Category: Social

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People Share Tweets So Entertaining You Might Jump for Joy

Might as well jump!

Man, now I really want to listen to some Van Halen…

But instead of doing that, we’re going to enjoy and then laugh at some hilarious tweets from the wordsmiths out there on Twitter. And there are a whole lot of them, trust me…

So are you ready to jump for joy AND get your laugh on?

Let’s get it going right this instant!

1. This is a universal mom thing.

I know I’ve seen it on many occasions.

2. This is the most accurate tweet I’ve ever seen.

You know it’s true!

3. Those folks are in for a surprise.

Never heard of something like this before.

4. A little paranoid, are we?

Am I dying? What is this?

5. That is infuriating.

Just throw the whole thing away.

6. What do you think?

Now you’ve upset me greatly.

7. What are you doing on here?

Well, this is depressing.

8. I would be living in fear, too…

What does it all mean?!?!

9. That was a big introduction to this lucky fella.

Can’t wait to see the rest of him!

10. Classic Dad joke, right here.

Another zinger from Pops! Boom!

11. Seriously, that’s his problem.

I’m with you on this one.

12. That was a close call.

What’s that creepy sound…?

How about you, ladies and gentlemen?

Have you seen anything particularly hilarious lately?

We’re talking about memes, tweets, jokes, photos, etc. You know, all the good stuff that keeps us laughing during these trying times.

If so, please share them with us in the comments. Thanks!

The post People Share Tweets So Entertaining You Might Jump for Joy appeared first on UberFacts.

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Random Tweets That Made Us Seriously Chuckle

Get ready to smile and get ready to possibly even GUFFAW.

Yeah, that’s right, we’re here today to make you laugh your butt off with some carefully curated tweets that we are 100% positive will brighten your day in a major way.

What else can you ask for, really?

So let’s jump in feet first and let the laughing begin! Enjoy!

1. This wasn’t part of the deal.

Hold on just a second!

2. They really need to figure that out someday.

It is quite ugly.

3. This is very true.

Put that down and back away. Slowly.

4. That doesn’t sound like a real excuse.

Are you trying to get one over on me?

5. Good question…

Let’s sit down and try to talk this one out.

6. You are really something else!

Did you just hear that?!?!

7. I think it’s the big one on the left.

But that’s just a guess.

8. That’s the way it works.

Don’t let your friend down, okay?

9. That’s a good life plan.

I’m on board with you!

10. Wow. That is a total disaster.

Well, now you’re stuck with it.

11. Those don’t seem like a good idea.

We need OPEN AIR, people.

12. Seriously, make it worth his while.

This is a really good point.

Those sure hit the spot!

And now we want to hear from you.

In the comments, share some funny stuff that you’ve seen on social media lately.

We want memes, tweets, jokes, photos, etc.

Do you think you got some good stuff for us! Well, bring it on!

Please and thank you!

The post Random Tweets That Made Us Seriously Chuckle appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Share Stories About When Someone Challenged Them at Something They Were an Expert At

Have you ever bit off more than you can chew? If so, you know that it’s never a good feeling when a person who is highly skilled at one specific thing rubs it in your face and makes you look like an idiot in front of a group of people?

Or, maybe the opposite thing happened and YOU were the one who was an expert at something and you got to throw it in someone’s face?

Do these situations sound familiar?

Let’s see what AskReddit users had to say.

1. Didn’t see that coming.

“Medieval Faire, 2002.

Carnie running the fencing game picks me out of the crowd for being tall, and challenges me to a free bout against “The Master”.

Not a lot of people fence, so his gambit probably worked most of the time, but when he handed me that saber, I handed him his *ss.”

2. See you on the court.

“A guy from work challenged me to a tennis match.

He must’ve been a hotshot back in his day and tbf as far as mid 40’s go he wasn’t bad.

I however was national team, whooped his *ss 6-0, 6-0. I would’ve eased up but when I warned him I’m pretty good, he laughed it off.”

3. Movie buff.

“Went to a couples night once and the guy had wall to wall movies and framed posters in his basement, super into it.

Mentioned I used to be a movie nerd but not so much anymore. He challenged us to a movie trivia board game, kinda in a condescending way and I tried to politely decline but my gf insisted we play.

They went first, missed the question then we ran the table. Never heard from them again.”

4. Chess match.

“I’ve played chess since I was young and was the best player in the middle school chess club.

The guy who owned the pool hall me and my juvenile delinquent friends hung out at was talking about how dumb kids are these days and said nobody in my group of hoodlums could play chess.

I beat him soundly, then again in the rematch.”

5. Pitch perfect.

“I have perfect pitch.

It’s not a thing I can turn off, notes simply ARE a pitch clear as day, much like how red is clearly distinct from green.

Any who, music class in junior high. Teacher explains that Mozart had perfect pitch and walks over to the piano, plays a note and says “and just by hearing it, he’d be able to tell you what now that was… now can any of YOU do that?”

At the time, I honestly had no idea this was rare. Raise hand, teacher with a smug look points and me and is gobsmacked when I answer correctly with note and octave. Figures it’s pure luck so does it again and asks me to face the other way. I answer correctly again.

Tries it with chords, sequences and two hands worth of notes. Still right every time. Ends with me playing back a short sequence after listening to it blind.

That day, I learned that perfect pitch is actually kind of rare.”

6. Showed him.

“My father in law challenged me about the capabilities of DVD. Specifically he claimed that you could only have widescreen video (not 4:3) on a DVD disc.

At the time I was employed as a DVD author. I authored the very first commercially available feature on Scenarist. I am literally acknowledged in the first edition of “DVD Demystified” as an expert. I had already by that time personally authored literally hundreds of DVD’s with 4:3 video.

He knew all of the above at the time, yet still insisted I was wrong.”

7. Don’t even try.

“For most of 2020 so far.

I am an infectious disease expert (PhD from a Microbiology and Immunology program) and suddenly all my former high school classmates think they know more than me.

They watch the news and learn a new vocabulary, and they bestow themselves a doctorate.”

8. Big-time gamer.

“I used to play fighting games competitively all over the world. Never made one of the top slots but I could usually hold my own. One of my best game was Super Street Fighter 2.

