Category: tweets

Posted on

Hiliarious Text Conversations That Just Hit Different

My favorite thing about text conversations is that they just never go away if we don’t want them to.

We can immortalize them, not just through the various built-in options our phones have for archiving, but through screenshots, the quickest way not just to save a moment of conversation but to spread it far and wide across the internet.

Which is what these wonderful souls did when they found themselves within a chat that just did not go like they were expecting. Thanks, Twitter.

15. Fun in the sun

Thanks for clarifying the reason behind funerals, though.

14. Your what?

I like how he’s just being totally straightforward. Like he knows he’s screwed now.

13. Smoke ’em up

Who exactly does your brother live with?

12. The devil within

I really don’t understand you young people and your sensual talk.

11. Coming out

Context really is key.

10. I’ll try

Our bodies don’t stay 20 forever.

9. Wait who?

What kind of games are you playin’ here?

8. A strong personality

This might be the lowest effort I’ve ever seen.

7. The vaccine?

Yeah, sure, that’s what I’m asking.

6. Push notification

These things are getting out of control.

5. Like a virgin

Being stuck for the very first time.

4. The big lie

The one we all tell each other in circles every day.

3. Leave me alone

Where there’s smoke…

2. Giving thanks

I just think they’re neat.

1. It’s in the stars

Bruh you have no idea how exhausting this is about to get.

Man. That is some straight talk right there.

What’s the best conversation you’ve had recently?

Tell us about it in the comments.

The post Hiliarious Text Conversations That Just Hit Different appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

Things That Every Midwesterner Knows to Be True

If you’re from the midwest like me, then there are certain things you just know in your heart.

One thing you definitely DON’T know, though, is where exactly the midwest even is. I mean, where you’re from is part of it, for sure, but the term is kind of slippery.

It’s not like “West Coast,” where there’s a clear criteria test. Does your state touch the Pacific Ocean? Yes? Then it’s part of the West Coast. But “mid” west?

It’s a point of contention according to everyone with whom I’ve ever broached the subject. For the record, the federal government apparently considers the following states to be the “official” midwest: Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, Nebraska, North Dakota, Ohio, South Dakota, and Wisconsin.

It’s a big club. And we all know what’s up. This Twitter account certainly does.

10. The window clean

I could stand out here freezing my fingers off for another hour and be late to work or I could just get in my warm car and risk it all.

9. The wind

It’s really the only thing that matters.

8. The culture

In Missouri you need to replace that last picture with a QuikTrip.

7. The time

Would ya just look at it?

6. The snacks

The last one is called “puppy chow.”
I don’t know why, I wish it weren’t true, but that’s how it goes.

5. The cows

If you drive by cows and don’t say the word “cows” then I’m going to have to assume you’re physically incapable of speech.

4. The summer 60

It really is the perfect temperature.

3. The scream

And in that moment you question everything that has brought you here.

2. The wiper trick

It helps a little?

1. The “salads”

Somehow they have more calories than the burger.

Ope, looks like it’s about that time!

What’s the most midwestern thing you’ve ever done?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Things That Every Midwesterner Knows to Be True appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

Learn About Tricks Employees Use in Dealing with Customers

I once worked at a country club with some wealthy members.

The official unofficial policy of the club was “you never tell a member no.” Which meant that whatever a member might request, you just told them you were on it and got to work.

Problem was, a lot of the time I either had no idea how to fulfill their particular request or knew for a fact that it couldn’t happen. But since I wasn’t allowed to just tell them that, my main strategy involved hurrying off to “take care of it” and then just kind of wandering around until I could find someone else to pass it off to.

It wasn’t good. That job wasn’t good.

But I’m not alone in finding these work-arounds.

The OP here wasn’t alone either. Because the tweet replies came flooding in.

10. Check in the back

The back is not some magical place, I don’t know what customers think goes on there.

9. It didn’t meet our standards

And we’re ALL about standards.

8. I AM the supervisor

I can be anything I set my mind to.

7. I’m still learning English

That’s a clever one.

6. Sorry, can’t help ya

Shouldn’t they have been trained?

5. I’ve just started

Sometimes, it’s official policy.

4. Keep the training sticker

Don’t ask me, find someone else.

3. The new girl

Not just a show.

2. It’s my birthday

It’s perfect until you start to get regulars.

1. Blessings be upon you

Now that’s a grift.

Maybe use some of those tips in your own life? Couldn’t hurt.

What white lies have you told at work?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Learn About Tricks Employees Use in Dealing with Customers appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

A Man Shared a Creepy Story of a Midnight Snack Gone Wrong

It may not be Halloween quite yet, but it’s always Halloween in our hearts, which means it’s always a good time to revisit this beyond creepy story from a man on Twitter about a childhood midnight snack gone very wrong.

It’s gonna send so many chills down ya that your bones’ bones are gonna be afraid of their own skeletons. What does that mean? I have no idea, I’m just trying to set this up without spoiling anything.

