I think that married folks are experiencing one of two situations during this crazy pandemic and lockdown: they’re either falling back in love with their spouses, or they have been secretly researching the best divorce lawyers in their area…
Hey, it’s a tough time!
But let’s hope that we can all keep our heads together for a little while longer until the world gets back to normal again, okay?
And, in the meantime, have a few laughs at these hilarious tweets about living that married life.
1. That sounds SO romantic.
Is this all you dreamed it would be?
Let’s get married and have kids so instead of a romantic dinner out one of us can eat over the sink while the other repeatedly tells a 5-year-old to “please close your sandwich.”
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) December 6, 2020
2. Things are about to get very ugly.
Why are men so obsessed with the trash and recycling?
My husband’s not going to be too happy when he sees the recycling bin is already full of Amazon boxes and pick up is still five days away.
— Nonchalant Charlotte (@jellybnbonanza) December 12, 2020
3. You have found Mr. Right.
Guys like this don’t grow on trees.
my husband saved the cheesy pizza crusts left behind by our kids in case he and i wanted snacks later and damn if he isn’t perfect in every way
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) December 12, 2020
4. Yeah, that seems about right.
That doesn’t seem like THE WORST idea in the world…
My 10-year-old told the husband in her Sims game to do a bunch of tasks and he just laid down and died, and honestly I've never seen anything more relatable in my life.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 11, 2020
5. Can we please find a middle ground here?
This is quickly spinning out of control.
It's a helluva fine line between not wanting to be a hoarder and my husband saying I need to stop throwing all his stuff in the trash.
— Stabbatha Christy (@LoveNLunchmeat) December 7, 2020
6. Sounds like he’s having a really great time.
Whether he likes it or not…
*romantically grabs husband’s face*
I will NEVER stop pointing out cows when you’re driving. NEVER.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) December 11, 2020
7. Hey o! Here’s a zinger!
Taking it all in from up high.
me: honey i shrunk the kids
wife: you’re on stilts dear
— m@thew (@TweetPotato314) December 8, 2020
8. That’ll show her who’s the boss.
Never mess with the dishwasher unless you want things to get really ugly.
I know it sounds mean but when I’m mad at my wife and want to lash out, I’ll put a whisk in the spatula drawer when I’m emptying the dishwasher.
— Boyd's Backyard
(@TheBoydP) December 3, 2020
9. Was it the mustard again?
I hate it when that happens!
Based on this delightfully surprised look on my husband’s face, I must be pretty good about not putting the caps back on things very well.
— Nonchalant Charlotte (@jellybnbonanza) December 5, 2020
10. He totally gets it now.
I hate to break it to you, but…
My husband bit his tongue twice in the same spot so he’s pretty sure he understands how painful labor must have been for me.
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) December 13, 2020
11. One more sound and we’re done here.
And I mean done FOREVER.
DATING: I could listen to you all day.
MARRIED: IF I HEAR YOU CHEW ONE MORE TIME…
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) December 2, 2020
12. I’m not sure what you’re talking about.
Now you went and made it even worse. Good job.
WIFE: I’m sick of this shit
ME: (completely aware of the shit) sick of what?
— eric (@ericsshadow) December 7, 2020
Marital bliss strikes again!
How about you? Are you and your partner getting along during the pandemic or are you driving each other crazy?
Talk to us in the comments and give us a life update.
The post Funny Tweets About Marriage That Are Right on the Money appeared first on UberFacts.