Hilarious “Y’all Should Never Have Given Me That $1,200” Memes

Hey, you!

Did you get that $1,200 stimulus check from the government yet?

Hopefully you have by now and hopefully you spent it wisely…

Because, by the looks of it, a lot of folks are spending their money on pretty ridiculous things…or at least they’re pretending to.

Jokes or not, these memes about gettin’ that money and spending it are pretty hilarious.

Let’s take a look.

1. This is what a high roller looks like.

Are you down with this?

2. The elusive Louis Vuitton fish.

A very rare and very expensive pet.

3. I would actually buy this.

And I’d feel great about it!

4. You did nothing wrong here.

Headed to Flavortown! Several times…

5. Lookin’ like a straight-up G in this ride.

Pimped-out PT Cruiser for the win.

6. Holy shit, this is amazing.

I wonder what the interior looks like…

7. Now you’re required to go out and fight crime.

Keep your streets safe!

8. What the hell are you gonna do with this?

Things are about to get very interesting…

9. This is truly one-of-a-kind.

Drive it right into the water and you’ll be fine!

10. What did you do????

Not really sure what to make of this.

11. Money well spent.

Now go take a spin around the neighborhood.

12. That’s pretty cheap!

What a steal!

Hahaha. Those are great!

Now we want to hear from all the readers out there.

In the comments, tell us what you spent your stimulus check on.

I’ll go first! I bought a new pair of shoes and I’m holding on to the rest…for now…

Now it’s your turn!

The post Hilarious “Y’all Should Never Have Given Me That $1,200” Memes appeared first on UberFacts.

Random, Hilarious Tweets to Get You Chuckling Today

Twitter is jam-packed with all kinds of hilarious people who make us laugh on a daily basis.

And since there are SO MANY funny folks out there, we like to do the hard work for you and narrow down the funny tweets into short articles so you can laugh your ass off and then get back to your day.

Just like that! Easy peasy!

Here is a good batch of tweets that are certain to make you LOL.

Enjoy!

1. She’s probably really bored.

Not on top of the world anymore, are you?!?!

2. I’ll be back, old friend.

You’ve been on a big journey.

3. Made you LOL.

I get it!

4. I’ve been doing this FOR YEARS.

And, you’re right, it never changes.

5. It really is almost impossible to open.

Should we write to our Senators about this?

6. Don’t mess with them.

Or maybe you could even join up!

7. Everything has been fixed now.

And we’re all homeowners!

8. This has nothing to do with the current situation.

This is everyday kind of stuff around here.

9. Remember those days?

Hopefully, they’re coming back soon!

10. A little something different.

That went very well…

11. Funny how that works…

Just be careful out there…

12. I’m way ahead of you!

Got mine delivered yesterday!

13. That is really not good.

Do you need some kind of intervention?

I don’t know about you, but I’m laughing…

Laughing a lot, actually!

Have you seen any really hilarious posts on social media lately?

If so, please share them with us in the comments.

We look forward to hearing from you.

The post Random, Hilarious Tweets to Get You Chuckling Today appeared first on UberFacts.

Hilarious Memes About Smoking That Sweet Leaf

As more states across the country legalize marijuana for recreational use, peoples’ attitudes are changing drastically about the drug.

I remember when I was very young, we were taught at school and at home that pot was very dangerous and that it was a gateway drug that would lead you down a dangerous path of harder drugs and crime.

Of course, that all turned out to be complete bullshit!

Anyway, if you’re a weed smoker, we think these memes will make you laugh…and you might to grab some munchies…

1. Ummmm…you look just fine.

Eyes as big as the moon.

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

2. You want some more?

Lisa’s eyes look a little…red…

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

3. Oh shit…I went overboard.

Just play it cool.

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

4. The only thing getting us through this difficult time.

Weed to the rescue once again.

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

5. Daddy is a legend.

He’s teaching the kids about the important things in life.

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

6. I’m down with that!

Never a bad idea.

