As the influential philosophers at Good Burger once told us, “I’m a dude, he’s a dude, she’s a dude, we’re all dudes, hey.”
That’s what was playing on repeat in my head when I was reading through this thread on Ask Reddit:
If you were the opposite sex for a day, what would you do? from AskReddit
There were a lot of posts from my fellow men which predictably fell into the category of “I’D TOUCH ALL MY LADY PARTS A LOT AND DO THE FAPPING!”
Which, yanno, ok. Let’s leave that behind for a moment and look at the responses that women gave about what they’d do if they were men. I’m sure it will be a lot more thoughtful and enlightening.
1. …oh.
Helicopter!
Masturbate, masturbate, masturbate.
Retract foreskin.
Replace foreskin.
Helicopter.
Pee on a tree.
Sex.
– Mtoastyo
2. Guess we’re not so different.
Jack off ngl i wanna know what it’s like to orgasm that easily
– f*ckmeup-scotty
3. Oof, this one hurts.
Go for a walk at night
– Calingaladha
4. Wow, really?
Sing.
I’ve always admired the vocal range and the sound of a male’s voice.
It’s just… Wow.
– CryptikAngel
5. Don’t bother – childbirth is definitely worse.
Get myself kicked in the b*lls so we could settle the debate of whether it hurts more than childbirth.
– saelcaha
6. WHY?
I would whip out my d*ck and pee everywhere possible.
– cuntiee
7. See this is darkly fascinating.
Am female, so would be male.
I would get all the jobs done that I need doing eg car serviced, guttering fixed, house insurance updated and so on. My husband generally does these because he gets better deals. We tried it last year where I made a call, then he did. And he consistently got a better deal. Not exactly an empirically proven experiment but it was enough for us to decide he’s in charge of negotiating anything financial!
– SmolEmmywem
8. Freud was right?
I think about this all the time, I have a bad case of penis envy.
I would definitely get a blow job, I need to know how that feels. I would also masterbaute.
I would write my name with pee! I would put stuff on my erect penis and try to fling it in my mouth. I want a penis so bad!! They’re so cool!!
– biscuit272
9. Um…
Try and save as much of sperm as possible so I can get myself pregnant.
– ta_janae
10. This answer came up a LOT.
I would spend the day swinging my penis around like a pinwheel
– topsinator
11. It is pretty nice.
Walk around shirtless
– StuckInDreams
12. Username checks out.
Be euphoric for a day
– transpersonmaybe
13. *Sigh.* Yeah.
Let’s be real here.
Everyone would masturbate.
– SmallDixxsRBeautiful
14. Are they that bad?
Celebrate.
No more boobs.
– imjustlivinghere
15. The range of motion is really pretty limited, ya’ll.
get a blowjob and make my d*ck move on command
– sailorigor
Well, now we’ve gotten to the bottom of that question, I guess.
What would you do if you could switch sexes for a day?
Tell us in the comments.
The post Women Admit What They Would Do if They Were Men for a Day appeared first on UberFacts.