sexuality – fakuto

July 26, 2021

Are One Night Stands Awful? Let’s See What People Had To Say.

There’s a cliche in so many movies and TV shows. You’ve got a character to introduce (usually a guy) and you need to show that he’s kind of living wildly, so you have him wake up naked next to some attractive young woman whose name, we find out, he can’t remember.

But how much is this really happening? And how much does anyone really like it?

One user took to r/UnpopularOpinion to parse things out.

Casual sex and one night stands are overrated and unfulfilling

It seems media has made sleeping around casually and hooking up look like a liberating experience. You meet someone, you may or may not know their name, then you have sex with them. You do this every week or so, never getting to know the person except physically. I’m not one of those you should play hard to get or make em wait people but I think you should at least feel a deep affection first. We all know that sex feels great. But having an intimate conversation with someone, being vulnerable with a person you trust, & expressing your passions can bring a much more fulfilling experience. A lot of times we feel ashamed and regret sleeping with the person soon after. Yet, giving yourself completely to someone you have a deep reverence and compassion for does the exact opposite usually. We all have the power of choice and with that comes great responsibility. Let’s be a bit more thoughtful of who we decide to give ourselves to. Stop trying to fill that void and find more meaningful outlets and ways to connect.

And how did the people of Reddit respond? Let’s dive into the discourse.

1. “After a while it gets really old.”

Yep, after awhile it gets really old and you just want to have a real connection with someone. I distinctly remember the moment where I realized enough was enough and that I wanted a girlfriend after a couple years of casual relationships.

The worst part, and what probably pushed me over the edge, was when they wanted to get brunch the morning after. It was always so awkward and deflating, and made it obvious that this was no way to live life.

– StevieWonderTwin

2. “The feeling is beyond words”

So very true. I’ve had commitment issues my whole adult life but particularly in college. Ended up passing on some amazing women because of my emotional unavailability. I’ve worked through this now and tried to fix my relationship with my mother where I think caused most problems. I remember thinking I was the coolest at the time but the more it went on the emptier I felt.

I’m now with an amazing girl who truly completes me. I do not deserve her by any means but everyday I wake up just a bit before her and I watch her wake up and think how crazy lucky I am to have a life partner like her. The feeling is beyond words and I wish I met her years and years ago. She doesn’t know it yet but there’s not a doubt in my mind that she is my wife. I’m proposing in August.

Keep the faith guys!

– JoltyJob

3. “The hopeless romantic type”

My first relationship (started at 15) lasted 9 years so I ended up being kinda late to the casual thing.

I didn’t think I would like it much, I’m more of the hopeless romantic type. I’ve had a few over the years now and I mean… it’s not terrible, but it’s certainly missing some of the depth of a well known partner.

You basically exchange knowing your partner and being into them emotionally for the thrill of someone new. The thrill is pretty good, don’t get me wrong, but I’ll always take the long term partner over it.

That said if you find the right person, FWB situations can be pretty good. It’s kind of like a mix of both. You don’t love them, but you like them, and you get to know them in bed too. If you aren’t after a relationship it’s better than random hook-ups imo. Long term > FWB > randoms.

– thesircuddles

4. “Still crazy about him”

A friend had tried to hook up with me for years, but i turned him down. I wasn’t into casual.

I finally decided I wanted something easy with no strings.

We’ve been married for 20 years and our oldest is graduating this year. I’m still crazy about him and the s** is incredible.

– Own-Classroom-1660

5. “So awkward.”

They’re so awkward too the next day.

When I’ve had one night stands, I’d be drunk that night and so waking up sober in some stranger’s bed is h**la awk and uncomfy

– SurferBoi_

6. “Never gonna happen”

I could confidently say I’ll never have one night stand.

How the h**l are you not gonna put a night stand on both sides of your bed? Gotta go with two.

About the s**? Yeah that’s never gonna happen either lmao.

– GamerZ44

7. “I could never do that”

S** is definitely better when you personally know that person.

You’re showing vulnerability mentally, emotionally, and obviously physically.

I could never do that with some random stranger.

– viintageteen

8. “Let people do as they please”

given that this sub only upvotes Highly popular opinions … and that reddit is full of sad, self deprecating, and lonely people (tho not exclusively) and of course people who like making others feel bad for their choices… this makes sense it reached the front page.

let people do as they please. if sleeping around is what they like them let them live. if not being monogamous makes them happy. let them be. and if they don’t want to be vulnerable then there’s nothing wrong with that.. respect other people’s decisions.

– ThisGuyRightHer3

9. “Completely different versions of the same thing”

lots of weird comments here.

Like a family cooked dinner with all my loved ones is more fulfilling than stuffing my face with fried chicken.

I still love fried chicken though.

It’s two completely different versions of the same thing.

– Expensive_Cattle

10. “The lifetime average”

This is a topic the mainstream media pushes too in addition to division, strife, and whatever else.

How the f**k is everyone f**king weekly if the goddamn lifetime average is 7?

– KILLJEFFREY

11. “Not fulfilling”

I had a FWB before marriage… It was not fulfilling for me personally.

I understand some may enjoy it, but you have to have the personality to not need personal connection to enjoy s**.

I’ve come to describe casual s** like eating a chocolate bar when you’re hungry: sure, it takes the edge off your hunger, but if you could have something more (ful)filling (like a steak), you would prefer that instead of the candy.

