Category: life

Posted on

12 Wordsmiths Who Lit People up With Fierce Comebacks

It’s not often you get to witness somebody say something so stupid online and then see one of the wittiest comebacks ever… but here we are.

These 12 expert wordsmiths out there saw their moment and took their shot.

So here are 12 of the best comebacks of all time. Enjoy!

1. This gives new meaning to “I researched it.”

Just wow. We are in awe.

For people that ‘research’ stuff on youtube from MurderedByWords

2. You just can’t win.

Seriously, chill out.

Ain’t no right way from MurderedByWords

3. She got schooled.

Pun intended.

Taken to school. from MurderedByWords

4. Aunt Peggy for the win.

We’re not worthy, we’re not worthy.

Pour one out for Aunt Peggy from trashy

5. Like looking in a mirror.

Oh boy, that’s embarrassing.

Ironic that this happened on this sub from MurderedByWords

6. She’s not just about fast food, ladies and gentlemen.

Who uses that as an insult anyway?

Wendy’s is at it again from MurderedByWords

7. Shot down.

Nope, not gonna happen dude.

Ummm yeah that’s a big yikes from Cringetopia

8. Don’t mess with the people who have the police records.

This is just an A+ comeback. Wow.

Guy isn’t exactly wrong about the city, but the city wasn’t havin’ it from MurderedByWords

9. Please, just sit down now.

This is just too, too good.

Now sit your ass down, Stefan. from MurderedByWords

10. That’s gonna leave a mark.

Parents with the last word!

Holy hell! Call the morgue from MurderedByWords

11. Funny how that works.

And that’s what we call a perfect shut-down, everybody.

Murdered nice mask wearing from MurderedByWords

12. True perfection.

There has never been a more perfect burn, ever.

Imagine that from MurderedByWords

What’s your favorite burn of all time? Or are there comebacks you wish you’d thought of during the middle of an argument? We’d love to hear from you!

Let us know in the comments!

The post 12 Wordsmiths Who Lit People up With Fierce Comebacks appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

Teen’s TikTok of Coming out to Her Mom Is Totally Heartwarming

As a cisgender white female, I can only imagine the fear and trepidation that goes into telling the people you love that you’re not straight. You must fear that they will see you differently, that they will love you differently, that they won’t support you and they won’t even try to understand.

I fear that too many kids get those exact, soul-crushing responses from their parents, too, which is what makes this TikTok of Catherine-Sofia Dols coming out to her mother all the more precious.

Catherine, a North Carolina high school student, came out to her mom as gay with a batch of cupcakes that read “I like girls.”

She has to prod her mother to read them, but once she does, her reaction is first “I kind of knew that,” before hugging her daughter and then clarifying in a totally adorable mom way “you mean sexually?”

@catherinesofia3945

she really said “sexually…???” anywho i came out to my mom today with cupcakes #fyp

♬ original sound – catherinesofia3945

The brief but heartwarming reaction – her mother just shrugged and went about her business – has been viewed more than 3 million times.

Catherine-Sofia said that sharing the moment with the world turned out to be great because of all of the positivity she got in return.

She told Buzzfeed,

“A lot of the comments were of people telling me that they wish their parents would react the way my mom dad, and it really saddens me to know that there are kids out there or even adults out there who get disowned from their own family.”

It can be disheartening for LGBTQ kids and allies alike to think that children are being shunned for trusting their parents with their most authentic selves.

Here’s hoping that, as old bigotries die and younger parents move up through the ranks, more kids will feel loved, seen, and supported the way Catherine-Sofia does every day.

The post Teen’s TikTok of Coming out to Her Mom Is Totally Heartwarming appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

Kids Who Are Completely Unreasonable but Really Don’t Care

It’s a fact that kids are not any kind of reasonable before they hit a certain age – and after that, it’s still touch and go. When it comes to toddlers and preschoolers, though, pretty much anything goes.

They’ve got big emotions and no real vocabulary or other way to get them out, and so we, their parents, get to love them through even the worst days.

Which these 17 kids are definitely having – unreasonable, thy name is toddler!

17. I mean it is kind of creepy.

“I once had a 9-year-old in my class become upset during our ‘life cycle of humans’ unit when they found out they had eggs inside them.”

—dai5ytabata

16. Wow. That is some commitment.

“My daughter cried for months every time we opened the door because it opened from the right — she wanted it to open from the left.”

—nanoregi

15. There’s no logic in a toddler’s mind.

“My 3-year-old cried because her bathing suit got wet when we went swimming.”

—sac9488

14. Sometimes your feelings just don’t make sense, and that’s okay.

“My little cousin cried because his games were ‘too fun.’

So we took them away, and he started crying again.”

—stargazinggazelle

13. Yeah that’s a hard no.

“My kid threw a screaming tantrum when I wouldn’t let her lick the raw meat I was defrosting.”

—jmelendez

12. She wants what she wants.

“My 2-year-old had a sobbing meltdown because her brother had bird poop on his window and she didn’t.”

—pamk454893f19

11. Why on EARTH? Ha!

“My 3-year-old freaked out when I told him not to wipe his nose with a piece of bread then eat it afterwards.”

