5+ Great Facts to Share with Your Friends

Good thing Neil deGrasse Tyson had a change of heart about his career.

If not, we might be seeing him in the flesh, lighting himself on fire.

Don’t believe me? Read through this fact set and you’ll see what I’m talking about.

1. Security blanket

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2. A real tongue twister

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3. Wish we could see it…

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4. Here come the waterworks

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5. Good career move

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6. Hot rod kitties

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Remember: share these facts far and wide!

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7 Ways You Can Tell Someone Is Lying

Science and psychology have some useful tips on how you might be able to tell if the person across the table is being straight with you. There are several good reasons to be able to tell when someone is lying to you — starting and ending with it’s nice to know who you can trust.

#7. They tend to stand very still.

Image Credit: Pixabay

Though it is true that some people fidget when they get nervous, just as many people stand purposefully still. Glass explains scientists think this is because the body is preparing for a confrontation.

“If you observe a rigid, catatonic stance devoid of movement, it is often a huge warning sign that something is off.”

#6. Pointing may become a factor.

Image Credit: Pixabay

People often feel put on the defensive when they’re lying, and will attempt to turn the tables. Watch for increasingly aggressive gestures, like pointing, to emerge.

#5. They may touch or cover their mouth.

Image Credit: Pixabay

If someone doesn’t want to answer a question, they often put their hands over their mouth or lips.

“They are literally closing off communication,” says Glass.

#4. They may go overboard with information.

Image Credit: Pixabay

Glass explains that if someone is giving you too much information “that is not requested and especially an excess of details, there is a very high probability that he or she is not telling you the truth.”

“Liars often talk a lot because they are hoping that, with all their talking and seeming openness, others will believe them.”

#3. You can tell a lot from their feet.

Image Credit: Pixabay

Are they shuffling them a lot? If so, you might be spotting someone who is uncomfortable and nervous, and who would like to be anywhere but where they are.

“This is one of the key ways to detect a liar. Just look at their feet and you can tell a lot,” Glass advises.

#2. They may repeat words or phrases.

Image Credit: Pixabay

Glass says that if someone repeats words and phrases, they could be trying to convince you — and themselves — that they’re not lying. It could also be a way to buy themselves time as they reorder their thoughts around the untruth.

#1. Watch for changes in their breathing pattern.

Image Credit: Pixabay

If you’re close enough to someone to hear them breathing, if they’re lying, you might hear them start to breathe more heavily. You should also observe if their shoulders rise and/or their breathing becomes shallow.

“In essence,” Glass says, “they are out of breath because their heart rate and blood flow change.”

 

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Singles Reveal Their Favorite Question to Break the Ice on a First Date

First dates can be an awkward experience for both people involved, but perhaps the hardest part is figuring out how to break the ice right from the start.

If you have no clue how to do this, let these 15 experienced daters help you out with the questions they’ve found to be the most helpful ways to grease the wheels of the evening.  Who knows, maybe you’ll discover the perfect first date opener in the process.

 

#15. Make or break

“Do they use tabs or spaces?

It can make or break.”

#14. Because I never pass up a “Seinfeld” reference

“What’s the deal with Ovaltine?”

#13. What makes them tick

“Family. Occupation. Likes/ dislikes. Movies/ tv/ entertainment. Travel. Dreams. History of clothing/ accessories they have. Hobbies (this is a great one to get them on a talking train and to quickly get to know what makes them tick).”

#12. You hear about Pluto?

“You hear about Pluto? That’s messed up, right?”

#11. Childhood facts

“Anything about their childhood and where they grew up. You can learn a lot about them based on that, and lots of people like talking about it.”

#10. Very important

“So, are you single?”

#9. Some good ideas

“Their favorite meal as a kid, the ones their mom or dad would make them when they were either down or celebrating. This usually branches to some good honest stories.

If it’s near Halloween, favorite or least favorite costume they ever had is an easy one.

Also I have no godly idea why, but one I found on Reddit is 3) if you could ride any animal whatsoever safely, what would it be? For some that ones gotten me a lot of mileage.”

#8. Trick question

“Coke or pepsi, trick question water. She falls madly in love with you, you tell her to meet you in germany, you go to argentina, 18 years later she finds you, turns out she has a son, its yours, you offer to meet in paris. Jokes on her, you went to japan.”

