

“I was in the 4th or 5th grade but I jumped down an entire flight of stairs.

Landed hard and hurt my foot. Walked on it for a day or two afterwards turned out I shattered my heel and broke my ankle.”

4. That is brutal.

“Tripped over a storage ottoman trying to jump over it all slick.

Got my toes wedged in the latch and broke my foot in 2 places.”

5. Time to tape the toes together.

“I live in Minnesota so I am used to kicking snow off my boots by slamming my toe part of the boot down on the ground.

Well, it was summer and I happened to get my running shoes absolutely covered in mud, so I instinctively slammed my toes down on the pavement and broke my toes.”

6. Right into the shin.

“Stabbed myself in the leg with a piece of metal.

It was really thin and tapered at the tip so when you swung it you would hear this really cool “Whoosh” sound.

I swung down way to hard and it went right into my shin. Bad times.”

7. That is odd.

“I got out of a long, hot shower and noticed a thread dangling off of my shirt, and when I tried to pull it out it just neatly sliced through several millimeters of my finger.

It was so minor I can hardly even call it an injury, but getting cut by a shirt is definitely the stupidest I’ve had.”

8. Funny but painful.

“Was helping husband replace the bathroom fan, so I was standing on the side of the bathtub.

I had this plastic hook glued to the shower wall to hang a loofa on. I went to get down and slid down the wall and hooked my butt cheek to the wall.

It hurt so bad but was also hilarious. I’m in my 40s and this happened recently.”

9. Getting old is no fun.

“I dropped something behind my couch, leaned over the back to pick it up and cracked a rib.

Was in pain for a week. Getting old is hell.”

10. Could’ve been worse.

“To try to get a cheap laugh out of my ex, I threw a hammer as hard as I could at a tree.

The hammer bounced off the tree, and I turned just in time for it to hit me in the small of my back.

Miracle I’m not paralyzed.”

11. An epic tale.

“When I was a kid, maybe 10 or so, I had recently discovered that the feet on my prosthetics could be unscrewed and moved into different positions, so I “borrowed” and Allen key from my dad and took it to school so I could unscrew my feet and show my friends at recess…non of them were as blown away by this as I’d hoped, pretty sure they were just used to this kind of thing by now haha.

Anyway, the bell went to tell us to go back to class and I very quickly tightened the feet back onto the prosthetics, put my shoes back on and started making my way back to class. As I was walking with a group of my classmates I started to notice my legs felt wobbly. I looked down and with every step my feet were turning outwards slightly. A normal person would have come to the conclusion “oh, I didn’t tighten the screws up enough”.

But not me, I jumped to the conclusion of “HOLY SHIT I CAN CONTROL MY FEET LIKE A ROBOT”. My excitement quickly turned to dread when I realised I don’t know how to control feet (been an amputee since I was a baby) and they kept turning until one was pointing sideways. Despite this I kept trying to walk and after a few more steps the foot just fell off and I managed to slam the now footless prosthetic down, which jarred my knee and hips and caused me to slip over and face plant into the corner of a cement mini wall (one of those waist high walls).

Being a self respecting 10yo I started bawling my eyes out, which caught the attention of the new teacher. It’s her first day and the only disabled student is in pieces, (the foot got thrown backwards when it fell off) with a bloodied nose, screaming like a banshee. She didn’t really know what to do since I couldn’t get back up, so she gave me some tissues for my nose and made a very confused call to the maintenance man asking if he knows how to fix prosthetics so I can get to the school nurse.”

12. That is messed up.

“Walked onto a manhole cover that was not placed on correctly.

Ended up in the hospital and had to to have 3 surgeries over 4 months.”

13. Not a good idea.

“My friend saw a jellyfish on the beach then kicked it. Like on purpose and knowing what it was.

They had to go to the ER.”

14. Watch out!

“Riding my bike home in 5th grade slowly alongside my walking friends.

Friend : Drew look where you’re going

Drew : naw dude I’m good at biking I can do it with my eyes closed

Friend : no really dude, look out

Drew : naw man, I’m good

Instantly crashes into a parked car, mess up my bike chain, have to drag my bike home in shame and explain to my mom why my knee and lip are bleeding.”

15. Walking from now on.

“Thought I could walk my dog on a leash while riding my bike. Dog saw a squirrel and yanked me off my bike. I broke a few bones in my hand.

Doc was like “what did you expect would happen?” “

16. Undone by a paper bag.

“Bending over to pick up a paper bag. A completely empty paper grocery store bag. It was standing upright, not even laying on the floor. I barely had to even bend down to pick it up.

Somehow this triggered a cosmic alignment between two vertebrae and nerve cluster because suddenly I fell to the floor in crippling pain, could not get my back straight and had to crawl to the living room so I could lay on the carpeted floor and try to stretch it out. I ended up fucked up like this for days and had to have physical therapy to slowly work out the pinched nerve. I was basically walking like Quasimodo for a couple weeks.

People would assume I was in an accident or lifting some boulder like Hercules or saving a child pinned under a car. But nope. I was undone by an empty paper bag.”

17. This person is definitely accident-prone.

“Wow, so many options.

Most recent. Working under my truck on a slight slope while on a creeper. Grabbed the undercarriage and yanked hard to slide to the back, forgot about slope and used excessive force. I probably would have wound up in the street, had all 250lbs of me not been decelerated by the top of my head hitting the differential. Woke up and it was darker and my neck was sore. I also had a horn like a unicorn (big lump). 2 weeks on concussion watch and wearing a hat to conceal the lump.

Most memorable. 8yo me finds a weird blue light bulb in the creek. Has what looks like mica inclusions in the glass and steel wool instead of a filament. 8yo me goes into the closet with a 9v battery and 2 wires to find out what it looks like lit. I hold it between index and middle finger and apply the wires. Eureka! Like a flash I realize. It’s a flash bulb. I am now blind, in a closet, 2 fingers melted to a hot flash bulb. Keystone Kops antics ensue.

Strangest. Talking to my sister on the landline in the kitchen. I have raccoon hands, always touching things, picking things up, etc while talking. At one point I wind up with a peanut butter cookie and an open flame. Even I don’t know how I got there, lol. Peanut butter cookie winds up on fire. I try to throw it into the sink, miss badly, cookie breaks up and flaming pieces fall on my bare feet. I learn there are a LOT of nerve endings on top of my feet. Screaming somehow communicates problem to sister, who I can hear laughing on the dropped handset.

Bonus. Forgot the cookie lesson regarding nerve endings. Barbecuing in a Weber kettle. In flip flops. I spread out the pile of briquettes once they were ready. Bottom vents were open and hot embers fell on my feet. Poured beer on my feet and increased the vocabulary of nearby children.”

18. Please don’t ever do that again.

“I was separating my eyelashes (because mascara) with a safety pin.

Stabbed myself in the eyeball.”

Wow. Those are pretty…dumb.

How about you? What’s the stupidest way you’ve ever injured yourself?

Don’t be shy! Tell us in the comments!

The post People Share the Stupidest Ways They’ve Injured Themselves appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share the Stupidest Ways They’ve Injured Themselves

We’ve all injured ourselves in pretty dumb ways at one point or another in our lives. Okay, it’s confession time: when I was 12, I broke my hand…punching my brother in the head. Let’s just say my parents were not thrilled.

I still haven’t lived that one down.

AskReddit users opened up and shared the dumbest ways they’ve ever been injured.

1. The grape incident.

“Threw a grape in the air to catch it in my mouth.

It fell on the floor and I bent down to pick it up and smashed my face into the window sill.”

2. Shower disaster.

“Showering at a hotel in a small stall with a slippery tile floor. Bent over to wash my feet, my butt hit the tap handle. I slipped, put my hands out to save myself and violently slammed the glass shower door open. I bashed my forehead and bridge of nose on the tile floor, had a major nose bleed and a giant goose egg on my forehead.

I don’t have bangs to cover that up. I thought I had escaped without the black eyes I expected after bashing my nose, but 2 days later I woke up with deep purple swollen eyelids. Luckily I had packed my seldom used makeup to cover the worst of it and I wore a hat in the day time. I’m still shocked the shower door didn’t shatter when it hit the wall.”

3. Ouch! That’s not good.

“I was in the 4th or 5th grade but I jumped down an entire flight of stairs.

