Author: Matt Gilligan

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Clueless Dads Who Never Saw The Fail Coming

Dads are many things – protective, funny, gruff, sweet, and yeah, clueless. It’s part of their charm, right?

And you tell me what’s more charming than a guy doing his best, but who never sees a big ol’ fail coming, even though the rest of us can spot it a mile off.

You can’t! Which is why you’re going to love these 12 clueless dads as much as we do.

12. What was he using to swat a fly, a hammer?

Whatever it was, seems like overkill.

11. That’s one way to scar your child for life.

Just one, though. There are more.

https://www.instagram.com/p/B2utqc-lcQT/

10. I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

Men, I swear.

9. That is not how microwave popcorn works.

Or microwaves in general, for that matter.

8. We’re all getting older, okay?

No judgement.

7. In case you were wondering whether there was a difference.

Because this dad didn’t think he would get busted, either.

6. That…is not going to taste right.

Is it wrong that I kind of want to try it, though?

5. How do you miss that?

It had to be on purpose, right? A joke?

4. What is with that almond milk packaging though?

It’s like they want to confuse people.

3. I choose to believe he was pulling her leg.

The other option is too dumb.

2. Someday that information will come in handy.

Dads live for moments like these.

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? #mydadishilarious

A post shared by Citizen Of The World?⛵☀⚓?❤ (@adriennekellogg) on

1. I have no idea what to say about this.

Just…how do you not know that.

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I’ve been a stay at home for more than five years. In May, I started working part-time and this morning I had an event that started before school drop off. My husband stayed home and helped get the kids out for school. Apparently, my daughter decided to wear underwear (not just any underwear but thick diaper like training underwear used for potty training) and told my husband they were “short shorts.” Based on her smile and the fact she locked her door while getting dressed, I’m pretty sure she knew they weren’t shorts!! Swipe ➡ to see the messages that followed once I was informed of the situation, plus a picture of my daughter in school in underwear and the message I received from my girlfriend who filled me in on what was taking place! At least my husband remembered to brush the girls teeth and clean their newly pierced ears… so there’s that! ?‍♀️??‍♀️? . . . #workingmoms #worklifemomlife #headshake #funnymorning #lifeofaworkingmom #stayathomemom #stayathomemomlife #toddlers #threeyearsold #itsagoodstory #lotsoflaughs #lol #todayparentingteam #todayshow #todayshowparents #buzzfeedparenting #buzzfeedparents #scarymommy

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Awww, bless their hearts.

If you’ve got a similar story about your dad (or husband) we want to hear it in the comments!

The post Clueless Dads Who Never Saw The Fail Coming appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Who Are Definitely Having a Weirdly Bad Day

Have you had a bad day lately?

Before you answer, you should probably look at these posts. Because after you see the bizarre ways in which other peoples’ days are going, you might feel prompted to reassess the badness level you assign to your own.

Here are thirteen people who are definitely not having a great day.

14. Key to happiness

The S just hit the fan.

My bird got into every single laptop key… from Wellthatsucks

13. Olive and I’ll learn

I’ve heard of oil spills but this is ridiculous.

I would hate to clean olive that up. from Wellthatsucks

12. Urgin’ the urchins

That’d be just about enough to put me off the ocean ’till forever.

Fifty-three Venomous Sea Urchin Spines (My friend didn’t know you aren’t supposed to stand on the bottom when snorkeling – this happened right when he got in the water.) from Wellthatsucks

11. Bat man

Imagine reading this if you live in a country with an actual healthcare system.

My husband got bit by a bat who found its way into our bedroom in the middle of the night. Here’s our bill for the rabies vaccination with insurance. from Wellthatsucks

10. Beauty and the beach

Oh Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream…

Tried to get a beach sunrise photo. Noticed the sand "art" when editing said photo. from Wellthatsucks

 

9. Degree of difficulty

Make sure you’ve got all the info for your calculations.

