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15 Problems People Have in 2019 That Just Weren’t a Thing in 1989

1989 was a good year (and a good album, T Swift). Things were simpler, we were all less connected, and it was a lot easier to turn off once we left work for the day.

So much easier.

But that’s just the start – here are 15 other 2019 problems that weren’t a thing in 1989.

#15. Texting and driving.

Texting and driving.

Edit: distracted has for sure been a thing ever since there was something possible to drive. Specifically though, texting and driving became more and more of a problem as texting got cheaper and easier.

#14. Airport security.

Waiting in line to go through airport security.

#13. Toilet reading.

Being in the toilet without your phone lol I can’t count the number of shampoo bottles I read in the 80’s and 90’s.

#12. Unplugging my book.

having to unplug my book so that I can charge my cigarette.

#11. You flip it over.

Putting a USB in but it dosen’t work so you flip it over and realize you had it right the first time

#10. Used to be you could be left alone.

Being left the fuck alone. Used to be you could disappear for the day and nobody was getting a hold of you until you came home.

#9. Can I come see the cockpit?

Captain…..can I come see the cockpit?

#8. No adult supervision.

Kids under 10 years old being out and about with no adult supervision

#7. The best vacations.

Always being “reachable.” I cannot count the number of times when my wife would call and I don’t answer (for whatever reason). She calls back 5 minutes later like ‘where have you been!?’

Some of my best vacations have been ones with no cell service.

#6. Ohhh…

Having a drink with Bill Cosby.

You wouldn’t think back then anyway.

#5. No i-home.

Your home deadbolt lock running out of batteries

#4. No smoking.

It blew my mind when my mom told me that the hospital asked if she wanted a smoking or non smoking room when she had me.

And people used to smoke while they shopped for groceries. Just flicking ashes on the floor like it’s no big deal.

#3. Ring ring.

Phone going off in a movie theater.

#2. A million dollars.

Trying to retire comfortably on a million dollars.

#1. Because you said the wrong thing.

Having millions of people you’ve never met actively trying to dig up dirt on you and generally ruin your life because you said the wrong thing.

The 80s might not really have been the good ‘ol days, but one thing’s for sure – life will probably never be that simple again.

Until the apocalypse, anyway.

The post 15 Problems People Have in 2019 That Just Weren’t a Thing in 1989 appeared first on UberFacts.

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15 Movie Buffs Reveal the Opening Scenes That Lured Them in Best

There’s a theory among writers that if you don’t hook someone by the end of the first page, you might never get another chance – because they’ll stop reading (or watching) and try something else.

According to these movie buffs, though, you’ll be hooked from the very first scene of these 15 movies.

#15. Just perfect.

Kill Bill vol 1. The music as well that went with it ‘bang bang ‘ by nancy sinatra is just perfect

#14. The fight at the rave.

The opening scene of Blade, with the fight at the rave.

#13. Iconic.

The Lion King.

#12. Deliver us.

The opening scene of The Prince of Egypt. “Deliver Us”

#11. The tension and terror.

Scream.

The tension and terror were built up perfectly and the eventual killing of Drew Barrymore’s character was shocking. Not just in its brutality (which was quite graphic for its time), but because such a major name was killed off that soon into a movie. The opening kill is a tried and true horror trope, but it had never been done before with such a big name so early in a film.

For the rest of the film, every time you saw a big name show up (Neve Campbell, David Arquette, Courtney Cox), you weren’t sure if they were going to make it to the end of the film or not.

#10. So eerie.

Jaws. So eerie. The bright moonlight shining down on the ocean and a swimming girl. And then the ocean is empty again.

#9. American Psycho.

.. I’m 27 years old. I believe in taking care of myself, and a balanced diet and a rigorous exercise routine. In the morning, if my face is a little puffy, I’ll put on an ice pack while doing my stomach crunches. I can do a thousand now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial masque which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine.

I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion. There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman. Some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me. Only an entity. Something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours, and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable, I simply am not there.

#8. The Last Alliance.

The Last Alliance of Elves and Men, from “Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring”.

#7. Shoot her!

Because I just saw it last night: Jurassic Park.

“SHOOT HER! SHOOOOOOT HER!”

#6. It set the mood.

A Clockwork Orange.

It set the mood for that entire movie.

#5. It just takes off.

The “Dawn of the Dead” remake was one of my favorite opening scenes. When the little neighbor girl comes in their bedroom and bites the husband, shit just takes off and it is an intense ride. Really got me into the movie.

#4. An overwhelmingly sad story.

It’s going to sound weird, but The Rescuers. I hadn’t seen that movie in about a decade-and-a-half when I picked up the Blu-Ray during a local sale. I… was also rather smashed when I was watching it. Anyway, I’m watching it after a few drinks when the opening comes on.

It’s almost like how, when you’re a kid and you don’t realize that you’ve heard what is an adult joke because you were too pure and innocent? Well… as an adult, it truly hits just how overwhelmingly sad the story is, especially since the opening song, “The Journey” is almost like a lament. This is a young child who was taken against her will, in a situation where she could most certainly die and a note in a bottle is honestly her only real chance of escape.

I admit, I definitely cried the next few times I watched that movie. The same for the scene after Medusa insults Penny, although that was more due to pure rage.

#3. Cool.

Hot Rod.

“Kevin, did you reinforce the takeoff ramp?”

“No, we didn’t have time.”

#2. Super intense.

28 Weeks Later has an amazing longer opening but it is super intense and really sets the tone for an average movie

#1. “As far back as I can remember…”

Goodfellas

“As far back as I could remember, I always wanted to be a gangster…”

You’ll have to give them all a try for yourself!

The post 15 Movie Buffs Reveal the Opening Scenes That Lured Them in Best appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Share What Happened When They Screwed up in Boot Camp

Do you like getting screamed at? Made to do any number of insane things because you smiled? Then you should join the military!

Yes, it’s a VERY crazy experience, but most people don’t know HOW crazy it can get.

These 15 people really screwed up in boot camp (or saw somebody who did) and have some amazing tales to share.

Enjoy!

1. Hey! That’s cheating!

My uncle was a DI and he used to tell us that he would Scotch Guard the inside of all his clothes so that he wouldn’t show sweat.

Then he would run with the recruits and badger them for being so fat and out of shape since they were already covered in sweat.

2. Six Six Six

We used to have brutal room inspections at this certain time of year for the freshmen at the Air Force Academy. My buddy came in and asked how wide the bed folds needed to be. The freshman said, six inches.

My buddy pulled out a Subway sandwich and asked, “What’s this?”

“A six-inch sub, sir.”

“Then it ought to match right?”

“Yes, sir!”

He unwrapped it and set it down, but it matched perfectly. So he picked it up, took a huge bite out of it, and set it back down. Then he screamed at the kid because it no longer matched.

3. By the power of Greyskull!

I was on the shooting range pulling targets for fellow recruits when my drill instructor, a seasoned combat vet from Alabama who looked like Skeletor, snuck up behind me.

Now he hated me, but on this particular day, as he was behind me, I stepped back and bumped into him. He turned with his face lit up and he screamed. Panicking, I did what felt natural and let out the loudest roar I could. He turned red, put his face in his hat as all the recruits started laughing.

After we all settled down, he told me if I ever did that again he’d throw my gear behind the safety line and order me to retrieve it. Basically a death sentence for those unfamiliar with a range.

4. Bugging out

I went to USAF basic training. I’m deathly afraid of wasps (I ran into a wasp nest as a kid). I was standing in attention practicing for the parade. A wasp flew in front of me. I started flailing around wildly. Every drill sergeant within eyeshot came over.

I did a lot of pushups.

5. Airing your dirty laundry…

I was in basic training for the AF and we had two separate laundry bags.

Very specific clothing went into the green cloth bag and the black mesh bag. Dirty black socks belonged in the mesh bag.

Well, our TI was trashing our bay because it was what they did and he started opening laundry bags. My buddy had his socks in the wrong bag.

So the TI made him wear them like sock puppets and march around the bays chanting “Dirty black socks belong in the mesh bag.”

6. Seal of approval

When I was in recruit training, a girl was up on the quarterdeck getting smoked for something.

She eventually got to the point where she couldn’t do any more push-ups, so she just flopped down on the ground. The drill instructor yelled at her to get back up, so she tried to push back up, but couldn’t get her hips up off the ground with the rest of her.

The drill instructor said, “If you want to look like a seal, I guess you better start barking like one.’

The girl got real quiet despite the drill instructor yelling louder and louder and eventually getting up in her face. Finally, she yells out, “This recruit doesn’t know what a seal sounds like!”

That’s how all forty of us in that platoon ended up on the ground, barking like seals, to show her how to do it.

7. WHAT DO YOU MEME?

Navy boot camp. My mom sent me a huge photo mailer full of memes. Like 3×5 glossy memes from the Wal Mart photo center. And there were like, 200.

When you get photos, your RDCs need to see and approve of them. My third RDC isn’t up on internet culture and he started going through the photos one at a time, taking his time.

He picked up part of the stack and after about a minute, yelled, “THESE ARE ALL MEMES.” He was angry, but he couldn’t do anything but keep going. The other recruits started to gather around and go through the approved stack. It was a bit embarrassing, but the barracks were a joyous place that evening.

Three memes were not approved.

8. Buttoned up

Back when I was in basic training, our DI informed us that the buttons on our tops were specifically shaped so that if it was needed, a medic could grab the bottom of the top, pull up, and all the buttons would undo.

Upon hearing this, one of the privates I was with looked down, grabbed the bottom of his top, and pulled.