Landed hard and hurt my foot. Walked on it for a day or two afterwards turned out I shattered my heel and broke my ankle.”

4. That is brutal.

“Tripped over a storage ottoman trying to jump over it all slick.

Got my toes wedged in the latch and broke my foot in 2 places.”

5. Time to tape the toes together.

“I live in Minnesota so I am used to kicking snow off my boots by slamming my toe part of the boot down on the ground.

Well, it was summer and I happened to get my running shoes absolutely covered in mud, so I instinctively slammed my toes down on the pavement and broke my toes.”

6. Right into the shin.

“Stabbed myself in the leg with a piece of metal.

It was really thin and tapered at the tip so when you swung it you would hear this really cool “Whoosh” sound.

I swung down way to hard and it went right into my shin. Bad times.”

7. That is odd.

“I got out of a long, hot shower and noticed a thread dangling off of my shirt, and when I tried to pull it out it just neatly sliced through several millimeters of my finger.

It was so minor I can hardly even call it an injury, but getting cut by a shirt is definitely the stupidest I’ve had.”

8. Funny but painful.

“Was helping husband replace the bathroom fan, so I was standing on the side of the bathtub.

I had this plastic hook glued to the shower wall to hang a loofa on. I went to get down and slid down the wall and hooked my butt cheek to the wall.

It hurt so bad but was also hilarious. I’m in my 40s and this happened recently.”

9. Getting old is no fun.

“I dropped something behind my couch, leaned over the back to pick it up and cracked a rib.

Was in pain for a week. Getting old is hell.”

10. Could’ve been worse.

“To try to get a cheap laugh out of my ex, I threw a hammer as hard as I could at a tree.

The hammer bounced off the tree, and I turned just in time for it to hit me in the small of my back.

Miracle I’m not paralyzed.”

11. An epic tale.

“When I was a kid, maybe 10 or so, I had recently discovered that the feet on my prosthetics could be unscrewed and moved into different positions, so I “borrowed” and Allen key from my dad and took it to school so I could unscrew my feet and show my friends at recess…non of them were as blown away by this as I’d hoped, pretty sure they were just used to this kind of thing by now haha.

Anyway, the bell went to tell us to go back to class and I very quickly tightened the feet back onto the prosthetics, put my shoes back on and started making my way back to class. As I was walking with a group of my classmates I started to notice my legs felt wobbly. I looked down and with every step my feet were turning outwards slightly. A normal person would have come to the conclusion “oh, I didn’t tighten the screws up enough”.

But not me, I jumped to the conclusion of “HOLY SHIT I CAN CONTROL MY FEET LIKE A ROBOT”. My excitement quickly turned to dread when I realised I don’t know how to control feet (been an amputee since I was a baby) and they kept turning until one was pointing sideways. Despite this I kept trying to walk and after a few more steps the foot just fell off and I managed to slam the now footless prosthetic down, which jarred my knee and hips and caused me to slip over and face plant into the corner of a cement mini wall (one of those waist high walls).

Being a self respecting 10yo I started bawling my eyes out, which caught the attention of the new teacher. It’s her first day and the only disabled student is in pieces, (the foot got thrown backwards when it fell off) with a bloodied nose, screaming like a banshee. She didn’t really know what to do since I couldn’t get back up, so she gave me some tissues for my nose and made a very confused call to the maintenance man asking if he knows how to fix prosthetics so I can get to the school nurse.”

12. That is messed up.

“Walked onto a manhole cover that was not placed on correctly.

Ended up in the hospital and had to to have 3 surgeries over 4 months.”

13. Not a good idea.

“My friend saw a jellyfish on the beach then kicked it. Like on purpose and knowing what it was.

They had to go to the ER.”

14. Watch out!

“Riding my bike home in 5th grade slowly alongside my walking friends.

Friend : Drew look where you’re going

Drew : naw dude I’m good at biking I can do it with my eyes closed

Friend : no really dude, look out

Drew : naw man, I’m good

Instantly crashes into a parked car, mess up my bike chain, have to drag my bike home in shame and explain to my mom why my knee and lip are bleeding.”

15. Walking from now on.

“Thought I could walk my dog on a leash while riding my bike. Dog saw a squirrel and yanked me off my bike. I broke a few bones in my hand.

Doc was like “what did you expect would happen?” “

16. Undone by a paper bag.

“Bending over to pick up a paper bag. A completely empty paper grocery store bag. It was standing upright, not even laying on the floor. I barely had to even bend down to pick it up.

Somehow this triggered a cosmic alignment between two vertebrae and nerve cluster because suddenly I fell to the floor in crippling pain, could not get my back straight and had to crawl to the living room so I could lay on the carpeted floor and try to stretch it out. I ended up fucked up like this for days and had to have physical therapy to slowly work out the pinched nerve. I was basically walking like Quasimodo for a couple weeks.

People would assume I was in an accident or lifting some boulder like Hercules or saving a child pinned under a car. But nope. I was undone by an empty paper bag.”

17. This person is definitely accident-prone.

“Wow, so many options.

Most recent. Working under my truck on a slight slope while on a creeper. Grabbed the undercarriage and yanked hard to slide to the back, forgot about slope and used excessive force. I probably would have wound up in the street, had all 250lbs of me not been decelerated by the top of my head hitting the differential. Woke up and it was darker and my neck was sore. I also had a horn like a unicorn (big lump). 2 weeks on concussion watch and wearing a hat to conceal the lump.

Most memorable. 8yo me finds a weird blue light bulb in the creek. Has what looks like mica inclusions in the glass and steel wool instead of a filament. 8yo me goes into the closet with a 9v battery and 2 wires to find out what it looks like lit. I hold it between index and middle finger and apply the wires. Eureka! Like a flash I realize. It’s a flash bulb. I am now blind, in a closet, 2 fingers melted to a hot flash bulb. Keystone Kops antics ensue.

Strangest. Talking to my sister on the landline in the kitchen. I have raccoon hands, always touching things, picking things up, etc while talking. At one point I wind up with a peanut butter cookie and an open flame. Even I don’t know how I got there, lol. Peanut butter cookie winds up on fire. I try to throw it into the sink, miss badly, cookie breaks up and flaming pieces fall on my bare feet. I learn there are a LOT of nerve endings on top of my feet. Screaming somehow communicates problem to sister, who I can hear laughing on the dropped handset.

Bonus. Forgot the cookie lesson regarding nerve endings. Barbecuing in a Weber kettle. In flip flops. I spread out the pile of briquettes once they were ready. Bottom vents were open and hot embers fell on my feet. Poured beer on my feet and increased the vocabulary of nearby children.”

18. Please don’t ever do that again.

“I was separating my eyelashes (because mascara) with a safety pin.

Stabbed myself in the eyeball.”

Wow. Those are pretty…dumb.

How about you? What’s the stupidest way you’ve ever injured yourself?

Don’t be shy! Tell us in the comments!

The post People Share the Stupidest Ways They’ve Injured Themselves appeared first on UberFacts.

Ex-Prisoners Talk About the Most Evil People They Encountered Behind Bars

I think going to prison would be the most terrifying experience imaginable.

Being locked up with murderers, rapists, and all kinds of other violent offenders has to do so much damage to a person’s psyche. Let’s hope that all of us (or at least most of us) never have to go through that.

AskReddit users shared their stories from when they did time.

1. Can’t forget it.

“The words “I shot that bitch in the stomach and I hope they both die” were used in reference to a 15 year old pregnant girl.

I won’t ever be able to forget that one.”

2. A simple farm boy.

“When I was in the outbox the day before I was released I was hanging out with a bunch of guys just killing time.

One of them was part of a killing gang. They kidnapped and killed a bunch of people for body parts. And cut them off while the people were alive. It was a pretty gruesome case.

Anyways, he was really quiet and rather stupid. Just a simple farm boy type.”

3. Seemed nice enough…

“English guy here, I spent 4 and a half months in prison in 2018. There was a guy who was really nice, seemed like a genuine guy.

That was until I found out her strangled his drunk wife to death and left her there whilst he went to work the next morning.”

4. The Aurora movie theater shooter.

“Before I got my prison sentence in 2013 I was in Arapahoe County jail with James Holmes. Was pretty crazy cuz they’d put the whole facility on lockdown to move him, Even though he was in segregation.”

