These 12+ Tweets About Fruits and Veggies That Are Inexplicably Funny

A list of hilarious tweets about produce probably isn’t something you thought you’d be reading today…but here we are! But then again, the internet (especially Twitter) never fails to surprise us in both good and bad ways.

These are definitely a good surprise, so settle in and have a laugh!

#15. And yet, it’s always a disappointment.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#14. And my toddler’s.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#13. Zucchini are the Thanos of the garden.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#12. Dammit.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#11. Don’t even get me started on potatoes.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#10. I demand an explanation.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#9. Somebody always has to be extra.

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#8. SHAME.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#7. I feel this on a spiritual level.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#6. Not only that, he knows how to SELL them!

Photo Credit: Twitter

#5. Banana bread isn’t for everyone.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#4. No argument.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#3. So sweet and naive.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#2. You were warned.

Photo Credit: Twitter

#1. It always goes back to mom.

Photo Credit: Twitter

You know you laughed!

The post These 12+ Tweets About Fruits and Veggies That Are Inexplicably Funny appeared first on UberFacts.

Make Your Day Just a Little More Interesting With These 6+ Random Facts

I strongly suggest that you ponder these facts. Or don’t. I can’t really tell you what to do.

But I do think they will make your day just a little bit brighter.

1. Might want to change that…

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2. I’m in!

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3. Translation

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4. That was quick

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5. Wait until you’re outside

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6. Super sized

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7. Smart birds

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These 5+ Random Facts Will Really Make You Think

Ever wondered what animal Freddie Mercury really loved? Well, I bet you are now. And you’ll have to wait until the end of this list to find out. Don’t worry, it’s worth it.

Trust me.

1. That’ll do it

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2. Groups

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3. I’m watching you…

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4. Red Nova

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5. Saturday sweets

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6. Way to go!

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7. Cat lover

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These 6+ Facts Will Smack You Right in the Face

Sometimes, learning a new fact can change the way you look at the whole world.

Here are 7 facts for you to chew on…

1. Big balls

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2. Cool!

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3. Just a reminder

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4. Technosphere

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5. Don’t play that song

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6. That’s a good trick

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7. An independent woman

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6+ Totally Random Facts About Everything from Glitter to Guns

What do glitter and guns have in common? Well, nothing, other than the fact that there are facts about both of them in this list!

Enjoy…

1. I know I have it…

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2. Forensic glitter

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3. Lighten up

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4. That’s scary

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5. Make it fun!

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6. Shimmering

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7. Illusion of truth

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15 Personal Encounters with Real Life Killers That Will Send Chills Down Your Spine

It may not be easy to think about, but the reality is that there are killers living among us every day. And, unless you had an encounter with one of them, you may not ever be able to tell.

In this AskReddit article, people who have had encounters with killers reveal what happened.

1. Creepy

“A man came to my grandma’s house and said he was having car trouble, asked to borrow a wrench. He followed my grandma into her garage and picked up a hammer and whacked her in the back of the head with it. He thought she had died, her skull cracked open. He just left her there, she lived in the middle of the woods. But she didn’t die.

He was caught before he murdered anyone else, and investigators found all kinds of evidence of him stalking her before coming to kill her. In the months before this she noticed strange things out of place, the sink left dripping, doors open, unfamiliar smells, ect. But then- when she washed the outfits that were on her doll collection, she noticed tears and holes in them- and slits ripped into the doll bodies. She immediately changed the locks. He stabbed her dolls.

Then she came home to a break a while later. They only stole only one thing, an old boy scout pin that her father frequently wore. She looked at it from time to time, it had huge sentimental- (but no monetary) value. Turns out it was him the whole time. No one knows exactly how long he had stalked her. He had stalked and killed 2 others in the next town over before coming to my grandma.

It’s terrifying to think that it could be happening to anyone at anytime.”

2. The Backpack Killer

“My grandparents owned a small cafe in the town of Bowral, NSW Australia. Ivan Milat was a regular customer there, they didn’t know him on a personal level, just a causal “G’day, Ivan!”. They knew his parents as well. Crazy stuff knowing that my grandparents would always be in 1m contact with one of Australia’s most notorious serial killers every couple days.”

3. The van

“I was the first to notice the big white carpet company van that parked behind our house every day around dinner. I must have been 7, and my younger sister was 4. We would play in our fenced-in yard that shared one side with the alleyway, giving anyone walking by a full view of our lawn and the back of our house as well as the backyard of the house next door.

Looking back, I was a total goody-goody and deliberately found any way to suck up to my parents. Our school had just given the typical 90’s “stranger danger” presentation, and had specifically described scenarios where men in big white vans with no windows offered you candy to get in, then drove away with you. I was more proud than scared when I dragged them both outside to show that van out to my parents – like it had been some real-world test. Clearly, I had aced it!

I can’t really recall their response, but I know they didn’t feel the need to escalate it. Maybe they hadn’t noticed the van until the day I pointed it out, but they weren’t bothered enough by it to investigate further.

After we went outside to look at the van, it never appeared in our alley again. A few days passed, however, and by eaves-dropping in adult conversations as goody-goody suck ups do, I caught on that something terrible had happened next door. The boy that lived there was 11-ish (and wanted nothing to do with me or my sister, so obviously we weren’t close) had been taken from their front yard, and neighbors reported seeing a large, white, windowless van drive away. My parents were able to give a great description of the van they had seen in the alley previously, including the carpet store logo – in case that happened to be the vehicle the other neighbors saw.

