15 Hilarious Photos of Cats High on Catnip

These pictures, taken by photographer Andrew Martilla, are so much fun, and they’ll kind of sort of make you want to say “I’ll have what that kitty is having.”

Maybe that’s just me, but maybe not… Take a look!

#15.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#14.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#13.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#12.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#11.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#10.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#9.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#8.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#7.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#6.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#5.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#4.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#3.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#2.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#1.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

The post 15 Hilarious Photos of Cats High on Catnip appeared first on UberFacts.

15 Hilarious Photos of Cats High on Catnip

These pictures, taken by photographer Andrew Martilla, are so much fun, and they’ll kind of sort of make you want to say “I’ll have what that kitty is having.”

Maybe that’s just me, but maybe not… Take a look!

#15.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#14.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#13.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#12.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#11.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#10.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#9.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#8.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#7.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#6.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#5.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#4.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#3.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#2.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

#1.

Photo Credit: Andrew Marttila

The post 15 Hilarious Photos of Cats High on Catnip appeared first on UberFacts.

12 People Reveal Why They’re Still Single

It’s one thing to ask your friends or family why they think you’re still single, and quite another to self-assess. These 12 people took a frank look in the mirror and share with the world the truth (in their eyes) about why they haven’t found that special someone.

#12. Wine and takeaway pizza

“I really can’t be bothered to put myself out there. I’m a lazy fuck and I’d much rather laze around with friends than go out and meet people. I’m a hopeless romantic at heart, but I’m also a hedonist who likes lounging in pyjamas in my bed. Give me wine and takeaway pizza any day.”

#11. A hard truth

“Because even though one is the loneliest number, two can be bad as one.”

#10. It must be

“Probably I am just too handsome and nobody dare to approach, yes it must be.”

#9. But with a nice vocabulary

“I’m a boring & misanthropic hermit with a lot of trust issues and self loathing.”

#8. Because, people

“Because I hate people and finding someone to date is a pain in the ass.”

#7. The grind

“When you work 60 to 70 hours a week you don’t have time to talk to anyone.”

#6. Peace and quiet

“I’m introverted, self conscious, and I love peace and quiet, so I just don’t seek relationships. Also, the world is populated enough already.”

#5. Everyone has their thing

“My personality is as attractive as a turd.”

#4. Because of the kids

“I was widowed when my kids were 5, 9, 11 and 13. They came first in my life. Now that they’re grown and successful, I’m too set in my ways and comfortable on my own.”

#3. One is the happiest number

“Honestly, I don’t want a partner. People never believe me when I say it, but it really is true.

I was in a relationship for years, and I was depressed. At the time I didn’t realise what the problem was, but then when it ended (and after a period of not knowing what to do with myself) I became happier than I’d ever been.

I’ve been in a couple of short-lived relationships since, and they were fine, but I still wasn’t as happy as when I was single, so I had to end them.

I think the whole “You MUST find the person of your dreams otherwise you will be SAD and LONELY” is complete bullshit.

There are other things in life. Hobbies. Friendship. Family.

I do want children at some point though, so I may run into trouble there…”

#2. A sausage fest

“I’m a guy in an industry that is all guys. All my friends and friends of friends are married. It’s a real challenge to meet any women when your life is an endless sausage fest and no one you know is single.”

#1. Never settle

“I decided I’d rather have no relationship at all than one that doesn’t fit quite right.”

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Restaurants Have Hilariously Savage Reactions to IHOP Becoming IHOb

I mean, I don’t know how you could have missed the hilariously stupid announcement that the International House of Pancakes (IHOP) is about to become the International House of Burgers (IHOB). And it turns out that the general public aren’t the only ones keen to ridicule the former pancake chain on the change of fare…the people who run the Twitter accounts of several other restaurant chains also had thoughts.

Hilarious thoughts.

Burger King

Photo Credit: Facebook

Whataburger

Photo Credit: Facebook

Waffle House

Photo Credit: Facebook

Red Robin

Photo Credit: Facebook

White Castle

Photo Credit: Facebook

Wendy’s

Photo Credit: Facebook

Chili’s

Photo Credit: Facebook

And even Netflix got in on the action…

Netflix

Photo Credit: Facebook

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15 People Reveal the Crazy Ways They Almost Died

Have you ever almost died? I’m not sure I have, unless you count the many times someone almost kills you (or the other way around) while you’re both behind the wheel of a car. But these 15 people have some pretty crazy stories…or maybe cautionary tales, depending on your point of view.