All the buttons ripped off their threads and fell to the ground, and he was left without a shirt for the rest of the morning.

The DI basically keeled over laughing as we all watched.

9. Just breathe!

I had some very old school, very non-PC NCO’s in my platoon (as is, in many combat arms units).

We had a known knucklehead standing in the formation one day while everyone was at attention waiting for the morning calls. He was holding a potted plant to his side.

I went up to the soldier before the top came out and quietly asked him why in the green thumb he was holding that plant in my formation. The little guy yelled at the top of his lungs: “To replace the oxygen I am wasting, Platoon Sergeant!”

It took every ounce of military bearing in my person to not lose it laughing. l had to later, very amusedly, tell my sergeants to keep their shenanigans to a minimum during formations.

10. I tree what you did there…

I rarely raised my voice.

That said, I would occasionally walk up to a private and say, “Private, you see the tree over there? Go make it happen!”

I’d watch with great glee at what would happen next. Some would do push-ups in front of it, some would stand at attention in front of it, but most would look around in ever increasing confusion and terror as I came storming over, yelling.

It was always hilarious.

11. Maybe he won’t notice…

During the final inspection, I had to go down the ranks with one of the drill sergeants and inspect the soldiers one by one while they stood at attention in their class A uniforms. I had to inspect their appearance, ask some questions about their weapons or the general orders, stuff like that.

While moving down the line, I turned to face one soldier. There he was, standing at attention proud as can be. But his uniform had no brass buttons. My best guess is someone stole his buttons the night before. But there he was standing there with his perfect military bearing. I imagine he was hoping I wouldn’t notice or something.

I was doing everything I could do to keep my military bearing because I wanted to bust out laughing so badly. I was afraid if I opened my mouth to ask a question I would start laughing so I just looked at him all mean like (which is laughable itself), sighed, and shook my head slowly in disappointment and moved onto the next soldier.

12. Oh FORK it!

My buddy dropped a fork in the chow line.

The DS made him yell, “I’M SORRY FORK” for like ten minutes.

13. The wonderful, weirdo named Wu

We had this kid named Wu.

Now Wu was the kind of guy that should have never joined the Marines. But here he was.

Even simple things like not running into the Company Commander was too difficult for him.

So the Drill Instructors labeled him a hazard, and as a hazard, he had to make sure people were aware. Thus, every time he walked or ran he would need to verbally make sure people knew by going, “BEEP BEEP BEEEEP!”

We got torched so many times for cracking up at that. Just imagine: it’s the middle of the night and you’re trying to sleep, then all of a sudden you hear some shuffling and then “BEEP BEEEEP BEEEEP!” As Wu walked to the toilet to pee.

14. Smoke show

I remember a kid getting smoked for a solid 30 minutes.

They made him do mostly push-ups. When he finally broke, of the DI’s asked him why he was crying and he started shouting, “I’m not crying, my eyes are sweating!”

I saw the campaign cover come down in chuckles for a moment before the DI said, “Get up, you’re done.”

15. Bad at bikes

My dad was a company commander, the navy’s drill sergeants.

He told a recruit to jump on a bicycle and deliver something. The guy jumped on the bike, took off for about 40 yards in a wide-open paved area where the recruits marched and then he fell over.

My dad went out and asked him what happened and he said he didn’t know how to ride a bike.

I almost joined the military. Almost.

Looks like I dodged a bullet!

The post People Share What Happened When They Screwed up in Boot Camp appeared first on UberFacts.

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Parents Share the Advice They Want Teenagers to Hear and Remember About Life

There are actually a lot of parents out there that just want to make sure that teenagers know they’re not alone in this crazy world.

The question asked was this: Parents of reddit, what’s something that you think teenagers need to hear?

If you’re a teenager or a parent, take a read. There’s some great advice in here.

1. College dayzzz…

You don’t HAVE to go to college. And you also don’t have to NOT go if you don’t know what to do with your life. You’ll figure it out, maybe get inspired by your classes.

And, as long as it will not launch you into a huge debt, it IS ok to Major in something you might not end up getting a career in. (To an extent).

College is more than career training. It’s a much bigger learning experience about… everything! People, the world, yourself. Don’t dig a debt, work very hard, have lots of fun, and try to keep your eyes on a career path, but also absorb everything like a sponge.

2. Social media tips

If social media makes you feel shitty, just stop.

It makes everyone feel shitty — even the people whose lives seem so much better and glamorous than yours. Chances are, they’re posting that stuff to not feel shitty too.

Remember, everyone is posting their Greatest Hits. Remember, everybody poops — even the girl posting glam pics from Greece, she probably pooped right before or after the pic. Point is, don’t get wrapped up in that.

Take a month or two break from social media and see how you feel.

3. High school really isn’t a big deal

I hated when people told me, “you won’t even miss high school when you’re older.”

I did, for a little bit. And now, I really don’t.

As important as it is as a state of your pre-adulthood, in the big scheme of things, it’s just a tiny chapter. So don’t get hung up on the mistakes you made or the drama you had.

Appreciate the experience for what it gave you, and move on.

4. No phones when driving. Seriously.

Please put your phone away in the car. Even at stoplights. Just wait until you arrive. You may be super used to it, but it only takes one second of inattention to become potentially fatal.

Someone just died in my neighborhood for this very reason.

Sending a snap.

It can wait.

5. Money, money, money

Teach yourself personal finance basics.

Your school and maybe parents probably neglected this, if times haven’t changed all that much. But… The internet is wonderful! You can teach yourself. Take an edX or Kahn or iTunesU course. Learn the basics and start saving. Really truly understand student loans before taking them.

And save. Saving sounds like something you have plenty of time for later… when you make more money… but tomorrow never comes. Learn and save now.

6. Those pesky social skills…

There’s nothing wrong with not liking to talk to people as long as you’re friendly.

Don’t force yourself to be talkative just because others want you to be. You’ll still need to learn social skills like gauging trustworthiness, effective communication, and helpfulness.

However, you don’t need to force yourself to be talkative to be socially adept; you just have to be mindful.

7. Drama

Your emotions won’t be this intense forever. But they are real and valid.

My parents always invalidated my feelings — too dramatic, it’s just your hormones, you’ll grow out of it, you don’t know how good you have it — while on some base level they possibly were right, it didn’t mean my feelings weren’t real and intense in that moment.

Allow yourself to feel what you feel. But don’t wallow or feed the Depression Kitty.

It DOES get better.

8. You’ll always be our child…

That we miss you & we actually want to spend time with you, not because of how you were (our little boy/girl) but because we are in awe of who you are and want to get to know you better. So you know we love you unconditionally but also that it’s ok and fun to hang out sometimes.

Soon you’ll be leaving home, time passes quickly, and we want to create as many good memories as we can for you so you can use them for when the world is not so kind and I’m not around to give you a hug.

You’re amazing, you’ve always been and I know your life will be filled with ups and downs but I hope the love we share reminds you that you’ll always have a soft spot to land

9. Making babies…

Just because you pop out a baby doesn’t mean it’ll keep your SO around and at times it’ll make them break up with you. To that part, just because you have the kid doesn’t mean it’ll unconditionally love you, especially when you’re a shitty parent.

These are things my idiotic friends had made when we were young, choosing to get knocked up at a wrong time in life has shaken lives to rubble at points.

10. Take care of your health

Build good health habits now. If you’re not already active, find a simple active hobby you can do.

Take up Pokemon Go or take up bike riding or something. Also, learn how to cook some basic and healthy meals like chicken pesto pasta or fried rice.

The healthier you are as a teen the easier it is to stay healthy as an adult.

11. Rebel, rebel…

Go ahead and be rebellious, it’s part of growing up.

But please be safe while you are doing it! Use the condom, don’t depend on your date for transportation until you know them, tell someone where you are so we know how to get to you in an emergency, keep your phone charged, ask for help if needed.

12. The social scene…

None of social-structure/drama shit is going to matter once you’re out of school so don’t worry about what others think.

You just do you.

13. Beer?

It’s completely legal for a teenager to buy all the equipment and ingredients to make beer.

Just saying.

My two cents… personal finance is huge. They more you save now, the more you’ll have down the road.

Money won’t buy happiness, but it can sure buy a lot of therapy. And everybody needs somebody to talk to now and then.

The post Parents Share the Advice They Want Teenagers to Hear and Remember About Life appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Share the Ways Their Parents Screwed Them up Unintentionally

When we reach a certain age, we look back at all those times in our lives when we made a subtle shift in this direction or that, and try to figure out why it happened.

These moments can be revelatory, sobering or just plain sad. But dollars to donuts… they nearly all lead back to something a parent did.

These 12 people share their parents’ misguided approaches on Reddit and let’s just say there are some real doozies.

1. “She never went to the police…”

“They instilled in me a fear of the police and not snitching, compounded by both sets of parents making me feel like every emotion I had aside from happiness and gratefulness was disallowed and virtually banned.
So, I ended up in a lot of situations in college that I just figured, ‘Meh, I must have done something to deserve that because I’m dramatic and a bad person and friend.

When I was assaulted, I didn’t think I had a right to be upset about it and I didn’t go to the cops because I was always told the cops would just bring trouble and I was afraid of police.

I’d never been in any legal situation and didn’t know what to do and didn’t think anyone would believe me anyway.

It led to a lot of trouble last year when I started talking about it. It got back to the man who assaulted me, and his mom threatened to sue me and a lot of people called me a liar.

If I’d just gone to the police right after it happened, I would not be in this mess and I’d actually have evidence.

I remember when my mom was assaulted by her ex-husband, more than once, she never went to the police.