The police must have easily spotted the van, as I remember the older boy returning home within the next day or so. Being so young and sheltered at the time, I can’t speak to any grizzly details as to how the boy was treated or what happened while was gone. All I can say is that the whole family packed up and moved out shortly thereafter.”

4. Psycho

“Got beat up when I was 10 by a man who was a law professor at a fairly prestigious University. He kicked the living s*** out of me pretty hard. Threatened to kill me if i said anything. I didn’t. I lied to my parents about what happened.

A little while later he shot his family with a 12 gauge.”

5. Mom’s best friend

“Not a serial killer but a mass murderer.

His mom was my mom’s best friend. After the murders happened, his mom kind of fell off the face of the planet. She was already raising her other son’s kids because he was in prison for drug related things, and then him not only going to prison but for murdering 4 small kids and his girlfriend, just completely broke her. I think it would any mother.

He sat in my house and gave me 2 tattoos when I was 19 and gave my mom 2 at that time as well.

His mom kept saying he should ask me out and he agreed and was acting flirty. But not only did I find him wildly unattractive, he was covered in swastikas. He had been to prison, also for drugs, and said he didn’t agree with the ideology but got them to fit in at prison. I could see one of the swastikas was actually in the process of being covered with something else and his mom was basically an aunt to me and me and my mom trusted her. She said he had turned his life around since prison and was a really talented tattoo artist and could give us a discount to add to his portfolio.

At the time, nothing really indicated he was capable of murdering children. The swastikas sent a pretty bad message but I didn’t think TOO much of it after he said it was just a survival tactic or whatever, I have heard of that. He was just kind of a trashy, talkative guy. But after those details came out.. idk.”

6. Dated a killer

“Dated one and didn’t know it. Didn’t actually realize it until he and his buddy kidnapped me and held me prisoner for a week and a half. Turned out they were pretty big-time drug dealers who were also human traffickers who liked torture women to death just for kicks.”

7. Lady in the white car

“I lived in a house and knew all my surrounding neighbors. Landlord next door, his sister on the other side, and the 5 houses across the street belonged to families whos kid(s) went to my school or were acquainted with my parents. I was in 4th or 5th grade at the time.

I was walking home from school one day and it was pretty hot. This lady pulls up in a white car and offers me a ride home. I tell her “no thanks” and continue walking. She follows me for a minute or two before pulling up again and saying that “It’s ok, I don’t mind.” and that she recognized me as her neighbor across the street.

I immediately knew it was bullshit, because I know all my neighbors. I ask, “Ok. What street do we live on then?” and she said that she doesn’t remember because she just moved in recently. I tell her no again, but this time I start to walk in the opposite direction so she can’t follow me. She turns the corner and I immediately run to a friends house that was closer to where I was.

I told my parents of course. A couple days later a friend of mine told me a mexican lady in a white car tried to offer him a ride after school while he was walking home, saying she was his neighbor. He was literally two houses down from where he lived so he told her to f off and ran home. He wasn’t making it up because only my mom knew about the incident at that time. My parents and his parents alerted the school.

Please teach your kids not to accept anything from strangers. I was feeling sick that day and if I didn’t know exactly who my neighbors were, I don’t know how that situation would of played out. My friend was just an a-hole, smart, or a combination of both so we both turned out lucky in the end.”

8. Serial killer

“A serial killer in Florida… our neighbor was found decapitated and after he was found (responsible for 5 murders of women) we were let known he kept a book, inside was all info on my family, what time we usually got home, what we wore almost everyday, what vehicles we drove, descriptions, approx ages and more.”

9. Robert Pickton

“Not me but my mother.

My parents were both heroin addicts in Vancouver during the 80’s – early 90’s. At one point during this time my dad spent about a year in jail, and right after he went away my mother found out she was pregnant. She got clean shortly after finding out she was pregnant and kept off the heroin for the rest of her pregnancy but she was still struggling to get by on her own.

Previously, when my dad wasn’t bringing in enough cash dealing drugs or was in jail (frequent flyer) my mom would end up turning tricks in addition to whatever work she could scrounge up while living out of shelters and getting high. As she was pregnant she was reluctant to put herself at risk of being attacked and was picking up cleaning shifts at a couple of shitty local motels. She would make a bit of extra money by letting a few friends bring clients to the rooms before she cleaned them.

Every once in a while, her friends would send a client her way if she was really strapped for cash. Usually these were regulars that my mom was already familiar with and felt safe around and she wouldn’t turn down the money. One night when she was around six months pregnant, her friend mentioned that a guy had been asking around for a working girl that sounded an awful lot like her but he didn’t know her name. He described the tattoo on her leg, her hair colour, and the mole on her cheek perfectly so it was pretty clear to the friend who he meant. Friend asked if she should tell him where to find her/how to get in touch since it seemed like he might be one of her old clients, but my mom says she got an awful feeling in the pit of her stomach so she made an excuse about not feeling well and told her not to. Before they parted ways that evening they made plans for her friend to accompany her to a prenatal appointment at hospital a couple days later.

