15 Tweets That’ll Make You Feel Really, REALLY Old

I can’t deny it any longer: I’m getting OLD. My bones have started to make random noises when I move (especially in the morning), and I find myself constantly thinking, “That was so much better when I was a kid,” every time I check out the movies, shows, and music that my nieces and nephews are into.

These tweets aren’t helping matters much – I have a feeling they’re gonna affect you the same way they affected me: they’ll make you feel ANCIENT.

1. OH MY GOD

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2. How does this work?

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3. Gen Z

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4. That’s a very telling sign…

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5. And here we are

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6. Back in my day…

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7. 1955? SMH…

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8. Time’s up

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9. It was thrilling

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10. Old as SH*T

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11. I remember it well

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12. That is not good

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13. Not exactly

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14. Were they ever wrong?

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15. What could it be?

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Well… it’s 2:30. Time for my nap… ::sigh::

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10+ Acts of Vandalism That Are so Perfect, You’ll Almost Wish You’d Thought of Them

Now, I am by no means condoning the willful destruction or defacement of private property (that would be wrong). But, you can’t deny that every now and then, you see an act of vandalism that goes beyond destructiveness and actually makes you laugh or think. When that happens, it’s only natural to sometimes wish you’d been the one to have been that clever instead. I mean, hey man, game recognize game.

And these 13 acts raise vandalism to the level of art.

#1. Somebody’s got your number two.

Image Credit: Reddit

#2. That’s going to cost you on Yelp.

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#3. It’s more interesting already.

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#4. *snort*

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#5. Seriously SO much free time.

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#6. Just one little piece of tape.

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#7. Oh, man, I wish I could have been a fly on the wall of that Burger King bathroom.

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#8. An addendum that could save your life.

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#9. Yeah, I don’t know about the last piece of advice.

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#10. Some people never outgrow their childhood sense of humor.

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#11. It’s just common sense.

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#12. I mean, what else do you need?

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#13. Now that’s what I call the holiday spirit.

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I’m not saying break the law…I’m just saying impress me!

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PETA Tried Dissing the Late Steve Irwin and the Internet Was NOT Having It

Steve Irwin, the Australian conservationist known as “The Crocodile Hunter,” was the Dr. Dolittle of the millennial generation. We grew up watching his show, we were deeply influenced by his passion for wildlife, and we all wept when he died tragically in 2006.

On what would have been Irwin’s 57th birthday on February 22, Google honored him with a Google doodle on its homepage.

Photo Credit: Twitter

Most people on Twitter were moved by the tribute.

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And then PETA decided to get in on the action…bad move.

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People, predictably, got pretty fired up and decided to try to put PETA in its place.

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As you can see, people feel pretty strongly about Mr. Irwin and work he did while he was alive.

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And finally, we have this…

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Crikey!

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This Guy Made a “Glitter Bomb” that Blows Up in Amazon Thieves’ Faces

YouTuber Mark Rober has a pretty impressive engineering background, having worked on the Mars Rover for NASA. Needless to say, when you steal a package from a guy like that, he’s going to start finding creative solutions to the problem. Guys like Mark aren’t content with just calling the cops and getting just regular old revenge against them. Nope, he spent six months building a glitter bomb that would self-detonate when the thieves opened the package.

To be fair, Mark had no choice! The local police told him they didn’t have time to investigate the robberies, even though Mark had captured the whole thing on his home surveillance camera.

Photo Credit: YouTube, Mark Rober

“I just felt like something needs to be done to take a stand against dishonest punks like this,” Mark explained.

“If anyone was going to make a revenge bait package and over-engineer the crap out of it, it was going to be me.”

The glitter bomb also included four cameras to capture the thieves’ reactions, which took a good deal of ingenuity. There was also fart spray!

As a hint to any would-be thieves, Mark wrote a fake return address using the names and location of Home Alone. Luckily for viewers at home, it didn’t deter the thieves.

The glitter bomb package completely worked, as you can see in the video below.

Thankfully, the same bait package can be retrieved and used more than once. Genius.

