Category: life

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People Share the Juiciest Tidbit They’ve Learned While Pretending to Be Asleep

I would say that every human being has, at some point in their life, pretended to be asleep when they weren’t. There are all sorts of reasons one might engage in this small deception – your parents think you’re asleep, you’re trying to get your kid to sleep, you don’t want to have sex, you don’t people to think you can hear them…

And when it comes to that latter one, well…sometimes you do hear them, and sometimes what you hear can turn out to be pretty forking crazy.

Which is what happened to these 18 people, who are now going to share the gossip with you.

18. That’s a sad state of affairs.

A screaming match involving the line “I want you to say one nice thing about my kids, ONE!” Followed by silence and doors slamming.

17. Well this is sort of adorable.

I was dozing off in my bed with my girlfriend at the time when I heard her confess her love for me. She was pretty hammered, but she went into intricate detail about how she feels respected, enjoys the sex, and sees a serious future with me.

The next morning I got yelled at for not cuddling and that it was a major issue. I don’t think she even knew of her confession.

16. I can only assume you had nightmares that have only been resolved by therapy.

My parents talking dirty while they were doing it

Edit: I was around 6-8 years old

15. Oh my god why is this so hilarious?

I heard my roommate on a cruise ship getting viciously & sloppily fingerbanged for over an hour while the guy kept saying to her to, “guess how many fingers are in you now!”

14. Aww, not everyone is terrible!

I had been sleeping on the couch in my CCA room in school and I heard my name just as I woke up so I stayed put to eavesdrop. A couple of mates were talking about me in a positive light and saying nice things about me without knowing I was awake. It was really nice to hear it especially since I was a relatively low point at that time.

Every time I think about this I feel good, even though it’s been a half dozen years or so, and it always reminds me to uphold those good characteristics.

13. That’s not the thing you want to overhear. Ever.

My mum told a friend via telephone: I thought my husband was cheating, so now i do it to. I still don’t know what to do. Edit: My father has not cheated and it’s proven. My mum is just stupid, they’re getting divorced now.

12. At least she took the constructive feedback.

When I was a kid my mom would make my brother and me take naps for like 45 minutes. I pretended like I was sleeping, and I heard my mom talking on the phone to my grandma. During the conversation I assume my grandma asked what my brother and I were up to, because she said ImHully’s brother is sleeping, and ImHully is pretending to be asleep. I was like fuck.

She said she knew I was faking because my mouth was closed, and whenever I’m actually asleep my mouth is slightly open. Ever since that day, whenever I’m pretending to be asleep for whatever reason, I keep my mouth slightly open. Thanks for the tip mom.

11. After while I can only assume you never slept again.

Night after drinking with friends I wasn’t really pretending more trying to keep the my head from spinning. I overhear my buddy say to my other friend say I wonder how easy it is to smother someone to death.

10. Some serious wingman sh*t.

I was less than 3 feet away as one of my best friends took a 19 yo’s virginity.

We traveled from the bay to LA to attend a rave with some girls we met at EDC a few months prior. After all the partying took place, one buddy took the older sister to his car, and my other buddy started making moves on the younger sister.

I was “sleeping” on the floor, and was petrified, because I felt like if i moved, it would kill his game. So i sat through the most awkward sexual experience of my life, to help him get laid. It was short, and sporadic, but they both seemed to enjoy it, i think, so i think i made the right decision pretending to be asleep on the floor as they bunny humped on the bed literally 2 1/2 feet from me.

9. Oh they definitely checked.

At a sleepover, “do you think he’s circumcised or not?”

8. …at the same time?

Two people fucking and talking shit about me.

7. Yeah you definitely don’t want to take one for that team.

Back in grade school I was over at a friends place with a couple other friends for a sleepover. We were watching Kenny vs Spenny, the episode where they see who can go around naked the longest or something.

His mom comes in and thinks he watching gay porn. Naturally we pretend to be asleep while him mom reams him out and thinks he’s watching gay porn in front of us.

Sorry Scott, good times though.

6. Was it actually a joke, though? (I hope so).

My mom to her friend, when I was like 8, “I don’t actually even like her. She’s so annoying, I want to get rid of her.”

Naturally I burst into tears. She said she was sorry, she knew I was awake, and it was just a joke.

She’s got a cruel sense of humor..

5. Someone gambled and lost.

A loud fart followed by “oh shit”. And then some shuffling sounds..

4. Kids really never change.

Weekend retreat at church camp – my buddy and another friend’s girl and I ended up in a room with two bunk beds. We were chilling when I realized that I was the third wheel, so I powered down. First there were tests to see if I was awake, then she climbed to his top bunk, then kissing, then her moaning, then her telling him he should wash his hand. I got bored and did some fake sleep-talking. They laughed and continued, but they called it a night without rounding home. She left, and I figured it was best to not give high-fives till the next day.

I don’t know why I waited until we were at his house; maybe she rode back with us. Still, it was my first time playing Super Nintendo, and as he handed me the controller that would introduce me to Yoshi, I asked him, “you did wash your hands, right?”