5. Not an inmate.

“There was a correctional officer at least 6’5 and well built and he would always come in pissed off. So one morning we are waiting in line for breakfast and he thought he heard this older man call him a bitch. He followed the man back to his cell and started teeing off on him.

The man didn’t even try fighting back and when he fell the first time he split his head open on the steel bunk. The inmate was so out of it he started asking were his car keys and wallet went while he was on the ground bleeding. The C.O. hears the man and for some reason turns around and goes back and hits him a few more times and says “who’s the bitch now…”.

I’ll never forget thinking ‘damn this is somebodies father’.”

6. OH MY GOD.

“One of the women on my wing cut up her lover and put his body parts in an empty TV box, then put the box on his mother’s door step.”

7. This is brutal.

“I was in and out juvy from 15-18 till I went to county jail, the worst people I came into contact was a boy 15 who shot his step mother, slit her throat, beat her head in with a blunt object, wrapped her in sheets for the fathers roommate to find her then he shot him. Happened in McMinnville Oregon. Other than that a lot of people raping siblings, and making threats to shoot up the high schools in the area. That’s Yamhill County for you.

8. Women’s prison.

“I was locked up with Jodi Arias, so that was bizarre.

There was also a woman who murdered her baby and kept it in the freezer. We called her Maytag.”

9. No remorse.

“This rich kid stabbed his friend in the chest, killing him, but he was on Xanax and weed at the time and doesn’t remember anything of it other than his friend on the floor dying, the mad thing is this guy (18 years old) actually got off with the murder and found not guilty although was sent down for just under 2 years for possession of a knife. His parents were quite wealthy and it was a big case in the UK. Basically his barristers were the best money could buy and he said that’s how he got off.

He didnt have any remorse for his actions. Which was made to think made him a pretty fucked up person. It’s a funny one though because he actually seemed a nice guy until he would talk about the killing and just didnt care what he had done. Nobody else in the prison had ever killed anyone to my knowledge, as it was a lower cat prison – but he was only their for possession of an knife.”

10. All kinds of psychos.

“I was incarcerated with over 280 people doing life without parole. There were all kinds- Stabbed the neighbor lady 150+ times, shot a bully in the head in the school parking lot, beat a dude with a hammer, etc.

There were two that stuck with me though- one where he looked me right in the eye and told me about shooting a guy with a shotgun to the chest (creeped me the f out), weirdo that kidnapped and killed some girl in his basement was another. John Wayne Gacy actually designed the miniature golf course there.”

11. 99 to life.

“Was in prison for 27 months. Unfortunately, your child rapists and kiddie porn guys were mixed in to gen pop, so you would get all kinds like that everywhere. The worst one I heard of was when I was in military prison. Details are foggy because this was 13 years ago, but I remember there being a guy who got 99 years for murder.

He had killed a guy, then killed the guys wife because she was home and would have been a witness, but not before raping her first. The whole facility got locked down every time they moved this guy, because they didnt even want the other inmates to see what he looked like.

The other fucked up one was at the same facility. So in the army there’s a thing called turtlefucking, where you hit someone’s kevlar helmet with your kevlar helmet. It makes a loud THONK sound, but doesnt really hurt. People didnt hit super hard, just hard enough to make the noise happen. This guy turtlefucked a girl when she wasnt wearing a kevlar helmet. She ended up dying while the guy was still awaiting his trial, and he went full on cuckoo bananas.”

12. KKK member.

“I had a cellie in prison who was a KKK “white boy.” He was a mad man. He was always pissed off and would say the craziest stuff like “Did you hear that? The “white” rhino is going extinct. Fucking jews.”

I was watching the movie about black pilots in WWII and he sat down indignant and rolled his eyes and guffawed… “Black Pilots!?! C’mon.” I said “You really think there are no black pilots?” He said “Hell no, have you ever seen a black pilot?” It was like this every day until my move finally got approved.”

13. From an officer’s perspective.

“I wasn’t an inmate, I was an officer so my opinion might be disqualified. But at a facility I worked at we were a level 5 which is maximum security. Lots of people who had life without parole and just a bunch of different things happened. One guy was on a documentary because he traveled across several states and killed around 5 people total. He was pissed cause the documentary blamed him but he always tried to say his father hitting him as a child made him kill these people.

Then there’s the old guy who raped his young grandchildren and was furious that he was sent to prison cause they were HIS grandkids so he could do whatever he wanted. He had also raped his children when they were growing up.

Lots of sick things in a max security prison and those would be nothing when compared to a federal supermax.”

14. Sounds like a nightmare.

“Ahh.. theres different degrees to evil.. one of the smallest black guys in there was SO loud and would not stop talking. He eventually freaked out and cut his body up with a razor blade to get medical attention for a different scene.. another guy was young, got beat by a 70 yr. Old in dominoes. The young guy just straight punched the old man in the forehead, I was reading Marley and me, and it just sounded like someone hit a watermelon super hard. I looked up, old man was knocked out on the floor, when he came to, these other 18 yr old kids were cracking up laughing and the old man was sooo confused and kept asking why are you laughing?

A white guy who was small and young was the jack russell terrier of the pod, and he was the worst. He would just constantly steal and for some reason nobody did anything about it. Guy named nick looked just like mike Tyson and would fight white ppl who would work out bc they were doing it wrong..he would also stare at you while you were taking a shit.

There was one corrections officer who assaulted me in a bathroom during work duty bc I didnt know if a roll of toilet paper should be changed out.. there was like a 1/3 left. It was my first day, he thought I was fucking with him. After he hit me and was done, I said Sooooo, does it need to be changed i still dont know. He figured out I was serious and apologized. One CO always snuck me coffee and let me watch football on tv bc I was nice and worked hard.”

15. In the Bronx.

“Was in Spofford Juvenile detention center when I was 13 (not a good age to be there at 4’9 100 lbs) and I was one of two Caucasian’s in the entire place so I mostly kept to myself. I did befriend a kid named Chris Whitehead who showed up with a freshly healed scar about 15-20 inches long in the shape of a C on the side of his head. He didn’t talk much but he ended up telling me how it happened when I finally got the nerve to ask him.

Told me his older brother jumped him into the Crips and since he cried during he took a hot knife and burned it into his head for the disrespect. Then he had his little brother, the same age as me by the way, shoot the first person to cross the street in their neighborhood, who ended up being a young pregnant girl. How he only ended up at Spofford is beyond me but it was disgusting to see such a nice kid end up there because of his older piece of shit brother.

I remember when he went to court he was sure he’d be transferred so he pissed all over his jump suit and stuffed it in the radiator causing all of us in the semi violent block to be moved upstairs with the actual violent criminals (I think the kid I’m referring to was only on mine because of his age). The staff members there gave everyone there permission to beat the living shit out of him when he came back but he never did because he got transferred thankfully because his brother ended up there too and was fully on board with the beat down his brother was going to receive.

Really glad they shut down that place because they were running drugs and a prostitution ring on the female side and the treatment of the kids there was disgusting to say the least.”

Yikes. Prison is no place for this guy, I can tell you that much.

Have you ever spent any time behind bars or maybe a friend or family member did some time?

If so, tell us what it was like in the comments. We’d love to hear about your experiences!

The post Ex-Prisoners Talk About the Most Evil People They Encountered Behind Bars appeared first on UberFacts.

Ex-Prisoners Talk About the Most Evil People They Encountered Behind Bars

I think going to prison would be the most terrifying experience imaginable.

Being locked up with murderers, rapists, and all kinds of other violent offenders has to do so much damage to a person’s psyche. Let’s hope that all of us (or at least most of us) never have to go through that.

AskReddit users shared their stories from when they did time.

1. Can’t forget it.

“The words “I shot that bitch in the stomach and I hope they both die” were used in reference to a 15 year old pregnant girl.

I won’t ever be able to forget that one.”

2. A simple farm boy.

“When I was in the outbox the day before I was released I was hanging out with a bunch of guys just killing time.

One of them was part of a killing gang. They kidnapped and killed a bunch of people for body parts. And cut them off while the people were alive. It was a pretty gruesome case.

Anyways, he was really quiet and rather stupid. Just a simple farm boy type.”

3. Seemed nice enough…

“English guy here, I spent 4 and a half months in prison in 2018. There was a guy who was really nice, seemed like a genuine guy.

