A Woman’s Idea to Respond the U.S. Evacuating Coronavirus Patients Was to Shoot Down the Plane

People lose their minds about infectious diseases, though it seems as if we tend to freak out more about the ones that are less likely to kill us (like Ebola), while refusing to get the flu shot for a disease that actually kills tens of thousands of people every year.

The coronavirus currently wigging people out is new, it’s deadlier than the flu, and we still don’t know much about how it spreads (though it looks like a vaccine is in the works, so yay for that), which means plenty of people are worried it’s going to be the next Spanish flu.

One woman on Twitter, though, is ready to pull out the full nuclear options from the get-go – she wrote this in response to a tweet from CNN about American citizens being evacuated from places where the infection is more prevalent.

@TheSocietyDude posted a screenshot of a tweet from a woman, Jessica, who thought the only and obvious solution was to shoot down the plane. Seriously.

But if you think that’s the best part of the story, then you must not know much about Twitter – because of course, people’s replies were the best part.

My personal favorites were the people comparing Jessica to the Karens of the world looking to speak to a manager about every little decision that hasn’t gone their way.

Luckily for everyone on board that flight (which contained kids, just FYI) the government didn’t take her rather panicked advice.

It’s lucky, anyway, as long as this doesn’t go into full disaster movie mode soon and we wish that we’d listened.

I think that’s pretty much how The Walking Dead started, idk.


Seriously, don’t be like Karen. Take a few extra precautions in the coming weeks. Make sure you and your kids are washing your hands, like, extra well. Make sure you’ve got hand sanitizer and don’t have empty cupboards, but don’t go around advocating for the merciless death of dozens of people.

It won’t be a good look when everything turns out fine.

The post A Woman’s Idea to Respond the U.S. Evacuating Coronavirus Patients Was to Shoot Down the Plane appeared first on UberFacts.

Here’s a Rotary Dial Cell Phone for the Old at Heart

Even if you sometimes long for the “good ol’ days” or get a pang of nostalgia when you see a rotary dial phone hanging on the wall (in a museum, I guess), I’m not sure there is really anyone who thinks rotary dial was like, more efficient or the way to go.

Image Credit: Justine Haupt

That said, if you’re totally into retro things and living like the pioneers did – or you just cannot wrap your brain around modern technology no matter how hard you try – you’re going to love this effort from engineer Justine Haupt of the Cosmology Instrumentation Group at Brookhaven National Laboratory.

Because she’s created a totally new cellphone that uses a rotary dial instead of those newfangled touch screens everyone’s always going on about.

Image Credit: Justine Haupt

To make it, she used a dial from a classic Trimline telephone and crafted the body from an Arduino interface and Adafruit parts.

She actually had the idea for the phone, and put that plan into action, for herself – she was tired of being distracted by the bells and whistles offered by her modern phone.

Image Credit: Justine Haupt

“Why a rotary cellphone?”

She writes on her website.

“Because in a finicky, annoying, touchscreen world of hyperconnected people using phones they have no control over or understanding of, I wanted something that would be entirely mine, personal, and absolutely tactile, while also giving me an excuse for not texting.

So it’s not just a show-and-tell piece. My intent is to use it as my primary phone. It fits in a pocket; It’s reasonably compact; calling the people I most often call is faster than with my old phone, and the battery lasts almost 24 hours.”

Image Credit: Justine Haupt

Well, good for Justine! It’s awesome that she had the ability to create something that would work perfectly for her life and needs, and who knows?

Maybe there are other monsters out there who would prefer to make an actual call instead of texting.

*shudder*

Image Credit: Justine Haupt

Oh, and p.s., she’s created a kit that you can buy through robotics company skysedge.us in order to make your very own!

Please, please let us know how that turns out, and whether your friends and family try to commit you to a mental institution after you show it off.

The post Here’s a Rotary Dial Cell Phone for the Old at Heart appeared first on UberFacts.

This is Why Parents Think Home Economics Should Return to High School Curriculums

We live in a day and age when technology controls just about everything. We depend on it for shopping, cooking, research, news, networking, social interaction, and pretty much most of the things we do from sun up to sundown.

But, here’s the thing…

Even though you can order detergent on the internet, it cannot do your laundry.

You can have spools of thread and needles delivered to your door, but they aren’t going to patch holes on their own.

