Kids Who Have No Idea What Their Parents Do for a Living

I recall a story my parents used to tell about my sister; she was asked in school what her dad did for a living and she replied “he sits at his desk and reads his newspaper.”

Kids don’t actually know how the world works, so it makes sense that the nuance of our jobs outside the home are mostly lost on them.

Which is probably why these 11 tots only thought they knew what their parents did for a living.

11. Did she, though?

I’m sure she did sometimes.

10. I’m sure that’s part of it.

But there’s a lot more. Probably.

9. Yeah that’s not the same thing.

It is funny, though.

8. Uh-oh. Someone’s getting called into the boss’s office.

Kids, man. You can’t trust them.

7. Seems like a good gig if you can get it.

I’m not sure they pay you for that, though.

6. To a little boy, that probably seems cooler.

Super awkward at parent-teacher conferences, though.

5. Sometimes they’re using it to their advantage.

Smart little boogers.

4. Where’s the lie, though?

It’s all semantics.

3. If it’s the only thing you remember, it must be the only thing that happened.

Kid logic.

2. That escalated quickly.

“Something to do with chemicals” was in her head.

1. Somebody watches too many movies.

I approve.

I am dying, y’all. Kids are just the best.

Do you have a funny story like this? Share it with us in the comments!

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Parents of Girls, These Memes Are for You!

There are tons of things that apply to anyone raising a child of any gender or orientation, but there are also things that apply only to certain situations.

And for those who gave birth to females who still identify as girls, you just might recognize the truth in these 12 memes.

12. Where would be the fun in that?

No fun.

Image Credit: Someecards

11. Basically.

And just as fun.

Image Credit: Someecards

10. That’s one reason, anyway.

There are so many to choose from.

Image Credit: Someecards

9. It changes every day.

You always have a different favorite.

Image Credit: Someecards

8. Just what your mom wished for.

Santa Clause delivered.

Image Credit: Someecards

7. You’re proud and fed up all at once.

Welcome to motherhood.

Image Credit: Someecards

6. One of many jobs.

She takes it very seriously.

Image Credit: Someecards

5. I say this all the time.

It never really works.

Image Credit: Someecards

4. It’s important to limber up.

Complaining is part of the job.

Image Credit: Someecards

3. What is money?

They have no idea.

Image Credit: Someecards

2. That’s when you know you’re in trouble.

If you didn’t already realize.

Image Credit: Someecards

1. Better have two.

It’s been a long year.

Image Credit: Someecards

I have boys, and I’m happy about that more days than it makes me sad.

Because while I may have to deal with a bunch of dirty underwear and socks, I won’t have to deal with a 13-year-old girl hating me. Which is nice.

If you’ve got a daughter, tell us how true these ring for you!

Please and thank you!

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Enjoy This Giant Game of Jenga – Complete With Hidden Jell-O Shots – At Your Next Party

We’re always looking for new ways to turn games we enjoy into a game we can play while also drinking, and I don’t know about you, but a giant Jenga game that comes with Jell-O shots sounds pretty darn intriguing.

Except for the Jell-O part, but I suspect you could replace them with any sort of shot you prefer.

Tipsy Topple’s version of Jenga stands 2.7 feet tall, with individual blocks that are 9 by 3 by 1.8 inches. There are 56 of them, and 6 contain a single hole where you can place shot, and 6 more contain two holes for double the fun.

Image Credit: Etsy

I suppose the Jell-O comes in handy because it doesn’t spill. I get it now.

To play, you’ll need 18 Jell-O shots in 2-ounce cups with lids (just ask your college self where to buy them).

You put them into the slots, build your 18-story tower, and then set your rules.

Image Credit: Etsy

Tispy Topple recommends either the player who pulls the block taking the shot(s) or the player who successfully pulls the block getting to assign the shots to another player.

Be careful with that second one, because it seems like targeting a person could happen, and could definitely get ugly.

Image Credit: Etsy

The loser is obviously the person who topples the tower, just like in regular Jenga, and this one comes with a handy plastic bag to pack everything up in afterward.

It sounds perfect for all of your outdoor summer hijinks, and you could even buy a second one for the kids and fill it with cups of plain Jell-O.

Just don’t mix them up, though. That would be bad.

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Kids Gave Totally Hilarious Explanations for What Their Parents Do for a Living

Our parents’ existence outside of our home lives is super confusing when we’re young.

Like, we know they go somewhere while we’re at school or daycare. We might even know where, and that they make money there or whatever, but honestly, kids are too wrapped up thinking about Nerf guns and the Tooth Fairy and the next time they’re going to get candy to really pay attention to what their parents are on about.