Went to a bar by work one day and they just so happened to have an SNES set up with SF2. I order a drink, pick random characters and just f*ck around for a bit. Some guy comes in and immediately starts bragging to his date that he’s the best SF2 player ever.

I asked him to play some games against me and offered to buy him a drink if he could beat 2 out of 3. Twelve games later I am completed hammered and he finally gives up and leaves.

Still don’t remember getting home that night.”

9. I bet this happens all the time.

“So it’s the Saturday after Thanksgiving a few years ago and I’m out with one of my old college friends and her extended family. We had just graduated the year before.

We post up at a bar outside for the game, everyone’s pleasantly mid-afternoon buzzed. Her uncle, whom I hadn’t met previously, asked what I do. I hated answering this question in 2017, especially with middle-aged adults, because they would invariably try to start something.

At the time, I worked at an immigration law firm. Predictably, as soon as I tell him this, he asks what I think about the wall, etc. I give him my usual answer “bipartisan immigration reform, Gang of Eight, etc.” He tells me not to give him the rehearsed crap, he wants to hear what I really think. I say Oh I don’t really want to get into it, let’s enjoy the game.”

But he keeps pushing and I’ve had a couple beers, so against my better judgment, I engage. This maybe 50 year old man becomes FURIOUS as the discussion carries on because I keep citing court cases and how our immigration system actually works.

The kicker is at one point he says “Just because you have all these statistics and citations doesn’t mean you know any better than me.” I just gave up and got another beer after that.”

10. Let me show you how it’s done.

“Not me but my friend used to ride a unicycle as a kid. He worked construction and they were working at a house that had an old unicycle

The other workers tried riding it and immediately fell off. My friend walked over to it and inspected the unicycle like it was the first time he ever saw one them said it didn’t look that difficult.

They all laughed at him and he said he thought he could ride it. Eventually one of them bet him $100 he couldn’t ride it. He jumped on it and immediately rode down the street.”

11. Duel.

“When we were having a couple drinks on friday after work, I was challenged to a shooting, by a colleague. Little did he know I’ve been shooting air rifles competitively ever since I was thirteen.

Not to say I am the greatest, but I’ve made it to the national finals for my country multiple times, and came third and sixth. I have all the special clothes and gear and such you need to make it to such a level.

The next day, saturday, we showed up to the range i always shoot at. Its not a day I usually train so not many people recognize me. I beat his *ss left right and center that day. Out of 600 points, he scored about 200-250 if i remember correctly. I got about 580 which was about average of what I used to shoot.

He had to buy me a fancy bottle of whisky and now we shoot every two or three weeks together. Fun times.”

12. It works.

“Far from an expert. Far from proficient.

But I’ve been told Jiu Jitsu doesn’t work by several froggy drunk dudes.

It works. It always works.”

13. Don’t mess with me.

“The property management company for my homeowner’s association insisted that I had received emails that I never received. So I asked them to prove that I had received them. They said they’re sure I received them.

I’m a software engineer and at the time I had just finished an enterprise email delivery system (like an in-house Constant Contact). I knew the rules of the CAN-SPAM Act by heart. I KNEW exactly how their system worked.

So this real b*tch of a property manager said “I know how email works. You wouldn’t understand.” I mentally did the arrogant knuckle crack and started to explain – very methodically – how email delivery works and how they’d track various actions.

I spent about five minutes detailing my credentials and why I was absolutely certain they had never sent me the emails they alleged I received. When I was finished, the HOA board just agreed to waive the fines.”

Has something like this ever happened to you?

If so, please tell us about it in the comments.

Thanks a lot!

The post People Share Stories About When Someone Challenged Them at Something They Were an Expert At appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Talk About Weird Quirks Their Bodies Have

We all have weird quirks with our bodies.

Some of us are double-jointed, some of us have webbed toes, and others have birthmarks that look like Elvis.

The possibilities are endless!

But they’re all unique in special in their own way…and also kind of weird.

Let’s get weird with some folks on AskReddit.

1. Blurred vision.

“I can blur my vision at will.

Apparently some people can and some can’t. Means we can see those 3D eye puzzles immediately by just changing our vision. Has something to do with depth of focus.

Also great for watching horror movies or graphic scenes. Looks like I’m watching but everything is blurred. It’s like a visual censor switch.”

2. Check this out.

“My spine is about 2 inches to the left of where it should be in my lower back.

Cool party trick.”

3. Interesting…

“I only sweat on one side of my face and have a green eye and a blue one.

It’s called Horner’s syndrome, had it since birth.”

4. A new thing.

“Several years ago I underwent bariatric surgery.

Ever since shortly after I eat I peel off a series of strong sneezes.

Apparently it’s called “gustatory rhinitis”. Never had that pre-surgery.”

5. Are you human?

“I can spread all of my toes out really far from each other, with none of them touching at all.

It sounds insignificant, but every person I show ends up giving me a big reaction.”

6. Some eye issues.

“My eyes are not level.

Makes sunglasses look crooked and hard to trim sideburns evenly.

Also my right eye tear duct weeps sometimes.”

7. To the right.

“My head is tilted to the right (by default lol not that I can’t tilt it to the other side, it’s just my normal resting position).

My parents told me that’s how it’s been since I was a baby. No problems with bones or muscles as they’ve had it checked for years.

Doctors say it might be caused by a muscle in my eye which makes me tilt my head to see lines as straight.

I’ve never met anyone with the same case.”

8. Thumbs.

“I was born with an extra thumb on my right hand.

Unfortunately it was removed because it wasn’t functional and hindered the other thumb, but the remaining thumb is very strangely shaped and has a gnarly scar.

It’s also mostly not functional.”

9. You’re lucky!

“I can eat anything I want and I don’t really seem to gain weight or get fat.

I’m almost 40, still eating donuts and pizza whenever I want, still crushing bags of candies and chips every night and still have a 6 pack and look better now than I did when I was in the gym 4-5 days a week in my 20’s. My body seems to have learned how to process junk food like it’s clean protein.

People think it’s odd and make comments about it pretty often when they see me eat. I get a kick out of their confusion and curiosity. My BIL’s professional medical opinion is that I have a false leg.