– olympus321

12. “Different preferences”

Different people have different preferences.

If you personally prefer one or the other that’s fine but don’t act as if your preferences are superior and talk down to anyone who likes casual s**

– elementgermanium

13. “It depends on my mood”

Like everything in life, it depends on the situation.

Sometimes I’m just looking for s**…got an itch that needs scratching.

And sometimes I’m lonely and looking for an actual connect/relationship. It depends on my mood.

– katiek1114

14. “Stop giving your attention to media”

Maybe stop giving your attention to media that as you say promotes the antithesis of what you believe in.

Some people are into that s**t; many aren’t.

Perhaps consider avoiding the forms of media that make you think that’s a common belief.

– babyshaker_on_board

15. “The only thing I want”

It depends on individual desires.

I myself have zero romantic aspirations.

Because of this, physical pleasure is the only thing I have to gain from fornication, and the only thing I want from it.

– MilkPatty_

I guess at the end of the day the answer is…why not both?

But what do you think of all this?

Give us your thoughts in the comments.

The post Are One Night Stands Awful? Let’s See What People Had To Say. appeared first on UberFacts.

June 14, 2021

People Talk About the Worst Advice You Can Give to a Virgin

You’ll always remember your first time. Though not always fondly.

Maybe that’s because you got some bad advice? But surely not as bad as the advice found on this thread…

What is the WORST advice you can give a virgin for their first time? from AskReddit

The people of Reddit, as usual, did not disappoint.

It should be fairly obvious, but the rest of the page is going to be very weird and very NSFW.

1. Poking holes

Poking holes in condom will give you some breathing room.

– Harsh_Asnani

2. Fast and the Furious

Two key words gentlemen: Fast, and Hard.

Ladies love pure speed, so as soon as those panties come off you want to get in there as quickly as possible. Once you’re in you need to keep going, maintain that energy until you’re finished. Y’all know what a jackhammer is right? That’s basically the only way to make them feel good.

Girls say that they can c*m but they really cant, its all imaginary so don’t worry about it.

If she’s upset afterwards then that means you aren’t fast enough.

Work up those core muscles.

Also! Condoms are a scam. They advertise like they help avoid pregnancies but really it just makes those lil guys swim faster. So make sure not to use them. Ever

– Cl0udSurfer

3. That bites

Make sure to bite the b*lls

– _humanpieceoftoast

4. Twist it!

Bop It is a sex education toy

– whatchagonnado0707

5. That’s the button

Women love it when you vigorously finger their belly button.

– iPeeLavaLampGoo

6. Screamingly good

Scream I’m sorry the whole time

– Weddituser22

7. Like the real thing!

Sex looks and sounds exactly like p*rn so try to do it the same way

– the_monkey_of_lies

8. Going in

Start with some light fingering, one or two fingers.

Once she’s wet enough start slipping in more until your whole hand is in then slowly inch your way up to the elbow. You should feel a bit of a tug or pull on your arm by now and that means it’s safe to start the other hand in.

Once you get to biceps take a deep breath and ease your head in. The pull should feel pretty strong by now. Torso usually goes pretty smooth but you’ve gotta be gentle getting the hips in. Then the legs will go easily. Once you’re inside you can start to stretch out and now you’ve got a skinsuit

– Suspiciously_high

9. Learn from my mistakes

When getting a bj, tell her just right before you c*m that you’re about to c*m.

So she takes it out of her mouth but doesn’t have time to get out of the way and gets it all over her face and In the hair.

Absolutely didn’t happen to me at any point of my life, I promise.

– Mueller96

10. The summoning spell

The hole only appears if you sing the entire lyrics to ‘The Ketchup song’ three times beforehand.

That’s what the term ‘foreplay’ is.

– ArmedChimpanzee

11. All the way

Your b*lls go in the condom

– K666busa

12. The flop

Remember that it’s absolutely not about being gentle and caring.

Just flop around on top of them like you’re a cod that’s been dragged out of the depths of the oceans.

– Daviemoo

13. Stay still

Girls you don’t need to move or do any of the work.

Just lay there and think of the flowers.

– [user deleted]

14. Ahhh!

Sex is an emotional experience.

If you’re not sobbing uncontrollably and/or laughing hysterically throughout the entire process, you’re doing it wrong.

– BigBrownBeaver44

15. A real one

Story time!

Disclaimer circa 1995, internet p*rn is not ubiquitous yet, 16/17 years old.

My best friend and I in high school were in relationships with a pair of best friends. We go over his girls house, the 4 of us, and are hanging out. They decide to go to her room for “sexy-time”. A few minutes later I hear my friend hysterically laughing… I’m like wtf… he busts out of the room in his boxers still laughing hysterically. His girl wanted to give him a “blow job”… apparently in her mind that meant something very different than what everyone on here knows it as… she was literally blowing up and down on it, like she was trying to blow out birthday candles. He gently tried to correct her and she vehemently stated that this was how it was done! Needless to say, he got no action and their relationship ended abruptly thereafter.

So, worst advice? Her sister told her a blowjob was like blowing out birthday candles…

– Wgmack

I think it’s safe to say no one should follow any of that advice ever under any circumstances.

What bad advice would you add?

Tell us in the comments.

The post People Talk About the Worst Advice You Can Give to a Virgin appeared first on UberFacts.

