Excellent Tweets To Laugh At Anytime

Do you know what time it is! No cheating! No looking at clocks! No checking sundials! No pressing your ear to the earth to become one with its rotation and vibrations, so fully integrating your soul into that of nature that you sense time on a level not felt by our petty societal concerns! None of that!

Give up? It’s Twitter time! See, if you’d been able to look at a clock, it would have told you that.

Sorry, I’m not sure what I’m talking about today. I’m just so excited to look at some funny tweets. Let’s hurry up and do that before I say more nonsense.

10. Fork you

The question is: did you tell her yes?

9. Rest in Greece

That’s a marketing idea you could have sold instead of giving out for free.

8. Just one thing

Or don’t, that’s fine too.

7. Regression jam

Aaaand now I’m doing the very same thing.

6. History in the making

I could use a full book of facts like these.

5. Working it out

Yeah, thanks for that.

4. Pressing pause

I can see the cogs turning behind your eyes.

3. At least I tried

I might have accidentally just made bread.

2. Picture this

Everybody needs to leave this poor man alone, he’s just vibing.

1. A lesson in tolerance

It only gets truer with every year that passes.

And now Twitter time is over. But fear not – it shall strike again soon. When you least expect it.

Who are your favorite people to follow on Twitter?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Excellent Tweets To Laugh At Anytime appeared first on UberFacts.

Ladies Share the Best Things to Say to Them in Bed

We’ve all heard painful stories (or even experienced them first hand) of saying the wrong thing in bed and totally killing the mood.

How do we avoid such things?

Reddit has some insights.

What do girls want guys to say during sex? from AskReddit

Let’s see if we can’t pick up a few tips.

1. Just play.

Once, I let my boyfriend just play with my boobs for as long as he liked.

I was surprised how long he wanted to just lie there and play with them – maybe 45 minutes?

It was so sweet and funny when he said, totally serious, “this is like a dream come true.” I’ll always remember that.

– aimeed72

2. Holy smokes.

I’m not typically into talking during sex (me or my partner) but I once had a dude tell me I was a goddess while I was on top of him.

Instant confidence boost, felt 10,000% sexier.

– Nikkomus

3. Vocalize.

Words aren’t necessary but if you’re feeling pleased do vocalize it. Silence or just looking at me is odd. I want feedback.

Say what feels good, if you want me to do something or stop doing something. Moan, groan, swearing (i know it’s not just me who loves it when they’re so turned on the whisper ‘f*ck’. Makes me feel very confident). Communication is a turn on. Say our names will make us crazy.

– IDontHave20Letters

4. Say something nice.

Some compliments are nice. Complimenting my body like “wow you look so sexy” or “your breasts look so good right now” Or complimenting my skills like “you sure know how to suck a d*ck” or “mm you are so good at riding me”

Also I love when a guy asks “ does that feel good” or “do you like having my c*ck inside you”

Also I love when a guy tells me before he is going to finish so I know, like “you’re about to make me c*m babe”

– Excellent-Raccoon-32

5. The classics.

“you’re so f*cking tight” and I like when a guy’s eyes roll back and their knees get weak when they c*m.

I think it’s hot as f*ck. I think I care more about the actions they do over verbal though.

– shinywatersoul

6. Let me know.

Nothing particular. I just want to know if my partner is really enjoying that. I absolutely hate it when men are so silent during sex that I can even barely hear their breathing. Moaning is super hot. Doesn’t have to be super loud porn moaning, but some ohs, ahs and mmhms are strongly appreciated. And obviously I want him to tell me if he is uncomfortable/in pain/cold/I am bending his d*ck to a wrong direction too much/he wants to change position.

Some compliments are also good but it’s super important to make your girl feel SPECIAL so AVOID saying things like “I love how girls bite their lip like that, it’s so sexy”. “I love how YOU bite your lip like that”. And typical stuff like “You’re so hot” are totally okay.

– -acidlean-

7. A teachable moment.

Instruct me like it’s my first time.

I want to know exactly what you want.

– MayUrSh*tsHavAntlers

8. Testing the waters.

I think the most important thing is that you try it out with your partner.

