Every culture has stereotypical things that are easy to make fun of, like Americans being classless, Canadians being nice, Aussies being chill, Germans not having a sense of humor…and Brits appearing to have something stuck up their arses when it comes to enjoying life.
The Twitter account @SoVeryBritish parlays these funny British stereotypes into an entire account (and a book!), and they tickle me every time.
12. They just mean “stop talking.”
Please.
Phrases that mean nothing will happen:
Leave it with me
I’ll have a word
I’ll see what I can find
Consider it done!
I’ll make some calls
I’ll think about it
Certainly a possibility
Let’s come back to that
Good idea
Maybe
It’s on my list
Might see you down there
I’ll look into it— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 18, 2020
11. Translates as “please shut up.”
A Brit would never SAY that, of course.
“Yes I remember you saying”
– and saying, and saying, and saying…
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 22, 2020
10. Too, too real.
Never want to cause alarm over something actually alarming.
“It’s a bloody nightmare”
Meaning: Something is proving a mild inconvenience; typically used to describe slightly heavy traffic, or the internet not working“It’s not ideal”
Meaning: Something terrible has happened and life is almost certainly ruined— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 17, 2020
9. It is a truth universally acknowledged.
Wtf, a “plaster?” Really?
You could accidentally cut yourself, on your own, in the middle of a desert, and from somewhere you’ll hear a Brit say: “ooh you should put a plaster on that” followed by “actually I don’t think we have any”
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 22, 2020
8. This is fine.
I enjoy sweating in rivulets, actually.
It’s that hot kind of hot… you know, the kind of hot that makes you really hot
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 11, 2020
7. Unspoken truths.
Everyone knows not to expect an answer after 4pm on a Friday.
“Sorry for emailing so late on a Friday”
“It’s ok, sorry for ignoring you until Monday. Cheerio.”— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 21, 2020
6. I thought we all agreed on this.
Complaining is half the fun.
“Too hot?! You’ll be moaning it’s too cold soon!!”
Yes, because pleasant weather is in the middle
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 10, 2020
5. I wholly support this message.
But also lemons are great in drinks.
When life gives you lemons, just put them in the fridge and go out for chips
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 21, 2020
4. The international language of introverts.
Easy enough, if you’re one of us.
“Oh I’d love to but I can’t” – Translation: I don’t want to so I won’t
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 9, 2020
3. We know you don’t want to hear about it.
Sorry to bother.
“I’ve had better days” – Translation: This is probably my worst day
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 20, 2020
2. Is there a more important aspect of being British?
I think now. Except perhaps buying a good jumper.
How to really enjoy the rain:
1. Stand at the window (inside)
2. Put non-tea drinking hand on hip
3. Sip tea from mug
4. Mutter “look at that rain”, “it’s really coming down now” or “the garden needs it”
5. Say “good job we got the cushions/washing in”
6. Eat all the biscuits— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) June 27, 2020
1. Didn’t want to worry you over nothing.
Again, sorry to bother.
“I’m not feeling my best” – Translation: I’m in hospital
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 20, 2020
Still giggling from across the pond!
If you’re British, make sure and add your own in the comments!
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