Category: parenting tweets

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14 Times Tweets From Parents Got Really Real

There’s nothing like getting a laugh at the expense of another parent, right?

I mean, you’re laughing with them, because you know for a fact that tomorrow (or in twenty minutes) your kid could be the one being tweet-worthy, right?

Because they have been in the past, and all kids are a little bit as$hole when it comes down to it.

So quick, before they turn on you – read through these 14 tweets from other real parents who are in the thick of it.

14. The thing you couldn’t wait to quit.

It becomes the thing that makes you openly weep over a bag of milk.

13. All’s fair in love and war.

Now go to your room and think about what you said.

12. Everyone is alive, though?

And now you get to do it all again!

11. Every woman knows that’s justifiable homicide.

Fingers crossed for a lady judge.

10. Don’t even bother because you’re never cleaning it up.

9. A mint in paper towels.

Or two loads of laundry every day instead of one. Take your pick.

8. Or around the blobs of food they dropped on you.

Or the drips of sunscreen that were supposed to be on them.

7. There is room for a third option.

Not much, though.

6. If she’s asleep, you want her to move just a bit.

Motherhood is constant contradictions.

5. Spoiler alert: It’s because he didn’t actually eat dinner.

He’s been holding out for snacks the whole time.

4. Or trying to teach a toddler how to do anything.

Maybe that’s just my toddler. *counts gray hairs*

3. And your partner can’t stop laughing.

Sounds about right.

2. That’s not a bad way to look at it.

It’s better than screaming into the void.

1. Oh come on we all forget words sometimes!

And stand in front of the open freezer trying to remember what we were doing.

I’m feeling relieved to know I’m not alone!

How are your kids today? Fist-bump for getting through it!

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15 Funny Tweets About Parenting

If there’s one thing that’s true about parenting, it’s that it gives you lots of material. Kids are hilarious, both when they’re trying to be and when they’re not, which is good – we might not survive otherwise.

Here are 15 parents who are really getting their little one’s best efforts (for now).

15. Best to be honest about these things from the start.

No need to be impractical.

14. Better safe than sorry.

But yes, let us all have that confidence.

13. And they realize they’ve always known

They just didn’t understand until then.

12. And yet everyone wants to go to the beach?

It’s really not the best with little kids.

11. It’s how she expresses herself, okay?

As long as there was no Sharpie on the walls or furniture, I’d call that a win.

10. This girl is going places.

Watch out, everyone.

9. So much for beggars not being choosers.

That lesson doesn’t apply to fairy tale creatures, perhaps.

8. The most terrifying thing anyone could imagine.

Anyone who has stepped on one before, anyway.

7. They could be fined otherwise.

“What’s in here, a ton of bricks?” is an acceptable substitute.

6. That is a…moment.

Not good, not bad, but certainly a moment.

5. Why do I feel like there must be meaning in this somewhere?

Probably because I haven’t have a second cup of coffee.

4. Unless you’re one of those cry-it-out people.

No judgement but you won’t learn yoga that way.

3. She learned from watching you.

Isn’t it sweet? HAHAHA.

2. Also that terrifying moment when you make a threat you really, really don’t want to follow through on.

Taking away iPad or TV time hurts you more than them some days.

1. Things can get very honest when they’re pretending to be you.

It’s like looking in a tiny judgmental mirror.

I’m just giggling, and this time not because my kid is walking around with a box on his head.

What’s the funniest thing your kid has done this week? Share with us in the comments!

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These Parenting Tweets Prove That Laughter Is the Best Medicine

If you don’t laugh, you’re gonna cry – it’s the advice that gets me through many a long parenting day with two littles at home, let me tell you. They’re demanding, they’re emotionally draining, they’re the source of your worry and anxiety, and for me, alone time is at a serious minimum.

Being able to log onto the internet and find that others are having some of the same struggles – and others sharing their own hilarious kid interactions, helps me get through it!

12. There are upsides to making your kid very comfortable at home.

No one really likes camping, do they?

11. This seems like a pretty comprehensive list.

He’s probably going to need to “rest his eyes” at some point.

