Mothers Share What They Wish Someone Had Told Them Before They Gave Birth

Giving birth is no joke. And the truth is that many women enter into pregnancy totally unequipped for what their bodies are about to endure. Sure there are books and blog posts on the patter, but other women could definitely be more candid about some aspects of childbirth. We’re not going to stop having babies, but these 13+ moms just wished they’d been more prepared for all the “fun” for which they were in store.

#15. Hell

“The first time you get up after a c section is hell. Absolutely hurts so bad and your incision takes weeks to heal if not months.

Being awake during your c section and you feel all the tugging and pulling inside you.”

#14. It hurts to pee

“It hurts to pee afterwards, but if you lean forward on the toilet then the pee goes away from the most painful areas.

Also try and time your pain relief around trips to the toilet or other strenous activities.”

#13. Not a nice surprise

“That you have the worst month long period of your life after giving birth. I read books, took childbirth classes and had no idea. Not a nice surprise.”

#12. From the front to the back

“Thank baby jesus I did not experience this, I knew you could tear so I took steps to prevent it, but I did not know you could tear literally all the way from the front to the back and need reconstructive surgery. Happened to my cousin.

edit – Since everyone keeps asking what steps I took: (TMI alert) regular perineal massages, use of large “toys”, and I opted for water births as the water supposedly relaxes your muscles and allows you to get in a position your body finds best for childbirth rather than giving birth strapped down on your back. Like kid 1 was born while I was on all fours and kid 2 was born with me standing up.”

#11. A total victory

“I am in the UK and had a c section birth a couple of years ago and am 6 months pregnant with my second. The bits I didn’t know beforehand were all straight after the birth and not during.

The tea and hot buttered toast I got to eat afterwards was one of the most delicious meals I have ever eaten.

The post partum bleeding goes on for weeks.

The first poop after a c section feels like a total victory.

The first shower afterwards also felt brilliant.

Never EVER miss the timing of any painkillers you are advised to take!

Doctors and nurses will come by frequently and check you and your baby over for all sorts of things.

I was in hospital 2 nights and your baby is totally your responsibility as soon as they arrive. The midwives helped out with nappy changes when I still couldn’t feel my legs but as soon as I could stand/walk that was it. As my baby wouldn’t sleep much at the start I did manage to get them to have her for two one hour periods which ended up meaning I only got 3 hours sleep in 3 days and I felt horrific. Things got much better when I got home.

My husband wasn’t allowed to stay in hospital overnight so that feeling of crushing solo responsibility was difficult to adjust to.

One more thing to note, all the Mums I know none of us have had a straight forward natural birth. I did NCT classes and of the 8 couples which participated 4 of the Mums ended up with c-sections and at least 2 of the others needed assisted births (forceps etc). These were higher than the stats we were told about during the classes.”

#10. A compliment is a compliment

“Apparently some doctors are really excited when they see a good placenta. Well, a compliment is a compliment, I guess.”

#9. Into high gear

“Your uterus continues to contract after delivery to get back down to pre-prego size. It’s pretty painful, worse than menstrual cramps. And breastfeeding really kicks the contractions into high gear.”

#8. Do not investigate

“Your vagina is going to look like a nightmare after. Don’t look at it or touch it, put ice packs and medicine on it but don’t investigate. I repeat: DO NOT INVESTIGATE. You’ll just keep yourself up at night fretting over what happens if it never goes back to normal. But if you do choose to look know that it won’t look like your labia just lost the title fight forever.”

#7. How sad I was

“I had known about PPD and the “baby blues”, but it was honestly sickening to me how sad I was after getting home from the hospital. I had wanted a baby for so long, finally had him and then just hated it. I felt like “what did I do? Why did I do this?” It was a shock. I had thought about just leaving. Which was absurd. Eventually it went away and I enjoyed my little boy. I mean, at the time too though, I did love being a mom because I constantly checked on him, took pics and all that. But the depression you get can be surprising, considering how badly I wanted to be a mom and then I’m like “I wish I was anywhere but with him.”

He is almost 4 and I am so happy. Seeing him after a full day of work is probably the best feeling in the world to me. I just wish I had prepared myself.more mentally and for those challenging first weeks/months.”

#6. Be flexible

“Labor and delivery nurse here.