On the morning of the appointment, my mom’s friend didn’t show up. My mom called her apartment and when there was no answer, she went over and let herself in with the spare key. Nobody was home. Assuming her friend had simply forgotten, she went to her appointment alone and went home afterwards slightly annoyed at her for flaking. She tried calling a couple times more that night before asking around about her. No one had seen her for the last two nights, which was rare as they were the busiest nights of the week in the business.

Turns out the last time anyone saw her, she was getting in a car with the same guy that had been asking about my mother. No one ever saw her again. Her body was never found, which makes more sense when you find out that the man who picked her up was later identified by witnesses as Robert Pickton, a local pig farmer and serial killer who would grind up the bodies of his victims and feed them to his pigs (pork from those pigs was distributed across the province for human consumption).”

10. Bundy

“Not me, but my ninth grade english teacher once told us about the time she was stalked by Ted Bundy. She was in college at the time and worked nights at a bar. He approached her one night flirting, asking her out, etc. but she wasn’t interested. He was very persistent, and after a while she got angry and told him to get lost.

Later, walking home that night, she noticed a car following her pretty closely. She didn’t look back because she knew that showing any sign of fear gave him control of the situation, so she walked straight into her dorm and warned all her friends. He waited outside for several hours, but eventually gave up.

After telling us the story, she reminded us that if anything like that ever happens to you, don’t go home. Either call the police or go straight to the police station. She got lucky that he didn’t come back for her, and several months later she read about him on the news and recognized his picture and the description of his car.”

11. Almost kidnapped

“Came close to being kidnapped. I know it. The police in my town know it.

I have gone on walks at all times of day and night since I was about 15 or 16. My town is small and safe, but I learned after this particular incident that even the smallest, sleepiest of towns aren’t completely safe. It still gives me anxiety thinking about this night, specifically what may have happened, too much.

It was only about 6 o’ clock, but since it was December, it was already dark. I had just gotten an MP3 player for Christmas, and I loved listening to music and just walking around near my neighborhood. I was just coming down the road to my house when I noticed a car coming around the curve.

I normally would look back at any car coming, even if I was on the sidewalk. I don’t know why I didn’t this time. But it was going very slowly, and I’ve been asked by completely well-meaning people who live around here if I needed a ride, so I was assuming they were gearing up to roll down the window and ask if I needed a ride.

They never asked. I kept walking, got to the spot where the sidewalk ends because my road has a large chunk where there just isn’t one, so you’re forced to walk at the side of the road or the grass. We’re just barely at the edge of town.

The automobile – it was either a dark blue or black jeep – pulled over to the side of the road. Two men got out and began following me down the road.

If you’ve never experienced anything like this, I have no idea how universal this is, but all I can describe is a surge of adrenaline and some sort of primal instinct. One that just KNOWS things. I knew, somehow, that if I were to take off running, they would chase me. I don’t know how or why, but I knew, and I still know that’s how it would have went down. I was analyzing so much so quickly – the running and chasing wouldn’t work in my favor because the stretch of road back home was probably a good 50-100 feet. I thought about diving into the fenceline/field that is adjacent to my yard, but I realized that would hinder me more than help me. They’d catch me, probably before I made it that far.

I realized my only hope was to keep calm and keep an eye on them. I kept turning back to glance at them, and they just kept maintaining eye contact every time I turned to look. I kept walking. Kept calm. But terrified. My house was right there. I would have been snatched up basically right outside it.

I prayed for a car to come by. It almost felt like fate or divine intervention when, no sooner did I silently have the thought/prayer for a car, one came around the curve at the veeeeeery far end of the road from the direction I was walking.

The guys dove into the bushes at the edge of the neighbor’s driveway. They were SO obvious that they were up to no good. I remember having the thought that my situation was super similar to the scene in Twilight where Bella prays for a car to come or whatever and a car does, and she’s grateful. I know, weird thing to think when you’re in that situation, but that’s just how it goes.

So, the car passes, it leaves the area, and I’m wondering how the hell I’m going to manage, because I’m still a ways from my yard.

My uncle was just leaving my house on his bike at that exact moment. He rides up, and I flag him down. He starts to say bye, and I’m just like, “there are two guys in the bushes right now following me!” He looks, and they’re poking their heads out. He calmly tells me to hurry up and get home. I don’t need to be told, honestly. He sits there and keeps an eye on me until I’m in the yard and safe.

I go in and tell my mom, and she sees right as they pull out and drive through the cemetery nearby (which is closed and off-limts past dusk). They then take off.

My uncle calls as soon as he gets home and asks me if I noticed that there was a third guy coming up from behind on the sidewalk. I said no, I’d only seen the two guys. There had apparently been a third coming up, but I couldn’t see him because it was so dark, since there used to be a large gap between street lights right in that stretch of road.

My mom called the cops, and they came out. They told me I did an excellent job getting descriptions of the automobile and the people I did see, since normally people panic and can’t recall details. I was just frustrated I never saw a license plate, but the jeep was behind me and I didn’t get a chance to look long enough for that.

They agreed that the guys were definitely after me, but nothing ever came of it. They kept an eye out in the area and kept an eye out for a dark colored jeep, but I never saw it again.