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

7. This headline is amazing.

I wonder if she ever found herself…

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

8. Choose wisely…

I think I know which direction I’m headed in…

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

9. Can we get out of here, please?

Meet me behind the dumpster.

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

10. Wake and bake.

How many times a day are you up to?

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

11. I don’t mean to laugh…

But I can’t help it!

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

12. When you’re on a mission.

A mission of the highest order.

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

13. Smoke WHAT?

You have to be very specific.

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

14. Trying to cover up your high-ness.

Does that actually work?

Photo Credit: Ruin My Week

Hahaha. I love weed humor!

Now we want to hear from you!

Is pot legal where you live? Is it still illegal?

Do you love it? Are you a casual smoker?

Talk to us in the comments about all things weed-related. Please and thank you!

The post Hilarious Memes About Smoking That Sweet Leaf appeared first on UberFacts.

People Talk About Crazy Things That Have Happened to Them in Their Lives

You never know what’s gonna happen in life.

It can be a crapshoot, so you have to be ready to roll with the punches at all times.

But we should all embrace it because life can be very exciting and unpredictable!

And oh, the stories that people can tell!

Let’s see what kind of tales AskReddit shared…

1. That’s pretty rare.

“I was the best man on both sides of a lesbian wedding because I had dated both the bride and the bride, stayed close friends and introduced them to each other after our breakups.”

2. Oh no!

“When I was 11 years old my chihuahua named Taco was stolen by an eagle while I was distracted watching two lizards hump.

In traumatic shock, I watched the dog fly off into the sunset in the grasp of the eagle’s talons “TACO NOOOOOOOO!””

3. Okay…

“I’ve published four peer-reviewed scientific papers on hamster testicles.

I’m currently working on a critical COVID-related project which doesn’t involve testicles and thus would be much less exciting for Redditing purposes :)”

4. Helping out Dad.

“My dad was on the drug task force and he did a stake out from our living room window for the house across the street from us. His coworkers and himself were in our living room with all the equipment needed and when they sent in the undercover person they caught on tape the person saying “we have to be careful fucking (dads name) across the street is a cop.”

Everyone burst out laughing and almost disrupted the investigation. I was about 8 at the time and thought I was a total badass because I got to ‘help’ my dad in an investigation.”

5. Bad luck.

“I have been involved in 2 bike crashes, 2 bus crashes, 1 drive by bus shooting, and 1 major car crash by the age of 17.

None of them I am responsible for and didn’t have to pay a dime for damages.”

6. Hard to kill.

“Both my son and myself have received Last Rites, yet are still alive. My dad stepped on a land mine AND was hit by a train and survived both.

We’re hard to kill.”

7. That’s quite a story.

“I once farted in a closed elevator with Arnold Schwarzenegger and his entire family back in the late 90s.

My dad was his body guard for a brief period and i got to meet him.”

8. Get that leg!

“I’m an amputee and wear a prosthetic leg. About 20 years ago when I was a teen I was skiing and in a particular set of circumstances which is too long of a story, my prosthetic leg became disconnected from my body and skied down the hill by itself.

My instructor chased it all the way down the mountain. 100% true story.”

9. A fine artist.

“I’ve drawn over 1,000 penises and was interviewed by Playboy for it. Recently I’ve drawn butts that are on display at a local gallery. Thinking about doing a fundraiser called “Kiss My Ass Corona” where I’ll draw your butt in exchange for donating to charity.

Still unsure, though.”

10. A real hero.

“I saved a lot of lives in Afghanistan. My squad leader wanted to recommend me for a bronze star. I begged him not to submit the paperwork unless he also recommended my squad mate, who put in just as much effort as I did.

If anyone saw my medals now, they’d think I was just an average, ordinary soldier who did his job. That’s what I deserve.”

11. Sounds like a good gig.

“I get paid to smoke weed.

I moved my family to Washington in 2015 after weed was legalized. I decided to become an expert and reviewer and did it. AgingEnt.com

I’ve done photography and social media and ad campaigns for the biggest brands in cannabis, over 4000 examples in about 5 years. I had instagram and youtube kill my channels a few times but Im constantly at it and returning.