The one time she did call for the physical abuse, we fled to my sister’s house. The cop came and looked at the bruises on her neck and said he couldn’t do anything because she left the property and, for all he knew, she could have bruised herself.

I think that probably resonated with me too because I watched that happen and knew at that moment that we were going back and my stepdad wasn’t going to jail.

As much as it seems like a fix-all to step in in these situations, I can think of a lot of people, myself included, that have functional mental illnesses or disabilities that would probably be barred from having children if there was a blanket restriction on mentally disabled people having children.

Some kind of capability test, I feel like, would be better. My boyfriend has OCD pretty bad and I have a panic disorder and am mildly autistic. If ‘society stepped in,’ we’d probably be restricted from ever having a kid even though we’re both fully capable of loving another person and being responsible for one.

On the flip side of the coin, my mother should have never been allowed to breed.”

2. Transforming things suddenly

“When I was a kid, maybe 5 or 6, I was riding in the car with my mom. I was playing with a Transformers toy, and telling her about it.

At some point, she stopped me and said something to the effect of, ‘Son, do I talk to you about makeup or clothes or anything I’m interested in?’

I answered no. And she said, ‘Then I don’t want to hear about Transformers or whatever you’re playing with.’

In that moment, she just wanted me to shut up because she didn’t care, but over my life I’ve realized it destroyed my ability to talk about things I care about with people unless it’s someone I’m very close to, so I come off as very boring until people get to know me.”

3. “It was a 10-plus year saga of insane blow-ups and tears…”

“My mother Tiger Mom-ed the crap out of me, specifically when it came to classical music. She was a violin teacher and had me play piano, but that didn’t stop her from getting VERY INVOLVED.

What was the worst incident?

When she got so mad at how I was practicing, she threw the piano bench out the door? When she scribbled all over my music in a rage and had to buy a new book so my teacher wouldn’t see she’d lost her mind?

When she was screaming at me in the car after a lesson and just laid into the horn while driving down a busy street?

When she drove me, crying, to my friend’s house for a scheduled play date and made me ring the doorbell and explain to my friend I couldn’t stay because I hadn’t practiced enough?

It was a 10-plus year saga of insane blow-ups and tears that only stopped when I left for college and quit.

But I’m the lucky one. I was the fighter. My sister was the people-pleaser. Once my mom gave up on me, she focused the full brunt of her attention on her.

Now my sister’s got an undergrad degree in music and a whole lotta angst about whether she even likes the freaking viola or has just been forced into it her entire life.

I got quite good at piano, but I’ve barely touched it since I quit lessons.

Doubt I can play well any more. There’s just way too much baggage for me to figure out whether I actually hate piano, or I could’ve liked it but hate what my mom turned it into!

She originally planned to start me on piano and then add violin, because piano’s helpful for visualizing chords and learning music theory, or something.

I’m actually not sure why she never followed through with that plan. Maybe it was just too time consuming once my sister started lessons.

Regardless, THANK GOD.”

4. The changes in dad…

“They were a normal, happy couple at some point in my childhood, but when my dad started getting moved around, that all changed.

Things became so vitriolic toward my high school years that they could hardly be in the same room together during the day.

Any time we ventured out there was always an argument or fight. I gained my coping mechanism of listening to music in my headphones during car rides from this.

If anyone bothers me with them on I instinctively get upset now.

Another thing is that mom always wanted to fix up our house.

My dad, who was moderately wealthy, wouldn’t give her a penny to do any of the renovations, so she had to get a part time job.

Even when we got a new washer and dryer, she had to twist his arm for years. They stayed together a little while after I left home, which I did because I felt I was what was keeping their relationship together.

In that time, my dad left for another country to see his family for three months without contacting my mom.

She was furious because all of her peers their age had the kids out of the house and were going on vacations as a couple and she was just left to the wayside by my father who didn’t consider her very much anymore.

Flash forward now and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to commit to a relationship into marriage, and I’m no longer having kids.

Mom loaded me up with self image issues to boot. She also went on to get plastic surgery after getting divorced from Dad.

I don’t think I should do either of these things because I’m set up to fail. I’m waiting until my father dies and I can receive my inheritance and maybe then I can get married.

Because at least I can protect my inheritance in a prenup.”

5. “They pick on my younger brother now too and I just want to scream.”

“My younger sister and I both hit puberty pretty early. We were healthy weights and active but understandably were tired and had stretch marks.

Ya know, like bodies get when they have rapid growth spurts and hormonal changes. Our parents had the genius idea of calling us in one night and telling us we needed to lose weight – because we had stretch marks, from being growing people.

This was on top of years of ridiculous diets and fad routines, with no actual nutritional guidance.

We would also get in trouble for not knowing how to cook, after being banned from the kitchen.’

What their hearts were trying to say was ‘we don’t want you to have all of the health problems the rest of the extended family has.’

The actual result was an eating disorder I’m still fighting 16 years after that conversation. They pick on my younger brother now too and I just want to scream.

Hey, Dad, maybe put down the chips and eat a vegetable before you say anything about anybody else’s body.

The kind of parents that, while meaning well, give their kid an eating disorder are not the kind of people that react well to finding out they caused something to be wrong.

We’ve had related talks, and they did not go well. And I do have candid conversations with my brother.”

6. Parental Thieves

“They demand I pay for things (which is fine, in itself, really) except I wasn’t really allowed to have a job until right before I left for college.

Basically any gift money I got from relatives they somehow took. My mother especially has always felt entitled to anything that’s mine.

It was beautiful when I moved overseas to study and had my own bank account in the local currency. She had no say in any transaction or deposit or anything for that matter.

Disclaimer: they were never short on cash.

This was purely an ‘assert control’ thing. This was all about asserting control and reminding me that I ‘owed’ them.

I was never taught the value of hard work or saving up, I was never allowed to have a job until l was just about to leave for college because ‘school comes first and your life will be over if you don’t succeed in every way.’

It felt oddly foreign not to be asking permission to buy things.

I had a bit of an impulse buying problem initially (it truly wasn’t that bad, $30 for clothes here and there) because I had absolutely no concept of budgets or anything.

But suddenly having the freedom to make decisions on my own was very overwhelming. I had to be extra careful if I got into a tight spot financially not to ask for their support because I’d never hear the end of it.

Now it’s even worse, as I’m unemployed due to some serious health issues.

Whenever I hear, ‘You need to pay for that,’ all I can think is, With what income?

It’s really unsettling.

It’ll be anything from new clothes or whatever. Parents will first insist I need them, then drop the bomb that I’m paying.

Or, on occasion, they’ll go buy things for me (craft supplies, greeting cards, books) and then they’ll announce out of nowhere that they’ll take the money out of the shared account we have.

My parents are so weirdly inconsistent with money.

If I want to order something online or a present for a friend, they SCREAM at me for spending and to ‘save your money!!!’

But clothes, shampoo, high-end makeup? ‘You have cash.’ It makes no sense and it goes around in circles.

Believe me, I would give absolutely anything to just cut off both my raging narcissistic, heavy-drinking mother and enabling father.

However, I had to come home after living away for like 5 years. I was born with a chronic joint deformity, and had to get a massive operation to correct it, and it wasn’t feasible to do overseas where I was living (given both the local standard of care and also the cost of their medical system).

So I am back under their roof, generally on high-alert and survival mode It’s exhausting, recovering from a handful of operations and extensive rehab and just dealing with their craziness day in and day out.

I have extended family that’s prepared to swoop in and help.

Also a pretty darn swell significant other who is ready to do a rescue operation when I am well enough to function without significant help.

I’m thinking I’m going to drain the joint account, and put everything remaining there in the account in my name that she has no access to.

I feel that in adulthood, having my own money is a completely reasonable boundary.

I think I’d have to be realistic enough to expect a great deal of blow-back from her.

Whether it’s screaming or rage or some other childish nonsense, I’m going to have to take that step.

Also, I would very much like to get everything that’s reasonably mine (stocks, savings bonds, even documents such as birth certificates) in my own possession.

There is no actual reason my mother should hold onto those things.”

7. “She died within 12 hours.”

“Oh gosh, where could I start?

Well, first, she didn’t believe me about my stepdad assaulting me. But no one in my family did.

Just thought I was trying to get attention. But he was abusive to her in other ways and she just ‘took’ it, thinking she was giving us a better life because she wouldn’t be a single mom, we had a better house, etc.

So that’s number one.

When she realized he was just a piece of garbage, she finally had the guts to divorce him and he remarried some other poor soul.

She started drinking again after 14 years of sobriety. I don’t think she intentionally wanted to ruin my memories of her, but she got cancer and died shortly after, so all I remember is her last few years, which was wasted, pathetic mom.

That’s number two.

But the one that really messed me up is how on her deathbed, she refused to talk to me about any of it – her feelings, what she wanted for me in life, if she’d miss me.

Nothing. She waited until I left one night and refused life saving treatment. When I went the next day, she was comatose and we never spoke anything again.

She died within 12 hours.

Don’t ever freaking do that crap to your child. Thanks a lot, Mom.

She was also taken advantage of by a family member and grew up with a heavily drinking father, and a schizophrenic mother.

She had no good role models. She tried really hard to give us a better life and failed. I think she felt really ashamed and just didn’t know how to handle it.

If the cancer didn’t happen I wonder if she would’ve come out of it. I have tried a lot to forgive her but I’ve not been able.

Can’t even forgive myself, leading to a lot of dark thoughts.”

8. The perils of not understanding autism…

“‘If only you were nicer, they wouldn’t bully you.’

‘Your sister can make friends, so you can, too.’

‘Why do you have these weird hobbies?

No wonder you have no friends.’

