Category: marriage

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10 Weird Things to Fight About with Your Significant Other

Are you thinking of getting into a long-term relationship but are worried that you might not have enough things to fight about?

Well, worry no more! You can be angry and/or fight about literally anything if you’re with someone for long enough! That’s the magic of human connection!

Not sold on it yet? Just check out a few of the bickering items available to you via these wonderful Twitter testimonials:

10. Interrupted sitcom fantasies

How am *I* doin? A lot worse now, thanks a lot JEN.

9. Unsupervised clothing preparation

He just wants you to see how much better he is at it now than he used to be. He’s come a long way.

8. Simultaneous jump scares

At last, my long and very stupid plan has come to fruition.

7. Attire retirement and comparative virtual culinary efficiency

Um. What?

6. Presumptions of retail scheduling

Ok but like, you do know though.

5. Head comfort and dental applicant cleanliness

This is some whataboutism at its finest.

4. Lack of comedic appreciation

As a guy who works in comedy, I get it, but also, don’t be this person.

3. Container percentage requirements

Some see it s half empty, others are correct.

2. Plumbing placement

We’d ALL use it.

1. Televised spoiling

My guy, that show ended more than 20 years ago.

If you’re not sold yet on the idea of really mixing it up with someone over nothing, just hop on Twitter yourself and start scrolling, there’s plenty more where that came from!

What’s the dumbest thing you and your S/O have fought over?

Tell us in the comments.

The post 10 Weird Things to Fight About with Your Significant Other appeared first on UberFacts.

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10 Really Dumb Things Couples Fight About

I guess if you’re in a relationship for long enough, you can just get mad at each other over literally anything.

Especially if, say, you’re in a situation that requires you to stay at home together with pretty much no breaks for months and months at a time.

The couples of Twitter are certainly no stranger to feeling the pressure. That pressure that comes from that feeling that you love ’em so much but also you kinda want them to die for not much of a reason? Take these ten examples.

10. Time management

I don’t know what year any of us are living in anymore.

9. Let it go

Dude. Come on. You did that on purpose.

8. The eyes have it

Maybe ya’ll just need a little bit of breathing room.

7. The secrets we keep

Wait, aren’t you IMDb?

6. Just plane weird

As a lifelong insomniac, I’d like you to apologize to me as well.

5. In the blink of an eye

Given this tweet, I’d guess he was signaling for help in morse code.

4. Chew on that

Gee oh boy, sounds great!

3. Absolutely trashed

I think that placement is pretty much the international signal for “this is not desirable.”

2. A comforting feeling

MAN does this sound like fun!

1. Turn, turn, turn

As long as they’re not licking it, I guess.

I suppose the moral of the story is – if you don’t wanna get mad at your partner over something stupid, don’t have a partner.

What’s the dumbest thing you and an S/O have fought about?

Tell us in the comments.

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Funny Tweets About Married Life That Might Look Familiar

I have a feeling that the shutdown we’re still dealing with during the pandemic has affected married couples one of two ways.

They’re either falling in love all over again and rediscovering that spark that brought them together in the first place…OR they’re ready to pack their bags and head for the hills because they can’t stand the sight of the other person much longer.

Good times!

Let’s hope more people are experiencing the former situation instead of the latter, but you have to admit that this past year has been rough on everyone, including married folks.

But forget about all that for a few minutes and enjoy these funny tweets about livin’ that married life.

1. It’s my turn to go!

Things are getting ugly…

2. That’s a good thing!

It’s bringing you closer together.

3. You guys are wild and crazy.

Tell us your secrets about how to keep it HOT.

4. You’re right about that one.

Come up with a new name!

5. That’s gonna go over well.

Please remember to record her reaction for us.

6. Oh, NOW you’re interested?

Isn’t this always the way?

7. Tell me what’s really going on here…

This just doesn’t feel right…

8. Honey…it’s me again…

Yes, I need the correct measurements again…

9. Does this look familiar?

Oh…whatever…

10. Sounds like a blast.

At least make him clean the garage.

11. Hey, it worked!

That’s the way to get things done.

12. Totally off the charts.

This guy knows what he’s doing. No doubt about it.

13. Listen to my knees, please.

We all get to this point eventually.

Okay, folks, it’s time to spill the beans…

How’s your marriage going these days?

Are you and your significant other at each others’ throats or are things pretty hunky-dory?

Talk to us in the comments!

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People Share What They Think Will Make a “Happy” Marriage

I remember when I was young, my dad said to me, “Son, before you ever get married, you make sure you do one thing to prepare.”

“What’s that, papa?” I asked, a gleam in my eye and wonder in my soul.

“Before you should propose, I think it only right you open up Twitter and scroll through for a while and figure out what a bunch of internet strangers have to say about being hitched. Write those down as a set of principles, and go from there.”

“I will, dad. I will.”

Today, I fulfill that promise.