He was so thrilled to get to talk to someone about it.

3. You could do a lot with that information.

I was drunk at a party and couldn’t fathom the world so I lay down, closed my eyes in a dark room. I heard two of my friends come in, one came over to me and poked me in the ribs then said “It’s fine, he’s asleep.” then proceed to talk about how both of them were cheating on their boyfriends and who at the party they wanted to fuck.

2. This is just mean I think!

I remember way back I couldn’t sleep on Christmas Eve, you know, being a little kid and all. So during this sleepless night where I guess my parents thought I was asleep, I heard my dad say “where do you think we should hide the new puppy?” That was pretty much at the top of my list, so naturally I was excited that I was getting a puppy. They talked for a good 20 minutes about the puppy, saying things like “how should we keep it from barking before he finds him?” before I dozed off.

Next morning, I discovered that my parents knew I was awake and just decided to fuck with me. There was no god damn puppy. I got a Gameboy though, so it wasn’t too bad.

1. That’s more than a little disturbingly funny.

A French girl I met in a hostel came in to where I was sleeping and just sat there. I had just cut it off with her so I didn’t want to deal with her shit so I pretended to be asleep for a few minutes. She just mumbled random shit, she was pretty drunk. Finally what got me up was when, in the cutest french accent, she told me she was going to set me on fire in my sleep.

I should have mentioned that, yes, I did sleep with her again after that. Sometimes you gotta do messed up shit to stay not on fire.

I’m going to have to pretend to be asleep more often, y’all!

Of course, most of the time I pretend to be asleep, I actually fall asleep, because I am old and tired. I’ll have to work on it!

Have you ever overheard something juicy when someone else thought you were asleep? Share it with us in the comments!

The post People Share the Juiciest Tidbit They’ve Learned While Pretending to Be Asleep appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Confess Their Silliest Misunderstandings on Twitter

Every adult can remember at least a handful of times when they realized they had been utterly wrong about something that most others consider common knowledge. There’s no shame in it – no one knows everything, and making mistakes is, of course, how we learn.

That said, it can be super embarrassing. The shame didn’t stop these 11 people from replying this Twitter thread with some doozies, though!

11. It was then her dad realized they should have had a chat first.

Disappointing your kiddos sucks!

10. This thought has set many people up to be disappointed.

Some kids, some not.

9. Honestly I’m surprised they ever stopped.

That kind of thing can last a lifetime with the right sibling in charge.

8. Bless this little readers heart.

Because you only see the word you don’t know how to say it.

7. I mean. He wasn’t too far off.

This is pretty cute, though.

6. This is funny but also sweet.

And oh-so innocent.

5. Kid’s brains are just delicious, aren’t they?

I can never wait to hear what my 3yo is going to say next.

4. So boys don’t have things to wash their bodies?

That actually explains a lot.

3. I think that was the premise of Pleasantville actually.

That should be a horror movie, honestly.

2. People from Missouri have accents?

Maybe, because I know exactly what he’s saying.

1. I used to think this, too!

Though there have been plenty of divas pre-Madonna, she does it quite well.

I’m not sure I’d be willing to admit some of these!

Would you fess up to something like this? If so, our comments are open!

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People’s Hilarious Confessions of Things They Believed for Way Too Long

It’s cute when a child pronounces something wrong, sings the wrong lyrics to a song, or makes funny assumptions about life based on their own limited knowledge.

It’s less adorable when it happens to an adult, but it is hilarious – and we’re allowed to laugh at grownups, so there’s that.

These 9 people are putting their embarrassing misunderstandings out into the world, so let’s take a look, shall we?

9. Kind of like a library I guess?

I have no idea what she’s talking about with the rest of it.

8. He straight-up admitted it took until he was 30.

Brave man, that one.

7. Well she got the lubricant part right.

This one just killed me.

6. I 100% pronounced it that way the first time I saw it in a book.

I was in middle school, though.

5. The wording is a bit confusing.

To a child, I mean.

4. I need to know at what age they learned the truth.

But he was kind of a villain.

3. Oh my goodness that poor dear.

Bless her little pea-pickin’ heart.

2. I can never un-see that now.

The name thing cracks me up though.

1. Like in Bedknobs and Broomsticks I guess.

That song about Portobello Road really isn’t appropriate for kids, right?


Some of these are understandable, but others…I’m not so sure!

Do you have a confession to add? Share it with us in the comments!

The post People’s Hilarious Confessions of Things They Believed for Way Too Long appeared first on UberFacts.

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Images That Will Frustrate Book Lovers Everywhere

People enjoy a good book now and then – on vacation, when they’re waiting in line at the DMV – but other people live for books. They prefer them to Netflix, and if they’ve got a spare 10 minutes, they’d rather read than scroll through social media.

They’re a quiet but passionate lot, and that description extends to the treatment of books and other odd things that surround a book lovers life.

If you’re one of us, you know what I mean – and you’ll quickly realize that there is so much wrong with these 14 pictures.

14. FFS, America.

It’s called an editor. Does no one do their jobs anymore?