June 7, 2021

Here’s the Real Difference Between Dating Men and Women – From the People Who Know

If you look up early uses of the word “bisexual,” they’re not quite what you think. It’s mostly references to the reproductive methods of plants, which isn’t nearly as interesting to most of us as the modern connotation, and the questions many of us have about it. Questions like this:

Bisexual people who have dated both genders, what are some notable differences you’ve learned about dating both women and men? from AskReddit

So, what’s the deal? The bisexual folks of Reddit tell all. (Most posters went out of their way to clarify that these are their own subjective opinions based on personal experiences and shouldn’t be read as generalizations for everybody in the world.)

1. A difference in communication.

Both genders are bad at communicating, but in completely different ways.

Men are more likely to not tell you information that would be important to you simply because they don’t deem it important. They gave you the important information. If you can’t understand it, then you’re either trying to complicate the issue or you’re not listening to them.

Women are more likely to not tell you information important to them because they see it as obvious. If they have to tell you the issue, then you’re not paying attention to them and the issue at hand or you’re not as invested in the relationship as they are.

– Twilcario

2. Suckers for cuddles.

Bisexual lady here.

Men have a tendency to assume that you’re looking for a more ‘serious’ relationship than they are, even if you explicitly say otherwise. And are suckers for cuddles.

Women like kissing more.

– astudyinbowie

3. A sense for danger.

So, what I can say is that after having four boyfriends, my ability to identify and avoid dangerous men was vastly improved, and my ability to identify and avoid dangerous women was . . . apparently not particularly improved at all.

I was very attuned to red flags involving sexism and completely unprepared for the fact that a woman who majored in Women’s Studies could perfectly well destroy years or decades of my life with no sexism necessary at all.

– queerbychoice

4. All about that baggage.

One thing I noticed back when I was dating was that women have a lot more baggage when it comes to physical intimacy. Women go through alot, they have tons of pressures put on them, many have had negative sexual experiences. It’s, well, just more complicated.

The guys I dated were frankly much more direct and more simplistic about it. I’m not saying either of these descriptions apply to all women or men, but that was my experience. With guys it was like ‘hey, wanna make out?’ and just sort of that simple.

– haroldtitus425

5. Identity acceptance.

When dating a man, he is very ok with me being bisexual. When dating a woman, it constantly comes up that I’m “actually straight” or “just going to leave [her] for a guy.” It is really annoying to have someone try to completely invalidate your feelings for them because of your dating history.

Yes, I’ve dated more men…I didn’t realize until I had been dating for several years that dating women was a viable option.

– Mr_ImMyOwnGrandpa

6. How forward?

Bi woman here.

There’s a tendency between queer women to avoid being very forward. I’m my own personal experience it’s because I know what it’s like to be pursued relentlessly (typically by men) and don’t want to become that person myself. Other women want to avoid the “predatory lesbian” stereotype that’s been fed to us through media.

Men are more forward but I don’t think they can pick up on the way that I’m feeling as easily as women can. My last girlfriend could tell something was wrong even if I put up (what I thought was) a very good front.

Women tend to have softer skin and lips.

Men kiss deeply and aggressively.

I like both

– thechelator

7. Trust and biphobia.

Bi woman. The biggest one was trust/biphobia and the way the two interrelate.

While dating a woman, having close male friends has always been off the table. It seems to really threaten/make uncomfortable my girlfriend and tends to turn into a never-ending “But are you SURE you don’t have feelings for him? you’re REALLY not attracted to him?” So many lesbians genuinely hate bi women and think they’re always going to cheat or leave for a guy.

Conversely, men don’t give a d**n if I have close female friends while dating them, but are far more likely to fetishize the knowledge that I’ve had past female partners. Which is obviously really uncomfortable if done in any sort of excess.

– FinalTourist

8. Romance and monogamy.

i find men to be more romantic and more interested in monogamy. women are easier to talk to and easier to argue with and then be able to walk back from the argument sooner.

men are more forward, at least initially. two girls could have a crush on each other for ten years and never work up the nerve to mention it.

men usually want to hammer out plans towards the end of a date (for the next date) but women are usually more go with the flow lets see what happens.

oh and girls are much, much better at handling rejection and boundaries. actually, just one “much”; i’ve had incidents here and there that were pretty awful from girls, but much more often, men are really bad at rejections on like, any level.

– Far_Ad_8813

9. Grading on a curve

As a bisexual woman I find it’s easier to date het men, bi-men, and bi women. Lesbians are much more difficult to date. Not because of who they are personality wise, but it’s hard to find a lesbian who will date a bisexual woman period.

I have no idea what the stigma is but it’s there. It seems like some lesbians are certain you’ll leave them for a man or cheat on them. I’ve never cheated on anybody. Ever.

Also, they sometimes are just all around uncomfortable you find men attractive. There’s definitely bi-erasure in the LGBTQ community. I’ve had fantastic dates or discussions with lesbians and when it comes out I also liked and dated men they bail.

– Lil_Elf81

10. On guard?

Bi man here.

I’ve always found it much easier to date men because they are much more straightforward, and the fact that they already like men seems to make it easier for them to adjust to me (though there is a lot of biphobia and dismissal of my sexuality).

With women they tend to be a lot more guarded and more easily put off, simply because they are likely to be straight and the idea that I am versatile and all that makes them feel weird I guess.

