Category: Funny

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Boomers Need to Answer These 14 Legit Questions

I kind of love the good-natured ribbing between generations. As someone from GenX, of course, it doesn’t bother me because everyone always forgets we exist, so we hardly ever get dragged.

Boomers, though, have a lot to answer for – like these 14 totally legit questions that we need answers for like, yesterday.

14. Loneliness, probably.

Especially these days.

13. They have forgotten the rules, okay?

Also they don’t care anymore.

12. Definitely doesn’t compute.

Some things will never make sense.

11. There’s an easy answer to this…

They are one with their thinking.

10. Because they can’t hear, obviously.

Or they think the phone doesn’t work.

9. If only they knew the founding fathers (mostly) would have hated cash.

It’s not real money! Not that cards are…

8. Better than okay, I think.

But yeah, periods are a waste of time.

7. Why do they call it The Walmart?

I assume these things are related.

6. There’s definitely an inappropriate joke here somewhere.

Too easy.

5. I have no idea.

Also, I don’t think this is true?

4. Because they’d have to take responsibility then.

Never gonna happen.

3. No one definitely has a television like that one.

Bless their hearts.

2. We know they can’t spot fake news, either.

To be fair, that can be tough these days.

1. It is kind of universal.

If you don’t laugh you’ll cry and all of that.

These have me giggling like crazy! I mean, I like to giggle, so I’m an easy target, but still…

If you’re a Boomer, we need answers, please! Let us know your thoughts in the comments!

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People Recall the First Time They Thought, “I’m Old”

Getting old really isn’t that bad – there are plenty of upsides, with my favorite being not having to fix my hair and also not caring what random people think about my hair.

The downsides are mostly pain-related, if you ask me.

It happens to all of us, and like these 13 people, we can all recall one of the first moments we realized it was really happening.

13. Everyone “hot” is younger than me.

When you realize that almost every actor and actress on TV commercials is younger than you.

12. At first you wonder who they’re talking to.

Teenagers have started to call me “Mr.”, and not ironically.

11. Those things can be an investment.

When I got excited about buying a new bin.

Bought it, looked at it for days thinking how nice it is.

10. They’re all about the memes.

when my students told me they had never seen the matrix, but they thought they maybe recognized a meme from it 💀

9. Get off my lawn, Simpsons.

When I watched new Simpsons for the first time in years, and could hear the age in their voices.

I felt like shaking my fist at a cloud.

8. Our interests have changed.

At a gathering and all the younger people were talking about video games or movies, my friends and I were discussing homeowner related stuff and the older people were discussing their health issues and medications.

My friends wife laughed and said we are now middle age and medicating talk is next for us all.

7. Bless her mama heart.

I was driving and saw a very attractive younger guy running shirtless on the sidewalk.

My immediate thought was “OMG dude! I hope you wore enough sunscreen today!”

6. Ah, back in the day.

I was telling the story of how I broke my back in a car accident.

Someone asked why the airbags didn’t go off or I didn’t just use my cell to call for help.

Both of those things were new when I was old enough to drive.

5. Cringe city.

When I started a sentence with “Well, before the Internet, we used to…”

4. That initial reaction will circle back around.

When I realized it’s acceptable to say “Congratulations” instead of “Oh Shit” when a friend of mine gets pregnant.

3. “To my dog.” Perfect.

When I heard people outside and grumbled about f%cking teenagers to my dog.

2. It can seem overwhelming.

I have no idea what’s happening in music right now.

And I don’t mean that in a wrong generation, “back in my day!” Kind if way.

I mean that I literally have no idea what is happening.

I used to be so plugged in. I knew all the coolest bands and went to all the best shows. I was giving recommendations to people, I was making mix cds, it was my dream job to be a music supervisor for tv. Now.. I don’t know anything any more. I try, but it’s overwhelming.

1. That’s some kind of realization.

“Damn, this grocery store is playing my jams.”

Congrats to all who are getting older, because it means you’re still alive!

Tell us what your aha! moment was in the comments!