When you are from Arizona and think 70 degrees on the beach in Cali doesnt require sunscreen. I. Hurt. from Wellthatsucks

8. Get to the point

There’s something extremely tragic about this but I can’t put my finger on it.

Just picked up the game today…super excited to play. Fell and broke my finger shortly after getting home with it. Fml. from Wellthatsucks

7. Sock it to me

And so begins the walk of shame back home.

Drove 45 mins to the store thinking I had my mask in my pocket. It was a baby sock. from Wellthatsucks

6. The medium is the message

I know that Chick-fil-A has been the subject of a lot of controversy already, but this has to be talked about.

Should’ve saved the money and ordered two medium fries. from Wellthatsucks

 

5. A breath of fresh air

It said “eau de toilette” right on the bottle, what was I supposed to do?

When the perfume you bought your wife for Christmas ends up in the toilet as “air freshener”. from Wellthatsucks

4. Desperate times

We’re still living in a dumpster fire but at least we’re not dealing with this nonsense anymore.

My “bounty” paper towels finally showed up that I ordered at the beginning of quarantine in March for 45 bucks before shipping from Wellthatsucks

3. The hits keep on comin’

Oh quit whining about it, you sound like a broken record.

There are only 100 vinyls of this album and the postal service broke mine in half from Wellthatsucks

2. Fit for a queen

Cinderella’s step sisters be like:

The dangers of online shopping. from Wellthatsucks

1. Poo to you too

That dog knows exactly what he’s doing.

Owner should be ashamed for leaving this dog in a car. But I’m hoping that poo sinks deep into the upholstery for good stinky messy measure. from Wellthatsucks

If you’re the kind of sadist who can’t get enough of this stuff, there’s an endless supply over at r/Wellthatsucks.

What’s been the weirdest “bad day” thing to happen to you lately?

Tell us in the comments.

The post People Who Are Definitely Having a Weirdly Bad Day appeared first on UberFacts.

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15 of the Best Takes on Thor: Ragnarok

Do you remember Thor: Ragnarok?

Almost feels like lifetimes ago now, but it’s been just a few years since the wild and hilarious addition to the MCU came to us courtesy of director Taika Waititi. It was a smash hit, making back about five times its budget and earning over 90% on Rotten Tomatoes.

Disney has always been smart with the Marvel franchise, and that includes course corrections when needed. The Thor installments up to that point had been just a little too heavy and somber – the colorama Goldblum-blessed feast of Ragnarok turned that around quick, and the internet noticed.

Of course, you can’t talk fandom without talking Tumblr. Here are just a few of the best Tumblr fan takes on the film.

15. Absolutely Shakespearean

Turns out most people who spend all their time yelling about how they should be in charge don’t actually have that much to offer. Who knew.

https://lyoness-rampant.tumblr.com/post/174265243357/lesbianshepard-lesbianshepard-i-love-how-loki

14. No spoilers

He’ll just be a little thor in the morning.

https://lieutenant-ash-tyler.tumblr.com/post/169125855529/loki-stabs-thor-thor

13. Origin stories

Don’t you judge me.

https://slartibratfast.tumblr.com/post/167903942615/lieutenant-sapphic-loki-i-know-the-passcodes

12. My cosmical romance

He’s downright chipper by comparison.

https://wesawbears.tumblr.com/post/169428542144/merianymerosmartell-we-all-thought-loki-was-the

11. Green with envy

Something’s not right here.

https://theluckiestclover.tumblr.com/post/169701106876/trickerydickerydock-i-am-diana-odin-hey

10. Heavy times

I’m on my way there too, bud.

https://drbennedict.tumblr.com/post/173884827251/rvancoogler-thegestianpoet-thegestianpoet

9. Yeet and repeat

Help comes in many forms.

https://bi-steverogers.tumblr.com/post/172313219560/thor-oh-we-should-do-get-help-peter-whats-get

8. Dereliction of duty

Trust fund kids. They’re all the same.

