Category: Relationships

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Fascinating Tweets About Some Awful Dates

Raise your hand if you think dating is a really good time. I can’t actually see any of you, of course, but I’m going to go ahead and assume there no hands in the air right now. Dating is generally thought of a necessary evil, the sort of thing you hope turns out well but might be awful. The only upside to the awful is that it can result in a lot of great stories.

Twitter user @millercycle posed the following prompt to the internet at large:

There were hundreds of replies, and most of them were fascinating, cringy gold. Enjoy this selection of examples.

14. Moving on

Please don’t use a date as a therapy session.

13. Prison and a movie

This is the grossest show and tell I’ve ever heard of.

12. Insult to injury

This is called “negging” and it’s a pickup artist technique employed by douchebags. Never be this guy.

11. A taxing experience

I have so many followup questions for this one.

10. Extortion

Boy oh boy can money make people terrible.

9. Candid camera

Look, no kink-shaming but you need CONSENT from EVERYBODY.

8. The young and the restless

This is…concerning.

7. Literally Hitler

How is this even possible?

6. Drugs not hugs

Everybody knows you don’t do this ’till the third date.

5. B I T E

I really REALLY need to hear your worst story now.

4. Nec-romance

Weirdest. 3 way. Ever.

3. Distance

Welp. She’s a free spirit, we can give her that.

2. Stranded

As someone who recently visited Detroit, this is a fate worse than death.

1. Pickpocket

Welp. Run, I guess?

These stories are truly helping me feel better about the fact that I haven’t had a date in a while. I think I’ll just revisit them every time I need that boost. Thanks for validating my loneliness yet again, internet!

What was your worst date?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Fascinating Tweets About Some Awful Dates appeared first on UberFacts.

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True Stories About Some Very Bad Dates

You’ve had bad dates. We all have. There are more bad date stories in this world than there are people. The stories range from the truly abhorrent to the charmingly embarrassing to the downright bizarre, and we can’t seem to get enough of them.

Which is why I’d like to turn your attention to this gift of a thread kicked off by Twitter user @millercycle:

I’ve been combing through these replies for a while now and they’re incredible. Here are just a few of the highlights for your love-hate enjoyment.

13. I’m lovin’ it

To be fair, who has money in high school?

12. Breakdown breakup

Why do people just refuse to fix their cars sometimes?

11. Stuffed

That’s a swing and a miss for hoping she’ll have the same weird sensibilities as you, my dude.

10. Double date

This is literally a sitcom cliche, I refuse to believe this happened in real life.

9. Ex machina

There were soooo many stories like this in the thread.

8. Get out

I literally cannot think of a worse question to start a date with.

7. Wipeout

I…I just…what?

6. Pole position

That’s gonna be a yikes from me.

5. Making the cut

There’s a sentence in here which, I swear to you, you will not see coming.

4. Dine & dash

There’s no such thing as a free lunch.

3. Bee careful

That’s Barry B. Benson! You monster!

2. The grapes of wrath

Has this human ever humaned before?

1. The kiss

Maybe stop adopting such attractive dogs.

Welp, that was horrifying. There are so many of these stories I desperately want more information on but I’m simultaneously afraid to ask.

What was YOUR worst date story?

Tell us in the comments.

The post True Stories About Some Very Bad Dates appeared first on UberFacts.

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A Woman on Tinder Is Using Only ‘Twilight’ Quotes and the Results Are Pretty Funny

You might have heard of a little thing called Twilight – the books, the movies, or both. It’s been in the news again, as the author, Stephenie Meyer, is planning to release a long-awaited 5th book, Midnight Sun, in August 2020.

Which is to say, millions of people all over the world love Twilight and everything connected to it – but most people don’t go so far as to quote it exclusively on their Tinder profiles.

And I mean…based on these responses, you don’t really do it if you want to pique people’s interest, either. At least, not based on these 8 examples.

8. He bugged right the heck out.

Guy has no time to suffer fools.

Image Credit: Megi Meskhi

7. This guy definitely thinks a lot of himself.

I have to wonder whether or not its warranted.