All my blood work comes back great on an annual basis too.”

10. Like a superpower.

“I heal surprisingly fast.

Wipe out on skateboard and get nasty, deep scrapes? Gone with a scar in a week or two.

Cut my finger? Fold the skin back over, don’t touch it, healed overnight”

11. Ahhhhh!

“I was born without a uvula and I can spit out of my nose through a hole in the front of my mouth.”

12. That’s annoying.

“I aggressively sneeze during and after every hot shower for at least 45 minutes straight.

It’s horrible.”

13. Crackin’ and poppin’.

“All of my joints crack, pop and grind.

I sound like a glowstick all the time, especially if I’ve been sitting for more than ten minutes.”

14. Pitch black.

“I have really good eyesight in the dark, like I couldn’t read a book in pitch darkness but I could see stuff.

It p*sses my fiancée off as I’ll walk into a room at night and everything’s pretty much visible so I don’t turn a light on.

If we’re going to bed and I do this she then follows expecting me to have turned the lamp on but nope because I think it’s pretty light still and then she ends up tripping over something because apparently it’s really dark 😂”

15. Unusual.

“I can sleep while standing up.

I found this out during a summer bridge program I went to the summer before I started college. The counselors told us to stand up in the back if we ever got tired during class.

Little did I know just how tired I was going to get.”

Does your body have any odd quirks?

If so, please tell us about them in the comments.

We can’t wait to hear from you!

The post People Talk About Weird Quirks Their Bodies Have appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Discuss the Worst Financial Decisions They’ve Seen Folks Make

I hate these kinds of stories.

I’m talking about the ones where people blow all their hard-earned money either through a scam, recklessness, or just plain bad luck. And, sadly, it happens all the time.

AskReddit users talked about the worst financial decisions they’ve ever seen.

1. Ouch!

“A private company announced a special dividend to all shareholders as of date of record one-month in the future. $1.30/share dividend.

There was an option holder with 300,000 options at a $0.10 strike price.

He did not exercise them. Had he exercised his options for $30,000, he would have been paid $390,000 the following month.”

2. Some people…

“I used to work for a company with an actuarial Department. There was a lovely young woman working in the call center with a masters degree in data science.

She was constantly talking about how frustrated she was with making $16/hour in a call center when she had a masters degree in data science, yet no matter how many times I told her to apply to the actuarial team she wouldn’t do so. The actuarial team was HUGE about promoting within.

I saw many people who wanted to learn more about what they do who had no experience whatsoever get excepted into the team because they wanted to learn. This girl was a shoo-in. And yet she never even tried despite the fact that there were always openings.

She also shared with me that she was $180k in debt for that master’s degree. Last time I checked in with her she had left the job completely and is now in school for art. (Insert facepalm emoji here.)

But my favorite was before I was even an accountant. I worked for a small CPA firm as a receptionist during tax time. I saw a full-grown woman sit down on the floor and start crying because she owed $900 in taxes that year when she had made about $150k that year.

I rolled my eyes so hard that I hurt myself. Later that day I had a guy who owed $750k to the IRS and said “woohoo! That’s way less than last year!””

3. Sad stories.

“The client who joined an MLM and racked up half a million dollars worth of losses before finally listening to us and quitting.

The client who spent $40k on Farmville over 3 months.

The clients who give their adult children allowances that exceed my salary, fancy cars, and houses without expecting them to ever hold down a job themselves.”

4. Bad idea, sir.

“Watched a client walk out of my office after I explained the risk in liquidating his 401K to start his own business.

He started it with no management experience or business model, real “fly by the seat of his pants” kinda guy. Wanted to start a career flipping houses in a college town, turn them into upscale rentals.

Did it in a bad neighborhood and lost EVERYTHING.”

5. Oops!

“My brother had a long standing client of around 10 years get married after only knowing a woman for 12 months. He was almost 55, she was in her early 30s.

55 y.o. man wanted to add her as a signatory on his retirement account. Basically giving her 100% power over the account. A quick soft credit check showed she was not good with money.

My brother offered up many different options as to how to give her access to the money but with limitations. He even straight up refused to do it, saying that he needed to think about it for a few days.

The guy came back in the next morning saying he would file a complaint against him if he didn’t set it up. My brother said that he would need to get the documents notarized, and sign a waiver that this is against the institutions advice.

The guy comes back in later that day and finalizes the deal.

You can guess what happened within about 6 months.

The account had around 600k in it to begin with, and she had managed to run off with about 65k before the account was frozen by my brother for review of withdrawls.

The man was f*ckin p*ssed and tried to lawyer up twice. Neither time did it even go to court.

His advice is that if you are married and have investment accounts, just keep them separate unless you REALLY have a reason to give them access.

You can totally notify the agency about your marriage, and sometimes in certain situations the spouse can get limited info confirmed for medical bills and such.”

6. Terrible decisions.

“Making over $250k (sometimes WELL over), no withholding, not paying estimated taxes throughout the year, can’t afford the tax bill with the return EVERY YEAR, then b*tching because they can’t afford the installment payments on the taxes they owe from two years ago.

Sell your gaudy McMansion, take your teenage daughter’s credit card away, let your drunk driving son stay in jail and get a public defender, and tell your b*tch wife to stop spending all day at the tennis courts sipping mimosas.

Get your sh*t together and pay taxes throughout the year like the rest of us. You aren’t being persecuted by the IRS, you’re just an idiot.”

7. Wow.

“I work for a bank. One of our branches had a customer who was basically homeless. Then, he wins the lottery!

Over the next few months, the staff watched him come in to withdraw thousands of dollars every day to spend on extravagances. Everyone tried to convince him to sit with a financial advisor to help him make the most of his money.

Less than a year later, he’s in slightly better shape than when he started; he’s at least able to live in the car he bought.”

8. Come on!

“I’ve had a client where I noticed this guy’s credit debt always remained hovering $13k to $15k… I asked him why he only makes minimum payments on his credit card instead of paying it off, because I see he has roughly $11k sitting in a bank account.

Interest per month on that credit card bill is roughly $250, and according to his repayment patterns it will take him roughly 19 years to pay it all off.