I’m sitting here trembling now, haha. Can’t tell if it’s because the AC is on and I’m cold, or because recalling this story is always kind of nerve-wracking, because my mind wanders to a lot of what-ifs, but uh… it definitely felt like I had some guardian angel or some shit that kept throwing obstacles in the way for these creepy men. I was actually so afraid to walk down that stretch of road at night for a LONG time afterward, and sometimes I still can’t do it.

EDIT: To answer the question properly, I knew something was wrong as soon as they pulled over and got out of their automobile.”

12. Saved by the pie

“Raoul Moat gave me a cigarette aged 10, the winter before he killed.

I was 10 years old (duh) and walking past a pub with a few older mates. he approached us and asked if we wanted a cigarette. we said sure and he gave us one each. he said he could get us beer if we came with him but we said no partly bc have you seen the him? Hes a beefy guy and we knew better and secondly my mum does the best cottage pie and it was cottage pie night so i wasnt about to be kidnapped on the best night of the week.”

13. Truck ride

“Got a ride in a semi truck from a serial killer.. The smell was horrible. Like something I never smelled before.. Jumped out when I got close to where I lived. The guys face was crooked, and that smell. Come to find out Henry Lee Lucas enjoyed cadavers.. Saw the guy on Tv about a month later, then it all made sense…”

14. Mass shooter

“My family is Black. My mom grew up as his mom’s best friend and my mom was one of the only Black kids at her school (I think the first.) Fast forward and he becomes my cousin’s (mixed) friend growing up and they’re cool and all. Eventually, he moves away after his mom marries some weirdo racist guy. 2 years later, he becomes a super racist and shoots up a church.

I’ve briefly rubbed shoulders with him when I was younger and visiting my cousin and my little brother has hung out with him before. Pretty weird.”

15. Terrifying

“William Strader. From Canada; in Philly in the early 80s. Called himself Jack Snyder; said he had a sick relative there. My friend and I met him in a bar, where he bragged about “killing n*****s” on a train platform in NJ, and doing all kinds of drugs. I found him to be a lying racist asshole and left. She stayed.

A couple of days later, I got home from a work study job at about 11:30 at night. She and I and a couple of other punx were sharing a house. She was lying on the floor, and pretty fcked up on unknown substances. She said she’d gone out w him, done some downs and awakened to find herself naked and Strader next to her. Apparently, he’d roofied and raped her. She was crying.

For unknown reasons, she didn’t reject him right there. He came over another time when I was there. I flagrantly dissed him and left. Later, she said that the dis angered him and that he had threatened me, saying that I had better watch myself. I laughed, still finding him a racist lying braggadocious raping asshole.

Nothing more.

My friend’s mental health was deteriorating, in some part due to drugs, in another to the emergent schizophrenia the drugs had set off. All of this was apparent in retrospect; not so much then.

Shortly afterward, I saw Strader’s face on the front page of the Phila Inquirer: he had been arrested for the murder of a stripper, was a suspect in the disappearance of several others, a college student in West Chester, PA, and two exotic dancers in Canada. Accordingly to the Inquirer, the two dancers had been dismembered.

I showed the article to my friend Su. Doing so may have tipped her into full blown psychosis. She never recovered; is still institutionalized today. In that way, she is another Snyder/Strader victim. I guess I got lucky. Until I tripped over this thread, I had not thought of that summer–83 or 84– in ages.

I still feel kind of guilty, and clueless, thinking all that time that Strader was a no delusional but harmless kook. The “killing n*****s” panned out too, with two men shot on a regional rail platform in Trenton.

Weird and sad at once”

The post 15 Personal Encounters with Real Life Killers That Will Send Chills Down Your Spine appeared first on UberFacts.

15 College Students Tell Their Most Unforgettable Fire Alarm Stories

Fire drills are a part of college that people rarely talk about even though we all had to deal with them. If you lived in a dorm your first (or second, or third) year, then you know how horrible it was to file out of your room in the middle of the night no matter what the weather was like outside.

AskReddit users share their most memorable fire alarm tales.

1. Burned food

“Graduate apartment, someone burns food while cooking. They open their door to let out the smoke – exactly what they are not supposed to do. The hallway smoke detectors are a lot more sensitive than the kitchen ones and we all have to get outside at 1 am in the middle of a blizzard. Luckily I was sleeping with underwear on and I grabbed sweatpants and a tshirt quickly.”

2. Lots of laughs

“It’s actually pretty great. So we knew were getting a late night fire alarm, like 2 a.m. late, so most of the hall decided to stay up, it was a weekend after all. Well someone throws around the idea of faking the rapture and we got IN on it. We invited one of our friends to come watch Tangled in the lounge and she went to shower while we got to work.

Everyone changed out of the clothes they were wearing and we placed them all over the room like we had just been taken. Some of us were on the couches, others at the table, and even a few on the floor. We had books open, the movie playing, popcorn popped, hell we even put underwear in the piles to make it more believable. So we do all this set up and almost everyone on the hall piles into one central room. And then we wait.

This girl was in the shower for like an hour so as we all sit there we start to get worried, we’re on a time frame after all and what if the alarm goes off before we can pull this off? Then we hear talking in the hallway and it’s the RA and RD coming to pull the alarm for the drill! So we grab them and shove them into the room with us and make them keep quiet cause we are NOT letting all this work go to waste.