Which is probably how these 10 wrong – but funny – explanations for what their parents do for a living came to be.

Let’s take a look!

10. So not too far off.

Neither is interesting enough to impress kids.

9. Definitely something true in there.

I’m not sure which part.

8. I bet he loved that.

I hope he was a confident man.

7. They sort of sound the same.

I’m on the kid’s side, here.

6. That might be what she does, but it’s not what she does.

Or is it?

5. I mean, she does.

She just also sells them.

4. Sometimes we don’t even know where their heads are.

To be fair, neither do they.

3. That probably seemed like the best job ever.

I know I would like it.

Image Credit: Twitter

 

2. I bet she secretly loved that.

I know I would.

1. Kind of like a pirate.

Talk about a dream job.

Kids are just awesome, don’t you think?

Share your funny story along these lines down in the comments!

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Women With Hilarious Takes on Marriage

Marriage can be tough. Anyone who tells you differently is definitely selling something – whether to themselves, you, or both.

One of the best ways to survive the years and months (sometimes the hours) is to maintain a sense of humor. If you’re struggling with that today, these 13 women have your back.

13. He’s done it now.

He’s gonna regret that nerd stuff.

12. I cannot stress enough how important this is.

Otherwise, murder shall ensue. Or divorce.

11. He might dispute the “fun” part.

Though he didn’t specify for who.

10. I mean, sometimes the nap just happens.

But not all the time.

9. That’s why you have to take so many selfies.

They do it to themselves.

8. I don’t understand why they can’t charge their phones.

Is it an elaborate plan to avoid talking?

7. Or at the very least, you don’t see the brie.

Just tell her she looks beautiful and can she turn off the light when she’s done.

6. You don’t want to see yourself how they see you.

Not through your phone camera, anyway.

5. There are worse things.

Especially if there are wings.

4. The smart husbands know this.

It goes off in their head like a bullhorn.

3. The answer stands.

The internet is forever, my man.

2. And possibly offer to fix the dryer.

If you want to go the extra mile.

1. I’ll buy it.

Because I’ve heard it alllll the way in the city.

Thank goodness for laughter, y’all. That’s all I have to say.

How do you keep laughing? Tell us your own secrets in the comments!

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A Mom Realized She Sent Daughter to Picture Day in an Very Inappropriate Shirt

We’re all trying our best here. Some days, that’s good enough. Everyone is happy and life feels right and amazing.

Other days we’re exhausted and it’s honestly enough if the entire family makes it through safe and fed – happy and together can wait for another day.

Image Credit: TikTok

I’m thinking the mom in this TikTok video must have been having one of the latter sort of experiences when she chose a funny t-shirt for her toddler daughter from the closet. A gift from a friend, it read “Sasshole,” because her daughter Emma was infamous for her attitude.

Image Credit: TikTok

Her mother, Paige Ward of Oklahoma, had just finished a 60-hour work week, was struggling with the pandemic (as so many of us are), and didn’t even really notice what shirt she had put on Emma that morning.

Then, her daughter came home with their school pictures.

Image Credit: TikTok

The lettering on the shirt was cut off, and proclaimed her daughter “A$shole” for all eternity.

In the end, Paige decided there was nothing to do but laugh.

@paigepuhlease

#greenscreenvideo Well.. should I order some prints or what.. #badmom #sass #toddlersoftiktok #fyp #viral

♬ Oh No – Kreepa

Other parents on TikTok definitely agreed with her, too, pointing out that her daughter was probably about to become a meme.

Image Credit: TikTok

And saying they hoped she’d ordered a whole packet of prints.

Image Credit: TikTok

They pointed out that perhaps this wasn’t a fail at all, but a win.

Image Credit: TikTok

Everything in life is about perspective, and that goes double (or triple) for parenting.

I say laugh, keep the prints to put in her high school yearbook, and move on.

We all have more important stuff to worry about, don’t you think?

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Parents Who Blessed Us With Their Kids’ Funniest Moments

I know there’s a big discussion in the parenting world about social media and privacy, and how much to share of your child’s life and likeness before they’re officially old enough to consent.

That said, quoting your kid in a post seems pretty harmless, since no names are used and probably you don’t even have that many followers (do you?).

Maybe I’m just trying to justify it because I really don’t want parents like these 10 to stop amusing me with the hijinks that happen behind closed doors – for today, let’s just enjoy!

10. It’s a fun game we like to play.

All those years of playing Carmen Sandiego are about to pay off.