#15. The kindness of strangers

“Was walking along not paying attention like an idiot, and stepped out in front of a double-decker bus. The guy behind me grabbed the hood of my sweater and yanked me back, but I was close enough that the bus still smacked into and broke my ‘leading’ foot. If he hadn’t been there, or I wasn’t wearing a hoodie, or I was a bit heavier, that would have been my head.”

#14. Bad luck

“Was in a bad wreck with an 18 wheeler when I was 16. I was on the passenger side in the back seat and the car we were in got crushed when the trailor jack knifed and squished us between the truck and trailer. None of the first responders could believe nobody in our car was killed or even really hurt.

Then in 2015 I was pistol whipped in an armed robbery. It felt like the whole side of my head caved in when he hit me. I actually do have a dent in my skull from it

Edit: Holy wow at the upvotes. Also my phone shit the bed while replying to comments and posted several times but I’m enjoying seeing y’all repeat it so much not even gonna fix it lol.”

#13. Hard to believe

“Got my head stuck in a library book return slot.”

#12. Yay for vaccines

“When I was 5 or 6 I had chickenpox and meningitis which apparently could have gone either way.

Fast forward 10 years and I nearly feel a few hundred feet into a quarry. Because I was a stupid kid, I was sat on the edge when it gave way. I was just lucky that my friend reacted as quick as he did and grabbed me. Needless to say I didn’t get too close to the edge after that.”

#11. Not just a rash

“When I was about 12 years old, I was all ready to go to my Karate lessons with my brother. We were high belt grades so really into the contact side of it. I’d mentioned a rash to my dad, that he dismissed as heat rash. Before leaving I showed it to my mum who had just come in from work.

She thought it was meningitis and rushed me to the hospital after dropping my brother off for his lessons. Turns out it was a super rare blood disorder causing my body to attack the platelets, which are the clotting mechanism in the blood. Essentially, if I’d gone to the Karate lesson instead of talking to my mum, I could have caused some internal bleeding and died.”

#10. Teacher fail

“My maths teacher wouldnt open the window in our very stuffy classroom. This induced a asthma attack and she denied me going to the bathroom because she thought I was faking. 3 hours later I came round from an asthma attack, being told I was hanging by a thread.”

#9. In France

“When I was 8, I very nearly drowned in a swimming pool in France. I was playing on the divider between the deep and shallow areas – which was effectively a row of large boulders – and slipped between two of them, getting my leg firmly stuck (and badly cut up in the process). I was trapped, hanging upside down in the water, and unable to twist my leg at all.

The only sign that anything was happening on the surface was the very tip of my foot sticking out, mostly obscured by the boulders, so there wasn’t a good chance that anyone would spot anything unusual. I remember looking at all these upsidedown legs moving in the water and thinking “This is how I’m going to die. In France.” After what felt like an age, I vaguely remember seeing two big hairy legs move towards me, and next thing I knew I was forcefully yanked out of the water, with blood dripping into my eyes. The guy carried me to the side and made sure I was alright. No idea what would have happened if he hadn’t noticed.”

#8. Cause for concern

“Had a bad cough so I went to the doctor. He gave me a puffer (can’t remember what it was called) and when I went home I fell asleep.

Something woke me up from a dead sleep and when I sat up I started having a hard time breathing. I couldn’t talk at all so I had to write on a pad of paper to tell my boyfriend, now husband, to take me to the hospital.

I wrote down my symptoms for the triage nurse and she asked me if I could l talk I shook my head no but she made me try. I choked out an “ok” and she said I could talk and said I could go home since I’m just sick or I could wait.

I waited 4 hours in the waiting room and couldn’t get a great breath unless I was sipping water. It was getting frustrating watching people go in before me. I know a lot of them had good reason to be there but with how few people were actually there is was evident she kept me as the lowest priority.

When I finally went in I was feeling like death and even the few tests they did were like torture. The nurses and doctors in the actual ER were very nice and gentle but it still was awful at that point.

A short time after they were done the tests the doctor came in and said I was septic and I should have come in earlier. Any longer and my organs would have shut down and I would have died.

My boyfriend told him I had been in the waiting room for 4 hours and the doctor was pissed. I don’t know what happened to the triage lady but I hope she got in some kind of trouble. I know they have to deal with a lot but her bad day could have been a worse day for me and my family.