His answer to me is the bank charges him $7.99 per month for his bank account if his balance dips below $10k… So to save the $7.99 per month this guy is paying $250 in interest on his credit card.”

9. Gotta do your research.

“What I’ve seen, countless times, is someone who started a business with ZERO research, no understanding of what running a business involves. (Here’s a hint: practically every business involves paperwork and deadlines.).

The business models come in waves… for a while it was Barbecue shacks, then it was cupcakes, then house flippers, then food trucks. I think they see it being done on TV shows that make it look fun. It isn’t fun when they come to me with debt, tax levies and lawsuits. IRS and state labor department and health department on their backs, and suppliers taking them to court for unpaid bills.

Some of them cashed out their retirement account to buy a business; others put their house up as collateral for an SBA loan. it’s a nightmare. If they had come to an accountant first, we might be able to help them (or even better, dissuade then).

I usually see them after 18-24 months of screwups and by then it’s usually too late to rescue them.”

10. Those fees add up.

“I’m a banker. Banks charge fees for using other bank’s ATMs.

I had a customer that would check his balance and then do withdrawals daily at a foreign ATM. Guy did not have a lot of money to begin with and because he did this, would overdraw his account and get slapped with an overdraft fee which put him in the hole further.

We ended up taking away his ability to overdraw his account. Dude was p*ssed but it helped right the ship a little.”

11. All gone.

“Bank advisor here, a customer got an inheritance, about 200.000€, and just spent in like 2 years, not investing it or putting into a savings account.

Didn’t even buy something big like a car our part of a house, just spent too much every month for two years and it was gone”

12. The car game.

“Claims Adjuster here, and I see it happen all too often – trading in vehicles with negative equity.

Why? Why can’t you be financially responsible and pay off your vehicle instead of rolling the leftover loan onto that new shiny machine you just can’t resist, and rinse/repeat a couple of years later. Your loan is just getting bigger and bigger.

I had one client (recent, otherwise I had more than that) – who totaled his vehicle. He blew past a stop sign and collided with another vehicle. Guess what friend, out of that $70,000 you still owe to the bank because you’ve traded in 4,5 vehicles over the years – we are only covering you for what your current vehicle is worth today, around $25,000 or whatever it was .

Depreciation applies unless you have the proper endorsement in place. That means you will be paying the bank for the leftover loans of some vehicles, none of which you own.

Own one vehicle, one loan – if you ever totaled your vehicle, insurance will provide you enough to cover the loan. If it doesn’t quite cover it because of high interest, it sure as hell isn’t a $45k loan left.”

13. Listen to your accountant.

“Best friend is a CPA, and when he had his own practice, he had some pretty big-name clients (Senators, musicians, pro athletes, etc.).

One of the biggest mistakes people made were thinking they were smarter than an accountant. His biggest challenge were the people who heard about the “sovereign citizen” nonsense. To no one’s surprise, a random guy on YouTube doesn’t know more than an actual CPA with 40+ years experience.

At least a few of these new-found “sovereign citizens” ended up doing time for tax evasion.”

Have you ever seen someone make a really terrible financial decision?

If so, please tell us about it in the comments.

We’d love to hear from you!

The post People Discuss the Worst Financial Decisions They’ve Seen Folks Make appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Who Grew up With Very Religious Parents Talk About Their Experiences

Religious extremism has always kind of scared me.

I’m all for people having their beliefs and worshipping the way they want to, but when those beliefs become extreme and it starts to affect the folks around you, that’s when there’s a problem.

And it seems like more people than you probably think actually grew up this way.

Let’s take a look at some interesting stories from folks on AskReddit.

1. Out the door.

“Let the beatings commence.

Spanked, paddled, whipped, and beaten for minor offenses.

That’s why I joined the military to get away from that nonsense.”

2. In retrospect…

“Terrifying in retrospect, but I didn’t realize it at the time.

You just start to think that all the bullsh*t that’s going on around you is normal, and then when you start meeting people in the real world outside of the religious bubble you slowly start realizing how f*cked up everything was.”

3. Cult-like.

“Grew up in a non-denominational Christian Church. The resemblance it had to a cult didn’t really dawn on me til I was older, probably 14-16.

My parents were the stereotypical helicopter parents- watched our every move, put screen mirroring apps on the very first cell phone we were ever given at age 16, shaming the hell out of us for what they would find on our phones talking to our secret girlfriends, etc.

Our church was full of families with 7+ children, the largest family having 12 kids and single mom (the dad was in jail for molesting some of the eldest girls). Out of a population of about 5-600, me and my sister were the only kids enrolled in public school, because mom was a school teacher. As a teenager, life was absolutely miserable.

Around the age of 14 I decided I hated Christianity and the absolute perversion and abuse of power this church was capable of inflicting upon me. One suicide attempt and psych ward trip later, around the age of 16, I decided I was done with the church punishing me, I decided if I couldn’t escape my parents house physically, then I would escape it mentally.

This led me to start using drugs of any sort. I started drinking cough medicine and smoking weed. Fast forward a few months, I started chemistry and synthesized multiple plant-derived psychedelics in my room. This led me to overdose and panic and have a second psych ward trip. After the church hears of this, they expelled me from the congregation. (They also expelled multiple people for being gay and all sorts of other lovely things)

Long term, I’m now almost 21 and I’m not gonna lie I have a substance problem. I think there’s some very deep emotional scarring I’ll never be able to completely deal with. I’m trying to stop my substance abuse issue and turn my life around for the better, but after being so bright in high school I feel like a retard now from all of the oxys.

My goal now is to go to trade school and get certified in welding, hopefully make a pretty ok life for myself. I wanted to go to college, but I have a few drug charges on my record, so I’ve pretty much abandoned hope of an easy future. I know I’ve f*cked up my life a lot, I’ll be honest it’s hard.

I think about suicide often, but I want to give life one last clean try for I abandon all hope. If it doesn’t work out and I wind up homeless, I do plan to kill myself. I’d rather be dead than homeless.”

4. Growing up Mormon.

“Grew up hardcore Mormon. I’d like to stress that my childhood isnt as common for other Mormon kids.

Most of the time Mormons are fairly understanding and loving to their kids. BUT, the mormon culture does promote the mentality my parents had.