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This Simple Dating Test Helps You Identify Potentially Abusive Partners

Here’s a shocking stat: intimate partner violence affects nearly 20 people around the U.S. every single minute. That’s over 10 million victims every year! It’s clearly a problem that needs to be tackled head-on, and we simply can’t afford to keep it hidden behind closed doors any longer.

Abusive relationships are notoriously difficult (and dangerous) to escape, so naturally, the best solution would be to never enter one in the first place. But with abuse so common, and abusers so sneaky, how can people possibly avoid them all?

One domestic violence counselor has a test to help out. The “No Test,” as he calls it, can help identify potential abusers early in a relationship.

Photo Credit: Pexels

“The No Test is basically to watch out for the way your partner responds the first time you change your mind or say no,” Rob explained on ABC News.

“While expressing disappointment is OK, it’s not the same as annoyed. Annoyed is ‘how dare you,’ a sign of ownership or entitlement.”

Rob points out that this test isn’t new knowledge for most women. Instead, the test helps validate that gut feeling that abusers are so good at manipulating you to ignore. It’s okay to say no to people. It never warrants anger.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

An important thing to remember, too, is that people don’t enter relationships with abusers on purpose. Abusers are quite good at charming people, and ending up in a relationship with an abuser is never your fault. Some abusers would pass the No Test with flying colors!

But if a partner fails this test? It’s a bright red flag that they’re a dangerous person, and you should trust your instinct.

As Rob said: “The only person who can stop the abuse is the person who is doing the abusing.”

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15+ Tweets from Kansas Police Departments That are so Funny, They Should be Illegal

Kansas seems to be a pretty funny place. I’ve got some coworkers from there who are hilarious, and Kansas also has Paul Rudd and Rob Riggle among its native sons. It seems everyone in Kansas is pretty funny, even the police departments.

The Twitter feeds for the Lawrence Police Department (Rock Chalk Jayhawk!) and the Topeka Police Department have been getting a lot of attention lately because of their hilarious posts.

1. E’rywhere

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2. Stepbrothers quote FTW

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3. They mean it

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4. Way more than half

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5. It is what it is

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6. Dummies

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7. That’ll work

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8. Cuddle time

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9. We promise

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10. Pt 2

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11. Way too cold

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12. We’re here for you!

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13. That is beautiful

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14. To do list

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15. Don’t break the law

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16. In training

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17. Not a smart move

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18. C’mon, Carl…

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19. Not a winner among them

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20. LOL

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You have the right to remain amused! See what I did there?…

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10 Totally Wild Facts About the Late, Great Steve Irwin

Steve Irwin, otherwise known as ‘The Crocodile Hunter’, was an integral part of my childhood. His love of animals was absolutely infectious, helping him become one of the most famous television stars in the world. Sadly, his life was cut short after a stingray pierced his chest while he was filming the documentary, Ocean’s Deadliest.

Below are 10 facts about the man himself that just might surprise you!

#1. He was terrified of parrots.

Image Credit: Pixabay

You might think he wasn’t afraid of any member of the animal kingdom, but he admitted that wasn’t true.

“The only animals I’m not comfortable with are parrots, but I’m learning as I go. I’m getting better and better at ’em. I really am … For some reason parrots have to bite me. That’s their job. I don’t know why that is.”

#2. He also met his wife, Terri, at a zoo.

Image Credit: Wikipedia

His entire family, including his wife Terri, played important roles in The Crocodile Hunter. Terri’s love for animals also began at a young age – she opened Cougar Country in 1986, a facility that helped rehabilitate foxes, raccoons, bobcats, bears, and cougars before releasing them back into the Oregon wild.

She made a trip to the Australia Zoo in 1991 and saw Steve Irwin for the first time – and it was love at first sight.

#3. His life’s goal was to increase people’s knowledge about conservationism.

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People might have watched The Crocodile Hunter to catch Steve’s zany antics and check out cool animals, but Irwin’s goal was to educate the public and dispel myths that put the animals in danger.

“I’ve always seen Jaques Cousteau as a hero,” he said. “He’s a legend, like my dad, just a legend. And so what he did for conservation in the 60s and through the 70s was just phenomenal. And I was to be just like him, you know? I want to have a milestone, you know? I want to create history.”

#4. He was bitten often, and realized it made for good television.