There is no shame in using medications to make the process easier, especially epidurals. Natural birth is a beautiful thing, but not always the best thing. Be flexible! Things will come up that you didn’t anticipate.
Know your OB/GYN. Use friends/family/mommy blogs to refer you to a good doctor/midwife. They can be nice and charming in the office, and a totally different person in the hospital.
Don’t tell your friends and family to come visit until after you’ve given birth and recovered. I’ve seen couples invite their entire family and social circle come see them when they are exhausted, in pain, and trying to breastfeed their new baby. They are trying to perform for their guests instead of resting and bonding with the baby.
Bonus: prepare for more shit/blood/bodily fluids than you’ve ever seen your life.
EDIT: Thank you for the gold! And since people are seeing this comment here’s a quick PSA: VACCINATE YOUR CHILDREN!”

#5. Like a slip-n-slide

“How…..wet everything can get. If your water breaks and you have a slow leak… there’ll be fluid at home, in the car, in the waiting/triage area, in your room, in the hallway, in the bathroom. Combined with all the blood loss and peeing yourself, and it’s almost like a slip-n-slide trying to get around. They gave me a big chuck pad to put between my legs but it was kind of pointless because it wouldn’t stay up unless you held it.”

#4. This is not fine make it stop

“A lot of women throw up! I have a vomit phobia and was not aware of this until about a month before I was due. Luckily there are drugs you can take that help (I managed to avoid throwing up with a lot of drugs).

Also the pain wasn’t as gradual as I was expecting. I went from “this is fine” to “this is not fine make it stop” in maybe half an hour. But then you have to wait before they can get you set up with an epidural, so it’s hard to avoid that “not okay” period entirely.”

#3. Prolapse and sneeze-pee

“Prolapse and hemorrhoids. Your pelvic floor is fucked. Sneeze pee is still a thing.

I hired a personal trainer to help me lose weight and get stronger. Working out has really really really helped strengthen my pelvic floor and lessen my prolapse.”

#2. It’s not

“If you think getting a c-section is the ‘easy way out’, it’s not. It’s major abdominal surgery, and your recovery time will be much longer. You are also more at risk for complications and infection. I spent two weeks in hospital after my first with a raging infection that could have prevented me from being able to have more children.”

#1. Like a little old man

“That the baby would look like a little old man, and that I might not feel emotionally attached right away.

Birthed 4 babies.”

 

Share with your currently pregnant friends, y’all. They deserve a head’s up, and it’s too late for them to back out now anyway.

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Even Dog Lovers Might Not Know How to Pronounce These 7 Breeds Correctly

There are a TON of dog breeds out there. And unless you are deep into the world of competitive dog shows, you probably haven’t heard of most of them. Add that to the fact that plenty of people prefer mutts of questionable parentage to dropping a bunch of bucks on a name, and, well, it’s not surprising that many may not know how to pronounce the fancy-schmancy breed names listed below.

That said, in the interest of knowledge (and sounding smart at parties), below are 7 common doggy mispronunciations, along with the correct way to say them.

#7. Dachshund

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Common mispronunciation: dash-hund
Correct pronunciation: dahks-und

#6. Vizsla

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Common mispronunciation: viz-sluh
Correct pronunciation: veesh-la

#5. Shih Tzu

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Common mispronunciation: sh*ts-ew
Correct pronunciation: she-dzoo

But I mean, the first way is more fun.

#4. Newfoundland

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Common mispronunciation: new-found-land
Correct pronunciation: new-fun-land

#3. Bichon Frise

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Common mispronunciation: bich-on freeze
Correct pronunciation: bee-shawn free-zay

Really put your nose into it.

#2. Weimaraner

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Common mispronunciation: way-mar-ann-er
Correct pronunciation: vahy-muh-rah-ner

German accent included, please.

#1. Papillon

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Common mispronunciation: pap-ill-on
Correct pronunciation: pap-ee-yawn

It’s French (it means butterfly) so feel free to bust out your accent to really nail it.

 

Don’t say I never did anything for you!

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11 Energizing Facts You Didn’t Know About Coffee

Mmmm…coffee. Just the word makes me think of that intoxicating smell. Could you go for a cup right about now? Because I sure could!