When I was growing up I wasnt punished like some others here. I was spanked, and experienced the belt but that isnt why I have some psychological problems now. The real punishment was shame. From the earliest age I can remember (around six) I was told that I was lazy and I was pissing my life away (This was the strongest language my father would use).

When I first heard the word s*x, around eleven, I looked it up on the family computer. I was a pervert from then on, and had to talk to the bishop every month for a checkup. Hell, in every school I went to my parents told school counselors that I wasnt allowed on computers because I might look up pictures of naked women. (I never did this)

This is just the sparknotes version but I internalized the shame. Being so young I just accepted that I was what my father called me and hated myself for it. I was a lazy faliure at six, I was a pervert at eleven. It didnt stop me from doing any of the things I was doing before, I just learned to fear my fathers footsteps as if it was the devil himself walking down the hallway.

I lived my life in the brief intervals between punishments. I am still not beyond this at 24 years old.”

5. A bad situation.

“Oh, where to start?

Spankings that were borderline beatings for every offense. I wasn’t allowed to “talk back” at all. Asking “why?” Was talking back. I spent my entire childhood believing that all my problems were because I didn’t love god enough.

When I was 9, I was convinced that if I didn’t shape up, God was going to kill me. So I spent six months being a perfect angel but also living in constant terror. Just completely convinced that if I did one thing wrong, lightning would blow me off the planet.

Last thing I’ll mention is how my parents wouldn’t feed me as a child if I talked back. Many many nights I was sent home with no food for the most minor of infractions. (Finishing a chore a minute or two late)

They have largely turned things around. And even apologized for some of these actions. But I still have no interest in talking to them.”

6. Strict.

“Very religious parents, we have to abstain from eating onions, meat and garlic for nine days twice a year.

My parents always think that their religion is the best they sometimes criticize other religions.

The think homos*xuality is a sin.

My mother wants me to stop eating non-vegetarian food after I get married

I’m only allowed to eat Non- veg on Sunday, Friday and Saturday

My mother frowns when I tell her that I dont believe in god.

Yes, I’m Hindu.”

7. Still working on it.

“Was forced to attend a Christian cult for years. I told my parents every single time that I’m an atheist. Didn’t matter, had to go.

Couldn’t sleep, couldn’t study, they burned my books, couldn’t go out, so I was literally confined in my room with absolutely nothing. I had a bed and a wardrobe and clothes. No music, no drawing, no reading, no PC because only my little brother could use the computer.

I was studying programming in high school ffs. Had to hand-in my homework written on a paper instead of programmed in various languages.

Shamed me for being a woman. Shamed my body. Made me think I’m stupid. The “Pastor” kept saying how he sees god’s light on my face and how I’m clearly a devout Christian. I was thinking how to…uhm… evil stuff evil stuff… anyway not so nice thoughts about him during these conversations so yeah I don’t think he saw what was really in my mind.

Almost snapped. That would have ended in a sad, messy way. Thankfully I was banned, most likely because in the end I let my true thoughts show on my face. Claimed it was because they saw me walking with a boy or some other bullsh*t. I think they realised I’m not a sheep like the rest but a bloody angry wolf. Don’t try to indoctrinate the psychopath.

I left my family, moved a few thousand kilometers away, I have a great job, a great husband (he knows all my past), travelling constantly with my BOOKS. Yeah I love my books. Noone will ever take them again. I’m planning on building my own tiny library with a mahogany desk and heavy drapery on the windows.

Also I learnt I’m not stupid (quite the opposite) and I’m not that ashamed if my body anymore. My brain still have some trauma to work through. But I might even be a completely normal human in time!”

8. Homeschooled.

“I wasn’t in a true cult but I was homeschooled for religious reasons.

Mom replaced the word “millions” with “thousands” in our history/science books. Words like “liberal” and “democrat” and “secular” and “muslim” were insults, deserving mockery and shame. Went to church 3-4 times a week, mission trips every year.

Didn’t do Halloween (but always had “fall festivals”) or Easter Bunny or Santa. We weren’t allowed to say “holy cow” or “holy smokes” because only God is holy. Couldn’t watch Disney movies because of the “follow your heart” messaging, since the human heart is evil, it’s God’s heart we should follow (and also cuz Eisner supported equal rights).

No Pokemon because of “evolution” and a Satanic Panic fear that they were based on Japanese demons.

I’m 30 now and ashamed of the person I was, but I try not to be too hard on myself… It wasn’t all my fault. I was a Bible thumping Republican until late in college, and even though I’m an entirely different person, I still encounter chunks of bullsh*t in my psyche that I try to pluck out.

Therapy and reading and introspection and travel and empathy will do a lot! But we’re all on a journey…”

9. Demonic!

“All non-Christian gospel music was considered demonic. All fantasy was demonic.

I couldn’t watch how to train your dragon because it might as well be how to train your demon. Any time I acted up, it was because of the demons either influencing me or in me.

Church every day gets a little old after a while too.”

10. Irritating.

“My mom is a devout mormon. I was forced to pretend to believe in their church for 18 years.

I moved out a few months ago, she knows I don’t attend but she doesn’t know how far away I have distanced myself from that church.

She still calls me every week saying she’s trying to find out who my bishop is so they can send people to bring me to church with them. It’s like leading a double life but she’s micromanaging my religious beliefs from 4 hours away.

I love my mom but Jesus Christ does the Mormon lifestyle irritate me.”

11. Satanic Panic.

“It was Hell, and now I’m an athiest. We were raised in the Satanic Panic era in a Full Gospel Pentacostal church where people spoke in tongues, slithered on the floor like a snake, and fainted ( I guess thats what you call it).

We were only allowed stay overnight with friends whos family were from the same church. Only permitted to watch Rated G and PG movies. Not allowed to watch The Smurfs because they were satanic. We and other members of the church would stand on the side of the road in town and preach over a sound system to the teenagers cruising on Friday and Saturday nights.

We were forced to go to church every Wednesday night and morning and evening service on Sunday. Our stepdad was a deacon and later was “called to preach”. He beat the hell out of us on a regular basis and molested my sister. Beatings were so bad we were told no to dress out at PE in school because he didnt want anyone to see the bruises.