—kellydowlingh

10. Minds are mysterious places.

“My son once woke up crying because paper towels are rectangular-shaped and not triangular.

I had to fold a paper towel into a triangle for him to go back to sleep.”

—lindsayw4b1bb0a39

9. To be fair that is kind of freaky.

“I bought this adorable princess potty that played music and clapping noises when the sensor got wet.

The first time my daughter peed on the potty she started shrieking because she thought the music was coming out of her butt!”

—maryd427057014

8. She probably forgot already.

“My 2-year-old got mad that someone took a bite out of her strawberry.

It was her. She took a bite out of her strawberry.”

—viciousxvenom

7. I mean that is frustrating.

“He got offended that his ice cream was too cold.”

—momot4e8a6be2a

6. That is definitely a moment you can’t give in.

“I was at a hibachi restaurant when the 3-year-old girl at the table across from us had a meltdown because her mom said she couldn’t eat the gum that was stuck under the table.”

—briana4765acc6b

5. Where do they come up with this stuff?

“When my daughter was 4, she spent a couple weeks really angry with me that I didn’t name her ‘Russell.’”

—invasivemage

4. Sometimes you have to just walk away.

“My toddler started screaming because he wanted to go inside the bathroom.

The bathroom door was open. And when I said he could go in, he started screaming even louder!”

—saraf46cbcaf4c

3. Maybe that kind of seems weird the first time you realize.

“My 4-year-old daughter absolutely lost it because I couldn’t take her skin off. HER SKIN.”

—sheenaf4265800e1

2. I would have let that one go.

“My 3-year-old daughter once had a meltdown because I wouldn’t let her shove a tampon in her nose.”

—sativa227

1. Time for an anatomy lesson.

“My toddler cried on more than one occasion because the bottoms of his legs had bumps.

The bumps were his ankles.”

—stephanieg44d08460d

I’m laughing with them, not at them.

What’s the most unreasonable crap your preschooler has ever hit you with? Share it with us in the comments!

The post Kids Who Are Completely Unreasonable but Really Don’t Care appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

15 Times People Thought They Were Totally Fired, but Somehow Got off the Hook

There’s very little that can take a person’s breath away like the moment they realize they done something horribly wrong at work. It might have been an accident, it might have been negligence, but you know it’s your fault and you’re probably going to pay with your job.

These 15 people had that moment, but it was swiftly followed by one that completely absolved them of their crime.

15. That’s definitely a bad moment.

While phoning a customer and trying to explain I needed a key to get in to the bay, I accidentally just like “Fuckinggggg” instead of like “ummmm” like a normal person.

So it was like “Hey there. Calling from (company name). Just needed access to this bay and fuckinnnnggg the door is locked so I need the key.”

The woman on the phone sounded very ESL so I got away with it. No complaint, customer didn’t even acknowledge it.

14. Pass the buck, keep your job.

I used to work as a warehouse manager for a company that sells expensive measuring instruments and managed to accidentally drop a box with glass lenses worth $1100 each. Most of them were broken. The box was freshly in so I took a huge risk by lying that they came in that way and must have gotten damaged during transport. Luckily for me they did believe me.

13. That’s some brotherly love right there.

My younger brother and I used to work at the same supermarket. When I was about 21 or so, I decided to celebrate my birthday with a huge bottle of vodka and some friends. Had completely forgotten I had work the next day.

Manager had called my phone at 6 in the morning, wondering where the hell I was, but phone had died so it went straight to voicemail.

So he called my brother, who went to check on me. Upon seeing the empty bottle of vodka and me passed the fuck out on my bed, he called the manager back and told him that the two of us had agreed to switch shifts and forgot to write it down. Totally his bad, he’ll be right over.

Little bro wakes me up, explains he covered for me, and that I need to sober up and be at work for his 9:00 shift in three hours.

By 9:00, it was clear I still was not sober, but fear of losing my job meant going to work anyway.

Little bro spends the day shepherding my drunk ass around the store to avoid customers or the manager getting close enough to smell the alcohol on me. I sobered up over the course of the day, and felt like shit, but thanks to my little brother’s actions I wasn’t actually caught.

12. There’s no drunk like wine drunk.

It was the night before I was scheduled to have a tense meeting with my boss and a client. The meeting was supposed to be a sort of “peace talk” because of tension growing between my staff and the client who was an emotional and difficult person to work with.

The night before my wife and I opened a bottle of wine with dinner and managed to finish it off before bed. This didn’t seem like too much at the time but the next morning I woke up sicker than I have ever been. I still had this difficult meeting so I got up got dressed managed to choke down some Advil and a glass of water. The minute I get on the highway to work I feel my stomach twisting. There is nothing between where I am now and where my office is except highway with almost no shoulder. Half way to work I feel that feeling in my throat, like a tightening, and my bowels are starting to make terrible noises. I realize I am going to throw up and look around my car for anything to throw up in. I spot McDonalds bag is on the floor so I grab it. Hoping I don’t need to use it I speed up trying to get to my exit so I can pull over and ralph. No dice. I held the bag up to my mouth going 85 MPH and throw up red wine into the McDonalds bag which had the strength of tissue paper because my hot acid puke punched right through the bag and into my lap. By some miracle I had extra business slacks in my car. I stopped at a gas station and changed in the bathroom.

