10+ People Who are Clueless About How the Female Body Works

If you’ve been on the internet at all, you know that misinformation is an epidemic. Particularly when it comes to sexuality and health, it seems like thousands of people out there skipped their high school health classes altogether.

Oh, sure, everyone thinks they’re an expert. But what they really “know” about female anatomy is horrifyingly, hilariously incorrect. Some think girls pee out of their vaginas. Others think periods are made out of the blood of dead babies. You know, fun stuff like that.

So sit back, relax and laugh.

1. This dude tried to write something snarky on the comment section of an Onion article titled, “Frustrated Gunman Can’t Believe How Far He Has to Drive to Find Nearest Planned Parenthood Clinic.” He became a bigger joke than the article. (via MsManifesto)

Photo Credit: Reddit

2. Redditor _ahsatan started a conversation about female anatomy when they had to explain that you don’t pee out of your clitoris.

I just taught my sister-in-law (26) and my husband (31) that women do not, in fact, pee from the clit. What are the most ridiculous ideas you’ve heard about the female body?

3. thumper5 responded to _ahsatan with a period myth women wish were true.

That you can “hold” your period blood the same way you can hold your pee. I had an incredibly stupid boyfriend once that wouldn’t stop at a gas station on our way someplace because he thought I could just hold it til we got there.

ETA: that women only use one pad/tampon per period. That pads/tampons/etc aren’t necessary hygiene items.

4. Through all the spelling errors and profanity, it seems this woman thinks that vaginas smell because of years of semen building up inside? (via Reddit user lady-linux)

Photo Credit: Imgur

5. wicksa, a labor and delivery nurse, had many stories to share about female anatomy myths that will make you want to campaign for sex-ed in all schools immediately.

Oh, my time to shine! I am an L&D nurse and I hear some weird shit, especially from teen moms.

“My friend told me that if I douched with sprite after having sex, I couldn’t get pregnant.” – 16 year old in labor

“I tried to schedule a c section because my pussy is really tight and I know a baby ain’t gonna fit through there. The doctor wouldn’t let me.” The baby did indeed fit with no assistance (meaning no vaccuum or forceps, a doctor was totally there haha).

5 foot tall 120 lb girl who looks so pregnant it’s like she swallowed a beach ball, hasn’t had her period in 9+ months, is sexually active, shows up to ER with abdominal pains (contractions!): “I didn’t know I was pregnant.”

“I’m not going to breastfeed because I am afraid it will turn me on too much. I like nipple play during sex.”

6. This man tries to correlate the thigh gap to the size of one’s vagina, even though it seems pretty obvious that no one would ever let him near their vag. (via Redditor dustinyo_)

Photo Credit: Reddit

Photo Credit: Reddit

Photo Credit: Reddit

Photo Credit: Reddit

7. Even though this commenter has had given birth to two children of her own, she still does not understand how pregnancy works. (via Gingevere)

Photo Credit: Imgur

I dont think that there is enough space for a baby in there. I’ve had 2 kids and they both liked 2 move around and that wouldn’t have been possible in such a Tiny bell. Everyone carries different but working out like that and leaving your baby with little space is not okay. A baby needs 2 tumble en move around. Dont be selfish and workout hardcore 2 keep super thin.

8. Redditor katiedid05 posted this unsettling screenshot of a teenager condescendingly explaining how the clitoris has to grow ten centimeters before giving birth.

Photo Credit: Someecards

sorry but in childbirth you clitoris will need to grow up to 10cm to actually give birth…thats why they say you need to be 10cm dialated to start pushing…im not even 18 yet and i got that one right :/

9. midnasays found this perplexing meme that tries to slut shame women who prefer to use pads?

Photo Credit: Reddit

10. This poor woman thinks she needs a placenta transplant. (via pleasuretohaveinclas)

Photo Credit: Reddit

11. One time an anti-abortion lawmaker asked why women couldn’t just swallow a camera to expedite the process of getting a gynecological exams. Yes, a man who makes laws said this. (via Huffington Post)

During a debate over an anti-abortion bill, a Republican lawmaker in Idaho asked Monday whether women can just swallow a tiny camera in order to conduct a gynecological exam remotely with a doctor.