10. Eh, I’m sure this grammar rule will be the next one to go.

It’s all anarchy in the world of English.

9. Ooh, I’m honestly not sure the clean room was worth it.

Unless he found all of your spoons.

8. THIS is ironic, Alanis.

Why are old bodies so annoying?

7. Older kids have all the jokes.

These aren’t half bad, if you ask me.

6. The most elusive gift in the world.

This is what we all want for Mother’s Day. #facts

5. No one has the answer to that, kid.

At least we have the internet.

4. Let the cable news anchor figure it out.

It’s full of passion, I know.

3. Let’s find a way to make that happen.

Because I’m running on caffeine, sugar, and half-eaten chicken nuggets.

2. That sounds about right.

But annoying your teenagers is like, the only fun thing about having teenagers.

1. That’s real family love right there.

Dear Lord, please let my parents keep my kids again soon.

I’m laughing, even knowing that tomorrow it could be me posting something like this.

What’s the funniest thing your kid has said or done lately. I want to hear about it!

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Parents Whose Kids Are Giving Them a Run for Their Money

Kids exist to try our patience, right? At least, that’s what it can seem like sometimes.

They find our buttons and dig their thumbs in as deep as they’ll go, twisting and really putting their back into it the more they can see us slowly going insane.

Of course they’re angels and we love them, but also, what I just said is the truth.

We all do what we can to get through days like these 14 people are having – and since it’s not you this time, go ahead and laugh. You know you want to.

14. It’s like he knew that ruining the coffee was the worst thing he could do.

Actually in this case he was really trying to help. You can’t even get mad at the sweet little lad!

Image Credit: Twitter

13. I, too, am confused.

I really want a followup to this tweet because I need to know if/where they found it.

Image Credit: Twitter

12. He’s really got his thinking cap on.

It’s hard to argue with that logic!

Image Credit: Twitter

11. Literally whatever makes them happy.

You definitely have to pick your battles.

Image Credit: Twitter

10. Yeah there is definitely pee somewhere.

Of course, if it’s like my house, there’s already pee everywhere so.

Image Credit: Twitter

9. They do keep you one your toes.

And you know you were barely asleep, anyway.

Image Credit: Twitter

8. Tornados are pretty scary.

But yeah, I imagine a tomato so huge we had to hide from it would be pretty frightening as well.

Image Credit: Twitter

7. The answer is to stop trying to help.

But we just can’t do that, can we?

Image Credit: Twitter

6. It’s a fair question, when you think about it.

Of course, it’s probably the 550th question she’s heard today.

Image Credit: Twitter

5. At least they don’t usually throw up on you.

Who am I kidding? It’s exactly the same.

Image Credit: Twitter

4. See, your marketing degree is coming in handy!

It’s all in the presentation, you know.

Image Credit: Twitter

3. It won’t last forever.

Honestly it doesn’t even work with my 3yo most of the time.

Image Credit: Twitter

2. You just get kind of numb to it all.

But you feel like you deserve a medal when you actually please a 3yo.

Image Credit: Twitter

1. You think you’re high sometimes.

It would make folding laundry more interesting. Perhaps.

I’m just so grateful I’m not raising the only heathens in the world!

Tell us about a recent moment you just had to walk away from your kid! We want to commiserate in the comments!

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Tweets That Capture the Highs and Lows of Parenting

Life is all about peaks and valleys, and anyone who lives a good long while will tell you for sure there are plenty of both. And even if you’re dreaming of perfect days and weeks and years while pregnant with your first amazing baby, here’s the truth: that applies to parenting, too.

It’s one big, long ride, and honestly, would a rollercoaster even be fun if you didn’t occasionally plunge screaming into the abyss?

I didn’t think so! And these 14 parents are here to remind you to laugh while you’re shrieking. It’s the only way.

14. It’s the call of the beast.

See also, anything you’re trying to sneak.

Image Credit: Twitter

13. It is super annoying when you realize you’re just living with yourself.

And yeah, you’re annoying, too.

Image Credit: Twitter

12. It’s how you know someone had a baby I mean.

The internet world is so weird sometimes.