And the web is full of suggestions for yummy meals, and you can order the components, but no one can cook that meal for you.

Basically, there are life skills that aren’t being taught or learned when kids are spending too much time focusing on the technology side of life.

Without a mandatory course in school that addresses the mundane business of keeping a person and home afloat through the years, many kids are graduating without understanding things like finances, nutrition, sewing, cleaning, gardening, cooking, and many other skills we’re all going to need when our society inevitably collapses one day.

Parents are educators are imagining a home economics course that runs the gamut from the physical labor skills to those that are needed to understand taxes, pay monthly bills, and to maintain healthy relationships within the family and our communities.

No one is saying that math, science, english, reading, and the arts that kids are learning in schools aren’t important, just that their eventual career is only part of what it takes to be a successful, independent adult. And unless kids are landing six-figure jobs right out of college, no one can afford to outsource every daily task.

We need to make sure that our education system is churning out not only competent academics, but competent human beings who are ready and willing to fill their slot in society.

I mean, for as long as it’s around, obviously.

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Fungi That Eats Radiation Are Thriving in Chernobyl, the Site of the Nuclear Disaster

Chernobyl has been in the spotlight since the radiation explosion that happened in April of 1986 – people are fascinated with disasters, of course, but also with the ideas of apocalypse and what humanity and the world around it might look like if something similar happened on a wider scale.

In much smaller, but still fascinating news, there’s a unique, curious sort of fungi munching on the still-radioactive walls of the nuclear reactors. They’re not alone, either – scientists have documented around 200 species of 98 genera of fungi living in and around the ruins of the former nuclear power plant.

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Published February 06, 2020 Last Update 11 hrs ago #Chernobyl shocker as fungi that eats #radiation found inside #nuclearreactor  By Christopher Carbone | Fox A type of #blackfungi that #eatsradiation was discovered inside the Chernobyl nuclear reactor. In 1991, the strange fungi was found growing up the walls of the reactor, which baffled scientists due to the extreme, radiation-heavy environment. Researchers eventually realized that not only was the fungi impervious to the deadly radiation, it seemed to be attracted to it. A decade later, researchers tested some of the fungi and determined that it had a large amount of the #pigment #melanin — which is also found, among other places, in the #skin of #humans. Ruined reactor of the Chernobyl nuclear power plant, in in 2016 (iStock) People with #darkerskin tones tend to have much more melanin, which is known to #absorblight and dissipate #ultraviolet radiation in skin. However in fungi, it reportedly absorbed radiation and converted it into some type of #chemicalenergy for growth. In a 2008 paper, Ekaterina Dadachova, then of the Albert Einstein College of Medicine in New York, noted that the fungi attracted to radiation are unlikely to be the first examples of their kind. "Large quantities of highly #melanized fungal spores have been found in early Cretaceous period deposits when many species of animals and plants died out. This period coincides with Earth’s crossing the “#magneticzero” resulting in the loss of its “shield” against #cosmicradiation," the paper's introduction states. The fungi indicate that there could be places in the #cosmos — which we are unaware of — where organisms could live in radiation-filled environments.

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While the majority of them just aren’t bothered by the high levels of radiation, some of the fungi – known as “black” or “radiotrophic” fungi – actually eat the radiation. They’re armed with melanin that allows them to convert gamma radiation into chemical energy for growth, and it’s possible it helps shield them from the harmful effects of the radiation itself.

Though scientists understand how the black fungi are converting the radiation into energy, the science on why remains out.

“In many commercial nuclear reactors, the radioactive water becomes contaminated with melanotic organisms [with black pigmentation]. Nobody really knows what the hell they are doing there,” said microbiologist Arturo Casadevall back in 2007.

His team conducted research into the fungi at Chernobyl and found three species – Cladosporium sphaerospermum, Cryptococcus neoformans, and Wangiella dermatitis – that are able to withstand radiation levels about 500x higher than those in the background.

Not only that, but they actually seem to grow faster the higher their exposure to radiation. Other studies have found that these particular fungi point their spores and hyphae toward the source of radiation, as though reaching for the energy source.

Kasthuri Venkateswaran, a scientist at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory, has also closely studied the fungi.

“Following the accident, fungi were the first organisms to pop up and scientists wanted to understand how they can thrive in such an environment.

The fungi collected at the accident site had more melanin than the fungi collected from outside the exclusion zone.