According to the Associated Press, Idaho Rep. Vito Barbieri (R) posed the bizarre question to Dr. Julie Madsen, who was testifying against a bill that would ban doctors from prescribing medication abortion via webcam unless they have examined the woman in person. Madsen had to explain to Barbieri that swallowed items, like pills, do not land in the vagina.

12. pizzaoverload shared this comment that they found on a YouTube video where a woman (Chris) announced that she got her period back after years of over-training and dieting.

Chris, I know I am male but I have always had somehow an internal sensing that women’s period is blood that is not up to standard and the body must get rid of it. As well as many females think something is wrong with them when they don’t have a period something tells me if your detoxing well through exercise and clean diet that if the body has clean blood and there is nothing to recycle out you just won’t have a period. Just like a lot of women of little bodyfat. I think a female loses their period because the body is that clean and detoxed. I see it as a good thing if this is the case. If this is the case then most females just are not optimal detoxed and the body has to force it through a period to keep the system clean. What are your thoughts is this possible? With Love JC.

13. In a horrifying true story, a so-called “sexual assault expert investigator” had to be told what a cervix was in court.

In the reinvestigation of the case of Kelli Smith, a young driver who killed a father of two while driving the wrong way down a one way street, it was discovered that the woman may have been slipped a date rape drug which caused the accident. Although initially there was no investigation into a possible rape, it was discovered that the woman sustained injuries to her cervix and was found at the scene of the crime without pants or underwear on. Sexual assault expert investigator Eric Stacks was called in to look into whether or not Smith was raped, which prompted defense attorney Jennifer Bukowsky to ask Stacks about the injury.

Bukowsky: In your experience with car crashes how many times do you see injuries to a cervix?

Stacks: I don’t know what you’re asking me, to a cervix?

Bukowsky: You don’t know what a cervix is?

Stacks: No. explain that to me, please.

14. This person thinks that the menstrual cycle is unnatural, and suggests basically starving yourself to stop it. (via PM_me_a_scary_thing from Reddit)

Photo Credit: Imgur

I mean, what the actual f*** people?

The post 10+ People Who are Clueless About How the Female Body Works appeared first on UberFacts.

Woman Shames Her Engagement Ring on Reddit, Everyone Goes Nuts

Proposing marriage is one of the scariest things someone can do. It’s a moment that’s full of emotions, ideally a celebration of the love between two people. But when the bride-to-be finds the ring before her future fiance can pop the question, and she hates the ring instantly… that certainly complicates things.

Recently, a woman found her engagement ring stuffed into her boyfriend’s nightstand. She then proceeded to post a pic to a ring-shaming group online. The reaction on Reddit was less than sweet, and maybe for good reason…

The woman offered up a roast and an “EWWWWW” and asked Reddit users how to “tactfully say no” because she wanted something different. I think we passed “tactfully” the moment this picture was posted.

 

Photo Credit: Reddit.com

Reddit users spun out in different directions, from offering advice:

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Or lightening the mood:

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To defending her:

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While a majority tore her apart:

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Photo Credit: Reddit.com

Photo Credit: Reddit.com

It probably goes without saying, this marriage will be off to a “rock”-y start.

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Man on Twitter Claims “Unnatural” Hair Colors Are a Red Flag, Gets Instantly Roasted

So, Twitter is a place where anyone can express their opinions about anything. And they do. All the time.

One user, Alexander A.J Cores, had some opinions about women’s hair colors.

Photo Credit: Twitter

It was a position he felt pretty strongly about.

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He even gave some scientific evidence.

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I mean, think of the poor, impressionable young men who might be led astray by multi-colored hair.

Photo Credit: Twitter

Oh, Alex, who hurt you?

Obviously, I’m not putting up with this nonsense. Thankfully, neither was Twitter.

Here are a few of the best responses:

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

This is a little petty, but…

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And this t-shirt says it all:

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Of course, if you wander through Cortes’ timeline, you’ll also find this:

Photo Credit: Twitter

Not only are Cortes’ comments around hair color close-minded, but his simple dismissal of any women seeing a therapist or taking prescriptions to treat her mental health are problematic too.

Twitter had fun with this guy, but in all seriousness, you do you. Your hair color, your self-care, your therapy, your medication regimen. Whatever gets you through the day and keeps you awesome.

And if you’re feeling down, remember that at least you’re not this guy.

