People on Twitter Can’t Understand a Couple Who Claims They Don’t Have a “Side” of the Bed

What kind of monsters don’t have an assigned side of the bed with their partner?

The kind of monsters who are friends with journalist Jeff Stein…

In every couple, there is an unspoken agreement (and nightstand full of crap you rarely need) that sits next to the side of the bed that is “yours.” That’s just the way of things, and it’s the way it should be…except for this one couple who thinks they can just sleep willy-nilly on whichever side of the bed the feel like plopping onto on a given night.

Stein admitted that though it seemed like anarchy to him, maybe there was something to it.

Twitter was on my side, though, and basically thought those people should never speak of their strange bedroom practice again.

Because who would do this?!

It makes no sense!

Do you want chaos to reign in your bedroom?

What’s next? Cannibalism?

There really isn’t excuse for this…

They should be locked up…

Okay, maybe that was a bit extreme.

These are important questions, y’all, and idk maybe we need a follow-up interview or something.

Or maybe there are some things we just don’t want to know details on…

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This Little Girl Wasn’t Impressed by the Birthday Cake That Called Her a “Loser”

To be fair, it takes quite a bit to impress a toddler, so “unimpressed” is kind of their default. That said, you might have a shot with the right, well-executed cake on their birthday.

Which was pretty much the opposite of what mom Melin Jones ended up with when trying to get a cute cake for her daughter Liz’s 2nd birthday party.

Editing this with a little more information -Some of my family & friends know about the cake mess up we had with Liz’s…

Posted by Melin Jones on Sunday, June 30, 2019

Here’s the full text:

Some of my family & friends know about the cake mess up we had with Liz’s 2nd birthday cake but I recently posted it in a Facebook group I’m in (Sad Sales, Stolen Goods, and Sketchy Services )and had a lot of people ask me to post it to my public profile so they could share  it – so here’s the story !

September 7th, sometime in the afternoon I had went to Wal-Mart in Desloge to get things for Liz’s birthday party, which we were having that next day.

We hadn’t ordered a cake or anything days a head like one should /would normally so I swung by the bakery and picked out one that was already made, and asked the lady behind the counter if she would write “Happy Birthday Lizard.”

Lizard is our nickname for Liz. She said yes and within a few minutes she handed it back.

She didn’t ask me how it looked and I didn’t check .

Remember, I’m in a hurry here as it’s the day before her birthday party and I’m just now picking the cake out and getting everything else.

Little did I know life lessons were about to be had! We get home, I’m unloading the car and quickly glance down at the cake and noticed that the worker wrote Loser , not Lizard . At first I was a little shocked and speechless but quickly started dying laughing.

I hurried and carried the cake and Liz into the house, put the cake down on the table and put Liz in the chair to send a picture to my husband of the cake .

Liz wasn’t told to look at the cake, she can’t read so she didn’t know what the cake said, we didn’t tell her what it said and she doesn’t even know what a loser is. She just happen to be looking at the cake when I took the photo.

My husband and I laughed about it together when he got home, enjoyed every bit of the loser cake (eat up , mom of the year ! you deserve it !) and later that evening I made another trip to Wal-Mart for another cake for her party.

I never brought it to the bakery’s attention because had I took the time to just look at the cake when she handed it to me I would have never walked out the door with it and also , I didn’t want her to get into any type of trouble or be mocked by her coworkers for writing loser on a child’s birthday cake .

It was a simple misunderstanding and I didn’t want her to get any backlash from it .

This is a funny story , it’s ok to laugh . Lizard got a new cake, the idiot that couldn’t be bothered to take a few mins to stop and check it also got a cake.

I promise you my now almost 3 year old didn’t have a clue what happen. She’ll go on to live a somewhat normal life….. as long as someone else starts picking out her birthday cakes.

The good news is that Liz can’t read, so even though she looks un-enthused, she “wouldn’t know what a loser is,” her mom told the Mirror back in 2018.

Editing this with a little more information because some of the news stations have really butchered it & have false…

Posted by Melin Jones on Sunday, June 30, 2019

She also said that while the cake might have called their daughter a loser, the family was the winner.

Because the cake was delicious!

Posted by Melin Jones on Monday, July 1, 2019

“I ate every bit of that loser cake,” Melin told People magazine.

Proof that happy endings do exist, my friends!

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These Posts Will Make Perfect Sense If Your Partner Is a Snorer

Okay, confession time: I am a snorer. And the ironic part: I lose my mind when I’m sleeping in the same room with someone else who snores.

But it doesn’t seem to bother some people at all. I have a friend who said she likes it because it’s soothing. Soothing.