Coffee, however, hides a few surprises. It’s more than just a hug in a mug. The next time you are sitting with your friends at your favorite coffee shop, use this list of 11 dark roasted facts to show off your OCD (obsessive coffee disorder).

1. Black Ivory Coffee in Thailand is one of the most expensive coffees in the world at more than $500 per pound.

Elephants eat the beans and then poop them out half-digested. The coffee produced has a robust flavor and drinker are willing to shell out the big bucks for the hard-to-find brew.

After it’s cleaned, of course.

Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons

2 Almost all the world’s religions accept coffee.

Although Mormonism does not allow caffeinated “hot beverages,” including coffee, and Seventh Day Adventism also eschews the brew.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

3. Coffee is highly addictive.

One small cup per day is enough to hook most people. Without a daily cup, 125 million Americans would suffer headaches and 32 million would experience actual symptoms of withdrawal.

Photo Credit: Maxpixel

4. Don’t look for an Espresso Romano in Italy.

Most Italians have never heard of it. But you can make one yourself easy by adding a bit of lemon juice and sugar to an espresso. Rub the rind along the top of the demitasse for added brightness.

Photo Credit: Wero

5. Starbucks will happily make you a Quadriginoctuple Frap if you are willing to pay around $50 for it.

And if you actually want 48 shots of espresso, soy powder, protein powder, two bananas and a strawberry and salt topping.

Photo Credit: Pxhere

6. Hawaii’s gourmet Kona coffee is the only commercially grown coffee by a state in the U.S.

Grown in mineral-rich volcano soil, Kona coffee is on the list of the most expensive coffees in the world.

The U.S. territory of Puerto Rico also grows coffee, but it is not a state.

Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons

7. Coffee has a history of being banned.

One attempt was by Italian clerics who tried to ban coffee as the “devil’s drink” in the 16th century. Instead, Pope Clement VII baptized it to cheat the devil because he thought it was delicious.

Photo Credit: Catholic Gentlemen

8. Coffee can improve your memory.

Studies show when we learn something new, the DNA in brain cells breaks a little. Coffee can help repair these breaks faster. This is particularly helpful as we age and our own neurons’ abilities to repair these breaks slows.

Photo Credit: Pxhere

9. Coffee is only slightly diuretic and does not dehydrate you.

You do not lose any more fluids than what you take in when drinking coffee, contrary to popular belief.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

10. Coffee consumption is linked to lowered mortality from many diseases.

There is evidence that coffee can even protect against Parkinson’s disease and type 2 diabetes.

Photo Credit: Pexels

11. Coffee’s anti-inflammatory and antioxidant properties are mood boosters.

Chlorogenic acid, ferulic acid, and caffeic acid help soothe inflamed nerve cells that bring on depression, which helps you feel better.

Photo Credit: Pexels

Coffee is chock full of history, and the science on your daily cuppa gets more fascinating by the year. And since it’s fantastic for your health and your mood, the next time the barista asks how you take your coffee, you tell him (or her), “Very seriously.”

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This is Elon Musk’s Favorite Brain Teaser…Can You Solve It?

Technology companies love to ask their potential employees tough questions to throw them off balance. For example, one of Google’s favorite interview questions is reportedly to ask, “how many people are using Facebook in San Francisco at 2:30pm on a Friday,” while Hewlett-Packard prefers, “if Germans were the tallest people in the world, how would you prove it?”

Yikes…how are you supposed to know the answers to those?

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Whatever the question, the purpose behind it is to see how the interviewee processes information and attempts to solve complex problems. The interviewers don’t necessarily care whether or not you end up with the right answer; it’s more about how you get to whatever you get to.

Knowing this, it’s probably not surprising to learn that Elon Musk, the CEO of SpaceX, also has a favorite brain teaser.

Photo Credit: Wikipedia

He reportedly asks:

“You’re standing on the surface of the Earth. You walk one mile south, one mile west, and one mile north. You end up exactly where you started. Where are you?”

Don’t feel too bad if the answer eludes you. When CNBC took to the streets of New York and asked random passersby the teaser, the majority of people didn’t get it right. Of course, they didn’t also have a job on the line, so they probably weren’t as motivated as Musk’s interviewees.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Ok.

Ready for the answer?

Here we go.

The North Pole.

