Category: mental health

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Here’s the Depression Symptom No One Talks About, but Everyone Should Know

Many people still assume that the major symptoms of depression are feeling sad and lying in bed all day, contemplating suicide, and other seemingly obvious hurdles that people face on a daily basis.

This viral Twitter thread, posted by @mollybackes, reminds people that what they think it feels like to live every day with depression might not be quite right. That there are symptoms and barriers to living a “normal” existence that non-depressed people probably don’t realize.

She calls it The Impossible Task.

Her thread explains exactly what that means, how it feels, and the way it can affect people’s lives.

Photo Credit: Twitter/mollybackes

And just like any other mental health condition, it can be tricky to nail down.

Molly offers advice about coping with the Impossible Tasks and how others can help.

Photo Credit: Twitter/mollybackes

She also goes into how people with depression and other mental illnesses can work to be kinder to themselves…

Photo Credit: Twitter/mollybackes

And answers some more common questions. Like treatment strategies:

Photo Credit: Twitter/mollybackes

And what to do if you’re living with somebody who has depression:

Photo Credit: Twitter/mollybackes

Also, what to do if you’re struggling right now:

Photo Credit: Twitter/mollybackes

Ultimately, it helps to be kind to yourself and those around you. And for them to return the favor.

Photo Credit: Twitter/mollybackes

One of the best ways to empathize with someone is to walk in their shoes, and this entire thread is a great way to begin doing just that if you’re trying to understand the people in your life who are suffering.

Oh, and Molly had one last thing to share.

Remember this on the hard days, friends and keep moving forward.

You can do it!

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Hate Listening to People Chew? You May Have a Medical Condition Called “Misophonia”

One of life’s great annoyances is being in the presence of a loud chewer. Someone just sitting there, the sound of their mastication steadily growing in your mind until it becomes almost earsplitting.

If you feel that way about pretty much everyone’s chewing noises, to the point of having emotional reactions to them, you may have a condition is called “misophonia.”

One 18-year-old girl, Ellie Rapp of Pittsburgh, has been aware of having misophonia since middle school. But she’d been dealing with the condition since she was a toddler. When Ellie hears her family chewing their food at dinner, her “heart starts to pound.”

“I go one of two ways. I either start to cry or I just get really intensely angry. It’s really intense. I mean, it’s as if you’re going to die,” she told NPR.

Photo Credit: iStock

Ellie’s mom, Kathy, spent years trying to figure out how to handle Ellie’s reaction to sounds. She found an article online about misophonia.

“And I read it and I said, ‘This is what I have. This is it,’” Ellie said.

Misophonia is not just a reaction to chewing. It also happens in response to other ordinary sounds that other people make, like clearing their throat or clicking their pen. Mouth stuff is a very common trigger.

Photo Credit: iStock

Misophonia is basically the extreme version of what many people experience – an aversion to other people’s random noises. But it can be difficult to cope with, and there’s still a lot of work to be done in recognizing and treating the condition. It’s not listed in the DSM-5, and many doctors have never heard of it.

“It sounds bizarre, but it’s very real,” Kathy said.

And it honestly sounds terrible.

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10 Celebs Who Revealed the Hard Truths About Postpartum Depression

If you’ve ever suffered from Postpartum Depression, you know the effects can be absolutely crushing. Celebrities are no different from me or you, and these 10 shared their stories dealing with the devastating condition.

1. Sharon Osbourne

“I did suffer from it with one of my pregnancies, but I was suffering from depression anyways.
“The depression is so dark, you feel like you’re in a black fog the whole time and you just cannot cope. And you get to a point where you don’t realise what you’ve got with the baby and you’re just so dark and distraught and alone and it’s the loneliest feeling in the world.”

2. Celine Dion

“Some of the first days after I came home, I was a little outside myself. One moment, tremendous happiness; the next, fatigue sets in, and I cried for no reason.” She added: “Some of the first days after I came home, I was a little outside myself. I had no appetite and that bothered me. My mother remarked that she noticed I had moments of lifelessness but reassured me that this was entirely normal. It’s for things like that after having a baby that mothers really need emotional support.”

