If You’re Addicted to Shopping Online, These Memes Are for You

I have a confession I need to get off my chest: I’ve developed a little bit of a problem with online shopping since this whole lockdown started.

It’s not like I’m buying anything expensive or crazy, but still, I find myself constantly hitting BUY on records, used books, and some other stuff I like to collect.

And I don’t think I’m alone in this fetish right now, am I?

Here are some funny memes about being maybe just a wee bit addicted to online shopping.

Let’s take a look.

1. They’re going above and beyond.

What would we do without Amazon right now?

Photo Credit: someecards

2. It makes every day an adventure!

What the hell just showed up at my door?

Photo Credit: someecards

3. And now, we wait…

Admit it, you’ve been doing this.

Photo Credit: someecards

4. In the comfort of your own home.

Isn’t that nice and relaxing?

Photo Credit: someecards

5. Rolling the dice…

At least you can ship them back for free.

Photo Credit: someecards

6. He can’t know about these things.

It’s best to keep him in the dark.

Photo Credit: someecards

7. Sure…something like that.

This is gonna be a good one!

Photo Credit: someecards

8. A rule to live by.

Let’s see if we can do this on the cheap.

Photo Credit: someecards

9. A never-ending barrage of ads.

Okay, enough with the toilet seats!

Photo Credit: someecards

10. This isn’t good.

How did I mess up this bad?!?!

Photo Credit: someecards

11. Livin’ the glamorous life.

At least in theory…

Photo Credit: someecards

12. I don’t know if I can make it.

My card is ALL THE WAY OVER THERE.

Photo Credit: someecards

13. Pretty much the only thing keeping me going right now.

Let’s just be honest about it.

Photo Credit: someecards

Are you feeling these memes, or what?

I think I know the answer to that question…

Okay, now we want to hear from you in the comments.

Tell us what (and how much) you’ve been buying online during this lockdown.

Let’s compare notes!

The post If You’re Addicted to Shopping Online, These Memes Are for You appeared first on UberFacts.

People Who Work Unusual Jobs Talk About How Folks React When They Tell Them About It

Not every job is 9 to 5.

A lot of folks out there work jobs that some people don’t even know exist.

It’s always interesting to learn about the different vocations that people have and you’re about to hear about a bunch that you might not be familiar with.

Let’s dive into the responses from AskReddit users who opened up about how folks react to their unusual occupations.

1. Wow!

“I had a brief stint as a “junior cheese evaluator.”

People loved hearing about the cheese tasting part, but what is less known is the business analytics side of things — we have to know what good cheese is and what consumer tastes are like and how to influence those tastes to make room for company products that maximize profits for the cheesemaker and retailer.

There’s a whole national certification exam I was studying for before I decided to take a drastic career shift because the whole cheese thing wasn’t paying the bills and it was too much work holding down three jobs.”

2. That’s pretty cool.

“I produce subtitles, for TV and now for online learning at a university. It’s been amazing how many people have thought that either A, a computer does it or B, I’m a sign language interpreter.

I was also a teleprompter / Autocue operator for a while, when I first left uni, and it was one of the best jobs I’ve had. Though again, people thought a computer did it. And I’ve had likes of actors literally laugh in my face because they consider it beneath the lowest of the low apparently (until it breaks…)”

3. That’s interesting.

“Train Controller.

People ask me if I drive trains. I am in the habit now of just pre-empting people and saying “It is like air traffic control but for the rail network”.

In the U.S.A. I believe it is called Train Dispatch. People are generally sort of impressed and want to ask questions about the railway.”

4. Get out the mannequins!

“I work on a truck doing simulated emergencies with high fidelity mannequins . The mannequins have pulses they breathe, you can listen to lung sounds, and their eyes move back-and-forth.

We take the truck to fire departments and critical access hospital‘s in our state to provide emergency training at no cost to the fire departments and hospitals. There are only five states that I know of in the nation that do this training.”

5. Still around?

“Chimney sweep

Usual reaction: that’s still a thing?”

6. Could you do this?

“A friend of mine is a harbor pilot.