We were basically his slaves. We were forced to work our entire childhood. If we were caught with Rock and Roll music, it was burned. He later left my mom for another deacon’s wife which is why im not in prison because I had future plans to kill him once i got older.

There were four of us kids, one has since commited suicide, one is a crack head, my sister and her husband are very wealthy and i am a police officer. Hitler is still alive but he is paying for all of the abuse he put us through.”

12. Looks good from the outside.

“Having religious extremist parents is having a family that looks good from the outside, but is completely broken on the inside.

Having religious extremist parents is having your mother “obey” your father because that’s the only advice their pastor gave for marriage counseling. Having religious extremist parents is being told from an early age that all you’re going to do as a woman is graduate high school, get married, have a bunch of children for god and obey your husband.

Having religious extremist parents is being pulled out of school so they can “instill the proper values and beliefs”. Having religious extremist parents is being gaslit CONSTANTLY. Brain washed CONSTANTLY. Not being allowed your own views.

Having religious extremist parents is being told to not be “vain” so you spend every minute telling yourself not to feel pretty, not to feel confident, not to feel proud of yourself for your accomplishments. Having religious parents is using the bible verse “obey your elders” against your younger sister to play what you wanted to play, and realizing how much you hurt her all those years because of some stupid bible verse taken out of context (just to clarify, our relationship is the strongest out of my family).

Having religious extremist parents is being lectured for hours that “you aren’t helping your mother out around the house enough” while neglecting our education.

Having religious extremist parents is spending hours in a church service where the preacher tells you how you can’t be like the rest of the world, that the rest of the world is wrong, that other theologies are wrong, and woe is the church for having so many young people leave christianity, and don’t ever be like them.

Having religious extremist parents is realizing years later that you gave money EVERY GODD*MN WEEK to some grown man that could’ve gotten a real job to pay his bills, because if you weren’t tithing, you weren’t “christian enough”.

Having religious extremist parents is having a father who thinks the world is awful, and a mother who is so disillusioned that she can only see the rosy world in her head.

Having religious extremist parents is watching your family fall apart when you grow up. Having religious extremist parents is watching the abuse between your parents, but knowing they’ll never divorce because “it’s not god’s will”, and “divorce is wrong”.

Having religious extremist parents is knowing that there are some things, some beliefs that they will never accept you for. Having religious extremist parents is finding yourself much later in life that you should’ve.

It’s growing up and realizing the isolation, the trauma, the depression, and the brokenness in your own family and wondering why you never realized it before.”

How about you?

Were you raised in an overly religious household? Maybe even bordering on extremism?

If so, please tell us about it in the comments.

The post People Who Grew up With Very Religious Parents Talk About Their Experiences appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Who Are as Clueless as They Are Hilarious

It’s pretty hard to shock people these days when it comes to dumb stuff people say and think. The internet has pretty much made everyone’s internal monologue available to the public, and for most of us, that’s not necessarily a good thing.

If you’re looking to feel smarter or more put together, though, I can’t think of a better way than scrolling these 10 posts.

10. Fool me once.

You know what, we all know the rest.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

9. The question we all need the answer too.

Those naughty grapes.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

8. You keep thinking it’s going to get better.

It goes the other way, though.

God bless the internet from facepalm

7. Imagine having the gall to call someone else stupid.

That confidence is something.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

6. Those dang Canadians.

Always studying history and stuff.

Welp from facepalm

5. I do like Roman numerals.

I wouldn’t call them yummy, though.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

4. Sometimes words escape us.

Sleep deprivation is real.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

3. I mean, he might.

I hope no one brings him a sick chicken, though.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

2. This is awkward.

I’m glad someone told them.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

1. I wonder how many minutes it took.

To infinity and beyond!

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

Whew. Those were some doozies, y’all. Some people need to do more reading. And thinking. And maybe just not post online. Ever.

Which one actually had you shaking your head? Which one had you sh**ting your pants? Which one filled you with such existential dread that you fear going to sleep tonight?

Tell us in the comments!

The post People Who Are as Clueless as They Are Hilarious appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Share Stories About Little Lies They Told That Snowballed Into a Big Mess

Tell me if you’ve had this happen to you before: you tell a lie, a little white lie, that fib catches on, and then, before you know it, the whole thing has spread like wildfire and taken on a life of its own.

And then the situation spirals out of control!

Yes, it happens from time to time, even to the best of us.

Are you ready to hear some interesting tales?

Let’s check out some stories from AskReddit users.

1. Hilarious.

“Young co-worker and his sister would play practical jokes on each other.

She put an exploding “cigarette load” in one of his cigarettes.

He discovered it, stopped by drugstore on way home and bought an eyepatch. Went to a bar to kill some time, called home and told mom cig exploded and he was at emergency.

Unknown to him, sis confesses to mom, mom slaps her upside head and much tears and sadness and anger all around.

Co worker goes home with eye patch on, unaware of turmoil.

Much sympathy and apologies and crying, even nearby relatives had come to house to berate sister.

Co-worker has to wear eye patch for six weeks, never ‘fessed up.”

2. Ouch…

“I can’t go to your party because I’m feeling sick tonight.

A few hour later, my friends are knocking at my door with chicken soup when all I wanted was a quiet evening to read and mast*rbate.”

3. Storytime.

“Okay so I was trying to get my lying calibration with a budding drug addiction in early adolescence and figuring out when to hold/when to fold. Like, when do you make sh*t up and when do you lie by omission, right?

So one night I come home and just book it past my parents because I am far too high to deal with them. I have cinnabar eyes and sniffles, its a bit much. Last time of “say nothing” erupted so I just made something up quick so I could go to my room without being bothered.

When asked “Why are your eyes so red?” I blurted out with 0 thought “SETH’S SISTER HAS CANCER!” and kept sniffling then shut the door.

Seth is an only child. This story had to evolve with his assistance every time I saw him. I made him participate.

Mom asked me about “Rebecca” regularly for like, a decade.

Im 13 years clean in October. Theres this whole thing about making amends unless to do so would injure them or others, and since mom would murder Seth for going along with it, I have said nothing. She hasn’t asked about it in maybe 5 years so I don’t feel as bad anymore.