Done podcasts with some of the coolest people in cannabis and legendary stories with glass artists. I even recently gave my first historical lecture.”

12. A Bieber sighting.

“My ex and I were having a huge argument in a hotel parking lot, my friend and ex’s dad were there as witnesses. Two big buses pulled up and Justin Bieber got off one of them with a security guard and walked right past us.

I was crying and my ex was yelling at me and JB said, “hey, stop that”, my ex yelled back at him “white people shouldn’t have dreads!” and then Justin got onto the other bus with his guard.

My friend was cracking up saying “was that Justin Bieber?” and sure enough, some people in his entourage or whatever were staying at that hotel and he was in town that night for a concert.”

13. A piece of music history.

“The Volkswagen Beetle on the cover of “Abbey Road” by The Beatles belonged to my Grandfather.”

14. Doesn’t happen very often.

“Husband and I fell in love at first sight. Moved in together after two days. Married five months later. Still married.

It will be forty years in May.”

15. I’ve been everywhere…

“I went from being a steel mill laborer to an Executive Assistant of a Cabinet Minister to a stone quarry laborer to a Computer Programmer.

I’ve also been a fisherman on the east coast, a farm hand on the prairies, a telephone system salesman, a pest control salesman and a lumberyard person.

I kid you not.”

16. Before they made it big.

“My step dad is related to John Lennon and used to hang out with the Beatles a lot before they were famous.”

Life truly is stranger than fiction, isn’t it?

Now let’s hear from all the readers out there!

What are some crazy and interesting true stories that have happened to you in your life?

Talk to us in the comments!

The post People Talk About Crazy Things That Have Happened to Them in Their Lives appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share Fascinating True Stories About Their Lives

Ready for some good tales?

Believe it or not!

Anytime you hear that phrase, you know you’re in for a good story!

Well, how would you like to enjoy a bunch of true stories that may sound fabricated but are most certainly 100% true?

Today’s your lucky day!

Here are some interesting, true stories from AskReddit users.

1. Your ancestors were interesting people.

“My great great grandfather was a Pinkerton Detective, acted on Vaudeville, and had 5 wives in 2 different states that knew nothing of each other.

He also slightly changed his last name each time and never got caught until Ancestry website happened.”

2. What?!?!?

“I survived a plane crush in the dessert, was trapped there for 2 days, and was rescued by two dudes who were trying to bet if they can cook an egg in the sand.”

3. Childhood accident.

“I lost my heel in a lawn mower accident.

I was 4 at the time and I wont say who exactly did it. But he was mowing and it was a riding mower and the hitch on the back where you can hook a little trailer, I loved to stand on that part and ride.

Well this time I saw a frog in the grass and being the 4 year old I was at the time, I jumped off the mower and onto the grass and put my hands over the frog to catch it and he didnt realize I had jumped off and he backed up.”

4. That’s just crazy.

“I can smell some illnesses and chronic symptoms.

My sense of smell is normally pretty average, but I can sometimes smell if a person is sick before they start showing symptoms, and have been able to identify/predict 2 seizures, a diabetic blood sugar drop, and multiple chronic migraines before they happened.”

5. Big winner!

“I won two TV game shows. “The $10,000 Pyramid” (won $10,300) in 1975, and “Sale of the Century” (was on the show for 9 days; won $34k in cash and prizes) in 1985.”

6. Wrong side of the river.

“I grew up “on the wrong side of the river”, was considered by all to be the town loser, and went to work as a janitor while still in high school.

In my 40s I set a goal for myself (while still working full time) to take one class at time until I either graduate or die, whichever comes first.

At age 49 I finished my Bachelors of Science Degree, at age 52 my MBA, and age 61 my Ph.D. Never let the arrogant elitists define who you are or what you can be!”

7. Out of gas.

“I ran out of gas outside of La Paz Bolivia.

