I believed that once I started working from home, and most everyone else did too, that things would be better for me in one important way.
Once ALL meetings went to video chat, and all assignments were just pinged back and forth between apartments, I thought to myself “At least I’ll never be late now.”
What a fool I was.
Somehow I have managed to be late for things that have involved nothing more than walking the ten feet from my bedroom to my desk. SOMEHOW I’ve even managed to mess up the timing when I’m already AT my desk and I just forgot to open up the link in time. It’s a sad state of affairs. But I know I’m not alone, because I’ve got a lot of fellow “always lates” on Twitter to commiserate with.
10. Common courtesy
Can’t you see that I’m terrified and full of misdirected rage?
Kinda rude that these other drivers don’t care that I used my time poorly and am running late for work.
— Mary (@AnniemuMary) December 4, 2019
9. Sublime connections
And then you get that rush of a feeling like “Maybe we’ll cancel.”
Sex is cool, but have you ever been running late and the person you’re meeting texts they’re running late?
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) October 4, 2020
8. Identity crisis
You can accuse me of many things, but of this my hands are clean.
i may be a lot of things .. but on time? i could never lmao
— Luis Vercetti (@97Vercetti) December 13, 2019
7. Short sighted
It’s true, that’s just science.
Short people should never be shamed for being late. Our little legs are going as fast as they can.
— Missy Baker (@TheMissyBaker) January 12, 2021
6. Double jeopardy
In for a dime, in for a dollar.
If you're already late.. Take your time.. You can't be late twice.
— ‘Lalekan Aremu (@LalekanAremu) January 31, 2017
5. Slow your roll
That is a straight up power move right there.
I be running late and still have the audacity to take my time.
— Lisa Mila (@milamiarose) October 8, 2020
4. Let ’em loose
You’d be shocked how quickly I can get on a high horse.
as a chronically late person, whenever i’m early, i am a feral cat in the waiting room, ready to destroy all the chairs with unrestrained pride
— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) April 22, 2019
3. Fool me once, shame on you
Fool me thirty seven times, why are we even still friends?
lol just imagine being friends with me for more than 2 years and still believing my “i’m leaving in 5 min” texts
— lindsay (@LindsayKosley) July 24, 2018
2. The towel game
This is an ancient ritual which mustn’t be disturbed.
Sorry I’m late I sat on my bed in a towel for 34 mins staring at a wall Lol
— IG: Gboye__Ginger (@Gboye_Rave) May 21, 2019
1. Savor it
It’s the little things.
Sorry for being late to work but I got stuck enjoying my last few moments of not being at work. http://t.co/sc4u147aHh via @someecards
— Sasha Stewart (@ArtfulStew) August 26, 2014
I guess there’s just no hope for me and my lateness.
But what about you? Can you actually manage to get places on time? If so, how?
Tell us your secrets in the comments.
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