I (m) was quiet in the early days of my relationship of almost 6 years now. And she asked me why I didn’t moan, I said I didn’t know. I tried it the next time. To an extent I would be comfortable with and she was loving it. So I did it more and more and we found out she basically just likes when I talk dirty to her when we do it.

I little time ago she said she wanted me to be a little more dominant in the words I say. So I tried. I called her something, she didn’t like it, so she told me and we came to terms on a different word I could try instead. Also I might be that you only like something when you are really turned on. So just jumping in at the deep end is not a good idea. Get warmed up first.

It’s all about going at a pace where both parties are comfortable and then only when both are comfortable THEN you can try to push those boundaries. Tell what each of you liked and what you disliked.

– Claptrap_Ninja

9. What’s the vibe?

It depends on the mood of the sex.

Lovey? “I love you sooooo much” with a lot of emotion in it goes pretty far. Or a breathless “you’re beautiful”

Kinky roleplay? (I am the sub): “You’re just my little f*cktoy and I can do whatever I want to you.” or the equivalent but shorter “you’re mine”

Either case or just regular vanilla sex? “It feels so good inside you”, “god I love your…” (insert body part here)

And yes, moans, heavy breathing, grunts, anything to let me know you’re enjoying yourself.

– allergic2Luxembourg

10. Keeping busy.

I expect their tongue to be too busy for much speech for a good portion of the time.

– Dragoness42

11. Vroom vroom!

I know for sure its not car noises.

– Warkitz

12. The hottest of all.

“I’m three months ahead on the mortgage…we can take that vacation to Tuscany.”

– plague681

13. Oops.

The right name usually helps.

– Diplodocus114

14. Wait.

“I cleaned the bathroom and took care of the dishes.”

– Sgarden91

15. Ok, that’s enough.

Softly whisper the lyrics to cotton eyed joe

– Sammi2005-2019

Just gonna jot a few of these down. Might be awkward when I flip open my notepad in the middle of the action, though.

What do you like to hear in bed?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Ladies Share the Best Things to Say to Them in Bed appeared first on UberFacts.

Things That Gen Z Would Very Much Like Millennials to Know

It’s been fun being a millennial. Just a great ride. Nothing but stable a world and steady prospects and a lot of fun all-around.

I’d say the best part was spending the first 25 years or so of my life hearing the older generation tell me everything that’s wrong with me, and then to spend all the years since listening to the younger generation tell me a whole new set of reasons I suck. Really great. Very cool. A lot of fun.

Gather round, millennials. Let’s find out what we’re doing wrong.

10. Burritos

But only if they’re cold in the middle, because life is disappointment.

9. It’s in the stars

Ok this criticism I’m on board with, very tired of this.

8. ‘Tis the season

Turn the bagel itself into a seasoning and then we’ll talk.

7. What’s shakin’?

Tell that to a dog. Yeah, that’s right, you just insulted dogs. Happy with yourself?

6. Millennial pink

I don’t…I don’t even know what this means.

5. ‘Till death

I mean, being happily married kind of is. Do you know how many of us came up in divorce?

4. Tautologies

I think, therefore I am.

3. Self-burn

Wow, turning yourself in like that. Bold.

2. Watch out

Netflix isn’t so much a personality trait as a survival mechanism now.

1. The real truth

But punch away, kids.

In all seriousness, I’m not actually that salty. Have fun with jabs while they last, Gen Z. Your turn to feel old and irrelevant is coming soon enough.

And keep making astrology uncool. It would be super neat to be done with that.

Are you a millennial? How do you feel about it?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Things That Gen Z Would Very Much Like Millennials to Know appeared first on UberFacts.

People Talk About the Statement, “Sleeping in Your Car Should Be Legal, and Not Looked Down Upon”

I’ve never actually lived in my car, but I’ve had a few nights when sleeping in my car was the best or the only option and I snoozed the night away in the backseat on a side street somewhere.

Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do…

So why is there such a stigma around sleeping in our vehicles?

AskReddit users discussed whether sleeping in your car should be legal and shouldn’t be looked down upon.

Let’s see what they had to say.

1. Your decision.

“To me it makes no sense that you can’t legally sleep in your car in certain places. Like sure if you’re on someone else’s property you should find a better spot.