This Hardcopy ELA book is complete with useless hyperlinks and and unwatchable videos. Go American Education System from CrappyDesign

13. That can’t be an accident, right?

It’s some kind of reverse marketing ploy?

The only book in the store that’s wrapped in plastic is this one.. from mildlyinfuriating

12. When there’s a legit monster on your flight.

Why would you never want anyone to enjoy that book again?

Got bumped to first class (super sweet) only to witness this lady TEARING off the pages of the book she’s reading. from mildlyinfuriating

11. I suppose it’s job security.

And the jury is out on the “proper” way to shelve books.

10. I guess some people just want everyone to be as dumb as they are.

This makes me so, so angry.

Burned down the "take a book, leave a book" from trashy

9. First of all, congrats on all of the new books.

Those boxes also look rather large to house a single book.

Ordered 27 books from Amazon on a single order. Got 27 boxes with 1 book each delivered. from mildlyinfuriating

8. No, that’s NOT what books are for.

That’s not how any of this works.

This hotel doesn’t allow you to use books for their intended purpose. from mildlyinfuriating

7. If this doesn’t make you profoundly sad, we are not the same.

But also, why on earth doesn’t everyone use the easy peel price stickers? Argh!

This price sticker that ruined the cover of this 1908 book from mildlyinfuriating

6. This actually is so ironic, Alanis.

Or maybe it was the layout person’s fault.

I don’t think I should read this deign chapter in my book. from CrappyDesign

5. This was the idea of a sociopath.

Seriously just wtf is going on here.

Instead of putting in a bookshelf, this coffee shop cut the spines of the books and glued them to a shelf… from mildlyinfuriating

4. I mean it’s your book, you can do what you want.

But this makes me want to cry.

3. It definitely wasn’t a librarian who put in those stickers.

No one who reads would ruin the last page of a book.

This is the last page of a book in my schools library. This isn’t the only time it happened either. from mildlyinfuriating

2. There’s always gotta be one person.

I wonder if they open the packaging on everything ahead of time.

This store sells books wrapped in packaging so readers can pick a book from just a sentence. Somebody opened all of them. from mildlyinfuriating

1. I mean, it’s still better than turning down the page.

It looks far past the smelling stage, too.

Looking through an old cookery book I just found and there’s a squashed frog as a bookmark :/ from WTF

I’m dying inside a little bit more with every entry! Argh!

Which one of these was the hardest to look at for you? I can’t pick!

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People Who Found Really, Really Old Food While Cleaning Out Their Fridge

Let me say that I am not judging any of these people. I have found ancient food in my fridge, my freezer, and in one unforgettable moment, a potato that had fallen behind a cabinet and was no longer recognizable (except for the stench).

That is how I know, with 100% certainty, that some finds just have to be shared – and I think these 16 items definitely fall into that category.

16. The face I just made is hard to describe.

Nothing about this is okay.

15. Twenty-five years is a long time.

I’m not sure that’s still going to puff up.

14. You know this is old.

Because no one keeps that anymore.

13. These are a mere 10 years old.

They are corndogs, though – barely food – so they should be fine.

12. I did this the other day.

Cheese was a bit congealed but nobody died.

11. That’s what you call vintage.

I should know; it’s older than I am.

10. That’s…sweet? I guess?

As long as you don’t eat the jelly.

9. That can has seen some stuff.

Which makes sense, because who on earth would eat it?

8. Yeah, that’s probably a bad sign.

Too bad. Throwing out alcohol is tragic.

7. I guess that poor turkey got the last laugh…

From turkey heaven, I suppose, but still.

6. That sounds like it was a fun day.

If you’re into gross stuff.

5. 1982 was a good year for pineapple cheese spread.

Maybe the only year.

4. What is “coffee whitener?” Creamer?

If it’s like shelf-stable creamer here I’m pretty sure it lasts forever.

3. I’m guessing she was not much of a cook.

I wonder if she’s improved or was still insulted.

2. This seems like it would be okay.

Isn’t that the whole point of drying herbs?

1. I feel like that bottle might be worth something.

Not the flat and worthless cola, but the bottle.

I am as stunned as I am amused – great combination.

What’s the oldest thing you’ve ever unearthed from a freezer? Tell us about it in the comments!

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People Open up About How They Knew Someone Was Obsessed With Them in an Unhealthy Way

I’ve had people tell me about getting stalked by people who became obsessed with them and it is downright scary.

For some folks, a switch just flips and they become infatuated with people to such an unhealthy degree that something needs to be done about it.

Has this ever happened to you?

Here are some pretty creepy stories from AskReddit users about when they realized someone was obsessed with them in an unhealthy way.

1. Really creepy.

“I was bartending at a local hole in the wall and I had a regular that was nice & flirty (typical bartender/customer stuff). One day he says to me “You were at John’s* house Sunday morning. You guys a thing?”

I asked him how he knew I was there & he said he saw my car. I was a little taken aback but I was parked on the main road & my car was fairly distinctive, so I didn’t think much of it. A couple weeks later he’d made a joke that I was never home, cos my car was always gone when he passed by.