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A Woman Could Hardly Contain Herself After Being Pulled Over by a “Hot” Police Officer

Getting pulled over by the cops really stinks. The sinking stomach, the anger at yourself for being stupid, the thoughts of how you’re going to pay your ticket and whether or not your insurance is going to go up.

I’ve never encountered what this woman did, though, and apparently the cop giving you a ticket being super duper hot sort of mitigates the bad parts.

Image Credit: YouTube

Comedian Jennifer Jermany encountered that unexpected moment when she was pulled over, looked out her window, and her jaw hit the floor.

After she’d complied with his official requests, she had to get out of the car and really let him have it.

And by have it, I mean she told him, in fairly good detail, how incredibly handsome he is.

I’m sorry to say that the video really doesn’t do him justice, though we do get to see his smile and a glimpse of a very sexy tattooed forearm.

Image Credit: YouTube

After she gets done telling him that his smile could stop police violence in its tracks, she goes on to say that maybe he could even solve all of the problems in the world with his handsome face.

“Sir, you could bring peace to the Middle East. And I just want you to know, as I thoroughly watch you walk to your car and back, I just want you to know, I could tell you work out and I’m glad. I appreciate God helps you to work out and he did a great job on you.”

I bet she made Officer Scott Schrieffer’s day – and probably his wife’s too, since Jennifer reached out to her to congratulate her on a great catch.

This left me giggling and I had to share it with my friends. Basically, this is the kind of police encounter we definitely need more of, wouldn’t you say?

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A Woman Ignored Creepy Red Flags While House Hunting and Things Got Interesting

If you’ve ever rented a place and needed to move, you know the sense of urgency in finding a new place, and sometimes, you overlook weird things which would be obvious were you not so eager.

One woman on Twitter who goes by the name of Olivia became someone she never thought she become in the process.

She and her husband were new to the area and eager to find a nice place.

They were excited to see a charming older home.

But her husband wasn’t convinced it was such a good idea.

Admittedly, things were weird about it from the get-go.

Especially for Olivia’s husband.

The realtor explained it to the best of her ability.

The upstairs seemed perfect.

The kitchen, however, had some issues.

Scratches?

This is starting to sound like The Amityville Horror:

OMG, a secret room?

But wait, there’s more!

The basement seems… like a basement. Nothing much to see… but wait—what’s that? This time, the realtor is at a loss for words.

Olivia’s husband presses her.

The agent quickly ushers them out.

Once in the yard, Olivia thinks the door leads to the outside, but her husband has a different perspective.

With a window!

On the way home, Olivia was still unsure.

But a realization struck her—she was the white girl in the horror movie who always makes the wrong decisions.She came close to sealing her fate and chalked it up to wanting her dream home THAT badly.

She’ll now take extra precaution.

And noted that there were others like her out there.

Have you ever been in a place that had some things that in it that you just couldn’t explain? Let us know in the comments below!

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Memes for People Who Can’t Stop Talking About History

The saying goes that those who don’t study history are doomed to repeat it. Given that the majority of history has been *checks notes* a total dumpster fire, and given that there is a growing pro-dumpster fire contingency in the world today, I think it’s more important than ever that we heed this warning.

Of course, history is kinda long, and there are upwards of several entire books on the subject, so for starters, let’s just do some history via memes.

10. Rebellion

I offer my largest oof.

9. The big one

You’re harshing everybody’s buzz, dude.

8. Look of recognition

I see nothing. NOTHING!

7. Sick burn

Good thing we’re SUPER good at dealing with this kind of thing now…

6. The blame game

You get what you deserve!

5. New math

$Infinity, please.

4. Khan academy

The dude got around so much he’s probably you’re grandpa.

3. Assassination nation

You gone and stepped in it now, John Flammang Schrank.

2. Terms of agreement

Colonists have just sorta been garbage from the start.

1. Fight for your rights

“Yanno…rights and stuff…to like…do…state things… come on, don’t make me say it.”

Well, history has been horrifying. And there’s so much more of it to come! Just remember, you’re a part of it now. Make choices that won’t make your descendants facepalm, please.

What’s your favorite historical fact?

Share it with us in the comments.