I’m an awful person, but for what its worth, Rebecca is in remission now and has a beautiful family.”

4. You monster.

“I was a little devil. So my family from my mother’s side is Mexican. All of my cousins are blonde and/or very, very light-skinned including myself.

I went to stay there for a summer when I was around 6-7 and my cousins and I spent a full day at a nearby pool with a bunch of other kids. I was used to bringing sun screen in my back pack, but my cousins didn’t even think about it since no one else was using sunscreen.

As the day ended most of the other kids were okay, maybe just a little more tanned. My cousins had major sunburns and were crying. One of them asked how come I was fine. Instead of showing them my sunscreen and aloe vera lotion I told them I used the same thing we used for mosquito bites-lemon. Yes, they tried it.

It resulted in 6 kids full of blisters and no birthday party for me that year. After my first real sunburn I realize how much of a monster I am.”

5. Liar!

“I was 13 and I used to have a paper round and I couldn’t be bothered to deliver one evening.

So I decided to dump them and told the paper shop owner that I had my delivery bag stolen from me when I went to start my route.

They then asked me a few questions and then the police got involved and even went round in the police car to where it “happened” and if I knew who did it.”

6. That’s him!

“My academic department had a booth at a comic con for recruitment and research. A guy was cosplaying as George RR Martin (writer of Game of Thrones).

He looked a lot like George RR Martin, was wearing the signature black hat and carrying a copy of one of the books. We had him sit at our booth for photos as a joke.

People started to line up for his autograph. Then he started to sign books, then he started to give writing and life advice. It went on for far too long and I was dying the whole time since I technically was at work.

If George RR Martin signed your book at Tampa Bay Comic Con, I have bad news for you.”

7. Bad experience.

“I told a girl I had a gf after she messaged me saying she wanted to hookup, and she then threatened to kill herself and take me with her, along with threatening my “gf”.

I alerted my school, and they sent a social worker to talk to her. fast forward a few weeks I had to change classes, deactivated my Instagram, and almost filed a restraining order. At the time, I was a sophomore and she was a senior.

Worst experience of my life.”

8. Busted!

“Called out sick from work then a few hours later I got pulled over for speeding right across the street from the plaza where I work.

Needless to say all my coworkers saw it.”

9. You scored!

“Called in to work just wanting a day off after a month of blackout days.

Said I feeling sick and next thing I know I’m filling out a “Self Report” for Covid-19 with a full week off work, signing up for a Covid test the next day, and having to explain to people why I’m home when I’m usually not.

All in all it turned out nice because I really enjoyed that week off, but I wasn’t expecting all the extras that came with.”

10. Passing the lie down.

“I was driving somewhere with my friend’s fiancee. Up ahead I could see a dead skunk on the side of the road so I switched the AC from vent to recycle.

She looked at me confused and asked why I did that. I lied for the fun of it and said we were in kind of a marshy area with lots of bugs and I didn’t want them to get into the car through the vent.

Flash forward 10 years and I’m driving somewhere with my friend’s wife and she reaches over and switches the AC from vent to recycle. I ask her why and she explains there are a lot of bugs in the area and she doesn’t want them getting into the car. I’m about to educate her that that isn’t how it works and then suddenly I remember… oh… so I just leave it alone.

Flash forward 10 more years and I’m driving somewhere with my friend’s teenage daughter and she reaches over and switches the AC from vent to recycle… uh-oh.”

11. Jimothy.

“I worked at a rather large medical facility with a staff of several thousand, in a position that had contact with pretty much everybody in every department.

I had a coworker named Jim, and one night I was talking to some random nurse, and she referred to him as James. I asked who James was, and she said you know, Jim? He’s on your shift? I laughed and said, “His name isn’t James, it’s Jimothy.”

That spread like wildfire, that this poor bastard’s real name was Jimothy. This was probably 2003. I left that job in 2010. I’ve been assured by many people, including Jimothy himself, that the majority of the staff actually believe his name is Jimothy.

And this has been passed down to new employees in the oral tradition.”

12. It’s my birthday!

“I was backpacking Australia by myself for several months.

At some point I realized that telling people it’s my birthday is an instant ice breaker and great way to make quick friends/drinking buddies. It worked great in several cities and was fairly harmless… For a while.

I took an overnight bus to a new city and my hostel was supposed to pick me up at the bus station, but they weren’t there when I arrived. I called them to confirm they were on the way. When they finally showed up, apologizing profusely, I said something like, “no worries. I’m just exhausted from the bus journey and it’s my birthday tomorrow”

Well… They upgraded my stay (from a bunk bed to a queen bed), gave me a free dinner and paid for my club crawl pass for that evening. I immediately felt guilty but was way past the point of no return.

I made fast friends with other people at the hostel and we all piled into a bus for the club crawl. After a bit, people started pulling out their passports to compare horrible passport photos.

I knew that the birthdate listed on my passport was not the current date we were celebrating my “birthday” so I decided to be proactive and head it off at the pass.

I told them that my father worked for the government but I didn’t know specifically what his job was. And a few years back, my entire family had to move and change all our details on our passports. Our last name spelling was changed, birthdate, etc. Everybody believed me, and they were gutted that we couldn’t announce to the bouncers that it was my birthday.

We walked in to the club and I came face to face with a group of guys I’d met at a different city a week ago… Who I’d also told it was my birthday, a week ago. I just breezed past that detail by saying it’s my birth week.

Anyway, it was a fun night out, nobody suspected me for a filthy liar and it was probably my favorite spot in Australia.”

13. Trilingual.

“Something funny rather than negative happened a while back.

I lied by adding I speak a third language fluently, that’s ‘Tamil’ on my CV (my country’s two main languages are Sinhala and Tamil). My work colleagues thought I was cool for being trilingual and made me teach them to swear in both languages. The third language had poorly pronounced words but I was enjoying the attention.

Eventually, there was a big chance to secure a deal with a client who spoke Tamil. My boss specifically brought me to the trip and introduced us and jokingly said ‘now talk in Tamil!’.

I thought I was f*cked and decided to speak in my second native language (Sinhala), thinking confidence can sell, right? The bugger spoke back to me in Sinhala! I explained the lie to him. Luckily it went well and we both laughed it off in front of my boss.