And like someone said earlier, men tend to stick less to their category than women! I’m like, 6 or 7 I’d say and all kinds of men have been into me, but women who are objectively hotter than me tend to be more dismissive

– CallumSmith9895

11. The rundown.

Bisexual woman who’s been in a serious relationship with one straight man and three bisexual men, and has briefly dated one bisexual woman. This is just from my experience, but I’ve noticed a person’s sexuality has a decent amount of bearing on their personality too.

Straight man:
Decent dude, but I had a lot of the standard complaints straight women have about their straight male partners; aloof at times, didn’t always take interest in my interests, often spoke over me and my concerns, etc. The gender roles were more “traditional” too, at his insistence more than anything. He also held a lot back, so even if something was bothering him, he wouldn’t talk about it because he hated talking about his feelings. It was an alright relationship, but it felt very straight.

Bisexual men:
The best of both worlds, in my opinion. You get the security of a male partner (walking with them at night, having backup from creeps in public, etc), as well as the implicit understanding that comes with being with another queer person who get it. They tend to be more secure in their masculinity. One of them loved farmer’s markets, another asked me to teach him how to crochet. It’s very refreshing to be with a guy that’s openly himself. They can also get more emotional, both for better and for worse.

Bisexual woman:
She was more of the bisexual stereotype, of the “will take anything that moves” variety. She was bright, intelligent, ambitious and I really respected her work ethic, but she has no interest in settling down romantically. We’re still friends, though I keep her at arm’s length for my emotion’s sake, since I really liked her.

I’ve yet to date a lesbian (in my experience, they tend to look down on bisexual women) or a nonbinary person (not for lack of trying; I’ve pursued a few but nothing’s stuck yet), but honestly, people are people. Being bisexual’s just helped me see that in a more direct manner.

– InfernoPotatoFull

12. Dropping hints.

Women are, in my experience, way worse at communicating what they mean clearly.

They think their “hints” are clear – they aren’t (I include myself on this, for the record).

Men, on the other hand, tend to be way too blunt and terrible at nuance – it’s far more black and white and many have no idea that the tone they speak in is as important as their words.

– FuzzyRoseHat

13. On the downlow.

Bi-male here but still closeted (is that an apt term?)

All the women I came out to were cool with it, yet acknowledged the fear about cheating with men.

There’s definitely a huge difference between gay men and DL men. Gay men can be clingy and never stop talking. DL men have sex and then usually f**k off or sit and watch sports, which is great because they don’t talk too much. I’ve never truly “dated” a man so I guess my experience is limited.

– Ilfubario

14. Level up.

Bi-fem.

Women tend to be on the same level as me and just know how my mind works, even thought were both complicated in a twisted way, and they give me mega snuggles on my period.

Men take a HOT minute to half understand my brain and just give me some chocolate on my period or say “oof that sucks.”

– bubblebeanUwU

15. Come on over.

Female 20 technically Pansexual

Men will usually say: “You can come over if you want.” Women say: “I want you to come over.”

(Most) Men want to be taken literally and be straight-forward. They want their partners to know they are honest but also independent.

(Most) Women want their partners to feel wanted or needed and use that in their speaking, especially over text. They are a lot more into the small details about the relationship.

– GalacticPhoxx

You learn something new everyday.

What would you add to this conversation?

Let us know in the comments!

The post Here’s the Real Difference Between Dating Men and Women – From the People Who Know appeared first on UberFacts.

June 7, 2021

Things That Are Supposed to Be Hot, But Really Aren’t At All

You ready to have a good time?

You wanna try out some things that probably the internet convinced us would be hot, only to find out that they’re really difficult and disappointing and gross?

Then come with me to this Reddit thread…

What’s supposedly sexy but really isn’t? from AskReddit

Ah yeah. That’s right. This is gonna suck in all the wrong ways.

1. Using whipped cream in bed.

Stick away from whipped cream. Go for non-dairy. The milk products can give you a yeast infection. Cool whip is a better choice.

ETA: Apparently anything with sugar can give you an infection. Play safe y’all.

– Mrs-CMR

2. Doin’ it in a hot tub.

Putting it in while submerged shoves the water up in there and creates pressure which causes a lot of problems for her.

I know so many random things thanks to Dr. Sue….. That show was great.

– 0kokuryu0

3. Sessions that last for hours.

She gets very turned on when I don’t last as long as I would like to.

But she takes pride in the shortness of it all.

She would rather go for multiple short rounds than one long one

– dndascher

4. The banana thing.

Maybe this is just me but I don’t find it s**y when someone “suggestively” eats a phallic food item like sausage, bananas, popsicles, etc. It just looks silly.

Not to mention the fact that most people end up biting into those foods when they eat them, so if it’s supposed to be a stand-in for your d**k, it’s not an arousing thought.

– Omny87

5. Baby talk.

A friend of mine told me about going on a date with a woman and how it was going pretty well until they ended up having s** and she started doing all this cringey pursed-lips p**n actress stuff and ooohing in a baby doll voice.

His imitation was hilarious.

– monkeyhind

6. Big cosmetic surgery.

Huge lips, massively sharpened nose and face, breast or butt implants that could be used as a life raft.

Like, you look like some kind of uncanny valley s** doll monster instead of a human being.

– 4zero4error31

7. Super loud moaning.

like the fake p**nstar level moaning and above.

