Global Parental Regret: A Cross-Cultural Perspective on Child-Free Desires

A recent study conducted by YouGov, a prominent opinion research institute, revealed that approximately 20% of German parents regret having children and would choose a child-free life if given the opportunity. The survey included responses from 2,045 parents, with 19% of mothers and 20% of fathers expressing this sentiment.

There have been similar studies conducted in the USA that examine parental regret. One notable study, published in 2021, gathered data from 1,518 adults aged 18-74, discovered that nearly one-third (29%) of the respondents expressed a desire for either not having children or having fewer children than they currently do.

These findings emphasize that parental regret is not exclusive to any one country, but rather a phenomenon that can be observed across different cultures and societies. Like in Germany, it is crucial to address the underlying issues and provide more robust support systems for parents in the United States to help reduce the likelihood of regrets associated with having children.

People Share The One Thing Their Parents Said To Them That Still Haunts Them Today

WARNING: some stories involve threats of physical harm or assault of a child

Not every parent is perfect.

A lot of the time, you don’t have to be.

You just need to show up, do your best, make sure your kids(s) have enough food and water for the day and know where they are at any given time. Some days there doesn’t have to be more to it than that.

Yet there are those parental figures who seem resentful of their position, as if they’re angry or unable to let go of their ego in regards to raising their child. From there, the stories only seem to get worse and worse, as we see a litany of stories all starting and ending the same way, with terrible parents.

Reddit user Angry_Cheesecake_ asked:

“What’s the thing that your parents did/said to you that still haunts you to this day?”

Small Remarks With Lasting Effects

“Maybe you could run a few laps”

“One year when I was 12 I attended Christmas at my stepmom’s parents house. It was cool. They get us a few things including some jeans from JC Penny’s.”

“They were the right size but when I got to his house I tried them on and they didnt fit, so I told him they were too small. He responded with ‘maybe you could run a few laps’. He always made off handed comments about my weight but this is ingrained in my brain” ~ hillern21

Tell Me What You Really Think, Dad

“Mom, Dad and I were in the living room watching 60 Minutes one night when I was doing a college program for Graphic Design, which I was really struggling with. 60 Minutes was doing a segment on really skilled art forgers, and I made a comment at the end that being able to fool professionals was really impressive, even though it was obviously illegal and wrong.”

“I added that last part in due to my Dad’s penchant for jumping onto random stuff to be upset at you for, but it wasn’t enough. He angrily burst out that he didn’t want me thinking that what the forger did was impressive, because he didn’t want me turning to that when my art career failed.”

“I mean, I am not and never will be that good, but thanks I guess? I did finish that degree but am changing careers now. All I know is that while I won’t name drop him, that story is going into an acceptance speech somewhere down the line.” ~ morgan145

An Overreaction To A Small Situation

“i hit my brother or teased him or something I can’t remember but it wasn’t very serious (or maybe I said ‘damn’ and my brother picked it up or something) but my dad backed me into the sofa and yelled at me with his face all red from anger ‘I WILL KILL YOU’.”

“I was like 12”

“my parents are usually kind and are very loving so this memory legitimately brings tears to my eyes every time I think of it and any time I need to stop myself from smiling or laughing I think about it and my mood shifts and I hate myself for it” ~ owidh73923sksbha2083

Excluded From The Family

“When I was about 8 or 9, my dad relinquished his parental rights and my step dad adopted me. At the time, he told me he had to take care of his other kids, and just couldn’t take care of me.”

“His wife (during that same final visit) told me that they were trying to have another girl so my sister could have a ‘real’ sister. (All my siblings are half siblings). She ended up having 3 more sons, but no other daughters.”

“Honestly, it broke me as a kid. Since all my siblings were half siblings, I already didn’t feel a part of my own family.”

“My mom couldn’t understand because I was her only kid. All of my siblings had each other and then I was just—by myself.”

“I have struggled with the fear of rejection, and not felt good enough for a long time. It definitely damaged me.” ~ danireeseetc

There’s Nothing Wrong. Some People Can’t Cope.

”What is wrong with you ?! You really have a f-cking problem!”