Brings huge ships in and out of harbors. Makes mid 6 figures. A lot of boredom with high stress in the middle.”

7. If you’ve got the guts…

“Once upon a time I worked at a boarstud. I got hired in the lab preserving semen for sale. Dull, morning headachy work staring at semen under a microscope.

Buuut the shed often needed help collecting semen and a fun, well paying, easy job. Go get the pig, get him to mount, grab a penis and then nap as they ejaculate for ten to fifteen minutes. Repeat.

I got paid $27 an hour to sit on a stool and hold a curly penis three days a week. I now work 6-7 days, collect blood samples, monitor surgery, take phones, do inventory and handle angry clients with a smile for $16 as a vet tech. Hmm.

If you’ve got the guts, consider pig wanker.”

8. Never heard of this.

“I was an enucleator.

When people passed and wanted to donate their corneas I would retrieve their eyes from their body and take them to the lab to process for transplant. When people found that out they were either completely grossed out or thought it was really interesting.”

9. Sounds…erotic.

“My boyfriend’s parents own their own erotica publishing house. They hire ghost writers to churn out the kind of smut you can get for $2 on kindle.

My boyfriend narrates the audiobooks.”

10. Make it look good.

“I was talking to a food stylist and there is one lady who does all of the sour cream commercials because she can make perfect dollops.

Apparently they call her “The Dollop Queen of Georgia”.”

11. Sounds like a big job.

“I’m a procurement officer for an airline, I order parts for planes.

No one seems to realise my job exists but everyone gets it when I tell them what I do.

Reaction is generally wow that’s so cool! In reality I raise purchase orders all day. But it’s pretty cool to wander out to the hangar when a plane is in.”

12. A lot of cash.

“I work for a pond and water garden company specializing in Japanese koi fish sales.

Nothing too crazy, but people always seem a little surprised when I tell them I sell imported koi fish for way too much money.”

13. This is a job.

“One of my best friends’ husbands job was to read Bill Gates’ mail with the intent to prevent crazy people from showing up at the Microsoft campus demanding to speak with him.”

14. Espionage.

“I was an industrial espionage specialist for a year. Basically companies would pay the company I worked for to gain intel on their competitors, their distribution chain, expansion plans, contracts etc.

My job was to gather intelligence, sometimes I would go undercover as a low level employee, sometimes I would go undercover as a headhunter & interview current employees, carefully using questions to elicit information, sometimes I would use a “discretionary fund” to “purchase” intel from employees, once I even went undercover as a reporter to interview a logistics manager.

Sometimes I would just spend hours reading information on the stock exchange, government planning departments etc.

It was a weird job, but I could usually piece together a good amount of info.”

Do you work an unusual job that most people don’t even know exists?

How do people react when you tell them about it?

Please share with us in the comments. We look forward to hearing from you!

The post People Who Work Unusual Jobs Talk About How Folks React When They Tell Them About It appeared first on UberFacts.

Movie Theaters Are Giving Us the Giggles With Their Hilarious Lockdown Signs

Would you go see a movie anytime soon? It seems so strange that just a couple of months ago, it wouldn’t be weird to go see a flick with a friend in a crowded theater and load up on snacks. But now…well…

In the meantime, though, movie theaters are using their marquee signs to help make folks laugh and I think they’re doing a pretty damn good job. Here are some good signs that we think will bring a smile to your face.

Enjoy.

1. With Kevin Costner?

Only dance with yourself right now?

View this post on Instagram

Favorite one yet #pandemichumor #parkwaytheater

A post shared by Katie Vagnino (@poetkatiev) on

2. Time to hunker down.

Do it at home with some good movies!

3. How all relationships are starting now.

Zoom it up, folks!

View this post on Instagram

New marquee Friday ?

A post shared by The Parkway Theater (@theparkwaympls) on

4. Feels like an eternity…

But it’ll be over at some point!

View this post on Instagram

The Parkway is still on-point with their marquee.

A post shared by Charles Robinson (@charlesrobinsonmn) on

5. Bring on the summer!

Let’s all get outside and play..at a safe distance.

6. Me, too…

But, it is what it is.