#7. For your date

“Date questions:

What are some of the small pleasures in life?

Are you close with your family?

What would you do with the spare bedroom in your dream home?

Tell me about a really embarrassing moment in your life.

Fav place to travel?

What do you like to do for fun?

What is your high point/low point for today?

Do you have any nicknames?

Have any guilty pleasures?

Have any pet peeves?

When is your birthday?

Are you a morning person?”

#6. Acronyms are fun

“FORD. Family, occupation, recreation, dreams.

RAPE. Religion, something I forget [*abortion], Politics, Ex’es.

The dos and don’ts.”

#5. Check ’em off

“What is on your bucket list.”

#4. Your favorite animal

“What is your favorite animal, and why is it bigfoot?”

#3. I hope she likes bad jokes

“Do you like Titanic? No wait, That’s a bad icebreaker.”

#2. Answer must be yes

“Do you like bread?”

#1. Paranoia will get you far in life

“Are you wearing a wire?”

There you go — take them or leave them!

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Here Are 15 of the Worst Sounds To Wake Up To

We’ve all probably woken up to some unpleasant sounds in our lives. Some screaming kids? Sirens right outside your window? Heck, even your old alarm clock can seem like the worst sound in the world when you haven’t gotten enough sleep. But once you read through these 15 examples, you’ll realize what you’re dealing with might not be so bad after all.

#15. Old school horror

“The old alarms we all had in college. The little black digital one that plugged in but had a battery compartment just in case. The one that woke you up with that ear splitting EHXH EHCHH EHHZXH sound. . .I still jump when I hear that sound in movies.”

#14. No matter who is doing it

“Vomiting.”

#13. Either or

“I don’t have kids but I imagine that blood-curdling, red in the face scream a young child can do is the worst. Either it’s something serious and that’s terrible or it’s not serious and it’s frustrating.”

#12. For the LOL

“My starfish yelling THE TANK IS CLEAN!!”

#11. Where there shouldn’t be any

“A burst pipe or any other sound of running water where there shouldn’t be any.”

#10. I mean…hard to argue

“A SWAT team breaching your front door.”

#9. An actual fire

“A fire alarm as a reaction to an actual fire.”

#8. The damn kittens

Cat giving birth. Our old cat (RIP) gave birth under the bed right up the end where our heads were and the noise of the cat and then the damn kittens was horrible as hell at 3am.

#7. Ugh go away

“Someone screaming your name.”

#6. First world problems

“Your phone being unlocked by your jealous partner.”

#5. Can confirm

“That, ‘Hurk… Hurk… Hurk…’ sound your cat makes before throwing up.”

#4. You told your ma

“The sound of the garbage truck coming down the block and you gonna get a ass whoopin cause you were gaming late the night before and told your ma that you wouldn’t forget to take the trash out.”

#3. Close by

“Rifle fire. Close by.”

#2. Someone’s in the house

“Girlfriend – “there’s someone in the house”.

This actually happened and I found two smack-heads downstairs trying to steal mobile phones, purse and more worrying…photo albums!

Thankfully they ran when confronted as all I had to defend us was an iron!”

#1. Midwest life

“Tornado sirens. My brain eventually decided it hated them so much that I could sleep through them despite living 100 feet from one.”

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Try Doing These 10 Activities Alone at Least Once in Your Life

We are a social species…but that doesn’t mean we don’t need our alone time. Certain activities, like going to the movies or eating at a restaurant, are often done in the company of others, but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong to do them alone!

Here are 10 other things that you may have been intimidated to do alone, but that are definitely worth pushing out of your comfort zone for.

#10. Check out your favorite band – or find a new one.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

If you’re bored after a set and want to go, you can. If you’re totally digging the band and want to stick around for autographs, no one is going to complain. Perfection!

#9. Go see a play or musical.

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I have trouble finding people who are interested in local theatre or have the time and money to splurge on the latest touring show every once in a while – but just like the movies, why miss out on something you’re dying to see just because you don’t want to go alone? You shouldn’t!

#8. Go to an amusement park.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Spend a day in the sun, riding the rides you want and not having to share your funnel cake. Perfection.

#7. Learn a new skill or sport.

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Take art classes or join an archery club – you never know when you’ll find something you love and meet interesting new people in the process.

#6. Volunteer.