3. Drew Barrymore

“I didn’t have postpartum the first time so I didn’t understand it because I was like, ‘I feel great.’
The second time, I was like, ‘Oh, whoa, I see what people talk about now. I understand’. It’s a different type of overwhelming with the second. I really got under the cloud. I just got right on the idea of, ‘Where do I need to be the most?’ Fifty-fifty would be ideal but life doesn’t work like that. Life is messy. It was just really challenging and I felt overwhelmed. I made a lot of decisions and I definitely changed my work life to suit my parenthood.”

4. Chrissy Teigen

“…I was different than before. Getting out of bed to get to set on time was painful. My lower back throbbed; my ­shoulders—even my wrists—hurt. I didn’t have an appetite. I would go two days without a bite of food, and you know how big of a deal food is for me. One thing that really got me was just how short I was with people.

I would be in my dressing room, sitting in a robe, getting hair and makeup done, and a crew member would knock on the door and ask: “Chrissy, do you know the lyrics to this song?” And I would lose it. Or “Chrissy, do you like these cat ears, or these panda hands?” And I’d be like: “Whatever you want. I don’t care.” They would leave. My eyes would well up and I would burst into tears. My makeup artist would pat them dry and give me a few minutes.

I couldn’t figure out why I was so unhappy. I blamed it on being tired and possibly growing out of the role: “Maybe I’m just not a goofy person anymore. Maybe I’m just supposed to be a mom.”

5. Brooke Shields

6. Cardi B

“I thought I was going to avoid it. When I gave birth, the doctor told me about postpartum, and I was like, ‘Well, I’m doing good right now, I don’t think that’s going to happen.’ But out of nowhere, the world was heavy on my shoulders.

For some reason, I still don’t feel like my body’s the same. I feel like I don’t have my balance right yet. When it comes to heels, I’m not as good at walking anymore. I feel like I’m holding a weight on me … But there’s an energy I haven’t gotten back yet that I had before I was pregnant.”

It’s just the weirdest thing.”

7. Adele

“My knowledge of postpartum — or post-natal, as we call it in England — is that you don’t want to be with your child; you’re worried you might hurt your child; you’re worried you weren’t doing a good job. But I was obsessed with my child. I felt very inadequate; I felt like I’d made the worst decision of my life. … It can come in many different forms.
“Eventually I just said, I’m going to give myself an afternoon a week, just to do whatever the f**k I want without my baby. A friend of mine said, ‘Really? Don’t you feel bad?’ I said, I do, but not as bad as I’d feel if I didn’t do it. Four of my friends felt the same way I did, and everyone was too embarrassed to talk about it; they thought everyone would think they were a bad mom, and it’s not the case. It makes you a better mom if you give yourself a better time.”

8. Hayden Panettiere

“If you think for one second that a mother wants to feel that way toward her child, you’re outta your mind. It is one of the most debilitating, scary, guilty feelings that you can ever feel. That a mother would not be able to connect with their child, would not be able to get a grip, or would not know what’s going on, for anybody to say that it’s false or created by us, you must have your head examined.”

9. Serena Williams

“Honestly, sometimes I still think I have to deal with it. I think people need to talk about it more because it’s almost like the fourth trimester, it’s part of the pregnancy.”

10. Gwyneth Paltrow

“About four months into it, Chris came to me and said, ‘Something’s wrong. Something’s wrong.’ I kept saying, ‘No, no, I’m fine.’ But Chris identified it, and that sort of burst the bubble.
I thought postpartum depression meant you were sobbing every single day and incapable of looking after a child. But there are different shades of it and depths of it, which is why I think it’s so important for women to talk about it. It was a trying time. I felt like a failure.”

If you think you have postpartum depression, find out more info at Postpartum Support International.

As always, thanks for reading Did You Know. We really appreciate you spending time with us, and we hope you share articles like this with your friends so we can all be part of the conversation.

You rock!

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People who refer to themselves…

People who refer to themselves by name during inner monologues are calmer, less stressed and more confident than those who use “I” or “me” according to a research done by Michigan State University.

