There’s something really wonderful, thrilling even, when you subvert the expectations of others and remind them of your own power and authority.
Let’s face it – in the working world (and certainly elsewhere) there are people who will attempt to trod all over you. It is ultimately up to you to advocate and assert yourself.
And sometimes it helps to teach those other people a lesson, too. You know… so they don’t act so foolish again.
We heard people share their stories about power differentials after Redditor sormatador asked the online community:
“What was the best ‘you have no power here’ moment you have ever seen?”
“The first time I had dinner…”
“The first time I had dinner at my parents house after I got my own apartment. My dad was giving me grief as usual. Finally, I stood up and said, ‘I don’t live here anymore. I don’t have to put up with you this way any longer. I’m going home.’”
“And walked out. Most liberating moment of my life.” ~ sunshine2632
“I told my ex…”
“I told my ex I was getting remarried. He told me he was going to stop me and put a lien on my house (which I bought with my money six years after the divorce). My son would come home from visitations telling me how his dad was going to stop the wedding and I’d have to pay him all of this money, la di da.”
“Get to court. His attorney goes blah blah blah for what felt like forever. My lawyer (yes, I had to freaking get one) stands up and simply hands the judge the divorce papers showing the disbursement of funds and how my ex isn’t owed anything.”
“Judge looks at ex’s lawyer and basically asks, ‘Did you even ask for this document before filing?’ and dismisses the case.” ~ NeverCallMeFifi
“So my biological grandmother…”
“Not me, but a story my dad used to tell me all the time.”
“So my biological grandmother was very emotionally abusive. She was very controlling and tried to keep people within her sphere of influence. There’s a reason why my grandfather divorced her.”
“In high school my dad had a job washing airplanes at an airport in our area, which he absolutely loved (he’s a huge fan of aircraft in general). He had classes until roughly 10 a.m. and then he’d be off to work until around 10 p.m. (it was what he loved, he didn’t mind long hours being around aircraft all day).”
“But one day he came home a little too late for his mom’s liking. She said she’d take his keys to his motorcycle and that he’d lost privileges to it. The fact of the matter is that he bought the motorcycle himself and he needed it to get to school as well as work.”
“He laughed in her face and she didn’t do anything. She couldn’t do anything.” ~ ITriedMyBestMan
“My boss calling me…”
“My boss calling me at 7 a.m. on a Saturday to ask if I could lay some flooring for a friend of his at nearly half my normal rate. Yeah, hard pass Andy.” ~ CapuccinoBoy
“This is a bit silly…”
“This is a bit silly, but gave me a great feeling of satisfaction.”
“Due to the bad economy and poor money management, my parents have moved into the spare room of the house my husband and I bought a year ago. Things are mostly smooth, tho I’m not the closest to them for several reasons I won’t go into here.”
“The other evening I was out gardening (because it’s hot during the day and we have the luck of having a streetlight right next to our front yard, keeping it pretty well illuminated even after sundown as I mostly garden at night), and I thought I had gotten the hose twisted, as it kept getting stuck.”
“This went on for a bit until I realized that it wasn’t stuck, but being pulled. I looked into the dim area just past the illumination of the street light and spied my father, crouched over and tugging the hose. Well I did the only reasonable thing to do, and I sprayed him.”
“He yelled and ran inside with me chasing. Once he got inside he made a face and goes, ‘You can’t get me now! I’m inside!!’ in that father-to-daughter-don’t-you-make-a-mess tone of voice.”
“I readied my hose, looked him in the eye and said, ‘It’s my house,’ and just let loose with the hose. He was soaked. Worth cleaning up the mess for that moment of true fear in his eyes.” ~ pumpkinspicepiggy
“A couple of days ago…”
“I grew up with my parents having screaming arguments over every little thing (they do love each other – over 50 years of marriage so far testifies to that) and it always upset me.”
“A couple of days ago, they popped into my house to visit for a coffee on their way to stay with friends a few miles away. Within minutes, they were yelling at each other.”
“I took great pleasure in telling them that I would not stand for such behaviour in MY house and, if they didn’t lower their voices, they could stand outside until they learned some manners. The meek apologies tasted so sweet. As did the coffee.” ~ Mangosta007
“Bye, Felicia.”
“I once had a boss try to discipline me (three months later I may add) for my behaviour as it was noted I was ‘rude to her’ by several of the group’s CEOs in a board meeting.”
“On the disciplinary forms, you both have to write your version of the events and it goes to HR for an adjudication. She did her part and I casually filled in something to the effect of ‘Manager continually pressured me into deleting files from our client management system prior to a regulatory audit which is against the ethical code of our profession and not aligned with my moral standards, I accept I was short with her but she was trying to force me into performing an illegal activity.’”
“I watched her collect up the paper and the colour drained from her face. I never did hear from HR. She got fired not long after when I casually mentioned to the CEO in a bar if she remembered the encounter and explained why I may have appeared a little frustrated and upset. Bye Felicia.” ~Noknox87
“He drives me home…”
“The guy that I’d gone on a few dates with introduced me to his parents, things went well, or so i thought. He drives me home, we end up talking and drinking a few beers, I didn’t want him on the road with any alcohol in his system, and i enjoyed his company, so we end up hanging out until 3 a.m.”
“His mom starts blowing up his phone demanding that he come home, so he drives himself home to find that he’s been locked out of his house. His mom said that he can sleep outside, he shouldn’t be spending time with someone like me (still don’t know what she meant by that), and that i’m ‘just another stop on the pussy train.’”
“He tells her not to talk about me like that, to which she says ‘When you’re under my roof, I’ll say whatever I want about whoever i want!’ so he picks up his phone, calls me, asks if he can stay at my place for a little while.”
“It’s been seven years, we’re engaged, have a dog, a cat, and a happy life. I also plan on throwing some subtle train themes into the wedding/celebration after the end of the plague.” ~ bootylikepoww
“If the concession counter was slammed…”
“I worked in management at a theatre for a while. If the concession counter was slammed and I was able, I’d leave my post and help them sling popcorn.”
“One night while helping out, a particularly belligerent man started cussing out a 16-year-old girl on a cash register for being too slow, even suggesting she quit since she clearly couldn’t handle pushing buttons or scooping popcorn.”
“It was pretty disgusting and I felt so bad for the girl, I stepped in and told the guy that our employees have the right to refuse service to customers who harass them as part of our anti-harassment/discrimination policy, empathized that the lines were longer than usual, and suggested he should apologize and move on.”
“He was PISSED. Left half his order on the counter and started fuming. Anticipating his next move, I went back to my original post that night – as manager of the customer service kiosk.”
“Oh boy, the look on his face when he saw me. (Didn’t want a refund of his tickets though so I assume he watched the movie, without popcorn.) ~ dendriticbranch
“Fast forward twenty years…”
“I wasn’t good at returning library books when I was a kid. I got lectured by my school librarian about it a lot. Fast forward twenty years and I’m a supervisor at the local public library and my former now-retired school librarian goes there.”
“One day I see her sneaking around the front desk instead of coming back to say hi to me and I immediately figure something’s up. I go up to say hi and she acts exasperated and tells me she was trying to avoid me because she had overdue books.”
“So I put on my reading glasses, pulled them down over my nose, and delivered the same lecture she’d given me countless times about being responsible and turning in books on time.” ~ daecrist
There’s something so empowering about these stories.
It makes you feel good to stand up for yourself, doesn’t it?
Good.
You should remember to do it more often.