Luckily it was down hill for about 6km into the city. I coasted the whole way on my motorbike, passed busses and drifted into a gas station. Never missed a beat!”

8. A family of jokers.

“My family ancestry can be traced back to a court jester who served in the court of King Jakob IV of Sweden.”

9. One big baby.

“My grandfather got an award from Mussolini in 1935.

He was just born with 6.3kg (13 lbs 14.2 oz) and was awarded the award of “Italy’s Biggest Baby”.”

10. That doesn’t sound good.

“I once fell over a chair during a massive bar fight, in the process kicking a German marine out a second story windows in the middle of downtown Queensland.”

11. Mug the muggers.

“I was mugged in Belgium, and I mugged the muggers back. Got my wallet and my friend’s purse back.

I’m a pretty quiet low key guy, so no one believed the story, and it’s so disappointing because I’m pretty sure I’ll never be that awesome again.”

12. Born in a storm.

“I was almost named Storm because I was born at 3 am in the middle of a massive tornado storm (one touched down actually a few minutes after I was born).

I was also essentially dead (docs thought they were going to lose both me and my mom) but somehow I lived.”

13. What are the chances?

“I’ve been in 3 fatal train accidents.

Never had a scratch.”

14. Rock star.

“I bought a guitar amp from Brad Whitford, of Aerosmith, when I was 17. He and Steven Tyler served up cheeseburgers for me and my friends.

So, Brad’s son was a punk and I knew him from the scene. I was in a band that had some small local marginal success. This is 97/98 in Boston. I needed a new amp for our first US tour but had very little money. I was getting drunk with his son and, on a whim, I asked him if his dad had any amps laying around that he didn’t need. We laughed and carried on partying.

The next day, I get a call at my home. It was Mr. Whitford himself. He was super nice but to the point. “My son says you got a band and need a good rig for your les Paul. I have something in mind for you. Just gotta have my guy get it from the warehouse.

Come by my house in Norwell this weekend and check it out”. That was the gist of the call. Obviously, the whole band came with me. And our roadie.

We get to his house and it’s totally him. So weird. These guys were like gods in Boston. I wasn’t the hugest fan but knew him from his work with Wayne’s World. He takes me to (one of) his garage(s) where there is this cool full stack. The brand is Bedrock. An old company from New Hampshire that made good quality amps in the 80’s. This one was custom made for Brad.

Basically Marshall components. 4 tubes. All the knobs go to 11. Not kidding. Still has the “property of Aerosmith” stickers on it. He plugs it in and rips a crazy solo on his les Paul and then hands it to me and I play a couple power chords. He asks for $300 for the whole thing. I pay him and he tells his son to give us a tour of the house.

This is where shit gets nuts. It’s just like you expect. Tons of gold records, platinum records…Pictures of him with people like John Lennon, Robert DeNiro and Joey Ramone. Then we get to see his studio and THE LARGEST COLLECTION OF MARSHALL AMPS IN THE WORLD. Seriously, like 200 cabs. A wall of guitars. Guitars so pretty and amps so cool, it made sense for him to find the one he sold me dispensable.

After the house tour, he told us to meet him at the little bar and grill they own in town. When we get there early and he arrives 30 mins later with muthafuckin Steven Tyler in tow. “You guys the punk group?!” He was so nice.

They went in the back and came out with burgers for us all on the house. Then they straight up left. Irish goodbyed, even! I still have the amp. I used it on the road for almost 10 years in five bands. Now, it’s just a conversation piece. But it still works! I’ll crank her up every now and then.”

I love hearing stories like these!

How about you?

Do you have some fascinating stories from your past that you want to share with us?

Please do so in the comments, we’d love to hear from you!

The post People Share Fascinating True Stories About Their Lives appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share Questions You Should Ask on a First Date to Get to Know Someone

First dates are always kind of awkward.

You’re kind of uncomfortable, you don’t quite know what to say, and you want to get to know a little bit more about the person besides what they’re going to have for dinner.

Well, you’re in luck!