That’s the primary answer, but there’s also another, more complicated answer: one mile north of a circle with a one-mile circumference surrounding the South Pole (so, basically, 2 miles north of the South Pole. If that seems confusing, this Business Insider video clarifies:

“You’ll walk one mile south to reach this circle, trace that mile-long circle’s path, and return one mile north to your starting point.”

Now do you get it? Mr. Musk hopes you do.

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HPV Vaccine for Adults up to Age 45 Has Been Approved by FDA

HPV is an STD with little to no systems. While that may sound like a good thing at first, it’s actually quite the opposite. In fact, it has led to a large part of the population being infected – and able to transmit the virus – without being aware of what’s happening.

In the long run, those factors have contributed to a large number of people – nearly 80 million and counting – being infected in the United States alone.

And there is a giant caveat to the “few or no symptoms” bit: while most strains of HPV (there are a lot of strains) are not super harmful, some of them cause cancer.

HPV is also the virus that causes genital warts, so there’s that, too.

Photo Credit: PBS

There is no test to spot HPV in men, so most probably never find out they have it – and will continue to pass it on, the whole while. HPV can lay dormant for years, showing up only on an abnormal pap smear or when the first signs of cancers of the cervix, penis, anus, and throat start to appear.

Photo Credit: Wikipedia

In 2006, the vaccine Gardasil was approved for boys and girls aged 9-26 to help curb the spread of HPV. Recently, the FDA approved the latest version of the vaccine for everyone up to the age of 45. Gardasil 9 has been proven to protect against nine strains of the virus – better than the previous version, which protected only against 5.

Prior to the approval, the FDA conducted a study that tracked 3200 women for three and a half years. CNN reported that the study “found that Gardasil 9 was 88% effective in the prevention of vulvar, vaginal, and cervical lesions, cervical cancer, and genital warts.”

Photo Credit: Wikipedia

Dr. Peter Marks, director of the FDA’s Center for Biologics Evaluation and Research, released this statement:

“Today’s approval represents an important opportunity to help prevent HPV-related diseases and cancers in a broader age range. HPV vaccination prior to becoming infected with the HPV types covered by the vaccine has the potential to prevent more than 90 percent of these cancers, or 31,200 cases every year, from ever developing.”

The FDA approval will also encourage insurance companies to cover the vaccine, which can cost $400-$500 out of pocket.

Stay safe out there, friends. Do your research, talk to your doctor about protecting yourself, and don’t forget to get tested for STDs on the reg!

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Why Does Childcare Cost So Much?

The cost of childcare for one child tops $10,000 a year nationwide. This is despite the fact that early childcare educators – the people who staff childcare and preschools across the country – barely make more than the national average minimum wage ($11-$15/hr),

It’s easy to get angry about how much it costs to leave your child with someone responsible while you go to work, but if we break down the income and expenses, the truth is that no one is really winning in the current system.

We’ve shared a video below that was put together by the national advocacy group Child Care Aware of America that reveals how the numbers may seem crazy, but really aren’t. In their hypothetical child care center there are 40 full-time children enrolled for 10 hours a day, with each family paying $10k/year per child, meaning the center starts the year with a budget of $400,000…which seems like a lot more than it really is.

First, they’ve got to pay the basics of rent, utilities, and maintenance, which adds up to around 12% of their budget, or $48,000.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Church basements and people’s homes offer the lowest overhead, which leaves more cash for the other necessities on this list, but often parents prefer centers that are located centrally to high-traffic areas on their way to work.

Next up, classroom materials, food, and administrative costs – 23% of the budget, or $92,000.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Parents want to leave their child in a nice, clean classroom that provides age and developmentally-appropriate toys, snacks and/or lunches. This category also includes insurance, licensing, and accreditation fees, plus staff training and continuing education, all of which are necessary evils.

You’ve got to pay your staff, and it eats up 65% of the budget, or around $260,000 a year.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Regulations require a certain number of workers per child, and taking care of babies and toddlers all day requires a lot of eyes and hands. The base ratio is one teacher for every three infants, and one teacher for every four children 1-4 years old.

In the example in the video, the salaries are divvied up between a director ($22/hr), three lead teachers for each of the three classrooms ($13/hr) and six assistant teachers scraping the bottom of the barrel at $10.50/hr. And that’s a minimum.