I looked into the mirror and a haggard sallow man with flop sweat and sunken eyes stared back at me. Even with the wardrobe change I smelled faintly of booze and vomit. I went to the meeting and my boss noticed something was up. He rescheduled with the client telling me “I don’t think you’re up to it this morning”.

I for sure thought he was going to fire me for being a huge drunk but nothing happened. I don’t drink wine anymore.

11. Nice old lady is debatable.

Spilled soil samples from an ecology project I was helping our doctorate student on. I contemplated just putting them back into the containers and playing dumb, but that would have been a shitty thing.

So instead, I take our work truck, the soil coring device and in the middle of the night I go to each area again and retake the cores. The bad thing is some sites are on people’s front yards, so here I am, coring yards at 2am on a Wednesday in front of a house like some really shitty dirt burglar.

One old lady heard me and asked what I was doing in her yard, and thankfully instead of shoot me, or let my Lab Director know what the hell I was doing she simply told me that “everyone makes mistakes in science, take those scientists trying to tell us the Earth is getting too warm. Good luck with your dirt study!”

You know what silly old lady? I’ll let this one slide, ignore the fact that we are trying to work out how climate change is interacting with urban ecosystems, you didn’t rat on me. Yes I will enjoy my dirt study.

I did not get fired. No one knew what I did except that nice old lady. And now the internet.

10. The day he almost died.

I climbed in the bailer, to push a stuck bale out.

There’s a camera pointed right at the bailer, so I thought for sure I was done. But nobody saw me or asked about it.

Don’t climb in the bailer, other than stealing that’s the only other thing that will get you fired.

9. So many people’s lives would never have been the same.

Loooong time ago. My first job. In advertising in London.

I was sent a gif by my old college roommate of a woman sucking off a horse and throwing up a ton of jizz. Pretty gross. I forwarded it to his GF to encourage him not to send me this crap again. But I didn’t just send it to her. I sent it to everyone in my office email list. It included clients, some of them pretty high up and very conservative. I panicked like crazy. Luckily, my art director was dating the CEO’s PA and she was really cool. Got the IT guy to delete it from all internal emails, and then sent an email to all the clients telling them there was a virus attached to the email I had sent and to immediately delete it.

No one ever saw that horrendous gif. No one on my agency ever knew except my AD and his GF. I for sure would have been toast.

8. An honest mistake, but still…

Turns out we were allowed to grab free water from the walk in fridge but not Red Bull’s. Didn’t realize they weren’t comped until someone told me I could get in serious trouble for stealing weeks later.

7. Someone was looking out for you, that’s for sure.

I work a desk job at a small office. Bosses left for a meeting and wouldn’t be back for the rest of the day. I didn’t have much to do, so I decided to buy a couple tall cans across the street and watch some Netflix.

An hour later, during a quiet part in the show, I heard my boss talking on his phone. Apparently their meeting got cancelled and they’d been back for about 30 minutes. My desk is right outside my boss’s office, and somehow he didn’t notice anything. He’s extremely strict about work and always complains about time-wasting, but never said anything to me. I have no idea how I wasn’t caught.

6. He could never prove it was him.

Parked badly, my mirror scratched my boss’s truck. He was a prick so I never mentioned it and I forgot about it until reading this

5. No one to blame but himself.

There were some police officers at the reception desk. Not that unusual, police would show up for a wide range of reasons. I strolled by on the way to my office – they were being attended to so I didn’t need to get involved.

20 minutes later I was strolling past reception again. The police were gone. I popped into the facility manager’s office beside the reception desk. We were talking about stuff and I started telling him about this great hashish I had just got my hands on…maybe I could even get him some…

CEO sticks his head in the door and says ‘Sympleton, can I see you out here?’ I stepped out to see what’s up, and he’s standing there beside the same two police officers.

‘Oh shit’, I think.

CEO says ‘Sympleton, these officers are here to drop off a donation cheque for our refugee fund! I was just showing them around the building. Can you take some pictures of us for the website?’

4. Answering phones is one of the worst office jobs.

When I was working as an intern, there was this hideous guy who called the office and started making insane accusations and demands.

I thought I had put him on hold when I called one of my supervisors on another line and said, “There’s some crazy fuck on the other line demanding to talk to someone in charge” but actually somehow he wasn’t on hold; he was listening the whole time. I heard a voice say “WHAT?” on the other line and I was like oh fuck, I’m dead. Lol. So I picked up the phone and just hung it up lol.

By some miracle the guy never called back. I told my supervisor that he hung up and that was the end of it.

3. That’s more than one lucky break.

Spilled coffee all over my laptop. I told my supervisor that it had stopped working and she assumed it stopped because of how old it was. I got a new, much better laptop out of it!

Edit- holy shit, y’all. My fuckery blew up! While I’m sure any person with mediocre knowledge of computers could easily tell what happened, I worked for a small business with no in house IT so I truly skirted by on that blunder. They were never called.

2. As long as you fix it.

Years ago when I worked at a web agency there were several times where I accidentally took down an entire site. Luckily, I usually realized it right away and fixed the issue. The biggest site I did this to was probably Brunswick Bowling.