The truth is we can use all the help we can get going on first dates and here is some advice from people that you might find useful.

Let’s see what folks on AskReddit had to say.

1. That’s intriguing.

“What are some things your parents don’t know about you?”

2. Okay…

“Which vegetable offends you the most?”

3. You never know.

“What’s your favorite dinosaur?”

4. Always important.

“Do you have any outstanding warrants?”

5. Maybe you can try these.

“What was your first pet’s name?

What was your second grade teacher’s name?

What was the make and model of your first car?

What is the name of the road you grew up on?

What city were you born in?

Good way to get to know someone.”

6. Some good advice.

“Honestly there is no rule book questions you should really abide to. Just get to talking. Start off with small talk-openers like where did you go to school, where do you work, do you like this and that.

Eventually you’ll get around to talking about hobbies/experiences. You can tater off and then talk about your own experiences and just ping-pong off of each other. Eventually you get a pretty good feel of that person as genuine or fake.

That’s how most conversation starts sounding natural with a good flow.

Of course if you get somebody that sees you, and finds you butt ugly, then you won’t get any responses at all. And any questions you ask would lead to no information about them.”

7. Skip the work talk.

“What do you like doing in your free time?

I never asked about people’s jobs.

I didn’t really care how they got their money, I cared how they got their excitement and passion.”

8. Fighting words.

“Ask them who their favorite muppet is.

If they choose anyone other than Gonzo, explain why they are wrong and then leave.”

9. Let’s get hypothetical.

“Lots of hypothetical situation questions, I find they help you understand how they think and prioritize their lives.

Eg. If you could travel anywhere in the world for w month, all expenses paid, where would you go? What would you do?”

10. This one is crucial.

“Why don’t you put away your phone?”

11. Kind of intense…

“Your parents are about to be executed. You are given a chance to save only one of them. Which one do you choose?

Bonus points if you follow up with what’s your favorite ice cream flavor?”

12. Never heard this one before.

“I don’t know if it’s good for a date but it’s fun to ask strangers, what’s your favorite compliment?

It gives you a lot of information and i think it starts a conversation pretty easily.”

13. The good stuff.

“What’s your favourite random fact?

What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve done?

What’s your worst cooking disaster?

What would be the hardest thing for you to live without?”

14. A big one.

“Coke or Pepsi?

Especially if you’re serving them.”

15. Let’s play a game.

“This isn’t so much questions, but a little game you can play that can help break the ice and let you know how well you mesh together.

If you’re at a place like a bar or restaurant look around the room and try to come up with backstories for other people there. It’s can be a lot of fun and takes some of the pressure off, while getting you two talking to each other and getting a feel for each other’s sense of humor/personality.”

16. Cut to the chase.

“Just get it off the table.

Kids or no kids?”

17. This would actually tell you a lot about them.

“I’m stung by a jellyfish, you peeing on me?”

18. Might scare them off.

“If I called you and told you that I killed my neighbor and I need help getting rid of the body, would you:

A. Accept with no questions asked

B. Call the police

C. Start your oven and ask how much they weighed.”

19. The day the world changed.

“Where were you on 9/11?”

20. The nitty-gritty.

“If you had an hour during which any crime was both legal and socially acceptable, what would you do?”

“Are there any social taboos that you feel are a bit ridiculous? Are there any to which you don’t personally adhere?”

“What is the most allegedly unacceptable perspective that you hold?”

21. Just in case…

“What would be your weapon of choice in the apocalypse?”

22. You gotta know that one.

“How likely are you to yell at me in public”

From comedian Sam Morril.”

23. You might bore them to death.

“What’s your favorite pPowerpoint slide transition?”

24. Let’s get weird.

“Open-ended questions that lets them talk about them a bit. Stuff like “what are your political leanings?” “Are you religious?” “What is your stance on the Armenian genocide?””

25. You don’t want to mess that up.

“If their name is an uncommon one, make sure you ask what’s the correct pronunciation.

