15 Things That Totally Scream “I Peaked in High School”

You know the kind of people I’m talking about – your still friends on Facebook, probably so you can feel good about yourself – but it definitely seems like high school was the best years of their lives.

And well, if you’re worried that might be you, you’d better check this list of 15 signs it could be.

15. Sad.

At my ten year reunion, the prom queen came wearing a tiara with a custom “Queen ’03” sash over her shoulder. I had to go outside I was laughing so hard.

But I’ll be damned if she didn’t rock that outfit the while time, so, respect.

Still sad though.

14. I can see that.

I dated a guy with his high school mascot tattooed on his arm. It was such a turnoff.

13. Or in real life.

Still bullying the “nerds” at your 10 year reunion.

12. Fast times.

Selling pot to teenagers and then trying to get them to stay and smoke with you.

11. #bossbabe

Want to earn money from home and set your own hours?

E: thank y’all for the hella love. And sorry you all have had that ‘bestie’ (read: distant acquaintance) reach out to you with a desperate sales pitch.

10. A permanent reminder.

Getting the score of the football game you won against the school’s rival tattooed on your shoulder.

9. It might be time for a new jacket.

A guy who graduated from my high school back in 2003 was arrested a few years ago for his 2nd DUI. He was wearing his Letterman jacket in his mugshot.

8. Bless your heart.

We used to play indoor floor hockey in a loft room in the big gym of my middle school. One game I scored three goals, one of them being a bank shot off the wall.

The next year I wrote about the game for an assignment in English class and the teacher read it to the class the next day.

I’m not sure which one was my peak.

7. Stay cool!

Sharing EVERY memory from Facebook talking about the “good ol days” and “wish we could go back” when it’s only been a few years since graduation.

6. Technology doesn’t help everyone.

Filming yourself running drills and throwing footballs off camera in front of your van/mobile home.

5. Why are you still here?

When I was in high school, this guy a year before me had a fearsome reputation. At house parties, people would fear him just by name alone. He would show up to parties with his cronies and start fights. He came from a decent enough family. Everybody wanted to be on his good side.

Anyway, he graduates high school, and most of us were still in 12th grade. I remember he used to come around lunctime to smoke with the people out front, shoot the breeze and talk about how much fun it is to just sleep in and do nothing and have all this freedom.

A couple of months of “Ohhh cool!” To, “Why are you still here?” as we awkwardly shuffled back to class.

4. It’s just creepy at that point.

Partying with high schoolers when you’re 30.

3. Peaking, indeed.

Billy Joel feels compelled to write a ballad about how you and your ex were the king and the queen of the prom, how the two of you married right after high school, and how it all went to hell from there.

Bonus points if your names happen to be Brenda and Eddie.

2. That’s quite a moment.

Me,

in a horrid realization,

in the back of my 92 Camaro,

while icing that knee I blew out at the championship game senior year,

reading through the divorce papers.

1. Nothing new to talk about.

Some of the popular girls from high school still get together very frequently, and you see updates of it on facebook. I also keep in touch with some friends from high school, and I think that that’s nice. However, one of those friends of mine once ran into them during one of their get-together. He said hi and happened to be sitting not too far from them at the bar.

He said that all they did for the whole night, was talk about high school. They looked up old classmates on Facebook, laughed at them, called them names, looked at their spouses and called them names too. They still thought themselves the popular kids, as if they still had some sort of influence on all these people. Everyone has moved on, done interesting things in their life except for them. They’re just rehashing old drama and old rumors.

One of those girls had a small bit of success as a photographer in high school. She won a couple contests that were aimed at teenagers and her photos aren’t bad. Her parents turned this into a very big deal, her friends all wanted to be in her photos, and she was dead set on going to art school and getting the recognition she deserved. I don’t know if she never made it into art school or if she dropped out, but she definitely did not become a photographer. Instead, you see her launching some new startup business selling asinine live-laugh-love shit about once a year.

I know high school wasn’t golden for me!

The post 15 Things That Totally Scream “I Peaked in High School” appeared first on UberFacts.

11 Husbands Share What They Do When Their Wives Are Gone

To all the ladies out there: do you know what your hubby does when you aren’t there? Think he has a secret life?

These 11 men confess that when the women are away, they will play…

Find out more…

1. Awwww, that’s sweet!

Photo Credit: Whisper

2. Actually, pretty normal feeling…

Photo Credit: Whisper

3. There ya go!

Photo Credit: Whisper

4. Damn!

Photo Credit: Whisper

5. Naughty naughty…

Photo Credit: Whisper

6. You can’t watch when she’s in town?

Photo Credit: Whisper

7. Yep. Been married too long…

Photo Credit: Whisper

8. Iron will…

Photo Credit: Whisper

9. Dad FTW!

Photo Credit: Whisper

10. Okay, she’s either going to LOVE or HATE this!

Photo Credit: Whisper

11. Get high every day…

Photo Credit: Whisper

What do you think about these hubbies? Not so bad? Violations of trust?