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Vitamin D deficiency is linked…

Vitamin D deficiency is linked with many health disorders, including depression. In a survey of almost 8,000 US residents, it was found that those with lower vitamin D levels “are at a significantly higher risk of showing depression”.

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15 Incredibly Helpful Books for Kids Struggling with Anxiety

We tend to think that things like anxiety or depression wouldn’t affect children, but that’s actually not true. As a matter of fact, these can often be tougher for kids because they tend to go unaddressed, or thought of as just being a “phase.”

These 15 books were written to help parents approach the subject of anxiety and other negative feelings. They range from illustrated children’s stories to workbooks that actually help kids cope with anxiety.

1. “Is a Worry Worrying You?“

Photo Credit: Amazon

2. “Help Your Dragon Deal With Anxiety“

Photo Credit: Amazon

3. “What to Do When You Worry Too Much“

Photo Credit: Amazon

4. “Stuff That Sucks“

Photo Credit: Amazon

5. “My Anxious Mind“

Photo Credit: Amazon

6. “The Worry Workbook for Kids“

Photo Credit: Amazon

7. “Listening With My Heart“

Photo Credit: Amazon

8. “Wilma Jean the Worry Machine“

Photo Credit: Amazon

9. “Always“

Photo Credit: Amazon

10. “Outsmarting Worry“

Photo Credit: Amazon

11.  “Wemberly Worried“

Photo Credit: Amazon

12. “Coping Skills for Kids Workbook“

Photo Credit: Amazon

13. “Tiffany Sly Lives Here Now“

Photo Credit: Amazon

14. “Up and Down the Worry Hill“

Photo Credit: Amazon

15. “Pilar’s Worries“

Photo Credit: Amazon

Now get to reading so you can kick that anxiety in the butt!

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10 People Reveal the Moment They Lost Respect for Their Parents

When we’re kids, we view our parents as all-knowing and indestructible. Then we grow up and things slowly change – and we come to realize more about how the world works. Some of us even end up losing a lot of respect for our parents, which can be hurtful, difficult, and strange all at once.

But these 10 Reddit users came face-to-face with their pain by sharing their incredibly personal stories – so I think we owe them an ear, don’t you?

1. The Hypocrites

“When I found out that, despite my parents ostracising me for having The Gay, which is Sinning and means I’m Going Straight To Hell, it turns out my mum has had three affairs that we know about. But that’s okay, because it’s hetero cheating, which apparently is just fine.”

2. The Betrayer

“Right after I graduated high school, I got my first car and was on my mom’s car insurance policy. After a year I had been a very good driver and I wanted to call my insurance company to see if I could lower my rates. Turned out my mom kept the policy active for 1 month so I had an insurance card to put in my glovebox, but then cancelled the policy and pocketed the money for herself.

As much as the monetary aspect hurts, it’s crazy to think that my own mom would let me drive my car having me believe I was covered. I could have destroyed my life if I made some horrific mistake.”

3. The Thief

“When I was a teenager, my mom used to come in my room in the mornings when she thought I was asleep and steal cash from me.

Lots of other things happened after that, but that was the start of it.

Edit: To be fair, they had no money. But I started working at 14 to pay for everything for myself because they couldn’t/wouldn’t help me out with my expenses. Last thing I needed was my mom taking a few bucks from me every morning. I started keeping tabs eventually and she took a few hundred dollars, a couple dollars at a time.”

4. The Favorites

“Oh… so many things.

Mom says she doesn’t have favorites but there are obviously favorites.

I could be the first US woman president and still be a disappointment because I don’t want/have kids

Dad telling me I may as well hurt myself when I went on Prozac as a teenager

Mom and dad bought my twin sister a fully refinished 67 mustang on our 16th birthday. I got a 95 Corolla that would regularly turn off randomly

During the early 2010s my parents needed money. We loaned them 10k. Never got it back. The following year they gave my sister 5k to help pay for her wedding because “she’s always dreamed of being a bride”.

