I don’t know what you want from me. I’m just here to deliver the news that we’re giving our dogs mullets now, and there’s nothing you can do about it, so you might as well accept it.
Come to a place of acceptance and then join us all on Instagram with pics of proof and the hashtag #DogMullet. It’s gonna be ok. It’s gonna be fun.
Here, I’ll give you some examples. Here are some dogs with mullets, accompanied by randomly generated lyrics from non-existent rock songs to set the mood.
10. Sadie
“Look him just in the eyes
Wanna grab him by the hair
Wanna hug him and squeeze his tiny fists
Raven hair, raven hair”
9. Ol’ Chuck
“I want to live a life that’s always worth living
I want to fight for country and been country bound
I want to ride and drink and some gin and sharp bros
Just a lost boy and a pretty girl”
8. Darlene
“As our home back then
We watched the stars descend
Yeah, home at night
When the dogs come home”
7. Sammie
“I let down my hair and shine my shoes
I close my eyes and feel the cold
Cold beer in my hand
God gave moses a little beer”
6. Rex
“We got that old tan and tuxedo leather
We got that old tan and tuxedo leather
We got that old tan and tuxedo leather
When the mice and men walked in”
5. Barber-Jo
“Being that she gives so much, he takes for what she gives
Blowing up in the veins of an aching, craving man
Oh my old heart
Oh my old heart”
4. Charlie
“Might just go out to eat, when I hop on the road
Might just go out to eat, when I hop on the road
And sweet nothings
Open mouth closed”
3. Pabst
“I am drinkin, we are dancers
I am drinkin, we are liars
Were in this club
Are you drinkin, babe”
2. Rufus
“I was raised on the right side
Then I spent all night alone
Keep your hopes on the right side baby
Keep your fires on the right side baby”
1. Donny
“Cold summer night
In a cold summer night
Yeah, I turn up before the sundown
Summer swings every month night”
It’s really, truly inspiring.
What haircut should we start trying on dogs next?
Tell us in the comments.
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