This doesn’t include medical benefits or paid vacations, incidentally.

A kindergarten teacher – responsible for the education of children just one or two years older – makes an average of $36,000 more a year, and receives retirement, medical, and vacation benefits.

Right now, there doesn’t seem to be a good answer to the problem, though some states are working to provide at least one or two years of publicly-funded preschool. Offering that across the country is a far off prospect, however, and maybe a pipe dream.

After watching the video below and checking out the numbers, you’ll see that the people caring for your child are doing their best with very little.

So maybe cut them some slack, no matter how much your wallet is hurting at the end of the month.

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The U.S. Navy Teaches You How to Fall Asleep in 2 Minutes or Less

There are many complicated factors that contribute to Sleep deprivation. Things like excessive stress, poor diets, emotional or mental health issues are just the tip of the iceberg. In fact, statistics show that up to 70 million people in the United States suffer from sleeping disorders.

But there exists a technique that’s said to help you fall asleep fast, one that was originally developed by army chiefs concerned about their soldiers’ performances; exhaustion and sleep deprivation can lead to mistakes, and those can be deadly when dealing with soldiers on a battlefield. You can read about it in a book called Relax and Win: Championship Performance, that was published back in 1981.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

The method, detailed below, has been proven to be successful 96% of the time after 6 weeks of implementing it. You should ideally spend 1.5 minutes on each step, and then it should take you only 120 more seconds to fall asleep!

Supposedly.

Step 1

While laying down, relax your facial muscles, including your tongue, jaw, and the muscles around your eyes.

Step 2

Drop your shoulders as low as you can manage, then relax your upper, then lower, arms on one side and then the other.

Step 3

Breathe out slowly and relax your chest, then your legs from your thighs to your calves and down your lower legs.

Step 4

Completely clear your mind.

This step is gonna be hard – it’s not easy to empty out your mind if you’ve never tried before. But it gets much easier with practice.

Lloyd Bud Winter, the author of the book mentioned above, suggests envisioning one of the following three images: 1. lying in a canoe on a calm lake with nothing but a clear blue sky above you, 2. being snuggled up in a black velvet hammock in a pitch-black room, or 3. saying ‘don’t think, don’t think, don’t think’ over and over again.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

With a little practice, this method is supposed to drastically reduce problems falling asleep. And since not getting enough sleep is linked with issues like a weakened immune system, memory trouble, high blood pressure, weight gain, and others, giving it a try is worth a shot!

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Map Shows The Most Googled Medical Symptoms in Each State

Ninety-nine-point-nine percent of the time, self-diagnosis online is incorrect and you will have wasted your time for nothing.

Still, that doesn’t stop people from across the country from Googling their symptoms every time they experience a fraction of a headache.

Is Everyone Sick, or Just Me?

Curious to know what your neighbors are Googling? The Medicare plans review site Medicare Health Plans used Google Trends to find frequently searched medical symptoms by state for the past year. Check out the map below to see if you are the only one worried about passing strangely colored poop (spoiler alert: not if you live in South Carolina or Wisconsin).

Photo Credit: Medicare Health Plans

Our Health, Googled

The most searched symptoms pointed to respiratory illnesses. Makes sense as many Americans suffer from colds, allergies and flu yearly. In fact, over 155 million flu vaccines were manufactured and administered in the past year.

Stress symptoms were also widely Googled, especially in the Western United States – hello sweaty palms and stomach acid. Guys, try to fit in more yoga.

Meanwhile, Eastern folks experienced “loss of sleep,” and “the sniffles.” Except for Rhode Island and New Jersey, who not only got plenty of sleep, they had “lucid dreams.” Is that even a medical condition? Stress was also a major concern along the Atlantic Seaboard.

What to do Now

While not an ideal way to manage health, Internet research is helpful for pointing to what may be causing your discomfort. But use it to compile questions for a visit with your doctor. Meaning, go to a doctor! Having notes and questions with you will make for a more proactive appointment, especially when you feel like crap.

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These 6+ Interesting Facts That Will Open Your Eyes

Did you know that chimpanzees can recognize butts? How’d you like to have that power?

And you’ll learn that fact and 6 more when you keep on reading this fact set.