This means the fungi have adapted to the radiation activity, and as many as 20 percent were found to be radiotrophic – meaning they grew towards the radiation; they loved it.”

NASA and other scientists are interested in black fungi for other reasons, too – some of the spores from Chernobyl were sent to the International Space Station in the hopes that they would divulge some of their secrets for tolerating such high levels of radiation.

There’s also some talk of using them as a food source for astronauts during long flights, but idk…that does not sound delicious, to me.

Science, am I right? What will they think of next?

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A Woman’s Story About Her Boyfriend Sharing Her Nudes With Family Sparked a Big Conversation

Issues around sharing intimate photos in the age of the smart phone have left a lot of people – and governments – flailing to catch up with new questions.

Almost everyone either has a story about trouble they’ve run into with nude photos, or knows someone who does. The most frequent version of this story is “I sent someone I trusted pictures and they ended up somewhere I didn’t want them to be.”

One reddit user on r/TwoXChromosomes had a variation on this story that left a lot of people shocked, and sparked over 1,000 replies in a giant conversation about toxic masculinity, shame, privacy, and the law.

I ( 24F) found out that my ( 25M) boyfriend has been sharing my nudes with his father.

…I found out only because I was scrolling through his phone and he shared them over text message.

His dad made disgusting sick comments like “that’s my boy” and “ dan [sic] she’s hot and wet, she’s a keeper”.

Never ever in my life have I ever trusted anyone as much as I trusted my boyfriend. I had never sent nudes to anyone before in my life because I was terrified something like this would happen.

– findmyiPad-

Things like this don’t just ruin someone’s day, or end a relationship, they can warp how a person sees themselves, and how they interact with the world, maybe permanently.

I ended up cutting off all contact with him and I am completely disgusted and so ashamed and embarrassed. I have not been able to leave my house in 2 days because I feel so objectified, used and I feel like complete trash.

I am not sure if I am going to take any steps against him legally because we were together for 3 years and I really don’t want to destroy the rest of his life with criminal charges. I am just really sick and confused right now.

I need some advice.

Thank you.

– findmyiPad-

It obviously wasn’t long before the replies started rolling in. First, we’ll get the obvious out of the way.

WTF? This is so sick

– Texcoco95

There was, naturally, every variation of “get tf out of there.”

As a guy, get out!

– jimmy-cell

A ton of people sympathized, with sometimes shockingly similar experiences.

I was not in the same situation as you exactly, but I will say I had some similar and didn’t want to ruin their lives with charges. The man in my case went on to ruin the lives of other women. I regret every day not pressing charges

– claireupvotes

Many offered words of encouragement and reminders that – even though this feels like it shouldn’t need to be said – people who find themselves in this situation aren’t the ones at fault. You feel bad, but that doesn’t mean you did wrong.

I’m sorry you feel embarrassed, but for heaven’s sake don’t be ashamed. No one who has been assaulted (and yes, ask any therapist on the planet – this is a form of assault, whether it’s against a woman OR a man) should feel ashamed. YOU did nothing wrong.

– remberzz

The thread contains a lot of pondering on how elements of male culture can encourage this type of thing.

I don’t understand the mentality, but I’ve sadly seen it before. My ex’s dad would commend him on getting hot girls etc. It was disgusting, and led to our breakup.

– THE_DUCK_HORSE

This typifies many of the responses:

I think its most likely a weird insecurity thing. They do it to confirm that other males approve of their choice and that others will see them as sexually successful.

– bikesexually

Overall, the thread was 100% supportive, which was refreshing to see.

Allow yourself time to process this betrayal of trust and then when you feel like you’ve found your feet, you can start making decisions on how to move forward.

– WadesUnbridledAnger

A few users attempted to dive into the legal options.

Unfortunately a good amount of US states only class sharing nudes without consent as a misdemeanor. I know because someone threatened me with that and in my state it’s only a misdemeanor.

– anti_citizen

But it quickly became clear that if you want to truly weigh your legal options, talk to a lawyer. Laws on these things still vary a lot from state to state.

In Illinois it’s a felony.

Edit: Also in Arizona, Hawaii, Idaho, Kansas, Louisiana, Missouri, Nevada, New Hampshire, North Carolina and Texas for the first offense, according to cybercivilrights.org. Plus in Missouri, merely threatening to distribute images is a felony in itself.