View this post on Instagram

Update marquee ✅ #stayhomemn

A post shared by The Parkway Theater (@theparkwaympls) on

7. No encounters at all.

At least, not for now.

8. Very hope, we hope!

We need movie theaters in our lives!

9. Giving out a good recommendation.

Hey, thanks a lot!

10. All the appropriate titles.

Going stir crazy…

11. Nothing going on at all.

I can’t wait until this ramps back up.

12. Amazing! Marty McFly!

And posted by Michael J. Fox himself!

View this post on Instagram

Thanks #bobgale and @kigginstheatre

A post shared by Michael J Fox (@realmikejfox) on

Funny stuff, right?

Have you seen any good signs from businesses during the shutdown? If so, please tell us about them and share a photo in the comments if you have them.

Please and thank you!

The post Movie Theaters Are Giving Us the Giggles With Their Hilarious Lockdown Signs appeared first on UberFacts.

Funny Memes We Think Will Put You in a Good Mood

Many of us could use a little mental boost right now, correct? A little something to shake the cobwebs out of our heads and to make us LAUGH.

Because, as all of us know, laughing is very important and it helps us relieve our stress. And there’s a lot of stress going on these days…

Here are 14 funny memes that we think will do you some good. Enjoy!

1. Run for it!

I did this CONSTANTLY.

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

2. A pain like no other.

Part of the fun of summer!

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

3. I feel this one deep in my soul.

Scalding hot shower for hours.

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

4. I don’t like getting stuck on that side.

Because this is what happens…

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

5. Perfectly sums it all up.

This is life.

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

6. Dear God, why did I do that?

You’ll never recover from the embarrassment.

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

7. Oh, no, you don’t!

That’s enough happiness for now.

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

8. Definitely getting mixed signals.

Which way should you go?

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

9. Hahahaha. So good.

Don’t mess with Sam Jackson, even if he has Alzheimer’s.

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

10. An ancient ritual.

The holding of the hair while your friend pukes.

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

11. I hope no one sees me…

Because this has to be done.

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

12. I did my part!

I just hope the boss noticed…

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

13. Ummm, sure…

My online shopping problem is out of control right now.

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

14. Can’t wait to do this again.

Hang in there, everyone!

Photo Credit: pleated-jeans

Okay, that did the trick! Now I feel a lot better since I got some big laughs out of the way!

How about you? Have you seen anything really funny lately that you’d like to show us? In the comments, please share an amusing tweet, joke, meme, photo, story, etc.

Thanks!

The post Funny Memes We Think Will Put You in a Good Mood appeared first on UberFacts.

People Who Definitely Won the Food Lottery

Have you ever won the “food lottery”? Do you have absolutely any idea what I’m talking about right now?

I’m talking about when you get a really unusual or downright weird food item by accident. I know it’s happened to me before with a variety of products, including carrots, potatoes, and the occasional crazy-looking sunflower seed.

Let’s take a look at some folks who definitely won the food lottery.

1. Where did that come from?

Never seen that before…

Found a Wizard in my Gummy Bear pack from mildlyinteresting

2. No pit? No problem!

That’s gotta be one in a million.

Jackpot! from pics

3. The carrot hand of death.

This could be the plot of a horror movie.

This incredible carrot hand was found while digging juice carrots at our farm today from mildlyinteresting

4. This is INSANE.

Look at the size of that thing!

I for one welcome our mutant carrot overlords from AbsoluteUnits

5. That is their offspring.

Ever seen something like this in your days?

Todays clementine had an almost perfect mini clementine inside… from mildlyinteresting

6. A perfect little pearl.

Glad you didn’t swallow it.

This pearl I found in an oyster I was eating. from mildlyinteresting

7. I hope you saved this.

Or maybe you just ate it all at once?

These gummybears came stuck together in the bag. from mildlyinteresting

8. Three times the flavor!

Mutant bananas are taking over the planet. Beware!

I had a quadruple mini banana this morning from mildlyinteresting

9. Absolute perfection.

Almost too pretty to eat…almost…

The way my cheese melted on my burger. from oddlysatisfying

10. Be careful with that thing.

You might put someone’s eye out.