Image Credit: Megi Meskhi

6. I’m guessing she just didn’t have time that day.

I’m surprised she has time any day.

Image Credit: Megi Meskhi

5. This dude just really wants some Thai food.

And also, oddly, to know where she lives.

Image Credit: Megi Meskhi

4. But the clear winner is this guy, who quoted Twilight right back.

I mean, I don’t know if he’s a WINNER but he’s a winner.

Image Credit: Megi Meskhi

3. This guy is a pretty good sport.

She should go out with this one.

Image Credit: Megi Meskhi

2.

1. He’s willing to play along.

Also he listens to J Timberlake, so, win.

Image Credit: Megi Meskhi

I guess this is what happens when you get on Tinder but don’t really care what comes of it?

Which I mean. Is probably the best way to do Tinder, right?

What do you think? Would you do something like this on Tinder? Let us know in the comments!

The post A Woman on Tinder Is Using Only ‘Twilight’ Quotes and the Results Are Pretty Funny appeared first on UberFacts.

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Roommates Who Are Trying Really Hard Right Now

Roommates. You can’t live with ’em, can’t live without ’em, because you’re way too poor to get your own place, am I right?

A lot of roommates are in a severe love/hate relationship right now, as a complete lack of absence makes the heart grow steadily more annoyed. That “spacious” apartment starts to feel a lot smaller when none of you ever go anywhere else.

The upside is, a lot of it is very funny.

15. The Hunt

If you drink booze on Easter is it Easter Eggnog?

My roommate picked up 2 cases of wine for me yesterday, proceeded to get blackout drunk and think it was Easter. I came home after work to find that he hid all 24 bottles through the apartment and he doesn’t remember where they are. Time for adult Easter egg hunting I guess ??‍♂️??‍♂️ from funny

14. Accidentally pwned

Maybe you should just switch over to playing Sorry.

13. Trash bash

It’s a sign.

Boyfriend’s roommates won’t take the trash out from funny

12. Kitchen trippin’

So apparently all I need to do to make my apartment less gross is get some psychedelics.

11. Business on top

Party on the bottom.

My roommates zoom meeting attire from funny

10. Listful thinking

Make sure you check it twice.

9. Buggin’ out

It’s April, fools.

Made a little paper cutout to give my roommate a good scare. April fools y’all. from funny

8. Distance cake

Whatever you do, for the love of God, don’t blow on it.

My roommate sang happy birthday from the other room after gifting this to me from funny

7. Flip the switch

Has science gone too far?

6. Safety first

I love you, you’re filthy, go clean.

Roommate framed a reminder at the front door from funny

5. Roll with it

Kinda rude to flaunt your wealth like that.

My roommates mom gave us an Easter basket full of toilet paper. from funny

4. iPhone X

I’m sure it’ll be patched soon.

Roommate said he’d fix my phone while I was at work. Thanks mate! from funny

3. Can’t handle it

Absolute classic.

Roommates getting bored during this quarantine. from funny

2. GTFO BF

Have you no standards at all?

1. Realization

Somewhere out there, someone is telling stories about you.

If you’re living with a roommate, cut ’em a little slack right now. No living arrangement is perfect, and we’re all just trying to make it through the day.

Also if my roommate is reading this: DRINK ANOTHER ONE OF MY DIET COKES AND I WILL LITERALLY MURDER YOU, I KNOW WHERE YOU SLEEP.

What’s your weird roommate story?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Roommates Who Are Trying Really Hard Right Now appeared first on UberFacts.

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Uplifting Tweets That Improved Our Day

Twitter can be a bit of a minefield. The ability to instantly lob whatever thought you might be having out into a massive public forum while safely protected behind a screen can lead to a lot of vitriol and chaos. But there’s a whole lot of wholesome coming down that pipeline too. And it’ll get you directly in the feels.

If you look around a little, you can find some very sweet tweets that remind you that, hey, people can be really kind, and that life maybe isn’t so bad. Take a look at 10 prime examples here.

10. Rosseroni

Just eat the devil out of it.

9. Getting stoked

You’re never out of the game.

8. I yam what I yam

Well that’s extravagantly adorable.

7. Piece of cake

It’s an absolute beauty.

