People Debate What Would Happen if You Sat on Your Own Voodoo Doll

Sometimes the internet can seem like more trouble than it’s worth.

But then I see important discussions like this, and I remember the value of the world wide web.

If you sit on your own voodoo doll, can you ever get up again? from NoStupidQuestions

Before we begin the discussion let’s get it out of the way that the general cultural understanding of a “voodoo doll” has little to nothing to do with the real world traditions behind the namesake.

But for the purpose of philosophical argument, let’s assume we’re defining this doll as a thing that causes its target to experience the same things it experiences.

Aaaaand go, Reddit!

1. To some, the prognosis is clear.

Since the voodoo doll will be deformed and crushed under your weight, your body will be too, probably breaking some bones in your body or even crushing your vital organs.

You won’t be able to get up ever again.

– ParsleyJam

2. Some would-be astronomers chimed in.

I propose sitting on your own voodoo doll would create a black hole.

Sitting on your voodoo doll would cause your weight to be applied to yourself. Because you’re on your voodoo doll, the weight will also be applied onto the voodoo doll again then onto you again, then the voodoo doll, then you- infinitely more.

Idk much about physics but infinite weight onto a finite space sounds like it would create a black hole to me

– That_Duck1

3. Is it more about the feeling?

From what I’ve seen in pop culture, things that happen to a voodoo doll only cause the effects of those things to happen to the person, rather than the thing itself. so, if you burn a voodoo doll, the person will get burned and be in extreme pain, but they won’t catch on fire.

likewise, i think if you sat on a voodoo doll, you would be crushed as if by your own weight, but there wouldn’t be any extra pressure applied to the system.

– savushkin_redux

4. Perhaps it’s a “sympathetic link.”

Anything that someone does to said doll happens to you, right? Mmmm, not quite.

The doll is supposed to be a parallel sympathetic link to the You who is alive and breathing–not a physical marionette. If that were true, we’d’ve harnessed these powers to launch people into space, safely. That would be a strange alternate universe, no? Instead, as I said, it’s a sympathetic link. Think of it as a connection via your brain, rather than your body (it’s meant as a spiritual connection). That’s why when someone pricks the doll, the person who the doll is connected to will feel that pain in the area that was ganked. If they THREW that doll across the room, the body the doll is connected to won’t feel the kinetic force of being thrown–they’ll only feel the pain of hitting the wall (or floor, or wherever the kinetic energy comes to a sudden stop).

So. Let’s say that person got ahold of their own voodoo doll. And, carelessly, forgot it was on a chair and sat on it.

Nothing would happen, because basically?They have their spirit back.

The link is more or less neutralized because the connection made through the doll was to your spirit–and what made the connection possible was through use of something that was once part of you. So if anything, sitting on the voodoo doll would destroy the connection between you and the doll, because it would deform or twist it so much that it no longer resembled you.

Now, if someone ELSE sat on the doll…

– RecycledEternity

5. How fit are you?

I would think it would depend on your personal fitness level, some people can lift their own body weight and some can’t.

If you’re strong enough to shove through the force of yourself I would think you could.

– katobabee

6. What’s the reality?

It comes down to how the dolls work in your mind.

I feel like the way voodoo dolls are commonly shown in media, it’s not that they cause a physical force to the victim, more a sensation. Like getting needles stabbed causes pain, not bleeding and puncture wounds.

Based on that, I feel like sitting on your voodoo doll would just cause you to feel pressure or a crushing sensation or shortness of breath, not a physical inability to move.

– tapport

7. What the heck is “thaumic congruence?”

Sure. When your own weight drops on your chest, it’s a pretty sure bet that it will both break your focus, and interrupt the charm of binding.

If someone else is actually maintaining the thaumic congruence, just ask them to give it a rest for a minute.

Be sure to apply betadine or peroxide to your back side if the doll contained any pins.

– GaeasSon

8. Some people think it would be fine.

Yes, you’d be fine, and you would have no problem getting up again. You’d feel no pain, no discomfort.

Most other answers here are misunderstanding what a voodoo doll does. They are trying to suggest that there is an actual physical connection between the doll and the subject of the doll, the person who the doll represents. And therefore, whatever the doll experiences, the subject also experiences.

This is not how a voodoo doll works.

The doll isn’t some New Orleans version of quantum entanglement. It thrives instead on emotions. The only thing that matters is spirit, and intent. Anything you do accidentally to a voodoo doll doesn’t evoke any change in the subject. But even symbolic bad thoughts toward the doll can cause damage to the subject.

This principle is why a voodoo doll doesn’t actually need to be damaged. You can stick a pin in it’s arm, and cause pain, and that pain is just the same whether it’s a tiny pin, or cutting off the arm with scissors. The point is the intention of the voodoo doll’s holder.

– CatOfGrey

9. Is it a loop?

So whatever you do to your voodoo doll, it applies to you.

It might seem like it’s an endless loop, but it’s just whatever your weight is will be dropped on you. so just imagine if you’re like 60 kg, you’ll feel like there’s 60kg weighing you down.

Depending on your strength, if you’re able to move, which a normal person probs could cuz of the adrenaline I guess, then you can get your **s off the voodoo doll and have the extra weight disappeared instantly.

– mae916

10. Some acknowledged their limitations.

I am limited in knowledge of voodoo and magic in general, but as I understand it, focus would be required to activate the doll.

So if you accidentally sat on the doll, nothing should happen, as you were not actively casting a spell on the doll.

Now if you sat on the doll, and focused your energy on the doll, you might feel yourself sitting on yourself, but you eventually would stop focusing on yourself and then you could get up.

– MuadDib1942

11. What about the Minecraft approach?

I’ve been playing Minecraft all night; is it possible to dig a hole coming from underneath the doll, big enough for the doll to fall through but too small for your body, thus freeing you from your own trap?