That made the hair on my neck stand up, but again I don’t exactly live off of the beaten path, so ok. When I really ???? that it was more than casual observations was when he started complimenting me on different outfits & hairstyles I wore on my days off or prior to my shift.

He’d also make comments about receiving packages or coming home with after shopping (“You should find someone who would carry those groceries into the house for you. I’d never make you carry the bags in the house after all that shopping you did on Saturday.”)

It was really creepy and I couldn’t shake the feeling of being watched for a long time.”

2. Followed.

“This guy at college would follow me EVERYWHERE. One day, I just went out to buy my lunch and he came with me. He didn’t buy anything, just followed me. Even when I told him he was making me uncomfortable, he still would not leave me alone. I didn’t wanna sound rude though.

Eventually, I started trying to get on the bus with me when I would head home. That was the last straw for me. The next time He tried to follow me onto the bus, and actually managed to step on, I pushed him off and urgently told the driver to close the doors.

The driver instantly took the hint and shut them. I told him the guy was stalking me, showed my student ID which allowed me on the bus for free, and took a seat.

The next day, the guy had the audacity to ask me why I didn’t let him to home with me. I told him to stop following me around from then on.”

3. DON’T send nudes.

“When she started sending nudes to my work email because I asked her to stop contacting me. I changed my snapchat account and blocked her number, but my work email is on my company’s website, so she found it.

That was a awkward conversation with my IT guys.”

4. Ex-girlfriend.

“When I was stationed in Korea and my ex girlfriend kept emailing my wife from different emails pretending to be women in Korea that I was cheating on her with.

My wife and I had a pretty good laugh about it and she eventually came clean. Her husband was not happy about her still obsessing over me.”

5. At church.

“My husband was deployed in Afghanistan so I had to go to church alone. One week, an older man (maybe 65) approached and said, “Can I sit here?” I said sure. We had a bit of conversation and he said, “My wife died a few weeks ago and I was just praying this morning for God to send an angel I could sit with at church today.” He seemed like a sweetheart, I felt bad for him.

He sat next to me for a few weeks in a row. It didn’t bother me too much. I brought him some homemade jam. He told me about how his son was also deployed.

I mentioned he should really try getting into a church small group, that it would be great company for him. I set him up with one of the best. He said he wasn’t sure how to get to the venue. If he gave me his number, could I tell him where the place was? He was confused. I said, sure.

Well, once I texted him the directions, I don’t think he ever went to the group, but he had my phone number. He started calling 8+ times a day, saying “Hello beautiful” and begging me to meet him at Waffle House.

For the remainder of my husband’s 6-month deployment, I did not go to church. I was really worried about running into that guy. I blocked his number and luckily have never seen him again. Months after my husband got back, I told him what happened and of course he was livid.”

6. Total psycho.

“I broke up with a physically abusive boyfriend, and at the time I worked about a 25 minute drive from where I lived (always drove the same road home).

My schedule never changed and I began seeing his car and occasionally his friends’ cars along my drive, always parked off from the road a little and around some seriously sharp corners. At first I didn’t think anything of it, until it began happening at night (I’d do inventory every Tuesday night and be at work until 10pm; this was my only full night shift).

This went on for about a month, until I started switching my routes to and from work because I was getting creeped out. Easter ended up rolling around and I, again, had to stay late to help my coworker change the signage (I worked at Subway). It was getting close to 9pm, and the work phone began ringing off the hook (was my ex).

My coworker, who knew what was going on, just muted the phone and we continued doing what we needed to do. Shortly after we saw my ex standing outside, in the middle of the road staring into the restaurant.

I hid behind the counter as soon as I could and my coworker ended up telling me when he left. Got calmed down until we got to my car to find out he broke into my car and left a bunch of weed and a threatening note.

I bought a new car the next week; fully equipped with a very loud alarm.”

7. Trying to be friendly.

“As a bus driver you’re expected to be cheerful and chat with whoever while idle. A regular passenger started riding around, always in the front seat. Over a week or two the conversation got quite personal, always by her initiative.

I told my supervisor about this just to cover my ass. Then she started to bring me gifts, cookies, candy beverages. Finally, she invited me over for a meal, so her mom could meet her boyfriend! I had zero interest in the young woman, didn’t want anything to do with her.

Luckily, she moved or just avoided the bus during my shift.”

8. Stalked by Dad.

“When my dad showed up to my place of work.

We had been estranged, but he knew I worked at Starbucks and had traveled from location to location to figure out where I had transferred to and when my shifts were scheduled.

Even had the balls to call the store and pretend to be me to get my schedule information. I saw his vehicle parked out front and freaked out and ran inside.

He followed in after about thirty minutes (right as the morning rush was hitting full swing) and started berating me in front of all my coworkers and customers.

Thats the day I went and learned about restraining orders.”

9. No thanks.

“When he started acting like he couldn’t survive without me directly by his side at all times. I had met him a week earlier, only spoke to him briefly, and never flirted or had any romantic or sexual interactions with him.