6. Very happy hour

It’s where all the coolest cats hang out.

5. Trash talk

You tell ’em, kid.

4. Mr. F

This is an entirely new level of prank.

3. Goat & float

Come on in, the water’s fine.

2. Good girl

How could you even be sad when this doggo is a part of your life??

1. Young love

Sounds like you’ve got a keeper.

Remember, it doesn’t take a grand gesture to make someone’s day. It’s usually little things. Encouragement, affirmation, a small gift, a tiny little act of service. Even just sharing a bit of good news can have a significant impact on your friends and family, so keep reaching out. Keep spreading the good.

What’s the sweetest thing you’ve encountered recently?

Tell us all about it in the comments.

The post Uplifting Tweets That Improved Our Day appeared first on UberFacts.

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Families That Were Total Relationship Dealbreakers for People

When you’ve been dating someone for a while, at some point you will meet each other’s families. It’s usually not a huge deal (but bonus points if you really like them), but apparently sometimes it’s a total turnoff.

I would never have thought it, but these 12 stories totally changed my mind – I wouldn’t have stayed in these relationships either!

12. There’s definitely something not right there.

“I had a boyfriend who had a creepy habit of flirting with his mother. His mother was equally odd and made loud comments about my sex life with her son. She’d also ring me up to nag me into moving in with him. She was, in all honesty, one of the reasons I broke off the relationship.”

11. Oh my god, she was dating George Costanza!

“My ex’s family had this tradition of insulting the birthday boy/girl while they sat silently eating a slice of cake. The rules were you could say anything and they just had to take it. When it was my ex’s sister’s birthday, they said really awful things to her, then turned to me — as I sat there, shocked — and said, ‘Don’t you have anything to add? Play the game with us!’

I was like, ‘Nah, man. I just met all of you yesterday.’ I knew then that I never wanted to celebrate my birthday with them because it would end with me in tears. Luckily, he dumped me in front of my whole family about three months later (during our Christmas party!).”

10. That’s a double NO right there.

“I was about to have sex with a guy when his mother walked into his place to pick up his laundry.”

9. I’ve gotta think this was a sign.

“My ex left my birthday party because his mom called him and told him she wanted a pizza. He didn’t come back, either, even though he lived less than 10 minutes away.”

8. Definitely an awkward situation to walk into.

“This guy brought me home to meet his parents, but I wasn’t aware that they weren’t on board with his orientation. He introduced me to his mom, who stared daggers at me, as if to say, ‘Why the hell are you with my son?!’

When we went to his room to hang out, I could see he was texting his mom. They were texting in Spanish, which I can read, and she was pissed: ‘I forbid this. I am your mother!’”

7. I’m sorry, what was that?

“My boyfriend’s mom decided I was a witch because I gave him one of those cute little ‘voodoo’ dolls that were popular a while back. (It was themed for luck on exams because he was nervous about midterms.)

Apparently, the logical response to your son dating a witch was to have a family friend ceremoniously burn chicken bones and then stash them around your kid’s dorm to get rid of the girlfriend. I guess technically it worked?”

6. What kind of grown woman does this?

“My high school boyfriend’s mother referred to me as his ‘little whore.’ First of all — ew, slut shaming — but he was also the first boy I ever kissed and I was a virgin, so it was all very confusing.” 

5. That sounds unsanitary.

“They were massive hoarders! They had magazines piled up in their living room from 15 years before, and when they moved, they filled an ENTIRE 18-foot moving truck, four cars, and a pickup truck with their junk.

When I tried to convince them to get rid of some
old broken furniture, his dad snapped at me. They were convinced that when they died, their kids would be able to sell all the stuff and make a huge chunk of money.”

4. I can see how that happened.

 “I once dated a 25-year-old guy who told me that he enjoyed cuddling in bed with his 23-year-old sister. I always tried to forget it, but I never really could. It just spoiled the relationship for me.” 

3. She didn’t even feel bad. That’s diabolical.

“My partner’s mum was bitching about me on Facebook and didn’t realize I could see it. When I called her out on it, she said, ‘Oh well, shit happens.’” 