https://flange5.tumblr.com/post/167957504966/hottest-of-hot-takes-heimdall-is-literally-the

7. One more thing

Yup, that’s it that’s the vibe.

https://yawpkatsi.tumblr.com/post/172724545972/insomniac-arrest-alcoholic-with-a-heart-of-gold

6. Righteous retcon

On that subject of course corrections…

https://starshipsandmixtapes.tumblr.com/post/167730568676/i-forgot-to-mention-what-i-love-most-about

5. Friendly fire

I’d probably be Hulk.

https://swingsetindecember.tumblr.com/post/159437832652/batmanisagatewaydrug-on-a-scale-of-steve-rogers

4. Heavenly education

Wait ’till he gets to the part about comic books.

https://brieslarsons.tumblr.com/post/169134355446/marvel-wheres-my-ten-minute-video-of-thor

3. Meet the master

That’s my secret cap, I’m always confused.

https://ohthisismuchworse.tumblr.com/post/169482455885/i-almost-wish-that-thor-and-bruce-were-captured-by

2. What could have been

You gotta at least shoot this for the Bluray, I mean come on.

https://actual-jamespotter.tumblr.com/post/168229621198/i-fell-down-a-hole-of-reading-stuff-about-this

1. From the page

Finally, some screenplay excerpts for your enjoyment.

https://i-stole-a-time-lord.tumblr.com/post/170168529487/some-highlights-of-the-thor-ragnarok-script

For me, Endgame may hold the crown of best overall MCU movie forever, but this one’s in the top 5 for sure. An absolute blast.

What’s your favorite MCU flick? What’s your least favorite?

Tell us in the comments.

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Truly Bizarre Meals That Made Us Feel Very Uncomfortable

If you are squeamish or you have a weak stomach, you might want to avert your eyes from the photos below…or at least do that thing where you look through your fingers like you do when you watch a scary movie.

Because these photos are disturbing. And weird. And creepy.

No, they’re not snapshots of anything bloody or gory…they’re really bizarre meals that people threw together for some reason…and we’re really not sure why.

So take a few deep breaths, summon up your courage, and dive into these gross and disturbing meals.

Don’t say we didn’t warn you…

1. Beans on pizza?

Eat up, friends!

2. That looks disgusting.

Don’t you agree?

3. Perfect for those hot summer days!

The kids will love it!

Found this gem. from shittyfoodporn

4. Now I’m STARVING.

This will hit the spot.

Mmm a banana fish salad. from shittyfoodporn

5. It has a very nice texture to it.

Pack it and bring it to work!

The crunch factor from shittyfoodporn

6. My eyes are burning!

And so will your stomach if you try this!

I had dough left over from the pizza I made earlier but no sauce so I had to improvise, its edam tuna and turkey slices and I had it with ketchup from shittyfoodporn

7. Oreos and pickles, anyone?

The perfect combination.

8. OH MY GOD.

No way, no how.

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Sábado no sul do mundo e o receitas “NAMARIA by Sou Meliê” dessa semana vai te ajudar a fazer aquela jantinha marota pra agradar x crush nessa noite!!! Aprenda a fazer o famoso e inigualável temaki miojo! Para essa receita você vai precisar de um miojo, mortadela (é igual a mortandela, tá?!) um pacote de molho pronto e queijo ralado! Pegue uma panela, coloque água e espere ferver! Ferveu a água?! Coloque o miojo e espere 5 minutos (não fica pronto em 3 minutos nunca essa coisa)! Pegue um prato e coloque uma fatia de mortadela! Coloque o miojo em cima da mortadela, enrole fazendo um cone, coloque um pouco de molho e decore com queijo ralado! Harmonize com vinho de garrafão Carreteiro, kisuco de tutti frutti, Jamel, vodka com canela e licor de morango! Se está de dieta, harmonize com água com gás, chá de carqueja, leite quente com mel e suco de caju! Dica do Sou Meliê: cebolinha e salsicha (picados) por cima do queijo ralado para decorar essa iguaria! Tire uma foto bem bacanuda e use a #sushiman #euquefiz #jantarzinromantico e ostente!!! . . . #soumeliê #sómeliê #badinfluence #beerinstagram #beersommelier #beerinfluencer #beermeme #beer #bier #cervejaartesanal #best #bestoftheday #beeroftheday #beerlove #beercraft #bebamenosbebamelhor #cerveja #receitas #receitassaudaveis #masterchef #mestredosabor #sabado #frio #friozinho #sushi #sushilovers #temaki

