Some days I enjoy scrolling through all the posts my friends and fellow parents put up, their kids dressed and smiling and everyone getting along.
Other days, I want to know what y’alls lives are really like, and for that, I go to Twitter – and to tweets like these 12, which remind us that no one’s life is perfect (but there’s usually humor to be found).
12. No judgement.
You’ve gotta get your kicks where you can.
They never should have let me have kids.
Take the time to randomly scream a horrible scream at quiet times to scare the shit out of your kids.
pic.twitter.com/sdzvW7Jwia
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) September 1, 2020
11. The prayer of the parents of strong-willed kids everywhere.
Don’t kill their spirit, they said…
My daughters persistence is one of her greatest qualities and it will serve her well in the future, I just hope it doesn’t kill me first.
— Rhyming Mama (@sarabellab123) August 30, 2020
10. Sounds like you’re raising him right.
You reap what you sow and all that.
I kinda fucked up my merge and I'm currently getting roasted by a 3 year old in a car seat how are you
— Village Person (@SvnSxty) August 27, 2020
9. The first lesson in “always and never” aren’t the best words.
They’ll forget it tomorrow, don’t worry.
me: eat this food
baby: never
me: the food is now an airplane
baby: “never” was a strong word
— randy (@randypaint) September 1, 2020
8. They keep you on your toes.
For better or worse.
My kid sneezes and if you aren't quick enough with "bless you" he says, "don't worry I'm okay" in the most condescending tone ever uttered by a 2 year old
— Not Another Pinterest Mom (@snarkymomtobe) August 31, 2020
7. They have a lot of questions.
And they do not care about your vanity.
Today my 4 year-old asked "when you are an adult do you have to buy a car or do they just give you one because you are old?"
Absolutely shredded by a kid who pissed his bed this morning.
— Yukon Guzman
(@GrahamKritzer) August 31, 2020
6. Hangry is a real problem.
I feel like doing that myself sometimes.
My two year old is rolling around on the ground kicking and screaming in this parking lot because she's "starving" and we "never feed her." It's the parking lot of the restaurant where we're about to eat.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) September 1, 2020
5. The milestones just keep coming.
Even if you don’t really want them to.
My kids are at the age now where we can have entire conversations using nothing but eye rolls.
— Pinky
(@mack44_d) August 31, 2020
4. That moment comes for all of us.
There’s no avoiding it; might as well celebrate.
Every time my daughter rolls her eyes at me I fantasize about the day she realizes we’re exactly alike. Boom. Genetics are a bitch.
— Rhyming Mama (@sarabellab123) September 1, 2020
3. The horror.
Mom wishes she was alone at lunch, too.
My tween is very upset about her assigned lunch hour. None of her friends are there, the food sucks, and, oh god, her mom sits at her lunch table.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) August 31, 2020
2. No explanation necessary.
It’s on hand for everyday emergencies. Like your children.
Wife: Why is the vodka out?
Me: [gesturing to kids]
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) August 30, 2020
1. You can’t be expected to perform miracles.
Even though you basically do every day.
My son and daughter are arguing over these little bouncy balls and my daughter keeps yelling “DON’T TOUCH MY BALLS STOP TOUCHING MY BALLS” and I’m only human how am I supposed to hold this laughter in what if I damage my spleen
— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) September 1, 2020
You gotta laugh to keep from crying some days, right?
What’s your favorite way to remember to smile in the midst of the chaos? Give us your tips in the comments!
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