1. Not humane

Photo Credit: did you know?

2. I know you from somewhere…

Photo Credit: did you know?

3. Lunch lady land

Photo Credit: did you know?

4. Get your sleep

Photo Credit: did you know?

5. Fire Mummies

Photo Credit: did you know?

6. Whoa…

Photo Credit: did you know?

7. I need a few of these

Photo Credit: did you know?

Are your eyes opened and your brain expanded? I thought so.

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12+ EMT’s Share Bad Emergency Medical Advice That People Should Stop Following

There’s a reason why doctors, nurses, and EMTs train and study for so long before they can do what they do, so you might want to listen closely to the advice these 15 EMT’s say you definitely should not take.

#15. If someone is having a seizure…

“If someones having a seizure you dont shove something into their mouth or try and hold them down. Thanks for that lie Hollywood, now a good portion of the population does the wrong thing when someones having a seizure.”

#14. Literally killing people.

“If ribs crunch during CPR you’ve pressed too hard and broken some ribs.

Nope, in some people you need to get passed them to pump the heart.

The myth of don’t do it too hard or you’ll give chest trauma is literally killing people. Well they’re already dead, but softy gentle hands made sure they stayed that way.

CPR is brutal. But you are trying to save a life. Don’t fuck around.

To completely contradict myself as we often do do… bad CPR is better than no CPR.”

#13. Not all hospitals are equal.

“Don’t argue about what hospital we say we should take you or your family member to. Not all hospitals are equal. Some are better for trauma, stroke, heart attacks, psych, etc. If it doesn’t matter I’ll ask if there is a hospital preference.”

#12. You’re more like a liability right now.

“If we take our time on scene it’s because we need to make more tests or we are actively treating the problem. No need to ask “omg why are you still here just take her and go”. There’s actually quite a lot we can do ourselves, at home, that’s the same as in the ER.

Defibrillation stops the heart in the hopes it starts again normally. You can’t shock someone back to life. If the machine says “no shock advised, start CPR”, just pump the chest until EMS arrives, the machine is working fine and in this case giving a shock to the patient would not work.

Hitting the chest dead center like in the movies is called a Precordial Thump, you give it once. It may work in specific circumstances in the immediate seconds after that circumstance happens. Just do CPR, plug the AED if available, forget what happens in the movies.

I don’t care if you’re an RN, MD, ABCXYZ. I got no way to check your credentials and you’re more like a liability right now. I absolutely love when medical professionals are there to provide useful and pertinent info, though. Information is always welcome, busybodies are not.

Can’t shock a flatline. See my second point.

Take a CPR class people, you’ll be able to ask all your questions to an instructor and you’ll learn lots of useful stuff.

When in doubt, call 911.”

#11. Until they’re down.

“I’m just an EMT student, but we learned that kids are not smaller adults, they’re like entirely different organisms. And when they are experiencing difficulty breathing, they cliffdive. Their bodies will compensate, compensate, compensa-oof they’re on the floor in respiratory arrest. Adults will circle the drain, you’ll see them steadily go from “i’m having trouble breathing” “i’m really having a hard time” “i dont…i dont feel so good” “huhhhhhhhhhh” and THEN they’ll pass out. Kids are good until they’re down.”

#10. A lot more harm than good.

“Someone drank or ate a poison/chemical – please don’t make them vomit it back up unless the substance is identified and a medical professional has specifically advised it. Can do a lot more harm than good.

People who have fallen or been in a car accident generally don’t need moving at all unless they are in absolute immediate danger. Same for removing helmets – if they can breathe ok then leave them where they are and keep an eye on them.

AEDs are super easy to use. They tell you exactly what needs to be done, and will only shock the patient if they need it – never be afraid to try one if someone is not breathing.

NEVER, ever remove an object from a wound – be it a knife, stick, pole, whatever – leave it in place! Pulling it out can get them killed very quickly. If they’re impaled upon an object don’t take them off – get objects and people to support their body weight until rescue arrives to cut the object.”

#9. We need to know.

“Do. Not. Lie. To. Us.

We do not have to and can not report to the police outside of very specific circumstances. We need to know if you were drinking. We need to know what drugs you were using. Gentlemen, we NEED to know if you are on erectile dysfunction medication. We ask these questions so we don’t do something that will kill you!