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You’ll meet other like-minded people and engage with a cause you believe in. What could be better than that?

#5. Travel.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Society will try to convince you that traveling alone – especially if you’re a woman – is dangerous and ill-advised. If you’re careful, it’s not, and if you have the money and the time, there’s no better way to spend it.

#4. Take a hike.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

It’s important to be cautious and aware of your surroundings to ensure your safety, but don’t let the fear of going alone hold you back from the awe-inspiring experience of trekking through nature, solo.

#3. Sign up for a dance class.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

It’s great exercise and you might like it – why not give it a try!

#2. Go out to dinner.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Grab a good book or just watch the other people – not having a companion is no reason to rob yourself of the experience of dining out. Even if you do have an SO, going alone can be a liberating experience. Do things on your own timetable and order dessert without checking around first.

#1. Explore a museum.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Chances are that this is something you would do if you found yourself out of town on your own, but something you might not think to do in your hometown – except why not? Even if you’ve been in your local museums before there are always traveling exhibits, and having someone along doesn’t make learning any more or less fun.

 

What do you think? Are you going to try some? I’ve never eaten out alone in a sit-down restaurant so maybe that will be next on my list!

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15 Personal Encounters with Real Life Killers That Will Send Chills Down Your Spine

It may not be easy to think about, but the reality is that there are killers living among us every day. And, unless you had an encounter with one of them, you may not ever be able to tell.

In this AskReddit article, people who have had encounters with killers reveal what happened.

1. Creepy

“A man came to my grandma’s house and said he was having car trouble, asked to borrow a wrench. He followed my grandma into her garage and picked up a hammer and whacked her in the back of the head with it. He thought she had died, her skull cracked open. He just left her there, she lived in the middle of the woods. But she didn’t die.

He was caught before he murdered anyone else, and investigators found all kinds of evidence of him stalking her before coming to kill her. In the months before this she noticed strange things out of place, the sink left dripping, doors open, unfamiliar smells, ect. But then- when she washed the outfits that were on her doll collection, she noticed tears and holes in them- and slits ripped into the doll bodies. She immediately changed the locks. He stabbed her dolls.

Then she came home to a break a while later. They only stole only one thing, an old boy scout pin that her father frequently wore. She looked at it from time to time, it had huge sentimental- (but no monetary) value. Turns out it was him the whole time. No one knows exactly how long he had stalked her. He had stalked and killed 2 others in the next town over before coming to my grandma.

It’s terrifying to think that it could be happening to anyone at anytime.”

2. The Backpack Killer

“My grandparents owned a small cafe in the town of Bowral, NSW Australia. Ivan Milat was a regular customer there, they didn’t know him on a personal level, just a causal “G’day, Ivan!”. They knew his parents as well. Crazy stuff knowing that my grandparents would always be in 1m contact with one of Australia’s most notorious serial killers every couple days.”

3. The van

“I was the first to notice the big white carpet company van that parked behind our house every day around dinner. I must have been 7, and my younger sister was 4. We would play in our fenced-in yard that shared one side with the alleyway, giving anyone walking by a full view of our lawn and the back of our house as well as the backyard of the house next door.

Looking back, I was a total goody-goody and deliberately found any way to suck up to my parents. Our school had just given the typical 90’s “stranger danger” presentation, and had specifically described scenarios where men in big white vans with no windows offered you candy to get in, then drove away with you. I was more proud than scared when I dragged them both outside to show that van out to my parents – like it had been some real-world test. Clearly, I had aced it!

I can’t really recall their response, but I know they didn’t feel the need to escalate it. Maybe they hadn’t noticed the van until the day I pointed it out, but they weren’t bothered enough by it to investigate further.

After we went outside to look at the van, it never appeared in our alley again. A few days passed, however, and by eaves-dropping in adult conversations as goody-goody suck ups do, I caught on that something terrible had happened next door. The boy that lived there was 11-ish (and wanted nothing to do with me or my sister, so obviously we weren’t close) had been taken from their front yard, and neighbors reported seeing a large, white, windowless van drive away. My parents were able to give a great description of the van they had seen in the alley previously, including the carpet store logo – in case that happened to be the vehicle the other neighbors saw.

The police must have easily spotted the van, as I remember the older boy returning home within the next day or so. Being so young and sheltered at the time, I can’t speak to any grizzly details as to how the boy was treated or what happened while was gone. All I can say is that the whole family packed up and moved out shortly thereafter.”