Literally the first thing I said to my husband on our first date was “hello” followed by a butchered attempt to say his name. He replied “what did you just call me?” and up until that moment, I had never before felt the urge to jump into the nearby creek in mid-February.”

So what do you think?

Would you use any of these questions next time you’re on a first date?

Talk to us in the comments and let us know.

Please and thank you!

The post People Share Questions You Should Ask on a First Date to Get to Know Someone appeared first on UberFacts.

Tweets That Remind Us We Have No Idea What Day It Is Right Now

The great Grouch Marx once said, “Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.” If you don’t get it at first go back and read it a few more times. It’s a delightfully confusing quote about time that keeps rolling through my head in an era when nobody, including me, seems to have any idea where we are chronologically, ever.

At least the people on Twitter are being funny about it. Here’s 14 examples of tweets about how we’re all sort of lost in the wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey stuff.

14. The 8 Commandments

Yeah I think I remember these from The Bible.

13. Days’d and confused

If my phone breaks I think I’ll actually lose my soul.

12. A Planner Darkly

Failing to plan is planning to fail.

11. Thank God it’s whatever

We can start drinking even earlier! Or later? I don’t know how it works now.

10. The days are years

We need a whole new set of idioms.

9. Time is relative

It’s always now.

8. Public service announcement

Quit trying to take Rebecca Black’s job, she has this ONE THING.

7. It slows

I don’t know what “take your time” even means anymore.

6. Eternal matrimony

For as long as you both shall live.

5. Hot take

Whoa there buddy, I’m on Twitter to have a good time.

4. I hate Mondays

I wonder how Garfield feels about this latest revelation.

3. Digital fatigue

Even our robot butlers are bored.

2. Show-offs

Nobody likes a bragger.

1. Oh no…

But the other tweet said…ah, nevermind.

Maybe it’s time to invest in the sundial market. That seems about as sensible as anything else right now!

Oh, also, what day is it?

Tell us in the comments. We genuinely don’t know.

The post Tweets That Remind Us We Have No Idea What Day It Is Right Now appeared first on UberFacts.

Funny Tweets About How Time Has No Meaning Anymore

Do you have the time? I mean, you probably do have some extra time right now. But like, do you know what time it is? Does anybody? If Twitter is any indication, the answer to that question is a firm “No.”

When your usual routine gets thrown off, it’s amazing how quickly your entire outlook goes into disarray. Lucky for us, some of the responses are really funny. Like these!

15. Dish, girl

It’s kinda like how geological time is measured in rock layers.

14. Ok, Google

This is all just a part of their plot to make us fully rely on them.

13. Underwhen

There’s a joke here about being “brief” that, to my eternal shame, I can’t seem to find.

12. Handy rhymes

Then another 90 days of fear,
For each month of the entire year

11. Time keeps on slippin’

Slippin’, slippin’, into the futuuuuure.

10. TGIW

Every day is Friday when nobody cares.

9. Homewreckers

I think maybe it’s Thruzeday?

8. It never ends

It’s a band, I think?

7. It all makes sense

Ushering in a new era.

6. Back to the future

A simpler time when time was literally simpler.

5. Nailed it

I mean, you have a clock and a calendar on your phone but ok.

4. A hard day’s night

I should be sleepin’ like a log.

3. Superimposition

It’s every day, every day.

2. Classic

Tell ’em, Peters.

1. April showers bring indifference

At least I’m the only one who has to deal with me.

Hope you enjoyed that list! But how long have you been looking at it? A couple of minutes? A week? WHAT YEAR IS IT?!

Any tips for keeping to a good schedule?

Drop ’em in the comments.

The post Funny Tweets About How Time Has No Meaning Anymore appeared first on UberFacts.

A Woman Unexpectedly Falls in Love When Her Pet Shrimp are in Peril

We all love our pets. But most of that love is directed at the bigger, fuzzier kind of companion that will show us affection, or in the case of cats, tolerance. But have you ever formed a bond with a pet a little smaller?