Let’s get to it. Grab a blanket.

Prologue: Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark

Who doesn’t love a little revisited trauma?

Chapter 1: The Sneak

It all begins with a little innocent snacking.

Chapter 2: Mayo Sandwich

Some things are worth the effort.

Chapter 3: The Outline

Here’s where it gets freaky.

Chapter 4: Back Away Slowly

Holy s**t.

Chapter 5: Too Many Horror Comics

Note to self: if my kid ever tells me something like this, listen to them.

Chapter 6: The Hunt

I’d never be able to sleep.

Chapter 7: The Eyes

This just gets worse and worse.

Chapter 8: The Crawl

The truth comes out.

Chapter 9: Drawings

I’d never be ok.

Epilogue: A Little BO

Yikes on bikes.

Well, I’m gonna go take up several new hobbies since I won’t be sleeping ever again for the rest of my life.

What would you do in a situation like this?

Tell us in the comments.

The post A Man Shared a Creepy Story of a Midnight Snack Gone Wrong appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

High School vs. College: Here Are the REAL Differences

I went to a “university model” private high school that had classes Monday, Wednesday, Friday with all other days dedicated to homework. And I mean ALL other days. Pretty much all the hours of all the other days. It was fairly brutal.

Then I went to an actual university. One time while taking a test, halfway through the instructions were to stand up, say “I am Spartacus!” and then sit down again.

We let out early that day.

Twitter knows what I’m talking about.

10. Extra credit

I really gotta hand it to ya for creativity.

9. No joking around

One of these things is not like the others, one of these things just doesn’t belong.

8. Dr. B

In the house with the dad jokes of the century.

7. And I swear

Look, you’re paying to be here, if you choose not to learn anything that’s on you.

6. Park it

There’s never enough parking. Ever ever ever.

5. RIP fish

You need to take time to mourn these losses properly.

4. Straight up

Say no more, fam.

3. Do the slide

“Unless you require a different hook.”

2. The amazing TP!

I think in early 2020 this would have been considered a war crime.

1. At the end of the day

Look man, easy come, easy go, you know what it is.

For anyone who’s headed to college – just remember: it is a lot of fun and your professors will probably be pretty laid back. But that’s because it’s on YOU to do the work. Don’t waste the money slacking off, yo.

Who was your favorite teacher ever?

Tell us in the comments.

The post High School vs. College: Here Are the REAL Differences appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

People Discuss the Differences Between High School and College Teachers

When I was in high school, college was really built up as a place that was going to be super serious. Everything you do here is going to matter there, and it’s going to be TOUGH, so if you can’t hack it in here, you’re never gonna survive a university, and if you don’t survive a university, you’re never gonna be successful.

Turned out, all of that was wrong.

My high school was academically WAY more rigorous than my college, no one ever for the rest of my life cared about my GPA, and despite graduating with honors I managed not to be successful.

So take THAT, high school.

Twitter knows what I’m talking about.

10. Milkduds

They’ve been in my pocket for a while but I think they’re still good.

9. What a drag

In HS you’re just learning the basics of how it’s SUPPOSED to work, in college you learn the horrors of how it actually does.

8. Strict and scary

When you’re in college, you’re literally going into debt to be in that class.
If you wanna slack off, that’s on you, they don’t care.

7. No joke!

And snapping while driving, which is neat.

6. Put it up

Today we’re going to demonstrate the effects of…um…wind on…whatever, just look at this s**t.

5. The bell

Guess we’ll just wrap up early today.

4. Rawr!

We’re traveling back in time!

3. Trail Mix Attack

PS. if this might kill you, maybe take precautions.

2. Prof sick

I mean, I guess in a certain way they kind of ARE?

1. The Amazing Race

But why are they moving like that?

Class dismissed.

Who was the best or worst college professor you ever had?

Tell us in the comments.

The post People Discuss the Differences Between High School and College Teachers appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

Funny Tweets to Make Your Day a Little More Pleasant

I need a bit of pleasantness in my life.

Things have been quite ugly in the world for a while but we’re gonna change that immediately!

We have some tweets for you to look at today that we think are really gonna set your pants on fire with their hilarity.

Do you think you can handle the heat?

We sure hope so! Because we have a feeling you’re gonna start scrolling if you’ve made it this far.

Enjoy!

1. That would not be a fun job.

Darn it, I have to start over…

2. Uh oh…what happened here?

A major break up, that’s what!

3. I never thought about it this way…

This should be a movie.

4. This is very inappropriate!

But…I still laughed.

5. I can see why this couple needs to get divorced.

This would probably get old.

6. Well, that’s a nice way to approach it.

She’s not taking sides.

7. This is amazing.

Teach him some more slang for our sake!

8. I’ve often wondered this…

I’d like to get to the bottom of it.