A post shared by Sou Meliê de Bebidas (@sou_melie_) on

9. This will ruin any kid’s day.

Or any kid’s life, come to think of it.

10. Sweet noodles…

Get that outta here!

I just wanna pasta and candy at same time so ….I did sweet noodles from shittyfoodporn

11. Sushi and chili.

I guess there are worse things out there.

12. Pea-nut butter.

Get it?!?!

13. It didn’t have to be this way…

I’m very upset about this.

Yikes!

I hope I don’t have to actually eat any of those meals anytime soon, know what I’m saying?

Now we want to hear from you!

In the comment, tell us about some of the grossest and most bizarre meals you’ve ever had the displeasure to experience in your life.

Let’s get weird, friends!

The post Truly Bizarre Meals That Made Us Feel Very Uncomfortable appeared first on UberFacts.

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Memes That Are on the Money About Life in 2020

The economy is all over the place and things are looking pretty sketchy right about now.

I’m no expert in these matters but I propose a solution: let’s turn to a meme-based economy. Like cryptocurrencies, except not like that at all, because I honestly don’t understand how those work.

What I’m saying is let’s start treating memes like money and it’ll probably go great! Even if it doesn’t, we’ll have all these memes to laugh at, which will distract us from how not-great everything went. You can’t lose.

To give you an idea of how this would go, I’ve gathered twelve completely random memes and assigned a currency conversion calculation to let you know what I think they’re worth.

12. Mind on my money

Meme value: $1.00

Via: someecards

11. Gettin’ chipped, gotta dip

Meme value: $4.79, the retail price of a family sized bag.

Via: someecards

10. Pupper slumber

Meme value: $4 and gentle pats on the head.

Via: someecards

9. All in the phrasing

Meme value: $2 and the wisdom to know who not to screw with.

Via: someecards

8. Killing it

Meme value: the college fund your parents didn’t end up having to spend on you.

Via: someecards

7. Die laughing

Meme value: your life.

Via: someecards

6. Pain by numbers

Meme value: the price of a set of permanent markers and even more permanent emotional scarring.

Via: someecards

5. Chill pills

Meme value: $50, or a $10 copay with insurance.

Via: someecards

4. I scream

Meme value: priceless.

Via: someecards

3. Phony phone time

Meme value: dog.

Via: someecards

2. Follow your memes

Meme value: an $8 take and bake pizza.

Via: someecards

1. The grudge

Meme value: a forest worth of burn books.

Via: someecards

Some critics have claimed that my system of memes as currency “makes no sense,” and “is wildly inconsistent.” But to them I say – that’s never stopped us before.

Do you think we should replace money with memes? Why or why not?

Tell us your scholarly opinion in the comments.

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Hilarious Posts About the Many Joys of Having Kids or Something Like That

Have kids, they said…it’ll be fun, they said…were they right, though?

Well, here we are, parents, and what do you have to say for yourselves NOW?

Are you having fun? We kid, we kid…we know your kiddos are the light of your life, but still…you have to admit that they tend to drive you insane.

Especially during this pandemic when we’re all forced to be on top of each other 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Am I right, or am I right?

I think I’m right.

So why don’t you take a much-needed break, go to a quiet place, and enjoy these memes before the madness starts all over again…because we all know that it’s coming.

1. They’re not great at it.

Learn to hide better! Jeez!