I was put on an antibiotic pump for a week but it took a couple weeks to feel like myself. The doctor said I could have easily stayed asleep and died at home so it was good I woke up.”

#7. All things considered

“I’m a paratrooper in the 82nd airborne division and had the (now rare) misfortune of suffering a static line injury. Essentially the cable that opens my chute is attached the top of my chute and the inside of the plane. Through bad luck i ended up with too much slack and it wrapped my arm. I bounced off of the outside of the plane and my parachute was too twisted to open properly. I ended up with a torn bicep and shattered shoulder blade. All things considered my injuries should’ve been way worse and i’m lucky to be alive.”

#6. A friend, indeed

“I was crossing the street once and there were large bushes at the corner of the sidewalk. A car took the turn incredibly fast, but my tall friend saw it a bit early and pulled me back. The car was an inch or two away from me.”

#5. Wear your helmet

“I was on my motorcycle as a six-car accident happened AROUND ME. I came around a curve on the interstate as one car hit the concert barrier and spun out into four lanes of traffic. Cars were spinning and rolling around me, and I was barely even dodging, it was like they were dodging me. I pulled off and as I was coming to a stop a semi came sliding sideways through the whole mess. I hit the throttle again and it smashed into the guardrail a meter or two behind me. It was like seriously like a car chase action movie, except it was all luck and not skill. The throttle punch at the end was the only thing that was on purpose.

Edit: just feel compelled to say wear your helmet and gear! Don’t be like this girl and wait for something like this to happen before you get religious about it.”

#4. A lucky break

“I had an accident while moving a big antique mirror by myself at home. It broke and half of it fell onto my neck. It severed my jugular vein and I came within a few minutes of bleeding to death. The paramedic who saved me said I lost about 2 litres of blood (a little over 4 pints) and I was extremely lucky to survive. Here is a picture of my stitches.”

#3. Childhood trauma

“I as born somewhat premature and my small intestine hadn’t fully hollowed out so I had to be airlifted to another hospital and have that section cut out. Still have a huge scar on my stomach from that.

Then in second grade I got chicken pox and ended up having viral encephalitis as a complication. One thing I remember was a woman visiting me in the hospital and I asked her name, and it was the same as my mom’s name so I told her that. Turns out it was my mom and I just didn’t recognize her at the time. I spent two weeks in the hospital with that.”

#2. Never fight the ocean

“The ocean vs me at 12.

Me and my sister loved doing this thing, were we would let ourselves get hit by large waves. The feeling of getting pulled in and slammed down as a kid was exhilarating. Well, one day, the ocean was unusually rough. The waves were gigantic and there were rip tides. My dad told us we can’t go in the ocean. But the waves were so huge, we had to give hit a try.

We snuck off. Sat in front of our impending doom. This 8-10 foot wave starts coming in. Takes all the water with it. When it began to crest, I got the “oh shit this is going to hurt” feeling but at this point it was too far to go back. It comes in picks me and my sister, slams me face first on the beach. Scratches the fuck out of my face and arms on the beach shells.

Most waves when they crash, there is very little water left on the beach. Yet, this one was so huge, it left a ton. enough that we were both strong swimmers, but the current still could pull us back into the next one. It did this 2-3 times. Until we were both either concussed or tired enough that we couldn’t fight back. The last one pulled us deep in the ocean.

We tried to swim toward the beach, but to no avail, we kept going further and further. But an old man, probably in his 60s spotted us. He swam up to us. But he only grabbed my sister. Begun to trek back to the beach.

So, I’m there. 12. Probably concussed, bleeding, very tried, just looking at the shore line, it gets so far, I can barely see the shoreline. Alone, am like okay, lol, fuck this is how I die.

Remember pondering my death, but I was too tired to do anything but just stay afloat.

After what seemed like an eternity, the old man swims back and finds me. Takes me to shore. Besides the ass beating, I got from my dad. I also was traumatized by the ocean. I probably didn’t go back in it for like 4 years. Even today, I’ll go. But its just uneasy feelings and definitely not going deeper than I can stand.”

#1. Thank goodness for modern medicine

“First two times I was rushed to the ER anaphylactic shock. I swear if my mom wasn’t beside the hospital bed crying the 1st time I would have let go.

Third time I was on a plane landing at the airport, but clearly flies around it a couple times. The captain comes on the speakers and informed us the wheels may not be locked/deployed. The landing way was lined all sorts of fire/EMS trucks. No problem with the landing, everyone cheered when we touched down. The captain said it was probably just a burnt out light.