“By my grandma. I had undiagnosed ADHD, autism and auditory processing disorder, and she was asking why I was not like everyone else. Still hurts years later.” ~ Elisaelle_Alexandre

A Long Series Of Terrible, Fatherly Scorn

“’I hope you die’ ‘Let me just tell everyone how my daughter’s legs are open for every guy’ ‘I’m just gonna go to my other daughter and take care of her since she’ll turn out way better than you’ ‘I don’t care I don’t wanna be your father anyway’ ‘You are just as bad as your mother’.”

“He in fact didn’t have another daughter. He fought for custody years ago only to kick me out.”

“He shouldn’t have lied to court all those years ago if he never wanted me. And if I’m just as bad as my mother he would’ve never tried to get back with her again and cheat on his wife and then use me as an excuse.” ~ GianKMore

A Horrendously Awful Take On A Horrendously Awful Situation

“’If he really wanted to rape you, he would have’—my dad in regards to me being sexually assaulted.” ~ hcomesafterg

Sounds Like An Outstanding Mother

“‘You can die and I wouldn’t care’—said by my birthgiver for struggling in school. She’d also often threaten to kill me if I didn’t improve.” ~ congolesequeen

Just A String Of Them, It Would Seem

“‘You are a disgrace to your father’. He died months before I was born so I never knew him. This was just because I hid my report card from her.”

“Bonus: ‘yeah, I think you’re a whore’. This was because I slept over at my boyfriend’s house for one night. I was 22.” ~ Syntt_

Misreading The Scenario

“‘You’re an emotional terrorist’ because I was suicidal. I was like 15/16.”

“Clearly I was only suicidal because I was trying to manipulate them and not because I was severely mentally ill and being abused.” ~ s9631245

Had bad parents?

While that’s horrible, you’re not alone.

Don’t let what anyone says get you down, even if those people supposedly raised you.

If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/

Women Discuss What it’s Like Being a Single Lesbian Mom

I can’t imagine how hard it must to be a single parent in this world, especially if you don’t already have, like, a buttload of money stashed away so you can hire a bunch of help.

On top of that, many LGBTQ+ people in this world still face a lot of stigma and difficulty on that front. So try and put yourself in the shoes of someone standing at the crossroads of both identities.

Here are ten anonymous confessions from lesbian women who have found themselves in the position of being single moms.

10. Don’t care

Well, that’s a good start. You do you.

Source: Whisper

9. Seriously?

That’s a pretty childish understanding of how things work, people.

Source: Whisper

8. It’s complicated

Being in an environment in which you’re not comfortable being yourself is very trying.

Source: Whisper

7. Come on out

Enter the dating world, it’s totally fine.

Source: Whisper

6. I made it happen

Good for you!

Source: Whisper

5. Are you out there?

*Cue that heartbreaking song from Fievel Goes West.*

Source: Whisper

4. No idea

But the truth will find its way out eventually.

Source: Whisper

3. Hard enough

Did you check underneath the couch or like behind the fridge?

Source: Whisper

2. Cheater, cheater

Oh. Well. That’s um…complicated?

Source: Whisper

1. Ah heck no

I’ll bet ya don’t though.

Source: Whisper

To all the single parents out there of all stripes – we salute you. You’re doing some really tough work, that will hopefully prove quite rewarding in the long run.

Have you had experiences with this type of dynamic?

Tell us about it in the comments.

The post Women Discuss What it’s Like Being a Single Lesbian Mom appeared first on UberFacts.

People Talk About the Perks They Enjoyed as Kids Because of What Their Parents Did for a Living

When I was young, my dad had awesome hookups for tickets for sporting events.

We went to hockey games, baseball games, and even a few football games.

It was great!

And I think we can agree that we all had SOME kind of perk because of what our mom and/or dad did for a living.

Let’s see what these folks had to say about this!

1. Sounds like a good deal.

Cokes for days!

2. Pretty cool!

Heaven for a kid.

3. Bring on the candy!

A dream come true.

4. A good perk.

You thanked him later.

5. Meeting celebs.

Ice-T for the win!

6. Best of both worlds.

Which one is better?

7. Those fees are waived.

Racking up the late fees.