Oooookay, what planet are you from again?

Anyway, if you have to deal with a snorer in your life, these posts will look very, very familiar.

1. Bragging rights

2. Great…

3. The Six Stages

4. Last night’s count was…

5. Ugh

View this post on Instagram

#mood? #boyfriendstuff #snoringboyfriend #memes?

A post shared by Liz Getz (@liz_getz) on

6. It’s over

7. Futuristic

8. Sexy

9. STFU

10. Still love him, though

11. That’s hot

12. Drowsy

13. Let me sleep, please

14. Hahahaha

15. Me? No…

Good night and good luck.

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If You’re a True Crime Junkie, These Tweets Are for You

True crime TV shows are more popular than ever right now. Everyone and their mother is obsessed with the latest shows about murder, mayhem, and the macabre.

So in the spirit of all this true crime hoopla, let’s take a look at some hilariously accurate tweets about these television programs.

1. Weirdos

2. STOP

3. Dead as a doornail

4. In a trance

5. You can’t come in

6. Ellen!

7. Three types

8. The new thing

9. All the good stuff

10. Hahaha

11. We don’t believe you

12. That’s all you need

13. You got my attention

14. No clue

15. WAY too much time left

I have to admit…I am one of these people…

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Four Loko Has a New Hard Seltzer Coming out Soon – Here Are Some of the Best Reactions from People Online

What a time to be alive!

Four Loko is getting in on the increasingly popular hard seltzer game and people are all kinds of worked up about it.

And the Four Loko folks are even being kind of cocky about it. When they made their announcement, they tagged a bunch of other seltzer companies just so they knew there was a (potential) new sheriff in town.

Photo Credit: Instagram

And Four Loko isn’t messing around. The new hard seltzer has 14% alcohol content while the popular White Claw only has 5%.

Let’s take a look at what people online think about this development.

1. Uh oh

2. Tears

3. Now I remember…

4. You know you will

5. Fired up

6. This might be rough

7. How bad can it be?

8. You got that right

9. In love again

10. Pretty much

11. Let’s just take it slow

12. A deadly game

13. Dear God, no!

14. Yes, they should…

15. Amen

I’m ready to give this a shot and see what kind of JOLT it gives me.

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15 People Who Texted Their “Number Neighbors” Share the Results – Good and Bad

This is important, so pay attention.

Do you know about this whole “number neighbor” phenomenon? It’s when you text someone who has a phone number just like yours but one digit off, and then you see what happens!

Well, it’s here, people like it, and you should jump on board.

Because the results are pretty hilarious.

1. This one started it all

2. Hey, that’s a win!

3. I believe in you

4. BFF

5. That’s how it’s supposed to work

6. Homies

7. That’s random

8. That was quick

9. Seems like a classy guy

10. BLOCKED

11. Uh oh

12. Unsettling

13. I wasn’t aware…

14. Goodbye

15. Let’s end on a high note

I’m gonna dial up my number neighbor this instant!

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These People All Found Weird Stuff in the Woods and Just Had to Share It

Creeeeeeeeeepy.

The deep, dark woods. You never know what you’re gonna get out there in the forest, do you? Could be a strange animal, a masked madman (hopefully not), or just something unsettling that you can’t explain.

All of these folks encountered weird stuff out there, and they shared their photos with the world.

1. That’s kinda sweet

Found this in the woods while trail riding from pics

2. A portal?

Found this in the woods today from pics

3. Another dimension?

Me and my girlfriend were walking in the woods the other week and saw a rainbow pool for the first time from pics

4. Don’t go in there

Abandoned Russian house found in the woods from creepy

5. Trippy

Standing in a huge pond that sinks every dry season from mildlyinteresting

6. Demon tree

This tree I found hiking looks like a forest monster watching over you. from mildlyinteresting

7. That is crazy

I went for a walk in the forest and came upon this ponderosa pine tree that had been struck by lightning. I called the Forest Service and they eventually extinguished it, but not before I had time to get some photos. Near Flagstaff, Arizona, USA. [OC] [2834×2000] from EarthPorn

8. Hmmm

Found this sword in epping forest , England .anyone have any idea on what the history is ? from metaldetecting

9. Lead the way

This stick I found looks like a burning torch, flame included! from mildlyinteresting

10. Mossy boot

This moss covered boot found in the woods. from mildlyinteresting

11. That’s odd

*shhh* it’s a flock of wild toilets roosting from WTF

12. That’s a lot of dishware

I was driving through the back roads of Pennsylvania on the way to a camping spot and found a mountain of ceramic dishes and tea cups in the middle of the woods!?…. from WTF

13. Do not enter

Abandoned train tunnel we found in the woods from AbandonedPorn

14. WTF is it?

Moved to Wisconsin. Found this in the woods! from pics

15. Scary

What my parents found on their hike from pics

16. Ghost tree

So I was walking in a forrest near my city and found this

17. Explosive

My brother found this (missile?) in the woods in Tennessee from whatisthisthing

18. Who you gonna call?

Found this phone booth in the middle of the woods from mildlyinteresting

19. Holy sh*t

View post on imgur.com

20.