That was until I found out her strangled his drunk wife to death and left her there whilst he went to work the next morning.”

4. The Aurora movie theater shooter.

“Before I got my prison sentence in 2013 I was in Arapahoe County jail with James Holmes. Was pretty crazy cuz they’d put the whole facility on lockdown to move him, Even though he was in segregation.”

5. Not an inmate.

“There was a correctional officer at least 6’5 and well built and he would always come in pissed off. So one morning we are waiting in line for breakfast and he thought he heard this older man call him a bitch. He followed the man back to his cell and started teeing off on him.

The man didn’t even try fighting back and when he fell the first time he split his head open on the steel bunk. The inmate was so out of it he started asking were his car keys and wallet went while he was on the ground bleeding. The C.O. hears the man and for some reason turns around and goes back and hits him a few more times and says “who’s the bitch now…”.

I’ll never forget thinking ‘damn this is somebodies father’.”

6. OH MY GOD.

“One of the women on my wing cut up her lover and put his body parts in an empty TV box, then put the box on his mother’s door step.”

7. This is brutal.

“I was in and out juvy from 15-18 till I went to county jail, the worst people I came into contact was a boy 15 who shot his step mother, slit her throat, beat her head in with a blunt object, wrapped her in sheets for the fathers roommate to find her then he shot him. Happened in McMinnville Oregon. Other than that a lot of people raping siblings, and making threats to shoot up the high schools in the area. That’s Yamhill County for you.

8. Women’s prison.

“I was locked up with Jodi Arias, so that was bizarre.

There was also a woman who murdered her baby and kept it in the freezer. We called her Maytag.”

9. No remorse.

“This rich kid stabbed his friend in the chest, killing him, but he was on Xanax and weed at the time and doesn’t remember anything of it other than his friend on the floor dying, the mad thing is this guy (18 years old) actually got off with the murder and found not guilty although was sent down for just under 2 years for possession of a knife. His parents were quite wealthy and it was a big case in the UK. Basically his barristers were the best money could buy and he said that’s how he got off.

He didnt have any remorse for his actions. Which was made to think made him a pretty fucked up person. It’s a funny one though because he actually seemed a nice guy until he would talk about the killing and just didnt care what he had done. Nobody else in the prison had ever killed anyone to my knowledge, as it was a lower cat prison – but he was only their for possession of an knife.”

10. All kinds of psychos.

“I was incarcerated with over 280 people doing life without parole. There were all kinds- Stabbed the neighbor lady 150+ times, shot a bully in the head in the school parking lot, beat a dude with a hammer, etc.

There were two that stuck with me though- one where he looked me right in the eye and told me about shooting a guy with a shotgun to the chest (creeped me the f out), weirdo that kidnapped and killed some girl in his basement was another. John Wayne Gacy actually designed the miniature golf course there.”

11. 99 to life.

“Was in prison for 27 months. Unfortunately, your child rapists and kiddie porn guys were mixed in to gen pop, so you would get all kinds like that everywhere. The worst one I heard of was when I was in military prison. Details are foggy because this was 13 years ago, but I remember there being a guy who got 99 years for murder.

He had killed a guy, then killed the guys wife because she was home and would have been a witness, but not before raping her first. The whole facility got locked down every time they moved this guy, because they didnt even want the other inmates to see what he looked like.

The other fucked up one was at the same facility. So in the army there’s a thing called turtlefucking, where you hit someone’s kevlar helmet with your kevlar helmet. It makes a loud THONK sound, but doesnt really hurt. People didnt hit super hard, just hard enough to make the noise happen. This guy turtlefucked a girl when she wasnt wearing a kevlar helmet. She ended up dying while the guy was still awaiting his trial, and he went full on cuckoo bananas.”

12. KKK member.

“I had a cellie in prison who was a KKK “white boy.” He was a mad man. He was always pissed off and would say the craziest stuff like “Did you hear that? The “white” rhino is going extinct. Fucking jews.”

I was watching the movie about black pilots in WWII and he sat down indignant and rolled his eyes and guffawed… “Black Pilots!?! C’mon.” I said “You really think there are no black pilots?” He said “Hell no, have you ever seen a black pilot?” It was like this every day until my move finally got approved.”

13. From an officer’s perspective.

“I wasn’t an inmate, I was an officer so my opinion might be disqualified. But at a facility I worked at we were a level 5 which is maximum security. Lots of people who had life without parole and just a bunch of different things happened. One guy was on a documentary because he traveled across several states and killed around 5 people total. He was pissed cause the documentary blamed him but he always tried to say his father hitting him as a child made him kill these people.

Then there’s the old guy who raped his young grandchildren and was furious that he was sent to prison cause they were HIS grandkids so he could do whatever he wanted. He had also raped his children when they were growing up.

Lots of sick things in a max security prison and those would be nothing when compared to a federal supermax.”

14. Sounds like a nightmare.

“Ahh.. theres different degrees to evil.. one of the smallest black guys in there was SO loud and would not stop talking. He eventually freaked out and cut his body up with a razor blade to get medical attention for a different scene.. another guy was young, got beat by a 70 yr. Old in dominoes. The young guy just straight punched the old man in the forehead, I was reading Marley and me, and it just sounded like someone hit a watermelon super hard. I looked up, old man was knocked out on the floor, when he came to, these other 18 yr old kids were cracking up laughing and the old man was sooo confused and kept asking why are you laughing?

A white guy who was small and young was the jack russell terrier of the pod, and he was the worst. He would just constantly steal and for some reason nobody did anything about it. Guy named nick looked just like mike Tyson and would fight white ppl who would work out bc they were doing it wrong..he would also stare at you while you were taking a shit.

There was one corrections officer who assaulted me in a bathroom during work duty bc I didnt know if a roll of toilet paper should be changed out.. there was like a 1/3 left. It was my first day, he thought I was fucking with him. After he hit me and was done, I said Sooooo, does it need to be changed i still dont know. He figured out I was serious and apologized. One CO always snuck me coffee and let me watch football on tv bc I was nice and worked hard.”

15. In the Bronx.

“Was in Spofford Juvenile detention center when I was 13 (not a good age to be there at 4’9 100 lbs) and I was one of two Caucasian’s in the entire place so I mostly kept to myself. I did befriend a kid named Chris Whitehead who showed up with a freshly healed scar about 15-20 inches long in the shape of a C on the side of his head. He didn’t talk much but he ended up telling me how it happened when I finally got the nerve to ask him.

Told me his older brother jumped him into the Crips and since he cried during he took a hot knife and burned it into his head for the disrespect. Then he had his little brother, the same age as me by the way, shoot the first person to cross the street in their neighborhood, who ended up being a young pregnant girl. How he only ended up at Spofford is beyond me but it was disgusting to see such a nice kid end up there because of his older piece of shit brother.

I remember when he went to court he was sure he’d be transferred so he pissed all over his jump suit and stuffed it in the radiator causing all of us in the semi violent block to be moved upstairs with the actual violent criminals (I think the kid I’m referring to was only on mine because of his age). The staff members there gave everyone there permission to beat the living shit out of him when he came back but he never did because he got transferred thankfully because his brother ended up there too and was fully on board with the beat down his brother was going to receive.

Really glad they shut down that place because they were running drugs and a prostitution ring on the female side and the treatment of the kids there was disgusting to say the least.”

Yikes. Prison is no place for this guy, I can tell you that much.

Have you ever spent any time behind bars or maybe a friend or family member did some time?

If so, tell us what it was like in the comments. We’d love to hear about your experiences!

The post Ex-Prisoners Talk About the Most Evil People They Encountered Behind Bars appeared first on UberFacts.

People Who Left in the Middle of a Date Share What Happened

Have you ever been on a date that was so bad that you just got up and left in the middle of it? Or maybe you were on the receiving end of such a situation?

Either way, it’s awkward and uncomfortable for everyone involved.

AskReddit users shared their stories where this took place.

1. Do you have the plague?

“I told her I was color blind, she recoiled and said it was “gross” and sat there looking at me like I had the plague or something.

I just sort of got up and left.

It was really odd.”

2. A little too pushy.

“She started talking about ‘our wedding’ and ‘our future kids’ on our first date. She wasn’t joking around, and when I told her that it was way too sudden to be talking about that, she looked at me quizically and said “Don’t you want to get married?”