12. The fry rule

Every day is fry day if you keep the peace enough.

11. The inverse volume law

Well but see that’s when it gets boring though.

10. The playing doctor ritual

These are things we really need to keep an eye out for.

9. The stand-up stare-down

One of us is going to blink first and it ain’t gonna be me.

8. The frosting fortune

It’s too bad, we really had a nice thing going.

7. Corporate culture

Never have I smelled something on this scale before.

6. The call and response

Some things transcend life itself.

5. The rescue reminder

Gotta keep him on a tight leash.

4. League placement anxiety

I can’t let this fall apart on me now.

3. Butter habits

There’s very little that fatty foods can’t fix.

2. The tea trade-off

Hey, we’re not here to kink-shame.

1. The pass-out principle

God I’m so envious of people who can just sleep like this.

And with those bits of knowledge, you and I are both ready. Will you marry me?

What’s your best piece of marriage/relationship advice?

Tell us in the comments.

The post People Share What They Think Will Make a “Happy” Marriage appeared first on UberFacts.

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Hilarious Posts for People in a Love/Hate Relationship with Marriage

The Greek philosopher Socrates once said “By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.”

It seems that a lot of people on Twitter are caught somewhere between good and bad with their spouses and have thus turned into tongue-in-cheek-happy philosophers.

If you don’t understand what I mean, have a look for yourself.

13. If wishing made it so…

Ah, I see what you did there.

12. You’re toast

Why are these things still the most fickle pieces of technology?

11. Work, work, work

We’re all learning brand new things about each other.

10. Sock it to ’em

It’s called the clothes pile and it’s a sacred place.

9. Standard definition

Oh cool so we’re getting a divorce then?

8. The great outdoors

Wow, you’re practically an explorer.

7. On a roll

But did he put it overhand or underhand? Because there is a correct answer.

6. The cold shoulder

Is this dude famous on Twitter JUST for having an annoying marriage?

5. In the mood

We gotta set real expectations for those coming of age.

4. Seek and ye shall find

Solid medical burn right there. Gotta get you to the burn unit.

3. Birds of a feather

I guess we all gotta have a hobby.

2. Shower power

I mean it’s either that or talking about things that bother you.

1. Yes man

Good thing ya’ll are married then, I guess?

I wish you all happy marriages, and happy philosophizing.

What’s your best bit of marriage/relationship advice?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Hilarious Posts for People in a Love/Hate Relationship with Marriage appeared first on UberFacts.

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Check Out 12 of the Little Unspoken Joys of Marriage

Marriage is one of humanity’s oldest institutions and the source of a fair bit of our controversies.

But on a smaller scale, it’s the framework in which you can just get mad at each other for opening cans wrong or whatever.

But don’t take it from me, take it from the actually married couples of Twitter.

12. Sleep tight

I don’t know if you really knee’d me all that much.

11. Shop around

Never shop on an empty stomach.

10. Whose job is it anyway?

Join us tomorrow, same time, same channel!

9. Chew on this

Once you pop, the fun don’t stop.

8. Pack it in

But do you just toss in a couple shirts and pants or do you prepare like you’re going to be staying at that hotel for the next four years?

7. Stay on target

It’s a tough job, but somebody’s gotta do it.

6. Can’t get it back in the tube

These are the kinds of peacekeeping measures our leaders should imitate.

5. Just checking in

Didn’t know if I needed to call the cops or whatever.

4. Well blended

Try to use it to make him something delicious right away, he’ll forget he was mad.

3. This is the way

Ah, alright, I’ll just stop living then.

2. Let them eat cake

Why must we play these games?

1. Spoon feeding

Ok we’ve been joking around a lot but this is serious – some kind of heavy intervention is warranted here.

To all the married folks – here’s to you. Try not to kill each other.

What’s marriage like in your experience?

Tell us in the comments.

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These People Are Living Their Best Married Lives

Audrey Hepburn once said “If I get married, I want to be very married.”

She was married and divorced twice in her life, so it seems like maybe she accomplished the goal of being very married, and good for her.

A lot of other people who fit that description seem to be mostly hanging out on Twitter, complaining/venting/joking about it to the rest of us.

Just take these very married tweets for example.

13. Special delivery

Ya gotta keep things fresh, yanno.

12. Flavor of love

Kinda sounds like you’re both childish but ok.

11. Folding in

Pay attention, because this is going to be extremely important, apparently.

10. Not ok

These are the signs that you are officially slipping into old age.

9. Play the fool

You gotta pay attention.

8. Very alarming

If this were me we’d be sleeping in separate bedrooms. Maybe separate houses.

7. Sleepy time

You set a new record!

6. I scream, you scream

How else am I to enjoy a cool Summer treat in the winter?

5. You’ve been replaced

Your one function on this earth has now been eliminated.

4. A toast to you!

Look don’t make me say it again.