– WithSugar0nTop

12. It’s all about the ratio.

For your consideration: If the voodoo doll represents you in a ratio to your real body, and you sit on it with your full weight, you will experience that increased weight perhaps as a ratio.

That increased weight then is experienced again by the voodoo doll. This could create a feedback loop of increasing weight.

The consequences of this could range from broken furniture to death, depending on where the voodoo doll was when you sat on it.

– Subpar_Scientist

13. What a sensation.

Voodoo dolls, too my understanding, only inflict sensations. A classic example is when a Voodoo doll is poked with a needle you don’t get a wound just the pain.

So you’d feel the pain of someone of your weight sitting across your entire body but it wouldn’t apply the actual weight just the pain.

So you’d be able to stand up. Even if it apply the pressure of your weight on you, and you couldn’t push it away, you could wiggle to the side until you’re off the doll.

– OhTheHueManatee

14. Under pressure.

The pressure will be applied on yourself milloins and billions of times in some seconds until you destroy your own body and no more pressure is applied

– AtmosphereSweet5130

15. Then there’s this approach…

Yes, because voodoo dolls aren’t supernatural

– Roskal

Dumb ol’ rationalists coming in here and ruining the fun like usual.

But what do you think of this?

Tell us in the comments.

The post People Debate What Would Happen if You Sat on Your Own Voodoo Doll appeared first on UberFacts.

Hilariously Bad Facebook Takes You Gotta Check Out

There sure are some bad takes out there in Facebook land. It’s almost like there’s a challenge on the books for who can be the wrongest about the simplest thing.

Because seriously, it doesn’t matter the subject, it doesn’t matter how simple, someone somewhere will have an awful take on it.

Check out the bad Facebook takes on these subjects:

10. America

It’s not a stereotype, we really seriously don’t understand that the world is bigger than our own country.

9. Keith Urban

Probably trolling. Hopefully trolling. Oh God, please be trolling.

8. Cellphones and prayer

Bless me Father, for I have sinned quite a bit.

7. Plutonium

Now that is some radioactive levels of dumb.

6. Math

I love it when the dumb is mixed in with a hearty dose of arrogant.

5. School

Losing your household’s livelihood to own the libs.

4. Books

Well, we’ve come full circle folks.

3. Evolutionary history

To be clear: the idea is that the asteroid kicked up so much dust that it temporarily changed the planet’s atmosphere, killing off the bigger reptiles and allowing for small mammals to thrive.
Those small mammals eventually gave rise to us. Read a book.

2. US…history…

I genuinely don’t know where to begin with this so. Enjoy?

1. The Earth itself

I’m sure I don’t need to say this, but there’s no “up” or “down” in space.
The earth doesn’t have a “lowest point.”

And there you have it. Now go forth, back to your own social media, and just…try not to be this dumb.

What’s the worst take you’ve seen recently?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Hilariously Bad Facebook Takes You Gotta Check Out appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share “Passive-Aggressive” Things That Take Life to a Whole New Level

Hi, there!

Wikipedia defines passive-aggressive behavior as “a pattern of passive hostility and an avoidance of direct communication.”

In other words, it’s when you need to go on the attack without actually confronting anyone. It’s petty, it’s sly, and if you’re just observing rather than being on the receiving end, it can be downright hilarious.

Here are ten incredible examples from the wide world of Twitter.

10. Drive on by

What in the hell kind of roadside madness is this?

9. It’s time to stop

This is an alien trying to disguise itself as an Earth sign and you can’t convince me otherwise.

8. I must confess

This is why Protestants just skipped the middle man.

7. The s**t is bananas

I don’t find this behavior appealing in the slightest.

6. The terrible twos

Psh. You call THAT a pothole?

5. Over the line

Timmy Turtle says “Use your damn eyes.”

4. High art

Is this Banksy?

3. Bed side manner

You’re in double trouble because your side is trapped against the dang wall.

2. Sick burn

You ever see something and just say to yourself “Glad I’m not in that relationship?”

1. He’s my witness

When even the robot in your pocket gets tired of trying to make you live right.

Remember, conflict is best resolved through direct and level-headed communication. But that’s also way less funny so if you’re gonna be slick, take pictures. Come on, don’t be selfish, we wanna get in on this.

Have you been the writer/receiver of any passive-aggressive nonsense lately?

Dish it out in the comments.

The post People Share “Passive-Aggressive” Things That Take Life to a Whole New Level appeared first on UberFacts.

11 People Who Have No Clue How Female Anatomy Works

Funny thing about the internet: it allows you to become famous not only for being great but also for being truly, epically, horrifically bad.

Take these bozos for example: their claim to infamy is having NO CLUE how the female body works. I mean, seriously, did they never take biology?

1. (Oris) it?

Photo Credit: Myceliemz24/reddit

2. Oh shut up and go to bed, Philip!

Photo Credit: anafuckboi /reddit

3. She’s not wrong… but he definitely is.

Photo Credit: rockservent/reddit.com

4. This is actually true. People were scared AF of trains.

Photo Credit: sgtlizzie/reddit.com

5. Not even with the tiniest “probe”

6. Pro tip. You should def try it sometime.

Photo Credit: Kore624/reddit

7. That escalated at lightning speed!

Photo Credit: aguadiablo

8. Imagine having to sit next to anybody who actually believes this?

Photo Credit: kittydarko/reddit

9. But testosterone is cool, right bro?

Photo Credit: chopstunk/reddit

10. I wonder how much cow pee this guy has consumed…

Photo Credit: cainisrealcool/reddit

11. #toodumbforlife

Photo Credit: Clementine_696/reddit

Faith in humanity NOT restored.

The post 11 People Who Have No Clue How Female Anatomy Works appeared first on UberFacts.