In New Jersey a first offense is a “third degree crime” with the possibility of 3-5 years in prison and a $15,000 fine, which sounds pretty felonious to me.

Oh and shoutout to Massachusetts, Mississippi, South Carolina and Wyoming, where it’s still not a punishable offense on any level.

– dangerouslyloose

Reading through this thread hit close to home for me because I recently tried to help a loved one navigate the same types of questions, and it’s never easy.

But it is encouraging to see culture shift toward a more supportive attitude to victims of this breeches of trust.

The post A Woman’s Story About Her Boyfriend Sharing Her Nudes With Family Sparked a Big Conversation appeared first on UberFacts.

Memes About Life in the 1990s and Why Kids Will Never Know the Struggle

I try not to go off on my “you damn kids don’t know how good you’ve got it!” rants too often. After all, it’s not like us American 90’s kids grew up traversing a dessert to get well water or something. It’s not like we were all dying of dysentery in our ox-drawn carriages (though we did love to pretend we were, for some reason.)

Still. The rate at which technology has moved in the last few decades does mess with my mind enough that I can’t help but occasionally shake my head at how different everything is.

Let’s reflect on this with some memes.

15. Circle “yes,” “no,” or “maybe”

14. WELL IS SHE?!

13. It’s amazing I never wrecked my car flipping through this

12. This was my retirement plan

11. There’s a lot going on here

10. As long as nobody finds my diary

9. This sentence would be gibberish now

8. Our coming of age was a little…slower

7. And then you’d immediately lose this

6. We didn’t understand minesweeper, but we played it, dammit

5. Beware the dreaded double exposure!

4. Brought to you by limewire.exe

3. This is the only true art

2. There are so many more ways to ignore people now

1. Honestly, a better investment

Alright, now get off my lawn.

What was the hardest part about 90’s life for you?

Let us know in the comments.

The post Memes About Life in the 1990s and Why Kids Will Never Know the Struggle appeared first on UberFacts.

A Mom Wrote a Touching Open Letter to Parents Who Sacrifice Years of Their Lives Life for Someone Else

Parenting is hard, and no matter what your family’s circumstances, it requires regular sacrifice. If you’re a stay-at-home mom that means giving up pretty much everything else in your life in order to make sure your babies get the best start possible on theirs.

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Dear stay at home mom who sits around all day, I see you. I see you curled up on the couch with your little one because they wanted to snuggle for nap time. I see it took a while to get your little one to sleep because they were fussy and you were exhausting yourself so you needed to sit. I see you getting up in the middle of the night to check on your little one. I see all the diaper changes, all the feedings, all the time you take to comfort your little one when they aren't feeling well. I see you working on the development skills. I see you cooking and cleaning, attending to the pets to make sure they still feel loved. I see you making sure your spouse is taken care of and I see you putting your family before yourself. Dear stay at home mom who sits around all day, I see your messy bun and sweat pants with stains all over them, your legs under you while you sit on the couch drinking cold coffee. I see you finally having time for yourself because your family and home is taken care of. ❤ . . . #dear #herestoyou #stayathomemom #sahm #stayathomemomlife #sahmlife #sahmomlife #stayathomemomlife #stayathome #stayathomemoms #stayathomemum #stayathomemommy #mom #momlife #sahmom #iseeyou #littleone #dearmom

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It can be a thankless job, and one you’re not sure you really wanted some days, and there are doubts and worries that seem to compound every day.

There are the regular ones about how well you’re doing as a parent, whether or not you could be doing better or more, and the ones where you wonder whether your career or friends or hobbies will be there waiting when you can get back to them in a few years.

This woman wrote an open letter to the stay-at-home moms and honestly, it brought a bit of a tear to my eye.

“Dear stay-at-home mom,
⁣⁣
I see the work you’re doing in raising these children and it is the hardest, most undervalued kind of work.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
I want you to know no one else was considered for the job. You were the only one qualified for this child.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
You are a sacrificial and serving mom.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
You are a woman who is giving up a few years of her life to guarantee another human has the best years of theirs.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
You are creating memories, even on the mundane days.⁣⁣