But there are whole cities where it is flat out illegal to sleep in your car on public property overnight. You own your car, it should be your decision if you can sleep in it.”

2. Agreed.

“It’s liability issues, but I agree with you.

If I was traveling around the country I’d hate to have to pay for a bunch of hotels when I could just chill in my car for a couple nights.”

3. You can make it work.

“You just have to have the right car, correctly set up. If they can’t see or hear you in the back of your vehicle, and if they have no reason to believe the vehicle is occupied, you’re golden.

I’ve done this with a cargo trailer that I set up inside as a camper with a bed, fridge, microwave, etc. Also, car camped for a while with a Honda Element that I put curtains over the windows. A panel van would work well too.”

4. From someone who’s been there.

“I slept in my car for 5 months.

I also had a job delivering sandwiches so it worked out. I usually slept in Walmart parking lots and never got bothered unless i parked literally anywhere else. Ive never had more run ins with the cops than when i lived out of my car, but on the flipside, they were all very understanding and never wrote me any tickets.

Living out of your car is very scary at first, but you get used to it and it is very eye opening/ enlightening. You get an outsiders perspective of the rat race. Everyone around you is in busy mode, chasing the next dollar just so they can afford a place to put a mattress.

In the city, sleeping is the only thing you’re not aloud to do anywhere else besides a home. You can literally do everything else you need to do to get by.

Living in your car gives you this sense of freedom that you’ll never get anywhere else besides an RV i suppose and even then, i would imagine you could get stuck in bed like you do at home. When you wake up from sleeping in your car, you’re up and ready to take on the day.

There is no sleeping in really because when you wake up you have to find the nearest bathroom before you sh*t your pants. The cleanest bathrooms that you can go in without looking weird because youre not buying anything are at the dollar tree. But they open at like 9am so i would always have to use Walmarts when i woke up. I will say, thunderstorms are pretty f*cking scary when you live in your car.

Every storm feels like a f*cking tornado is about to blow you away. But yeah. There are a lot more people who live out of their cars than you think.”

5. Might be true.

“I’m convinced the money hotels make from sleeping in a car being illegal is a contributing factor to why it’s still illegal.

Also, the general hatred of poor and homeless people in this country.”

6. Can be sketchy.

“Truck stops can be safer but it depends on where you are at.

Theres no way in hell id sleep at the TA truck stop off I 95 near New Jersey nor the one in Baltimore. Hell most of the truck stops whether they’re part of the Big 5 (Loves, Travel Centers of America (TA), Pilot, Flying J and Petro) or not, i wouldn’t stay at in the north east at all.

They’re incredibly unsafe, most are dirty and if you attempt to camp out via an RV or even just a tent and your car, you’re likely to have some very unwelcome attention from not just the truckers but also the truck stop employees and locals….. Most truck stops now will absolutely boot or tow your car/pickup if you are parked there for more than one or two overnight visits.

As for parking at Walmarts… No. Absolutely not. You cannot park, camp or stay overnight in Walmarts any longer due to the issues that are brought about by such things… Namely idiots leaving trash, dead food out in the parking lot, people using the parking lot as a bathroom, abandoning pets and just trashing the place for no reason (since there are trash cans everywhere).

Most Walmarts that allow you to camp out or even sleep in your vehicle on their property are very few and far between. Even asking management before you head to bed won’t do any good if theres a city ordinance that says no camping… Since 95% of Walmarts lease their land from the cities they operate in.

I was a trucker for 7yrs.”

7. I feel this comment.

“I’ve watched too many horror movies and documentaries to sleep in my car on the side of the road.

Like I’m legit afraid some hillbilly might kill me.”

8. I don’t think that would fly here.

“Apparently in a lot of Scandinavia they have “wanderer’s laws” or something that allow you to camp and forage on even private property in most cases.

Kind of an interesting concept.”

9. Shouldn’t be an issue.

“Honestly, it shouldn’t be an issue, so long as it’s limited to one or two night stay within a certain area, within a certain period of time (say per acre/per week).

And you must be low impact unless otherwise stated (no fire, no garbage left behind, no destruction of the property). Sadly, it only takes a few to ruin it for everyone else.”