4. Psycho

“Got beat up when I was 10 by a man who was a law professor at a fairly prestigious University. He kicked the living s*** out of me pretty hard. Threatened to kill me if i said anything. I didn’t. I lied to my parents about what happened.

A little while later he shot his family with a 12 gauge.”

5. Mom’s best friend

“Not a serial killer but a mass murderer.

His mom was my mom’s best friend. After the murders happened, his mom kind of fell off the face of the planet. She was already raising her other son’s kids because he was in prison for drug related things, and then him not only going to prison but for murdering 4 small kids and his girlfriend, just completely broke her. I think it would any mother.

He sat in my house and gave me 2 tattoos when I was 19 and gave my mom 2 at that time as well.

His mom kept saying he should ask me out and he agreed and was acting flirty. But not only did I find him wildly unattractive, he was covered in swastikas. He had been to prison, also for drugs, and said he didn’t agree with the ideology but got them to fit in at prison. I could see one of the swastikas was actually in the process of being covered with something else and his mom was basically an aunt to me and me and my mom trusted her. She said he had turned his life around since prison and was a really talented tattoo artist and could give us a discount to add to his portfolio.

At the time, nothing really indicated he was capable of murdering children. The swastikas sent a pretty bad message but I didn’t think TOO much of it after he said it was just a survival tactic or whatever, I have heard of that. He was just kind of a trashy, talkative guy. But after those details came out.. idk.”

6. Dated a killer

“Dated one and didn’t know it. Didn’t actually realize it until he and his buddy kidnapped me and held me prisoner for a week and a half. Turned out they were pretty big-time drug dealers who were also human traffickers who liked torture women to death just for kicks.”

7. Lady in the white car

“I lived in a house and knew all my surrounding neighbors. Landlord next door, his sister on the other side, and the 5 houses across the street belonged to families whos kid(s) went to my school or were acquainted with my parents. I was in 4th or 5th grade at the time.

I was walking home from school one day and it was pretty hot. This lady pulls up in a white car and offers me a ride home. I tell her “no thanks” and continue walking. She follows me for a minute or two before pulling up again and saying that “It’s ok, I don’t mind.” and that she recognized me as her neighbor across the street.

I immediately knew it was bullshit, because I know all my neighbors. I ask, “Ok. What street do we live on then?” and she said that she doesn’t remember because she just moved in recently. I tell her no again, but this time I start to walk in the opposite direction so she can’t follow me. She turns the corner and I immediately run to a friends house that was closer to where I was.

I told my parents of course. A couple days later a friend of mine told me a mexican lady in a white car tried to offer him a ride after school while he was walking home, saying she was his neighbor. He was literally two houses down from where he lived so he told her to f off and ran home. He wasn’t making it up because only my mom knew about the incident at that time. My parents and his parents alerted the school.

Please teach your kids not to accept anything from strangers. I was feeling sick that day and if I didn’t know exactly who my neighbors were, I don’t know how that situation would of played out. My friend was just an a-hole, smart, or a combination of both so we both turned out lucky in the end.”

8. Serial killer

“A serial killer in Florida… our neighbor was found decapitated and after he was found (responsible for 5 murders of women) we were let known he kept a book, inside was all info on my family, what time we usually got home, what we wore almost everyday, what vehicles we drove, descriptions, approx ages and more.”

9. Robert Pickton

“Not me but my mother.

My parents were both heroin addicts in Vancouver during the 80’s – early 90’s. At one point during this time my dad spent about a year in jail, and right after he went away my mother found out she was pregnant. She got clean shortly after finding out she was pregnant and kept off the heroin for the rest of her pregnancy but she was still struggling to get by on her own.

Previously, when my dad wasn’t bringing in enough cash dealing drugs or was in jail (frequent flyer) my mom would end up turning tricks in addition to whatever work she could scrounge up while living out of shelters and getting high. As she was pregnant she was reluctant to put herself at risk of being attacked and was picking up cleaning shifts at a couple of shitty local motels. She would make a bit of extra money by letting a few friends bring clients to the rooms before she cleaned them.