You are providing the consistency that all children deserve.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
You are teaching them that it’s great to have the best day ever, but it’s more realistic to not. So even in your flops and failures they are learning the invaluable lesson of resilience.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
You are a chef, chauffeur, social event coordinator, speech developer, housekeeper, counselor, toy fixer/finder, nurse, librarian, physical education teacher, leader, mother and friend.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
You are employed by the greatest company: Your child.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
You won’t enjoy every minute, and that’s okay, no job is without its setbacks. But one day you’ll look up and you’ll have a bit more of your life back. Your meals will be warm, your clothes unstained.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
And you’ll remember, the years you spent pouring into another person never went unnoticed.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
If they can’t say it right now, I will:⁣⁣
⁣⁣
You are a good, good mother⁣.⁣”

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Sometimes the most emotive pictures are the simplest – – – – – – This post’s for you mamas. I see you tired, doing your best for your little ones and I also see you doing everything for them…. and at times, you forget about yourself. – – – – Because I was that mama too until I decided that I was going to work on my health after having Arthur because that’s what is most important for this little chap.. that he gets the best version me. – – – This little chap will look at his mama and see that this was all for him. To show him it’s all possible, but also so I can spend that precious time with him and teach the importance of a health lifestyle. – — – The time I never got when I was away from him 11 hours a day at 9 months old, leaving him with our full time nanny whilst I worked out my big corporate London career. – – – Thinking about it makes me well up, because I have worked so flipping hard to enjoy more time with him. – – – It’s true I’m not a full time stay at home mum, as A goes to preschool, but to me this is perfect. I get to enjoy those mornings and evenings with A when I was chugging into london ? and when I pick him up from preschool at 315pm. It’s our time and it’s so precious to me, but so is having a meaningful fulfilling career – – – – This is motivation enough for me to smash this biz because in turn I am helping so many mamas work on their own health, but I’m also paving the way for them to do the same with their careers…. – – – Nothing fills my heart more than this little boy. – – – You never know what focusing on your own health could do for your whole life just because I said yes to an opportunity to get fit after having Arthur right here – – – – #toddlermum #dreamlife #mummysboy #careergirl #mummysboy #mylittleboy #fitnessmum #fitnessmummy #workfromanywhere #workfromhomemom #dowhatyoulove #dowhatmakesyouhappy #healthymummy #womeninwellness #postpartumbody #postpartumfitness #postpartumhealth #healthyfamily #familyiseverything #familyfirstalways #stayathomemom #stayathomemomlife #womeninspiringwomen #dreambigger #daretodream #careermum

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The letter was penned by Stephanie Hanrahan, who you can follow on Facebook, Instagram, or her website.

It’s nice to know that on the days I’ve not been able to shower, when my clothes are splattered with heaven knows what, the toddler is crying for no reason and the baby is pulling all of the snacks out of the cabinet that people still see me – and they think the work I’m doing is good.

The post A Mom Wrote a Touching Open Letter to Parents Who Sacrifice Years of Their Lives Life for Someone Else appeared first on UberFacts.

Movie Fans Share Their Favorite Hidden Disney “Adult” Jokes

Films for the whole family are Disney’s bread and butter, but that doesn’t mean they don’t hide “adult” jokes that go over kids’ heads.

A Reddit thread asked people to share their favorite such jokes. There were thousands of responses, but here are some that stood out.

15. Oedipal Jokes, Hercules

“When Hercules is walking with Meg after their date and he says ‘And then that play, that Oedipus thing?

Man, I thought I had problems!’”

StarryBlossom

14. The Glance, Ratatouille

“In Ratatouille when the chef dude says I have a little tiny- as to referring to his rat but the girl quickly glances towards his crotch.

The master chef also says ‘One can get TOO familiar with vegetables you know.’”

JustBorde

13. The Open Wings, Toy Story 2

When Buzz Lighteryear’s wings open after seeing Jessie pull off a cool stunt at the end of Toy Story 2.”

ZDog64

12. Piston Cups, Cars

“Lightning McQueen: ‘Guys, Doc has three Piston Cups!’ Mater: /spittake/ ‘He did WHUT in his cup?!’”

096

11. Shoe Size, Frozen

“One example I like to use is from Frozen.

When Anna is in the sleigh with Christoph he is asking about Prince Hans. One of his questions is ‘shoe size?’ Her response is ‘shoe size doesn’t matter.’”

Mogulzns

10. Under The Sea, The Little Mermaid

“‘Baby it’s better

Down where it’s wetter

Take it from me’

Great flex, Sebastian.”

xUnika

9. This Shrek Number

“The Robin Hood song in Shrek:

Hood: I like a little spice and a saucy little maid

Merry Men: what he’s basically saying is that he likes to get – (laid)

Hood, interrupting: Paid!”