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People Share What They Thought Made Someone Rich When They Were Kids

Children grow up in the bubble of their family’s reality. Whatever’s normal at their house is normal, at least until they start school and start to visit their friends’s houses, and realize that not everyone’s “normal” looks the same.

If you grew up poor, or middle class, there were probably some things that’s existence completely amazed you – people who had those things were rich, surely.

Looking back now, it can seem silly, but everything is bigger and better when you’re small!

12. Still too rich for my blood.

It all gets to Netflix eventually.

11. Those ice machines, man.

A blessing and a curse, they are.

10. Total luxury.

Have one, still appreciate it.

9. That kid was cleaning up!

Little entrepreneur, that one.

8. I never thought about this.

Going to check in my next car purchase, though.

7. In some parts of the world, no one has it.

And I would not like to live there, no thanks.

6. I was so lucky my mom got a teacher discount.

We even had a Mac.

5. I bet he took better care of his, though.

Life lessons are surely worth something.

4. I still don’t understand the point.

Everyone knows they’re tissues.

3. A garage would be hard to live without, in extreme temperatures.

And some people just fill theirs with junk!

2. Like winning the lottery.

There were two houses in our neighborhood.

1. I still think this.

Probably because I’ve never lived in a house with double front doors.

I definitely had some of these ideas myself, how about you?

Add something to the list, please!

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Science Memes That Will Make You Smart…Maybe

Science. What is it, exactly?

And how the heck does it work? Does it want to be my friend? And can it make me rich, somehow? These are the questions we’ll be exploring today on our journey through the cosmos of science memes.

Come aboard our ship of the imagination, and cruise the dank depths of human knowledge.

10. Breathe free

This is why Plankton on Spongebob is always struggling so much.

9. K

I think we might be putting a little too much pressure on this one little letter.

8. Hot take

I may not be the smartest, but you’re an absolute zero.

7. Stellar work

Another star’s career ruined by chemicals. Sad.

6. Genetic love

I’m going to plant a seed of affection.

5. Quantum of solace

If you think you understand it, you’re wrong.

4. Fun guy

Don’t you leave him behind, you monster.

3. Bright ideas

You made this? I made this.

2. Tough work

I mean, sure, they’re experts who have dedicated their lives to studying these things, but I also saw a Facebook meme, so.

1. The hard truths

The laws of nature are tough but fair.

I feel smarter already! But in all seriousness – please listen to experts when they tell you science stuff. Please? Before we ruin everything forever? Thanks.

What’s your favorite science fact?

Tell us in the comments.

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People Imagine What Animals Who Could Defeat Humans If They Really Tried

I know that humans have things like guns and (supposedly) higher brain function, but listen – don’t you think there are some cases when none of that is going to stand up to a horde of really sharp teeth and claws?

Or like…geese. If the geese formed a posse I would be on my way to an underground bunker so fast, y’all.

Here are 13 other people’s takes on the animals we should fear more than we do.

13. We should all be worried about those literal dinosaurs.

I’m worried about cassowarries.

They are fierce AF!

12. It’s a good thing most of them are domesticated.

Canadians.

Haha, no seriously… Canadians.

They look nice… but they’r enot.

11. What if they banded together?

750k deaths a year when mosquitoes aren’t making an effort.

Don’t mess with those things, fam!

10. I mean what if none of us could eat carbs again?

The ~3.5kg of bacteria that call your gut home and control your digestion.

They also carry more information in their DNA than you.

If they wanna wreck their vehicle you will not stop them.

9. You know what he’s talking about, right?

Don’t quote me on this, but I’m pretty sure there’s a movie series about this.

Planet of the…..of the…ummm…uhhhh…I can’t remember.

Oh, yeah! Apes!

8. When they party in your brain all night.

Spongebob showed my how deadly nematodes are.

Once they get inside of you.. game over!

7. If you’re not terrified of monkeys, you’re not paying attention.

Chimpanzees are the only other species than humans known to wage organized wars and to engage in torture.

They’re also the closest relatives to humans and the second smartest animal behind us.