Let us know in the comments!

The post 11 Husbands Share What They Do When Their Wives Are Gone appeared first on UberFacts.

This Is Why an Uber Driver Pretended to Be a Female Passenger’s Boyfriend

Uber has gotten some bad press lately, but as is true with every pool of humans, there are the ones who are trash, and the ones who stand out at the top – and driver Brandon Gale is definitely one of the good guys.

He was responding to a new ride call when he noticed there was a special request attached to the pickup – the woman wanted him to pretend to be her boyfriend.

At first, he was leery. He’s a married father, after all, and wanted to know exactly what this “pretending” entailed. But once she said she just needed him to act as if he was her boyfriend picking her up and not an Uber driver, he quickly agreed.

Before he picked her up, he took the Uber and Lyft signs out of his windows, and when he arrived, he found her speaking with a man outdoors.

They exchanged hellos like old friends (or more), and once she got into his car with a smile. Once they’d left the guy behind, she breathed a sigh of relief and spilled the entire story about how he was interested, she wasn’t, but he wouldn’t get the hint and leave her alone – to the point of following her from where she’d been with a group of friends.

Brandon recounted the full story on Facebook:

UPDATE: Thank you for helping to get the word out. More people need to know that you can use the Uber and Lyft apps to…

Posted by Brandon Gale on Wednesday, July 31, 2019

Last night, while driving for Uber, I got a call to pick up a woman from over by the fair. About 30 seconds after accepting the ride, the rider sent me a message via the app.

“When you get here, can you pretend to be my boyfriend?”

I didn’t know to what capacity she meant, so I asked ,”What do you mean?”. She then said, “I just need you to act like you know me, and that you’re not my Uber driver”.

Before I got to the pickup, I took my Uber and Lyft stickers out of my window. Although I didn’t feel comfortable removing my wedding ring, I made a mental note to keep it out of eyesight. When I got there, I had my window rolled down. A man and a woman were in the front yard, talking. The woman was my fare and she set the scene immediately. She looked over and yelled, “Hi, Babe! I’ll be right there!”. I didn’t want to leave her hanging, so i shouted back, “Awesome, because I’m starving!”. I waved at the guy. He half-assedly waved back.

The ruse was complete. Thanks to me. The Mayor of Yes-And City.

She skipped to my car, got in, and we took off. Once we got out of the guy’s sight, she told me the rest of her story. She went to the fair with a bunch of friends. In that group of friends was a guy that was very forward with her and wouldn’t take no for an answer. He also had a history of being very aggressive. She thought that she could leave him behind by heading to her car, but he followed her, claiming to be a gentleman. Before they got to her car, she claimed to have lost her keys. He offered to give her a ride, and that’s when she decided to call her “boyfriend”.

This should never have had to happen. Men, learn to accept the word “no” as a response. Learn to take responsibility for your actions. Our sons are watching you and they’re learning how to treat the women in their lives by example. Lead by a better one.

Ladies, if you have the Uber or Lyft app, and you need an exit strategy, use the messaging system within the app. You can make special requests that could possibly save your life.

UPDATE: Thank you for helping to get the word out. More people need to know that you can use the Uber and Lyft apps to covertly signal for help. Protect yourselves! Also, some nearby churches, like the Berean Baptist Church, are on standby if anyone needs a safety net.

People were pleased that he went out of his way to help a young woman in need – not many questions asked – and again that he made sure to point out that those features of the Uber app are there for people to take advantage of if they need to.

 

Image Credit: Facebook

Because this was scary AF!

Image Credit: Facebook

Everybody wants to give this guy a big hug.

Image Credit: Facebook

Because dealing with that creep was the stuff of legend.

Image Credit: Facebook

All thanks to Uber… well, and Lyft

Image Credit: Facebook

He deserves a big ol’ pat on the back for being a peak human that day (and hopefully every day).

If I’m ever in trouble, I hope there’s someone around just like him.

The post This Is Why an Uber Driver Pretended to Be a Female Passenger’s Boyfriend appeared first on UberFacts.

People on Twitter Can’t Understand a Couple Who Claims They Don’t Have a “Side” of the Bed

What kind of monsters don’t have an assigned side of the bed with their partner?

The kind of monsters who are friends with journalist Jeff Stein…

In every couple, there is an unspoken agreement (and nightstand full of crap you rarely need) that sits next to the side of the bed that is “yours.” That’s just the way of things, and it’s the way it should be…except for this one couple who thinks they can just sleep willy-nilly on whichever side of the bed the feel like plopping onto on a given night.