Image Credit: Animal Planet

Irwin knew he took the chance of one of his animals objecting to being put on display, and he also knew it was one of the reasons people tuned in.

“Now and again I do get bitten,” he told ABC Australia. “And it’s that, you know, that sense of morbidity that people do have. There’s no use sticking your head in the sand and going, ‘Oh, no, they’re only here because, you know, I talk well.’ Nah, man, they wanna see me come unglued.”

#5. He grew up at a zoo.

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His family moved to Beerwah, near Queensland, in Australia and opened the Beerwah Reptile Park in 1970 and Steve spent his formative years helping feed the animals before eventually taking over as the owner. It’s still in operation as the Australia Zoo.

He told Larry King “My dad was a wildlife expert. His field was herpetology, one who studies reptiles, and my mom was a wildlife rehabilitator.”

#6. Both kids are following in their dad’s footsteps.

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Bindi Irwin had her own Discovery Kids series called Bindi the Jungle Girl and starred with her brother on Growing Up Wild for The Pet Collective YouTube channel. In 2015 she won the 21st season of Dancing with the Stars and captured hearts all over America.

Bob Irwin is now 15 and stars with his mom and sister in Steve Irwin’s Wildlife Warriors and co-hosted Wild But True on Discovery Kids. In 2017 he appeared on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, introducing the host and audience to a handful of animals.

#7. They filmed the first episode of The Crocodile Hunter on their honeymoon.

Image Credit: Wikipedia

Their honeymoon was spent traveling around Australia trapping crocodiles for relocation (because of course it was). She told the story of how The Crocodile Hunter was born during an interview with Scientific American.

“We dropped our honeymoon, we went to north Queensland, and we helped this crocodile and filmed a documentary on the premise that the cameraman just chases Steve around. Steve hadn’t been to acting school, he had no preconceived notions. His background was exactly what you see on television, he’s done that all his life. We thought we’d do one show. What happened was, it did really well, so we did a part two. And from then on, we found that Steve’s natural behavior in the wild happens to be fascinating!”

Irwin’s natural enthusiasm, of course, turned out to be what made his show an immediate success.

#8. He discovered a new species of turtle.

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It was an accident – he caught it on a fishing trip and realized he’d never seen another turtle like it. They sent the pictures to herpetologist John Cann who confirmed they’d found something brand new – the species is called Elseya irwini (Irwin’s snapping turtle).

You can see one at Baltimore’s National Aquarium if you’re not traveling to Australia anytime soon.

#9. His show was popular around the world.

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The Crocodile Hunter was a huge hit in America and Australia, but the series was seen and loved by hundreds of millions in 130 different countries.

#10. There’s a snail named after his famous catchphrase.

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“Crikey!” It’s the phrase everyone associates with Steve Irwin, and in 2009, Dr. John Stanisic discovered a tree snail that he named accordingly – the crikey steveirwini.

He told ABC Australia that it was “a colorful snail, with swirling bands of creamy yellow, orange-brown and chocolate giving the shell an overall khaki appearance.”

His legacy, I’m sure, is in good hands.

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Police Solved a 25-Year-Old Murder by Using Ancestry DNA Data and a Dirty Napkin

Most of think that all these new DNA testing services are just a fun way to find out what mix of ethnicities you really are. Maybe you’ll discover an ancestor who was on the Mayflower, or get connected to a long-lost cousin.

It turns out, however, that the DNA databases you’re submitting your sample to can also be utilized by law enforcement agencies, helping them do things like, oh, let’s say, linking the DNA they got from the spit on your Chipotle napkin to the evidence from that cold-case murder you’ve managed to keep covered up since the 1990s.

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Hope you enjoyed that extra guac. It’s the last you’re going to get for a while.

Minnesota businessman Jerry Westrom, 52,  was arrested by police after his DNA was linked to crime scene evidence from the scene of 35-year-old Jeanie Childs 1993 stabbing death. They got that DNA from a napkin he tossed into a trash can at his daughter’s hockey game. He was brought in for questioning and, according to the Minneapolis Star Tribune, denied all allegations, but the hard evidence meant he still had to post $1 million bail for his release. (Lest you feel sorry for Mr. Westrom, the DNA matched sperm found on a towel and a comforter in the murdered woman’s apartment. Gross.)