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The first woman to run for President…

The first woman to run for President of the United States was Victoria Woodhull in 1872, 50 years before women could vote. She had Frederick Douglass as her running mate, and spent election day in jail due to being arrested for obscenity. 00

18+ Women Who Are Killing It on Tumblr

Tumblr is full of funny women…and this list is full of some of their funniest posts.

Enjoy!

1. She will break them

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2. Sad but true

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3. There’s a third option

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4. Uh oh

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5. Thanks bro

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6. That would be nice

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7. Lucifer’s waterfall

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8. Uninstall?

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9. Don’t say that, men

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10. All of ’em

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11. The worst

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12. “Evolution”

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13. Truth bomb

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14. Real talk

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15. Use the men’s room

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16. Imagine…

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17. Won’t take long

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18. See them squirm

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19. Nope

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20. Look at those sexy table legs

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LOL, amirite?

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Between 1907 and 1922, American…

Between 1907 and 1922, American-born women who married non-citizens automatically lost American citizenship. In 1917, hundreds of American women who had married German men were forced to register with the government as ‘enemy aliens’. 00

15 Pick Up Lines That Women Actually Liked Hearing

If you’re a guy (or a woman, for that matter) in the dating world, pickup lines probably go in one ear and out the other. They’re so unoriginal and just plain insulting…at least most of the time. These 15 stories prove that if you’ve got a good line, you could still get the girl.

#15. No.

“Guy – “Hey, you want some good sex tonight?”

Girl – “No”

Guy – “You came to the right place then”

#14. He wasn’t even French.

“It wasn’t use on me but I overheard a conversation between this guy with a heavy French accent and some hurl I front of me in an economics class. I wasn’t really paying attention till I heard him say “Let me take you out for ice cream, you look like you’d enjoy some French Vanilla” and I almost died. She said no, and I later found out he wasn’t even French, just very good at accents.”

#13. A bit of cute.

“You have a bit of cute on your face.”

Apparently this was used by both my bf and one of his friends to his current gf. Both gents got the line from a single friend who is still single.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯”

12. Nice buns

“I don’t like when people hit on me at work, but this one made me chuckle. I’m a baker and I was putting some hamburger buns on the shelf. A guy walked up behind me and said “hey nice buns.” Simple, but I laughed.”

Edit: anyone else want to make the beaver joke? Original, y’all.”

#11. You dropped something.

“Guy: Hey, you dropped something.

Girl: What?

Guy: Your standards. My name’s _______”

#10. You look like a cab driver.

“I was a security guard for Seahawks games, and we had to wear yellow jackets, black caps, and black slacks.

At the end of the game, we were going through and clearing out all the drunk people and this one guy I was helping to the door looked at me up and down and said “You look like a cab driver….you should take me home” and then winked at me. Told him it was a great line and to use it on someone else.”

#9. Worth it.

“My first kiss was with my best friend at the time in middle school. He bet me a quarter that he could kiss me without touching my lips. I thought he was just going to kiss my cheek or hand or something and say I owed him a quarter, but he really kissed me, pulled a quarter out of his pocket, pressed it in my hand and said ‘worth it.’”

#8. I think you’re doing it wrong.

“Sitting in a cafe doing homework. I hear a guy go, “I’m not trying to be weird, I’m just trying to figure out what kind of math you’re doing, because I think you’re doing it wrong.” He was right and helped me out. Asked me out in a date afterwards and we’re been together 7 years, married almost more than half of that.”

#7. She saw an opportunity.

“I was at a skating rink and this girl fell right in front of me and said “I think I’ve fallen for you.* Idk if she saw an opportunity and took it or was serious, but I don’t swing that way… sorry.”

#6. Until I got to the car.

“I was walking out of a book store when a guy told me I had dropped something. I looked at the floor thinking I had dropped a receipt or something. The guy then replies “my jaw”. My dumbass didn’t realize it until I got to the car.”

#5. Incredible charmed.

“Had a paraplegic guy roll up to me and tell me ‘I’m 6’4” layin’ down’. I was incredibly charmed.”

#4. Hi, my name is John.

“Hi my name is John if anyone is looking to make a mistake tonight.” I wasn’t, but damn I thought that was funny.”

#3. I’m more into titans.

“At a nerd convention some guy asked if I wanted to see his giant robot. My brain didn’t compute I was being hit on, I thought we were talking about anime so I responded “I’m more into titans.”

#2. We’re married.

