I don’t think that a lot of us realized how hard it would be to truly not be able to go about our business in public for weeks on end. It’s different somehow when one CHOOSES to be alone most of the time, and quite another when you’re told you must maintain distance.
Also, not being able to see the small circle of people you’d like to is obviously different.
Luckily, we still have Twitter, and people are really busting out their best comedy in response to (another) week without interpersonal contact.
17. Are we going to forget how to friend?
Assuming we knew how to do it to begin with, of course.
When they open outside, we're going to be so weird with our friends.
— Simi (@SympLySimi) April 16, 2020
16. Is that…a pot lid?
This outfit looks like something that would protect you against Ebola.
I miss outside pic.twitter.com/Kpf14I2QCM
— Knock Star (@lilknockstar) April 12, 2020
15. The world’s best or worst luck?
You decide, A**man.
well my new license plate came in today… wish i could say i paid extra as some sort of sick joke but no. i just so happen to have the worlds worst luck. pic.twitter.com/AFdj4zkJXN
— liza (@lizardwt) April 6, 2020
14. It doesn’t even matter anymore.
Also, please do not get on a scale. That doesn’t matter right now, either.
The line between snack and meal has never in history been this blurred
— Kyle (@KylePlantEmoji) April 11, 2020
13. It’s hard to care what you look like, full stop.
Except when you’re staging a selfie, obviously.
why would I ever take the medicine in animal crossing? I don’t care what I look like to these animals
— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) April 16, 2020
12. Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally.
It’s there…just sitting there like this big dead end!
me (23 years old): im almost 30
— rat mic ? (@sliccmic) April 10, 2020
11. Salty and sweet is what makes the world go ’round.
And also snacks. Definitely.
I’ll tell you what it’s been nice to not have the “did I shut my straightener off” panic every day
— Alyssa Limperis (@alyssalimp) April 16, 2020
10. Because sleep is, for some reason, tough.
What’s happening? What did I miss?
me coming back to twitter after closing the app 10 seconds ago https://t.co/Gh6uulOOaE
— Claudius (@xclaudius) April 12, 2020
9. This is how to put social media to work FOR you.
This whole thing is making us take crushes and relationships slower and that is great.
It’s amazing how it only takes one Instagram post to make your crush on someone go away
— Whitney Cummings (@WhitneyCummings) April 16, 2020
8. It had better be where your butt is, too.
But hopefully not where the murder is happening.
Home is where the heart is. Also everything else for the foreseeable future.
— Stephen Colbert (@StephenAtHome) April 17, 2020
7. It’s a hard question to answer.
First, you have to know how you feel, and…yeah.
If anyone figures out the right answer to “how are you doing” please let me know.
— PJ Vogt (@PJVogt) April 15, 2020
6. Any girl will do.
We’re all the same, right?
— George Civeris (@georgeciveris) April 16, 2020
5. I’m sure you have some kind of skill.
How to make excellent drinks, perhaps?
Feminism taught me that I didn’t need to learn how to cook, clean, or sew to have value as a woman and now I’m like ok then what else do I have to offer my bunker?
— Nikki Glaser (@NikkiGlaser) April 12, 2020
4. Man, they had some killer nail salons back then.
But otherwise, yes, I imagine this is accurate.
Mary Magdalene seeing Jesus resurrect pic.twitter.com/qtNi33ty1S
— Evan Botkin (@EvanBotkin) April 12, 2020
3. Better check and make sure you’re not still paying for it.
god I really miss my gym that I hadn't started going to yet but totally was gonna
— Dana Donnelly (@danadonly) April 16, 2020
2. There are new rules in the world.
But still…don’t do this.
scrolling through a girl’s Instagram all the way back to the first post counts as watching a movie
— Rachel Sennott (@Rachel_Sennott) April 15, 2020
1. Honestly I am all in for this life.
But also I would like to be able to occasionally pawn my kids off on other people.
ok, so one observation i had today: everyone is turning into hobbits during quar — we’re baking breads & listening to little melodies & getting hairier & our neighborhoods are the shire & we go on our little walks through the shire & head home to our breads & plumpen our bellies
— Megan Neuringer (@MeganNeuringer) April 14, 2020
I’ve worked from home for five years and I regularly break plans just because I don’t want to go, and still…I would like this all to be over.
How are you coping? Let us know your secrets in the comments!
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