First online date I’d ever gone on. Plenty of awkward ones after that (including the girl who got drunk then admitted she had an infant son and lived with her ex-husband), but that one took the cake.”

3. That’s very awkward.

“He brought another girl with him.

We had agreed to go for dinner, then see a movie together, not with anyone else, as a date. We had definitely agreed it was, in fact, a date. I would’ve understood if we hadn’t made it clear if it was a date, but we both knew it was.

Anyways, he shows up with another girl. He pretty much ignores me the entire time, the bitch is sneering at me when he isn’t looking. Why agree to a date when you’re going to bring another girl? He didn’t even tell me he was going to bring someone. He just did.

When we get to the movies, we take our seats, and I said ‘I’m going to the washroom’ and grabbed my stuff and left.”

4. By the way…

“Guy from OkCupid a few years back.

Takes me to a 5 star restaurant, I try to stick to the middle of the road drinks/food as it’s a first date. Dinner went really well so we decide to go for post-dinner drinks. I get to the point where I feel I should stop drinking since it’s a first date and I wasn’t really ready for him to see me trashed. He orders me another drink and then invites me over to his house because his wife is out of town.

Date over.”

5. What are your intentions?

“We met online.

She brought her sister on our first date. She never spoke and all her sister did was drill me about “my plans” and “my intentions.” After ordering she said “I hope you’re planning on paying. That’s what a real man would do on a first date.”

So I said “true but this wasn’t a date, it was a job interview” I dropped my half in cash and walked out. Btw I drove us there.

Never heard from them again.”

6. I’m very important.

“Blind date, Indian restaurant. First thing he does is produce a folder of photos of him and various celebrities. Shows me them, one by one. He keeps…clutching at me.

After about 15 minutes of this, I say “this isn’t really – I don’t think we’re compatible. I think I should go” and get up to leave. He stood up too, and shouted at me as I left. No, I did not look back.

This happened in the mid-1980s, so unless the guy you’re thinking of is now in his 70s, it’s not him.

Yes, a real manila folder, with 8×10 glossies, in a real manila enevelope. Mid 1980s. No Photoshop, no iphone.

The two celebs I remember seeing are Jimmy Carter and the Dalai Lama. Remember, this was 30 years ago.

No, I don’t remember what he was shouting. I was focused on GTFO of there, and as I said, 30 years ago.

No, I don’t remember which Indian restaurant, but it was in Cambridge MA. Yellow walls.

Yes, he was a Harvard man. No, he was not blind. A “blind date” is when somebody fixes you up with somebody you don’t know, or when you go out with somebody you’ve met via a dating service or ad. (No photos back then; just descriptions.)

Also, I am so glad this entertained you all. My operating principle re: nightmare experiences is “This is God’s way of giving us drinking stories.” You’ve proved me right.”

7. The baby was sober…

“Met girl online.

She shows up for our first date drunk, with her drunk friend… and one month old son that she had forgot to mention (baby was sober I think).

I excused myself to the restroom and ran like my ass was on fire.”

8. Sounds like a keeper.

“He was 45 minutes late, got mad that another guy had started chatting me up at the bar while I waited.

Then proceeded to tell me about the hidden satanic messages in the opening ceremony of the Olympics.”

9. Creeper City.

“I was in my late teens and went on a date with a friend of a friend. He seemed nice, and I got the OK from my bff, so I anticipated a pleasant, quiet evening – we were just going for frozen yogurt and TV at his house, after all. Well everything’s going smooth and he seems really sweet. He tells me he likes to write poetry and my teenage girl brain is thinking, “Wow! A sensitive guy! How refreshing.” Then he tells me that he wants to show me something. I assumed it was a poem he wrote because we had just talked about it.

ME: “Ok! What is it?”
HIM: “Well, it’s not ready yet, but it will be in a couple minutes.” As he leans over on his side, away from me. ME: Confused, because I’m expecting a poem… is he going to write a poem in a couple minutes? This is going to be awkward.

Then he starts making all these innuendos about what it is. I get annoyed because he sounds like he’s describing his penis, and the joke is dying fast. Finally, just to shut him up, I say, “If it’s your DICK then NO I DON’T want to see it!”

HIM: “Oh… okay then.” And he sits back normally on the couch. I’m super confused and think he’s pulling my leg. I ask if he’s kidding and says no. He seriously wanted to whip out his junk and show me.
ME: “What the hell am I supposed to say to you while your dick is out?!”
HIM: “Well, my last girlfriend told me she’d been waiting to see it all night.” ME: Stunned silence. Then, “Ohh…kay…”

Being the awkward teen I was, I sat back into the couch, not touching him (we had been cuddling up until that conversation) and uncomfortably waited out the remainder of whatever show was on TV – and then bolted.

After I got home, I called my BFF and frantically told her what had happened. Her response? “Ohhh, yeah, I forgot to tell you. He likes to do that.””

10. I’m a professional.

“OKcupid date – emailed back and forth, had some common interests, seemed like we would get along. We met up and got food, a couple drinks, seemed to be getting along well. Then he starts talking about how good he is at Karaoke.

He’s been in contests and won first place, he and his friends go all the time, etc. I tell him I’ve only done karaoke a few times, when very drunk and with a big group of friends. I also mention that I’m pretty sure I’m tone deaf. He tells me there is a Karaoke place only one block away!!!

I tell him I’m not interested. He tells me you get your own little booth. No one else will even hear you. You can pick whatever songs you want!!! No waiting while other people sing!!! It’s clear he’s not giving up, so I grab two shots of vodka and say fine, I’ll try it. We go to the karaoke lounge and get our booth and he does three or four songs perfectly. I start my first song and he starts criticizing me, and pointing out what i’m doing wrong WHILE I’m trying to sing.

Then he picks up the other mic and starts singing over me. I say fuck this and just get up to leave. He chases after me and tells me -” I need you to pay for half of this”. It’s $60. I look in my wallet, take out the only cash I had and said “here’s $20, and you can go fuck yourself”. Then he follows me to the bus stop and tried to make idle chit chat while I wait to get the fuck away from him.”

11. Show and tell.

“Had joined a new sports club and there was one guy who was quiet and kind of just hung around the periphery of the group. I felt kind of bad for him so was always trying to bring him into conversations and talk to him. One night we all went out for drinks after the game and I talked to him for awhile.

Conversation was hard work but he seemed like a nice guy. He texted and asked me if I wanted to go out for coffee. I wasn’t really interested but knew given how quiet he was that it probably took a ton of nerve to text me that and I thought maybe in a 1:1 environment he would be more comfortable and I could get to know him a little more.

We met at the coffee shop and he had a big backpack with him. We ordered drinks then chatted, with me again doing most of the talking – he rarely initiated but would answer questions. About 1/2 hour in he said he had a few things to show me to let me get to know him better. He then did a show and tell from his backpack pulling out various items and pictures and telling me about them.

Some were kind of interesting (a family trip) and some I had no idea how to respond to (here is a picture of how I had my hair cut in grade 8). He had stuffed animals and lots of items from his childhood. I kept trying to bring the conversation to the present to find out if the item linked to a current interest or hobby but he kind of had the story about each item rehearsed and he would go right back to the show and tell.

Eventually the table was full of stuff and I tried to politely say that I had seen enough and change the topic. He told me had still had more to show me. I ended up saying I felt sick and left. I felt kind of bad but it was just getting too weird.”

12. Blame it on the pot pie.

“I left in the middle of a movie once. The date was going great but I forgot that I had left a pot pie in the oven in my apartment (only broke college guys and old people eat pot pies). I remembered a few minutes in and whispered something along the lines of “gotta get my pot pie out of the oven so I don’t burn down my apartment I’ll be right back.”

I did return but she was pissed. Thought we could go see the pot pie and have a laugh. Arrived at my previously empty apartment to find my brother and the neighbor girls drunk and naked in my living room. Showed her the pot pie and she said something along the lines of “you’re an asshole take me home”.”

13. Two-timing.

“I’ve had a girl walk out on me, took me weeks to realise why.

This was date 3. We’d met initially at a nightclub randomly, kinda just said hi and our groups merged (the boys and her girls), met up a week later at a carnival and ha a great time.