I got a squash and I’m not afraid to use it. from teenagers

11. You won’t get that smell out of your house for DAYS.

Or maybe even WEEKS.

This giant clove of garlic from mildlyinteresting

12. They look pretty proud of this baby.

That is outrageous.

Absolute Unit of a Collard Green from AbsoluteUnits

13. You can eat off that thing for a while.

You should call the Guinness Book of World Records.

Daughter found the largest blackberry I’ve ever seen from mildlyinteresting

Wow! Those are pretty wild!

Okay, now we want to hear from all of you out in Internet Land. Tell us some stories and show us some photos about when you won the food lottery.

Let’s see what you got!

The post People Who Definitely Won the Food Lottery appeared first on UberFacts.

Funny Tweets About the “Murder Hornets”

Is it possible for 2020 to get worse? Millions of people are out of work, we’re not allowed to leave our houses, the news is filled with terrible stories every single night…

Oh, wait, here’s something else you can worry about now! MURDER HORNETS HAVE NOW ENTERED THE UNITED STATES.

Yes, you read that correctly. The deadly Asian hornet is here and they threaten to wipe out the honeybee population (and they kill up to 50 people a year in Japan). Man…I think we could all use a break from shitty world events for a while…but I guess we’ll have to keep waiting.

At least we can have some laughs, right?!?!

Here are some funny tweets about those damn murder hornets…hopefully, they’re not here to stay…

1. Thanks for the tip.

Hey, it might save your life one day…

2. Let’s really mess with everyone.

Can we please get a break? Please?

3. Sounds like it’ll be very soon.

Keep your fingers crossed.

4. They haven’t been charged with a crime…yet.

Lawyers are always doing this, aren’t they?

5. What’s next?

Can we really top this?

6. You need to chill, 2020.

For realz…it’s not cool anymore.

7. God is really…playing God right now.

Which I guess is in his job description.

8. It’s everywhere right now.

But hopefully, it won’t invade your area…

9. What else can we add to the list?

Giant robots with laser beams on their heads?

10. They’re very fine people, actually.

I’ve known them all my life.

11. I’ll show you how.

Is this all part of a big HOAX?

12. Can’t wait to tell the grandkids about it!

Back in my day…

13. What an elitist.

Always have to be a one-upper, don’t you?

What else could possibly go wrong this year?

Talk to us in the comments and brainstorm about how things can get even worse! This will be a fun experiment in despair and terror!

Good luck out there!

The post Funny Tweets About the “Murder Hornets” appeared first on UberFacts.

Design Fails by People Who Had Exactly One Job

You only had one job!

How many times have you heard that yelled in your face before?

Or maybe in someone else’s face who you worked with?

The point is, a lot of people make big mistakes in the design field and some of them are just so good that they must be shared with the world.

Like these!

They’re really bad, but we think you’ll get a big laugh out of them! So enjoy!

1. Do you think they thought this one through?

I’m not so sure about that…

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

2. Soup for Sluts!

It sounds delicious!

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

3. Do these two billboards belong side-by-side?

Sending some mixed signals…

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

4. Take a closer look at the dress.

Come on, people…

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

5. SLIMING herb.

Sounds kind of…slimy…

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

6. Poor Granny…she never saw this coming.

I, for one, am quite offended by this.

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

7. Grandma really can’t catch a break.

They had to do it…

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

8. Kit Ka…

I would think you’d at least want the WHOLE name of your product on there, but what do I know?

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

9. Load up on lighter fluid kids!

Seems like a REALLY bad idea.

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

10. Just looks really disturbing.

Something to nibble on…

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

11. A watch! For the kids!

Just ignore the shape, I guess…

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

12. Perfect placement.

Do you think this is a big seller?

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

13. Yikes…let’s end on that note.

Not a good look…not good at all…

Photo Credit: Cheezburger

I hope these folks still have jobs…because those are some major FAILS!

Now we want to hear from all the readers out there.

Have you seen any really bad design fails lately?

If so, please share them with us in the comments. We’d love to see them!