Photo Credit: The Chive

2. This is who I am.

Deal with it!

Photo Credit: The Chive

3. That was incredible!

How did you do that?!?!

Photo Credit: The Chive

4. This is gonna be ugly.

Ummmm, where do I start?

Photo Credit: The Chive

5. What are you doing in here?

This room is now off limits!

Photo Credit: The Chive

6. Can I have a little space, please?

In other words, out of my face!

Photo Credit: The Chive

7. Not gonna happen!

It’s going to be a very long day.

Photo Credit: The Chive

8. Are you sure about that?

Your body language is telling me otherwise.

Photo Credit: The Chive

9. Thanks a lot, Grandma.

Now they’ll be up for three days straight.

Photo Credit: The Chive

10. I guess I’ll sleep on the floor…

You don’t have a choice.

Photo Credit: The Chive

11. Laying out their case.

Ain’t that the truth?

Photo Credit: The Chive

12. Don’t do this!

Under any circumstances!

Photo Credit: The Chive

13. Take your time…

What’s taking you so long!

Photo Credit: The Chive

14. It might be a while.

So don’t hold your breath.

Photo Credit: The Chive

Now it’s your turn.

Have your kids been driving you crazy lately? What have they been doing to get on your last nerve?

Talk to us in the comments!

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Very Funny Tweets That You May Have Missed

It can be hard to navigate Twitter sometimes.

There’s so much content flying at you from all directions that you don’t know what to focus on. But that’s where we come in!

We like to find hilarious tweets for you to enjoy so you can block out all the excess noise and zone in on the good stuff! Because if not, it’s like wandering around in the wilderness with your head up your…well, you know what I’m talking about.

And nobody wants that!

So enjoy these tweets and keep checking back for more collections of hilarity from us.

1. Keeping telling yourself that…

It does sound pretty good.

2. I see what you did there!

And I’m impressed!

3. At least you’re honest.

Old Salami Lips is back again.

4. That does not look good.

Good luck with that!

5. Cat people are pretty intense.

I’d tread carefully if I were you…

6. That’s pretty much all of us right now.

Hey, why lie about it?

7. You’re an unbearable teenager!

You know it’s the truth!

8. Not a bad life plan.

We all know about the issues with women’s pockets.

9. It’s gonna get much worse.

So buckle up…

10. Vegans…oh, boy.

Some of them can be a bit much.

11. Dad was right!

Father knows best. Always.

12. Seriously. What are they thinking?

I’d be quiet if I were you.

13. That is not a good look.

And yes, everyone is judging you.

Have you seen anything particularly funny on social media lately?

Memes? Tweets? Photos?

If so, please share them with us in the comments! Thanks!

The post Very Funny Tweets That You May Have Missed appeared first on UberFacts.

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This Fella Is Making His Neighbors Laugh With His Creative Fence Windows for Dogs

We all have to get creative right now with how we spend our spare time because everything we used to do for fun is closed for the foreseeable future.

I’m talking about concerts, sporting events, movies, etc. It’s a shame but for now, we just have to deal with it, right?

And a guy named Brian Stanley has been doing something I consider to be very worthwhile. Much to the delight of his neighbors, Stanley started The Dog Fence, which is exactly what it sounds like, but it’s a helluva lot of fun!

Stanley makes awesome, pop-culture influenced cardboard posters for his fence that also feature holes so his dogs, Burger and Ripley, can poke their heads through and make the whole neighborhood laugh!

Every few weeks, he updates the fence and shows off his artistic abilities. And it’s really a ton of fun!

Take a look at Stanley’s handiwork. We think you’ll be very impressed.

1. The Scream!

Do you recognize this painting?

2. Hey, what the ****!

You’re about to get eaten!

3. Jurassic Bark.

Doesn’t get much better than that.

4. The Dog with the Bone Earring.

This is perfect.

5. I want you!

To fill my water dish.