9. Also the answer to “what’s that smell.”

Or it could be the dog, but that’s basically the same thing.

8. And honestly, we’re grateful.

Otherwise, who knows how we would be living?

7. One way or another.

God help them if they eat the fruit before you get around to it.

6. Kids say the sweetest things.

And also things like this.

5. Everyone lies.

It the new “how often do you floss.”

4. Musical instruments are a double-edged sword.

They’re also why noise-canceling headphones exist.

3. We’ve got to get our giggles somehow.

That’s why we had kids!

2. Bless her heart.

She’s gonna have to find someone who can live with that one day.

1. This is very sweet.

And I’m actually glad the drawing isn’t more realistic and detailed.

One of the best things about kids – and the thing that keeps them alive some days – is how they make us laugh.

What’s the last thing your kid said or did that you just had to share? Tell us about it in the comments!

The post Parents Who Blessed Us With Their Kids’ Funniest Moments appeared first on UberFacts.

Kids Who Absolutely Totally Nailed Their School Pictures

When you’re a parent, you want to have adorable photos that will let you remember the glow of your kid’s childhood once they’re older and crabby and stuff.

Unfortunately, the school photographers can only do so much, and kids have their own agenda (if and when they even realize there is one to be had), and honestly, sometimes humor is better than cute, right?

At least, I hope that’s the attitude these 20 parents managed to find when these school pictures found their way home.

20. He took that freedom and ran with it.

Remember that for the next time.

I told my 9 year old I didn’t care what he did in his Spring School photos. This is what he gave us. from pics

19. How can you not frame this?

Answer: you can’t.

My friend’s boyfriend was not happy about his kindergarten picture. His parents still have it framed in their house 20 years later. from funny

18. No reshoots, please.

You cannot improve upon perfection.

The school offered to re-shoot the photo buty parents declined. from blunderyears

17. Girlfriend knew exactly what she was doing.

She’s making the same face now!

Reagan brought home her school pictures today. Should I ground her or high-five her? #2020

Posted by Sarah Hurley on Friday, September 11, 2020

16. They’d better hope he never commits a crime.

Because that picture will end up on the air.

15. To be fair, no one knows how to smile in 1st grade.

I don’t know what to say about the eyes, though.

Apparently I didn’t know how to smile in first grade from blunderyears

14. Bless her heart.

Great taste in music.

My wife’s school picture with her most prized possession at the time. An Evanescence CD. from blunderyears

13. You can’t be mad about these.

It’s impossible.

Posted by Stronajai Miles on Saturday, November 9, 2019

12. He was just doing what he was told.

This is so funny.

I too was instructed not to blink during my elementary school yearbook photo. from funny

11. Definitely not the kid’s fault.

This one is on the school/photog.

10. She is all of us.

She’ll learn how to smile one day. Probably.

9. I mean, she looks fine.

Bless her heart.

10M, and looking like a middle age mom who’s deciding to grace you with a smile, while still judging you just a little from blunderyears

8. To be fair, she still looks super cute.

Maybe she wants to be a model.

My daughters first ever school photo. She was so excited for days, went in and got mugshot instead. from funny

7. That’s certainly a mood.

I hope he gets a laugh out of it one day.

I’m sure everyone needs a good laugh these days so thanks to my latest mom fail…you’re welcome in advance haha ?Mason…

Posted by Brittany Kinley on Tuesday, November 17, 2020

6. Wooooowwww this is a lot to take in.

I don’t know where to look first.

School photos sometimes in the early 2000s. I really thought I was "Da Bomb". I remember going to Limited Too and thinking those velour pants were a must. from blunderyears

5. And now he’s a meme.

That expression is all the kid, though.

4. The Timberlands. The shirt.

Oh my god the Pee Wee Herman.

Me in the 4th grade ready to go on some sort of tropical safari with my best friend. from blunderyears

3. I have a lot of questions.

Mostly about the egg.

2. He captured the very sweet smile.

I have no idea what he’s looking at, though.

1. This is the best thing I’ve ever seen.

Truly. In my entire life.

My brother’s Pre-k picture. He didn’t know how to smile. from blunderyears

I can only hope one of my kids comes home with an epic photo like this one day.

Because that would truly be a day that me and my hubby would LOL for days.

Has one of your kids’ school photos ever surprised you? Tell us how in the comments!

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Therapists Discuss Their “Holy Sh*t” Moments With Clients

We all have unique things that we deal with at our jobs on a daily basis, but therapists really see and hear some wild things.

And us non-therapists never really get a peek into that world…until now!

Therapists got real on AskReddit about the unusual things they’ve seen and heard on the job. Let’s take a look.