Image Credit: Twitter

11. Every single time.

And don’t believe them when they tell you they’re doing “nothing.”

Image Credit: Twitter

10. So many things you never imagined you’d have to say out loud.

I’ve honestly lost count.

Image Credit: Twitter

9. It will be an awkward conversation.

And no way are they going anywhere. They know they’ve got it good.

Image Credit: Twitter

8. Except now this isn’t a lie.

I’m not crying, YOU’RE crying.

Image Credit: Twitter

7. This is what the #blessed was really made for.

So we all know it’s tongue-in-cheek, right?

Image Credit: Twitter

6. Why did we want a house with stairs, again?

It will be nice when they’re older.

Image Credit: Twitter

5. In my house he says “I’m okay!”

Which is not my main concern but he’s cute.

Image Credit: Twitter

4. You’ve gotta pick your battles.

Now it’s somebody else’s problem.

Image Credit: Twitter

3. Hey, I think I’ve seen that one!

It’s not as good as Hamilton.

Image Credit: Twitter

2. That’s gonna be fun to unpack one day.

Just get them a good therapist. It’ll be fine.

Image Credit: Twitter

1. They really are a mystery, right?

A disgusting, frustrating mystery.

Image Credit: Twitter

I think these people are hilarious and also I need more parent friends!

What’s your favorite way to remind yourself that every day ends eventually? Share your tips for getting through the tunnels in the comments!

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Funny Tweets From Parents That We Think You’ll Enjoy

Parents…we feel your pain right now.

Everyone has been crammed together for so long that we’re all going a little crazy. And the kids…oh, those kids.

Aren’t they just delightful when they’re not allowed to do anything with their friends?

We all know that the statement above is meant to be sarcastic, right?

Parents, read through these funny tweets and at the very least, you’ll realize that you are not alone in your madness right now.

1. That’ll show him!

You gotta mess with them a little bit. Trust me.

2. That is a brilliant strategy.

Now is the time to turn it around.

3. Just let him be.

Being a superhero takes a lot of work.

4. Dammit! Knew that was gonna happen.

Are we missing anything else?

5. I think about 85% of people on the road are doing this.

Are you one of them? Don’t lie!

6. Planting people all day.

Kind of cool name, though…

7. Why the hell not?

What do you have to lose?

8. It can always get worse.

MUCH WORSE.

9. Same here…

Do you think she’ll listen to you?

10. They are remarkable.

And you never know what’s next!

11. This is great!

Giving the mascot the third degree.

12. Pass the Farmer John, please.

Just go with it and don’t tell her until she’s a teenager.

13. You’ll learn this lesson. 

One way or another…

Are those accurate, or what?

I think we all know the answer to that…

Moms and dads: now we want to hear from you!

In the comments, tell us how parenting during the lockdown is working for you.

We want to hear it all!

The good, the bad, and the very, very ugly!

The post Funny Tweets From Parents That We Think You’ll Enjoy appeared first on UberFacts.

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Funny Parenting Tweets You Won’t Want to Miss

There are a lot of sayings out there about how you have to laugh so you won’t cry, or that laughter is the best medicine, or you have to laugh or you’ll just lose your shit…or maybe those are all kind of the same thing.

All I know is that when it comes to 24/7 parenting with young kids (or older kids, or any kids), knowing there are other parents out there doing it all along with you can really make all the difference.

So please, sit back and have a half at the expense of these 15 parents…because today, it isn’t you.

15. This just warms my heart every time I see it.

I need to get my kids some friends so they won’t need me to play with them all the time.

14. “Oh, you already ate? I guess I’ll just cook that delicious gourmet meal I had planned tomorrow night.”

Wash, rinse, repeat…just don’t forget to stock up on cereal.

13. Sure, that’s a good try, kid.

Time is relative anyway, so.

12. I don’t understand why whispering is so hard.

But I do understand why it’s good that you can hear what you under-five is saying at all times.

11. Dads don’t make the rules, they just follow them.

How would you know you were talking to a dad otherwise?