2. How does that even work?

“My ex’s mom reported me to the police for ‘kidnapping’ him when he came to my house once.” 

1. This just keeps getting worse.

“I once went on a couple dates with a guy on my block who I found out lived in a tiny studio apartment the size of a small single-car garage with his mom. He was 25 and they shared a bed.”

People are so awful, truly. I think I can never be more stunned by it, and then…

Has this ever happened to you?

Tell us the story in the comments!

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People Who Broke off Relationships After Meeting Their Partner’s Family

One of the big moments in any romantic relationship is being asked over to meet the other person’s family – one at a time or all at once, it can be a daunting experience.

Most people don’t expect that they will adore their partner’s family, every last one, but most of us also don’t go into the situation figuring they’re going to spell the end for your budding love affair.

For these 13 people, though, their partner’s family was a total dealbreaker.

13. This is the grossest thing I’ve read in a while.

“The first day I met my ex’s father, he bragged about how he left his ex-wife (my ex’s mom) because she wasn’t enough of a trophy wife for him, and that is what he deserved. He then told us his current girlfriend was originally his housekeeper, but he ‘just couldn’t keep his hands off of her.’”

12. I honestly don’t want to know the rest.

“His mother told me she’d always sort of had a crush on her own son — after admitting that he slept in her bed until he was 12, which was coincidentally when she got remarried.” 

11. He’s lucky he didn’t get punched in the face.

“My ex’s dad called me a ‘doxy’ while in an argument with my ex. After some googling, I found out it essentially means ‘whore.’” 

10. This is way too much information.

“After I slept with my ex for the first time, his mom said to me, ‘Doesn’t my son have a really big dick? His brothers’ aren’t that big, and he definitely didn’t get it from his dad.’”

9. I would have run away screaming, too.

“When I was 18, I met my boyfriend’s mother after a couple of weeks of dating him. She freaked out, told me I was the perfect girlfriend, and immediately started asking when we would get married.”

8. This is awful.

“He took me to meet his parents and neglected to tell them that I’m black. The looks of sheer horror on their faces made me want to leave immediately. Over dinner, his mom kept saying ‘I hope this food is alright, I don’t know what ‘you people’ eat’.

His dad asked what my parents do, I said dad is a welder and mom is a custodian at the high school. He responded with ‘typical.’ I stood up, walked out, and called my dad from a 7-11 pay phone. Never spoke to that guy again.”

7. It’s like a gender-swapped Jane Eyre.

“My ex’s dad lived in her attic. I only found out when I walked in on him using the bathroom (with the door open) in the middle of the night. I woke up my ex in a panic and said we needed to call the police because there was a strange man in her house, and she explained that it was her father. He never properly introduced himself beyond saying ‘Sorry we met ass-first,’ and everyone else acted like it was completely normal.”

6. Image the complexes she would give your future kids.

“My ex’s mom photoshopped my face in all of our pictures because I ‘just needed a few things fixed.’”

5. What is happening here?

“My ex’s mother referred to her ex-husband, son, and DOG as ‘my lover’ and every time we were over, she would insist on sitting in my ex’s lap on a loveseat across the room while I sat on the couch alone. No regrets on getting out of that one.”

4. She knew they were close but not close.

“I started dating one of my friend’s brothers. I knew my friend and her brother were close, but I didn’t know how close. The longer we dated, the creepier it got. The last straw was when a big incident happened at our house and he kissed her face all over and consoled her while she was crying instead of me.”

3. I would have left halfway through.

“When I first went over to my ex’s parents’ house for dinner, I did the polite thing and offered to help clean up after eating. I ended up doing all the washing up for a six-person dinner alone.”

2. This sounds completely gross and unsanitary.

“My ex’s parents had 20+ dogs. The dogs were split into three groups which could not mingle without attacking the other groups. At any given time, I was suffocated by at least seven dogs in their tiny, cluttered house. They had to rotate the groups of dogs through the designated sleep, eat, and potty areas. You can probably imagine how well that went.”

1. That girl needs some therapy.

“My ex’s sister told me she’d break my neck if I didn’t like her, and his mom said I was pretty but would be prettier if i got a nose job.” 