1. Awful.

“I was counseling a 13 year old girl for anxiety and she reported s*xual abuse from her step dad. I called her mom and told her mother I needed to call child protective services. Turns out that CPS was already aware and the abuse was first report around the patients age 7.

Mom was aware of the abuse and stayed with her husband anyway. It was a complicated situation, and it wasn’t. How could she not do more to protect her daughter?!

Sorry lady… I’m judging.”

2. People are sick.

“My professor once shared what a patient said that made her quit her job: “I didn’t r*pe my daughter, she liked it.” The daughter was six.

She couldn’t take it anymore. She worked in a rehabilitation centre for people who have been sentenced for serious crimes and were forced to get mental help.

Really difficult job and this pushed her over the edge.”

3. Good Lord…

“Once had a patient whose wife shook their baby to death. He wanted help reconnecting with his wife.

At the time I was a young father of a newborn myself, and he triggered a lot of fear in me for my own child, a deep loathing of his spouse, and pity (the “how pathetic” kind) for the patient.

I tried for 3 sessions, met his spouse and everything before handing the case over to my supervisor (who knew about my initial reactions, and tried to help me through it).

Unfortunately, it ended up being more about my feelings than his, and I was new to the profession at the time. These things are expected to crop up from time to time, but I was still taken aback by my own reactions.”

4. Dumbstruck.

“I work at a group home.

We had a kid who we had admitted four months prior, when in a family session they mentioned they had parasites. Mom said, “yeah, our whole family has them, we don’t get rid of them since they’re part of our biological ecosystem.”

I was dumbstruck.

We spent three weeks afterwards convincing this family it was an infectious disease concerns as other residents have fecal eating behaviors and various other unsanitary issues that could cause a unit spread.

Three weeks of education, planning, and worse of all convincing this kid and mother that their IQ wouldn’t drop because they had agreed to irradiate the parasites!!!

Lots of CBT work, but Jesus it took way longer than any of my team expected!”

5. Brutal.

“I work with kids who have experienced some kind of abuse/trauma (90% of my clients have been s*xually abused). I have a lot of holy sh*t moments but not from judgment of my clients but from what happened to them.

I’ve had clients whose father made them help him dismember mom’s body after dad murdered her in front of them. I’ve had clients under the age of 8 who have been s*x trafficked.

I’ve had clients who have been forced to film torture p*rn. I have holy sh*t moments all the time.”

6. Judging.

“I feel like a lot of the comments saying that they NEVER judge their clients might be working in voluntary services or they’ve been very fortunate in their client base. Judgement isn’t an inherently bad thing. It’s how we know that murdering people is wrong.

So when a convicted pedophile client told me, “nothing gets me going like a pair of little girl’s worn panties”, you better believe I judged the f*ck out of him. I continued to work with him and I treated him with compassion and respect because he’s a human being worthy of both; I did my job because I’m a professional.

But I can’t honestly say that I didn’t judge him. I judged that he should never be around children. I judged that he is not yet ready for change. I judged that his access to his own daughter should be closely supervised. That’s a lot of judgements.

Understanding your own inherent biases and how they influence your work is a very important part of training and practice.”

7. Not a good move.

“As the pandemic worsened here in the US and more lock downs are on their way, one of my most extroverted clients and I brainstormed ways to meet her social needs while remaining safe.

The following week she canceled her session and told me that she’s positive for COVID after attending an orgy, which definitely wasn’t one of our ideas.

I let out the deepest most defeated sigh after I hung up the phone.”

8. Anger management.

“I ran a men’s anger management group though, and some of those men had done some terrible things to women. Most of them I found ways to like and admire for their positive aspects, but there were two guys in that group I just could never find “unconditional positive regard” for.

One guy basically never spoke in group. He would give one word answers and occasionally just discuss how unfair the “system” was to him. I worked really hard to open him up and find things to connect over but he never opened up to me or the group. He left the group after he strangled his girlfriend and went to jail. She survived thankfully.

The other left group early routinely, showed up late, participated minimally and similarly never wanted to open up honestly. He left early one group after we had discussed him staying to the end and threatened me when I told him he wasn’t going to get credit for attendance (something the court required).

Oddly, I eventually moved into the apartment below him (completely without knowledge) and listened to him scream at his girlfriend and break sh*t while I called the cops.

I judge these men. They’re sh*tty. Maybe they’re redeemable, but redemption requires self-exploration and they both refused to do so. It’s worth noting how differently I felt about them than so many others in the group; men I found ways to help and admire and respect even in spite of their awful behavior in the past.”