This day in particular, we met up for a basic lunch at a nice little spot near my place and just had nothing to talk about (which was odd, she seemed semi vacant). Lunch goes by with small talk, we pay separately and she asks to come back to my place – no problems there, she’s an attractive girl and I have a penis. Anyhow, we get back to my place, she throws on a dvd while I snack up the coffee table and we start talking about pet peeves with the opposite sex.

Usual things come up first, like toilet seat positioning and ‘get ready time’ for outings. Somehow it leads on to a story about this girl I knew who was ‘dating’ me whilst having an actual boyfriend on the side, and how disrespectful it was in the end. She just goes pale white, grabs her stuff and makes some excuse about forgetting something at home.

I thought I’d maybe sounded a bit cocky or come across like a douchebag, kinda felt like an ass for a day or so and moved on. My housemate ran into her and her boyfriend shopping a week later. That was awkward.”

14. Well, that’s a little forward.

“Went to get coffee to test the waters with someone new.

First thing he did was ask me to turn around and lift my shirt so he can see my ass.

I got up, turned around and walked out the door.”

I can honestly say that I’ve never walked out of a date…even though I wanted to sometimes…

Has this ever happened to you? Or maybe you were the one who walked out?

Tell us about your bad date experiences in the comments!

The post People Who Left in the Middle of a Date Share What Happened appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share How They’d Ruin a First Date Immediately

I’m not sure who would purposely ruin a first date, but there are a ton of weirdos out there, so anything goes these days, it seems.

The question posed on AskReddit was: “You got ten seconds to ruin a first date. How?”

And AskReddit users let us into their twisted little worlds…enjoy!

1. Let’s speed this up.

“Tell them to make this quick you have another one in an hour.”

2. That was Johnny.

“Answer a fake phone call with “Hey babe. Yeah I’m at the bar with Johnny. See you later. Love you!’”

3. Mommy says so.

“Mom says I have to go on at least one date a month or else she’ll cut me off.

So let’s get this over with.”

4. Put a scare into them.

“Oh, I’m so glad you agreed to meet. My kids need a new Daddy.

Since I’ve been cleared of that *air quotes* accident my late husband had, it’s time to get back out there.

*takes phone call, whispering* No, no, he’s here. Yeah. No, he’s not a drinker so the liver should be fine.”

5. Some light conversation.

“What’s your stance on abortion?

Because you should know my stance on condoms.”

6. That should do it.

“Her: “Hi! Thank you for coming to pick me up!”

Me: “I don’t think I could have waited another second.” and then rip the juiciest, rankest fart possible just after she’s gotten in the car and make sure to lock the windows so she can’t get fresh air. Follow with “You’re WELCOME.” “

7. Dig for gold.

“Don’t say a word, lock eyes, and just go knuckle deep in my nose and dig around for a good long while.”

8. You might get punched.

“I have another girl waiting so if we’re not gonna fuck after this I need to go.”

9. Forgot about that.

“Whoops left this on.

Slip off wedding band.”

10. This will get you in trouble.

“Laugh very loudly and obnoxiously and then exclaim, “I haven’t laughed this hard since 9/11″

Works every time.”

11. This is a great opportunity.

“Admit you aren’t attracted to them and only invited them out to hear about your great MLM business opportunity.”

12. How rude!

“I much rather be doing something else right now, but I guess this will do.”

13. Too much, too soon.

“I think I’m falling in love with you.”

14. If they agree, it all works out.

“I’d say “So now that I’m here we can discuss prices.

For me being at this dinner it’s $250. If you want to have sex later it will be an extra $500.”

15. Creeper vibes.

“Aww. Look at this puppy!

It’s so sexy, makes me really horny.”

16. Oh, Mother! She always knows best!

“Just reply with laughing for 5 seconds minimum followed by “Mother always says that!””

17. Put them to sleep.

“Explain the intricate details as to why RBMK Reactor number 4 failed causing Europe’s biggest nuclear accident.”

18. First things first.

“Ask to see their feet before even greeting them.”

19. I think that would probably work.

“Scratch my scalp furiously and say, “Ugh, I hate having fleas!””

20. Meet the family!

“We can’t order until my wife and kids get here to see if they like you.”

21. He’ll be gone in no time.

“I’m gonna walk in, in a wedding dress with a priest, ask him to marry me.”

Those all sound pretty good to me! Cheers to ruining a first date!

What do you think? Have you ever sabotaged a date on purpose? Or maybe you blew it on accident and regretted it?

Share your dating disaster stories with us in the comments!

The post People Share How They’d Ruin a First Date Immediately appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share Funny Stories About Breaking School Rules

School is a necessary part of everyone’s lives and attendees end up with a few good memories and an education. But it’s also a place with a lot of rules and regulations that don’t always make sense.

Teen years are rife with the desire to rebel against adults who don’t always get it. A Reddit thread asked people to talk about the time Redditors may have seen someone creatively break a rule.

Answers range from cringeworthy to hilarious. Let’s take a look!

10. He Did Say No Blue Mohawks

Punk style was reviled in the 1980s, but one kid found a loophole.

“Back in the 1980’s there was one kid in my school was hardcore into the punk scene. Had a bright blue, 6” high, razor thin, stand-up-straight mohawk.

The principal gave him detention for being a distraction, etc. and his parting words that day were “And tomorrow…no more blue mohawk!”

The next day the kid came in with the same mohawk, only bright pink.”—BagsOfCowSnot

9. This Teacher Was Totally Wrong

Sometimes substitutes enforce rules for the wrong reasons.

“No hats in school.

In high school junior year,, There was this one kid in my grade that was allowed to due to him having Alopecia Universalis, which is basically having rapid baldness.

A new teacher wasn’t aware that he was allowed to and asked him to take it off. The kid explained why he was able to, but the sub didn’t believe him, forced him to take it off, and was being very cruel to him for wearing the hat/his lack of hair.

The next day, everyone wore hats to school as a sort of rebellion against the teacher. She got really mad and started yelling at the students and said some nasty things.

She got fired.”—6lesbianlover9

8. A Jacket Ban?!

This was bound to make students break the rules for their own well-being.

“Senior year, my school banned jackets. A friend was cold, wore his jacket to lunch, and the VP told him to take it off. Friend pulls out the student handbook and asked where it said he couldn’t wear it. VP flips for a while and ends up showing him the, “…or anything the adminstration seems disruptive,” clause. Friend rolls his eyes but takes off his coat.

The next day, friend comes in with the same tweed sport coat the VP wore every day.”—banjolier

7. One Kid Broke the Rules in Technicolor

Creative and tasteful, TBH.

“After the columbine shooting, our school banned black trench coats.

For the most part, nobody cared, except the mysteriously gothic “trench coat kid.” He had worn a trademark black trench coat every single day because it made him different, and then all of a sudden the school tells him he can’t do that anymore.

So the kid went out of his way to find (or make) different colored trench coats and wore those instead. My favorite one was covered in duct tape.

TLDR; Gothic Joseph and the technicolor trench coat.“—NeedsMoreTuba

6. Well, This Kid Really Tried

We want pictures!

“I was at a private school that had rules about the length of boys hair. One guy in particular always ignored the rule and the administration would tell him to get a hair cut every so often, but he never did. Eventually when his hair got about down to his shoulders the principal pulled him aside and told him his hair was twice the allowed length and by next week it needed to be shortened by half.

Monday rolls around and he comes in with half his head shaved, and the other side as long as ever. We were impressed by literal interpretation of the principal’s request, but it still ended up with him getting a suspension for a week and he had to shave the other side before he could come back.”—Link-to-the-Pastiche

5. Purses for All!

Those who rebel together stay friends forever.

“Just after the Virginia tech shooting, when I was in high school, the administration banned backpacks/messenger bags. Purses were ok though. One guy shows up to school with a purse. They suspended him for two days. The next day, most of the guys showed up with purses carrying all of their things. They lifted the backpack ban.

Edit: looks like it wasn’t just my school either.”—Thesecondcomingof

4. This Adorable Food Fight

In the strictest sense.

“Last day of senior year, we started a food fight at lunch. And by food fight, I mean we drew angry faces on an orange and an apple, then faced them toward each other, made a big circle around them, and we all reacted like we were watching a fight. All the security guards ran to break up the fight, only to make their way to the middle of the circle to find two pieces of fruit sitting on the ground.”—the-bryman

3. A Rebellious Protest and Proof

These kids are organized!