10. Not in my backyard.

“I don’t want homeless people sleeping in front of my house.

I want my tax dollars to provide safe and adequate solutions for people.”

11. No winners here.

“This was actually a big thing where I grew up.

It was a very safe, upper middle class area with very little crime to pursue. Police spent a lot of their energy trying to hand out DUIs, but also fined people for sleeping in cars or leaving their car overnight.

It created a no-win scenario of either driving illegally or parking illegally.”

12. All about money.

“This is the reason right here. So many laws exist to force you to have to spend money on things.

“What you found a way to live that doesn’t force you to rely on consumerism and capitalism and doing work for you that makes you money that pays me less than I’m worth? To buy goods and services and products I don’t actually need and could find ways to do without paying?

We can’t have that!””

13. One night only.

“There are tons of places in the US where you can, but most only allow you to stay for a night.

Cracker Barrel, Walmart, Home Depot, etc., you just have to check for signs prohibiting overnight stays. I’ve parked my RV overnight in all of those places. Rest stops as well.

In smaller cities without big box stores, simply asking the local police if its OK always worked, especially when I mentioned getting a little too tired to drive.”

How do you feel about this?

Should people be able to sleep in their cars legally and without judgment?

Tell us what you think in the comments. Thanks in advance!

The post People Talk About the Statement, “Sleeping in Your Car Should Be Legal, and Not Looked Down Upon” appeared first on UberFacts.

People Discuss the Ways You Can Use a “Finstagram” Account Today

Do you know about “finstagram?” It’s not exactly a new term – it’s been floating around for a few years. But its connotations and implications certainly seem to have shifted around and expanded.

At its most basic root, a finstagram is just a secondary Instagram account. People open them for all kinds of reasons, ranging from privacy to sneakiness to all kinds of other shenanigans.

Here are ten ideas for how you (or…someone naughtier than you) mind use a finstagram account.

10. To be super extra

Why would you get mad about being left out of this?

Source: Whisper

9. “Being a hoe”

This…takes a lot of turns I was not prepared for.

Source: Whisper

8. Making your ex jealous

Was this the plan all along?

Source: Whisper

7. Drop some hints

Maybe it’s time to be a little more straight forward.

Source: Whisper

6. F*** the police

I think at this point that’s the sort of thing that’s gonna be pretty tough and needless to prosecute.

Source: Whisper

5. Scare your crush

Whoa dude, what did you do?

Source: Whisper

4. Get into drama

Anywhere on the internet is pretty good for that.

Source: Whisper

3. Hide from your parents

Darn those sneaky kids and their tech savvy ways.

Source: Whisper

2. Express yourself

Back in my day we just called this a diary.

Source: Whisper

1. Improve your life!

Somehow! Maybe!

Source: Whisper

And now that you’ve heard its many uses, do you think you’ll get a finstagram? Considering I never even use my regular account, I’m probably gonna pass.

Have you had experiences with finsta?

Tell us about them in the comments.

The post People Discuss the Ways You Can Use a “Finstagram” Account Today appeared first on UberFacts.

Things that Are NOT Personality Traits, so STOP IT Millennials

Some people say that Twitter is worthless, but I don’t think so…

As a Millennial, one invaluable service that I can rely on Twitter to deliver is giving me an endless and comprehensive list of what I should NOT consider to be a personality trait.

I gather these carefully, print them out on my dot-matrix, and compile them into a sort of vision board to help me focus. Or at least I did, until I was informed that having a vision board was not a personality trait, and subsequently burned it in ritualistic fire.

Here are some more things to avoid, lest ye be basic.

10. TikTok hate

It’s gonna be fascinating to see a whole generation of people mortified by their old TikToks once they hit their late 20’s.

9. Mix it up

At least we’re not still putting them on CD’s.

8. The most magical place

When we left childhood only to find that the adulthood promised us was desolate and dead.

7. Every single time

VCR stands for “Very Cool Rad.”

6. What’s cookin’

We were instilled at a young age with a fear of sexy vampires.

5. Mondays

TIL all millennials are living in a Garfield cartoon.

4. Toast to me

It’s true, we chose it over home ownership.