6. I can already hear the theme music.

It’s coming for us!

View this post on Instagram

#jaws #richarddreyfuss #thedogfence

A post shared by Burger & Ripley! (@thedogfence) on

7. Here are Ripley and Burger.

They’re having a blast!

View this post on Instagram

Burger is always smiling…

A post shared by Burger & Ripley! (@thedogfence) on

8. Weekly World News for the win!

America’s most trusted news source.

9. Behind the scenes.

He’s doing his job well.

10. A wide view of this great one.

It’s a masterpiece!

11. What will they do next?

Keep checking back to see what else they have in store for us!

What a cool project!

How have you been keeping yourself and your family busy during the pandemic and the shutdown?

Talk to us in the comments and let us know what you’ve been up to!

We can’t wait to hear from you!

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10 Tweets to Improve Your Day

For a long time, tweets were limited to just 140 characters. Then in 2017, they decided to up the limit to 280.

Interestingly though, they found that in beta testing, most people still preferred to keep the messages shorter even with more real estate allowed. Seems that the entire appeal of Twitter is in the brevity, whether that’s in the service of a pithy social statement or just a dumb joke.

Here, briefly, are ten short tweets that are definitely dumb jokes.

10. Inside out

A modern rendition of the scream.

9. Knife to meet you

Yanno, I think I could take a stab at cooking too.

8. Sleep with me

That’s not your fellow, that’s your pillow.

7. Time flies

Ah, Hollywood. Where 27 years olds are teenagers and 40 year olds are ancient.

6. Speaking my language

It’s like they say, communication is key.

5. The best part of waking up

It’s a late start, but it’s still a start, I guess?

4. Oh hi doggy

The dog will never say anything stressful or disappointing back.

3. Shelf help

You don’t have to be well read to put this one together.

2. Technically speaking

The best KIND of correct.

1. Terrible lizards

This tweet has absolutely made my day in ways I can’t even explain.

In the spirit of what makes twitter great, we’ll keep it brief and end it there. Just ten little random messages tailor-made by strangers to make us giggle. Hope that short trip has brightened your day!

Who are your favorite people on Twitter right now?

Tell us in the comments.

The post 10 Tweets to Improve Your Day appeared first on UberFacts.

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Check Out Lizzo’s Special Recipe for the Hungover Vegans Out There

Lizzo is an icon. And while she hasn’t been active on the tour scene lately, she’s definitely been active writing and making us all jealous of her poolside ways.

But despite the fact that her insta handle is @LizzoBeEating, she doesn’t tend to dedicate a ton of her online space to food content.

When she does though, it’s pretty great.

Recently, she offered up her personal solution to a big conundrum: what do you eat if you’re committed to a vegan diet, but you had a little too much to drink last night?

“Being plant based and vegan has been pretty easy,” she says in a cooking TikTok, “except for when I’m hungover. I used to crave cheesy eggs. So, here is my substitute…”

@lizzo

Might do a what I eat in a day vid because I feel like us fat queens need to represent ?

♬ original sound – lizzo

It sounds pretty good even to us omnivores. Here’s how the recipe breaks down:

1. Carne Asada and Black Bean Corn Mixture

This is the base for the recipe, she talks more about it in a previous video you can watch here.

2. JUST Egg

Add this plant-based egg substitute to the mix.

3. Season to Taste

Lizzo added some garlic powder, smoked paprika, salt, and pepper.

4. Add Spinach

Gotta get those greens in there.

5. Slice of Vegan Pepperjack

For a little spice.

6. Fry Up Some Vegan Bacon

Lizzo recommends cooking it in maple syrup so it’s “crunchy and candied.”

7. Enjoy!

Now you’re ready to chow down on what she calls “a really ugly but delicious scramble!”

A few specialty items to pick up for sure, but if you’re already stocking up for a plant-based diet, this sure looks like a recipe to try!

What’s YOUR go-to hangover meal?

Tell us in the comments.

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