8. Very cool!

Major bragging rights.

9. Perfect desserts.

Right off the assembly line.

10. Life in the firehouse.

I bet that was quite an adventure.

11. Way back in the ’70s.

You could get away with a lot more back then.

Did you enjoy any perks when you were growing up because of your mom or dad’s job?

Talk to us in the comments!

We’d love to hear from you!

The post People Talk About the Perks They Enjoyed as Kids Because of What Their Parents Did for a Living appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share Parenting Tricks That Can Actually Mess up Children

It seems like the world of parenting has changed so much since social media came along.

Some parents think they have a lot to live up to and they do things that might not necessarily be good for their kids. At all.

And there seems to be a lot of these examples out there.

What “parenting tricks” can actually mess up kids? Here’s what folks on AskReddit users had to say.

1. Messed up.

“Pretending to call the police when you’ve done something bad.

Did you know that there are YouTube videos with fake police calls, including a voice for the police officer, and they are always made to be intimidating?

One of them even said something along the lines of “If they have not stopped crying, we will send them to the military camp.” Or something like that. It is messed up.”

2. No privacy.

“I think this is obvious, but apparently not to a handful of parents I’ve met. Snooping through your children’s stuff and making it everybody’s business to know what you find.

Bonus points for being encouraging of your other children to invade their privacy as well. This happened to me when I was in foster care. I was already f**ked up and this took away few of my only coping mechanisms.”

3. That’s not motivation.

“Putting down your child to “motivate” them.

My parents never gave me positive reinforcement, they’d be quick to jump all over my mistakes and they even told me that I was faking my grades when I got the straight A’s they wanted.

It didn’t do anything except sow the seeds of self-doubt that I still have to this day.”

4. Gotta be socialized.

“Not letting the child go to any party or meet friends after school?

Well, this is how you get an adult with no social skills!”

5. Leads to issues.

“”Next time” promises to make the child not complain, but are never fulfilled.

It only leads to trust issues.”

6. A bad lesson.

“Giving kids the Silent Treatment when they’re in trouble

It honestly teaches them to shut down when things get difficult rather than talk things through.

I am personally unlearning that behavior to this day because of how often my mom did that.”

7. You see a lot of this.

“Scare tactics. My mom was always telling me horrible stories to scare me not to do things.

Like yes I get it, I won’t play by the train tracks or the canal but it seemed like everything I wanted to do had a scary story to go with it. Even when I was going to college and trying to decide on a career.

Oh you don’t want to do that because so and so did that and are now homeless, divorced, depressed, etc.”

8. Going about it the wrong way.

“Cleaning your room as a punishment or something to hold over your kid if they want to do something fun.

This will give your kid the impression cleaning their room is a bad thing. Treat it as something you both can do together, encourage them to do it because they want to.

I’ve decided that I will always help my kid clean his room solely to achieve the goal of a clean room, that’s it.”

9. Boundaries are important.

“Not allowing kids to have their own boundaries.

Forcing them to hug, kiss or be touched by relatives if when they don’t want to or ask for it to stop.”

10. Leads to bad things.

“Stop telling your kids they wont be mad if they tell the truth, then get mad when they do.

It taught me how to make a d**n good lie, hell, you don’t even know if I’m lying right now.”

11. Ownership.

“Forcing kids to share everything with everyone – even a kid they just met.

Ownership is a thing. Respecting ownership is a thing. Belongings have a value.

You don’t see adults randomly coming up and asking to “share” your iPhone because they want to play Candy Crush too. (And if they do, most sane people are going to say “no.”).”

12. You can be unhappy.

“Thinking that you should always keep your kid happy.

Always trying to keep your kid happy, always giving them what they want and always distract away any negative emotions will lead to them never learning emotional regulation, acceptance of boundaries, recilience in uphill battles, admitting wrongdoing and learning from mistakes, self esteem, communication skills…

Just the whole shebang.Everything in moderation, even happiness.”

13. Gaslighting.

“My parents would ignore any medical issue and say that I was lazy or it was because I ate poorly (???you buy the food?????) Nothing happened until at 17 I fell into a myxedema coma.