Mom hates dad. Refuses to recognize they should have split up a long time ago. To make sure they don’t have to actually come to terms with their marriage, they continue to let two of my sisters, their husbands, and kids live in their house. When one of those sisters decided to get a divorce (hm, wonder why… perhaps living in a house with 6 other adults doesn’t work well for a healthy marriage?), they stopped talking to that sister. Which is hard because… you know… they all still live together.

I could go on. Let’s summarize with they pretend their lives and their family is pure gold and instead we’re just as f*cked up as everyone else.”

5. The Mental Abuser

“About two years ago, I struggled heavily from depression. My mom is one of those people who doesn’t really understand the depth of mental illnesses, and on top of it, she was verbally abusive and always made cutting remarks about my academics, appearance, anything to degrade my self worth. She broke me down to a point where I said I didn’t want to live anymore and wanted to kill myself. She told me to do it.

I ended up in foster care for about a week because my friends called because they knew I wasn’t safe with her, and she is a manipulator and finessed the system to get me back quickly, and made it sound like she did nothing wrong.

I finally got therapy, but it wasn’t family, just me since she felt she did nothing wrong. She is treating me better and learning to respect my boundaries, but I will never forget my own mother scoffing, telling me to kill myself. I will never be able to respect her after that.”

6. The New Wife

“When my father came home from a tour in Korea he brought with him a new wife. We had never met her nor heard of her until he said he was coming home. We all moved together to his next posting. Three months later, wifeypoo gave him an ultimatum. “Either the kids go or I go.” He called up our mother (I have a sibling) and told her he was sending us to her. He then called us to the phone to “talk to your mom”. I had no memory of her.

In fact a prior step parent told us she was dead. I believed her. So he sent us to meet this stranger with the intention of giving custody to her under the guise of vacation without him. Our belongings followed. He gave us back to woman he divorced and believed was a danger to us just 11 years prior.

I lost a little respect for him for placing his new wife (she left him once she got a green card) over his children.”

7. The Bad Mom

“My mom:

-compared me to friends constantly but would also use my grades or achievements as a way to compete with my aunt

-fakes illnesses when she wants attention or to guilt my siblings and I. She’s lied about having cancer, strokes, etc. When we figured out she was lying and stopped going to the hospitals, she calls family members and cries that we won’t help her/how she’s basically terminal/how we don’t Care

-has basically scammed my sisters, elderly grandma and I out of thousands and thousands of dollars. Just found out about 6 months ago, that she had gotten a pretty sizeable settlement from when I got hit by a car 20 years ago. She denied it and when i showed her proof, she threw my late father under the bus (he was a recovering addict) and claimed he was in charge of all that

-she was a nurse and when I attempted suicide, she didn’t want to get me professional help because it would look bad on her and my problems “aren’t everybody’s business”… so she just medicated the shit out of me for a bit.

Believe it or not, there’s more.”

8. The Terrible Advice

“My mom believes that if you just believe hard enough, you always get what you want.

I challenged her as to why we haven’t won the lottery. She said because she let past experiences influence her thinking as well as evidence. She then said, “I try not to let evidence influence my beliefs. I know I’m not supposed to…”

Yeah. An anti-evidence stance. :/ “

9. The Grown Child

“My parents are divorced. Mom had to move in with my dad for a bit because she didn’t have a place to stay. She wouldn’t clean up after herself or her daughter (my half sister) and she took over my brothers room and would just stay locked away in there doing seemingly nothing to change her situation.

When my dad confronted her calmly about her rudeness telling her that she needs to be courteous and clean up after herself she screamed at him and cursed him out saying things like “I don’t have time to be courteous” and “You’re not my parent”. I’ve never been so angry at another person, and although it was a stressful time for everyone she had no right to be so ungrateful. I didn’t have a whole lot of respect for my mom at this point in the first place, but that definitely made me lose any that I still had.”

10. The Unfair Expectations

“They put my sisters through their undergraduate degrees, but have not provided me with any finances.