He literally just stalked me and physically put himself at my side like a Siamese twin, going as far as pushing other people away from “his” spot, and threatening to kill himself when I brought it up with him. Yeah, no thanks.”

10. That’s kind of scary.

“My sister brought home “my” spiral notebook from school.

She thought it was mine because it had my name written and doodled covering every page.

Turns out it was a girl who was obsessed with me.”

11. Online crazies.

“I was chatting with a gal online through a dating site.

She was nice enough and we were having good conversations, but had not yet even began speaking on the phone. It turns out a friend of hers was friends with one of my friends. Small world.

I’m at home one day puttering around and I hear a knock at my door, I look out the window and see a car I don’t recognize. My hink meter starts pinging so I pull a butcher knife, brace my foot so the door can only open a bit and crack the door.

She is standing there and tells me she got the address from my friend and asking to come in. I was weirded out and declined, she got upset and started crying and telling me how this was supposed to be a pleasant surprise. I tried to send her on her way gently and she got pissed and stormed off and drove away.

I thought that was it. Then she starts emailing me saying she loves me, then starts calling me, (my idiot friend gave her my number), and leaving gifts at my door that would be there in the morning.i lived in Mesa, AZ, she was in Tucson about an hour away. I eventually had to threaten her with a restraining order.

My friend had talked to hers about what was going on she said, “Oh yeah, she’s nuts, she’s done this before.”

I felt a lot better when I left the state.”

12. I WANT YOU BACK.

“Not me but my sister is obsessed with her ex. She cheated on him and is desperate to get him back. She constantly tries to get in touch with him like getting my little brother to FaceTime him through his iPad cause she knows he won’t answer her.

She says she thinks about him every day and will text him on holidays like Easter just to say have a nice day or whatever. They had a conversation and after that she looked up the program he was in at the college he goes to and found out that his program was canceled because of covid19 so she doesn’t understand why he hasn’t gotten in contact with her.

She wrote a letter a couple days ago and is planning to go to his house and leave it at his door. Originally, her plan was to pay me to go ring the doorbell and give it to him but like hell nah lol. Whenever I tell her to back off she just says I don’t understand cause I’ve never been in a relationship:/ it’s been months of crap like this.”

13. Obsessed with the teacher.

“It was really sad.

It was a High School student I was teaching. She found out where I lived and used to conveniently be in the area and then just parked in front of my house. I had to report her. We all met with the principal and a counselor.

She was a senior so we all agreed if she stopped doing that and take another class I wasn’t teaching, we’d let her graduate at the school.”

14. Fatal attraction.

“Had a friend.

She was a bit eccentric, we were really close until she started going totally off the edge – hid my bicycle, stood outside my house screaming obscenities, told everyone we had a sexual relationship, belittled my abusive past, screaming right into my face.

Tried to stab our common friend… Twice. The thing that pulled alarms in my head was when i told her I’ll be heading home from my boyfriends soon and she can come for a visit in a couple of hours if she wants.

Got home in under an hour, she was waiting near my apartment building and started accusing me of lying to her, there was absolutely no telling her that I wanted to settle a little, take a shower and eat something, I did not say I’d be home in two hours. I managed to cut her out of my life.

Few years later she started blowing up my mothers phone (one cant find my number anywhere) demanding for her to give my number explaining all this pretty lunatic nonsense, but how she needed me because I’m one of her apostles and she needs me to start her own religion, because she is “his son, another of Adam and Eve”, and this was not even the craziest shit.

Quite confidental seeing that a few years before this she was super paranoid about my mother since she works for the military. And yes, previously this girl had a delusion that she is re-incarnated Jesus.

After this I’ve heard through friends that I’m Peter, Venus and latest probably was that I’m a whore. So yeah that was the point I was more than sure she was obsessed with me.”

15. That’s wild.

“She went to my grandmother’s house and got my phone number from beside the phone on the little board in the kitchen…

…5 years after we dated and I had severed all ties with her and anyone that still associated with her.”

Yikes…be careful out there, everyone.

Have you ever had someone develop an unhealthy obsession with you? Or maybe someone even started stalking you at some point?

If so, please share your stories with us in the comments!

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People Talk About What They Thought Was Really Expensive or Cheap When They Were Kids

When I was young, there was a family in our small town and they drove a convertible…

And I thought they were THE SHIT.

Who actually OWNS a convertible, I used to think to myself. I believed they lived in a mansion, went to country clubs, and probably had maids and butlers.

Looking back on it years later, I think it was actually kind of a middle-of-the-road car (I can’t remember what kind, exactly). The point is that when you’re a kid, you have little or no concept of money and what things really cost.

But it always makes for hilarious stories later on!

Let’s dig into some stories from folks on AskReddit.

1. The good stuff.

“Always had sparkling grape juice as kids but only for New Years.

Seemed like such a lavish bottle. They’re cheap as hell… but only having it that often made it feel so special.”

2. She loves it!

“It never occurred to me that some food was more expensive than other food. I 100% thought my mom made spaghetti all the time because it was her favorite.