Turns out I had many many untreated autoimmune conditions that have caused permanent issues because they were ignored.

My parents still, as an adult, gaslight me when I say I have anything wrong or still outright deny I’m chronically ill.”

14. Never wrong.

“”I’m your parent, I’m always right.”

“You need to listen and just say okay to what I tell you to do!”

Cut to me as a 25 year old who always has an anxiety attack whenever I stand up for myself…”

Do you have any “parenting tricks” to add to this conversation?

Talk to us in the comments.

Thanks in advance!

The post People Share Parenting Tricks That Can Actually Mess up Children appeared first on UberFacts.

Was This Person Wrong for Telling Their Family the Real Reason They Wanted to Move In With Their Dad?

This story is a bit of a heartbreaker, FYI…

It involves family, stepparents, stepkids, and a lot of mixed emotions.

Take a look at this post from Reddit’s “Am I The A**hole?” page and read on to see how people reacted.

AITA for why I want to move in with my dad?

“My mom and stepdad are foster parents, but living with foster kids is kind of awful. Nothing against them and I really hope they’re getting the help they need, but it sucks. I was forced into the tiny room, which is fine, but I also cant really leave my room. I cant play music or video games, I always have to let them pick movies and tv shows.

I feel like a prisoner in my own home and I cant speak up about it because then I’m being ungrateful. I know its nowhere near what most kids experience, but I still h**e it.

For months I’ve been begging my dad to let me move in with him. I spend all my time there and it would just make more sense. Logically I know I’ll never be able to – he’s working seventy hours a week living in a one bed apartment. But its fun to pretend.

My mom and stepdad dont seem to understand where I’m coming from. I should be grateful – I have clean clothes on my back and food in my stomach. Whenever I try and explain they never listen and point out how much better I have it.

Anyway, I was talking to my cousin on Monday, and mentioned staying with my dad this weekend. She asked why, and I explained that I just dont like being at home. She asked why and if thats why I want to move in with my dad, and I said yes and explained how I felt. She eventually went home and told her mom (I guess?). Yesterday my aunt pulled up and basically demanded to know what was going on.

I dont know what exactly happened but they got into an argument and my cousin came up to help me pack some clothes for a few days. When we went down my parents accused me of making things up, saying that I had no need to feel the way I do.

My aunt didnt really give me a chance to reply before we left. I went home today to grab some stuff, and they called me selfish, saying I’d created an aggressive atmosphere which wasnt good for he foster kids. I said, “I dont care about the foster kids right now. Why do they matter more than me?”

My stepdad told me to get out and I did. A whole bunch of family has blocked me on socials and my foster sister has been posting about how I’m selfish and only care about my own feelings.

My dad is now clued in, and he and my aunt are both saying that I’m not in the wrong for feeling the way I do, but no one else seems to agree.

So, AITA?”

Let’s see what Reddit users had to say about this…

This reader said that the mom and the stepdad are clearly ignoring the mom’s biological son in this situation.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another person thinks the mom and stepdad might be fostering kids just to have some extra money rolling in…

Could be…

Photo Credit: Reddit

This individual made it simple: the mom needs to put her biological son FIRST.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And another reader said that this young person is not an a**hole at all and that they deserve to live with their dad where they’ll be taken care of in the right way.

Amen!

Photo Credit: Reddit

How do you feel about how this person acted?

Were they a jerk?

Or did they act appropriately?

Talk to us in the comments and let us know.

Thanks a lot!

The post Was This Person Wrong for Telling Their Family the Real Reason They Wanted to Move In With Their Dad? appeared first on UberFacts.

This Person Got Into an Argument With a Mother Whose Child Went Missing. Were They Wrong?

If you ever give someone parenting advice, you know there’s gonna be some conflict.

And I get it! Because no one wants to be told that they’re doing a bad job being a mom or a dad.

This person shared a story about some harsh words they had for a mother and now they want to know if they acted like an a**hole.

Check it out.

AITA for getting harsh with a mother whose child had gone missing?

“Got home from work last night, threw some food on and went to take my dog out.