Zalminen

8. This Misunderstanding, Trolls

“I’m the movie Trolls, the trolls are confused by what sarcasm was, so one of them goes, ‘I think I had a sarcasm once..’

If..If you get what I mean..”

7. This Marination, Aristocats

“In the Aristocats- when that goose stumbles out of that restaurant and we see the menu for that night, the special being Goose Basted in White Wine. O’Malley says, “Basted? He’s been marinated in it!”

5 year old me was like what? 25 year old me was like ha!”

shadleberry

6. Multiplication Jokes, Zootopia

“In Zootopia / Zootropolis.

-Judy Hopps (a rabbit) comes from the town of BunnyBurrow. When you see the sign board for the town, the town population number is a clicker, constantly clicking up.

-When Judy tries to get the fox Nick to help her, she blackmails him. Threatens to charge him with tax evasion if he doesn’t help her. She starts calculating how much tax he has failed to pay and says ‘I mean, what do I know, I’m just a dumb bunny, but we are good at multiplying…’”

Sygga

5. Mr. Potato Head’s Move, Toy Story

“The classic Mr. Potato head taking off his lips and patting them on his “behind” in Toy Story.

As a kid I had no idea what that meant, but re-watching it while I was on a binge I finally realized he was saying “ass kisser” and I lost it.”

Fluttermun

4. Acupuncturists, Mulan

“Mulan

‘My children never caused such trouble. They all became acupuncturists!’

“Well we can’t all be acupuncturists!”

‘No! Your great granddaughter had to be a cross-dresser!’”

HugOWar

3. This Photo, The Rescuers

“The photo of a topless woman in a window in The Rescuers.

Disney claims that it was added in post production and that their animators aren’t responsible. They also forced a recall of 3.4 million VHS copies of the film in 1999 when the image was finally discovered.”

Galaxy_Ranger_Bob

2. This Reference to #2, Finding Nemo

“Finding Nemo, as the fish have just started polluting their tank.

‘Doesn’t anybody realize we are swimming in our own sh–‘

‘Shh! Here he comes!’”

Valcyor

1. Bath-time Jokes, Prince of Egypt

“In Prince of Egypt where Moses was getting a bath and then said “you’ve cleaned every inch of me- woah! I was wrong.”

Go watch it if you believe in the Bible or aren’t easily offended religion-wise.”

DragonGaming11

There are many more jokes in the original thread. With the many animated Disney films, there are probably tons of jokes waiting to be discovered.

Are there any jokes you think Redditors miss?

There’s space for you to share them below in the comments!

The post Movie Fans Share Their Favorite Hidden Disney “Adult” Jokes appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share the Cringeworthy Stuff Partners Did That Were Supposed to Be Romantic

Hitting a bullseye when it comes to romance can be a risky game.

Something that you might think is incredibly romantic or sexy might cause another person to recoil in horror. Hey, it happens to the best of us, right?

People on AskReddit shared the romantic gestures that they’ve received that they really weren’t feeling…at all.

1. That’s not what you’re supposed to do.

“He used to think that whispering sweet nothings into my ear meant literally whispering the phrase, “sweet nothings.”

Took me about a year before I couldn’t keep a straight face anymore.”

2. That’s pretty gross.

“Had an ex who thought that it would be hot to surprise me by getting Hershey’s syrup, whipped cream, and a banana to make a sundae IN HERSELF.

Do you want yeast infections?…because that’s how you get yeast infections.

She got a yeast infection.”

3. Thanks a lot?

“During an encounter of a sexual nature with a girl I was seeing at the time she whispers “you’ve got the 3rd biggest penis of a man I have ever been with”.

4. Still enjoyed it.

“My girlfriend when I was 16 tried to give me a lap dance while I was editing her English paper. She threw her head back and broke my nose.

At 16 that was still kinda hot.”

5. That’s creepy.

“After a long week of exams, I came home to take a nap before we went out for the weekend.

My ex lied to my roommates to get a key to the place and proceeded to watch me sleep for 4 hours to make sure I wasn’t “disturbed.””

6. You’re going to love my mother.

“For Valentine’s Day one year my ex-husband got me a full body massage…with his massage therapist mother.

One hour of straight cringing.”