3. You oughta know

That’s not true, for some of us it’s Parks & Rec.

2. The buffet

Please ask permission before you quote me directly.

1. See the world

I get the sense this tweet is supposed to make me feel bad, but from what angle exactly I’m not sure.

So, there you have it. Things that are not personality traits. Do with that information what you will.

Are you a millennial? How do you feel about it?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Things that Are NOT Personality Traits, so STOP IT Millennials appeared first on UberFacts.

What is Finstagram? These 10 Folks Tell Us.

Even though it’s a term that’s been around for a while now, it’s taken some people (like um…me) this long to even catch onto what a “finstagram” is.

If you’re still wondering, it’s pretty simple. A “finstagram” account is just an Instagram account, except secretive. Either you keep it anonymous, or only give access to your closest friends. It’s a place where you can be stealthy or ridiculous without fear of larger social repercussions.

If you wanna know more, here are a few testimonials from the kids.

10. Hot pics

Gotta find just the right way to really explore me.

Source: Whisper

9. Sexy finsta

Found out your secret.

Source: Whisper

8. I see you

I think this kind of defeats the purpose.

Source: Whisper

7. Freedom

Sounds like it can be pretty liberating.

Source: Whisper

6. First person

These are the things you might want to keep track of.

Source: Whisper

5. The following

We’ve turned into an entire society of creeps.

Source: Whisper

4. The best

Really? THE BEST?!

Source: Whisper

3. Late night

You know what they say: timing is everything.

Source: Whisper

2. For clarification

This will all be on the test, so pay attention.

Source: Whisper

1. Disrespectful

When your fans become your congregation.

Source: Whisper

I’m still not entirely sure I understand the dynamics of finstagram, but that’s ok, I don’t think it’s a world that’s meant for me.

Have you played around with it? What was your experience? What sorts of things did you use it for?

Tell us all about it in the comments.

The post What is Finstagram? These 10 Folks Tell Us. appeared first on UberFacts.

Confessions From People Who Fantasize About Their Friends

A close friendship is one of the greatest things a person can have. But what happens when the boundaries of that friendship start to slip and slide and become a little less clear?

Or what happens when that’s what you find yourself WANTING in your head.

When the person you hang out with becomes the person you desire, the dynamic can change quite a bit. Do you risk it all and go after it? Do you play it safe and keep what you have? How can you keep going? Will these feelings pass or just grow?

These are the things doubtlessly rattling around in the heads of the people who wrote these confessions.

10. Face facts

I mean, one dream doesn’t necessarily mean much.

Source: Whisper

9. Owned

Well that is a very specific dynamic you’re wanting.

Source: Whisper

8. Well, now he knows

Doesn’t sound like you’re trying very hard to keep it from him.

Source: Whisper

7. What do you want

Seems like he’s maybe not sure what he wants either.

Source: Whisper

6. The other side

Why not both?

Source: Whisper

5. Dark fantasies

How dark are we talkin’ here?

Source: Whisper

4. Make a move

Are you afraid of what might happen?

Source: Whisper

3. When you’re around

Dang confusing feelings.

Source: Whisper

2. Hold on

Or maybe he IS getting that sense…

Source: Whisper

1. Even if…

The addiction is real.

Source: Whisper

To all the hopelessly crushing out there, we’re with you. Do what you gotta do.

Have you ever been in a situation like this? What was it like?

Tell us about it in the comments.

The post Confessions From People Who Fantasize About Their Friends appeared first on UberFacts.

Cruel Secrets People Overheard From People They Thought Were Their Friends

It’s always disappointing to hear something from someone you thought was a friend that seems to betray that notion.

It can also be severely troubling to just discover something about a friend that you weren’t supposed to know. How do you deal with that? What do you do? Are the dynamics that defined the relationship up until now just broken or is there opportunity to turn this into something more positive?

That’s the sort of question that the people behind these real confessions were grappling with.

10. It was nothing

It can be so difficult to know what truly lies beneath.

Source: Whisper

9. Unavailable

Well, make up your mind then.

Source: Whisper

8. They were my bros

I’ll never understand why this kind of trash talk takes off.

Source: Whisper

7. Is it me?

The sort of thing that breeds deep insecurity that’s hard to be rid of.