I started having seizures in my late 20s, resulting in permanent partial blindness. I kind of brushed off the danger of seizures until I had one for more than a half hour. The neurologist explained that it’s really bad for your brain and I was lucky to still not be a brain dead vegetable, let alone alive.”

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A Random Cat Made This Guy a Dad and He’s so Not Mad About It

Some days, social media is a dumpster fire. Other days, it gives you stories like this one, in which Paris Zarcilla finds a strange (read: not his) cat that has given birth under his bed.

Photo Credit: Twitter

So, like any normal human, he promptly adjusted his expectations of the day.

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

And possibly his life.

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Fatherhood is life-changing, after all.

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit:Twitter

This would be the best day of anyone’s life, right?

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Updates: Paris realizes he may not be a dad forever. Tear.

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

But life brings both ups and downs….luckily, for Paris, he’s still on the up.

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Fingers crossed these little beauties have found their forever home!

The post A Random Cat Made This Guy a Dad and He’s so Not Mad About It appeared first on UberFacts.

15 People Regale Us with the Dumbest Questions They Were Ever Asked at Work

People ask dumb questions – I don’t care what the old adage says. And it seems as if some professions (largely in the arena of customer service) seem to lend themselves to more than the average.

These 15 people, however, really take the cake.

#15. That darn faulty wireless

“Long time ago now…
Got a call that a user’s laptop was dead and wouldn’t power on.
I go and check it out. Press the button, no life. Plug it into the power, it starts charging. Press the button, it boots just fine.
The user wasn’t plugging the laptop into power because she “thought we had wireless”

#14. That’s not how any of this works

“I used to work as a bank teller. A lady came up to me and asked to withdraw money. I informed her that she couldn’t withdraw money, because her account was overdrawn. She was immediately upset, so I had her account checked for fraud. She then explained that all those charges were hers and she wasn’t expecting any payments. She was spending money she knew she didn’t have.

She then asked me why we couldn’t just give her more money.”

#13. More light, please

“Can we open the curtains to make the screen brighter? (While pointing at a projector and screen setup.) She seriously thought that more light in the room would make everything brighter as if the projection was some sort of moving painting.”

#12. Potential time traveler

“C: How much is this?
Me: 50c, like the sticker says.
C: And this one?
Me: $1. All the items have labels on them with how much they cost.
C: Oh is that what those mean? That’s clever.

(Not the slightest bit of sarcasm in their voice. I pressed slightly and found they were genuinely unaware of price labels.)”

#11. Open it, please

“I used to work in computer sales and repairs. Had a customer come up who was maybe 23 years old saying she couldn’t get her laptop to open something. So I take it, and open it and casually ask, “What is it you cant get open?” She looks at me shocked as I open the laptop screen and tells, “I HAVE BEEN TRYING FOR HOURS TO GET IT TO OPEN HOWD YOU DO THAT??” I look at her not knowing how to respond and close it and open it again. She takes it and walks out saying thank you. I took a long look at my computer I was working on and decided that this was the moment that made me quit that job.”

#10. Password fail

“I get too many dumb questions to remember them all. Here’s a dumb encounter that happened just yesterday. When sending confidential documentation, we would encrypt it and put a password on it. It’s common practice to send the document and the password in two separate e-mails. I got a message from this guy saying he couldn’t open the document I sent him.

Me: “Did you use the password?”

Client: “Yes. It said there was an error.”

Me: “What password did you use?”

Client: “I just hit OK and it said that I had the wrong password.”

Me: “Wait.. so did you type anything in?”

Client: “Well no.”

Me: “Could you use the password that we provided you?”

Client: “I didn’t think it would work so I deleted the e-mail.”

Me: “….”

#9. The real world

“Selling paint. Woman wants to paint her fence. I give her advice and explain to her how to prepare the surface. She then asks:

“Do I need anything to apply the paint?”

I’m like “Yeah a roller or a brush…”

She’s like “Oh, I can just splash the paint on the fence?”

She was dead serious.

Woman, this is not Looney Tunes, this is the real world!”

#8. Ummm…

“A co-worker at a video store asked ‘Does this calculator do math?’”

#7. A Willy Wonka world

“I worked at Kinkos and on 3 separate occasions different people angrily asked me why I returned their faxed document to them. They thought that a fax machine was some kind of Willy Wonka thing that sent their original piece of paper to the recipient.”