Every once in a while, her friends would send a client her way if she was really strapped for cash. Usually these were regulars that my mom was already familiar with and felt safe around and she wouldn’t turn down the money. One night when she was around six months pregnant, her friend mentioned that a guy had been asking around for a working girl that sounded an awful lot like her but he didn’t know her name. He described the tattoo on her leg, her hair colour, and the mole on her cheek perfectly so it was pretty clear to the friend who he meant. Friend asked if she should tell him where to find her/how to get in touch since it seemed like he might be one of her old clients, but my mom says she got an awful feeling in the pit of her stomach so she made an excuse about not feeling well and told her not to. Before they parted ways that evening they made plans for her friend to accompany her to a prenatal appointment at hospital a couple days later.

On the morning of the appointment, my mom’s friend didn’t show up. My mom called her apartment and when there was no answer, she went over and let herself in with the spare key. Nobody was home. Assuming her friend had simply forgotten, she went to her appointment alone and went home afterwards slightly annoyed at her for flaking. She tried calling a couple times more that night before asking around about her. No one had seen her for the last two nights, which was rare as they were the busiest nights of the week in the business.

Turns out the last time anyone saw her, she was getting in a car with the same guy that had been asking about my mother. No one ever saw her again. Her body was never found, which makes more sense when you find out that the man who picked her up was later identified by witnesses as Robert Pickton, a local pig farmer and serial killer who would grind up the bodies of his victims and feed them to his pigs (pork from those pigs was distributed across the province for human consumption).”

10. Bundy

“Not me, but my ninth grade english teacher once told us about the time she was stalked by Ted Bundy. She was in college at the time and worked nights at a bar. He approached her one night flirting, asking her out, etc. but she wasn’t interested. He was very persistent, and after a while she got angry and told him to get lost.

Later, walking home that night, she noticed a car following her pretty closely. She didn’t look back because she knew that showing any sign of fear gave him control of the situation, so she walked straight into her dorm and warned all her friends. He waited outside for several hours, but eventually gave up.

After telling us the story, she reminded us that if anything like that ever happens to you, don’t go home. Either call the police or go straight to the police station. She got lucky that he didn’t come back for her, and several months later she read about him on the news and recognized his picture and the description of his car.”

11. Almost kidnapped

“Came close to being kidnapped. I know it. The police in my town know it.

I have gone on walks at all times of day and night since I was about 15 or 16. My town is small and safe, but I learned after this particular incident that even the smallest, sleepiest of towns aren’t completely safe. It still gives me anxiety thinking about this night, specifically what may have happened, too much.

It was only about 6 o’ clock, but since it was December, it was already dark. I had just gotten an MP3 player for Christmas, and I loved listening to music and just walking around near my neighborhood. I was just coming down the road to my house when I noticed a car coming around the curve.

I normally would look back at any car coming, even if I was on the sidewalk. I don’t know why I didn’t this time. But it was going very slowly, and I’ve been asked by completely well-meaning people who live around here if I needed a ride, so I was assuming they were gearing up to roll down the window and ask if I needed a ride.

They never asked. I kept walking, got to the spot where the sidewalk ends because my road has a large chunk where there just isn’t one, so you’re forced to walk at the side of the road or the grass. We’re just barely at the edge of town.

The automobile – it was either a dark blue or black jeep – pulled over to the side of the road. Two men got out and began following me down the road.

If you’ve never experienced anything like this, I have no idea how universal this is, but all I can describe is a surge of adrenaline and some sort of primal instinct. One that just KNOWS things. I knew, somehow, that if I were to take off running, they would chase me. I don’t know how or why, but I knew, and I still know that’s how it would have went down. I was analyzing so much so quickly – the running and chasing wouldn’t work in my favor because the stretch of road back home was probably a good 50-100 feet. I thought about diving into the fenceline/field that is adjacent to my yard, but I realized that would hinder me more than help me. They’d catch me, probably before I made it that far.

I realized my only hope was to keep calm and keep an eye on them. I kept turning back to glance at them, and they just kept maintaining eye contact every time I turned to look. I kept walking. Kept calm. But terrified. My house was right there. I would have been snatched up basically right outside it.

I prayed for a car to come by. It almost felt like fate or divine intervention when, no sooner did I silently have the thought/prayer for a car, one came around the curve at the veeeeeery far end of the road from the direction I was walking.