‘What is it? Are you too lazy or too shy to make friends?’

I got diagnosed with autism eventually, but that was after 40 years of beating myself senseless over my inability to fit in.

The thing is though, while my mom is not the most sensitive person in the world, she is not a bad person and she thought she was helping me.

She thought she had a smart, but kind of shy, kid and she was encouraging me every single day to go out, make friends, stand up for myself.

This was the 1970s and autistic girls were not yet known to exist.

I don’t hate her for it. I always said that my mom would kill a dragon for me, but she will never understand me.

It never occurred to her that doing the social things that were normal for her took everything I had, and some things I could not do at all.

All her encouraging and assuring me that, surely, I could do it left me with a lot of self hate. Being told every day that you can make friends, and still being mostly alone and bullied within an inch of your life led me to conclude I had only myself to blame.

I don’t think I will ever get over that.

This is why it is important to diagnose autistic kids early, people!

I got mis-diagnosed. I’ve had a lifetime of dealing with episodes of severe depression, but that’s a symptom, not a cause.

Because I was an upset suicidal female, I got labeled as ‘borderline’ because that is, apparently, the standard go-to ‘hysterical female’ diagnosis.

Also I learned at a young age to hide my weirdness like my life depended on it and I got good at it, even if it came at a high price.

This label stuck to me for 20 years or so and, at one point, I was sent to a help group for borderliners, and when listening to their problems it became very clear that this was not what I had.

So, I did a few online tests and the pieces of the puzzle started to fall into place. I finally got an official test and it was a very clear cut case.

I’m generally a mild mannered person, but have a fierce hate for pro-diseasers.

They spread lies, and hate, and fear. As is now well established, there is no relation, and autistic people always existed.

I was already autistic in 1970. But many of my generation, especially women, only get diagnosed now.

The rise in numbers comes from better understanding of the condition, and it is a very good thing too.

Finally knowing I have a medical condition and I tried hard enough, way too hard in fact, helps. But 43 years of believing you are a bad person does not just go away.

I wish I had known sooner, I would have chosen a different path in life and understood my strong and weak points better.

Autism in itself does not have to be a disability but chronic depression because of constantly trying to be somebody you are not is crippling.

I’m glad I know what caused my problems, but the life time cycle of self hate is a hard one to break.

I like to think that I would have made more realistic life choices, and I would have been able to keep my job.

Right now, I’m 48 and completely tired of life, I just want it to be over with. But I’m well looked after and there is much to be grateful for, and I think I will carry on for a while.”

9. Currently in need of a therapist…

“My emotionally challenged mother brought me into the world though an anonymous donor. Then, she married a heavy-drinking narcissist who didn’t even appreciate his own kids when I was 10.

Most of us still live at home and/or have no future and have addiction problems, along with psychological issues.

Both of them have gone bankrupt at least once and when my mother finally got approved for disability, she let my stepdad blow it all just like every ‘large’ amount of money they ever came into.

She never says no to him, even if he’s being unkind and unfair to any of us or to her. They both are very out of touch with themselves and don’t like to talk about feelings… at all.

One of the worst parts is that out of the 6 of us, I (26) am the only one stuck here with the both of them.

His three children (23-26) still live with their own mom, my older brother (30) lives with his addict girlfriend, and my younger sister (21) is the only one going to college as a full time student.

This is currently something that has really been bothering me lately.

I’m looking for a therapist but it’s hard to find one that I resonate with in my area.”

10. The Guilt Gun

“My dad basically never interacted with me except to make dad jokes. My mom used me to vent about her problems because my dad didn’t know how to discuss emotional topics.

She also engaged me in long, boring, one-sided conversations that I couldn’t get out of without making her upset and often ask me to go out and do things with her which, again, I couldn’t refuse without making her upset.

Guilt is her go-to weapon of choice.

The thing is though, her venting wasn’t even very common compared to just…

talking. About whatever book she’s reading, or something she saw on the news, or something happening with her friend, etc.

And she did have friends she could talk and hang out with as well. I don’t why she forced me into it so much.

I’d see how long I could be quiet before she required my input and it was pretty much endless.

That pretty much became my default state, because anything I said would just trigger more words from her.

It hasn’t been great for my conversation skills in general. They also praised me for being smart rather than for working hard, which crippled my work ethic.

I hear that’s a pretty common one.

Could she be a narcissist? Yeah, that sounds likely. For some reason, I was under the impression that genuine narcissism was somewhat common.

She did have a fairly messed up childhood with an abusive mother.

All this when I was already constantly exhausted from school and depression, and extremely introverted.

So, now I associate relationships of any kind with exhausting obligation. It’s a big part of why I’ve always had difficulty developing a social life.

I know this all came from a place of love, which is why I feel bad complaining about it, but it really damaged me.

Incidentally, I’m terrified of having kids because it seems like the slightest mistake on my part can mess them up for life.”

11. Stranger in a strange land…

“I was sent to a Muslim school in a Muslim country with my brother at 12 years old, the moment I graduated sixth grade.

Dad thought he was securing a place for us in Heaven, but I have a feeling he only secured his own place down below for that sheer neglect.

Big bro had spent a great deal of time there prior and had a decent support structure.

He had already made friends from before. Wasn’t the case for me because Bro was the jerk type of sibling who never included me in anything.

The few friends I made, apparently in the same boat as me, didn’t last as long and went back to their respective countries.

The longest friendships I had from seventh to ninth grade lasted a month.

Aside from changing to an introvert caused by the culture shock and the hostility toward Americans, it also made me a middle school dropout.

Spent the first year alone without parents, the two years after that without friends, and I just spent the majority of my time exploring the city in silence.

As a result, my voice didn’t fully develop, and my communication skills suffered a great deal. My confidence went out the window.

Sometimes I wonder if my symptoms are a result of that trauma.

The 4th year, after so much trash talk from my mom, Dad finally agreed to put me in a private school taught in English.

Started as a freshman at a sophomores age. But by then, I could barely function socially. I still had my jokes and crazy sense of humor, but no confidence behind them.

I hit a lucky break, with an extreme extrovert who was the most popular guy in that small school. The extrovert adopted me, the introvert of all people.”

Long story short… if your parents were awesome to you when you were growing up… LET THEM KNOW!

Because you see how others have turned out.

Yeah, not good.

The post People Share the Ways Their Parents Screwed Them up Unintentionally appeared first on UberFacts.

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15+ People Reveal the Most Disrespectful Things People Did in Their Homes

It’s pretty unbelievable that some people don’t have any clue how to behave in someone else’s house.

These people definitely don’t…and the results are hilarious.

Enjoy!

1. Very Bed Manners

“She invited a bunch of sleazy guys over, despite me asking her not to. She let them in while I was in the shower, so I did not realize they were in my house.

She then took one into my housemate’s bedroom and locked the door (super disrespectful to my housemate who had so kindly offered that she could stay in her room as she was going to be at her boyfriend’s for the weekend).

When I got out of the shower, one of the guys was in my bed!

And I was like dude, get the heck out of my bedroom. And he refused and said my friend said he could stay there.

I was very not ok with that. I physically had to push him out of my house. The next day when she sobered up, I kicked her out of my house and did not speak to her for three years.”

2. Mirror Image

“It was my mother-in-law who came to visit my then boyfriend and I. We were in a rental that had a weird little bathroom that the rest of the house made up for.

But I got up in the morning and went to the gym and grabbed some food to make dinner. When I got home, I went to shower and she has taken down the bathroom mirror (which came with the rental!) and put up a new one that was really ugly and too small.

I wrapped myself in a towel and switched it back. She asked me why I did that and I told her it wasn’t my mirror and gave her the other one back.”

3. A Horrible Husband

“My ex husband and I had a couple that we were friends with. I grew up in the same neighborhood with the husband, and worked at a bar with the wife.

They had met and gotten married in Vegas 3 weeks later, so naturally there was a lot of buzz about their relationship, and her intentions (the guy was super sweet, and she was, well, sketchy).

We had them over for dinner and karaoke, and the night was fun.

She kept taking selfies on our disposable camera with my husband, and wanting to sing duets with him, but whatever.

Her husband and I finally tapped out around 2 am, and they stayed up. I woke up the next morning, and there was drink stains ALL OVER my bar room.

Clothes everywhere, half butted cigs, lip prints on my big mirror. She had slept with my husband while her husband and I were sleeping.

I don’t think the poor guy even realized what happened, I never even really had a fallout with her.

She quit the bar and I never saw her again. They did get divorced, but I don’t know if that’s why.

As far as my husband and I, I was young, and naive.

It took me a little while to realize my worth, but when I did, I went out with a bang. Sent him a pic of his belongings outside our condo and never looked back.”

4. The Piggy Bank

“My wife’s cousin was staying at our house because he was going through marital problems.

One night I woke up in the middle of the night and I heard some change rattling. He walks down the hall with my 5 year old’s piggy bank.

He was taking money from my daughter’s freaking piggy bank to buy drinks and smokes.

I was speechless. Like, ‘How could you?’ He claimed he was too embarrassed to ask me or my wife for money. So he resorted to stealing it.

If I would not have woken up that night, we would have never known. A day or so later, he got some money from somewhere and put $200 in her piggy bank. He was only sorry because he got caught. He left shortly after that incident.

Still bothers me to this day.”

5. Nope. Period.

“My college roommate invited a bunch of people over one night. We each had our own bathroom, clearly marked.

I go to get something from my room and hear obvious banging going on in my bathroom. I knock on the door and say, ‘Wrong one, get the heck out.’

After they came out, I saw that they had cleaned themselves up on my nice white towels.

Apparently, she was on her period.”