When I was a kid I had hermit crabs. “Hermit” is literally in the name. These creatures live to hide in their shell, and if you do actually touch them, they will pinch you. Nothing could be further from a good pet. And yet, they’re a popular choice. And I loved mine till the day they died. RIP, embarrassingly-named-pet-crabs.

But this story is some next level unexpected pet love. A teacher who goes by @thebugchicks on Twitter shares a tale of freshwater shrimp, and near disaster. Read on.

They are strangely cute. Maybe it’s those big ol’ eyes?

I don’t know if freshwater shrimp literally have the capacity to care how big their house is, but, if they do, she’s cognizant of that need.

These two are clearly in very good hands.

Trips to the pet store are often dangerous for me, as well.

At this point in the story, I’m feeling a little bit bad that the last time I impulse bought shrimp was at a Red Lobster.

Despite what the internet may imply, it’s OK to not have strong feelings about absolutely everything.

Here’s where the story ramps up.

I can hear the tense string soundtrack in the back of my mind.

Dun dun DUUUN!

It’s never until we face the possibility of losing everything that we realize what we truly have.

Eat your heart out, Speilberg.

Just a second, adding the word “manpanion” to my lexicon forever.

Maybe this is exactly why he fell in love with you?

*munches popcorn with wide-eyes*

The DOG is the antagonist of this story? But he looks like such a good boy! I don’t know if I can deal with this new twist.

All moments of panic need a factoid or two to settle the mood.

Success!

I’m not crying about some lady’s shrimp. Nope. Not me.

Marty & Sal have no idea how good they’ve got it.

We should probably all be tracking our emotions a little more closely these days.

And that is the tale of crustacean-fascination-turned-infatuation that took the internet by moderate storm. You’re welcome.

What’s the pet you’ve bonded with the most?

Tell us about them in the comments.

The post A Woman Unexpectedly Falls in Love When Her Pet Shrimp are in Peril appeared first on UberFacts.

Here Are Some of the Weirdest Breakup Texts We’ve Read

Technology sure is great. It can help connect us, heal us, entertain us, and enrich us. Also you can use text messages to break up with people, which is probably exactly what Alexander Graham Bell envisioned when he started working on the whole telephone thing.

Enter @weneedtobreakup – an Instagram account dedicated to gathering hilarious relationship texts, including a bunch that, as the name implies, seem to preceded a breakup.

From the brutal to the cute to the confusing, here are some examples of exactly how you can gain an ex via SMS.

13. Pls don’t be offended

At least they’re being honest.

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this seems more like an in person convo.

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12. A new boyfriend

Dude. Yikes.

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and that was the last time anybody ever heard from Jake

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11. K bye

Are you the sentimental type or not?

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Well, this is one way to do it

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10. Poop talk or dying?

I’d cancel those dinner reservations, bro.

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Dinner sounds like the WRONG time to discuss it

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9. Pizza for 1

Eat your feelings.

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Ice. Cold.

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8. You’re decision

No it’s YOUR* decision and now I see why they dumped you.

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We *did* break up

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7. You can pretend though

I don’t think there’s a word for this kind of relationship.

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#fuckbuddyzone

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6. What?

I’m gonna need to see this in context, please.

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VERY LITERAL POTENTIAL BREAKUP

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5. Seriously tho

If you have to ask, you probably know.

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IS THAT WHY!?!? TELL ME!!!

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4. It’s a nice day

Maybe it’s because of your listening skills.

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MID BREAK UP!!!

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3. My birthday present

Gee, thanks?

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Breaking up via emoji is smooth

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2. April fools

It’s bad either way.

1. K bye

Shakespeare himself could not have penned a more elegant tragedy.

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SLEEP IT OFF

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Hopefully we’re all treating our breakups with a little bit more dignity than this. At the very least show them the respect of sending them the bad news over Snapchat. It’s called class.

What’s the weirdest breakup you’ve ever had?

Share the tale in the comments.

The post Here Are Some of the Weirdest Breakup Texts We’ve Read appeared first on UberFacts.