1. This is like the setup for a movie.

I work at a high volume luxury jewelry boutique, we handle well into the multimillions of dollars worth of jewels and timepieces everyday. When I was moving out of my apartment, I thought it would be smart to save some coin and just take the used boxes from our shipping/receiving room.

Some of you see where this is obviously headed.

I got home from work, dragged the boxes upstairs, and started to pack. 45 minutes into packing my kitchen, I heard a clink on the tile, and didn’t think anything of it, just thought to myself that I’d pick whatever just fell up later.

I forgot about it entirely and went to bed.

Next morning comes around, it’s about 6am. Too dark to see with just the daylight, and too early for me to want to turn too many lights on. I walk into the kitchen to get some coffee going and stepped right on a 9-carat GIA flawless diamond ring. I accidentally stole and then stepped on a 1.3 MILLION DOLLAR RING.

I figured if could take it without anyone noticing, I could put it back the same way. So I tucked it into my lunch bag, and snuck it into our inventory without anybody noticing a damn thing.

I’m so secondhand relieved I think I need a drink!

Would you add a story to this list? Share it with us in the comments!

The post 15 Times People Thought They Were Totally Fired, but Somehow Got off the Hook appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

People Share the Juiciest Tidbit They’ve Learned While Pretending to Be Asleep

I would say that every human being has, at some point in their life, pretended to be asleep when they weren’t. There are all sorts of reasons one might engage in this small deception – your parents think you’re asleep, you’re trying to get your kid to sleep, you don’t want to have sex, you don’t people to think you can hear them…

And when it comes to that latter one, well…sometimes you do hear them, and sometimes what you hear can turn out to be pretty forking crazy.

Which is what happened to these 18 people, who are now going to share the gossip with you.

18. That’s a sad state of affairs.

A screaming match involving the line “I want you to say one nice thing about my kids, ONE!” Followed by silence and doors slamming.

17. Well this is sort of adorable.

I was dozing off in my bed with my girlfriend at the time when I heard her confess her love for me. She was pretty hammered, but she went into intricate detail about how she feels respected, enjoys the sex, and sees a serious future with me.

The next morning I got yelled at for not cuddling and that it was a major issue. I don’t think she even knew of her confession.

16. I can only assume you had nightmares that have only been resolved by therapy.

My parents talking dirty while they were doing it

Edit: I was around 6-8 years old

15. Oh my god why is this so hilarious?

I heard my roommate on a cruise ship getting viciously & sloppily fingerbanged for over an hour while the guy kept saying to her to, “guess how many fingers are in you now!”

14. Aww, not everyone is terrible!

I had been sleeping on the couch in my CCA room in school and I heard my name just as I woke up so I stayed put to eavesdrop. A couple of mates were talking about me in a positive light and saying nice things about me without knowing I was awake. It was really nice to hear it especially since I was a relatively low point at that time.

Every time I think about this I feel good, even though it’s been a half dozen years or so, and it always reminds me to uphold those good characteristics.

13. That’s not the thing you want to overhear. Ever.

My mum told a friend via telephone: I thought my husband was cheating, so now i do it to. I still don’t know what to do. Edit: My father has not cheated and it’s proven. My mum is just stupid, they’re getting divorced now.

12. At least she took the constructive feedback.

When I was a kid my mom would make my brother and me take naps for like 45 minutes. I pretended like I was sleeping, and I heard my mom talking on the phone to my grandma. During the conversation I assume my grandma asked what my brother and I were up to, because she said ImHully’s brother is sleeping, and ImHully is pretending to be asleep. I was like fuck.

She said she knew I was faking because my mouth was closed, and whenever I’m actually asleep my mouth is slightly open. Ever since that day, whenever I’m pretending to be asleep for whatever reason, I keep my mouth slightly open. Thanks for the tip mom.

11. After while I can only assume you never slept again.

Night after drinking with friends I wasn’t really pretending more trying to keep the my head from spinning. I overhear my buddy say to my other friend say I wonder how easy it is to smother someone to death.

10. Some serious wingman sh*t.

I was less than 3 feet away as one of my best friends took a 19 yo’s virginity.

We traveled from the bay to LA to attend a rave with some girls we met at EDC a few months prior. After all the partying took place, one buddy took the older sister to his car, and my other buddy started making moves on the younger sister.

I was “sleeping” on the floor, and was petrified, because I felt like if i moved, it would kill his game. So i sat through the most awkward sexual experience of my life, to help him get laid. It was short, and sporadic, but they both seemed to enjoy it, i think, so i think i made the right decision pretending to be asleep on the floor as they bunny humped on the bed literally 2 1/2 feet from me.

9. Oh they definitely checked.

At a sleepover, “do you think he’s circumcised or not?”

8. …at the same time?

Two people fucking and talking shit about me.

7. Yeah you definitely don’t want to take one for that team.

Back in grade school I was over at a friends place with a couple other friends for a sleepover. We were watching Kenny vs Spenny, the episode where they see who can go around naked the longest or something.

His mom comes in and thinks he watching gay porn. Naturally we pretend to be asleep while him mom reams him out and thinks he’s watching gay porn in front of us.