6. Something’s Fishy

“Back in college, my roommates and I hosted a birthday party for a mutual friend at our apartment. Earlier that day we gifted her a pet goldfish because she had been talking about getting a fish.

Fast forward to later in the night.

Our male friend, let’s call him Mike, decided he needed to find a way to impress our other friend, who I’ll call Darla.

Mike tries every lame joke and pick up line on Darla and fails time and time again. Then he sees the goldfish in his tank and scoops him up in his hand.

He says, ‘Check this out, Darla!’ He then plops the fish into his mouth and swallows it alive. My roommate and I immediately rush over and start trying to make Mike puke the fish back up.

Darla quickly makes for the door and leaves the party.

Sadly, that fish met its doom in Mike’s stomach that night.

He never apologized although he did complain about severe stomach issues for several days afterwards.”

7. Caught Red Handed

“When I was in cub scouts in third grade, my mom hosted a meeting for the scouts in my grade at school where we built bird houses for some badge or something.

While we were waiting for everyone to arrive, me and the scouts who had already arrived started playing in my backyard.

One scout, let’s call him ‘N,’ told us he had to go to the bathroom ‘really bad’ and left. When everyone arrives to start the project, I notice that N was sitting at the edge of the table looking down and my mom was REALLY angry, and was trying her best to suppress it.

She asked me and all the other scouts if I had given N permission to go in my room. Me and all my friends said, ‘No, he said he had to go to the bathroom really bad.’

This response only made my mom even more visibly angry and N ducked his head more. 5 minutes later N’s mom arrives and is apologizing profusely to my mom.

Turns out N went into my room, pocketed the 20 dollars I had been saving up (I got paid 2 dollars a week for mowing the lawn as an allowance), and was stuffing my toys and video games into his backpack.

My mom went upstairs to ACTUALLY use the bathroom and noticed the theft taking place and caught him red-handed.

He then lied to my mom and said I gave him permission to go into my room and he was just ‘checking it out.’

But no, my mom caught him red handed and my mom is SCARY when she’s mad. In total, he tried to steal around $150 in Game Boy cartridges, Pokemon cards and toys and around 3 months of allowance.”

8. With Family Like This…

“I was hit by a car when bicycling to work one day. I ruptured a kidney, broke my jaw and six teeth, and was in general pretty banged up.

My boyfriend at the time was overwhelmed by it and he called my family for support (without me knowing, otherwise I would have told him not to).

I hadn’t spoken to them in about five years at this point.

They drove 10 hours to our apartment. My boyfriend and I had arranged a suite of rooms at the beautiful hotel literally around the corner from us but they said it would be better if the FIVE of them slept in our one bedroom apartment with us.

Fine.

I’m pretty out of it from medication, etc. They had never been to my city before so they insisted I show them around.

I got them behind the scenes passes to tour Pixar studios and tried to show them around as much as possible despite the fact I could barely move or walk from the pain in my kidney.

After a few days, I told them I couldn’t keep going places with them.

They said I was ruining their vacation. I responded that I didn’t know it was a vacation, I thought they came to visit me because they were concerned about my near-death accident.

My mother laughed at that. I told them all to get the heck out of my apartment. On the way out, my sister stole all my pain meds.

I didn’t realize it until several hours later when they were long gone and I couldn’t find them to take my next dose.

I had to go back to the ER and the staff didn’t want to give me more meds because they thought I was doing something illegal.

I had to recover from serious injuries without help.”

9. Stay Away From That Kid

“When I was a kid, my mom had a friend and her son over. They were over for a couple hours and just as they were leaving I noticed all of my video games were gone, I told my mom, she goes and grabs his backpack and off course they were all in his bag.

His mother immediately came to his defense, saying he’s got a lot of games and must have thought they were his.

It didn’t even make sense and she acted as if nothing had happened.

Anyway, terrible mother, kid had no chance.

He is now in jail for life no parole for shooting and killing a cop during a coke bust.

There were about 10 or 11 years between the time this happened and the time he went to jail.

I was around 7 or 8 and he was around 9 or 10.

Our parents stopped being friends, but they still hung around the same social groups.

He got expelled multiple times until he was expelled from the district. In middle school he got mad at someone and brought a peashooter to school and shot him in the butt.

Then a couple years later he made a pipe bomb and stuck it in a locker. He was arrested multiple times for vandalism.

His mother was always the type of person that would defend him at any cost.”

10. Immature Friend

“Buddy from college was traveling through town and stayed with my wife and I for the weekend. Nothing crazy, hung out and remembered our college years.

A few days after he left, my guest bathroom reeked. Took a bit to figure out but finally discovered an upper decker (poop in the sink) left for us.

Disgusting.

He thought he was being funny. Our group in college would pull pranks on each other all the time (not this bad).

The problem is everyone else matured, he did not. Our paths haven’t crossed since he stayed with us, only a few comments in group chats.

He hasn’t apologized, told me to ‘chill, it was just a joke’… honestly, I’m done.”

11. Yeah, Ya Dumb

“My new neighbor moved into his house on the same day as my youngest daughter’s first birthday party.

He had a young kid (around 6 or 7) close to the age of my nieces, so I invited him and his family over.

After they’re in the house for around 10 minutes, I notice he’s no longer there, but his daughter is still eating pizza at my table.

I looked all over the house and couldn’t find him. I walked down to his house and knocked on the doors.

Nobody answered and his car was gone.

Nearly 4 hours later, the last of the guests had left, it was around 9:30 pm and he still was nowhere to be found.

He finally came back at 10 pm (walked right in without knocking) and acted like nothing was wrong. I pulled him outside and told him that it is not okay to leave a small child with complete strangers, certainly not for that long, and not without letting someone know.

His excuse? We seemed like decent people and he needed to pick up a few more boxes from their old house.

I actually have quite a few stories about this guy and he’s only been on my street for 7 months.

1) I had finished cutting the grass and went upstairs to take a shower. After getting dressed, I heard a noise downstairs.

I was home alone, my wife wouldn’t be done work for an hour or so, and my kids were at their grandparents.

So, I go to investigate and find the neighbor’s daughter in my rec room, playing with my children’s toys.

I asked what she was doing and she said she wanted to come over to play. I told her the kids weren’t here, she shouldn’t be here, and needs to go home right away.

I actually had to physically pick her up and carry her to her house, because she didn’t want to leave.

I told her father what was going on and he said, ‘Oh, yeah, I figured she went over there.’

That was it. No apology, no explanation, no talking to his child. I told him that from now on, unless he or his wife is physically present, she will not be permitted in my house.

I’m not interested in being accused of anything.

2) A few weeks before Christmas, I threw my back out and had to take some pretty heavy painkillers.

I was home alone, had just put some food in the oven, and he rang my doorbell. I hobbled over, opened the door and asked what was up.

‘I heard from [neighbor between us] that you hurt your back and wanted to check on you.’

‘Thanks, bud, I appreciate that.

I’m alright, just getting ready to eat some lunch, then take a nap. Why don’t you swing by later and play some games or something.’

I’m trying to be a good neighbor.

He tells me that he doesn’t have a lot of time, but figured he’d stay and chat for a bit.

‘Sorry, but I can’t really chat right now. My back is pretty bad, I’m due for my meds, and I really have to get back inside.’

He then tries to chat about whatever the heck was on his mind after I told him two more times that I’m in a lot of pain.

I finally just closed the door while he was still talking.

3) They had a baby a few months ago and my wife figured she’d offer to babysit for a few hours to let them get out of the house and relax.

She knocks on their door and this dude answers in his boxers and slippers. He’s not exactly the kind of guy you’d enjoy seeing in his boxers and slippers.

He invited my wife in and asked if she wanted anything. She’s like, ‘Uh, actually, I can’t stay. I was running to the grocery store and wanted to see if you were low on any baby supplies.’

4) My doorbell rang last Wednesday.

I open the door within 30 seconds of it ringing to find him sitting on my lawn. Not in the steps, not on the chairs on the porch, just in the grass facing away from the house.

He just wanted to come by and hang out for a bit until his wife and kids came home.

Side note: The shame of it is that he’s actually super nice, just incredibly stupid and awkward. I’m about 95% sure their daughter is on the spectrum, but I don’t think the parents notice because of how stupid the father is.”

12. What The What?!

“One night the girls who lived in the apartment across the hall brought a friend with them to hang with us.

As soon as she walked in, she screamed, ‘This will be hilarious. College guys always get the crappy, hand me down dishes from their parents!’

She walked into the kitchen and began pulling out pans and dishes and howling about how old and ratty they were.

Our friends were mortified.

When they tried to talk to her, she talked louder. After 30 seconds of this lunacy, my roommate and I told her to leave.

She threw a giant fit and called us jerks.

When we honestly tried to come up with some justification for her after the fact, the best that we could come up with was that maybe she was being (way, way) too familiar.

I can see a close friend opening my cabinet and saying good-naturedly, ‘Man, college kids are an excuse for parents to dump their old stuff and buy new.’

If that was her intent, she failed.”

13. Well, Shit!

“We had friends over for my girlfriend’s birthday and to celebrate moving into a new apartment together for the first time.

A guy we knew from college kept stealing people’s drinks throughout the night and got incoherently wasted.

He lived a couple hours away but was too wasted to go home, so we let him stay despite already having a friend from out of town who planned to stay with us.

In the middle of the night, the wasted dude stripped down, forced the other guest off the only air mattress and pooped himself massively.

He then tracked poopy footprints all over the apartment, smacked poopy handprints on all the door knobs, including in the bedroom where we were sleeping, covered all our towels/some blankets in his butt sauce, and peed in some places.

