One of the best things about Twitter is how funny it can be and how absolutely RANDOM it is.
I guess it’s because Twitter is just one huge melting pot of every kind of personality and character out there in this crazy world that we live in. So we get to enjoy this sort of stream of consciousness from all kinds of folks who we’d never get to interact with in real life.
And that’s a good thing. Because variety is the spice of life, as they say…
So enjoy these funny and RANDOM tweets that we think will bring a smile to your face.
1. That sounds like a terrible idea.
What were you thinking?!?!
ME: Oh no I snapped my chopstick
WIFE: I don't know why you dont just use toilet paper
— mo (@chuuew) July 29, 2020
2. Every day is Groundhog Day right now.
When will it change…?
Tomorrow is August 1st of March 2020. It will be the same as every other day.
— incorrigible mozart goose (offline until 11/4) (@_jazzghost_) July 31, 2020
3. This is what a tweet should look like.
Just in case you were wondering.
When you Excel they spreadsheet about you
— KRUEGER (@KRUEGERXVI) July 29, 2020
4. It’s a lot of fun!
At least some of the time…
the human body is just amazing like how cool is it that I can fit way more food in my mouth when I’m sad
— someweirdpumpkingirl.
(@minkpinkustink) July 30, 2020
5. This is really frustrating.
You have to keep those pizza plants under control.
absolutely infuriated by how large pizza grows if it’s not properly harvested pic.twitter.com/4193657I58
— bIake (@jalapeno_pants) July 29, 2020
6. I can’t handle that right now.
I’m very fragile, okay?
my mental state is: if u give me a hug for too long i will start crying.
— convictsm (@andr_septian) April 16, 2020
7. The absolute peak of marriage.
Let’s go take a look at those shelves again!
We put new shelves in the garage and have talked for 3 days about what a game changer they are. This is peak marriage.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) February 22, 2019
8. I think Jesus can handle that.
No problem at all!
Bartender: I’m cutting you off. only water from now on
Jesus: [sarcastically] oh no
— Abbie (@AbbieEvansXO) February 12, 2019
9. The eagle was THIS close.
And that darn hyena had to ruin it.
[boarding the ark]
Noah: Name?
Bold Eagle: Bold Eagle
Hyena, from the back: more like BALD eagle lmao
Owls: lmao
Noah: lmao *marks down bald eagle*
— Kyle
(@KylePlantEmoji) June 8, 2018
10. No. The other way!
Not a lot of hope for this person.
murderer: run if you want to live
me: *starts sprinting*
murderer: not like toward me tho
— m@thew’s ghost (@TweetPotato314) February 15, 2019
11. This is embarrassing.
And I like that he didn’t correct you for three years.
I have lived next to the same guy for 3 years. Thought his name was Steve. I call him Steve. His name is Steve in my phone. I’ve been to his apartment. We’ve had dinner.
His name is Brian. His dog is Steve
— A Raider in PA (@ChetraiderATL) April 11, 2019
12. We need to talk about this.
A serious issue.
BUILDING INSPECTOR: Well, you say you’ve kept everything up to code, but I’ve been speaking with your 4 year old and he informed me the floor is actually lava, which—I don’t need to tell you—is a pretty serious safety violation.
— MehGyver (@TheAndrewNadeau) April 23, 2018
13. That’s not appropriate.
Just don’t ever tell him the truth.
SON: Can we have ice cream for dinner?
ME: [already ate all the ice cream for breakfast] Sorry kid, that's not a proper meal— mo (@chuuew) August 29, 2019
Now it’s your turn!
In the comments, please share some funny things you’ve seen on social media lately: memes, tweets, jokes, photos, etc.
Let’s see what ya got, friends!
The post Funny Tweets About All Kinds of Random Stuff appeared first on UberFacts.