My workplace still thinks I’m trilingual.”

Has something like this ever happened to you?

Well, don’t keep the story to yourself! Tell us about it in the comments.

Please and thank you!

The post People Share Stories About Little Lies They Told That Snowballed Into a Big Mess appeared first on UberFacts.

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If You Only Had 30 Minutes to Hide From a Nuclear Blast, Where Would You Go? Here’s What People Said.

This sure isn’t the most pleasant question you’ve ever been asked, but we still want to know what people would say, right?

And, hopefully (fingers crossed), we’ll never have to actually worry about this, but we’re gonna dive in!

If you had 30 minutes to hide from a nuclear blast, where would you go?

Here’s what AskReddit users had to say.

1. Hopefully that wouldn’t happen.

“The Eisenhower tunnel on I-70 in Colorado (1.7 miles long).

Unless it turns into Stephen King’s “The Stand”…”

2. It might work?

“I’d always heard a basement of a library is good because books may absorb some radiation.”

3. You don’t have to go anywhere!

“I work at a nuclear pharmacy which has dosimeters, geiger counters, potassium iodide tablets, Radiac spray, PPE and lead, and the break room/office is an extra vault that was made to house a particle accelerator (known as a cyclotron).

I’m at work right now. So, assuming I’m safe from the initial blast radius, I’d probably go sit at my desk, scroll through Reddit and watch the world end.”

4. Out in the country.

“The nearest city is over 30 miles away, and it’s all open country from where I am and for at least another 10 miles to the mountains in the other direction.

Either I’d jump in the truck and try to make it to the mountains thru the reservation or crawl under the house and hope for the best.”

5. Secret spot.

“There is an old building near me that has a basement. I know what boards to move to get into the basement from the outside.

It’s the only building I know of within about 100 miles that is entirely reinforced brick masonry with a basement, and I’m sure I’d spend the apocalyptic event chatting with several homeless people who also know about the board.

We’d all survive though.”

6. That’s where I’ll be.

“There’s a building at the college I work at that goes 80 feet underground and has 6 foot thick inward sloping concrete walls

I’ll be in there.”

7. All over the place.

“Pretty easy, I would just go to my nearest bomb shelter. They are all over the place here in Finland and can house up to 4 million people (so more than enough room for the entire urban population) .

Every metro station also doubles as a bomb shelter, and I can walk to one of those within 10 minutes so I would probably chill there (there are probably a bunch of shelters even closer to me though but could be busy).

You can actually walk across a lot of Helsinki centre completely underground (I often do when it is raining), the underground network of tunnels is huge. And all bomb proof.

Finland actually has one of the most thorough civil defense programs in the world.”

8. Fallout shelter.

“There’s a fallout shelter in a bank about a mile down from where I live that was built back in the 1960s.

I’d probably yank some snacks and a bottle of Jack from the kitchen and sprint down there, then hunker down for a few days.

If it’s locked, then… well… I can polish off the Jack and wait for the fireworks.”

9. Sounds like you’ll be fine.

“If I knew it was coming, I’d just drive away. Distance makes all the difference with nuclear blasts.

I’m close to mountains in the outer suburbs of a big city, I’d drive in that mountain direction as we often have winds from there. Minimal fallout that way too.

If leaving the city was not an option, I’d just hit up my basement. It’s below ground enough that I think I’d be fairly safe.”

10. Now I’m sad.

“I’d gather my dogs and cats and go up to our bedroom and cuddle my husband.

Give the doggies and kitties some treats on the bed and hope they don’t jump off so that my last moments are a cuddle fest.”

11. Wait for it.

“I’d grab a six pack, grab a chair and sit outside calling my family and friends while waiting for the end.

I’m not suicidal but any world that would exist after my city gets bombed would be unrecognizable and probably not worth surviving for.”

12. Pedal to the metal.

“I’d drive like crazy for 30 minutes.

If I drive at 100km/hour, I would be 50km from the center of the explosion. A good distance.’

13. It’s under control.

“Switzerland.

They have the 110% capacity of their population in bunkers so there’s room for me.”

14. To the library!

“There is an old library built in the 1960’s less than a mile from my house with a basement fallout shelter.

I know because I always see the old 1960’s fallout shelter signs and consider stealing one but the potential of getting caught and being banned from the library for the rest of my life stops me every time.”

Now it’s your turn!

In the comments, tell us about when you told a lie that spiraled out of control.

Please and thank you!

The post If You Only Had 30 Minutes to Hide From a Nuclear Blast, Where Would You Go? Here’s What People Said. appeared first on UberFacts.

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These 13 Should Have Thought Before They Posted

BUT, most of these posts are so utterly awful there’s no way the brains that came up with them could have possibly thought better of posting them.

We’ve all seen these things pop up on our timeline. We shake our heads and move on, but man – sometimes when you pile them all together like this, it’s really almost too much to take.

Let’s get to it!

13. I thought about this way too hard.

And it’s still not right.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

12. Maths are hard.

But I mean. Not that hard.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

11. Logic is a thing.

You should try it sometimes.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

10. It’s like a Laurel and Hardy sketch.

Yes, I’m old.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

9. It’s embarrassing for someone.

But not “Steve.”

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

8. It’s all about the look, for some people.

Some dead people.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

7. Those scientists lol.

They’re the ones laughing.

Scrolling through Facebook and I couldn’t believe what I saw. from stupidpeoplefacebook

6. Bless Teresa.

She’s doing the good work.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

5. Those maths, man.

They get so many of us.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

4. Not salmon vanilla, no.

But that looks suspicious, for sure.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

3. A billion air. Y’all.

I have no words.

Ouch. from stupidpeoplefacebook

2. A delivering library might not be a bad idea.

In case we’re never leaving our house again.

It’s a new concept from facepalm

1. Where to start?

I guess we’ll just leave it there.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

I’m not okay after reading through that. I think I just got dumber. Again.

So that’s two more dumbs for me! How about you?

Let us know how much dumber you are now that you’ve read this?

In the comment! Fart!

The post These 13 Should Have Thought Before They Posted appeared first on UberFacts.