6. Seriously you don’t want to know too much about dolphins.

Dolphins.

They can easily kill sharks. They gang up on them and basically ram them to death.

Oh, and they have attacked humans in captivity.

5. Or just give us all horrible diseases.

I’ve played Dishonored a lot, so I believe that rats could eat all the Humans easily if they wanted to.

4. I would like these ants to stay off of my continent please and thank you. Fire ants are enough.

I lived in East Africa for 6 years and I love watching giant African siafu ants. Sometimes the ants will make a tunnel – a tunnel of ants – that let the others pass from one place to another safely.

They’ve got a good bite on them too! My rule has always been that if you can see siafu, you’ve got them on you somewhere, so check your legs! I once got a load of them under my jeans and so ran into my house, whipped off my jeans and jumped in the shower. BAD. MOVE. As soon as the water hit my body, these guys all bit down HARD in unison, leaving me frantically trying to brush them off me. Now, in the bush, siafu are a handy part of any first-aid routine because they bite so hard and so firmly that you can use them as field stitches. It took me a while to pick off each individual ant, but I learned a valuable lesson!

I’ve heard stories about drunk people passing out and being found the next day having been almost picked clean by siafu.

That’s a hell of a way to go…

3. Some people are just a little too confident in weapons, I think.

Yeah, it’s like literally nobody in this thread has heard of the flamethrower.

There is no animal that could deal with modern weaponry.

2. I mean you’ve seen Finding Nemo, right?

Fu*ckin Seagulls.

Swooping down and ruining your life!

1. We’re trying to test that theory.

Forget animals fighting us – bees could wipe out at least a sizable majority of humans by doing precisely nothing.

This list just cracked me up! Thinking about some of these guys organizing (but seriously, keep the monkeys away from me!).

What would you add? What animal are you most afraid of? Tell me in the comments!

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Animals That Could Take Us All Out If They Decided They’d Had Enough

We like to think we’re at the top of the food chain, but in reality that’s not even close to the truth. Sure, we can use tools and (some of us) have developed higher level thinking, but listen – don’t get too comfortable, y’all.

If we piss these 16 animals off enough, they can definitely take us all down.

16. You should learn something new every day.

Nematodes. Here’s some fun facts about our worm overlords!

There are 57 billion nematodes per person on Earth, making them 80% of all animals here. They have an incredible reproductive rate – the intestinal roundworm can lay 200 000 eggs in a day.

Nematodes are very hardy and are found in diverse and hostile environments, from deserts to Antarctica. 8 species of Nematodes have been found to live in Mono Lake, which contains deadly levels of arsenic. When tested, those nematodes were found to be capable of tolerating 500x the lethal dose of arsenic for humans.

Oh, many of them are parasitic, including 60 types that prey on humans. That’s actually relatively low, considering there are 25 000 parasitic nematodes for vertebrates.

You know how the tardigrade gets credit for being one of the few organisms capable of surviving in outer space? Well, the nematode species C.elegans is the only species who has survived a virtually unprotected atmospheric re-entry to Earth during the 2003 Space Columbia disaster.

Most nematodes are small, but not all. Placentonema gigantissima can span up to 8-9m in length and lives in the placenta of sperm whales.

Hope you enjoy this bit of trivia! Let’s end with a quote by nematologist Nathan Cobb.

“If all the matter in the universe except nematodes were swept away, our world would still be dimly recognizable… we should find mountains, hills, vales, rivers, lakes and oceans represented by a film of nematodes”

15. We’re doing a good job all on our own.

Humans seems to be pretty fed up with each other a lot of the time?

14. An argument could be made for either. Or both.

I know the answer is supposed to be ants, but it really sounds like you are describing a sharknado.

13. I am legit terrified of monkeys.

Chimpanzees are the only other species than humans known to wage organized wars and to engage in torture.

They’re also the closest relatives to humans and the second smartest animal behind us.

12. Take the watermelon, leave the cannoli.

Ants I would think.

I’ve seen videos of those giant African seifu things walking into peoples houses stealing their watermelons.

They just sort of go…ok.