I am not trying to sound like a spoiled brat, but it sucks that I am expected to be at the same place they were at when they were 24 – yet I am in student debt, not done with my degree & have to pay everything on my own.8. The Hypocrites

“When I found out that, despite my parents ostracising me for having The Gay, which is Sinning and means I’m Going Straight To Hell, it turns out my mum has had three affairs that we know about. But that’s okay, because it’s hetero cheating, which apparently is just fine.”

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This Viral Post Shows Exactly Why People with Mental Health Issues Don’t Seek Help

According to the World Health Organization, over 300 million people worldwide have depression. Sadly, at least in the United States, your health insurance coverage dictates what treatment options (or lack thereof) you’re allowed to get. So what happens if you’re stuck between mental health concerns and financial trouble?

Nicole Vlaming experienced this firsthand. She was having suicidal thoughts. She went to an emergency room for help, which is absolutely the right thing to do – what we’re told to do, in fact.

She posted about her experience, and the resulting bill, in a post that went viral on Facebook.

Photo Credit: Facebook

She starts with explaining her initial treatment in the ER:

It’s time to go public with this shit. Two weeks ago today, I walked into the ER because if I didn’t I was going to kill myself. I was stripped of all my clothes and possessions, given disposable scrubs and put in a room for the next 5 hours. In the US, this costs nearly $3,000.

She owed almost $3,000, which, to be clear, didn’t include any medications or actual care. She continues:

I was then placed in the behavioral health ward until Sunday at noon. Three nights, two and a half days. Because it was a weekend, all therapy was scaled back, both in number of sessions and the quality of sessions. During one we simply played a trivia game. I sat around watching TV all day and chatting with a Vietnam vet. In the US this costs nearly $10,000.

Sure, she was monitored and received some counseling services. But three days of scaled-back care for $10,000? And that’s not even all the charges:

During this stay, I had blood drawn twice. That was another $3,800. Not shown are the “physician charges” that bring my grand total to over $18,000. I saw an MD once and had once daily sessions with a psychiatrist. Those sessions consisted of rating my depression on scale of 1-10 and asking if I want to hurt myself or anyone else. Real stellar care. /s Oh, I almost forgot to point out the $145 for 3 days worth of meds. I normally pay less than $50 for an entire month.

It’s natural to assume that her health insurance would cover these costs. You’d be mistaken.

My employer sponsored insurance does not cover inpatient mental health care in any capacity. I do have a supplemental insurance plan that will hopefully cover $6,000, leaving me on the hook for over $12,000.

You want to know why people don’t seek help? This is why.

It’s really sad. She did exactly what she should have done. She sought help when she needed it, and now she has a crippling amount of medical debt to contend with. As a country, we can do better. In fact, we have to do better – for her and other vulnerable populations.

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15 Red Flags When It Comes to Finding a Therapist, According to Patients

Admitting that you need help takes a lot of courage, which is why you want to make sure you get the help you deserve from someone who is qualified to give it. A bad therapist might be worse than not talking to anyone at all. And when you found out you’ve been seeing a bad one, it sucks.

It sucks so bad, AskReddit put out a call for red flags to look for according to both experienced patients and other therapists. Hopefully this’ll help keep you away from any real quacks.

#15. Bad advice.

“When your 3 month pregnant fiance is killed suddenly and the therapist says “You shouldn’t cry.”

Lol. Im tough as nails… but yeah bro. Bad advice.”

#14. You’re gonna see someone else.

“When they get angry that you’re gonna see someone else… my old coworker said that to her therapist and that lady flipped out on her…”

#13. No other comments or helpful dialogue.

“Asking questions like “What can I help you with?” and getting short or frustrated with you when you have trouble producing a tangible issue with an elegant and easily forecasted solution.​

Asking “How does that make you feel?”, or something similar over and over, with no other comments or helpful dialogue.”

#12. Gee, thanks lady.

“from my old therapist: “But emotional abuse isn’t really abuse, right?”

Gee, thanks lady.”

#11. When you pay in advance.

“He offers complementary Prozac when you pay in advance for 3 sessions or more.”

#10. Therapy isn’t one size fits all.

