Relationships take a lot of work and, sadly, many of them don’t last forever.
And when you’re in the middle of a relationship, you notice the signs that make it pretty clear the relationship has run its course and will probably fizzle out sooner than later.
It’s always a tough pill to swallow, but some things aren’t meant to last.
AskReddit users shared their thoughts about these signs that we all dread.
1. Past its expiration date.
“If you find that you can only relax and be yourself when they aren’t around, crushing you with the weight of their silent judgement and disapproval, it’s way past the expiration date.”
2. Don’t care anymore.
“When you don’t care if she leaves or not. dealing with this right now. i love her and want to be with her but she has some mental health issues that shes not willing to get help for. she threatens to leave and i just say goodbye and walk away.
Update for anyone who cares. Came home after work to her in a grumpy mood. told her to calm down or leave me alone. spent the night playing games. next morning told her she needs to get help or we aren’t lasting much longer. she has an appointment Wednesday.”
3. Ugh…that’s bad.
“When you turn the corner driving home, and feel disappointment when you see her car in the driveway – because you know the minute you step in the door she’s going to start crapping on you again.”
4. No more energy for it.
“From personal experience, the biggest indicator is when tensions should be high, you should be upset or arguing, but you just don’t care anymore.”
5. Communication breakdown.
“There is no more communication exchange.
You always feel like the next thing you say will cause another fight.”
6. Meaningless things.
“When you start fighting about a lot of meaningless things. In many cases, I’d say it’s a manifestation of the hesitation to deal with the quite harsh truth that you no longer feel that you want to be with the person.
Having to face the fact that the person you’ve been so close to, the person you’ve shaped your future with, the person you sacrificed a lot for, the person you might’ve introduced to your friends, etc, is really difficult. So it’s easier to say that your exasperation with the person is because they didn’t do.”
7. Doesn’t have to be the end.
“It doesn’t have to mean the end of a relationship. When people get accustomed to each other, they often stop noticing the good things in each other, while the small annoyances become grating.
Being aware of your attitude and making an effort to be positive, and to mention good things about your partner and complimenting them can really turn things around.
My parents started marriage counseling when the fighting became too frequent after 30 years together. It may feel silly to say things like “thank you for picking up groceries” or “you look really nice in this shirt” when you’ve seen the shirt a hundred times and you pick up groceries all the time.
But it’s those little things that make all the difference, and it’s the willingness to make the effort and change old habits that goes the distance.”
8. Here are a few…
“Several, but off the top of my head… The sight of them does nothing for you. Getting a text or phone call from them elicits an eye roll. You try to avoid them. You cannot hold a conversation with them because everything they say is irritating.
You really could not care less about their day or anything they have to say to you. You find yourself fantasizing of a life without them… and it makes you smile. You know, just to name a few.”
9. Things change…
“The nature of the relationship changes – there’s nothing as exciting as a new love, there’s nothing as comfy as an old love. Don’t confuse that change with the end of a relationship.
It’s when you just don’t want to be around them anymore that the end has come.”
10. Hiding who you are.
“When you catch yourself lying often. When you’re hiding who you are around them because you don’t want to fight or disappoint them.
Oh, and when you won’t fuck each other anymore.”
11. Not putting the work in.
“When you realize that your partner will never be willing to put in the work to make the relationship succeed.
And if when planning the future, it’s not feasible to maintain your relationship while also continuing towards your dreams and end goals.”
12. Contempt isn’t good.
“Contempt. I took a marriage and family course in college and the professor said that’s one of the biggest signs things are going to/should end. And I’ve 100% been there.”
13. That voice in your head.
“There’s a voice in your head that says “You know it’s over” …. every time my relationship has been ending I have had this happen.
Sometimes you fight it, sometimes you don’t. But the voice is always right in the end.”
14. Screen time.
“When either of you whip out your phone constantly when together.
Can’t hold a moment of comfortable silence to appreciate you both being in each other’s presence.”
15. Apathy and stubbornness.
“General apathy in my experience. From one or both sides, either can kill it.
Apathy and stubborn behavior e.g. “I don’t hurt you yet I still don’t want to be with you.
I also don’t care enough to do anything about either feeling.”
16. Some good advice to end with.
“FYI to anyone reading through this, a good portion of replies here are also totally normal occurrences in any long term relationship. There is an ebb and flow to being with someone for many years.
Some days you may want to hang out and others where you want to be left alone. Oftentimes you can go several days without having a noteworthy conversation.
Just because something like this occurs doesn’t mean your relationship is doomed. What it may mean is that you need to put some effort into sparking things back up.
I’ve had the personal experience of finding venomous spiders in my underwear drawer and it was a tell tale sign that I hadn’t taken my wife out to dance in a few weeks. After putting in a bit of effort my wife and I felt like we had just started dating. I no longer had to fear amputation of my nethers.”
Some of those are kind of painful to read because you know you’ve been there before, but that’s how relationships go sometimes.
What about you?
What are the signs from the relationships you’ve been in that things were on the downward slope?
Please share with us in the comments!
The post Men and Women Discuss the Signs That Make It Clear a Relationship Is Almost Over appeared first on UberFacts.