Sorry Scott, good times though.

6. Was it actually a joke, though? (I hope so).

My mom to her friend, when I was like 8, “I don’t actually even like her. She’s so annoying, I want to get rid of her.”

Naturally I burst into tears. She said she was sorry, she knew I was awake, and it was just a joke.

She’s got a cruel sense of humor..

5. Someone gambled and lost.

A loud fart followed by “oh shit”. And then some shuffling sounds..

4. Kids really never change.

Weekend retreat at church camp – my buddy and another friend’s girl and I ended up in a room with two bunk beds. We were chilling when I realized that I was the third wheel, so I powered down. First there were tests to see if I was awake, then she climbed to his top bunk, then kissing, then her moaning, then her telling him he should wash his hand. I got bored and did some fake sleep-talking. They laughed and continued, but they called it a night without rounding home. She left, and I figured it was best to not give high-fives till the next day.

I don’t know why I waited until we were at his house; maybe she rode back with us. Still, it was my first time playing Super Nintendo, and as he handed me the controller that would introduce me to Yoshi, I asked him, “you did wash your hands, right?”

He was so thrilled to get to talk to someone about it.

3. You could do a lot with that information.

I was drunk at a party and couldn’t fathom the world so I lay down, closed my eyes in a dark room. I heard two of my friends come in, one came over to me and poked me in the ribs then said “It’s fine, he’s asleep.” then proceed to talk about how both of them were cheating on their boyfriends and who at the party they wanted to fuck.

2. This is just mean I think!

I remember way back I couldn’t sleep on Christmas Eve, you know, being a little kid and all. So during this sleepless night where I guess my parents thought I was asleep, I heard my dad say “where do you think we should hide the new puppy?” That was pretty much at the top of my list, so naturally I was excited that I was getting a puppy. They talked for a good 20 minutes about the puppy, saying things like “how should we keep it from barking before he finds him?” before I dozed off.

Next morning, I discovered that my parents knew I was awake and just decided to fuck with me. There was no god damn puppy. I got a Gameboy though, so it wasn’t too bad.

1. That’s more than a little disturbingly funny.

A French girl I met in a hostel came in to where I was sleeping and just sat there. I had just cut it off with her so I didn’t want to deal with her shit so I pretended to be asleep for a few minutes. She just mumbled random shit, she was pretty drunk. Finally what got me up was when, in the cutest french accent, she told me she was going to set me on fire in my sleep.

I should have mentioned that, yes, I did sleep with her again after that. Sometimes you gotta do messed up shit to stay not on fire.

I’m going to have to pretend to be asleep more often, y’all!

Of course, most of the time I pretend to be asleep, I actually fall asleep, because I am old and tired. I’ll have to work on it!

Have you ever overheard something juicy when someone else thought you were asleep? Share it with us in the comments!

The post People Share the Juiciest Tidbit They’ve Learned While Pretending to Be Asleep appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

People Confess Their Silliest Misunderstandings on Twitter

Every adult can remember at least a handful of times when they realized they had been utterly wrong about something that most others consider common knowledge. There’s no shame in it – no one knows everything, and making mistakes is, of course, how we learn.

That said, it can be super embarrassing. The shame didn’t stop these 11 people from replying this Twitter thread with some doozies, though!

11. It was then her dad realized they should have had a chat first.

Disappointing your kiddos sucks!

10. This thought has set many people up to be disappointed.

Some kids, some not.

9. Honestly I’m surprised they ever stopped.

That kind of thing can last a lifetime with the right sibling in charge.

8. Bless this little readers heart.

Because you only see the word you don’t know how to say it.

7. I mean. He wasn’t too far off.

This is pretty cute, though.

6. This is funny but also sweet.

And oh-so innocent.

5. Kid’s brains are just delicious, aren’t they?

I can never wait to hear what my 3yo is going to say next.

4. So boys don’t have things to wash their bodies?

That actually explains a lot.

3. I think that was the premise of Pleasantville actually.

That should be a horror movie, honestly.

2. People from Missouri have accents?

Maybe, because I know exactly what he’s saying.

1. I used to think this, too!

Though there have been plenty of divas pre-Madonna, she does it quite well.

I’m not sure I’d be willing to admit some of these!

Would you fess up to something like this? If so, our comments are open!

The post People Confess Their Silliest Misunderstandings on Twitter appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

People’s Hilarious Confessions of Things They Believed for Way Too Long

It’s cute when a child pronounces something wrong, sings the wrong lyrics to a song, or makes funny assumptions about life based on their own limited knowledge.

It’s less adorable when it happens to an adult, but it is hilarious – and we’re allowed to laugh at grownups, so there’s that.

These 9 people are putting their embarrassing misunderstandings out into the world, so let’s take a look, shall we?

9. Kind of like a library I guess?

I have no idea what she’s talking about with the rest of it.

8. He straight-up admitted it took until he was 30.

Brave man, that one.

7. Well she got the lubricant part right.

This one just killed me.

6. I 100% pronounced it that way the first time I saw it in a book.

I was in middle school, though.

5. The wording is a bit confusing.

To a child, I mean.

4. I need to know at what age they learned the truth.

But he was kind of a villain.