“Halloween costumes were banned at my high school because of some idiots like 10 years before that dressed up and used it as an excuse to hide their face while they vandalized the school.

My senior year more than half of the class decided that we would still dress up and march into the school together in the morning. We all knew we would be punished right away, but it didn’t matter. I stayed up all night making a suit of armor out of metallic duct tape and carboard, along with a broomstick horse to ride. Here is a picture that ended up in the yearbook

The next day we all gathered in the parking and waited for everone to show up. People went all out and there were a lot of amazing costumes, and after about 20 minutes of waiting we started our march in. The deans had learned of our plan and were waiting for us right as we entered. They started pulling people aside in groups and taking student IDs to hand out detentions.

In my group there was one guy dressed up as an ATM and when the dean asked for his ID he started making ATM noises and then slipped the ID out through the slot where you would put your debit card in. It was one of the funniest things and I was so jealous that my costume was not as clever as his. Even though having so many of us participate was pretty awesome, his costume just made that whole event for me.”—-eDgAR-

2. It Was the Principle That Mattered

This student rebelled by getting into their dream school!

“Friend was told in high school by his guidance counselor not to waste his time applying to his dream school because he wouldn’t get in. He got pissed off and went to the principal, who told him it was the counselor’s job to give her best opinion, so he trusts whatever she says. He applied anyways, and got in. He took the acceptance letter, made a copy, and taped them to both the principal and counselor’s door with “thanks for nothing!” written on both. He didn’t even go to that school, he couldn’t afford it, but it was the principle of the matter.”—dirtybirds233

1. This Kid Gamed the System

This is wrong, but clever.

“When I was in high school, there was a rule implemented that if you showed up late to school, you had to go to the front office to get a detention slip. You would then have to give it to the teacher for that period, who would then mark it down, and you were required to go to lunch detention for that day.

I figured out by the third slip that literally no one cared: teachers, security, or students. So when I was subsequently late for the rest of the year, I would take out an old slip that I had from a previous detention, walk through school, give it to my teacher to mark down, then take it back to “give to the lunch detention supervisor”. But I never went to detention because the front office didn’t have record of me being late.

I was late no less than 50 times my senior year, only having been reprimanded the initial three times. I even told my parents about it after I had graduated and even they agreed it was dumb and funny.”—AnEnigma1

There you have it! You have to admit that some of these rebellious methods are quite clever. Did you ever creatively break a rule when you were a student? Go ahead and share your story in the comments, you can’t get detention for it now.

The post People Share Funny Stories About Breaking School Rules appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share Things Ex-Friends Did That Ended Their Relationships

Sometimes, toxic people in your life just have to be CUT OUT. It may seem harsh and it may seem drastic, but it’ll be much better in the long run if you actually go through with it.

Hey, life is short. Don’t spend it with people who aren’t good to you.

AskReddit users opened up with these interesting responses.

1. My first boyfriend…

“I was 16 and had my first boyfriend. I confided in my best friend of a decade that I was really upset because he got annoyed at something I said at Baskin Robins and threw me against a table and then down on the floor, and that it wasn’t the first time he’d shoved me around.

She told me that she didn’t want to hear it and that I had no right to complain because unlike her, at least I had a boyfriend.

That was pretty much that for our friendship.”

2. Obsessed with her boyfriend.

“She said that relationships were more important than school as a reason for refusing to help on a group project.

She was obsessed with her new boyfriend and didn’t want to do anything else.

We sent the emails to our physics teacher and she got put into her own group.”

3. They deserve each other.

“After I spent all day using my truck and trailer helping him haul tables and chairs and a giant archway to the church for his wedding that i was suppose to be a groomsmen.

Him “Hey dude, I really appreciate you helping me move this stuff, I couldn’t get anyone else to help, here’s $20 for the gas”

Me “woah dude, I’m IN your wedding, I don’t need money to help make this happen”

Him- “yeah dude so hey, brent (his soon-to-be wifes best guy friend/100% ex f*ck buddy/guy he’s known for less than 3 months), really wanted to be in the wedding and i was wondering if it would be cool if he took your spot and i can see if any of her cousins backed out and if there’s a seat open somewhere”

This was the day before the wedding.

I had been best friends with that guy since kindergarten, his wife didn’t like me because I knew about her wild past from a different circle of friends so this was her attempt to push me out.

He caved but none of the other people involved would help move sh*t so he waited until last minute to get me to help.

Haven’t spoken to that guy since. They deserve each other.”

4. That’s pretty bad.

“In college, a former friend tried to have sex with me (I’m also a guy) while I was black out drunk (He was not drunk).

He did that despite knowing I am straight and had a girlfriend at the time.

Lucky for me there were some actual friends that stopped him.”

5. Ruined our friendship.

“My best mate’s now ex girlfriend told everyone I had sex with her while they were dating, when I definitely had not.

She was the most irritating person I’d ever met and I don’t know if I’ve ever been attracted to someone less, than I was to her.

Ruined our friendship and destroyed her relationship with my mate.

She is one of those people that CRAVE drama and can’t live without having something wrong to moan about. She’s currently pretending to have multiple personality disorder and blaming that for every time she’s a dickhead so she can get away with it.”

6. Terrible situation.

“I got sexually assaulted by two guys in a summer camp and told it to my best friend. After calling me stupid for letting that happen, she apologised and I forgave her.

Then I saw her parents who asked how summer camp went and all she did was turn to me and go “well, you made many friends, didn’t you ? Don’t you wanna tell my parents about it ?” with a big smile on her face. I don’t feel too bad about thinking that she can f*ck off in hell.”

7. Get rid of all of ’em.

“Had a whole bunch do it at once. I used to have a group of people I thought were my friends. Because of this, I did a lot for them. I helped them out by working on their projects, supported them, let one stay in my home rent free when they were in danger of becoming homeless.

I did all that for these people, but two years in a row, they couldn’t be bothered to do something as simple and easy as meet up with me for drinks to celebrate my birthday. Half of them didn’t even bother responding to being invited. I’ve pretty much cut them all out my life now, I’m done being used by those who don’t care about me.”

8. Broke something in me.

“You know what, recently, like late 2019 I started getting out of the house. I’m a single father of two girls and I’ve focused on them 1000% for a really long time. I finally got out of the house a few times, and I’m serious I went to this friends house a few times for game nights… basically drinking and cards. Till this dude hauled off and hit me for accidentally touching his f*cking hat of all things.

What struck me most is that they were hosting and didn’t even offer an apology to me. It was quite insane for me. It was like I was back in highschool. Unf*cking real. I gave them ample time to f*cking realize what happened. It took the person 3 months to even realize we are no longer friends on social media and she’s trying to add me back now…. and honestly, it f*cking broke something in me.”

9. Good riddance to you.

“After convincing me to delete my accounts everywhere and make new ones. After promising me that they’ll protect me from my abusive ex. After witnessing everything my ex done to me, and how it scarred me for life, I found out that my best friend was dating my ex behind my back for months, lying about it the whole time.

I didn’t know who my friend was dating, as they refused to introduce them in person. It turns out they’ve been dating behind my back a few weeks before my ex broke up with me. The whole thing scarred me to this day. It’s been a year and I haven’t heard from either of them since, though. Good riddance.”

10. Set up and robbed.

“One of my best friends of several years set me up to get robbed for £390, my wallet and my jacket. The guy who robbed me pulled a machete on me and kept it against my neck. I don’t really know why they decided they want to do it, but I know from enough people (and just the way it all happened gave me suspicions) telling me it was him that I found out.

So naturally I stopped being friends with him, because it was a bit of a dick move and all.”

11. Went and told everyone.

“Best friend and ex-coworker for 5 years.

Confided in her and told her about my self harming, depression and stuff I went through as a child (you can imagine), two days later she not only told the whole of my old work place but told my family too.

Absolutely heart breaking.”

12. Never spoke again.

“I have chronic health issues, and my best friend was trying to get me to drive 30 minutes to her house to go swimming when I had to pack to leave town the next day. She kept pushing and pushing, but when she finally realized I wasn’t going to agree, she sat back and said, “You wouldn’t be any fun even if you HAD your health.”

I left and didn’t speak to her again.”