Friend found this while hiking the Connecticut wilderness from pics

Beware!

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These 15 Memes Define 2019…So Far

That’s right! We’ve reached the point in Internet saturation where memes define our times – and you can’t live through 2019 and not nod and laugh at these 15, because they’re totally on point.

15. No one has all five.

14. We’re just disappointed.

13. Act my age.

12. Today’s tea.

11. Let me in.

10. Some of y’all.

9. Waves and AirPods.

8. Fyre Festival BJ face.

7. The Pelosi (hand) clap.

6. Buff bunny small bunny.

5. Y’all scared to moan.

4. You’re weak, Sasuke.

3. Driving in…

2. Due to personal reasons.

1. I don’t recall.

 

Stay tuned for the rest of the year!

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This Couple Rode Every Ride at Disney World – Without a Fast Pass

You’re probably asking yourself, ‘How did these two pull off this amazing feat?’ Well, we’re going to explain that to you right now.

If you’ve ever set foot on Disney World’s property, you know that you have to navigate a sea of humanity. It’s PACKED with people pretty much all the time.

But Shane Lindsay and Kristina Hawkins somehow managed to pull off the incredible achievement of riding all 46 rides at Disney World during a recent visit. And they did it all in 18 hours without FastPasses.

The couple knew the odds were against them, but they couldn’t resist. Lindsay started the Parkeology Challenge, a competition that calls for participants to ride every ride at the four Orlando theme parks (The Magic Kingdom, Epcot, Disney’s Hollywood Studios, and Disney’s Animal Kingdom).

Lindsay and Hawkins documented their stop on every ride on Twitter. They began their quest in the Magic Kingdom at 7:51 a.m. on a Wednesday morning and completed their excellent adventure just before closing time at 2:00 a.m. on Thursday. They said their longest wait was an hour long for Animal Kingdom’s Flight of Passage.

The Parkeology Challenge was created in 2014 and since then only 6% of the 325 teams that have dared to try have completed the mission. Lindsay and Hawkins have completed the challenge before, but this was the first time they did it without a FastPass or a MagicBand, which allow you to skip over those neverending lines of people waiting to get onto rides.

Hawkins said of the experience and resulting viral attention, “It’s mostly just Disney street cred, I would say. It was almost like we broke the internet, the Disney internet, everyone was freaking out.”

Impressive! A job well done!

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How 15 Childless Couples Feel About Sticking to Their “No Kids” Rule

The choice to stay child free is becoming more and more common – and though younger people are accepting of the option, older people will still claim people who opt out of parenting “will regret it one day.”

Is it true? Well, these 13+ people who made the choice years ago are about to tell all…

15. We couldn’t have had the adventures we did

Been married for 21 years and initially we tried to have kids but found out that it was going to be hard to do. Wife was heartbroken at first, but I was somewhat relieved. It’s a lot of responsibility and your life changes to accommodate a child.

Over the years, wife has actually said a few times that she was glad we didn’t have kids because we couldn’t have had the adventures we did. I feel like it was the right choice and we’re better off due to not having kids. We love our life and are continuing our adventures now in our 50’s and we’re starting to make plans for retirement.

14. It’s absolutely no contest

My husband & I are in our 50s & have been married 19 years. We both grew up with abusive dads, were the “smart kid” in the family, got the hell out ASAP, worked our way through college & made something of ourselves before meeting & getting married. A lot of common ground & we’ve built a strong, rock-solid marriage.

We considered having kids, but after working so hard on healing from the childhood abuse & escaping the cycle of poverty we grew up in, we decided long ago that just the two of us was enough. We still consider ourselves a family and we’ve been really happy with our life together. Our home is peaceful & that’s the thing we care about the most.

If I had to choose now, knowing what I do, between becoming a mother & having the marriage & home life I now enjoy, it’s absolutely no contest. Zero regrets.

13. Our money and time are our own

I am late 50s, married, no kids. It’s a great life. Our money and time are our own.

I do have a large number of nieces and nephews, as well as being “uncle” to many friend’s kids. And they are all nice as hell to a fun aunt an uncle with a lot of disposable income. In their late teen and college years we become confidantes when parent relations are strained. We help them with the occasional vacation or help them get a good used car.