Also. Narcan. It is a wonderful, life saving drug. That being said, you will likely need more than one dose, don’t just give narcan call it good and leave someone who is overdosing. Keep in mind though it’s a double edged sword. If your person overdosing comes to there’s a good chance they’re going to be pissed and often times they get violent because all they really know is you ruined what was probably the best high of their life.”

#8. We don’t care what you are on.

“Only a student but with my expirance there’s two major things:

1: Drugs. We don’t care what you are on. If you are cooperative and aren’t aggressive there’s no need to get the police involved. But if you get defensive and try to arc up when we ask you to move your drugs to a different area so we can work that’s how you get the police involved and have to make your friend wait for medical attention.

2: Clarification. (This isn’t quite what you asked but it still needs to be said) Drugs are crazy things, both medical and recreational. If you are on either you need to tell us, emphasis on medical. Because if I ask you what you are taking at the moment it’s so they any other drugs I give you don’t make you blood pressure drop and make you drop along side of it. I need to know what medication you take and what other medical conditions you have and the quicker and easier you are able to explain that to me the quicker I can fix you and we can all go home.

Edit: Sorry for weird format, I’m on mobile.”

#7. Okay John Travolta.

“Someone who overdoes does not need a shot of adrenaline to the heart.

Had a guy yell and curse at me when his brother OD’d to give him an adrenaline shot. Okay John Travolta.”

#6. Listen to people.

“Several of these that come to mind:

One that hasn’t been said yet: listen to people. People with chronic conditions know what’s going on and can help you help themselves. I once had a patient with anxiety and asthma. She felt her anxiety building at her desk and mentioned it her co-worker/friend so that person could help her to an empty office to allow her to calm down. That person called 911 and alerted other co-workers which triggered 10 people to want to help. The Patient repeatedly told her co-workers to stop crowding her because her anxiety triggers her asthma. Simply listening to her could have saved her several breathing treatments and a trip to the hospital.
Not an “Emergency” but people still using rubbing alcohol or peroxides on minor cuts or scrapes. It’s been shown they can slow healing. A cut or scrape just needs to be washed thoroughly with a mild soap and water then bandaged. More contaminated wounds (gnarly road-rash) can be irrigated with clean water/iodine solution with about a Nalege’s worth of water.
Splashing or dumping water onto a person that is unconcious or “passed out.” Skin color/temperature/moisture can tell alot about a patient and having them covered in water can cause us to think differently about their etiology.
Some bystanders are scared or apprehensive about helping someone in cardiac arrest. You can help someone by doing early compressions. Most 911 operators now can instruct people on how to do compression only CPR until we arrive.”

#5. Pulling to the left is unsafe.

“If an ambulance is lights and sirens behind you, pull over to the RIGHT when safe and STOP as close to the right side as possible.
I don’t care if you’re intending to make a left turn in a block, pulling to the left is unsafe. You’re putting us into a very difficult position deciding whether to sit behind you til you figure it out, unsafely pass you on the right, or go into the oncoming lane.
And for the love of god do not slam on the breaks in the middle of the road. How can you think that’s a good idea? Why are you panicking? This can’t possibly be the most stressful situation you’ve ever been in.”

#4. On essential oils…

“Essential Oils don’t cure Jack shit.”

#3. Until they can get better care.

“CPR is to try to keep the victim alive until they can get to better care. It’s rarely successful. One of my buddies who is an EMT says of all the people he’s done CPR on, only 2 have walked out of the hospital. The rest died or became some form of vegetable.”

#2. Seriously. You’re going to drown them.

“This one’s for you, college students!

STOP POURING WATER DOWN YOUR BLACKOUT DRUNK FRIEND’S THROAT.

Seriously. You’re going to drown them.

You can worry about their hangover AFTER we’re sure they’re not about to sustain permanent brain damage or asphyxiate on their own puke.

As a rule of thumb, if they can’t drink on their own, it isn’t safe for you to do it for them.”

#1. Please stop.

“Please stop doing CPR on people who have fainted, it does nothing but create problems.

Also, not dangerous but please don’t call me nurse, and please don’t call my male crew mate doctor. I literally have Paramedic written on each shoulder.”

 

The more you know!

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