Its somewhere between 7pm-8pm (not yet dark but will be in about an hour). While I’m standing out there I see this kid walking by barefoot, completely sobbing and calling out the name “Susan” over and over. He couldn’t have been more than 8 years old.

Instantly I’m worried and go over and ask him if he’s okay, if he’s lost or trying to find someone (I live in an apartment complex). This kid then breaks my heart. Between desperate sobs he tells me his two year old sister Susan is missing.

That he didn’t mean it, they were playing on the stairs and he had thought his mom was watching her when he went over to say hi to a friend that was walking by. Apparently she wasnt and his sister had wandered off.

I spring into action right away and tell this poor to let’s go find her. I ask if anyone has called the authorities or if he wants me to make a phone call for some help. The kid looks scared and says no, his mom is also looking. It was almost like he was afraid to get in trouble. So I spend the next hour with this kid looking high and low for his sister.

It starts getting dark so I tell the boy I should take him home and his mom needs to call the proper authorities if she hasn’t, but her 8 year old son should not be wandering around alone in the dark. We dont want people hunting for 2 missing kids.

So as were heading back to his apartment and he’s still sobbing and calling her name, this guy sitting out on his patio goes “Oh, if you’re still looking for that girl, they found almost an hour ago. She’s home safe.”

While there was relief, there was also fury in me. This mother had left her 8 year old son wandering around alone is desperation for the last hour. Almost the whole time I was with him, so I know there was no attempt to find him.

I get him to his apartment and knock and the mother answers the door. She goes “Oh there you are Joey. I was waiting for you to come back. Susan is fine, no need to worry. It was just a mistake. I know you wont make it again.” The boy is still sobbing.

Unable to help myself I look straight at the lady and say (in front of the boy). “Its a mistake you wont make again. This was your fault, not his. You didn’t even bother to come find him while he was out there trying to clean up your mess and your lucky you didn’t end up with two missing kids. I’m glad your daughter is home and safe, and now your son as well.”

Of course she’s start yelling at me, telling me I’m q horrible person to say that, and in front of her child and that I have no idea how scary and stressful it is to loose a child and that I have no idea what she went through after her son had told her Susan was missing. I just shrugged and said “It was a bad mistake, dont worry, I’m sure it wont happen again.” And walked off.

I feel like i might have been to harsh on a woman that obviously had a rough night and put her down in front of her child. I was just so angry at what she put that boy through.

AITA?”

And here’s what people had to say about it.

This reader said that this person was not an a**hole at all and that the mom in question acted inappropriately.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another Reddit user said that young kids should not have this kind of responsibility and this is actually dangerous.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another person argued that the mom’s expectations from this young boy were way over the top.

Photo Credit: Reddit

This individual said that young kids don’t have the wherewithal to be taking care of another child…especially one that young.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And lastly, another person said that the individual who wrote the post shouldn’t hesitate to call Child Protective Services in the future.

Photo Credit: Reddit

What do you think about what went down here?

Talk to us in the comments and let us know.

We’d love to hear from you!

The post This Person Got Into an Argument With a Mother Whose Child Went Missing. Were They Wrong? appeared first on UberFacts.

This Person Asked if They’re Wrong for Embarrassing Their Parents Over a Tip Jar

Here’s a pretty unique story that I’ve never encountered before…

It involves family, parents, parties…and a tip jar.

Take a look at this story from Reddit’s “Am I The A**hole” page and keep reading to see how people responded.

AITA for “embarrassing” my parents by putting out a tip jar?

“Before the world went to s**t, my parents LOVED hosting big parties. They’d ask me to play piano during these parties, and I’d usually oblige. I’ve been playing piano since I was 5 and have competed at the state and national levels.

They recently resumed hosting parties now that a lot of their friends have been vaccinated. Usually, I come downstairs, play a few Liszt/Chopin pieces, and head back upstairs to my room because there’s no one my age at these parties. Before the most recent party, I got the idea of putting out a tip jar with a sign saying “pianoboy12345’s college fund” along with my cashapp, venmo, and paypal.

I did this because I’m going to college in the fall and want some extra spending money. My parents are pretty well off and most of their friends are also well off, so I ended up earning almost $1000 that night.