The guys dove into the bushes at the edge of the neighbor’s driveway. They were SO obvious that they were up to no good. I remember having the thought that my situation was super similar to the scene in Twilight where Bella prays for a car to come or whatever and a car does, and she’s grateful. I know, weird thing to think when you’re in that situation, but that’s just how it goes.

So, the car passes, it leaves the area, and I’m wondering how the hell I’m going to manage, because I’m still a ways from my yard.

My uncle was just leaving my house on his bike at that exact moment. He rides up, and I flag him down. He starts to say bye, and I’m just like, “there are two guys in the bushes right now following me!” He looks, and they’re poking their heads out. He calmly tells me to hurry up and get home. I don’t need to be told, honestly. He sits there and keeps an eye on me until I’m in the yard and safe.

I go in and tell my mom, and she sees right as they pull out and drive through the cemetery nearby (which is closed and off-limts past dusk). They then take off.

My uncle calls as soon as he gets home and asks me if I noticed that there was a third guy coming up from behind on the sidewalk. I said no, I’d only seen the two guys. There had apparently been a third coming up, but I couldn’t see him because it was so dark, since there used to be a large gap between street lights right in that stretch of road.

My mom called the cops, and they came out. They told me I did an excellent job getting descriptions of the automobile and the people I did see, since normally people panic and can’t recall details. I was just frustrated I never saw a license plate, but the jeep was behind me and I didn’t get a chance to look long enough for that.

They agreed that the guys were definitely after me, but nothing ever came of it. They kept an eye out in the area and kept an eye out for a dark colored jeep, but I never saw it again.

I’m sitting here trembling now, haha. Can’t tell if it’s because the AC is on and I’m cold, or because recalling this story is always kind of nerve-wracking, because my mind wanders to a lot of what-ifs, but uh… it definitely felt like I had some guardian angel or some shit that kept throwing obstacles in the way for these creepy men. I was actually so afraid to walk down that stretch of road at night for a LONG time afterward, and sometimes I still can’t do it.

EDIT: To answer the question properly, I knew something was wrong as soon as they pulled over and got out of their automobile.”

12. Saved by the pie

“Raoul Moat gave me a cigarette aged 10, the winter before he killed.

I was 10 years old (duh) and walking past a pub with a few older mates. he approached us and asked if we wanted a cigarette. we said sure and he gave us one each. he said he could get us beer if we came with him but we said no partly bc have you seen the him? Hes a beefy guy and we knew better and secondly my mum does the best cottage pie and it was cottage pie night so i wasnt about to be kidnapped on the best night of the week.”

13. Truck ride

“Got a ride in a semi truck from a serial killer.. The smell was horrible. Like something I never smelled before.. Jumped out when I got close to where I lived. The guys face was crooked, and that smell. Come to find out Henry Lee Lucas enjoyed cadavers.. Saw the guy on Tv about a month later, then it all made sense…”

14. Mass shooter

“My family is Black. My mom grew up as his mom’s best friend and my mom was one of the only Black kids at her school (I think the first.) Fast forward and he becomes my cousin’s (mixed) friend growing up and they’re cool and all. Eventually, he moves away after his mom marries some weirdo racist guy. 2 years later, he becomes a super racist and shoots up a church.

I’ve briefly rubbed shoulders with him when I was younger and visiting my cousin and my little brother has hung out with him before. Pretty weird.”

15. Terrifying

“William Strader. From Canada; in Philly in the early 80s. Called himself Jack Snyder; said he had a sick relative there. My friend and I met him in a bar, where he bragged about “killing n*****s” on a train platform in NJ, and doing all kinds of drugs. I found him to be a lying racist asshole and left. She stayed.

A couple of days later, I got home from a work study job at about 11:30 at night. She and I and a couple of other punx were sharing a house. She was lying on the floor, and pretty fcked up on unknown substances. She said she’d gone out w him, done some downs and awakened to find herself naked and Strader next to her. Apparently, he’d roofied and raped her. She was crying.

For unknown reasons, she didn’t reject him right there. He came over another time when I was there. I flagrantly dissed him and left. Later, she said that the dis angered him and that he had threatened me, saying that I had better watch myself. I laughed, still finding him a racist lying braggadocious raping asshole.

Nothing more.

My friend’s mental health was deteriorating, in some part due to drugs, in another to the emergent schizophrenia the drugs had set off. All of this was apparent in retrospect; not so much then.