A guy (my neighbor) and a girl in my building are dating, and I constantly have to hear her near-screaming through the wall.

I don’t know how anyone can get off hearing that, it’s so annoying.

– Sunn_Flower_Jin

8. Increasingly unrealistic expectations.

Imagine being exposed to the kind of p**nography available today at the age that you were exposed to p**nography.

Unsettling stuff.

– frenchpotatoedip

9. Family connections.

I’ll talk about this here, but really it could also go in a post about “what do movies always get wrong”. It goes like this:

[Male character walks over to talk to attractive female character]

Man – ‘what’s your name’?

Woman – ‘(insert female name here)’.

Man [now slightly more interested] – ‘that was my mother’s name!’

I’m sorry, but I for one am NOT looking for a woman who shares the same name as my mother. In fact, for me that would be a bit of a turn off. Even if you were just looking for a one night stand, I don’t want to picture my mother when I’m with a woman in bed.

– Group_of_no_one

10. Those ahegao faces.

Plenty of people cross their eyes slightly when something hits just right, but it’s usually as their eyes roll back and close.

And yeah, a lot of us open our mouths when we’re getting into it (mostly because we’re breathing heavily), but sticking the tongue out? No thank you.

– anxiousthespian

11. American strip clubs.

Sooooo not s**y.

I did have a great experience at a club in Amsterdam though.

That club had a circular bar and both nude men and women would dance across it.

So interesting, just had to keep covering my beer…cause….pubes.

– Seattle_sucks

12. Feet.

I read on a different subreddit the other day that explained that the parts of the brain that correlate with genitals is very close to the one that correlate with feet.

Sometimes those areas get a little too close which causes the attraction.

Don’t know how accurate this is because I really have no desire to science this.

– -Four-Foxx-Sake-

13. Power dynamics.

I’m not into aggressive people at all, and I don’t think it’s “hot” when someone is always trying to wrestle you for some kind of imaginary control.

I know others get turned on by this, but it’s one of my bigger red flags.

– SiddharthaSuburbia

14. Making a big show of jealousy.

It can be insecurity in the relationship and/or themselves. For myself my partner was my first relationship and sometimes you think you want a romantic gesture and for love to be more movie-like, when in reality it’s not really what we were sold growing up (whether that’s from parents, media, etc).

Also if you’re bored, drama is fun. Shades of borderline personality tendencies. Also needing attention.

I didn’t have a relationship til I was 25, and I feel confident if I had in teenage or college years I would’ve been a h**la toxic partner.

– notnotaginger

15. Too much cologne/perfume.

I like equating it to how much attention a person thinks they deserve.

Too little and you don’t want any attention and it’s more for your own enjoyment.

Just enough and it’s for the people around you (or the people you want around you) to notice.

Too much and everyone in the rooms knows that you want to be the centre of attention.

– Tolvat

Welp, difficult to kill the mood any harder than that.

What would you add to this list?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Things That Are Supposed to Be Hot, But Really Aren’t At All appeared first on UberFacts.

May 19, 2021

People Talk About Whether It’s OK to Restrict Your Partner’s Online Watching Habits

Hold onto your hats, because today we’re diving into one of the most genuinely controversial things posted to Unpopular Opinions in a while.

And it’s all about…”adult entertainment.”

I don’t want to be in a relationship with someone if they watch pr0n.
Now don’t downvote this because you disagree, I know its an unpopular opinion, but I am genuinely uncomfortable by people watching pr0n while they’re in a relationship with me. It honestly feels like cheating. Why would you need to get sexual gratification somewhere else when I am literally right here willing to give you all the material you could ever want? Why do you need to get that from another woman?

I’m currently in a serious relationship and I’ve talked this through with my partner and he is ok with it and respects my boundaries. I am completely committed to the person I’m dating and I will only go to them for things that I deem exclusive to a romantic relationship, therefore I expect the same from them. When I masturbate I only masturbate to them and I expect the same. When I feel genuine romantic emotions, I only feel them toward them, and I expect the same. The reason being is that I am very, very serious about long term relationships and I’d feel like I was doing something very wrong if I thought of anyone else in this way.

If you’ve discussed it with your partner and you’re both ok with pr0n, thats cool, but I’ve been pressured by multiple people in the past to act like I’m ok with it, but I just never have been. Pr0n is something I’m highly uncomfortable with, it makes me feel jealous and betrayed and it makes me feel like I’m not good enough. Those should be valid emotions to feel, but people try to make it seem like its irrational to feel that way when I truly believe it isn’t.

I know a lot of people feel the same way as me, just know that its ok to set boundaries in your relationship because your feelings are just as valid as your partner’s. That goes for anything, really.

Turns out the people of Reddit have a LOT of thoughts and feelings about this.

1. Some gave kudos.

Great post.

You know what you want in a relationship, discussed it with your partner, came to an understanding that you both agree upon.

That’s exactly how it should be done.

– drmarts1973

2. But is this openness or just intimidation?

If my partner was adamant about me not watching p**n to the degree that they’d consider it cheating if I did, I would never in a million years share my deeper sexual desires with them.

Now, that’s just me personally and if you guys do communicate a lot and well there’s probably not an issue but I think this is the one thing you’re missing; As far as YOU know he doesn’t have sexual desires you wouldn’t be comfortable with, but you’ve taken such a hard stance on something far less consequential that it kind of implies that you’d have a negative reaction to, for example, very kinky s**.