7. Ugh! No way!

“Bought me one praying mantis egg because she thought it would contain one praying mantis.

It hatched in my room and there were like 500 babies eating each other and crawling everywhere, since they were small enough to fit through the vents in the bug cage.”

8. Totally hammered.

“My now-husband, after a night of drinking in college, decided he would sneak into my dorm room (I had to work the following morning) and kiss me awake and we’d have some sexytime.

He completely overestimated the level of suaveness he could pull off while plastered. He makes it through the door without me hearing, but I wake up to a naked dude crawling up my body from the bottom of my twin bed. I screamed and shoved – as one should in such a scenario – and he ended up on the floor, where he very nearly passed out.

About this time, I realized who it was, got his naked butt up off the floor, closed the door after assuring my sleepy neighbor that he was fine, and shoved him into my bed. I got into bed, and he attempted to crawl on top of me, mumbling something about how sexy I was in the middle of the night. It took two “Go to SLEEP, [VandyBoy]”s before he finally rolled over and passed out.

He had no idea the next day how he’d ended up in my bed.”

9. It took you two years?

“Went over every inch of my face like a blind man reading Braille. Something about being able to better remember me later….

And instead of kissing me on the cheek or forehead, he would kiss under my chin, like, directly beneath my tongue…because “it was a space no one else had ever kissed” or something.

Took me 2 years to realize how damn crazy he was.”

10. Just like Swayze in Road House.

“When we were 16 my boyfriend tried to give me a lap dance and tried to swing his leg over my head.

He’s not the most flexible person so he ended roundhouse kicking me in the face and making me cry.”

11. Very, very sensual.

“My ex girlfriend got turned on by the romance languages and heavy accents. Luckily for her, I took 4 years of Latin in middle and high school. Unfortunately it’s not really a speakable language, however I memorized a few things for class assignments.

I seductively whispered the pledge of allegiance and the opening paragraph of the Caesar’s Gallic Wars in her ears more times than I can remember.”

12. How truly touching…

“A guy I went out on a total of one date with.

We were at Burger King (yes, I know, how romantic to begin with), when he saw a fly on the window next to our table. In a display of his big strong manly man-ness, he used his bare hand and smashed it against the window. Upon seeing me disgusted, he decided that, to make it better, he would just smear the guts into a heart shape on the window glass.

How truly touching.”

13. That is painful.

“There was this guy that I was making out with, but I was hell-bent on not letting it get serious. He was handsome, but he was way too cringy.

So one night, he texts me to come up to his dorm, and I’m expecting the usual make out session.

When I arrive, he greets me at the door. Candles glittering like a godamn Toni Braxton video. We weren’t even allowed to have candles. He picks me up in bridegroom pose and whisks me over to his twin bed. All the while, his poor roommate is hunched over his computer in the corner with his headphones on, just pretending that this is all not happening.

The guy proceeds to play me a song he wrote on his acoustic guitar and sings to me with tears in his eyes. I just kept glancing at the roommate for some intervention, but nah, he wasn’t having it.

When he finishes, he puffs his chest for courage and confidently declares his love for me. There was a long, cliffhanger of a silence before I said: “I’m sorry, but I don’t feel the same.” That was about the time he literally ripped off his button-up shirt in some display of brute strength and started banging his head on the wall, sobbing and murmuring about being pathetic. I actually walked over and used my hand as a cushion between his forehead and the wall to get him to stop.

Meanwhile, his roommate never acknowledged what was going on around him. Not even once.”

14. Wow. Bold move.

“Came into my house last night and found a stuffed elephant sitting on the table. While I’m contemplating why the fuck there is a Babies-R-Us elephant on a plate, my now fiancee says from the doorway “I think it’s time we address the elephant in the room” and dropped to one knee with a ring box. I’m still giggling over that one.”

15. A classy guy.

“I was dating my current girlfriend in high school. Senior year, prom season came around.

In order to ask her to prom, I wrote “Prom?” on my ass and mooned her. She cried, clearly expecting something more romantic.

I still feel bad about it to this day, but we laugh about it now.”

Yikes, those are kind of painful.

How about you? Have you ever had something like this happen to you? Or maybe you were the one who got rejected?

Tell us all about it in the comments!

The post People Share the Cringeworthy Stuff Partners Did That Were Supposed to Be Romantic appeared first on UberFacts.