Shortly afterward, I saw Strader’s face on the front page of the Phila Inquirer: he had been arrested for the murder of a stripper, was a suspect in the disappearance of several others, a college student in West Chester, PA, and two exotic dancers in Canada. Accordingly to the Inquirer, the two dancers had been dismembered.

I showed the article to my friend Su. Doing so may have tipped her into full blown psychosis. She never recovered; is still institutionalized today. In that way, she is another Snyder/Strader victim. I guess I got lucky. Until I tripped over this thread, I had not thought of that summer–83 or 84– in ages.

I still feel kind of guilty, and clueless, thinking all that time that Strader was a no delusional but harmless kook. The “killing n*****s” panned out too, with two men shot on a regional rail platform in Trenton.

Weird and sad at once”

The post 15 Personal Encounters with Real Life Killers That Will Send Chills Down Your Spine appeared first on UberFacts.

15 Foster Kids Reveal What They Wish Their Foster Parents Had Done Differently

Foster parents have the opportunity to make the rough and confusing experience of foster care a little bit easier for the kids who enter into their homes.

In this AskReddit article, foster kids share what their foster parents and families could’ve done differently.

1. Terrorized

“The first foster home that I was in, they had adopted daughters and the older one of the two would constantly terrorize Me by hitting me in the head and pulling my hair and pushing me and just all kinds of terrible stuff. And her younger daughter saw it and even went with me to the Foster mother and backed up my claims of what was happening but she still had me shipped off to another foster home and when she sat me down right before I left and asked me do you know why I’m having you moved? I said no and she said because I can’t have you telling lies about my daughter.

I said I’m not lying and she said well I think you are. Well I never saw her again thank God. I also wish that they knew terrifying it is to be away from home no matter how bad your home situation was. And to live with the knowledge that just as you start to get comfortable and get used to your living situation you can be moved at a moment’s notice. Also how hard it is to have to constantly switch schools and make new friends and try to keep up with the old ones. And to have your things thrown in a garbage bag in a quick move. It makes you feel like you’re worthless and that you’re garbage and that no one will ever really love you like they love their own children.”

2. Time to move on

“My third foster parent said to me that she would care more if the family dog or a stranger on the street got hit by a car and died than if I did. I think it was in the context of telling me her kid was priority. I was removed from that home a bit later.

I choose not to give that woman power over me anymore, either through anger or pain. But for a long time it sucked. She was a teacher at the school I continued to attend as well…

The great thing is we get to move on and choose not to be miserable people like they were.”

3. Conversation

“Someone should have asked me questions. Everyone laid back, letting me talk about things if I wanted to bring them up. Only I was never allowed to bring things up before and I thought their lack of questions meant I wasn’t supposed to talk about any of it. So I didn’t. This extended to other areas too. Once my parent’s rights were terminated, for example, I was free for adoption. They thought if wanted to be adopted, I would ask. But I couldn’t ask something like that, there was no way.”

4. Two different experiences

“First family I was placed with, I did not care for. They liked to punish you, and make you sit in your bedroom all day and all night. My sister and I were together at first, then she was causing problems so they put her in another home. Months later my social worker asked if I was happy where I was, I said no. I was about 6-7 at the time.

They put me in a new home, where the family was huge, and everyone was awesome. They wanted to adopt me but my dad took me out after about 3 years cause the state said he had to pay for me or something like that. Then my life went to hell with my step mom, and I spent summers with my foster family because they were loving, caring and just all around good people.”

5. Culture shock

“Try to remember that they were taken away from their homes for a reason, and there might be an enormous amount of “culture shock” for them in a normal household. My first foster family kicked me out for leaving a tissue on the floor and forgetting to replace the toilet paper roll twice in a row. I came from a hoarder crack house with no running water. For the first several years of my life, I had to use a coffee can to do my business and often times all we had to wipe with was old socks that then went into the trash. So… yes I was in the wrong there, but I still think sending me to a group home was a bit of an extreme reaction. In their defense I was their first foster kid though.”

6. Threats

“That threatening to “send me back” when I acted out, was really messed up. Also that I don’t take threats idly, as you found out.”

7. Not good parents

“You didn’t have to beat me with the sticks you broke off the bushes because I didn’t eat the veggies. I never had them before.”