This isn’t guaranteed or anything, but based on your post and what I’ve read of your responses that’s at least how I’d personally feel.

– Pridetoss

3. Well that’s…um…

Bruh my ex didn’t want me to watch p**n back then and she only wanted to have s** every six months. My s** drive is off the f**king charts. I don’t want to force her soooo.

We all know how that end up lmaoo.

– chili_oil_best_oil

4. Some called red flag, no question.

Wtf is this thread. It’s very unhealthy to try and control people’s behaviour and s**ual expression. Your bf can’t control how you dress. Or who your friends are.

“But it makes me uncomfortable”

Yes that’s what possessiveness is.

This isn’t an unpopular opinion it’s an unhealthy one. You can’t encourage people to be so clingy and anxious. Your bf can only c** if he thinks of you? When someone is in a relationship they can literally only ever think of you?

Doomed to failure. Instead you need to learn how to cope with other people’s behaviours. You need to learn that love isn’t meant to be all encompassing. Your partner shouldn’t be the only person in the world.

I would really consider it a red flag in any relationship.

– Kaiisim

5. The term “thought policing” came up a lo.

I can get the p**n thing, but expecting to be able to police your partners thoughts? That’s borderline abusive.

It’s so unhealthy and OP really should examine why she feels so insecure in her relationships that other women can’t even take up any space in her partner’s private thoughts.

– scottishlastname

6. And then this person wrote the opposite diatribe.

Watching people in this thread absolutely bend over backwards to defend the idea of watching p**nography is insane to me.

How is it controlling to ask your partner to not watch other people f**king? Would your opinion be changed if OP’s partner were going to a friend’s house to watch two people f**k and bate in the corner? (I’m not trying to strawman; this is a genuine question because in my mind they are not very different from each other.) P**n has been proven time and time again to impact sexuality. Wanting your intimate relationship with your partner to progress at a natural pace is not controlling, imo.

People are bringing up the idea of “thought policing” in regards to OP’s partner’s masturbatory practices. While I can sort of understand arriving at that conclusion, I highly doubt OP is popping in every time their partner masturbates to be like “hey, make sure you’re thinking about me.” I’m pretty sure it was a one time conversation where she made her preferences known, and she trusts her partner to make private decisions in regards to that boundary.

I understand that people have s**ual needs, and that sometimes they just want to c**. I do not think that all people who use p**nography on a regular basis are bad people with ill intentions. However, when you’re in a long-term relationship with someone, I don’t think its controlling or insecure to ask your partner to not watch p**n. P**n is idealistic and largely plays at humanity’s base fantasies – aka, big breasts/penises, “ideal” looking genitalia, and overall extremely “attractive” people. I’d feel pretty insecure if my partner was consistently seeking sexual content from people who look very different from me.

Idk, maybe I’m the weird one here, but I agree with OP. I don’t think its controlling as long as it’s something that’s talked about early and with tact in a relationship. If you wouldn’t want to date somebody who wouldn’t want you watching p**n, that’s fine!! But defending p**n as a morally neutral thing is just pretty silly, imo. I just think it’s weird that people are accusing OP of being controlling and trying to change her opinion. There are plenty of valid reasons to dislike p**n, especially in a long term romantic relationship.

– LegitAllergic2TheSun

7. Is it insecurity? Or a reasonable expectation?

The only time a gf had a problem with p**n was when I was 18 and she was really insecure.

I especially wonder about the part where OP expects him to only think about her during masturbation. It might work in the early stages of a relationship, but I think it’s completely unrealistic for a relationship that lasts several years.

Chances are, because of how strict she is about this stuff, he’s just gonna lie to her about it. And honestly I think it’s perfectly harmless if he does. Those are his private thoughts after all, they don’t necessarily mean anything.

– HighwayTemporary3266

8. “To each their own.”

I couldn’t imagine asking someone to not watch it. To each their own though.

As long as you find someone who’s comfortable with your boundary, you are in the right mind.

Happy you’re expressing your feelings. Most people wouldn’t.

– MavenMermaid

9. Love the use of “unorthodox” here.

I don’t really think this is crazy, a little unorthodox, but I’m guess there are more people who’d prefer their significant other didn’t watch pr0n than do

– Butterfriedbacon

10. There’s a broader question of the industry in general.

I agree with you, but in my case it goes beyond that. I just don’t like that people in general support this f**ked up industry… Luckily for me, both me and my boyfriend think like that, so it’s fine.

– NineTailedDevil

11. Most dissenters were caught up on one particular element.

‘When I masturbate I only masturbate to them and I expect the same.’

Red f**king flag. I’d jump ship as soon as I heard that, and I don’t even remember the last time I watched p**n. I prefer reading it.

You don’t get to control your partners thoughts and trying to is abusive.

– left_tiddy

12. How bad is the harm?

I don’t think it’s wrong to feel that way.

P**n is addictive in nature and twist people’s perceptions of what intimacy should be like.

I’m willing to say that it has destroyed more relationships than anyone is willing to admit.

– Emanouche

13. Is it a together thing?

I mean everyone has their own boundaries which is fine.

For me I don’t like the idea of my boyfriend looking at another girl’s nudes at all, and probably wouldn’t be comfortable with p**n unless we watched it together.