It’s you guyses watermelon, just stay away from me.

11. In case you weren’t convinced.

Bats… apparently.

Plus the rabies. Where I live, if you get bats, you can’t even get them removed or relocated because they are considered endangered(wrong word, protected). You’re only allowed to wait for them to leave and try to patch wherever they got in… but they can fit in holes smaller than them, similar to mice.

Cute yet terribly horrific creatures.

10. Or been to the beach?

Have none of you seriously seen “the birds”

They will f*ck us up!

9. They don’t care at all.

Mother f*cking honey badgers.

Not only are they good guns but they don’t give a sh%t at all.

8. Same goes for small monkeys. *shudder*

If rats band together and attack in waves is disease we are done.

7. With their cuteness, maybe.

Those bit*ha$s raccoons.

Have you seen their little hands?

Nothing but evil, y’all!

6. Or if they died…oh.

We’d all be fucked if the pollinators went on strike.

No food. We’d starve.

Truth.

5. Lord I hate flies.

Flies.

They just have to fart on our food or kamikaze down our throats and we’d all die from sickness.

4. Actually like most of the animals in Australia.

The emu’s, I’m looking at you Australia.

Have you seen their feet?

They will mess some sh*t up!

3. If they team up with the geese all is lost.

Ducks.

They would form some sort of alliance with swans and geese, then bully the rabbits into joining.

The ducks would use the rabbits to tempt foxes out, the foxes would lure fox hunters and their pack of hounds into traps.

Fox hunters are usually posh people with power in government.

So Ducks.

2. Only if you like nightmares.

You should read about prions.

The diseases they cause are grim. Mad Cow Disease is the most famous, but kuru also possesses a certain notoriety thanks to its unorthodox mode of transmission.

Although uncommon, prion diseases are incurable and bring dementia swiftly followed by death. In the case of spontaneous Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease (sCJD), the most common prion disease, half of patients are dead within six months of symptom onset. That figure reaches 95% within a year.

In a particularly vexing twist, prions are also nearly impervious to destruction, even when attacked using a strenuous combination of disinfectants, heat, and pressure.

1. Look at this hot take.

None.

There is a reason we are where we are. Even if the wave of ants (the most popular answered here) flood the earth we will fight bqck.

We are able to cover the cities in pesticides. We are able to live in subzero temperatures, we are able to heat up the planet and burn/flood the areas.

We are able to build cities in sea when no ant can reach us.

Only humans are able to get rid of humans at this point. And even this is barely possible.

I don’t want to think too long and hard about this, honestly!

What animal do you think is missing from this list? Add it in the comments!

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An Elevator Technician Got Revenge on a Very Entitled Woman

There are people in this world who just feel like they are owed everything simply because they want it.

Sometimes, that means they think they are entitled to tangible objects. Other times, they demonstrate that they believe everyone should orient their lives around what works best for them.

In this story, an elevator technician explains how he exacted revenge on a woman who just couldn’t wait for an hour while he fixed the elevator in her building.

And it turns out that he wasn’t the only one who was frustrated with her.

The guy starts by explaining that the job is exactly what it sounds like: when the elevator breaks, he’s the one who comes out and fixes it.

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

So far, so good. We’re all following.

One day, he needed to replace an emergency light in an elevator.

He explains that elevator tech has evolved, so when these lights go out, it usually takes a while to swap it all.

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

He’s clearly stated how long the job will take, and it’s a pretty important one.

Just because the elevator isn’t technically broken, it doesn’t mean that the elevator should be used.

However, the woman isn’t happy with this response.

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

Whew!

She’s already mad about having to use the stairs, and decides that it’s better to just wait an hour instead.

What about her groceries?

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

At this point, it’s definitely pretty galling that the woman is still sitting right there.

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

The woman has got to be totally freaking out right now!

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

Can you believe the daughter is totally supportive?

This woman must be pretty challenging to live with.

Also, before you get super worried, the technician made sure the woman was always safe.

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

That story is truly wild! It’s amazing how quickly the technician was able to exact his revenge.

Which part do you think is the funniest?

Let us know in the comments!

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