3. A special meeting

Now, if you’ll all open up your binders…

2. The reason for the season

He’s gonna be real confused when those fifty boxes turned out to be one tie, somehow.

1. Must see TV

You know that you can’t look away.

Welp, it doesn’t get much more married than that.

What’s your best bit of marriage/relationship advice?

Tell us in the comments.

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Want Some Funny Marriage Tweets? Here You Go!

Isn’t marriage wonderful?

No worries, no fighting…just the two of you staring into each other’s eyes and falling in love all over again every single night over a candle-lit fire…

Yeah right! Who are we kidding?!?!

It’s a constant battle of Good vs. Evil, Right vs. Wrong…and we’ll leave it up to you to figure out who’s on the “correct” side of your own battles.

Well, now that we’ve come to grips with that reality, let’s enjoy some funny tweets about marriage! Here we go!

1. Hey, this is a great surprise!

Are you sure about that…?

2. Doesn’t seem fair, does it?

Hey, I’m trying to sleep over here!

3. This is some very good planning.

We got a smart one here!

4. Can we all stop doing this?

It’s enough to drive a person nuts!

5. That pretty much sums it up.

And if I were you I wouldn’t ask any questions…

6. That’s one way to prove a point…

Honey, why is there another bottle of A1 open in the fridge?

7. You don’t want to feel left all alone.

I can help you out with this.

8. Everything is firing on all cylinders.

You gotta love it!

9. Yeah, what about those parachute pants?

You should just probably keep your mouth shut…

10. Hey, it might be a good deal!

Give me all the details!

11. You’re really doing it, aren’t you?

Now it’s time to show you off!

12. Ummmmm, you did your nails?

WRONG ANSWER.

Okay, now we want to hear from all the readers out there.

How’s your relationship with your significant other going these days?

Tell us what’s going on in the comments. And yes, we are your new therapists…

The post Want Some Funny Marriage Tweets? Here You Go! appeared first on UberFacts.

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Are You Married? These Funny Tweets Should Look Familiar.

There are some things about marriage that are just universal: arguing over how the dishwasher was arranged, arguing about whose turn it is to take the dog outside, arguing about the wallpaper, etc.

Are you noticing a theme here?

Yes, we’re talking about arguing. And bickering. Because you know it’s all true.

But there’s some really great stuff about marriage, too, right?

Right…?

I’ll let you ponder that question while you read these hilarious tweets about marriage. Enjoy!

1. That thing is now in a landfill.

It was good while it lasted…

2. Remember five years ago…

NEVER LET HIM FORGET.

3. What’s the point of all this?

Mass chaos isn’t going to work in this household.

4. You always have to keep reminding them.

Hey, that’s your JOB.

5. I’m not sure what you’re talking about, honey.

That was a close call.

6. Who knew that this would be rude?

I really had no idea.

7. What’s the WiFi password?

I’ve told you a million times!

8. This is really not easy.

But somebody’s gotta do it.

9. That is what true love is all about.

Life can be beautiful!

10. No, you stop yelling!

And around and around you go.

11. Just keep asking “why” all the time.

It’s enough to drive them crazy!

12. You won this round.

Nice work!

Okay, now we want to hear from all of you out there.

In the comments, give us a life update and tell us how everything is going.

Are you and your spouse getting along or are you both climbing the walls?

We’re here to listen to you!

The post Are You Married? These Funny Tweets Should Look Familiar. appeared first on UberFacts.

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Funny Tweets About Marriage That Will Make You LOL

Are you ready to laugh out loud?

I mean, are you REALLY ready to LOL?

Well, you’re in luck, my friends, because we have a heaping helping of hilarious tweets today that are all about one very interesting topic: MARRIAGE.

And we think that these tweets will not only make you laugh, but a bunch of them might even look very familiar to you…because there are some things about marriage that are just universal, as you already know.

Let’s take a look at these hilarious marriage tweets. Start now!

1. That will teach him a lesson.

He shouldn’t have crossed you…

2. That’s way too much.

This would drive me insane.

3. You were supposed to remind me!

What happened? We had a deal!

4. The ultimate marriage flex.

Show them who’s the boss.

5. I’m not sure what you’re referring to.

Good luck with your new diet!

6. I want to know what love is.

And apparently, this is it.

7. This marriage is RED HOT.

I’m getting all hot and bothered just thinking about it.

8. You kind of sound like a baby to me.

I’m just sayin’…

9. Okay, tell me what happened again…

Start from the beginning…

10. This is gonna get ugly.

This is when you need really good friends.

11. Ooooh, that’s the good stuff.

Keepin’ the romance alive!

12. You don’t want to know that.

Just let it remain a mystery.

13. I second this proposal.

It’s a good idea, right?

How about you?

Is the old ball and chain (male or female) driving you nuts?

Talk to us in the comments! We’ll be your new therapists!

The post Funny Tweets About Marriage That Will Make You LOL appeared first on UberFacts.