What makes a joke funny? Well, we’re still figuring out an exact forumula, but when it comes to things like complex relationships and emotions, part of what makes you laugh is your ability to connect with the material.
And if you’ve ever been or are currently married, there’s no denying the hilarious truth in these 18 comments.
18. You have to play to your strengths.
My husband arguing with me about how much I like to argue is the spark that keeps this marriage alive.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) January 3, 2020
17. Hopefully your wife doesn’t take it to a third party.
A marriage is like a car in the sense that I have no idea what to do when it breaks down.
— WTFDAD (@daddydoubts) December 30, 2019
16. Who was more excited to see him?
My husband came home from being gone for 6 days, walked through the door & went straight to the dog.
And that’s what it’s like to be married for 20 years.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) January 6, 2020
15. She just doesn’t want you to make her mistakes, that’s all.
MIL: You have to teach them really young to pick up after themselves
Me: *watching my husband take off his socks and leave them in the middle of the living room*
— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) January 8, 2020
14. Why are they like this?
Me: Do you want to watch this show with me?
Husband: No thanks. You go ahead.
*6 episodes later*
Husband: So who's that guy? Why's he doing that? Wasn't he doing that other thing before? Hey, where are you going?
— Northern Lights
(@PinkCamoTO) December 22, 2019
13. Do it, please…not like that, though.
Marriage is 50% your wife being upset that you don't do enough chores and 50% of her yelling at you for ruining her shirt by doing the laundry.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) November 14, 2019
12. You know that it is.
I have a cold and it’s pretty bad but my wife has a husband with a cold and apparently that’s way worse.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) January 3, 2020
11. I mean he’s probably not too far off. Unless you fall asleep.
What I say to my husband: “Let’s cuddle on the couch and watch something.”
What he hears: “Let’s have sex in like 15 minutes.”
— Marriage And Martinis (@MarriageMartini) December 15, 2019
10. Outsourcing can save marriages.
Wife: Can you do something for me?
Me: Sure.
Wife: Can you do it without complaining?
Me: I'll get someone else.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 5, 2020
9. Bahaha this made me cringe and laugh at the same time.
"No means no," I remind my wife, as she eyes the pimple on my shoulder.
— The Dad Briefs
(@SladeWentworth) January 3, 2020
8. You don’t want to NAG though.
Instead of asking my husband to do something, I just casually mention 300 times that it needs to be done and hope he picks up what I’m laying down. And so far, this strategy has been wildly unsuccessful.
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) January 4, 2020
7. It happens to the best of us!
I've been married for over 16 years, I barely can remember what that thing I like is.
— Divergent Mama (@Divergentmama) December 27, 2019
6. HOW DARE HE.
My husband came home with pizza sauce on his collar and no pizza and now I know what it’s like to be cheated on.
— Maryfairyboberry (@MaryJustice86) December 28, 2019
5. Actions speak louder than words.
My husband just got back from the gym and took a nap on the freshly washed sheets and he could have just told me he wanted a divorce
— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) January 6, 2020
4. He knows where he falls in the pecking order.
Me: Oh baby I’ve been thinking about you all day
Hubs: Huh
Me: Nothing
Hubs: Are you talking dirty to the bed
Me: Maybe
— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) January 8, 2020
3. You know what she means.
Wife: You're doing it wrong.
Me: What?
Wife: *motions vaguely in the direction of my entire life*
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 6, 2020
2. At least he hasn’t changed?
My husband surprised me with a night out to celebrate the anniversary of our first date. I was reminded of the man I fell in love with.
We arrived at the theater and learned the movie was playing at a different location a full hour earlier. I was reminded of the man I married.
— She Writes Good (@GoodSheWrites) December 23, 2019
1. It is the kindest course of action.
Me: I think I’m getting sick.
Wife: Hold on, I have something for that.
Me: Okay.
Wife: [starts smothering me with a pillow]
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) January 6, 2020
Marriage is great, but also, there are some days when you really, really need to laugh about it so you don’t go screaming naked down the street.
Just me? I doubt it.
Which one of these got you the most? Tell us about it in the comments!
The post These Marriage Tweets Are Funny, Because They’re True appeared first on UberFacts.