“This is a less glaring red flag, but a therapist should always tell you that it’s okay if their style of therapy doesn’t work for you. They should be open about the fact that it’s okay to stop and see someone else. They should also tell you that they’d like you to tell them if they make you uncomfortable/mad etc.

I feel like so many people would have better experiences with therapy if therapists were open that they aren’t perfect, all-knowing, brain-fixing psychics. Therapy isn’t one size fits all.”

#9. Turns out he got paid.

“They get kickbacks for prescriptions.

I had a therapist keep me on an SSRI that made my moodswings worse to the point I tried to kill myself. Every time I expressed concern, he told me to “just keep giving it a chance,” and got angry when I quit. Turns out, he got paid for every patient he got on Celexa.

Edit: Because everyone points it out, yes he was a psychiatrist. I just misused the word therapist.”

#8. Confidentiality.

“They break confidentiality by talking to your parents, spouse, etc about your sessions.”

#7. She forgot key details.

“Mine was okay at first but later forgot key details in what was going on with me, began to judge some lifestyle choices in ways that were pretty much just “oh it’s only a phase” and kept repeating to me that I have a hulk inside me and need to just keep it under control as his only “technique.” Still in the market for a new one but there aren’t many where I live

Edit since there were a few questions being asked:

I was absolutely a very angry person before. I ruined things with my ex because of how easily I would become upset/angry. But I’m a teacher and I’m genuinely struggling to become a better person both for my sake and the sake of my students. I genuinely tried to implement what this therapist was discussing with me, and I know these are just words so maybe it’s difficult to believe but when I had to answer the questions “who is x person, and who is y person? And fell me where you work again?” over and over again, on top of the therapist forgetting that my parents are divorced and so on, it was difficult. I gave him the benefit of the doubt for a long time, but I’m surprised this information was not in his notes.

And for the most part, all that he offered was, again, breathing techniques to calm down and stop the hulk within. First off, I wasn’t so angry to the point I would punch things or anything like that. I would get more upset than angry. I struggled a lot wondering if I was a good person and being treated like I was this hulk just made me feel worse. To some extent I can see why that might sound like something I don’t want to hear. But the reality is that I needed more than just anger management and I didn’t want that to be the main focus and reminder of the damage I had done to my life.

Nowadays I’ve learned to just not stop moving. I wake up early to do a few chores, go to work and spend nearly ten hours of my day doing that (that includes commuting). I come home and I’ll exercise, cook, read, game, watch tv, write…anything to just keep moving. If I stop to think too much I get severely depressed so i think i know now to just not stop. But frankly it’s tiring. That’s why I’m going to do my best to come to terms with everything and that’s why I’m searching for a therapist who can guide me and show me the skills needed to do so.

I am considering online therapy but I would prefer in person because I think that works best for me. I have already looked into a therapist about two hours away from me and plan on making monthly trips if that works out. Thank you all for the support!”

#6. Professionalism.

“Lack of punctuality or professionalism. Showing up late, last minute cancellations, deciding to take a non emergency call during a session etc. These show that they are not committed to helping you and don’t value your time.”

#5. The first guy I saw.

“The first guy I saw was cringing with a fake smile on the whole time I talked. Like what I said was beyond crazy and not things every 15 year old says. It was off putting and I’ve really not gone back.”

#4. Facial expressions.

“Facial expressions of disgust or condescension while their mouth is professing compassion or understanding.”

#3. Texting.

“She’s texting while you’re talking.”

#2. Yes, that’s why I’m here.

“I had a therapist once who simply said “that must be so hard” to basically everything I said. Yes, it is, that’s why I’m here, do you have any way to make it better?”

#1. Go find you a good one.

“Starts the session by telling you that he was once formally disciplined for having an inappropriate relationship with a patient, and then ends it by inviting you to meet up to do some 1-on-1 yoga with him. Later that week, he shows up in your LinkedIn feed for having viewed your profile.

PS – If you have a bad experience with a therapist (like this one that I had, described above), don’t write off therapy. There are bad counselors just like there are bad dentists and bad teachers and bad hair stylists. Walk away from that one and go find you a good one.”

Be happy and healthy, my friends.

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