3. Oh my goodness that poor dear.

Bless her little pea-pickin’ heart.

2. I can never un-see that now.

The name thing cracks me up though.

1. Like in Bedknobs and Broomsticks I guess.

That song about Portobello Road really isn’t appropriate for kids, right?


Some of these are understandable, but others…I’m not so sure!

Do you have a confession to add? Share it with us in the comments!

The post People’s Hilarious Confessions of Things They Believed for Way Too Long appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

Images That Will Frustrate Book Lovers Everywhere

People enjoy a good book now and then – on vacation, when they’re waiting in line at the DMV – but other people live for books. They prefer them to Netflix, and if they’ve got a spare 10 minutes, they’d rather read than scroll through social media.

They’re a quiet but passionate lot, and that description extends to the treatment of books and other odd things that surround a book lovers life.

If you’re one of us, you know what I mean – and you’ll quickly realize that there is so much wrong with these 14 pictures.

14. FFS, America.

It’s called an editor. Does no one do their jobs anymore?

This Hardcopy ELA book is complete with useless hyperlinks and and unwatchable videos. Go American Education System from CrappyDesign

13. That can’t be an accident, right?

It’s some kind of reverse marketing ploy?

The only book in the store that’s wrapped in plastic is this one.. from mildlyinfuriating

12. When there’s a legit monster on your flight.

Why would you never want anyone to enjoy that book again?

Got bumped to first class (super sweet) only to witness this lady TEARING off the pages of the book she’s reading. from mildlyinfuriating

11. I suppose it’s job security.

And the jury is out on the “proper” way to shelve books.

10. I guess some people just want everyone to be as dumb as they are.

This makes me so, so angry.

Burned down the "take a book, leave a book" from trashy

9. First of all, congrats on all of the new books.

Those boxes also look rather large to house a single book.

Ordered 27 books from Amazon on a single order. Got 27 boxes with 1 book each delivered. from mildlyinfuriating

8. No, that’s NOT what books are for.

That’s not how any of this works.

This hotel doesn’t allow you to use books for their intended purpose. from mildlyinfuriating

7. If this doesn’t make you profoundly sad, we are not the same.

But also, why on earth doesn’t everyone use the easy peel price stickers? Argh!

This price sticker that ruined the cover of this 1908 book from mildlyinfuriating

6. This actually is so ironic, Alanis.

Or maybe it was the layout person’s fault.

I don’t think I should read this deign chapter in my book. from CrappyDesign

5. This was the idea of a sociopath.

Seriously just wtf is going on here.

Instead of putting in a bookshelf, this coffee shop cut the spines of the books and glued them to a shelf… from mildlyinfuriating

4. I mean it’s your book, you can do what you want.

But this makes me want to cry.

3. It definitely wasn’t a librarian who put in those stickers.

No one who reads would ruin the last page of a book.

This is the last page of a book in my schools library. This isn’t the only time it happened either. from mildlyinfuriating

2. There’s always gotta be one person.

I wonder if they open the packaging on everything ahead of time.

This store sells books wrapped in packaging so readers can pick a book from just a sentence. Somebody opened all of them. from mildlyinfuriating

1. I mean, it’s still better than turning down the page.

It looks far past the smelling stage, too.

Looking through an old cookery book I just found and there’s a squashed frog as a bookmark :/ from WTF

I’m dying inside a little bit more with every entry! Argh!

Which one of these was the hardest to look at for you? I can’t pick!

The post Images That Will Frustrate Book Lovers Everywhere appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

People Who Found Really, Really Old Food While Cleaning Out Their Fridge

Let me say that I am not judging any of these people. I have found ancient food in my fridge, my freezer, and in one unforgettable moment, a potato that had fallen behind a cabinet and was no longer recognizable (except for the stench).

That is how I know, with 100% certainty, that some finds just have to be shared – and I think these 16 items definitely fall into that category.

16. The face I just made is hard to describe.

Nothing about this is okay.

15. Twenty-five years is a long time.

I’m not sure that’s still going to puff up.

14. You know this is old.

Because no one keeps that anymore.

13. These are a mere 10 years old.

They are corndogs, though – barely food – so they should be fine.

12. I did this the other day.

Cheese was a bit congealed but nobody died.

11. That’s what you call vintage.

I should know; it’s older than I am.

10. That’s…sweet? I guess?

As long as you don’t eat the jelly.

9. That can has seen some stuff.

Which makes sense, because who on earth would eat it?

8. Yeah, that’s probably a bad sign.

Too bad. Throwing out alcohol is tragic.

7. I guess that poor turkey got the last laugh…

From turkey heaven, I suppose, but still.

6. That sounds like it was a fun day.

If you’re into gross stuff.

5. 1982 was a good year for pineapple cheese spread.

Maybe the only year.

4. What is “coffee whitener?” Creamer?

If it’s like shelf-stable creamer here I’m pretty sure it lasts forever.

3. I’m guessing she was not much of a cook.

I wonder if she’s improved or was still insulted.

2. This seems like it would be okay.

Isn’t that the whole point of drying herbs?

1. I feel like that bottle might be worth something.

Not the flat and worthless cola, but the bottle.