The post Design Fails by People Who Had Exactly One Job appeared first on UberFacts.

Check Out One Tenant’s Sweet Revenge on His Lowlife Landlord

I know that landlords get a bad rap, and some of them are very nice and even work with their tenants through hard times – but others are the reason for the stereotype, and when they get what’s coming to them, we all like to watch.

Which is why people are loving this story about one person who got back at this landlord who went out of his way to be a jerk.

The bad blood began when the landlord either stopped paying the heating bill, or turned down the heat remotely, in the middle of a chilly winter. Being smart cookies, they consulted an attorney and learned they could withhold their rent and, if it wasn’t fixed, take the landlord to court.

Instead of doing the right thing, the landlord tried to evict them for non-payment but a judge finds in their favor.

Image Credit: Reddit

Fast forward to the signing of a new lease, and the tenants wrote in a clause allowing them to break the least with 45-days notice because they were looking for a home of their own. When they’re ready they give the notice, pay their final rent, and moved out – but the landlord refused to give back their security deposit.

The tenant sued for the deposit (plus fees), and the landlord countersued for the 6 months missing rent (plus fees).

Image Credit: Reddit

The group is ordered to arbitration before wasting a judges time, but the arbitrator recommends the tenants pay up. That is, until they realized that the landlord was using a forged version of the lease.

Image Credit: Reddit

The judge found in their favor, but of course, that’s not quite the end.

Image Credit: Reddit

It took awhile but they did get their money – and the landlord got shamed.

Image Credit: Reddit

Is that a happy ending or what?

I mean, I know court is expensive and time-consuming, but I guess alls well that ends well!

The post Check Out One Tenant’s Sweet Revenge on His Lowlife Landlord appeared first on UberFacts.

Netflix Codes That Allow You to Watch All the Romance Movies Your Heart Can Handle

Even if people don’t like to admit it, everyone loves a good romantic film once in a while.

And I am one of those people. The older I get, the more I find myself stopping on the Hallmark Channel when I’m looking for something to watch.

But I digress.

We’re here to load you up with codes on Netflix so you can enjoy all different kinds of romantic movies.

To access each of these individual categories, sign into Netflix and replace the “xxx” in this web address (www.netflix.com/browse/genre/xxx) with the corresponding code number below OR just click directly on the links we provided.

And away you go! Enjoy these flicks and be sure to have a bottle of wine and a box of tissues handy.

1. Romantic Favorites (502675)

Photo Credit: TriStar Pictures

Prepare to get all mushy and overcome with emotion when you use this code to tap into this category.

Enjoy such flicks as Silver Linings Playbook, She’s Out of My League, and As Good As It Gets.

2. Quirky Romance (36103)

Photo Credit: Netflix

Let’s get quirky! In a romantic way, I mean.

Use this code to watch such romantic flicks as Candy Jar, Mr. Right, and Can’t Help Falling in Love.

3. Romantic Independent Movies (9916)

Photo Credit: The Weinstein Company

There are a lot of good indie romance movies out there.

This category allows you to watch the very depressing Blue Valentine, the black-and-white smash hit from 2011 The Artist, and many others.

4. Romantic Dramas (1255)

Photo Credit: Paramount Pictures

What’s a little romance without some drama wrapped up in it?

Get romantic AND dramatic when you use this Netflix code and you can watch such films as The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, The Theory of Everything, and My Week With Marilyn.

5. Classic Romantic Movies (31273)

Photo Credit: Columbia Pictures

Yes, Groundhog Day came out 27 YEARS AGO, so it is now considered a “classic” film.

And it should be! Bill Murray has never been better!

Use this code on Netflix and you can watch this gem and others like Tootsie and Howard’s End.

6. Romantic Comedies (5475)

Photo Credit: Paramount Pictures

And, of course, we have the mother of all romantic films, the ROM-COM.

You know you can’t resist them, and at some point in your life, you’ll just give in and start enjoying them…I know I have.

Use this code to watch such romantic comedies as Failure To Launch, He’s Just Not That Into You, and Jerry Maguire.

Are you ready to fall in love, or what?

I know I am!