Stein admitted that though it seemed like anarchy to him, maybe there was something to it.

Twitter was on my side, though, and basically thought those people should never speak of their strange bedroom practice again.

Because who would do this?!

It makes no sense!

Do you want chaos to reign in your bedroom?

What’s next? Cannibalism?

There really isn’t excuse for this…

They should be locked up…

Okay, maybe that was a bit extreme.

These are important questions, y’all, and idk maybe we need a follow-up interview or something.

Or maybe there are some things we just don’t want to know details on…

The post People on Twitter Can’t Understand a Couple Who Claims They Don’t Have a “Side” of the Bed appeared first on UberFacts.

This Little Girl Wasn’t Impressed by the Birthday Cake That Called Her a “Loser”

To be fair, it takes quite a bit to impress a toddler, so “unimpressed” is kind of their default. That said, you might have a shot with the right, well-executed cake on their birthday.

Which was pretty much the opposite of what mom Melin Jones ended up with when trying to get a cute cake for her daughter Liz’s 2nd birthday party.

Editing this with a little more information -Some of my family & friends know about the cake mess up we had with Liz’s…

Posted by Melin Jones on Sunday, June 30, 2019

Here’s the full text:

Some of my family & friends know about the cake mess up we had with Liz’s 2nd birthday cake but I recently posted it in a Facebook group I’m in (Sad Sales, Stolen Goods, and Sketchy Services )and had a lot of people ask me to post it to my public profile so they could share  it – so here’s the story !

September 7th, sometime in the afternoon I had went to Wal-Mart in Desloge to get things for Liz’s birthday party, which we were having that next day.

We hadn’t ordered a cake or anything days a head like one should /would normally so I swung by the bakery and picked out one that was already made, and asked the lady behind the counter if she would write “Happy Birthday Lizard.”

Lizard is our nickname for Liz. She said yes and within a few minutes she handed it back.

She didn’t ask me how it looked and I didn’t check .

Remember, I’m in a hurry here as it’s the day before her birthday party and I’m just now picking the cake out and getting everything else.

Little did I know life lessons were about to be had! We get home, I’m unloading the car and quickly glance down at the cake and noticed that the worker wrote Loser , not Lizard . At first I was a little shocked and speechless but quickly started dying laughing.

I hurried and carried the cake and Liz into the house, put the cake down on the table and put Liz in the chair to send a picture to my husband of the cake .

Liz wasn’t told to look at the cake, she can’t read so she didn’t know what the cake said, we didn’t tell her what it said and she doesn’t even know what a loser is. She just happen to be looking at the cake when I took the photo.

My husband and I laughed about it together when he got home, enjoyed every bit of the loser cake (eat up , mom of the year ! you deserve it !) and later that evening I made another trip to Wal-Mart for another cake for her party.

I never brought it to the bakery’s attention because had I took the time to just look at the cake when she handed it to me I would have never walked out the door with it and also , I didn’t want her to get into any type of trouble or be mocked by her coworkers for writing loser on a child’s birthday cake .

It was a simple misunderstanding and I didn’t want her to get any backlash from it .

This is a funny story , it’s ok to laugh . Lizard got a new cake, the idiot that couldn’t be bothered to take a few mins to stop and check it also got a cake.

I promise you my now almost 3 year old didn’t have a clue what happen. She’ll go on to live a somewhat normal life….. as long as someone else starts picking out her birthday cakes.

The good news is that Liz can’t read, so even though she looks un-enthused, she “wouldn’t know what a loser is,” her mom told the Mirror back in 2018.

Editing this with a little more information because some of the news stations have really butchered it & have false…

Posted by Melin Jones on Sunday, June 30, 2019

She also said that while the cake might have called their daughter a loser, the family was the winner.

Because the cake was delicious!

Posted by Melin Jones on Monday, July 1, 2019

“I ate every bit of that loser cake,” Melin told People magazine.

Proof that happy endings do exist, my friends!

The post This Little Girl Wasn’t Impressed by the Birthday Cake That Called Her a “Loser” appeared first on UberFacts.

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A man bought a golden egg…

A man bought a golden egg for $13,000 at a sale. It turned out it was an incredibly rare Fabergé egg, once owned by the Emperor of Russia, that had been missing since 1902. It is worth $33,300,000.

John Corcoran, a teacher, taught for…

John Corcoran, a teacher, taught for 17 years while being illiterate. He struggled in the 6th grade and never learned to read or write, and cheated his way through college. At the age of 47, he finally learned when he was inspired by Barbara Bush advocating for adult literacy.