I am as stunned as I am amused – great combination.

What’s the oldest thing you’ve ever unearthed from a freezer? Tell us about it in the comments!

The post People Who Found Really, Really Old Food While Cleaning Out Their Fridge appeared first on UberFacts.

Posted on

People Open up About How They Knew Someone Was Obsessed With Them in an Unhealthy Way

I’ve had people tell me about getting stalked by people who became obsessed with them and it is downright scary.

For some folks, a switch just flips and they become infatuated with people to such an unhealthy degree that something needs to be done about it.

Has this ever happened to you?

Here are some pretty creepy stories from AskReddit users about when they realized someone was obsessed with them in an unhealthy way.

1. Really creepy.

“I was bartending at a local hole in the wall and I had a regular that was nice & flirty (typical bartender/customer stuff). One day he says to me “You were at John’s* house Sunday morning. You guys a thing?”

I asked him how he knew I was there & he said he saw my car. I was a little taken aback but I was parked on the main road & my car was fairly distinctive, so I didn’t think much of it. A couple weeks later he’d made a joke that I was never home, cos my car was always gone when he passed by.

That made the hair on my neck stand up, but again I don’t exactly live off of the beaten path, so ok. When I really ???? that it was more than casual observations was when he started complimenting me on different outfits & hairstyles I wore on my days off or prior to my shift.

He’d also make comments about receiving packages or coming home with after shopping (“You should find someone who would carry those groceries into the house for you. I’d never make you carry the bags in the house after all that shopping you did on Saturday.”)

It was really creepy and I couldn’t shake the feeling of being watched for a long time.”

2. Followed.

“This guy at college would follow me EVERYWHERE. One day, I just went out to buy my lunch and he came with me. He didn’t buy anything, just followed me. Even when I told him he was making me uncomfortable, he still would not leave me alone. I didn’t wanna sound rude though.

Eventually, I started trying to get on the bus with me when I would head home. That was the last straw for me. The next time He tried to follow me onto the bus, and actually managed to step on, I pushed him off and urgently told the driver to close the doors.

The driver instantly took the hint and shut them. I told him the guy was stalking me, showed my student ID which allowed me on the bus for free, and took a seat.

The next day, the guy had the audacity to ask me why I didn’t let him to home with me. I told him to stop following me around from then on.”

3. DON’T send nudes.

“When she started sending nudes to my work email because I asked her to stop contacting me. I changed my snapchat account and blocked her number, but my work email is on my company’s website, so she found it.

That was a awkward conversation with my IT guys.”

4. Ex-girlfriend.

“When I was stationed in Korea and my ex girlfriend kept emailing my wife from different emails pretending to be women in Korea that I was cheating on her with.

My wife and I had a pretty good laugh about it and she eventually came clean. Her husband was not happy about her still obsessing over me.”

5. At church.

“My husband was deployed in Afghanistan so I had to go to church alone. One week, an older man (maybe 65) approached and said, “Can I sit here?” I said sure. We had a bit of conversation and he said, “My wife died a few weeks ago and I was just praying this morning for God to send an angel I could sit with at church today.” He seemed like a sweetheart, I felt bad for him.

He sat next to me for a few weeks in a row. It didn’t bother me too much. I brought him some homemade jam. He told me about how his son was also deployed.

I mentioned he should really try getting into a church small group, that it would be great company for him. I set him up with one of the best. He said he wasn’t sure how to get to the venue. If he gave me his number, could I tell him where the place was? He was confused. I said, sure.

Well, once I texted him the directions, I don’t think he ever went to the group, but he had my phone number. He started calling 8+ times a day, saying “Hello beautiful” and begging me to meet him at Waffle House.

For the remainder of my husband’s 6-month deployment, I did not go to church. I was really worried about running into that guy. I blocked his number and luckily have never seen him again. Months after my husband got back, I told him what happened and of course he was livid.”

6. Total psycho.

“I broke up with a physically abusive boyfriend, and at the time I worked about a 25 minute drive from where I lived (always drove the same road home).

My schedule never changed and I began seeing his car and occasionally his friends’ cars along my drive, always parked off from the road a little and around some seriously sharp corners. At first I didn’t think anything of it, until it began happening at night (I’d do inventory every Tuesday night and be at work until 10pm; this was my only full night shift).

This went on for about a month, until I started switching my routes to and from work because I was getting creeped out. Easter ended up rolling around and I, again, had to stay late to help my coworker change the signage (I worked at Subway). It was getting close to 9pm, and the work phone began ringing off the hook (was my ex).

My coworker, who knew what was going on, just muted the phone and we continued doing what we needed to do. Shortly after we saw my ex standing outside, in the middle of the road staring into the restaurant.

I hid behind the counter as soon as I could and my coworker ended up telling me when he left. Got calmed down until we got to my car to find out he broke into my car and left a bunch of weed and a threatening note.

I bought a new car the next week; fully equipped with a very loud alarm.”

7. Trying to be friendly.

“As a bus driver you’re expected to be cheerful and chat with whoever while idle. A regular passenger started riding around, always in the front seat. Over a week or two the conversation got quite personal, always by her initiative.