The girl finally leaves her room and we hear her calling for everyone in the lounge. She’s mostly just confused but when she starts knocking on doors we start to get worried. So we shove one of the people in the room with us out to convince her it’s happened (I was suggested as a sacrifice but I can’t keep a straight face to save my life so that wasn’t happening). They actually wake up another girl who is not in on it but realizes pretty quick what is happening and plays along. The girl we were trying to trick is about to call her mom in a panic and see if she was taken when we all pile out of the room to stop her.

Many laughs were had, the rest of the hall was awakened by our shenanigans and they finally had the fire drill.

Then like a week later, a group of guys tried it on there hall and filmed it but that kid lost his mind when he thought he had been left and we were banned from ever doing something like that again :<. “

3. That’s a lot of alarms

“My freshman year of college I got caught in the shower every fire alarm and drill like clockwork. The first couple of times was kinda funny, I put on my pjs still wet and with shampoo in my hair but laughed it off, by the 3rd time I started to revolt.

It was 11 at night and it went off, I started screaming and me and my RA fought through the door with me trying to convince her to let me stay cause “the fire can’t get me in the shower.” Didn’t fly. The fourth time I just came out in my thinnest towel since this was a Christian school and I wanted to make everyone else feel awkward, I was fine.

By the fifth time the RD told my RA she could start warning me before hand. I managed to stay out of the shower during fire drills after that but we had a tornado warning one morning and when my RA came to wake me up I told her just to charge me the 100 dollars for staying in bed. She made me get up and I laid in the basement in my blanket cocoon till I had to leave for my chem ll exam.

My second year I roomed with the RA so I never had to worry about it, though she did have to stop me a few times from jumping in the shower right before one happened. My junior year I just straight up told the RD I would leave the apartment naked if she didn’t give me some warning. I think we only had like 2 that year though.”

4. The culprit

“First week of freshman year of college in my dorm, I tried to drunkenly smoke a cigarette while taking a dump one night, but ended up passing out mid-smoke and somehow ignited the toilet paper roll enough that it smoldered and set off a smoke detector, which triggered the fire alarm for the whole building. It was not one of my finer moments.”

5. Not a false alarm

“I once woke up to a fire alarm in college. Kind of. Exhausted I wake up and think
“F*ck it, it’s probably a false alarm.”

A minute later I smelled smoke so I sat up, but then decided “nah I’m going to bed” and actually went back to bed. In the morning I found out there was a big ass garbage can on fire in the room next to me.

Boy was I tired during college.”

6. F that

“During my first week of college the fire alarm went off and the RA in one of the sections skipped checking the rooms. They left a deaf kid behind. Luckily, it was only burnt popcorn and no one was hurt, but we all had to stand outside in the pouring cold rain and the whole dorm was lectured on how we had to leave.

It wasn’t until it started to storm that they let us back in over an hour later.”

7. Priorities

“So we had firedrills every term in my dorms. However, nobody was informed of the first one because they wanted to make sure we were on our toes. I was having a pretty bad time in the restroom, I forgot what I ate that day. Whilst struggling, the alarm went off.

My first thought was, “Sh!t I have to go right now!”

But then I thought, “I’ll have to skip cleaning up and meet up with my hallmates outside with a messy brown canyon in my pants.”

It was a pretty compelling thought. So I decided to take a capital L by staying and cleaning up, all while the alarms blared and flashed. I lived on the top floor, mind you.

Ultimately, if I died, I wanted everybody I knew to know that I died with a pristine crack.”

8. That dab

“In college, the fire alarm went off in my dorm at 6ish AM. Less than half the building actually left, and a bunch of people took the elevator. Everyone thought it was a fire drill so they either kept trying to sleep, kept showering or kept pooping. Turns out it was a fire drill, and the fire marshal that triggered it was super pissed. The school got in trouble because they were “responsible for our safety”, and started doing fire drills regularly. That made people even less inclined to get up for it, but there was no real punishment they could dole out.

Eventually, one kid lit his room on fire with a mini torch when heating his dab, and only about 1/4 of the building evacuated. Once the fire trucks arrived everyone started pouring out, but a few kids had to be treated for smoke inhalation.

After that everyone exited the building when the alarm went off, for about 6 months.”

9. Another toilet tale

“I was in University and I was on the toilet at the time the fire alarm went off in the dorm. At first I panicked a bit, then I quickly wiped the worst of the mess away, flushed and evacuated. We were supposed to gather across the street from the dorm but I went straight to the nearby dining hall and finished my business in the bathroom there.”

10. Stuck in the shower

“I was mid shower in a communal shower in college. I was an RA at the time and it was my job to open all of my residents doors and make sure they were empty. Then get out myself. I had about 10 rooms to check.

I grabbed my towel and with shampoo in my hair bolted as quickly I as could out of the shower. The look on one guys face when I opened his door was priceless. I then got to stand outside in my towel and sudsy hair while the fire department did their thing. Turns out a microwave caught fire.

My Residential Director thought it was hilarious, and commended me at our next meeting for doing my job under such circumstances. I was mortified.”

11. Polar vortex

“I have one from swim season too, but I wasn’t on the toilet. Let me preface that I live in ny and this happened around the time of the polar vortex that came through a few years ago.