8. Try to understand…

“I wish they had understood that not letting me around other kids (I wasn’t allowed to socialize outside of school), telling me I was a rude kid, and making me stay in a dark room with nothing to do (they owned a mattress store, and when they were working and I wasn’t in school, I was sitting in the storage room on top of the mattresses (don’t worry, they were wrapped)), was really horrible for my health, and I have had lifelong medical issues because of it, which began while I was living there.”

9. Don’t need to

“You didn’t need to lock up the brand name foods from me. You didn’t need to lock me out of the house any time you weren’t home.”

10. A different experience

“Obligatory not me, but my parents fostered probably twenty kids in ten or so years. They treated every kid that came into our home exactly as they treated their legal children: as family. The things we heard about other foster homes was horrific. One memory stands out most: we had siblings, a boy and girl come for a few months after severe abuse and neglect.

About a week in, we discovered that the girl was only eating half her food at mealtimes and hiding the rest in her room for her and her brother, which we learned is common for foster children. They aren’t always sure where their next meal may come from in an unstable home so they stock up just in case. Well my mom gathered her and her little brother up, marched them into the kitchen, opened up the pantry and fridge and told them that they could eat whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted so long as it was eaten in the kitchen or dining room because she wanted to make sure it wasn’t going to go stale or attract bugs in their bedrooms.

I was maybe ten at the time, the kids were seven or eight and six. They both were just stunned and kept asking, “even this? Even these?” And my mom kept assuring them that anything they wanted was theirs to eat whenever they were hungry. Both kids cried and hugged her. I never realized how privileged I was until I saw children crying over cereal and granola bars. They had literally never been in a home where they were able to eat when and what they wanted. She even made sure that they went shopping with her so they could choose foods they liked.

Both kids were significantly underweight when they moved in and when they left to live with family out of state, my mom was thrilled to tell the case worker that they were both now in a perfectly healthy weight range. After that, when we’d have new kids come in, we always gave them a tour and made sure they knew the kitchen would always be open for them. Around half of them were surprised or even shocked and “tested” my parents by eating things at weird hours to make sure my folks were good on their promise. They always were. I guess my point is that there are some things that seem super obvious to people who’ve never been in a dire situation aren’t as obvious to someone coming from a broken place.”

11. Acting out

“My parents had one foster kid whose birth parents evidently made him smash his own toys to bits when he got in trouble. Was a serious wtf for all of us. Kid did something wrong and you had to watch him to make sure he didn’t destroy something. And I am not talking being mad and pummeling it. I mean being quite and weeping while pulling something apart bit by bit. One of the saddest things I have ever witnessed.”

12. Discarded

“I wish they would’ve known that throwing away all of my belongings (multiple times) would cause me to be an adult who can’t even throw away a broken item.”

13. PTSD

“I wish that they would have known how much my PTSD would effect my life for the rest of my life, and would have forced me to do therapy even though I didn’t want to.”

14. My sister

“Obligatory not me, but my sister was in foster care for a long time. My mom became one of her only constants as she was shuffled from foster home to foster home. I call her my sister because that’s what she is to me, but we were never able to adopt her or foster her because though her step mother was abusive, her father was not and because of our connection to her and the fact that her father would have to sign over his parental rights, law wouldn’t allow it, and neither would he.

I think the thing that stuck out most to me is that a lot of foster parents gave up easily. If a child was difficult in the first month to two months, they’d pass them on. Not to mention, my sister had been placed in homes with 6 or more children living in a double wide or the like with little to no supervision while the foster parents took the checks and used them for themselves. There is so little oversight, and too few foster parents, kids are conditioned to believe they are numbers rather than people to their homes. The best foster homes my sister was placed in were the ones where they took their job seriously as a parent and understood the time it takes to gain trust.”

15. Need a mom/dad

“I lived in foster care from ages 2 – 8, this was partially spent in a group home while my biological aunt who legally fought to get custody from my autistic birth mother who was suing the state to get me back (Child protective services took me at age 2 because she almost killed me).

I just wish people realized that not having a parent around whom you could call “mom/dad” was just so incredibly hard. Even if the foster parents tried to do everything right (like my aunt) sometimes a kid is just sad because of the situation and they act out because of it. It’s nothing personal. It’s just a kid going through trauma and the more patience you have the better.”

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