Oh but it’s not like he didn’t make it to the bathroom – he left a second, possibly third dump in the toilet.

No flush. No apology. Just left at like 6 am, without his poopy underpants. Those he left on the ruined air mattress in a steaming heap.

Needless to say, the surprise breakfast waffles for my girlfriend were not as enjoyable.”

14. In The Army Now

“When my husband was in the army, we invited a bunch of single soldiers to have Thanksgiving dinner at our house rather than let them languish in the barracks.

One of them was a childish private. He began the night by plopping down on the sofa to play with his Gameboy and announced that he hated turkey.

Ignored everyone else for the next hour.

Alright. No problem. I made a massive dinner and there’s plenty of other things to eat.

When it came time to serve up the buffet, people lined up and were heaping their plates and this jerk kept loudly complaining that there was nothing good.

Selected a few items and joined everyone at the table. Took one bite of one thing, visibly gagged and threw down his fork.

Announced that all this food was ‘dirt’ and left the table. Went back to the sofa with his Gameboy. I think that everyone was in such shock that nobody knew how to react.

This was so far outside of the norm that there’s no way to prepare for such a thing. Nobody wanted to ruin the evening by making a scene, so everyone focused on making me feel better.

(Lots of quick hugs and pats on the shoulder with words of encouragement.) Maybe they were waiting for my husband to do something and he was loading up at the buffet and talking at the time so he missed it.

Everyone blew it off and ignored him for awhile.

We enjoyed our meal and people went out of their way to tell me how lovely the food was and to thank me for inviting them.

People began to break up and get drinks. Music was turned up and we settled in for a nice evening.

About an hour after dinner, the stinker began to complain that he was hungry.

That there wasn’t anything to eat. He would NOT shut up. Demanded that somebody order pizza. At one point he asked for a peanut butter sandwich.

People were ‘hushing’ him, but he got worse, so I tried to placate him. I made him one and he was mad because it was whole wheat bread and he only liked white.

After he rejected the sandwich, I didn’t know what the heck to do.

I stood there holding the darn thing and I was pretty close to throwing it at him. Three soldiers abruptly excused themselves, pulled him off the couch, and marched him outside.

The soldiers came back in about fifteen minutes later, picked up their drinks, and continued the conversation like nothing ever happened.

I never saw him again. And I mean ever. He must’ve been banned from every social function from then on out because it’s like he never existed.”

15. Turn The Fucking Xbox Off!

“Years ago, my then boyfriend (now ex) came over to my house unexpectedly the day of my mom’s birthday.

My siblings and I were busy decorating. He made himself comfortable on the couch and played on the Xbox, he was out of the way so I ignored him.

Just before she gets home, I make him turn off the console. Mom gets home and we do the whole ‘Surprise!’ bit. Ex immediately (like, my mom hadn’t even gotten past the entryway) grabbed the controller, turned the Xbox on, slapped my butt and told me to ‘get him a drink’ as he sat back down on the couch.

I snatched the controller out of his hands and told him to go home.

I was already looking for a reason to break up with him.

I’d recently realized that his ‘quirks’ were actually unpredictable things he did because he had a drinking problem.

We only saw each other about twice a week so I hadn’t been up close and personal with the weird stuff he did after drinking and apparently he’d had a few before coming over.

At this point, it’s important to add that his license was revoked so he got around on a motorized Razor scooter.

But I had gotten really close to his friend group and didn’t want to lose them. I didn’t talk to him for a couple of days, had a chance meeting with my now husband, and dumped the ex via a ‘we should see other people’ text.”

16. A Pair Of Dolts

“My husband’s friend and her boyfriend arrived from overseas. We hadn’t met him previously.

On day one, the boyfriend googled ‘buy weed in (city name),’ got scammed into sending a lot of cash to Nigeria via Western Union to pay for it, then gave them our address for delivery.

No weed ever turned up, but the police did.

On day two, he wanked in the shower and his load got caught by the hair catcher in the drain, which I discovered when I cleaned the shower.

Nearly vomited.

On day three, the pair of them had a massive raging argument at our dinner table while the four of us were sitting down to eat.

They were yelling insults at each other and trying to get us to join in and take a side.

It went on like this for about a week until my husband told them to leave.

They tried to come back a few days later because they’d discovered that our country is expensive and they’d prefer free accommodation with us.

We declined.”

17. Disney Dummy

“I prepared a Disney-themed surprise party for a good friend of mine in my apartment. Every corner had a different Disney theme.

I made almost all the decorations by hand and the result was truly amazing. I spent around 3 days decorating my whole apartment and preparing her favorite foods.

It wasn’t supposed to be a party with a lot of people but I invited our close friends and asked them to come without having dinner first.

Some vegetarian friends who were coming mentioned that they were bringing a friend of theirs who was vegan so I made a big buffet including the birthday girl’s favorite foods, a few vegan dishes, a big pitcher of fresh mocktails to share, everyone’s favorite snacks including a few vegan snacks on the side…

Think the big picture, a baked Brie, nice homemade hummus, cut-up fresh veggies, vegan dips made with veganaise, vegan macaroni salad, nachos, French bread, hot spinach dip, bacon poppers, a spinach Asian salad, a huge pecan cake Frozen-themed, vegan marshmallows dipped in vegan chocolate, popcorn caramel cake pops…

That didn’t even include the snacks I bought since these were all homemade.

Anyway, my friends get to my place and they are late, but it’s not a big deal.

The birthday girl is truly surprised. It looks magical and the food looks amazing. I invite people to start digging in right away…

and no one grabs a plate except me and my boyfriend. Turns out they went out to dinner right before coming here when I specifically asked them not to.

I mention that I made a lot of vegan dishes since I knew their vegan friend that I never even met was coming…

yet she doesn’t thank me or attempt to eat anything. She says, ‘Nah, I’m good I ate before coming here!’

The birthday girl eventually gets some stuff but mostly the snacks I bought. I tried to camouflage my tears by inviting people to play games.

We played for an hour and a half until my friend said she was tired and wanted to go home. Other people just followed behind her.

3 days of decorating and cooking.

Around $100 worth of food and snacks. All of this for maximum two hours. When they left, I cried so hard and my boyfriend was livid.

He couldn’t believe how ungrateful my friends were. I used to be very generous to my friends but ever since that happened, I’ve stopped making parties, dinners and gifts.

It really broke my heart and my view on our friendships has never been the same since then.”

Sooo… which one was the rudest?

Share this post and let your friends know!

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15 People Remember the Conversations They’ve Had with Famous People

Have you ever had a real conversation with a celebrity? I’m talking about a talk that, while brief, wasn’t just you bumping into them randomly on the street? Or just posing with them for a photo?

AskReddit users shared their celebrity stories and some of them might even make you jealous.

Do you have your own celebrity encounter story? Share it in the comments!

1. Dave Chappelle

“Dave Chappelle. I was working Night Audit(overnight) at a Mid Luxury hotel in Napa. He and 6-7 friends rode up on motorcycles at like 2am and asked to get rooms for 2 nights. Apparently, they were in a road trip to nowhere and would just stop each night where they stopped. They had a few people following them in a truck and trailer.

He is a pretty legit insomniac and would sit in the front steps for 5-6 hours each night on his phone smoking. They decided to extend and ended up staying a total of 6 nights. On night 2, I went out and asked for a light and we ended up chatting a few hours. It repeated for 3 nights and I got to hang out with him about 10 hours total. Smart, thoughtful, articulate, and genuine person. The humor is just him. I was actually blown away with how precise his natural whit and timing was.

Saw him at a show in SF last year and he recognized me. Shouted out from stage “Yo… I know you… You still working nights?”

Great human.”

2. Buzz

“Buzz Aldrin. Just my family and I got to spend a few days with him touring around the Kennedy Space Center. I was 12 and had no idea what kinds of questions to ask him. So all I could think of was “Were you scared during launch?” and, “What does Moon ground feel like?”

I got back in contact with him l a few years back when I called to notify him that my Dad had passed away. He said that he remembered my father and was proud that I followed in his footsteps by majoring in Aerospace Engineering for my Bachelor’s.”

3. Two comedy legends

“Jim Carrey and Robin Williams. They visited the St Jude Children’s Hospital in Memphis TN. They both were incredibly nice and hilarious. This small kid fell into the floor and was crying and kicking his legs so Jim Carrey (in a very expensive suit) dropped to the floor and did the same just to stop him from crying. Robin Williams wore the nose from Patch Adams and much more hairy than he looked in the movies.”

4. Crocodile Hunter

“Steve Irwin in an elevator when I was 11. He asked me where I was from and if there was any crocodiles in the pool and I told him I went to his zoo and how cool it was. He was exactly how you think he’d be, just a really nice guy and a great dude.”

5. Ripley!

“Sigourney Weaver, just after Aliens was released on VHS. A buddy of mine and I were riding up the gondola at the mountain where we were on the ski team, she was in the singles line, and we didn’t know who she was until the end of the ride up (~10 mins), when she said something, and he and I (both being about 12, so we had both obviously seen Aliens, as good children of the 80’s) were both like… “Ripley?”

She was kind enough to repeat “get away from her, you bitch!” for us.”

6. A nice guy

“Jason Mamoa. Bumped into him when I went rock climbing with my girlfriends. He liked my Batman shirt hahaha.”

7. Dolly

“Dolly Parton. My grandpa is good friends with her. She’s a peach.”

8. That is amazing

“Played a round of golf with Bill Murray, was awesome.”

9. Swayze

“Patrick Swayze! Dude was super nice!