Us being a knuckleheaded group of high school guys, we spent the 30 minutes between am practice and school starting mainly enjoying the hot showers and joking around. The juniors and seniors on the team decided to mystify us younger teammates and show us what happens when you throw open the emergency exit to an athletic field at 5 degrees farenheit and knee deep snow.

It turns out that, when dry, cold air from outside meets 80 degree shower air inside, the exceptional humidity inside condenses into steam. As in, can’t see from one side to the other in an 8 foot by 12 foot room.

Long story short, we set off the freaking fire alarm at 6:50 am on a winter morning, and our coach gave us 5 minutes to peel off our wet spandex, throw on real clothes and file our soggy asses out beside the building.

Lucky for us, the coach guessed pretty quickly what happened and neglected to share the precise details with the administration, with a subtle jab at us about how we wouldn’t want to be standing out there again.”

12. Good thing they were professional

“I was once in the bathroom at work taking a dump when we had a tornado drill. The bathrooms were one of the designated shelters, and of course the shelter closest to my department to boot. I finished up and walked out in what I hope was a nonchalant way only to see all my co workers including the guy I was crushing on. They were all very cool and professional about it luckily.”

13. That’s unfortunate

“I was in the middle of dying my hair in, like, February when an engineering student caught his microwave on fire while making popcorn. Stood outside as long as I could bear with my scalp burning, walked to a friend’s dorm to rinse and ended up just staying the night there instead of heading back. Dorm didn’t really try to account for all residents, just that no one was still inside.”

14. Doc’s office

“I was at the Dr office once and the fire alarm went off. My doc was in a mixed use building so there were all kinda of businesses and was across from the local mall. Right after my appointment finished the alarm went off. When we got to the designated evac zone, one girl was in the middle of getting highlights or her hair dyed, another was in the process of getting shampoo. I felt so bad for them as it took over an hour before they were let back into the building.”

15. Traumatic memory

“Happened to me in kindergarten. I’ll never forget it. We were told what to do when you were IN CLASS, but never what to do when you’re in the middle of peeing. Terrified, I just got my kindergarten self together and ran as fast as I could out of the bathroom…tried to find my class…refused to use the school bathroom for months.”

The post 15 College Students Tell Their Most Unforgettable Fire Alarm Stories appeared first on UberFacts.

12+ History Teachers Share their Favorite Thing to Teach Their Students

Teachers have to teach the same material over and over year after year…so you better like what you’re teaching!

AskReddit users who work in the history field share the facts they love sharing with people.

1. A long piece

“The longest piano piece of any kind is Vexations by Erik Satie.

It consists of a 180-note composition which, on the composer’s orders, must be repeated 840 times so that the whole performance is 18 hours 40 minutes.

Its first reported public performance in September 1963, in the Pocket Theater, New York City, required a relay team of 10 pianists. The New York Times critic fell asleep at 4 a.m. and the audience dwindled to 6 masochists. At the conclusion, one sado-masochist shouted ‘Encore!’ “

2. That’s why it’s there

“The Pentagon wasn’t built that way for any defense reason — in fact, it’s not even a regular pentagon. It was designed to fit nicely into the empty field between five major roads, but then later there was some reason why they had to build it somewhere else, I think it was too close to some city or something. Anyway they’d already paid someone to design this five-sided building so they just said forget it, it’s a pentagon now.”

3. Need those hats

“Notorious Pirate/Pirate hunter Benjamin Hornigold Once attacked a ship just to steal all of the crew member’s hats. His men had gotten drunk and lost their hats during a party the night before and decided to board a ship to get replacements.”

4. Badass

“I love sharing the story of Deborah Sampson. She was effectively the American Mulan. During the Revolutionary War she masqueraded as a man to fight. While she did eventually get caught after being wounded, she managed to avoid that issue once by digging a musketball out of her thigh! She was the only woman following the war to receive a soldier’s pension. Awesome.”

5. Orphan trains

“I like telling people about orphan trains. During the late 19th-early 20th century, Progressive reformers loaded “orphans” onto trains, sending them to the countryside for what often amounted to indentured servitude. Also, some of the kids that were targeted were not orphans, and the Protestant reformers may have intentionally targeted the children of intact Catholic and Jewish immigrant families to make sure they were converted to the right religion. I’ve found that it’s not a very well known part of the Progressive Era.”

6. The long war

“There once existed an alleged theoretical state of war that lasted 335 years and 19 days, and was between the Dutch and an archipelago off the coast of southwest England called the Isles of Scilly.

What’s more, there were no casualties (because the Dutch forgot that they were at war with the Isles).

It wasn’t until a Scilly historian contacted the Dutch about the “war” in 1985, and received the information that the “war” was still technically ongoing, that a peace treaty was signed in 1986.”

7. WWII

“From the memoirs of a Bill Bellamy, a British WW2 tank troop commander:

One of our favorite pursuits was to eavesdrop on other squadron wireless nets while we were resting. This could be very exciting and, on occasion, very amusing.

One splendid moment occurred when C squadron were out on a standing patrol and Michael Payne, a young and popular troop leader, was in a hedgerow with shelling taking place to his front. Apparently the whole area was covered with cattle, who paid little attention to the lethal objects dropping around them and concentrated on the job in hand.

Suddenly over the air came the laconic voice of Mickey,

“Gunner, you see that poor cow in front which has just been wounded? Put the poor devil out of its misery will you?”

