Parents: we support you 100%. Well, maybe not that much, but we sure appreciate your struggles and headaches.
We know some of you are barely hanging by a thread, and we’ve totally got your backs! Well, maybe not your backs. Your knees or something.
Bottom line: we’re in your corner.
Just look at these tweets.
1. That’s how it is.
My kids wanted to know what it was like to be a Mom so I asked them "WHY?" all day long until they cried & ate a whole chocolate cake.
—
Sarcastic Mommy
2. Thanks, that’s a big help.
7-year-old: I need something for school.
Me: What?
7: I don't remember.
Me: When do you need it?
7: Yesterday.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) September 10, 2019
3. Peak and off peak.
All I’m saying is parenting should be divided into peak and off peak hours, like train schedules, and off peak should pay more.
— Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) September 20, 2019
4. Don’t ever say that.
3-Month-Old: I AM VERY TIRED!
Me: Why don’t you sleep?
3-Month-Old: *eyes welling with tears* How fucking DARE YOU
— the drake gatsBOO
(@DrakeGatsby) September 17, 2019
5. Still learning the ropes.
My toddler wants to do everything by himself which is great except he’s fucking terrible at everything.
— Swishergirl (@Swishergirl24) September 12, 2019
6. Not this time…
There are few things more satisfying than when I lock the bathroom door and then hear my kids unsuccessfully twist the knob trying to barge in like, “Not this time, suckas. Not this time.”
— SpacedMom (@copymama) September 18, 2019
7. Figure that one out.
It may be passive aggressive but if my kid wakes me up one more Sunday before 5 AM, I’m taking the straw off her juice box when I pack her lunch.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) September 12, 2019
8. That’s my boy!
My son’s kindergarten teacher apparently played “what is your favourite body part” with the class today.
Most kids chose their nose. Their eyes. Their ears. Their hair.
My son chose his penis.
I only know this because his kindergarten teacher confessed that it made her year.
— Goldfish and Chicken Nuggets (@gfishandnuggets) September 14, 2019
9. Wrong cup, moron!
Toddler: *crawling across the desert*
Kind stranger: *offers water*
Toddler: No, red cup!
— Dude-Bro Dad (@thedadvocate01) September 17, 2019
10. All of the above.
Ways to piss off your child. Feed them. Bathe them. Clothe them. Breathe.
—
Mommy Curses
11. Doesn’t work that way.
You can’t take your kids somewhere, spend money on them, and expect them to have a good time. That’s not how it works.
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) August 1, 2019
12. They clearly prefer mommy.
me: *does anything*
my 4yo: [appearing out of nowhere] ok but that’s not how mommy does it
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) June 30, 2019
13. They’ll never find me here.
I’m convinced the old lady who lived in a shoe only did it because she knew that was the one place her kids would never be able to find her.
— MomTransparenting (@momtransparent1) September 3, 2019
14. A whole different level.
You think you don’t GAF and then your toddler stares you down while shitting in his pants and you realize what not GAF really is.
— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) September 7, 2019
15. Perfect little angels, aren’t they?
While it’s impossible to pick a favorite child, it’s easy to identify the one who isn’t your favorite at the moment.
— The Dad Briefs
(@SladeWentworth) September 20, 2019
Hang in there, moms and dads! You’re doing just fine!
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