9. Youth issues.

“I work with youth and adolescents who have anxiety, trauma, and/or depression. Some of the kids I worked with had some pretty severe attachment issues. Regardless of this, I never thought I’d have to seriously explain:

“You can’t just buy a straitjacket for your kid.”

“Feeding your kid ultra Spicy Ramen each night instead of the meal everyone else is eating isn’t specifically defined as abuse, but you have to understand the emotional abuse that this causes.”

“Your kid isn’t trying to kill you because they stand in your doorway at night crying. Thats likely because they’re scared of their traumatic nightmares, but feel like you will just yell at them if they wake you up.”

10. This is terrible.

“A woman who deliberately kept getting pregnant because she enjoyed the attention, and then would immediately afterwards dump her kids with the foster system or in one case a willing relative.

She had six kids at the time I met her…”

11. Drug lord.

“It’s not often I get to talk about my profession, but here goes: I was working at a drug and alcohol rehabilitation center and had a client come in who was a self proclaimed “drug lord”.

As we worked together, he told me about his history. Included in this history was how he got to where he was currently at.

During the conversation, this man admitted to selling his sister into s*x slavery, forcibly injecting her with several sedatives and narcotics, and having several people “teach her a lesson” (what this meant, he never shared). He told this story with a blank face, smiling only when he recalled the “good times”, which he referred to as times when he had enough heroin to get through the day.

I’m not sure where he is at now, but this man inspired me to work with victims of s*x trafficking, because not only do they deal with the stigma of “selling their bodies”, they often manage drug addictions.

People would honestly be floored of they realized how many people were addicted to chemicals that they were forcibly given.”

12. The straight story.

“I work in mental health and have worked in acute and crisis settings for the majority of my career.

The most notable event I experienced was when a young person had presented with significant ongoing suicidal ideation who was dealing with a lot of sh*t. I spent a lot of time with them mostly deescalation and working out what the plan should be moving forward.

One of their parents came in a little while later and I had the opportunity to speak to them about where their child was and what had been going on, with their consent of course. Midway through me trying to explain some of the psychological constructs and ways the parent could help they said to me, “is this going to take much longer I have a show to go and watch”.

All I can say is, I never judge my patients, I have never walked their path or viewed the world through their eyes. But the people around them who perpetuate the suffering of the people I work with through ignorance, malice and selfishness, I judge them.”

Have you ever had any major “oh sh*t” moments at your job?

If so, tell us your stories in the comments.

We’d love to hear ’em!

The post Therapists Discuss Their “Holy Sh*t” Moments With Clients appeared first on UberFacts.

Funny Memes That’ll Give You a Good Chuckle

Are you having a bad day? Never fear, more memes are here!

Check out these 13 memes that’ll help cheer you up if you’re down in the dumps.

1. Oh my goodness

Anything is possible in this job market, but who wouldn’t give the gig to a face like that?

Image Credit: someecards

2. The next sci-fi blockbuster

Grasshoppers, coming soon to a streaming platform near you.

Image Credit: someecards

3. LOL

This is the true mood of 2020.

Image Credit: someecards

4. That’s punny

Looks like this pup needs to learn some self-control.

Image Credit: someecards

5. Same

I’m ready for my first Birkin bag.

Image Credit: someecards

6. Um

Run for the hills? Call the authorities? Say a prayer and grab a baseball bat?

Image Credit: someecards

7. Been here far too many times

I’m sorry, friends, but we definitely do not sound like Mariah Carey.

Image Credit: someecards

8. Wow

Oversharing on social media might be the least of these folks’ problems if they’re traveling excessively right now.

Image Credit: someecards

9. An inconvenient truth

We all want to be Daria, but let’s be honest with ourselves. We’re Tina. Time to update my friend-fiction.

Image Credit: someecards

10. This is jarring

That’s the power of carnitas, baby.

Image Credit: someecards

11. Influencer status

You’re lying if you say you’ve never legitimately run your own cooking show in your head.

Image Credit: someecards

12. Excuse you?

Say it louder for everybody in the back.

Image Credit: someecards

13. We all know that feeling

This is exactly why Anne Hathaway is consistently one of the most relatable A-lister, multi-millionaire celebrities.

Image Credit: someecards

Here’s hoping that those memes gave you a good belly laugh. It’s nice to know that even in a world so dark, there are still plenty of new memes to brighten things up.

What are some of the funniest memes you’ve seen lately? Share them with us in the comments!

The post Funny Memes That’ll Give You a Good Chuckle appeared first on UberFacts.