He obviously imagined he was talking on his intercom and not broadcasting to the world, because he then remained on the air with his microphone switch pressed. There was a moment of silence and then a rat-tat-tat of the Besa machine-gun. Then came Mickey’s agonized cry,

“Not that one you bloody fool, the one on the left!”

We didn’t let him forget that for a long time.”

8. That didn’t happen

“Despite being one of the most fearsome pirates of all time, Blackbeard never tortured or killed any of his prisoners.”

9. This is great

“Andrew Jackson had a pet parrot with a surprisingly large knowledge on swear words.”

10. That would’ve been strange

“That the US was one single vote away from introducing hippos into the Everglades.

The American Hippo Bill of 1910 was made to solve both a meat shortage and the issue of an invasive species of water hyacinth. The bill went to Congress, and we were one vote short of having the North American Hippopotamus, and adding one more thing to the Everglades that wants you dead.”

11. This is awesome

“Melbourne was once terrorised by a crime gang that consisted exclusively of men with one leg and crutches. ““The Crutchy Push, with one exception, consisted of one-legged men. The exception was a one-armed man who kept half a brick in his sewn up empty sleeve. He led his followers into battle swinging the weighted sleeve around his head. Behind him came the men on crutches – each one expert at balancing on one leg. The tip of the crutch was used to jab an opponent in the midriff. With the enemy gasping for breath the crutch would be reversed and the metal-shod arm rest would be used as a club.”

It gets better. After several incidences of their member outrunning cops sent to track them down, the police got together the ten most violent police officers in Australia, called them “The Terrible Ten” and sent them to beat up the Crutchie Push with hoses, because Australia is clearly one giant Carry On movie.”

https://www.melbournehistoricalcrimetours.com/melbourne-historical-crime-tours-blog/valentine-keating-and-his-north-melbourne-gang-the-crutchy-push-c1900

12. Good ol’ Ben

“The founding fathers wouldn’t let Benjamin Franklin work on the Declaration Of Independence because they were afraid he would slip a joke into it.”

13. What a job

“Some Egyptian pharaohs had a court physician with the title Shepherd of the Royal Anus who had the sole job of keeping the royal butthole healthy.”

14. Not a good rate

“In 1847, Robert Liston performed an amputation in 25 seconds, operating so quickly that he accidentally amputated his assistant’s fingers as well. Both patient and assistant later died of sepsis, and a spectator reportedly died of shock, resulting in the only known surgical procedure with a 300% mortality rate.”

15. Oops

“The US Air Force came dramatically close to detonating an atom bomb over North Carolina that would have been much more powerful than the device that devastated Hiroshima.”

The post 12+ History Teachers Share their Favorite Thing to Teach Their Students appeared first on UberFacts.

15 Foster Kids Reveal What They Wish Their Foster Parents Had Done Differently

Foster parents have the opportunity to make the rough and confusing experience of foster care a little bit easier for the kids who enter into their homes.

In this AskReddit article, foster kids share what their foster parents and families could’ve done differently.

1. Terrorized

“The first foster home that I was in, they had adopted daughters and the older one of the two would constantly terrorize Me by hitting me in the head and pulling my hair and pushing me and just all kinds of terrible stuff. And her younger daughter saw it and even went with me to the Foster mother and backed up my claims of what was happening but she still had me shipped off to another foster home and when she sat me down right before I left and asked me do you know why I’m having you moved? I said no and she said because I can’t have you telling lies about my daughter.

I said I’m not lying and she said well I think you are. Well I never saw her again thank God. I also wish that they knew terrifying it is to be away from home no matter how bad your home situation was. And to live with the knowledge that just as you start to get comfortable and get used to your living situation you can be moved at a moment’s notice. Also how hard it is to have to constantly switch schools and make new friends and try to keep up with the old ones. And to have your things thrown in a garbage bag in a quick move. It makes you feel like you’re worthless and that you’re garbage and that no one will ever really love you like they love their own children.”

2. Time to move on

“My third foster parent said to me that she would care more if the family dog or a stranger on the street got hit by a car and died than if I did. I think it was in the context of telling me her kid was priority. I was removed from that home a bit later.

I choose not to give that woman power over me anymore, either through anger or pain. But for a long time it sucked. She was a teacher at the school I continued to attend as well…

The great thing is we get to move on and choose not to be miserable people like they were.”

3. Conversation

“Someone should have asked me questions. Everyone laid back, letting me talk about things if I wanted to bring them up. Only I was never allowed to bring things up before and I thought their lack of questions meant I wasn’t supposed to talk about any of it. So I didn’t. This extended to other areas too. Once my parent’s rights were terminated, for example, I was free for adoption. They thought if wanted to be adopted, I would ask. But I couldn’t ask something like that, there was no way.”

4. Two different experiences

“First family I was placed with, I did not care for. They liked to punish you, and make you sit in your bedroom all day and all night. My sister and I were together at first, then she was causing problems so they put her in another home. Months later my social worker asked if I was happy where I was, I said no. I was about 6-7 at the time.

They put me in a new home, where the family was huge, and everyone was awesome. They wanted to adopt me but my dad took me out after about 3 years cause the state said he had to pay for me or something like that. Then my life went to hell with my step mom, and I spent summers with my foster family because they were loving, caring and just all around good people.”