9. That’s when you know you’re really depressed.

Do you ever do this?

10. A life tip we can all use!

I’m gonna try it soon!

11. You know you had one.

But the question is, do you still have it?

12. Time to come clean.

What really happened out there…?

Now we want to hear from you.

In the comments, please share some funny memes, tweets, photos, or jokes that you’ve seen lately.

We look forward to it!

The post Funny Tweets to Make Your Day a Little More Pleasant appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

Hilarious Tweets We’re Pretty Confident Will Make You LOL

We feel very confident today, amigos.

We believe that we have curated an incredibly strong collection of tweets today for you to enjoy immensely.

And they’re funny, too! So that means you’re gonna laugh, too!

What else could you possibly ask for?!?!

Well, I guess we technically could ask for a bunch of other stuff, but we don’t want to come off as greedy, do we?

So here’s how this is gonna work: you’re gonna sit back, take off your shoes (and your pants, if you want to), kick your feet up, and have some laughs. It’s as easy as that!

1. I’m with you!

It can be hard to stop sometimes…

2. I’ve wondered this my entire life.

Who’s holding everyone up?!?!

3. Hold your breath.

Well, how else are you gonna listen to that conversation?

4. Really blew that one, huh?

Well, you gave it your best shot.

5. I don’t think you’re alone on this one.

Ladies, let’s hear from you!

6. Join the club.

I don’t even like my own family members anymore.

7. Oh, isn’t that sweet?

I thought you were gonna say something else…

8. I’ll go ahead and start.

Well, I’m sorry to hear that.

9. This is a good plan.

It’s called REVENGE.

10. I love a nice father and son relationship.

I love you, Dad!

11. It’s gonna go one of two ways…

Either way will be worth it.

12. That’s very impressive.

I think you just got hired!

Have you seen any hilarious memes lately?

Well, don’t keep them all to yourself!

Share them with us in the comments! Thanks!

The post Hilarious Tweets We’re Pretty Confident Will Make You LOL appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

“Tell Me You Grew Up Poor Without Telling Me You Grew Up Poor.” Here Are the Responses.

America is one of the wealthiest nations on the planet and indeed one of the richest countries in history.

And for a lot of people who’ve lived comfortable lives here, it’s easy to overlook the fact that that wealth is far from even. So many people grow up in a kind of poverty you might not even think feasible in a place like this. But it’s an ultra-common experience.

That’s a conversation that got kicked off by a thread started by actor Trevor Donovan who said:

So, how did the (mostly American) Twitter audience respond? Let’s look at some examples.

10. Kleenex as a luxury

Oh man, especially if you’re actually getting the name brand stuff.

9. The letter present

I mean, that’s going to mean far more to you as you grow older than some quickly forgotten toy would.

8. Out of the tube

For real though, get you one of those little plastic rollers. Does wonders.

7. Fee knowledge

Nobody’s more cost-aware than those who have nothing.

6. Old style food stamps

Wait, whose pictures are on those?

5. When summer came

That’s pretty ingenious, actually.

4. On the cheap

I kinda do too.

3. No such thing as Christmas

Santa has very mixed feelings about this.

2. Bigger than a bread bag

The poor man’s water lining.

1. The bunks

They look like some sweet, happy kids.

We may be rich as a whole, but never forget your neighbors in need.

What’s your ultimate poor experience?

Tell us in the comments.

The post “Tell Me You Grew Up Poor Without Telling Me You Grew Up Poor.” Here Are the Responses. appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

People Talk About Their Ultimate “Broke Food” Experiences

You don’t need me to tell you that it’s not easy growing up poor. Especially if you grew up poor.

My family’s never been wealthy but we did alright. The times when everything was the tightest, I was too young to remember now.

Nevertheless, I’ve had plenty of “broke food” experiences, which is a topic that came up a lot after prolific TV actor Trevor Donovan started this thread:

So, what were we all chowing down on when there was nothing to go around? Twitter tells all.

10. The sugar sandwich

Need the recipe? Bread + sugar. Bon apple teeth.

9. Banquet frozen dinners

Check out that price stamp. Half a buck. Dang.

8. King Vitaman

I don’t know what kind of land you’re ruling, sire, but it definitely isn’t Flavor Town.

7. The flexibility of bread

“I didn’t know I was poor.”

6. Beans and rice

Well that’s…horrifying.

5. Pork and beans sandwiches

Dude, broke or not, that’s a delicious fart treat right there.

4. The cheese preserver

I feel like there are better containers for this but ok.

3. S.O.S.

Who doesn’t love Kool Aid though?

2. A krafty choice

Even adult me who isn’t destitute is lookin’ at that like a fine meal.

1. Government cheese

Everything is better grilled.

Bon apetite!

What’s your go-to broke food?

Tell us in the comments.

The post People Talk About Their Ultimate “Broke Food” Experiences appeared first on UberFacts.