I have a feeling that the shutdown we’re still dealing with during the pandemic has affected married couples one of two ways.
They’re either falling in love all over again and rediscovering that spark that brought them together in the first place…OR they’re ready to pack their bags and head for the hills because they can’t stand the sight of the other person much longer.
Good times!
Let’s hope more people are experiencing the former situation instead of the latter, but you have to admit that this past year has been rough on everyone, including married folks.
But forget about all that for a few minutes and enjoy these funny tweets about livin’ that married life.
1. It’s my turn to go!
Things are getting ugly…
Cabin fever has gotten so bad that my husband and I just argued over who would get to pick up a prescription from the drive-thru pharmacy
— SpacedMom (@copymama) January 1, 2021
2. That’s a good thing!
It’s bringing you closer together.
My husband and I usually spend Friday nights in bed eating pizza and criticizing other couples on television.
— Jawbreaker (@sixfootcandy) January 8, 2021
3. You guys are wild and crazy.
Tell us your secrets about how to keep it HOT.
My husband keeps debating whether to use his Christmas Amazon gift card on a food processor or an Instant Pot, in case you wondered how thrilling your 40s are.
— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) January 5, 2021
4. You’re right about that one.
Come up with a new name!
The gayest thing about my husband is that he calls his workout clothes "exercise outfits."
— Eli McCann (@EliMcCann) December 29, 2020
5. That’s gonna go over well.
Please remember to record her reaction for us.
My wife asked if I got everything at the store, I told her no just what wasn't on the list.
— Forward March (@RunOldMan) January 3, 2021
6. Oh, NOW you’re interested?
Isn’t this always the way?
Husband: What are you watching?
Me: *names any show* wanna watch?
Husband: Ugh, no thanks.
*plot twist on show*
Husband from other room: OMG WHAT?!?
— ThisOneSays (@ThisOneSayz) January 10, 2021
7. Tell me what’s really going on here…
This just doesn’t feel right…
Husband: Why are you in such a bad mood?
Me: What makes you think I am?
Husband: You don’t have a single candle lit.
— Darlin’ Darla (@Darlainky) January 7, 2021
8. Honey…it’s me again…
Yes, I need the correct measurements again…
I think I'm independent until I have to text my wife because I forget what size jeans I wear.
— Dan Regan (@Social_Mime) January 4, 2021
9. Does this look familiar?
Oh…whatever…
Me: What do you want for dinner?
Wife: Whatever.
Me: Pizza?
Wife: No.
Me: Chinese?
Wife: No.
Me: Italian?
Wife: No.
Me: [lists every other food known to man]
Wife: No.
Me: OMG what do you want?
Wife: Whatever.— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) January 8, 2021
10. Sounds like a blast.
At least make him clean the garage.
Husband was feeling burned out at work, so he's taking a few days off to feel burned out at home instead.
— Laura Marie (@lmegordon) December 30, 2020
11. Hey, it worked!
That’s the way to get things done.
Me staring out the window drinking scotch: I can't talk to you right now
Wife holding monopoly piece: jesus fine you can be the top hat
— Jon (@ArfMeasures) December 31, 2020
12. Totally off the charts.
This guy knows what he’s doing. No doubt about it.
My husband said to my kids “What if you had a teacher whose last name was Issippi?” and his Dad joke meter exploded.
— SpacedMom (@copymama) January 8, 2021
13. Listen to my knees, please.
We all get to this point eventually.
Reaching the stage of life where my wife and I ask each other to listen to our knees.
"When I move it like this, does it sound like club soda to you?"
— jess salomon (@jess_salomon) January 2, 2021
Okay, folks, it’s time to spill the beans…
How’s your marriage going these days?
Are you and your significant other at each others’ throats or are things pretty hunky-dory?
Talk to us in the comments!
The post Funny Tweets About Married Life That Might Look Familiar appeared first on UberFacts.