Source: Whisper

6. Coming out

Sounds like you need to make a new group of friends.

Source: Whisper

5. A thing for me

What exactly does one do with such information?

Source: Whisper

4. What do I do

Why would you enter into such a conspiracy?

Source: Whisper

3. Sucks at talking

To be fair, so do I.

Source: Whisper

2. Into me

Well, what’s to get?

Source: Whisper

1. My so called friend

Seems like it’s only a matter of time before somebody will need to call the cops on that guy.

Source: Whisper

Tough all around. Remember that a toxic friendship isn’t one worth holding onto, there are better things out there.

Have you had an experience like this?

Tell us about it in the comments.

The post Cruel Secrets People Overheard From People They Thought Were Their Friends appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share the Dumbest Things Folks Have Ever Confidently Said To Them

As you get a little bit older, you really pick up on one important thing about the world…there sure are a lot of DUMMIES out there!

You know what I’m talking about, right?!?!

And it also doesn’t really help that we currently live at a time when people don’t believe in facts and everyone thinks they’re right about everything.

Oh, boy…

AskReddit users shared really dumb things that people have said to them with confidence.

This should be interesting…

1. Beware of vampires.

“You can only get Covid-19 if you get bitten by someone who had it.”

2. Timezones.

“How can it be 9 AM here (Toronto) and 6 AM in Vancouver, at the same time?” – a work colleague, years ago. I tried to explain it but it didn’t work.

I remember that she was a very sweet and kindhearted lady and she really could not understand it.

I think she lacked some basic knowledge so the concept of timezones was too advanced for her.”

3. A well-known fact.

“There was a guy I knew from the UAE in college with me.

We were talking about track and field for some reason and he blurts out “Ya, women shouldn’t be running so fast because their ovaries will burst”.

He was absolutely serious and insisted this is a well known fact taught in high school biology.”

4. Let’s consult the map.

“‘Amsterdam is a city in London’.

I couldn’t even begin to explain how wrong she was.”

5. You idiot!

“Totally looked me in the eyes and yelled that all I do is sit on my *ss and that I should go get a job.

I’m in a f*cking wheelchair.

True story!!!”

6. Ouch.

“I worked at CVS and this woman was buying a 6 pack of Smart Water.

She asked me if it would make her smarter and when I said no she asked to speak with a manager?”

7. I think you’re right.

“I had a co-worker, 45 year old white dude from interior Saskatchewan argue with me that the Chinese phrase he heard that one time was absolutely correct and that I just didnt know it.

I am Chinese, born in China and speak fluent Mandarin and Cantonese.”

8. One of those folks…

“That dinosaur bones are manmade by scientists to convince us there is no God.”

9. It’s also a country…

“I was asked what country I’m from and I replied Georgia.

The person then said “oh, honey that’s a state. That’s not a country”…”

10. This is amazing.

“My friends wife believed me when I told her La Quinta means “behind Denny’s”.

He told me later she argued with her sister about it.”

11. Clearly a genius.

“I was talking to a girl on vacation and when we got to “what do you do for work?” I said I worked in my parents’ hog farm.

She, with a disgusted face said, “Why Don’t You Get Your Meat Ethically From The Store Like Everybody Else!?”

I was too dumbfounded to even carry on with that conversation and it ended almost right away”

12. You think so?

“A super Conservative buddy of mine…

We had a debate about global warming, green energy and using oil/fossil fuels for energy. I pointed out that regardless of how you feel about fossil fuels, we would have to eventually move on to something else because theres a limit to using oil and sh*t.

He said in a drunken stooper..”WE”RE GONNA FIND OIL ON THE MOON AND MARS!”

I told him the conversation was over after that since he didn’t understand where the f*ck oil came from..I still f*ck with him about it once in a while.”

13. A beautiful country.

“From someone doing a presentation in front of our class: Norwegians are from Norwegia.”

Hmmmm…not too bright…

Now we want to hear from you.

In the comments, tell us about the dumbest thing that someone has said to you with confidence.

We can’t wait to hear from you!

The post People Share the Dumbest Things Folks Have Ever Confidently Said To Them appeared first on UberFacts.