– keIIzzz

14. Maybe it’s downright courteous?

Tbh I think when people in relationships watch p**n is because they don’t want to make their partners uncomfortable by hounding them with their needs.

In fairness, one person is always gonna be h**nier than the other, and watching p**n instead of making your partner uncomfortable is actually pretty solid logic.

– IzJusMeOG

15. “The hub.”

I’ve straight up had my girl hand me her phone with the hub opened up because she didn’t wanna deal with it lmao

– someguyat3am

An enlightening conversation as always, Reddit.

What do you think about this?

Give us your opinion in the comments.

The post People Talk About Whether It’s OK to Restrict Your Partner’s Online Watching Habits appeared first on UberFacts.

April 3, 2021

Interesting Stories About What It’s Like To Be Sterile

The terms “sterility” and “infertility” are often used interchangeably, though there are distinctions in the world of medical professionals.

Both terms refer to an inability to create offspring (or to put it in a less creepily clinical way, have kids) and can be a significant issue in the lives of many.

It can happen to anyone, for a huge number of reasons, and be temporary or permanent. In other words, there’s just no knowing who it might strike. Here are some stories from people who have been there.

10. Big surprise!

A sterile diagnosis can’t really be 100% sure…

Source: Whisper

9. Shoot your shot

Is this a really weird sequel to A Christmas Story?

Source: Whisper

8. Stay

Absolutely tragic.

Source: Whisper

7. Oh boy

Remember, there’s always adoption!

Source: Whisper

6. The end

It may sting for now, but who shares your genes is not as important as who shares your love.

Source: Whisper

5. It’s a miracle!

Or a misdiagnosis, but, either way, congrats!

Source: Whisper

4. Love me

Don’t beat yourself up, this is far from a dealbreaker for most people.

Source: Whisper

3. Have a heart

Better to build on honesty now.

Source: Whisper

2. Acting up

Gotta love a happy ending.

Source: Whisper

1. The bummer

Sometimes the feelings are as simple as that.

Source: Whisper

I think it bears repeating that if you can’t reproduce on your own, there’s always adoption. In the United States alone there are over 100,000 kids waiting for homes right now. And it might just be the most rewarding adventure of your life.

How would you feel if you found out you were sterile?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Interesting Stories About What It’s Like To Be Sterile appeared first on UberFacts.

April 3, 2021

People Who Waited Until Marriage to Have S*x Share Their Experiences

I grew up in a religious family and was taught in no uncertain terms that it was an absolute moral necessity to save sex for marriage, and a mortal sin not to.

Cut to…several years later and I’ve never been married but have done the sex. So far this shirking of my moral duty hasn’t resulted in anything terrible, but we’ll wait and see, I guess.

I’ll never know what it would have been like had I stayed on that prescribed path, but the people behind these confessions do.

10. Guy stuff

Hey man, it’s all good.

Source: Whisper

9. The pain

The fact that’s often very painful at first for women seems suspiciously absent from abstinence education.

Source: Whisper

8. No takesies backsies

See, this is why I feel like it’s a bad idea. What if you’re not sexually compatible?

Source: Whisper

7. Ride in style

Welp, best of luck with all that.

Source: Whisper

6. Passed out

Sounds like a lovely memory.

Source: Whisper

5. The regret

Such a big part of life to leave to chance.

Source: Whisper

4. The cost

There’s a lot more to this story I’d be interested to know.

Source: Whisper

3. Two weeks

You’ll forever wonder what others would have been like.

Source: Whisper

2. Awaited

It sure does take a lot of patience.

Source: Whisper

1. Keep it

Glad it worked out for you.

Source: Whisper

Yanno, to each their own. My only two cents would be that it’s YOUR decision to make. No one else gets to dictate it for you.

What do you think about this?

Chime in in the comments.

The post People Who Waited Until Marriage to Have S*x Share Their Experiences appeared first on UberFacts.

March 28, 2021

Ladies Share the Best Things to Say to Them in Bed

We’ve all heard painful stories (or even experienced them first hand) of saying the wrong thing in bed and totally killing the mood.

How do we avoid such things?

Reddit has some insights.

What do girls want guys to say during sex? from AskReddit

Let’s see if we can’t pick up a few tips.

1. Just play.

Once, I let my boyfriend just play with my boobs for as long as he liked.

I was surprised how long he wanted to just lie there and play with them – maybe 45 minutes?

It was so sweet and funny when he said, totally serious, “this is like a dream come true.” I’ll always remember that.

– aimeed72

2. Holy smokes.

I’m not typically into talking during sex (me or my partner) but I once had a dude tell me I was a goddess while I was on top of him.

Instant confidence boost, felt 10,000% sexier.

– Nikkomus

3. Vocalize.

Words aren’t necessary but if you’re feeling pleased do vocalize it. Silence or just looking at me is odd. I want feedback.

Say what feels good, if you want me to do something or stop doing something. Moan, groan, swearing (i know it’s not just me who loves it when they’re so turned on the whisper ‘f*ck’. Makes me feel very confident). Communication is a turn on. Say our names will make us crazy.