I was much older when I realized it was because it would feed a lot of people very cheap.”

3. Three flavors.

“I always thought Neopolitan ice cream must’ve been the apex of ice cream decadence and expense because you got not 1, not 2, but THREE flavors in one tub!”

4. Well, it turns out…

“Food colouring and fondant icing for baking. Thought it was sooo expensive and that’s why only fancy cakes used them.

Turns out they cost like £1 each.”

5. A painful lesson.

“The dentist.

Didn’t think I’d be in debt from getting teeth fixed.

My husband and I are having to take turns with the dentist this year. He needs more work so I’m going to let him go first once things open up, because we can’t afford for us both to go.

Luckily I just a need a few fillings, he needs a root can*l and a crown.

He had a bunch of work done last year too. I don’t even know why we have dental insurance if it covers so little.”

6. Costs a fortune.

“Disneyland.

Honestly I didn’t really have a guess on how much a ticket was but we got to go every couple of years so I figured it was no big deal.”

7. Getting fancy.

“Going out to anything other than fast food was an expensive night out.

Even Applebees.”

8. You must be loaded.

“Disney movies.

I grew up poor and my dad would always get the forgettable off brand versions of popular cartoon movies. Instead of The Hunchback of Notre Dame, for example, I’d get to see The Secret of the Hunchback. Lots and lots of that.

When I saw a kid who owned a REAL Disney movie on VHS I assumed they were very rich. I didn’t realize you could buy several in one month and not have to declare bankruptcy even without being rich.”

9. It adds up.

“Curtains.

Never thought of them being valuable.

Guess what, if you have someone make them fit your place they cost a fortune.”

10. Don’t throw those away.

“Those self-stick bows you put on gifts.

I used to think they were super expensive because everyone in my family used them over and over. We had a few that we used so much, they were recognizable. We had a few “fancy” ones. Wrapping paper too!

Based on how careful my family was about not tearing it and how my grandmother would fold it, I figured it must be really expensive…yeah, both are super cheap.”

11. Everybody’s doing it.

“College.

My oldest brother and all his friends went to college, never mentioning the expense.

As a kid, I thought it must be cheap because “all the guys are doing it.””

12. We’re staying in tonight…

“Going out to eat.

I think I thought it cost like $10-20 or something. I never understood why we didn’t go to more restaurants when I was a kid. Thought my mom was just cheap.

Turns out feeding a family of five at mediocre restaurant can easily cost over $100.00 if people get drinks, appetizers, and dessert.”

13. My life is over!

“I stood on our toilet seat and broke it when I was around 10. I was so upset thinking that it was the biggest mistake of my life and would cost my parents so much money.

I replaced my toilet seat last week and it cost me $6.”

14. Only for the very wealthy…

“Balloons.

Such an extravagance! Once a year only, for your birthday party – and even then you get just one each. Be careful, don’t pop it!

I prized that thing – it provided entertainment for days.

You can buy 100 for a fiver.”

15. Moms do that kind of stuff.

“Always thought clothing was cheap.

Wasn’t until I was in college that I realized I always had new clothing because my mom never bought anything for herself for life 15 years.”

16. That’s all I’ll need!

“Ten dollars is a lot of money for a kid.

I thought I could run off to California, pay for the flight, food, and downpayment for a celebrity mansion with ten dollars.”

I don’t know why, but I got a HUGE kick out of those responses.

Now it’s your turn!

In the comments, please share the things that you wrongly thought were really expensive or really cheap when you were a kid!

We look forward to hearing from you!

The post People Talk About What They Thought Was Really Expensive or Cheap When They Were Kids appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Offer Tips to Those Who’ve Never Been in a Fight Before

The older you get, the more you realize that fighting is very serious.

What seemed kind of harmless when you’re younger really becomes dangerous and potentially life-altering as you keep aging.

You should always avoid a fight whenever possible, but there are some instances in life when you have to defend yourself.

And you should be prepared, just in case.

Here are some fighting tips from folks on AskReddit.

1. If you have to…

“If you absolutely can’t run, take them out by any means necessary.

No such thing as a fair fight when your health and safety are on the line.”

2. Keep moving.

“Make sure to move away from a punch.

You don’t need to dodge a punch, you just need to make sure you’re dampening the impact as much as possible.

Notice in combat sports that they never move into a strike.”

3. At least look ready.

“Be ready if you can, at least look ready, that may discourage a would-be opponent.

Talk your way out of it if you can. Let’s face it; you’re probably in a situation that will not be improved by violence.

If all that fails, Theodore Roosevelt said: “The unforgivable crime is soft hitting. Do not hit at all if it can be avoided; but never hit softly.””

4. Some tips.

“Elbows in, hands eyebrow level, chin down.

Throw mostly straight punches to the nose. “

5. Don’t drop your guard.

“Always keep your guard up!

This is one thing you see a lot of beginners do: throw a punch and then drop the guard. Don‘t expect that you can evade like some of the pros do by dropping their guard to provoke their opponent into a mistake.

This takes years of trained reaction and still fails them too.