We may not have kids, but the kids in the family think we are awesome.

12. Far too many cons

I go through phases where I regret not having a kid, I still have plenty of time: My wife and I are 36, but we made the decision to be childless a decade ago, maybe more.

I understand the appeal of having children and feel it on some primal level, but logically the pros vs. cons of having a kid… there are just far too many cons.

11. That day never came

I always thought I’d wake up one day and be clucky and ready to start a family. That day never came and I’m pushing 50 now so I’ve missed my chance.

I sometimes wonder if I made a mistake not having kids but its not something i really regret.

On the plus side, I am looking at retiring with a 6 figure income at 52, regularly donate and do charity work. In-fact I am looking at starting my own charity at the end of the year to dedicate more time to when I retire.

In some ways not having children has/will allow me to help more people than just my immediate family.

My suggestion is do what feels right, either way its a big decision that only you and your partner should make.

10. An important difference

For my spouse, I can only say that they have physical and psychological issues that they’ve mentioned that they’d rather not pass on to a child.

For myself, I’ve always said that while I’m occasionally afraid that someday I might regret not having children, that’s not the same as wanting children, and that’s an important difference to me. I have my own reasons to believe I’d probably not be a good parent.

Yeah, we both get concerned sometimes whether anyone will be arsed to care about the sole survivor once the other’s gone or incapacitated. But this thought is the result of our decisions, not a basis for changing our minds about having kids, which we will not. Having kids or not is no guarantee that you’ll end up cared for or not anyway, though it does probably move the needle on your odds.

Edited to clarify that last paragraph somewhat.

9. Not having kids is just as normal

We’ve been married twenty years. We are both 50. Neither of us wanted to bring children into our family.

I spent a WONDERFUL afternoon with my 16 year old niece yesterday. We talked about her boyfriend, picked blackberries and discovered a woodland clam [fingernail mussel] living in a mud puddle [vernal pool] in the woods, which we named Fred. It was magical. I just adore her.

Not having kids is just as normal as wanting kids, I’ve always felt.

Zero regrets.

8. It’s best to hold off

No regrets.

Not everyone wants them, and if you’re not sure, it’s best to hold off. Having ambivalent (or worse) parents does a real number on a kids self esteem.

7. A huge relief

My husband and I are 48.

Not having kids is a huge relief, still. We get to travel, have a nice house, walk around naked if we want, and I have disposable income to support causes that are important.

My life is fulfilling and happy.

6. Missing the Mommy gene

I’m a 49 year old female and have never regretted my decision to not have kids. I think I’ve always been missing the mommy gene. I like not having the responsibilities and obligations (and expenses!) that go along with having kids.

5. I would not have made a good parent

I’m not a couple, just a person.

I’ve been in lots of relationships and was married twice. I would not have made a good parent. Regret sometimes I wasn’t born into a different life, but given the cards I was dealt… I think I made the right choice in that department and have no regrets.

4. I’m not really capable of doing it alone

I go back and forth.

My SO has some significant mental health issues and I know that I would be alone doing much of the emotional labor of raising a child, and I know I’m not really capable of doing it alone. Sometimes I worry very much about what I will do when I am old. I’m an introvert and dont have many friends and am not overly likable, so I assume I will be alone. I just hope that there are some kind robots to take care of me, and that I’ll die before the robots turn on us.

3. He truly loves life

I have a professor at my university who has been married to his wife for 50 years, and they have no children. He calls us his children and always talks about how he and his wife are inseparable. He’s a really eccentric and energetic guy, even in his 70’s. He gives out candy to the entire class before every lecture he gives.

He seems like he truly loves life and has no regrets about not having any children.

EDIT: Holy hell! Thanks so much for the gold, gracious benefactor!

2. We’re good

I’m 60 now, been married for 29 years.

God did not provide me with the proper temperament to raise children. Have never regretted our decision to be child free. We’re good ??.

1. I am slowly learning to accept

My wife and I have been married for 12 years – I am 36 and she is 40, so, yeah, likely not in the cards. It is a reality that, while tough, I am slowly learning to accept.

I realized that as a guy, I always look at having kids with rose-colored glasses – ball games, working on my classic car with them, dad jokes, the fun stuff. That’s easy for me as it’s not my body and sacrifice. My wife is not on board and it’s her body and I love and respect her to much to force her hand. If either one of us are not 100% ok with a major decision, we don’t do it, end of discussion.

I look forward to spoiling my nieces and nephews and spending more time with my wife and continuing to make our world about us, forever.

Parenting is no joke, so the more information you have beforehand, the better!

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