I used to work at a small airport in Van Nuys, CA. Mr. Swayze and his wife owned an older King Air that they flew themselves. My very first day on the job, while I was standing on a ladder fueling his plane, Mr. Swayze was inspecting his plane before a flight. He found a small puddle of fluid (left behind by a previous aircraft) on the ground under one of his engines and dipped his middle finger in it, held it up to me and asked, “Hey what the fuck is this?”

He clarified that he was just joking when he saw me internally freaking out. He usually tipped really really well whenever I helped with his bags and pulled his truck around (especially when his goldendoodle clawed me in the face once) and I remember his wife coming to an older, unused hangar once to pull a litter of kittens out from under a car to take them to the vet.

This was all before he got his cancer diagnosis, and I left the job before he died. I do remember being legitimately sad for his wife when I read he had passed. The guy didn’t really take too much time to know me, but he was always very friendly, very polite, and made it a point to treat us like people. I met a handful of famous (and not famous, but connected and wealthy) people while I worked there – but he was the one I’ll always remember. Dude was awesome.”

10. The Boss

“Bruce Springsteen stayed at the hotel I used to work at in college and I got to carry the band’s guitars from the hotel to the stage which was cool( he was playing before a speech from President Obama).

When I was grabbing them from his room his wife was nagging him about his hair and he just laughed and came out in the hallway with me and chatted for a minute or so. Asked me if I was married(I wasn’t) and told me to expect the nagging if I were to get married.”

11. This is great

“Samuel L. Jackson. Even got to end the conversation on him calling me a motherfucker. I put that shit on my resume.

Was in an IHOP at like 2 am. Went to check out and the cashier was all smiles and anxiously said, “There’s a celebrity behind you.” Rolled my eyes and figured it was gonna be someone like Jimmy Fallon or Joe Rogan. Turn around and there in all his glory is Samuel L. Jackson. In a pink plaid golf outfit. Hat and all. His friend was in the same but it was baby blue. I was legit star struck, mouth agape.

SLJ proceeds to channel some Jules Winfield on me and my friend, “DAAAAAAAAAAAAMN. You two acting like I held you up at gunpoint or some shit. Tell me, do I……… intimidate you? ”

Without missing a beat, and the only time I’ll ever think of anything remotely this witty, I tell him, “We’re not intimidated by anyone that can get their ass kicked by Eddie Murphy and Arsenio Hall with a mop handle.”

SLJ is caught flat footed for a split second and starts laughing his ass off. We get to chill with him for a bit and chat him up. When he says he’s gotta bounce, I ask for a favor. “Now, I don’t do autographs,” he starts. “Ain’t no one gonna believe me with some napkin or something anyways. Could you call me a motherfucker? ”

He laughs uproariously and stone faces us mid laugh, “you’re a motherfucker.”

I’m a six foot three dude and I melted on the spot, shivers running up my spine.”

12. Spike

“I once shot a movie with Spike Lee. Very low budget, independent thing with a tiny crew and tinier cast. We were together everyday for a week but he never said a word to me beyond some notes. Anyway, on the last day of filming we were coming back from lunch and I was standing outside having a cigarette when he comes walking by.

He says something like “Ahh, so this is where the smokers all hang, huh?” and I just kind of laugh and say Yeah. He looks at my beat up sneakers and goes “What kind of shoes are those?” I tell him I don’t actually know, and he looks at me like I just took a dump on the sidewalk and says “You don’t know?” and I tell him I’d run a 5k three years earlier and had needed some running shoes, so I bought the cheapest ones.

This dude reaches into the cargo pocket of his pants and pulls out a fat envelope. He opens the envelope and I see that it’s full of Nike gift cards. Like, a hundred Nike gift cards. He pulls out two, hands them to me, and says “There’s two gift cards, $75 a piece. Get yourself some new Jordans” and walks away.”

13. Full Metal Jacket!

“R. Lee Ermey, The Gunny. Just an all-around down to earth badass dude. Met him at WWII Weekend here in PA years ago, along with my younger brother who got inspired to become an US Marine. It was a honor to meet him.”

14. Tom Hanks

“Tom Hanks. He was the host for the national christmas tree lighting, and I volunteer with the decorations every year. He was looking at some and talking to his wife about them. As I was facing away at first I just kept thinking that sounds like woody from Toy Story.

I turn around and low and behold it was. The nicest couple you could imagine, just pleasent conversation for a few minutes and they were called off to do something. Both pleased and disappointed I didn’t ask for a selfie, but I was geeking out nonetheless.”

15. Rock star

“Steven Tyler came into my car dealership. One of the managers came up to me and said, “I need you to help a VERY special client.” I joking asked who and said, “it isn’t another footballer player, is it?”

He didn’t think it was funny. Walk to where Steven was and my jaw dropped. Hard to maintain professionalism when you have music royalty in front of you. After he had left, one of my coworkers came up to me and said, “whoa! That was the dude from American idol!” I wanted to slap him.”

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Military Drill Sergeants Share the Funniest Things They’ve Seen Recruits Do

New recruits in the military really don’t know what they have coming, and these drill sergeants didn’t know what they were in for either.

Enjoy this look into the weird, wild, wonderfully crazy world of boot camp!

1. Vomit comet!

I was in the Navy, and we were undergoing inspection by the Division Officer.

He rolled in for inspection, walked up to the first dude, and the dude puked. However, this guy was a genius—he puked down his t-shirt and into his dress blues, saving the District Officer from getting puked on.

The Division Officer was so impressed at the dude’s “military bearing” that he called the inspection right then and there. 5.0 sailors, all around; the highest grade.

2. What’s good for the goose…

I had one recruit who was paying attention to a bunch of geese rather than his drill sergeants.

I was dying of laughter on the inside, but I made him get up and chase them all away.

As they flew in the air, we made him follow them for several hundred feet to make sure they wouldn’t come back!

3. Upsturs Downsturs

Standing in formation at Fort Knox, we were about to head to the range and everyone needed their gloves. One private came out without them and the drill sergeant screamed, “Private, where are your gloves?”

In a thick Tennessee accent, he replied, “Well dang, drill sergeant, I must have done left them upsturs.”

The drill sergeant, from New Jersey, just died laughing.

4. Full Moon

An RDC in another division asked a guy if he shaved that morning and the guy claimed he had.

The RDC said, “Recruit, you are either a werewolf or you are lying, so which is it?”

The guy responded, “I must be a werewolf, petty officer!”

5. “I’M STILL HERE!”

I was going through Air Force basic training. When on guard duty, if an unauthorized person wanted to be let into the bunks, you had to report it to your drill sergeant. Our sister flight’s drill sergeant came up while I was on guard and requested entry so I reported to my sergeant and he had me ask another a series of questions.

This particular sergeant had a bushy mustache, so one question I had to ask was, “In what year was Magnum PI canceled?” He dropped out of view from the window laughing, came back up and yelled: “It was never canceled because I’M STILL HERE!”

It took everything I had not to crack up. The military can be hilarious sometimes.

6. Oh crackers!

We weren’t allowed to talk during chow at the galley. You had to point at what you wanted another recruit to pass, and they had to silently pass it.

One recruit wanted a napkin and pointed. The other recruit asked, “This?”

The coast guard drill sergeant immediately came over, circling him like sharks, screaming at him. They made him put like, 10 saltines in his mouth and chew until his mouth was full, then ask the first recruit if he wanted a napkin again. He barely could get it out, spitting pieces of cracker everywhere.

Then they screamed at the first recruit to answer him, but we were all silently cracking up.

It was the best.

7. “Die, smile die!”

While in basic training, we had a female that loved to smile. She was just a happy person in general.

Well, my training instructor came in, and she caught the female trainee smiling. She walked up to the female trainee and yelled, “Wipe that smile off your face!” The female trainee stopped smiling. The training instructor continued to yell, “No! Literally wipe the smile off your face with your hand!”

The trainee did so. “Now throw it on the ground!” The trainee followed orders. “Now stomp on it and scream, ‘Die, smile die!’ As loud as you can!” The female trainee stood there for a second before following through.

Her tiny little voice cracked as she yelled: “Die, smile die!” It took everything I had not to bust out laughing.

8. He’s got a point…

In my basic training class, I was a squad leader, which is essentially just a person who does extra chores. Anyway, for reasons unknown, I and the other squad leaders were doing pushups in the drill sergeant’s office. Now, when you do these pushups, you eventually reach muscle failure so you just sort of hang out there in the front leaning for rest and trying to bust out another pushup every few seconds or so.

We were all in there dying and the drill sergeant said to one of my buddies: “Private Hudson! Tell me what’s the difference between basic training and being in prison.”

Without missing a beat, Private Hudson said: “Drill Sergeant! In prison, they get to watch TV!” The drill sergeant cracked a little bit of a smile and then told us to get up and get out of there.

9. Pocket full of tears…

I work at basic training ranges and we had a drill sergeant yell at his soldier while they were getting ready to go down a buddy live fire exercise. The soldier froze and started crying. This 18-year-old kid was just in tears for getting yelled at.

The drill sergeant yelled at him some more and he finally gave up because the kid wouldn’t stop crying. He made him scoop tears off his face and put them in his pockets till he filled his pockets up with tears. He did this for like an hour.

It was hilarious.

10. Sleepy time

When I was in basic training, I saw three drill sergeants surrounding a private who was laying down.

They were all screaming, “GO TO SLEEP RIGHT NOW PRIVATE, YOU TAKE A NAP THIS VERY SECOND YOU POOR TIRED SOUL!” (Not exact words, but you get the gist of it).

I still wonder how he got himself into that predicament.

11. A weird game of telephone…

On hikes, my DI’s loved having conversations using the recruits as messengers.