Also, street fights can be quite scary even if you‘re trained. There are no rules, there is no ref, there is most likely no one stopping your opponent from going too far or using dirty tricks. That‘s no joke and a horrible situation to be stuck in. First rule is always: avoid the fight if possible.

If your opponent pulls a knife, distract (throw sth for example) and run! Don‘t try to disarm your opponent like in some of those idiotic YT videos – this works in those showcases, usually doesn‘t work in a real fight. A hand with a knife is a lot faster and flexible than you’d probably think. You‘ll end up heavily injured or dead.”

6. Fighting dirty.

“If in closer combat, and you aren’t mentally prepared to fight “dirty” (as in, gouging eyes, ripping ears, biting, etc.), use elbows.

Elbows, with the right velocity (swept across your body like a blade) can be absolutely devastating for close combat.

More effective if you have your other hand on the other side of their head.”

7. From an MMA fighter.

“I train MMA, here’s my advice.

Don’t get in a fight;

Always cover the temples & keep your jaw clenched shut.”

8. All in.

“Go all in.

If you’re not committed to do the most damage there’s a good chance you’ll get your ass whipped.”

9. A lot of advice.

“It’s easier to use the heel of your palm. Don’t throw a punch unless you have experience. Aim for the bridge of the nose. Maintain eye contact with the nose bridge, and don’t turn your head upward or to the side when they start throwing punches back.

Everyone turns their head because they don’t want to get hit in the face, but if you’re in a fight you don’t get the luxury. Maintain eye contact with where you want you throw your palm or punch.

Expect it to be mostly grappling. Hand-to-hand isn’t really a thing, despite what you see on tv and social media. Get ready to get on the ground, because that’s probably where you’re both going.

Don’t let them get behind you. The second anyone gets their arms around you they’re gonna try and snake their way to your back. Don’t let that happen, because their next step is probably a rear-naked choke, and those are impossible for regular people to escape. Unless you have forearms the size of tree-trunks, the fight is over once you’re in a rear-naked.

Don’t fight dirty unless you’re prepared to receive that back. For example: most guys never go for the balls, because that shit is excruciating and incapacitating. But the second you throw a knee to his balls, the “no balls” rule is off the table and your balls are fair game.

No big windups. Throw punches or palm strikes straight. Avoid hay makers and the such. And don’t hook to the face unless you know you have an opening. Be okay with the idea of not throwing any hooks, because there probably won’t be a chance.

Severely underrated moves include: fast gut punches and consecutive hard kicks to the legs (right above the knee). Most street fights won’t have these moves because amateurs mostly only go for face hits and rear-naked chokes, but professionals will tell you they are essential moves that are just as important.

Get out as soon as possible. The second it’s safe, turn heel and bolt. Why? Because fights aren’t worth it unless you’re getting paid. And the longer you’re there, the lower your chances are of getting out in one piece. Additionally, you’ll never lose a fight if you always end it on your own terms. I’m undefeated.

Does that means I’ve won every fight I’ve ever been in? That’s not the point. I’ve never been knocked out, I’ve never gone to jail, I’ve never had to go the hospital, and my face is still as beautiful as it’s always been. Some things are more important than pride. Prioritize.”

10. Fancy footwork.

“Footwork is important, stand so that a punch won’t knock you over.

Don’t lean into a punch. Also know what advantage you have over your opponent. If he’s bigger than you, try to move to the side or behind him, movings harder for him so make him move.

If he’s taller, get in close so his reach advantage is taken away.”

11. No chivalry.

“If you can’t avoid the fight, choose soft ground, if possible.

Fight to win. There’s no chivalry in a fight. Keep your head.”

12. Use those legs.

“People forget that they have legs a lot in fights, they also forget that there is more to do with them than just kicking people.

If you grapple someone else calve by wrapping a leg around it and twist your hips you can easily bring them down into groundwork which is always advantageous for the defender.”

13. Do what you gotta do.

“Your targets are eyes, throat, crotch, feet, in that order. Your goal isn’t to win, it’s to run away and stay alive.

Don’t fight like in the movies; scratch and bite and scream and shove them away and then run like hell.”

14. An interesting perspective.

“When shit is about to break loose, start undressing and get naked.

It is important to demonstrate the opponent that you are utterly insane and will use that during a potential murder trial.”

15. Run for it.

“I have years of experience in boxing and Muay Thai.

My best tip is: Run!

Street fights aren’t a sport where people follow the rules.

Even an experienced fighter can end up with a knife in his stomach or a brick in his neck.

Just run.”

Hopefully, most people will never have to use any of those tips in their lives…

Now we want to hear from you,

If you have any further advice in this department, please share it with us in the comments.

The post People Offer Tips to Those Who’ve Never Been in a Fight Before appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Share Questions They Really Don’t Like to Be Asked

Everyone has questions they don’t like to be asked.

I started getting gray hair at a pretty young age and when people asked me about it out in public or at work I would just die a little bit inside.

I still don’t love it when someone asks me about it, but it doesn’t bother me so much anymore.