13. What a creep.

“My former best friend of over 6 years, hit up my ex girlfriend the day we broke up. He sent her a DM asking if she wanted to “hangout at his house” (parents but wtv). At the time he also had a girlfriend, who was pregnant with his kid. My ex hit me and his girlfriend up with the messages.

My ex and his girlfriend decided to go together at his place and expose him. I didn’t want to do with any of that but I didn’t want anything to happen to either of the girls. So we show up, his mom greets us and let’s us in, as soon as he saw us 3 he knew that his shit was up but acted all surprised. We told him we knew, he kept defending his case by saying his little brother (who was fucking 6) sent my ex those messages.

Well to make a long story short, his pregnant girlfriend left him, he’s currently paying child support, he also moved out of the state like a month later. My ex and I are back together and 3 months into our marriage.”

14. A story from the other side.

“I’m the dumped friend.

She posted a video from The Onion of a fake Senator reading a fake bill that was all redacted and you could tell with context clues it was basically saying in the event of Armageddon, the high powered people have bunkers to hide in. She made some comment about the redacting and our government is hiding stuff.

I commented that it was a satire video and not real. She got super mad and accused me of trying to make her look stupid. She said there was no way she could’ve known.

“The Onion” was in the bottom right hand corner of the video.

She blocked me and we have never spoken since.

We had known each other for at least five years. I (more accurately, my parents) took her in when she ran away from home for, like, a year when we were teens. When her husband beat her up (early 20s) I road tripped all night to pick her back and move her back in.”

I’ve had to cut friends out of my life at different points just because I knew they were no good for me.

Have you ever had to do that?

Tell us about it in the comments!

The post People Share Things Ex-Friends Did That Ended Their Relationships appeared first on UberFacts.

15 People Share the Biggest Mistakes They’ve Made in Life

All of us have regrets and things we wish we would’ve done differently in our lives. Some are more extreme than others, but, as the saying goes, “That’s life.”

In this AskReddit article, people went on the record and shared the biggest mistakes they’ve made in life…so far…

1. That’s not good.

“I tried to walk across a guard rail and ended up slipping and hitting my gooch in just the right spot that it tore my urethra. Had a catheter for about 3 months after that.”

2. Never be whole again…

“On my 16 birthday my much older brother killed himself. My regret is that I had called him to ask him to come out with my friends and I to celebrate at a local restaurant. But on the first ring thought “He probably doesn’t want to hang out with a bunch of 15-16 year olds” and hung up the phone. They found his body the next morning. I will never be whole again.”

3. Not happy with the choices.

“Choosing the wrong degree multiple times. A few years ago finally decided on Computer Science… and I fucking hate it. Only have like 8ish classes left so I would be stupid not to finish it but I have no desire to do anything computer science related.”

4. Debt for days.

“Quitting a job before I had another one (long story), which led to my savings being drained and my credit card debt soaring through the roof.

I’ve recovered about a year later, but my savings are basically non-existent as I spent all of my excess paying down debt.”

5. Still in therapy.

“Holding onto hate and resentment about my dad, has fucked up mentally. Instead of dealing with it in a healthy way, I’ve held onto the hate and resentment and have blamed him for everything wrong in my life. I’m in therapy now and trying to unlearn toxic behaviours.”

6. Just want to be functional.

“Tried to kill myself when I was 24. Did the whole inpatient thing and therapy. Now I’m 28, still living with my parents and struggling to win the battle with my mental health. Really frustrating. I just want to be a functional adult.”

7. That’s intense.

“Having a kid with wrong person. Really ends your life for the most part.”

8. A lot of people do this…

“Staying with someone for way too long because I thought I could help them.

I was 25 when I met her, she was broken and very needy. She had a lot of issues with herself, mainly she always felt insecure and inadequate. For those times when she was ok, everything was amazing and she was the best person to be around with. But those times were rare, she was jealous about anyone and everyone. I didn’t even hang around my friends anymore because she would make me feel guilty later on and she could never get along with them. I always thought I could help her, but only after everything fell apart did I realize that in my effort to always be there for her I broke myself.

We broke up 2 years ago, I’m now 33 and just starting to fix relationships that I’ve abandoned because I was too focused on her. I don’t blame her at all because that was my choice, but it’s been hard.”

9. Just let that go.

“Being scared of what people thought about me.”

10. You can quit!

“Starting to smoke.”

11. Now what?

“Being a floater. Meaning being friends with multiple friend groups in life without really being a solid part in any one. Left with none eventually.”

12. Still regret it.

“Probably dropping out of my dream college to be closer to my now ex.

Regret that decision every single day…”

13. Married to the wrong person.

“Getting married to the wrong person. It led to a lengthy divorce in which time my ex tanked me financially . It took me years to recover.”

14. This is very true.

“Losing friends because I didn’t put effort into maintaining the relationship. Nobody tells you when you’re a kid just how hard it is to make new friends once you’re past your college years.”

15. Say no to drugs.

“Took a very large dose of a research chemical thinking it’d be like acid, went clinically insane for like a year and require inpatient hospitalization. Took me two years after that to build my life up and have a career, but I was never totally the same. Such is life.”

Wow…some of those are pretty rough…

What do you think is the worst mistake you’ve made in your life so far?

Feel free to share with us in the comments. We’d love to hear from you. No judgment here!

The post 15 People Share the Biggest Mistakes They’ve Made in Life appeared first on UberFacts.

People Discuss What Makes Them Immediately Lose Romantic Interest in Someone

You’ve probably been here before: you’re talking to someone or maybe you’re on a first date, things seem to be going just fine and then, BOOM…they say or do something that immediately makes you lose interest.

You know what I’m talking about, right?

AskReddit users shared the things that make them immediately lose interest in a person…let’s take a look.

1. So, back to me…

“When you come to them with a problem and they turn it into a conversation about them.”

2. Pity party.

“If they constantly make you feel bad for them. Felt so bad and was so worried about him for so long that the one time I needed the emotion I couldn’t have it.”

3. Take it down a notch.

“When they don’t know the difference between being funny and being obnoxious.”

4. I’ll take your word for it.

“If they say the words “I know I’m an asshole/bitch”. Like okay I’ll take your word for it. Also if it becomes apparent that they have no self-awareness.”

5. Forget the haters.

“They enjoy putting other people and their hobbies down.”

6. I’m back!

“Ghosting you then suddenly popping up out of the blue when they want attention. Yes Brittany I know what is happening when you call me, you’re scraping the bottom of the barrel and I resent the fuck out of being the bottom (wait that could mean another thing but you know the thing I mean.)”

7. Lack of situational awareness.

“Don’t know how to act in public/ are unaware of feelings other than their own.”

8. Who is the real problem here?

“If ALL of their exes were “toxic” or “crazy”

We all have one or two bad ones, but seriously it’s not ALWAYS that.”

9. That’s gross.

“Doing dumb things and should know better. We had a new guy join our Friday social group. Very nice guy. Attractive. At the bar, he took his old gum out of his mouth and stuck it to the bottom of the table. Really? So trashy.”

10. Definitely not cool.

“Selfishness. I am very considerate of others and I am slowly learning that I think I need someone that is too.”

11. Gimme something!

“When they have seemingly no opinion, no voice. When every answer is “I don’t care” or “I don’t know.” Like Jesus Christ I’m trying to find out what you like so that we can talk. Gimme something!”

12. Sounds pretty classy.

“Chewing tobacco. I’m also not a fan of smoking, but it’s not necessarily an instant deal breaker like chewing tobacco is. The truth is, I have seen too many men who would sit there and chew tobacco and then spit it into an empty Dr. Pepper bottle, and it grosses me out more than I can express.”

13. Let’s not meet again.

“Went out with a guy once who talked 90% of the time, 85% of that being about how much money he had made, how much he spent on his now ex wife, all the nice cars he had… I picked HIM up because he didn’t have a ride to meet up. He was legitimately confused why I didn’t want to spend the night with him when I went to drop his ass off. Never saw him ever again.”

14. This! Yes!

“Being rude to customer service people.”

15. Ugh! Run for the hills!

“If they say I love you on the first date. Creepy AF.”

I had a feeling these responses would be pretty enlightening.

Now it’s your turn! What immediately turns you off from a person?

Tell us about it in the comments!

The post People Discuss What Makes Them Immediately Lose Romantic Interest in Someone appeared first on UberFacts.