“Hey, you’re beautiful. Can I tell you that again next saturday over dinner?”

Lol maybe cheesey but I guess it worked because we’re married.

Edit:

They want a haiku,

I suppose I should write one.

But I’m so lazy.”

#1. Good fortune.

“I was working at a sushi restaurant in a small Texas town. I was serving a group of 3, a couple and their friend. So at the end of the meal the lonely guy (one may call him a neck beard or one of those nice guy types) asks if will open fortune cookies with them. In my head, I’m thinking I hope this gets me a a decent tip.

I open my cookie and it has some generic fortune. I ask him what his says. He replies without missing a beat: “my says the cute waitress will give me her number”. I giggled and politely decline saying I have a boyfriend.

It was one of the smoothest pick lines I’ve ever seen used but also from the least likely of people.”

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10 Tumblr Posts to Take with You As You Obliterate the Patriarchy

As if you need more inspiration to get out there and smash the patriarchy, I know. But keep these 10 posts for those days when you need a bit of a recharge because they’re definitely going to do the trick!

#10. Asterisk FTW.

Photo Credit: Tumblr

#9. Opinions are the worst.

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#8. Boob pockets. Lol.

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#7. Yes. Yes, it is.

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#6. Universal Austen Truths.

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#5. I mean really.

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#4. Fear the boob monolith!

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#3. That moment when…

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#2. Yes, exactly like that.

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#1. Burnnnnn.

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15+ PMS Tweets That Only the Ladies Will Understand

Ladies, this article is for you, and you only.

Men might think they understand, but trust me, we don’t know anything about your PMS struggles.

So it’s time to laugh and learn.

1.

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Women Share the Best, Non-Creepy Way for Men to Approach Them

All the men out there need to listen and listen good!

This advice from AskReddit is coming STRAIGHT FROM THE LADIES, so you know it’s legit.

So if you want to meet some women (and have them respond positively), read on and pay attention.

1. A few good pointers

“Approach her in a place where she won’t feel like she’s being cornered. Other people around, casual setting, etc. An empty train car probably isn’t your best bet.

Be friendly and engage in at least minimal small talk before asking her out, for her number, etc. Literally asking 2 seconds into the conversation can be weird, because even if we know your intent right away, you haven’t given us any time to feel out the situation and feel comfortable.

Don’t be demanding. Just ask if she is interested, and do not be forceful about it if she rejects you.

Go in understanding that some women don’t like being approached by strangers, period. You might be good looking, funny, and friendly and she still might be uncomfortable or uninterested

I know this is hard to execute in practice, but just don’t be too weird about it. Don’t treat her like a foreign species or a piece of meat, just like a normal person.”

2. Timing

“Wait until you’re in a place where it’s appropriate. Bar, coffee shop if she doesn’t have headphones in or is reading. Ask if you can join her. Talk about something interesting.”

3. Take a hint

“If this is someone you see regularly, smile. If she returns the smile, say hi.

Let the conversation flow.

Do take a hint if she’s not interested.”

4. Short and sweet

“Whether she is someone you see frequently or not I suggest being short and sweet. Obviously get to know her a little so you’re not complete strangers, but you should give that no more than 5-10 min and leave it off with asking for her number and then proceed to text her the next day and ask her out if you still want to. Don’t ask her anything super personal but find out what she likes to do around town and use that as a way to help you ask her out.

From my experience, I get so annoyed when a guy just wont leave and basically turns our first time we meet into a date, so definitely don’t overstay your welcome.”

5. Body language

“Every person is different and can’t be approached the same way, but the one thing across the board is pay attention to whether or not you think she WANTS to be approached. If they have headphones in at all, what their body language is telling you (not making eye contact, turned away, etc), if they’re busy and trying to get something done.

It makes the difference between me categorically ignoring you and also being annoyed or possibly even scared depending on context, or at the very least making friends.

And if you are rejected for any of those reasons or different ones, just remember that you or anyone else don’t have the right to someone’s time and attention just because you want it. Don’t take it personally and move on and leave her alone.”

6. Dos and don’ts

“The guys I remember the most fondly had very casual conversation starters and transitioned smoothly into asking my name. Don’t start with “Hey, I’m so and so” or “What’s your name?” It catches me so off guard.