The DI at the end of the formation would send a recruit to the front to give the DI up there a message and back.

They would either have stupid conversations or talk trash using the recruit.

12. Pinecone probs

During Field Training Exercise, the DS told me to get a trash bag, then go around and collect as many pine cones as I could.

For like three hours. I had a bunch of trash bags.

He then took a little walk around, contemplated for a bit, then said that he was mistaken.

He ordered me to redistribute all the pinecones.

13. On further reflection…

When I was in boot camp, our drill instructor had a recruit sit in front of his own reflection and continually ask himself if he really wanted to be there… for three hours.

All while screaming at him to “mean it!”

I don’t know how they didn’t crack up. It was hilarious.

14. Spittle

“WHAT’S THAT DISGUSTING STUFF ALL OVER YOUR GLASSES, MAGGOT?!”

“I believe it’s your saliva, drill sergeant, sir!”

He closed his eyes and waited for death.

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These Things Have No Reason to Exist, and yet Somehow They Do

I’m talking about those little annoying things you run into on a daily basis and think, “Why, in this day and age, am I still dealing with this sh*t?”

Below are 15 perfect examples of stuff we just shouldn’t have to face anymore.

#15. Whyyyyy!!

“For Christmas my dad got me a bluetooth frisbee that’s supposed to connect to your phone and play music. It doesn’t make any sense to me why this thing seemed like a good idea to make. Its heavy, it sounds like crap, you’re supposed to throw this speaker that supposedly playing music you like away from you when you get it + it’s limited on how far you can throw it because it’s connected to your phone. Also it’s hard to carry because it’s so big so it wouldn’t even be fun to bring anywhere even if you need a bluetooth speaker. Whyyy!!

*edits *Thank you kind stranger for the silver *edited first sentence for clarity (it plays whatever you tell it to not just Christmas music) *For those who asked for a link, here it is they must have known it was terrible because it’s marketed as a flying sound disc instead of a frisbee. *RIP my inbox TIL frisbee is a trademark of Wham-O?”

#14. False advertising.

“Fake Youtube Pranks and Youtube Video Clickbait

These videos are monetized so the creators are making $$$ off of False Advertising.”

#13. Brains, man.

“Depression.

My brain: “hate yourself”

Me: “but why?”

My brain: “just do it.”

Edit: oh wow my first silver. Cool!

Edit 2: now I’ve got 1 of everything! Can’t wait to pass these onto others! Thank you!”

#12. Nope.

“sushi at gas stations.”

#11. Koala rant incoming

“Koalas.

Here’s the copypasta:

Koalas are fucking horrible animals. They have one of the smallest brain to body ratios of any mammal, additionally – their brains are smooth. A brain is folded to increase the surface area for neurons. If you present a koala with leaves plucked from a branch, laid on a flat surface, the koala will not recognise it as food. They are too thick to adapt their feeding behaviour to cope with change. In a room full of potential food, they can literally starve to death. This is not the token of an animal that is winning at life.

Speaking of stupidity and food, one of the likely reasons for their primitive brains is the fact that additionally to being poisonous, eucalyptus leaves (the only thing they eat) have almost no nutritional value. They can’t afford the extra energy to think, they sleep more than 80% of their fucking lives.

When they are awake all they do is eat, shit and occasionally scream like fucking satan. Because eucalyptus leaves hold such little nutritional value, koalas have to ferment the leaves in their guts for days on end. Unlike their brains, they have the largest hind gut to body ratio of any mammal.

Many herbivorous mammals have adaptations to cope with harsh plant life taking its toll on their teeth, rodents for instance have teeth that never stop growing, some animals only have teeth on their lower jaw, grinding plant matter on bony plates in the tops of their mouths, others have enlarged molars that distribute the wear and break down plant matter more efficiently…

Koalas are no exception, when their teeth erode down to nothing, they resolve the situation by starving to death, because they’re fucking terrible animals. Being mammals, koalas raise their joeys on milk (admittedly, one of the lowest milk yields to body ratio… There’s a trend here). When the young joey needs to transition from rich, nourishing substances like milk, to eucalyptus (a plant that seems to be making it abundantly clear that it doesn’t want to be eaten), it finds it does not have the necessary gut flora to digest the leaves. To remedy this, the young joey begins nuzzling its mother’s anus until she leaks a little diarrhoea (actually fecal pap, slightly less digested), which he then proceeds to slurp on. This partially digested plant matter gives him just what he needs to start developing his digestive system. Of course, he may not even have needed to bother nuzzling his mother.

She may have been suffering from incontinence. Why? Because koalas are riddled with chlamydia. In some areas the infection rate is 80% or higher. This statistic isn’t helped by the fact that one of the few other activities koalas will spend their precious energy on is rape. Despite being seasonal breeders, males seem to either not know or care, and will simply overpower a female regardless of whether she is ovulating.

If she fights back, he may drag them both out of the tree, which brings us full circle back to the brain: Koalas have a higher than average quantity of cerebrospinal fluid in their brains. This is to protect their brains from injury… should they fall from a tree. An animal so thick it has its own little built in special ed helmet. I fucking hate them.

Tldr; Koalas are stupid, leaky, STI riddled sex offenders. But, hey. They look cute. If you ignore the terrifying snake eyes and terrifying feet.”

#10. More harm than good.

“ticks. those fuckers carry around lyme disease and only a select few animals sometimes eat them. they cause much more harm than good.”

#9. Anything Gwyneth Paltrow sells.

“Pretty much anything Gwyneth Paltrow sells on her website.”

#8. California’s largest lake.

“The Salton Sea, California’s largest lake.

The most recent inflow of water from the now heavily controlled Colorado River was accidentally created by the engineers of the California Development Company in 1905. In an effort to increase water flow into the area for farming, irrigation canals were dug from the Colorado River into the valley. The canals suffered silt buildup, so a cut was made in the bank of the Colorado River to further increase the water flow. The resulting outflow overwhelmed the engineered canal, and the river flowed into the Salton Basin for two years, filling the historic dry lake bed and creating the modern sea, before repairs were completed.

The sea has occurred naturally several times in the past, but its current iteration is an accident.”

#7. Another way.

“Periods/Vaginal Bleeding. The universe could have figured out another way. It could only bleed when going pee, that would be awesome.”

#6. By a child.

“That weird font in android phones that looks like its drawn by a child.”

#5. Impossible to peel off.

“Cheap ass paper stickers on new products that are impossible to peel off.”

#4. Why did they even have that lever?

“That lever Kronk pulls when Yzma tells him to “pull the lever!” Why did they even have that lever?”

#3. Awful.

“Those super bright headlights that temporarily blind you if you’re going opposite ways or continuously blind you if they are driving behind you. Awful.”

#2. Oddly specific.

“Velvet Pumpkins with real stems

Just…why?”

#1. Big drama queens.

“Allergies. Fuck em. Biggest over reaction by the human body ever.”

Get on it, science!

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15 Older People Confess What They like About Millennials and It’ll Warm Your Cold Heart

You can’t turn around these days without seeing Baby Boomers insulting millennials for literally every little thing they do. But while this is definitely a popular narrative that a lot of places have tried to push, the fact is that there are plenty of elderly people who sympathize with the problem young people today are facing.

Heck, a lot of them even admire the way millennials are handling things, as this Reddit thread will show you.

1. Smashing gender divides

I’m 62, and I’m impressed that boys and girls in junior high and high school actually are friends with each other. I even saw the kids playing a quick pickup game of touch football – boys and girls – at the middle school while waiting for the bus to come over from the elementary school. Never would have happened in my generation.

2. Fun music

My kids laugh because I like rap as much as they do.

They do get tired of me telling them the original sampled sources and musical roots.

3. Video games are awesome now

61 years old here, and I love my video games as much as younger people.

4. No worries

The phrase “No Worries” after you apologize for a delay holding someone up. Has a much warmer feel than any other equivalent.

5. Hilarious slang terms

Yeet. I don’t know what it is, but that word just makes me laugh. I’ll be 48 this year, and hopefully still have many years before I yeet the f**k off this mortal coil.

6. Changing priorities

Putting more of a priority on personal life and goals than on “career”. The realization that devotion to employer is a dead-end is one that not so many of my fellow Gen-Xers have cottoned to.

7. Memes!

I’m 48 and I love memes. I’m facebook friends with many of my college students and I’m sometimes in tears laughing over the memes they post. I love the levels of cultural knowledge required to “get” them. Even at 48, I still feel rebelliously like I’m getting something that my parents don’t get.

8. Kindness rules

How kind and understanding they are to kids who are different.

My first grader just went to a party for a kid with Downs this last weekend. He invited his whole class and at least 2/3 of them showed up to celebrate with him. Warmed my heart.

9. Adopt don’t shop

They adopt pets rather than buying the designer ones.

10. Keepin’ it casual

Casual dress codes!

Some of the managers are younger than me now and they do not care what anyone wears to work.

Die, high heels!

11. Tolerance

You guys are tolerant as hell. I work in a school and kids can wear nerdy shit and not wonder who they’re gonna have to fight first.

Back in the 90’s I smuggled my Star Wars books into the cafeteria like I was carrying enigma machine codes.

12. Advanced technology

I am amazed that you all can play game consoles with what seems like twenty different god damned buttons on the controller. And use them all almost simultaneously!

13. More living

I like that they are less into stuff and more into experiences.

14. Acceptance

I was a teen when “gay” was still an insult.

Kids these days are so friggen cool.

15. Dabbing

Dabbing. I dab the f**k out of my wife and kids. I open my arms and walk to them like I’m going to hug them, then I dab away.

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