My mom came up to me after the party was over and said I embarrassed her and my dad because the sign suggested that they’re going to have trouble paying for my college.”

Hmmmm…now it’s time to take a look at how readers responded on Reddit.

This person said that they are a jerk for doing this and that putting out a tip jar is just plain tacky.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another person said that while tacky, the writer is young and maybe they’re just fed up with being asked to play at parties by their parents.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another individual said that this young person shouldn’t be working for free just because their parents ask and they should be getting paid for their work.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Finally, this person said that the writer is NOT wrong for their actions and that they should be making a little dough for their efforts.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Do you think these actions were rude or disrespectful?

Sound off in the comments and let us know.

Thanks in advance!

The post This Person Asked if They’re Wrong for Embarrassing Their Parents Over a Tip Jar appeared first on UberFacts.

Memes for Everyone Who Needs a Break from Raising and Parenting Boys

When I was a kid, I was at the house of a couple of my best friends and we had a great idea.

There was this long, fairly steep staircase that went from the kitchen to the basement, see, and also, there was a sled in the garage.

Inpatient for the snows of winter, we grabbed the sled and started taking turns riding it down the stairs and crashing into makeshift piles of pillows to prevent us from hitting the concrete wall.

When discovered and told to stop immediately, I protested, as I hadn’t had enough turns.

Raising boys is wild. Here are some memes to prove it.

10. My craft and your craft

Hey, at least they’re talking to ya.

Via: The Chive

9. Runnin’ out of juice

We can’t know. There’s just no way to know.

Via: The Chive

8. Again! Again!

It can go on like this for an eternity, scientists think.

Via: The Chive

7. The recommendations

“And then this one ALSO played Fornite!”

Via: The Chive

6. Every time

And they looked presentable just seconds ago.

Via: The Chive

5. The conversation

Aaaand this is why we’re doing this.

Via: The Chive

4. A spirited discussion

Looks can be deceiving.

Via: The Chive

3. The phenomenon

See? It’s what always always happens.

Via: The Chive

2. Get high

And then let’s scream real loud about how bad it hurts.

Via: The Chive

1. Get in

I straight up thought for a second that this kid had no bottom half.

Via: The Chive

Boys will be boys, I guess.

What’s your experience raising kids?

Tell us about it in the comments.

The post Memes for Everyone Who Needs a Break from Raising and Parenting Boys appeared first on UberFacts.

A Guy Reported His Own Mother for Identity Fraud. Was He Wrong?

It’s gotta be bad when you report someone in your own family for any kind of crime…

But it happens, folks!

And that’s what happened here in a story about a young man reporting his own mother for identity fraud.

Let’s see what went down and how readers reacted on Reddit.

AITA for reporting my mom for identity fraud?

“I (24M) and my gf put in an application to rent a condo and found out my mom borrowed ~$43,000 with my social insurance.

I talk with a lawyer and he tells me I can either report my mom for identity fraud or pay it off(or declare bankruptcy). I confront my mom and she begs me not to do it and just pay off the debt. I don’t have anywhere near that money and decide to do what the lawyer recommended. The lawyer told me filling out the police report is not the same as pressing charges but I’m still scared what might happen to her.

We use to be very poor and she used my social insurance to pay the bills and provide for me and my brother. This feels like I’m betraying her and her and my brother refuse to speak to me. My relatives all stopped talking to me.

Am I the a**hole here?”

And here’s how people responded on Reddit.

This person stated the obvious: $43,000 is a lot of money, no doubt about it.

And it sounds like his mom isn’t the kind of person to actually pay a debt off.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another reader said that this man is now A LOT of money in the hole and that this illegal.

Photo Credit: Reddit

This Reddit user said that they know someone who had a similar experience and it caused a lot of havoc.

Photo Credit: Reddit

This person thinks that the man needs to report his mom and they’re speaking from experience.

Check out what they had to say.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Okay, now it’s your turn to sound off.

In the comments, tell us what you think about this story and if you agree with how this person handled it.

We’d love to hear from you. Thanks!

The post A Guy Reported His Own Mother for Identity Fraud. Was He Wrong? appeared first on UberFacts.