Try mentioning something that doesn’t have to do with her specifically. When you approach me, I’m trying to assess the situation, determine if you’re dangerous, examine my surroundings, and figure out what your intentions are. I don’t want to be doing all of this while answering questions about myself, even if it’s just my name.

Also, read that body language. Make a little eye contact and smile. And then read her body language and make sure she’s not already creeped out or on guard.

For instance, if you’re in line at Target or something, smile and read her body language. Then mention something about your surroundings or the store: “I always come in here for a specific thing and end up leaving with 30 things I didn’t need and forget the one thing I came here for.” Every girl at Target can sympathize with that. If she doesn’t say anything, don’t push it. She’s not into it. If she seems good with the conversation, just make small talk in line and then give her your number.

NEVER FOLLOW HER OR WAIT FOR HER IN THE PARKING LOT. That is creepy. We are constantly told how dangerous parking lots are so you immediately come off as a threat.”

7. No confrontation

“Don’t corner or confront them. Don’t ask personal information off the bat. Compliment their outfit, hair, makeup, or something they have control over and not their body or face (don’t objectify). If they they’re doing something (reading, listening to music, shopping, etc.) leave them alone. If they ignore you, leave them alone. Realize that they probably get unwanted attention all day long and might not want to talk.”

8. Friendly

“Don’t approach them as someone you are interested in, approach them as someone you want to make friends with. Start with “hello” or a wave, and then try making a friend. If you don’t want to make a friend, you are not worth getting to know.”

9. Complimentary

“Approach her casually in a public place and compliment something she has control over (i.e. clothes, hair, makeup, etc) and use words like “cool” “awesome” or “rad”. Nobody is intimidated by compliments like that.

Also if someone isn’t interested, just accept it and respect their space. There is no excuse to bother someone in their own time if they aren’t interested.”

10. Don’t force it

“I hate when men come up to me and say “hi, what’s your name? I just wanted to introduce myself…blahblahblah”. It’s fine but that has never resulted in me having an awesome connection or giving my number out. It just feels forced. Like I know we haven’t met, that’s why your introducing yourself. Be confident. If you notice she’s watching the game say “oh don’t tell me you like the xyz team” or if she has an interesting looking drink ask her what it is. If she’s looking at the menu tell her they make killer nachos. If she doesn’t want to talk, she won’t. If she’s interested you’ll start talking and at the first lull that’s when you can tell me your name/ask me mine/etc. I don’t want to hear the standard question list. Show me you can actually talk to me and you’re fun to be around.”

11. Mutual interests

“Striking up a conversation about a mutual interest sometimes works. The thing is you have to be genuine. Strange guys approach single women all the feckin’ time and feign interest when the real message is, you’re good enough; I’d do you.

Take an interest in her personality, in her tastes. Relate to her as a human being. She may shut you out for any of a thousand reasons and she doesn’t owe you an explanation, but once in a while a woman might decide that you seem fun and interesting.

That being said, women tend to be less on guard when there’s an introduction through mutual friends or if the two of you belong to the same club.”

12. Don’t change a thing

“Honestly? the same way you would approach a dude you simply wanted to have a conversation with.”

13. Give her space

“If I am on the street, just don’t approach me. Period. I live downtown and I have received death threats after engaging with strangers.

Make your introduction light, and if shes not feeling after a couple of seconds, wish them a good day and leave. If you are engaged with a women for at least 30 seconds and shes not feeling it, I guarantee shes has thought of an exit strategy already.

Give her space to talk, so if she does want to leave, she doesn’t have to wait for you to finish speaking or interrupt you.

Just giving a woman freedom to leave a situation makes a huge difference really.”

14. Remember these words

“Don’t forget this quote:

“Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them.” “

15. Don’t be a gnat

“Also, if it’s out in public, bear in mind she’s probably on her way to do something- going to work, meeting a friend, trying to catch a train, making an appointment, etc… so if she ignores you or brushes you off, it might not be you, specifically. I’m often harried when I’m out and about, or otherwise very focused on what I’m trying to get done, and a random person trying to talk to me is more like a gnat buzzing around my ear.

I might not even really notice someone is trying to talk to me until 10-20 seconds later, and I’ve already walked off. I’ve been called all manner of horrible things because I more or less ignored someone trying to talk to me. Well, I’m not going to turn around and talk to you NOW. Remember that she’s not there purely for your benefit, so be polite.”

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