Hennepin County Sheriff’s Office

This isn’t the first time a personal ancestry company has helped police solve a cold case. DNA that matched records from one such company helped solve the 1986 murder of a 12-year-old girl in Washington State, and also helped catch the notorious Golden State Killer. A lot of people are up in arms about the ethics of using DNA matches from these databases to justify arrests, saying that most people send their spit to these companies for entertainment’s sake, and they don’t expect their distant cousins to get arrested as a result.

Image Credit: Pixabay

Police say that’s too bad. They’ve been using DNA evidence to solve cases, both hot and cold, for decades. Bio-data companies, recreational or not, are just one more source of that information – and they’re exploding in popularity. Considering that these services can match you up with third and fourth cousins based on one little q-tip of spit, a lot more criminals can look forward to the very real possibility of being arrested for a crime committed decades ago.

So, if you have any literal skeletons in your closet, or really anywhere that police may have noticed at any point in time…you may want to think twice before throwing out your used napkins.

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New Research Reveals Sleep Deprivation Can Actually Damage Your DNA

Tough news for anyone who’s having trouble getting enough sleep (so, basically all of us): a recent study published in Anaesthesia confirms that lack of sleep is so bad for your health, it can actually f*** up your DNA. This, in turn, can cause serious health problems down the road. It’s the first study to “quantify DNA damage directly in young adults who are required to work overnight shifts.”

The research team was out of Hong Kong and studied 49 healthy doctors. 24 of them worked overnight shifts between 5 and 6 times a month. The participants gave blood when they were rested and also after they pulled all-nighters, and gave other health information as well in order to rule out factors that could influence the study.

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What they found was that even when the doctors who regularly went without sleep were well-rested, their DNA had lower gene expression, more DNA breaks, and generally appeared more damaged than those doctors who never stayed up all night.

Why does it matter? Well, DNA damage has been linked to a host of health issues, like heart attacks, diabetes, and certain types of cancer – a meta-analysis of 2 million people found a link between working night shifts and the incidence of breast tumors.

Dr. Siu-Wai Choi of Hong Kong University and senior author of the study, said in a statement:

“Although this work is very preliminary, it is clear from the results that even a single night of sleep deprivation can trigger events that may contribute to the development of chronic disease.”

This is, of course, just one single study, and more research is needed to determine the significance of the relationship between the DNA damage and the sleep deprivation. The sample doctors who were often pulling overnighters tended to be younger than the other group and all of the participants were of Chinese descent. A much wider study would need to be conducted to confirm findings.

Image Credit: Pixabay

“This study is important in that it will allow future researchers to study the impact of changing the way we work and other interventions by evaluation DNA breaks in the same way as the authors of this groundbreaking study have done.”

There are other factors that could come into play, like shift workers having a greater predisposition to suffering from chronic illness, changes to activity and eating patterns, and disruptions to circadian rhythms and sex hormone balances.

Even though the findings need to be confirmed, it seems safe to say that if you take care to do everything you can to stay healthy in the future, don’t skimp on the sleep – it’s as important as anything else you do with your body.

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China Had to Close their Everest Base Camp Because It’s Basically Just a Pile of Garbage

That’s gotta be humiliating!

China recently had to tell tourists that their Mount Everest base camp is closed… because it is too full of trash.

Photo Credit: Twitter/PretoriaRecord

According to Xinhua Net, that not only are tourists prevented from entering the zone, but climbing permits will be limited to only 300 per year. That’s a third fewer than normal.

So, is this China’s fault?

Nope.

This has been a problem that has been happening for YEARS.

According to South China Morning Post, Nepal has implemented a $4,000 trash deposit cost per team due to all the trash that climbers leave behind.

Only problem with that are climbers are usually rich, so they don’t care about the deposit. Only half the climbers in recent years have been bringing down the required amount of garbage.

And that doesn’t even take into account the fecal matter. Because, yes, people go to the bathroom on the mountain. 12,000 lbs. worth every year.

Here’s hoping that China can figure out how to get their camp clean, and then help work on the rest of this mess.

Yuck.

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