Ex-Convicts Discuss the Hardest Habits to Break Once They’re Back on the Outside

Surviving life in prison requires a person to adapt – at least, you have to somewhat if you’re going to survive and emerge as some semblance of the person you were when you went in.

On the flip side, when you’re set to get out of prison, I imagine it could be tough to readjust, and to drop the habits that got you through behind bars.

If you’re curious what the hardest habits were to drop once released from prison, these 14 ex-convicts are here to share.

14. This sounds awful.

Hoard feminine hygiene products. We were super limited on the number of pads or tampons they gave us. They didn’t give any to the women in holding cells.

There was dried and fresh menstrual blood on the floor and concrete benches, and a drain in the middle of the rooms like they intended to hose down the room, but if they did it was not often enough.

13. All of the choices.

Not me personally but I know a guy that said after he got out he just wanted McDonald’s.

When he got there he spent 20 minutes staring at the menu trying to decide what to order because he wasn’t used to having choices.

12. I never would have thought.

I didn’t use a fork for a few weeks. Ate everything with a spoon without thinking. It’s not the most interesting thing but I hadn’t noticed it posted here.

11. No need to defend yourself.

Staring at sharp things. Like there’s no desire to use them inappropriately but you are just kinda shocked they’re there and available for use.

You might be surprised what qualifies as a sharp object. I remember whenever someone tried to hand me a knife or something to cut veggies Id be afraid to touch it.

Glass was the biggest thing though, just mirrors in all the bathrooms. real ones. I could smash that shit and have a big jagged weapon, i cant believe this italian restaurant has such a dangerous thing in their bathroom. stopping thinking of objects as weapons is hard

10. Find your optimism.

Constantly looking over my shoulder. By far the hardest conditioning to break, which I haven’t and doubt I ever will, is the constant pessimism and cautious optimism. You see, when you’re waiting to work your way through court, get a deal, and get sentenced, you will have your dates changed 50 times, hope for certain things only to be disappointed, and any time you are told something hopeful it doesn’t work out.

As a result, I never get excited for something until it actually happens. When my wife told me we were pregnant (I already knew from her symptoms that she was but still, you never know for sure till you take the test), I was obviously happy, but because I’m always cautiously optimistic and rarely show emotion, I couldn’t feel comfortable or excited until I knew that my developing daughter was healthy. Even then, it didn’t really hit me till she was born.

You can apply this to anything especially big events. Getting engaged, planning the wedding, buying a house, ANYTHING. I still hear from my wife how i wasn’t crazy surprised or excited to be having a kid. I was, I actually was the half of the relationship who was dead set on a kid when my wife supposedly could’ve gone either way.

You just can’t get your hopes up or look forward to anything until it is here or has happened. I’ve been home over 7 years now and with my wife for 6.5. She’s truly the catalyst that motivated me to truly change my life and to not give any more of my life to the system, but she’ll never know how happy she makes me because she misinterprets my cautious optimism/realism for pessimism or indifference.

9. Not eating like an animal.

One of my foster sons came to us from juvie. Every meal his arm was around his plate and he woofed down his food. My mastiff couldn’t keep up. He always ate back to the wall hunched. Took my wife and I a month to show him no one would take his food and we had plenty more.

Funny part is he went in the Marines and did 8 years got out honorable and is now working in corrections.

8. Don’t save it for later.

I had to completely change my sense of time. I agree with all the people who said they ate super fast, but then we would slow walk back from the chow hall- any excuse for a few minutes more outside.

I made sure I never consolidated enjoyable things. If I had a snack- I ate it and concentrated on it. If there was something good on TV, I watched it. Now, I’ll snack while I watch a movie because there aren’t enough hours in the day- but on the inside I was trying to make hours and days go away.

I’ve got a good job now, and nice respectable friends, but I still react to confrontational situations more quickly, decisively and… efficiently than they do. I’m able to pull back at the last minute, but it’s pretty clear that violence is not a tool in their arsenal.

7. Hard to imagine.

Taking a sh%t with my underwear up to my thighs to hide my junk.

It took a long time to go back to pants around the ankles.

I forgot it wasn’t normal until my girlfriend pointed it out.

6. A luxury, for sure.

Taking as long as you want in the shower.

For the longest time after I got out, I took less than 5 minute showers.

My friend did two and a half in Florida State Prison.

Said the first thing he did when he got home was shower until all the hot water ran out.

5. A short list.

Not wearing shoes in the shower.

Eating with forks and knives.

Having salt and pepper for food.

Not always having to watch your back.

Being able to get food when you want it, and just get up and leave to go for a drive or something.

4. You can just do it.

I spent 72 months in prison for a tragic car accident that I had caused.

After I was released I kept telling my wife exactly what I was doing without her asking.

She thought it was funny at first but after a few weeks of it she was starting to get bothered.

3. As good as cash.

I don’t smoke, but every time someone offered me a cig I would pocket it.

On the inside thats a bartering chip, took me about a month or two to break

2. It was too quiet.

Not an ex con but my step dad has been in and out of prison for the majority of his life, he always said that whenever he gets out of prison you’re so use to to it being loud all the time that when he got home he couldn’t sleep because it was so quiet.

1. A laundry list.

I eat fast.

I don’t sit with my back to the door in public.

I always scan crowds constantly.

I question WHY people are nice to me.

I carry extra clothes, water, and various other things in my car in case I need it. (Not a hoarder but harder to get rid of stuff)

I don’t like being away from home overnight.

I also quit eating boiled eggs, I over season my food, and I refuse to drink Kool-Aid anymore.

I don’t know why life in prison is so fascinating to outsiders, but it definitely is.

If you’ve got firsthand knowledge, tell us in the comments what you would add to this list!

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