– IDontHave20Letters

4. Say something nice.

Some compliments are nice. Complimenting my body like “wow you look so sexy” or “your breasts look so good right now” Or complimenting my skills like “you sure know how to suck a d*ck” or “mm you are so good at riding me”

Also I love when a guy asks “ does that feel good” or “do you like having my c*ck inside you”

Also I love when a guy tells me before he is going to finish so I know, like “you’re about to make me c*m babe”

– Excellent-Raccoon-32

5. The classics.

“you’re so f*cking tight” and I like when a guy’s eyes roll back and their knees get weak when they c*m.

I think it’s hot as f*ck. I think I care more about the actions they do over verbal though.

– shinywatersoul

6. Let me know.

Nothing particular. I just want to know if my partner is really enjoying that. I absolutely hate it when men are so silent during sex that I can even barely hear their breathing. Moaning is super hot. Doesn’t have to be super loud porn moaning, but some ohs, ahs and mmhms are strongly appreciated. And obviously I want him to tell me if he is uncomfortable/in pain/cold/I am bending his d*ck to a wrong direction too much/he wants to change position.

Some compliments are also good but it’s super important to make your girl feel SPECIAL so AVOID saying things like “I love how girls bite their lip like that, it’s so sexy”. “I love how YOU bite your lip like that”. And typical stuff like “You’re so hot” are totally okay.

– -acidlean-

7. A teachable moment.

Instruct me like it’s my first time.

I want to know exactly what you want.

– MayUrSh*tsHavAntlers

8. Testing the waters.

I think the most important thing is that you try it out with your partner.

I (m) was quiet in the early days of my relationship of almost 6 years now. And she asked me why I didn’t moan, I said I didn’t know. I tried it the next time. To an extent I would be comfortable with and she was loving it. So I did it more and more and we found out she basically just likes when I talk dirty to her when we do it.

I little time ago she said she wanted me to be a little more dominant in the words I say. So I tried. I called her something, she didn’t like it, so she told me and we came to terms on a different word I could try instead. Also I might be that you only like something when you are really turned on. So just jumping in at the deep end is not a good idea. Get warmed up first.

It’s all about going at a pace where both parties are comfortable and then only when both are comfortable THEN you can try to push those boundaries. Tell what each of you liked and what you disliked.

– Claptrap_Ninja

9. What’s the vibe?

It depends on the mood of the sex.

Lovey? “I love you sooooo much” with a lot of emotion in it goes pretty far. Or a breathless “you’re beautiful”

Kinky roleplay? (I am the sub): “You’re just my little f*cktoy and I can do whatever I want to you.” or the equivalent but shorter “you’re mine”

Either case or just regular vanilla sex? “It feels so good inside you”, “god I love your…” (insert body part here)

And yes, moans, heavy breathing, grunts, anything to let me know you’re enjoying yourself.

– allergic2Luxembourg

10. Keeping busy.

I expect their tongue to be too busy for much speech for a good portion of the time.

– Dragoness42

11. Vroom vroom!

I know for sure its not car noises.

– Warkitz

12. The hottest of all.

“I’m three months ahead on the mortgage…we can take that vacation to Tuscany.”

– plague681

13. Oops.

The right name usually helps.

– Diplodocus114

14. Wait.

“I cleaned the bathroom and took care of the dishes.”

– Sgarden91

15. Ok, that’s enough.

Softly whisper the lyrics to cotton eyed joe

– Sammi2005-2019

Just gonna jot a few of these down. Might be awkward when I flip open my notepad in the middle of the action, though.

What do you like to hear in bed?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Ladies Share the Best Things to Say to Them in Bed appeared first on UberFacts.

March 28, 2021

Confessions From People Who Fantasize About Their Friends

A close friendship is one of the greatest things a person can have. But what happens when the boundaries of that friendship start to slip and slide and become a little less clear?

Or what happens when that’s what you find yourself WANTING in your head.

When the person you hang out with becomes the person you desire, the dynamic can change quite a bit. Do you risk it all and go after it? Do you play it safe and keep what you have? How can you keep going? Will these feelings pass or just grow?

These are the things doubtlessly rattling around in the heads of the people who wrote these confessions.

10. Face facts

I mean, one dream doesn’t necessarily mean much.

Source: Whisper

9. Owned

Well that is a very specific dynamic you’re wanting.

Source: Whisper

8. Well, now he knows

Doesn’t sound like you’re trying very hard to keep it from him.

Source: Whisper

7. What do you want

Seems like he’s maybe not sure what he wants either.

Source: Whisper

6. The other side

Why not both?

Source: Whisper

5. Dark fantasies

How dark are we talkin’ here?

Source: Whisper

4. Make a move

Are you afraid of what might happen?

Source: Whisper

3. When you’re around

Dang confusing feelings.

Source: Whisper

2. Hold on

Or maybe he IS getting that sense…

Source: Whisper

1. Even if…

The addiction is real.

Source: Whisper

To all the hopelessly crushing out there, we’re with you. Do what you gotta do.

Have you ever been in a situation like this? What was it like?

Tell us about it in the comments.

The post Confessions From People Who Fantasize About Their Friends appeared first on UberFacts.

March 27, 2021

People Shared Crazy Stories About “The First Time”

Most folks remember the first time they had actual sex, but do we all remember the first time we had sex…solo?

It’s pretty much never an elegant or beautiful story. It’s weird. It’s awkward. It can be nice in the contexts of self-discover or coming of age, but in general, it’s just a big embarrassing…erm…mess.

So, let’s look back on it (fondly?) with these real anonymous stories from people about their first times.