5. Culture shock

“Try to remember that they were taken away from their homes for a reason, and there might be an enormous amount of “culture shock” for them in a normal household. My first foster family kicked me out for leaving a tissue on the floor and forgetting to replace the toilet paper roll twice in a row. I came from a hoarder crack house with no running water. For the first several years of my life, I had to use a coffee can to do my business and often times all we had to wipe with was old socks that then went into the trash. So… yes I was in the wrong there, but I still think sending me to a group home was a bit of an extreme reaction. In their defense I was their first foster kid though.”

6. Threats

“That threatening to “send me back” when I acted out, was really messed up. Also that I don’t take threats idly, as you found out.”

7. Not good parents

“You didn’t have to beat me with the sticks you broke off the bushes because I didn’t eat the veggies. I never had them before.”

8. Try to understand…

“I wish they had understood that not letting me around other kids (I wasn’t allowed to socialize outside of school), telling me I was a rude kid, and making me stay in a dark room with nothing to do (they owned a mattress store, and when they were working and I wasn’t in school, I was sitting in the storage room on top of the mattresses (don’t worry, they were wrapped)), was really horrible for my health, and I have had lifelong medical issues because of it, which began while I was living there.”

9. Don’t need to

“You didn’t need to lock up the brand name foods from me. You didn’t need to lock me out of the house any time you weren’t home.”

10. A different experience

“Obligatory not me, but my parents fostered probably twenty kids in ten or so years. They treated every kid that came into our home exactly as they treated their legal children: as family. The things we heard about other foster homes was horrific. One memory stands out most: we had siblings, a boy and girl come for a few months after severe abuse and neglect.

About a week in, we discovered that the girl was only eating half her food at mealtimes and hiding the rest in her room for her and her brother, which we learned is common for foster children. They aren’t always sure where their next meal may come from in an unstable home so they stock up just in case. Well my mom gathered her and her little brother up, marched them into the kitchen, opened up the pantry and fridge and told them that they could eat whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted so long as it was eaten in the kitchen or dining room because she wanted to make sure it wasn’t going to go stale or attract bugs in their bedrooms.

I was maybe ten at the time, the kids were seven or eight and six. They both were just stunned and kept asking, “even this? Even these?” And my mom kept assuring them that anything they wanted was theirs to eat whenever they were hungry. Both kids cried and hugged her. I never realized how privileged I was until I saw children crying over cereal and granola bars. They had literally never been in a home where they were able to eat when and what they wanted. She even made sure that they went shopping with her so they could choose foods they liked.

Both kids were significantly underweight when they moved in and when they left to live with family out of state, my mom was thrilled to tell the case worker that they were both now in a perfectly healthy weight range. After that, when we’d have new kids come in, we always gave them a tour and made sure they knew the kitchen would always be open for them. Around half of them were surprised or even shocked and “tested” my parents by eating things at weird hours to make sure my folks were good on their promise. They always were. I guess my point is that there are some things that seem super obvious to people who’ve never been in a dire situation aren’t as obvious to someone coming from a broken place.”

11. Acting out

“My parents had one foster kid whose birth parents evidently made him smash his own toys to bits when he got in trouble. Was a serious wtf for all of us. Kid did something wrong and you had to watch him to make sure he didn’t destroy something. And I am not talking being mad and pummeling it. I mean being quite and weeping while pulling something apart bit by bit. One of the saddest things I have ever witnessed.”

12. Discarded

“I wish they would’ve known that throwing away all of my belongings (multiple times) would cause me to be an adult who can’t even throw away a broken item.”

13. PTSD

“I wish that they would have known how much my PTSD would effect my life for the rest of my life, and would have forced me to do therapy even though I didn’t want to.”

14. My sister

“Obligatory not me, but my sister was in foster care for a long time. My mom became one of her only constants as she was shuffled from foster home to foster home. I call her my sister because that’s what she is to me, but we were never able to adopt her or foster her because though her step mother was abusive, her father was not and because of our connection to her and the fact that her father would have to sign over his parental rights, law wouldn’t allow it, and neither would he.

I think the thing that stuck out most to me is that a lot of foster parents gave up easily. If a child was difficult in the first month to two months, they’d pass them on. Not to mention, my sister had been placed in homes with 6 or more children living in a double wide or the like with little to no supervision while the foster parents took the checks and used them for themselves. There is so little oversight, and too few foster parents, kids are conditioned to believe they are numbers rather than people to their homes. The best foster homes my sister was placed in were the ones where they took their job seriously as a parent and understood the time it takes to gain trust.”

15. Need a mom/dad

“I lived in foster care from ages 2 – 8, this was partially spent in a group home while my biological aunt who legally fought to get custody from my autistic birth mother who was suing the state to get me back (Child protective services took me at age 2 because she almost killed me).

I just wish people realized that not having a parent around whom you could call “mom/dad” was just so incredibly hard. Even if the foster parents tried to do everything right (like my aunt) sometimes a kid is just sad because of the situation and they act out because of it. It’s nothing personal. It’s just a kid going through trauma and the more patience you have the better.”

The post 15 Foster Kids Reveal What They Wish Their Foster Parents Had Done Differently appeared first on UberFacts.