But before you do, please help us out with a favor.

If you know of any other good romantic films we should check out, please share them with us in the comments.

The post Netflix Codes That Allow You to Watch All the Romance Movies Your Heart Can Handle appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share Questions You Should Ask Someone When You’re on a First Date

When it comes to first dates, many people could use as much help as possible with breaking the ice.

It’s hard to get to know someone and it can be difficult to know the right questions to ask to keep the conversation (and hopefully the romance) moving along.

Do you want some advice about things to ask on first dates?

Let’s dive into these answers from AskReddit users.

1.  This will tell you a lot about a person.

“What do you do with your shopping cart when finished at the grocery store?”

2. Movie first, THEN dinner.

“I read a LPT earlier today that stated if you’re taking someone on a dinner/movie date, go to the movie first.

That way, at dinner, if the conversation is lacking or having a hard time starting up – you can get it going with talking about the movie. ?

3. Get this out of the way.

“Vaccinations… safe or harmful?

Earth… round or are you a dumb ass?”

4. Give me the details.

“What kind of music do you listen to?

Might seem basic but this is a great question to ask to get to know someone.

I have noticed however that most people just answer with “anything but country” so you could probably get a more passionate response by asking something along the lines of “What artist(s) are you currently listening to?””

5. For the bookworms.

“If your life were a book what would the title be?”

6. The trifecta.

“Do you like The Office?

Do you like dogs?

Do you have a real personality?”

7. Looking forward.

“What is something you’re looking forward to?

Always gets a good answer, and it’s usually something unexpected.”

8. You’ll get some good insight.

“What would you do if the zombie apocalypse started right now?”

9. What kind of weirdo does this?

“Do you sleep with your socks on?”

10. Just get it out of the way.

“I asked my husband (we’ve been together 27 years), “You aren’t an ax murderer are you?” on our first date.”

11. This is a good one.

“What’s getting you through the week?

You find out what makes them happy and what’s important to them.”

12. Get to the real stuff.

“My favorite was always “what are you passionate about?”

So much better than “what do you do?””

13. I like this.

“When was the last time you felt proud of yourself?”

14. You better be a big reader.

“What are your favorite books?

If you get the impression they don’t read books, run.”

15. Might be interesting…

“What is your mother’s maiden name?

What is your high school mascot?

What is the name of your childhood best friend?”

16. Try these out.

“OK Cupid had a really cool blog about statistics from their huge user base. The three questions they found were best predictors for compatibility:

Do you like scary movies?

Have you ever traveled alone in another country?

Wouldn’t it be fun to chuck it all and live on a sailboat?

If you agree on those 3, you’re likeliest to succeed.”

17. Straight to the important stuff.

“Are you Introvert or Extrovert?

And how do you rank your mental health level from 1 to 10?”

18. This is usually fun.

“I always like to ask about the worst date they ever had.”

19. Are you an animal lover?

“Do you have any pets?

1 of 3 things will happen:

1: Yes they do, and will talk / show photos of them for ages.

2: they don’t, but then you follow it up with what pets do you want and they will talk for ages.

3: they say no, I’m not really an animal person, in which case you leave them because you don’t need someone like that in your life.”

20. Give up the info.

“What’s your favorite dinner?

What’s in your bucket list?

Are you a dog person or a cat person?”

21. A smart idea.

“How was your latest night out?

IMHO a person who brags about how shitfaced or wasted they become doesn’t make a good impression as a responsible partner.”

22. Okay, that’s just weird.

“Are your fingerprints in the police database?”

“In millimeters, How long are your toenails before you decide to cut them? Do you keep the remains?”

“Do you have any pets you aren’t using anymore?”

“How do you feel about basements?”

“Which bodily fluid do you think has the most pleasant aroma?”

“Which layer of skin do you favor the most?”

“My cat died six years ago…. wanna see?”

Well, what do you think?

Are you going to incorporate any of these into your first-date question arsenal?

Let us know what you think in the comments!

And if you have any suggestions, please pass them along to us!

The post People Share Questions You Should Ask Someone When You’re on a First Date appeared first on UberFacts.