#6. Get a real job

“While towing his car to a dealership, “So what do you do for a living?”

He was serious. He assumed I had another job because I didn’t fit the Billy Bob persona he associated with tow truck drivers.”

#5. You keep using that word…

“A group of four ladies sat on a table that is reserved for a group of regulars every day. Before I opened my mouth to let them know, one says ‘we see a reserved sign but we are unsure exactly how “reserved” it is?’”

#4. Nipples or ticks?

“Vet tech. A lot of people think their dog’s nipples are ticks. A lot. One man even pulled a “but he’s a boy!” on us.”

#3. A monumental job

“I work at a famous monument and I kid you not I’ve had people ask me whether we take it down at the end of each day, or whether it’s been rearranged since they last visited.”

#2. Because, physics

I used to work in a call centre for a large bank and a customer phoned while he was in one of the branches and said the queue was too big so he wanted me to help him. I asked what his query was and he said the ATM was broke so he had to withdraw cash. I asked how I could possibly help him withdraw cash from the bank over the phone and he said “Why can’t you just fax it to me?”

#1. A free bookstore

“Library. Once I checked out several books to a woman and told her the return date. She looked at her friend, then back at me, and said, shocked, “You mean I have to bring the books BACK?””

The post 15 People Regale Us with the Dumbest Questions They Were Ever Asked at Work appeared first on UberFacts.

This Woman’s Savvy Husband Saved Them Both from Moving into a Haunted House

You know the scene, and it’s straight out of a horror movie – a clueless white woman is wandering around a house exclaiming over cute built-ins and clawfoot tubs while ignoring the obvious signs of a demon infestation that will later ruin her life (and possibly steal her soul).

Well, it turns out in can happen in real life, too. At least, that’s the experience Louisville, KY author Olivia A. Cole had when she and her husband went to check out a house to rent.

While she was enamored with the “cute little bungalow,” her husband was properly suspicious and asking all the right questions…and getting none of the right answers.

Please, enjoy the entire thread below, and arm yourself with the truth.

Image Credit: Twitter

 

And in case you’re wondering…so was someone else.

Photo Credit: Twitter,CarrieCnh12

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This Twitter Thread About Gender Reveal Parties Is Funny No Matter Who You Are

Even if you’re someone who has participated in, organized, or asked for a gender reveal party, you have to admit that the whole idea can get a bit out of hand – not to mention that it doesn’t really matter all that much which sex your baby is going to be, not in the long run. I mean…we’re going to keep them either way, right?

One woman on Twitter got to the heart of the matter with a single tweet, and the ensuing thread is downright hilarious (as long as you have a sense of humor).

In addition, it provides a little food for thought for those of us who are concerned about eschewing gender stereotypes for this generation (and ones to come).

Here’s the tweet that started it all….

Photo Credit: Twitter,ChurchCarlton

And some of my favorite responses!

Photo Credit: Twitter,vanetti

Photo Credit: Twitter,thezebramermaid

Photo Credit: Twitter,sldancakes

Photo Credit: Twitter,MissZindzi

Photo Credit: Twitter,ChurchCarlton

Photo Credit: Twitter,oliviasolon

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This Tale of an Office Lunch Theft Will Have You on the Edge of Your Seat

Rule Number 1 when working in an office: DO NOT MESS WITH PEOPLE’S LUNCHES.

Photo Credit: Flickr,Gabriel Saldana

Comedian Zak Toscani tweeted out a suspenseful story of an office lunch caper, and the results are pretty hilarious. Keep in mind Toscani is a comedian so there’s been no actual verification that this story is true…but let’s all hope someone wouldn’t joke about such a serious matter. Here’s how it all started…

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

HR had to step in to remind everyone of the most important code of honor in any office.

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

Then the perpetrator appeared…

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

And she did the unthinkable…she acted like she didn’t steal the shrimp fried rice.

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

Things began to escalate.

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

Toscani decided to up the ante.

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

Others on Twitter were mesmerized by the story and decided to share their own tales of lunch theft.

Photo Credit: Twitter,svershbow

Photo Credit: Twitter,svershbow

Photo Credit: Twitter,Delavegalaw

Photo Credit: Twitter,leewah

And Toscani added his final thoughts on the matter.

Photo Credit: Twitter,zaktoscani

There are some sick people in this world…

h/t: Mashable

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