These are just awful and I cannot believe people like this exist in the world.

Has anything like this ever happened to you?

If so, please share the story with us in the comments!

The post People Who Broke off Relationships After Meeting Their Partner’s Family appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Are Eating up This Cute Friendship Between a Hedgehog and a Cat

Who says different kinds of animals can’t be best friends? I personally don’t believe that for a second.

And here’s the proof.

Meet Herbee the hedgehog and Audree the cat. They’re BFF even though they have nothing in common the surface.

The dynamic duo lives in Germany and their owner, Talitha Girnus, keeps followers updated on their lives. And the photos are wonderful!

Follow the adventures of these two unlikely friends on their Instagram page!

Enjoy!

1. There they are!

Climb aboard, friend!

2. Best friends forever.

You’ve seen that look before…

3. All snuggled up.

These two are inseparable.

View this post on Instagram

How do you say “friend“ in your language? ??⠀ ⠀ ⠀ The new Mr.Pokee Presets are now available! The link to get them is in our Bio! These are the new Preset Packs:⠀ ⠀ ✨ Mr.Pokee Presets “Essentials II“ – Herbee & Audree ✨⠀ This pack of photo filters is the second edition of the “Essentials“ pack. It includes all presets that we have been using on our current and latest photos of Herbee & Audree in the past few months. I have optimized the colors and lightening and gave the photos a new sort of retro vibe. They’re especially made for travel and outdoor photos! ?⠀ ⠀ ✨ Mr.Pokee Presets “Home Sweet Home“ ✨⠀ We donate 50% of profits of this Preset Pack to help Italian Hospitals in the current crisis. Why Italy? Ever since I was a little girl my parents took me to Italy and I personally feel very connected to this country. Pokee, Herbee and Audree have all been to Italy and it's our pleasure to return something to this beautiful country and the people we love so much!⠀ ♡⠀ The focus of this pack is indoor photos. While we're currently all staying at home and can't go outside or travel much, I think this pack will be most useful to you at the moment. I hope I can somehow make your days more interesting and help you learn something new during this time ♥⠀ ⠀ ✨ Mr.Pokee Presets “Spring“ ✨⠀ The focus of this pack is on the warmth of light colors. These Photo Filters will make your spring photos come alive, bring the colors in harmony and give them a flowery feeling ?⠀ ⠀ ⠀ We also made some Single Presets available at a cheaper price for those of you who might like to try them out first or just want a certain preset, but not the entire pack!! It took me a lot of time to create and optimize them for you!! So, I hope you love them even more than you liked the first ones! ?☀⠀ ⠀ Ps. If you have questions, DM me here @mr.pokee.presets and I will be happy to help you out!! ?⠀ ⠀ **This photo is edited with the Preset “Double the Cuteness“ from the Essentials II**

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4. Going on adventures together!

They’re exploring the great outdoors.

View this post on Instagram

Update: Congrats to the winners @nathangelique @gillianbakx & @ashleygalarneau ? Thanks everyone for joining & don’t be sad if you didn’t win this time!! There will be more giveaways soon! ?⠀ ___________________________________________⠀ ⠀ Giveaway! The new Mr.Pokee Presets are coming on Saturday ? and we’re giving them away to THREE of you before they launch!⠀ ⠀ There will be 3 new Packs available: the “Mr.Pokee Essentials II (Herbee & Audree)”, a Spring Pack and the “Home Sweet Home” Pack. I will donate 50% of this pack to support hospitals in Italy! Lots of you also requested single presets. So, for the first time I will make some of these available if you don’t want to shop the entire pack! ?⠀ .⠀ To enter the Giveaway:⠀ 1. Follow @mr.pokee.presets and @mr.pokee⠀ 2. Tag one friend per comment. Each new friend that you tag is a new entry.⠀ ⠀ The 3 winners will each receive ALL of the new Presets and will be chosen and announced on Thursday, April 9 in this post and in the story. Good luck!! ?

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5. Taking in a Disney movie.

A little downtime for these two so the can kick back.

6. Do you see what I see?

These two really do have a lot of fun together.

7. Soaking up the sunshine.

They look perfectly content.

