It’s time for some more hilarious tweets from moms and dads out there about the craziness of raising kids!
Because, as you know, there are never-ending stories of hilarious mishaps and insanity when you’re raising those little monsters!
Here are 15 more parenting tweets that you’ll love.
1. Not today…
5-year-old: I'm going to be so good tomorrow.
Me: What about today?
5: I have plans.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) March 1, 2020
2. Lucky you.
Being the only butt wiper you child deems acceptable is both an honor and a curse.
— Rhyming Mama (@sarabellab123) March 5, 2020
3. It’s your fault!
Me: Want anything special at the grocery store?
Child: No.
Me: Any snacks?
Child: No.
Me: Anything you want for dinners?
Child: No.
Me: Cereals?
Child: No.[1 day later]
Child [rifling through cabinets]: We never have anything to eat.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) March 1, 2020
4. I don’t want to miss anything.
My favourite thing about watching movies with my 4YO is how she talks the entire time, then asks to pause it while she pees, so she doesn’t miss anything.
— Megan Rikas (@MegsHAUSTED) March 5, 2020
5. Could go either way.
if my kids are ever called to testify against me, there are two equally likely scenerios
-they detail my crime in excruciating detail
-they incorrectly describe the plot of an episode of scooby doo— Pats A' Tweetin (@PatsATweetin) March 4, 2020
6. You are a LIAR.
“We don’t wear what we slept in out in public.”
-Me, lying to my child— AsKateWouldHaveIt (@KateWouldHaveIt) March 3, 2020
7. Mommy’s little angel.
6: Mom will you play with me?
Me: Sure buddy
6: Yay! Okay you can sit right there, you don’t even have to get up!
Me: ʸᵒᵘ’ʳᵉ ᵐʸ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳᶦᵗᵉ ᵏᶦᵈ
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) March 2, 2020
8. What gives you that idea?
Sometimes I get the feeling that my family doesn’t really care about learning my fun facts.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) March 1, 2020
9. Not quite what you imagined…
Watching the dogs lick up the kids food from the floor is the closest I get to feeling like a Disney princess
— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) March 3, 2020
10. You might be immune.
Someone asked me if I was concerned about getting the coronavirus.
“I was exposed to the germs my kids brought home from Chuck E. Cheese birthday parties. You can’t scare me.”
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) March 1, 2020
11. Just about sums it up.
My kids: [pretending to bake] Here are some cookies for you, Papa!
Me: Aw, thanks guys-
My 4 year-old: We were going to throw them in the trash because they are gross but gave them to you instead.
Me: And there it is.
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) March 2, 2020
12. That’s it right there.
If saving a half eaten piece of bologna on your knee during kid bath time doesn’t describe parenting… I don’t know what does.
— Mummy Dear
(@ThatMummyLife) March 5, 2020
13. It’s too early for this.
You know what would make parents feel more at ease about sitting in overcrowded bleachers at 7 AM on a Saturday? Blasting Eye of the Tiger.
~Youth Sports
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) March 2, 2020
14. Split personality.
Me every day: You kids drive me insane. I need a break.
Me before a kid-free trip: I CAN’T LEAVE MY LITTLE SUGAR PLUMS
— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) March 5, 2020
15. You made it!
My 5yo started calling me "your majesty" and this has been the promotion I've been waiting for.
— Stay at Homies (@stayathomies) March 3, 2020
Those are hilarious. And if you’re a parent, they probably gave you a bit of a headache!
Okay, moms and dads, let’s hear it…
In the comments, tell us the craziest/funniest/most ridiculous things your kids have done lately!
The post Funny Tweets About the Trials and Tribulations of Raising Kids appeared first on UberFacts.