I told my supervisor about this just to cover my ass. Then she started to bring me gifts, cookies, candy beverages. Finally, she invited me over for a meal, so her mom could meet her boyfriend! I had zero interest in the young woman, didn’t want anything to do with her.

Luckily, she moved or just avoided the bus during my shift.”

8. Stalked by Dad.

“When my dad showed up to my place of work.

We had been estranged, but he knew I worked at Starbucks and had traveled from location to location to figure out where I had transferred to and when my shifts were scheduled.

Even had the balls to call the store and pretend to be me to get my schedule information. I saw his vehicle parked out front and freaked out and ran inside.

He followed in after about thirty minutes (right as the morning rush was hitting full swing) and started berating me in front of all my coworkers and customers.

Thats the day I went and learned about restraining orders.”

9. No thanks.

“When he started acting like he couldn’t survive without me directly by his side at all times. I had met him a week earlier, only spoke to him briefly, and never flirted or had any romantic or sexual interactions with him.

He literally just stalked me and physically put himself at my side like a Siamese twin, going as far as pushing other people away from “his” spot, and threatening to kill himself when I brought it up with him. Yeah, no thanks.”

10. That’s kind of scary.

“My sister brought home “my” spiral notebook from school.

She thought it was mine because it had my name written and doodled covering every page.

Turns out it was a girl who was obsessed with me.”

11. Online crazies.

“I was chatting with a gal online through a dating site.

She was nice enough and we were having good conversations, but had not yet even began speaking on the phone. It turns out a friend of hers was friends with one of my friends. Small world.

I’m at home one day puttering around and I hear a knock at my door, I look out the window and see a car I don’t recognize. My hink meter starts pinging so I pull a butcher knife, brace my foot so the door can only open a bit and crack the door.

She is standing there and tells me she got the address from my friend and asking to come in. I was weirded out and declined, she got upset and started crying and telling me how this was supposed to be a pleasant surprise. I tried to send her on her way gently and she got pissed and stormed off and drove away.

I thought that was it. Then she starts emailing me saying she loves me, then starts calling me, (my idiot friend gave her my number), and leaving gifts at my door that would be there in the morning.i lived in Mesa, AZ, she was in Tucson about an hour away. I eventually had to threaten her with a restraining order.

My friend had talked to hers about what was going on she said, “Oh yeah, she’s nuts, she’s done this before.”

I felt a lot better when I left the state.”

12. I WANT YOU BACK.

“Not me but my sister is obsessed with her ex. She cheated on him and is desperate to get him back. She constantly tries to get in touch with him like getting my little brother to FaceTime him through his iPad cause she knows he won’t answer her.

She says she thinks about him every day and will text him on holidays like Easter just to say have a nice day or whatever. They had a conversation and after that she looked up the program he was in at the college he goes to and found out that his program was canceled because of covid19 so she doesn’t understand why he hasn’t gotten in contact with her.

She wrote a letter a couple days ago and is planning to go to his house and leave it at his door. Originally, her plan was to pay me to go ring the doorbell and give it to him but like hell nah lol. Whenever I tell her to back off she just says I don’t understand cause I’ve never been in a relationship:/ it’s been months of crap like this.”

13. Obsessed with the teacher.

“It was really sad.

It was a High School student I was teaching. She found out where I lived and used to conveniently be in the area and then just parked in front of my house. I had to report her. We all met with the principal and a counselor.

She was a senior so we all agreed if she stopped doing that and take another class I wasn’t teaching, we’d let her graduate at the school.”

14. Fatal attraction.

“Had a friend.

She was a bit eccentric, we were really close until she started going totally off the edge – hid my bicycle, stood outside my house screaming obscenities, told everyone we had a sexual relationship, belittled my abusive past, screaming right into my face.

Tried to stab our common friend… Twice. The thing that pulled alarms in my head was when i told her I’ll be heading home from my boyfriends soon and she can come for a visit in a couple of hours if she wants.

Got home in under an hour, she was waiting near my apartment building and started accusing me of lying to her, there was absolutely no telling her that I wanted to settle a little, take a shower and eat something, I did not say I’d be home in two hours. I managed to cut her out of my life.

Few years later she started blowing up my mothers phone (one cant find my number anywhere) demanding for her to give my number explaining all this pretty lunatic nonsense, but how she needed me because I’m one of her apostles and she needs me to start her own religion, because she is “his son, another of Adam and Eve”, and this was not even the craziest shit.

Quite confidental seeing that a few years before this she was super paranoid about my mother since she works for the military. And yes, previously this girl had a delusion that she is re-incarnated Jesus.

After this I’ve heard through friends that I’m Peter, Venus and latest probably was that I’m a whore. So yeah that was the point I was more than sure she was obsessed with me.”

15. That’s wild.

“She went to my grandmother’s house and got my phone number from beside the phone on the little board in the kitchen…

…5 years after we dated and I had severed all ties with her and anyone that still associated with her.”

Yikes…be careful out there, everyone.

Have you ever had someone develop an unhealthy obsession with you? Or maybe someone even started stalking you at some point?

If so, please share your stories with us in the comments!

The post People Open up About How They Knew Someone Was Obsessed With Them in an Unhealthy Way appeared first on UberFacts.