8. It’s almost bedtime…

So tell me a story!

9. How do you like your coffee?

With a dash of hedgehog, perhaps?

10. A meeting of the minds.

What do you think they’re discussing?

11. Like I said, best friends forever and always.

I just love these little guys!

View this post on Instagram

Have a cozy Sunday ??

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Aren’t those two just great!

It gives you a little hope in the world when you see something like this…or at least it does for me.

Do you know of any other great social media accounts that feature unlikely animal combinations who live together and are good friends?

If so, please share them with us in the comments.

We can’t get enough of this stuff!

The post People Are Eating up This Cute Friendship Between a Hedgehog and a Cat appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Tell Their Stories About How They Attract Weird People

Some folks just attract them for some reason or another…I’m talking about weird people who always come into their lives for one reason or another.

It could be work-related, it might be friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, next-door neighbors, etc.

Some people just have that laser beam attached to them that makes weirdos come into their life.

Folks on AskReddit shared their stories.

1. Run away from this one.

“There was a guy I met online and we talked for a while. As far as I was concerned we were just friends. One day he said he had spent all night drawing something for me and said he hoped I liked it, and he sent a picture of me that he had taken from my Instagram and clearly put through an art filter to make it look like a sketch. It was so obvious.

I tried to gently point it out and he started going into the details of what kinds of pencils he used and all that. I ended up finding the exact filter he used and called him out and he freaked out on me saying I was ungrateful and untrustworthy and that I had cheated on my boyfriend at the time by being friends with him, and that even if I was the last girl on earth he wouldn’t be interested in me.

It was truly bizarre.”

2. Where should I start?

“Where to even start?

There’s the girl who faked pregnancies a few times a year for the better part of a decade, had an “astral baby” that she and her “medium” boyfriend could communicate with, and then finally got pregnant for real and immediately had the kid taken away from her.

There’s the guy who cancelled his Swedish citizenship to move to the Netherlands to be with a girl he had known for a few months, only for the relationship to end a few months later.

He is now back in Sweden and mooching off of a friend, and refusing to even try to get a job or study something out of fear of being seen as normal. He also can’t quite seem to grasp the concept of basic personal hygiene.

There’s the couple who were convinced they were getting visions of a war in Heaven and that the three of us were meant to write the new Bible.

There’s the girl who idolizes Southern American culture, self-identifies as a redneck, decorates her home with the confederate flag, enjoys dressing up as a cowboy and/or a pirate to work (she’s a bus driver), including once bringing a toy gun.”

3. Did you take it?

“During a trip to Home Depot, Santa Claus offered me a job as a marijuana farmer.”

4. Can’t believe you turned him down.

“A guy who sent me nudes of his ex gf and asked me to help him spread the nudes because she cheated on him.

And he asked me to be his new GF… No thank you.”

5. A sad situation.

“I have a fan at work. She is clearly mentally ill, probably schizophrenic. I am always nice to her, my Brother is schizophrenic and I would hope people still treat him like a person.

Then, it started going too far. She would call me at work. Dropped by all the time. Told me that I am her daughter. Forbade me from dating black men? I’m wondering if she’ll come find me once quarantine is over.”

6. At the gas station.

“Whooo boy, lots of weirdos when you work at a gas station.

When I was working at one I had this chronically drunk guy who came in all the time with his shirt buttoned up crooked if it was buttoned at all. His fingers were twisted at weird angles, looked like he punched a lot of things while drunk and never had them set right, they were a mess.

He always slurred about how none of the girls thought he was cute anymore. One day he gave me a cassette tape and said he was dedicating the song “Every Woman in the World” to me. You read that right, it was an Air Supply cassette tape. It was the early 2000’s and I felt like I’d been thrown back to the ’80’s. I told him I could not accept his gift and gave it back.”

7. Here come the weirdos.

“In high school the hardcore weirdos tended to find me. I remember a girl trapping me in a conversation where she told me (quite seriously, I might add) that she had an alternate personality living in her head, and he was Jeff the Killer. She was highly disgusted to find out I didn’t know about creepypasta and didn’t care to.