10. We go back and forth on the talking thing so many times over the course of 18 years.

We can’t wait for them to talk, then we can’t wait for them to shut up, and on and on.

9. If you have little kids, they’re all broken when you do find them.

Also so are the crayons and why do none of the markers have lids?

8. Yes and remember they will always repeat everything you say.

So watch it. I mean, if you care about that sort of thing.

7. Ah, so it’s not just my 3yo.

He would eat cookies and popsicles all day and then wonder why his stomach hurt if I let him.

6. One day they’ll be gone.

You can have hobbies and a clean house, at least until they want you to babysit the grandkids.

5. The penguin might smell worse.

In theory.

4. Someone is cruising for a bruising.

It’s like he knows nothing about his own mother.

3. Hardy har-har I would expect nothing less.

Dads gotta dad, y’all. Like I said.

2. Parents definitely need to know how quickly a toddler can bust something.

It’s directly related to how much you’re willing to pay for it.

1. Cat parents really take this whole gig very seriously.

And honestly cats just don’t care one bit.

These are slaying me! Kids are so great and also so awful all at once, right?

What’s the funniest thing you’ve read about parenting this week? Share it with us in the comments!

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These Parents Are Just About out of Patience

Parenting is wonderful, but it can also be a trial – and there are some days when your kids just keep pulling water out of the well over and over again until you’re all but tapped out wayyyyyy before bedtime.

Those are the days I’m super thankful that we live in an age of technology and screens and the like, because I’m an advocate of accessing all of the tools if my own reservoir needs to be topped off.

And these 16 parents really seem like they could use a minute or thirty of help from Peppa, Mickey, or Ryder and the pups so they could take a few deep breaths and back away from the edge.

16. Some questions just have to be pondered.

And you don’t know for sure which ones until they hit you.

15. My kids are going to know better than to even ask me.

Because I couldn’t even help myself with my math assignment.

14. These could be the notes to many things I do every day.

I’m pretty sure we all sound like Charlie Brown’s parents to kids.

13. You have to decide what your daily threshold is for annoyance.

And yeah, outsource that to Alexa if you can.

12. That just means you don’t let them out of your sight.

Oh wait, that was already the gig.

11. She was probably busy for 20 minutes, so that’s a win.

Quiet is another, much bigger, win.

10. The answer to that one seems obvious, doesn’t it?

And yet…

9. We all have our strengths and weaknesses.

And kids that have opinions on those things.

8. All answers are good answers.

Also, this is my answer to ‘what is your favorite fruit.’

7. A little perspective isn’t a bad thing.

Neither is learning how to do math, loser.

6. Everything Is Sticky: A Parent’s Memoir

Because it is, all the time, and it matters not if you mop. You live in a frat house now.

5. Maybe that’s the style now.

You wouldn’t know, because you’re old.

4. Time to Marie Kondo your drawers.

Or make people start doing their own laundry.

3. What even are rules right now?

I mean, what’s the point of fighting the chaos?

2. It’s definitely all about perspective at this point.

The grass is always greener, I guess.

1. And then you just shrug and go with it.

Because you’re not a teacher, you’re a parent.

We’ve all been there, I’m telling you. That’s why we can laugh at these in solidarity.

What’s the moment you realized you needed to just walk away? I had one last week when my husband spilled my soda and then, before we could mop it up, the 3yo was down on his hands and knees licking it off the floor.

Yeah. Welcome to the glam life, future parents.

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These Moms and Dads Won’t Be Winning ‘Parent of the Year’ Anytime Soon

You try to do your best for those little monsters but sometimes you just gotta do YOU. But parenting is a tough gig, right?

None of these folks are in the running for ‘Parent of the Year’ and if these look familiar, you probably aren’t either.

1. Might’ve overdone it

2. Do what you gotta do

3. Earmuffs

4. When you’re in jail…

5. TRUTH

6. Major headache

7. Not cool

8. Might want to listen in

9. That’s why

10. Which one is worse?

11. Ugh

12. Pray they don’t notice

13. Sure…

14. It’s over

15. Flip ’em the bird

Maybe shoot for 2020 ‘Parent of the Year’?

Something to strive for…

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