In college I fell in with a bunch of high-drama folks in my writing classes who called themselves empaths and would occasionally fight amongst themselves and say stuff like ‘I could feel Tanya ripping herself out of my face last night.’

They also talked about projecting themselves into the astral plane and gaining clairvoyance. Worst part was I wanted so badly to be like them that I talked like that for a bit, too.”

8. Total freak.

“Girl who left one of those hamster ball things on my doorstep (never told her my address). It was filled with literally hundreds of hand written notes, most of which had generic uplifting quotes, but some were direct quotes from me, from over six months ago.

Meaning from the day I met her, she was writing down and recording things I’d said. For anyone thinking this was actually romantic and sweet, we were in no way romantically involved, we just had a class together. Things got worse from there.”

9. Let’s hear it!

“It’s my time to shine! In my 28 years of living I have attracted:

– The LARPer who exclusively lived off of kraft singles, eggs, white bread, frozen cheese ravioli, and multiple gallons of milk. He also believed he was a demon? If the moon was full we couldn’t have sex because he may bite me and ravage me to death.

– The Vore Guy. I mentioned once how as a preteen I used to do Harry Potter RP on Livejournal and he took it as invitation to introduce me to his fantasy based vore RP. I cannot unsee some details he wrote.

– The guy who wore vampire fangs to our first and only date. Unprompted, unasked, just a pair of vampire fangs.

– The guy who wore nails poking out of his baseball cap, and a trench coat. His teeth were rotting out/black and he honestly looked like he rolled out of some backwater family in a Rob Zombie movie.”

10. Let’s go down the list…

“Weird people I’ve attracted include:

A woman (now in her 30s) who believed she had people from other universes living in her head. She also claimed to be a reincarnated elf who was married to Gohan. They had a baby together.

She no longer claims to either of these, but now believes she has DID, that Loki (who of course looks like Tom Hiddleston) spies on her in the shower, and that fairies lived in the yard her childhood home.

Her girlfriend who claimed to be aromantic, despite being in a relationship with her. She also had people from other universes living in her head. Both sets of people were dating. (I was friends with these women for eight years.)

A guy who claimed to be a literal galaxy. He went by “Prince 81″ because he was a prince, and also the Messier 81 galaxy.

His boyfriend who claimed to be Loki, a sheepdog, and a Time Lord. When they broke up, in true Tumblr Fashion™, both sides accused people of abuse.

A woman who believed that she had been abducted by aliens as a child.”

11. Won’t be ordering food from there anymore.

“Use to order food from this pizza place in town almost everyday. Had the same delivery guy for months. Was nice to the guy but never said more than pleasantries to him.

One day a woman dropped off the order instead. Told me the delivery guy was her BF. Causally brought up the fact that they thought I was cute and wanted to have a threesome. Might be the weirdest conversation of my life. Never ordered there again.”

12. Sounds like a catch.

“A guy sent me a drink from the opposite side of the bar.

10 minutes later, he got thrown out for pissing on the bar.

I get the good ones.”

13. Cult activity.

“Well we can start with the time I unknowingly was going to help start a cult. There was this guy around town everyone knew that considered himself “enlightened”. If you could get past his ego some of his perspectives were kinda interesting and he talked to trees and I was going through my festival, flow toys, drugs phase.

I got invited over to his house one day and there was a group of like 6 of us maybe and he started taking us through all this sort of ceremonial shit like smoking a peace pipe and going through all this explanation about how he chose us specifically and we were going to help him open “portals” around town.

At one point one of his other friends showed up and he made him leave saying his heart wasn’t open enough yet or something. Would love to know what I did to show him I was worthy. Ended with him making us put our hands in a tub of crystals and water and repeat some mantras or something with him.

Was kinda scared to leave while all this was happening honestly and noped out right after.”

14. The one that got away.

“I dated a girl (briefly) who I saw in the newspaper fours years later who was caught in a 20 person drug ring.”

15. Stay away from this one.

“Theres this guy I know that is a to-be serial killer/pedophile. He is 24.

Now, this guy may just be talking a “big game”, but hes just an idiot. I remember him saying something about kill his family cat. Along with that, he has no problem killing small animals, from what I know.

He got hired on as a camp counselor for small children. He tells us through text message that he was talking to this little girl about sacrificial rituals, and how they could sacrifice frogs and other small animals together.

He then started going into detail on how he thinks this little girl has a crush on him, and that he thinks he “enjoys it when they like him”. The wording he used at the time was the biggest red flag to us.

I asked my boss at the time about it, and explained what text messages my wife just recieved. He even told me to take 5 minutes from work right at that moment, and call the camp and tell them about the messages on my wife’s phone.

20 minutes later we get a message saying he was fired and he does not understand why. He also somehow figured out that it was us that told his work about it.

Apparently we ruined the relationship he had with the children. Yep. THAT is what he was worried about.

God, fuck him.”

As I always like to say, there are a lot of weirdos out there!

Now we want to hear your stories!

In the comments, tell us about some of the strange folks you’ve had to deal with in your life.

We’d love to hear from you!

The post People Tell Their Stories About How They Attract Weird People appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

People Talk About the Traits That Make People Attractive… Regardless of Gender

Some features just look good on people, regardless of their gender.

Nice eyes, a full head of hair, a great set of abs, a funny personality, a caring nature.

All the good stuff!

AskReddit users shared their thoughts about what features they think are hot on a person, and they’re talking about ANY person.

1. This is very true.

“Personality.

A charming person is charming no matter what. Certain kinds of personalities are fucking hot.”

2. You need to smell good.

“A good smell is so attractive.

And it’s so personal as well. Even an otherwise really attractive person is not attractive to me anymore if they don’t smell right.”

3. This is crucial.

“Definitely humor.

When you have the same sense of humor as someone else and you can just feel the click, that’s an amazing feelings.”

4. A good hugger is hard to find.

“Hugs, but like the kind that are just really warm and genuine…the kind that breathe life into somebody.”

5. Nice and simple.

“ROLLED. UP. SLEEVES.

Hot on anyone and everyone, in my opinion.”

6. This is important.

“Passion.

When someone speaks about something they’re really passionate about I can sit down and talk with them for hours. Just to hear them speak about it.”

7. Be kind.

“Genuine kindness.

Anyone who is kind from the bottom of their heart is undeniably attractive.”

8. Don’t be boring.

“Opinions, thoughts about things, curiosity.

Really dull people are a total waste of time.”

9. It’s a rush.

“A good singing voice.

A lot of singers are okay but there are a few that certain parts of their songs will give me that same rush like someone kissing my neck.”

10. Good qualities.

“Quick wit.

Being nice.

Authentic.”

11. All animals need love.

“Liking most animals in general instead of them saying “iM a DoG pERsoN CauSE cATs DoNt LoVe YOu” or “Im A CaT pERsoN CaUSe DoGs ARe DiRtY””

12. Please be weird.

“Definitely authenticity. I don’t want an Instagram clone!

Tell me about your niche hobbies and interests! Be the weirdo you are on the inside!”

13. Getting knocked down.

“Good attitude/sense of humor.

You could be a ten, but if you have a shit attitude you’re knocked down to a 3 REAL quick.”

14. This is key.

“Confidence.

Being sure of yourself goes a long way. It comes across in how someone walks, talks, wears clothes. Even someone who is not traditionally attractive can become so through confidence.”

15. Treat them well.

“I pay attention to how people in particular, treat their service staff.

Saying “please” and “thank you” to your waiter is definitely nice to see in a person.”

16. Work hard!

“If we’re talking about strictly relationships and not just random hookups then, work ethic.

Relationships require teamwork and I’ll be damned if I’m the only one bringing home the bacon.

Hard work and motivation is hot.”

17. Now that is hot.

“Emotional intelligence and communication skills.

If you can tell me what you’re feeling during a disagreement without being hurtful, and can also tell me what you’re feeling and what feels good………that’s hot.”

People are speaking the truth in those comments, no doubt about it.

What about you?

What do you think are attractive features on someone, regardless of gender?

Talk to us in the comments!

The post People Talk About the Traits That Make People Attractive… Regardless of Gender appeared first on UberFacts.