What is the one question that you really hate being asked?

Let’s see what AskReddit users had to say.

1. Talk!

“Why are you not talking?

I am an introvert and i HATE this question. Specially when they ask that in front of a whole crowd.”

2. Not a fan of this one either.

“Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?

I’m betting in 2015 nobody had this shit right.”

3. I’m pretty sure…

“Are you sure [my slightly unusual last name] is pronounced like that?

Yes, I’m sure.”

4. Ugh. No.

“What words would you use to describe yourself?”

5. Never ask unless you’re sure.

“When are you due?

(I’m not pregnant).”

6. I can’t think of any.

“What 3 fun facts can you tell the class about yourself?”

Getting asked this every year in school drives me crazy.”

7. So rude.

“‘Are you Chinese?’

NOOOOOOOOOO.

Or how about “What are you?”

8. To each their own.

“How can you listen to that?

That’s not music.”

9. The scourge of all tall people.

“How tall are you?

Do you play basketball?”

10. No freebies.

“I trained as an opera singer and whenever I say that I immediately get asked to sing at their wedding/christening/uncle’s funeral/neighbour’s sister’s son’s bar mitzvah.

For free.

That or if I’m going to audition for Britain’s Got Talent.”

11. NEVER.

“When are you going to start having kids?”

12. Because I don’t like anyone?

“Why are you single?

I hate how people ask this question as if it’s normal to them for people to be attracted to them all the time so they can just choose whenever they feel like not being single.”

13. Only children.

“I’m an only child. I’ve had many, many people ask me what it was like being spoiled rotten as a kid and given anything I wanted.

Wait? What?

All because it was just me doesn’t mean I was just given anything I ever wanted.”

14. Don’t ask.

“What’s wrong with her?

Why do you put her in the wheelchair?

What caused that?

Did you know about this before the birth?

My child is disabled.”

15. I’d rather not.

“Can you tell me about yourself?”

I hate that question in personal conversations and in job interviews.

I hate talking about myself and it’s such a broad question that I never know what to say and always think I’m giving a bad answer.”

16. Getting old…

“Are you a natural red head?

I am a natural redhead and I get asked all the time. Don’t know how people can’t tell by my pale skin and freckles.”

17. That’s not the reason.

“I have naturally shaky hands and work at a coffee shop. So I get asked if I’ve had to much caffeine all the time.

It gets very annoying.”

18. That’s very weird.

““Do you and your twin share boyfriends?”

No.

She’s married to a man and I’m a lesbian.”

19. Not everyone does it.

“Why don’t you drink?

Because mind your own business, that’s why. Because my answer is depressing, a real conversation-killer.

Because I don’t feel like explaining to my boss why I’m a teetotaler when I decline to drink at out-of-office social functions.”

20. Listen up…

“Wow youre left-handed?

How can you write like that?

The same way you do dipshit, just the other hand.”

21. Brilliant.

“When you lost something:

“Well, where did you lose it?””

22. Not okay.

“This will sound strange but I hate it when someone asks me if I’m okay whilst I’m clearly about to cry.

If they didn’t say anything i can pull myself together but as soon as they ask if I’m okay i cry my eyes out immediately.

Any one else do that?”

23. Bring on the anxiety.

“What do you want to do after you graduate?”

I honestly have no idea and it fills me with anxiety and if one more person ask me about it I’m gonna burst into tears.”

24. Jeez…

“Wow you have a ton of siblings! Do you all have the same dad?”

Why would you ask something so personal and rude to anyone, let alone somebody you barely know?

How would this info benefit you??”

25. Ummmm, no.

“Do you think it’s something you did?”

I am a parent to 4 autistic children.”

26. This is THE adult question.

“How’s school?”

That’s all ANY adult wants to ask me.

It’s the same as it was yesterday when you asked. It’s fucking shitty and I’m always tired.”

27. Major facepalm.

“I have gay parents.

“Wait then…. how were you born??””

28. Tell me about all of them.

“What do your tattoos mean?”

Uh well my full sleeve of flowers means I uhh like flowers…”

29. It’s a job.

“As a professional photographer, “Why do you charge so much for photos?”

It’s my livelihood .”

30. Never a good thing.

“How’s the job search going?”

Thankfully I’m employed now so I don’t get this, by my GOD this was the worst. I already had so much anxiety and self-loathing when I was unemployed after uni, and for some reason the second someone finds out you don’t have a job it’s all they want to talk about with you.

If you know someone is still unemployed then clearly it’s not going as well as they’d hoped so why even ask?! I can understand asking once and that most of the time they mean well, but to constantly bring it up every time you see them is ridiculous.”

31. Common sense isn’t common.

“What’s combat like?

Like seriously maybe have enough common sense to know that is something veterans don’t just talk about.”

32. Never anything good after this.

“Can I ask you a question?”

33. The twin curse.

“Which twin is the smart one?

As an identical twin, I just hate being compared so much.”

Okay, now we want to hear from all the readers out there.

In the comments, tell us the question that YOU hate to be asked.

Please and thank you!

The post People Share Questions They Really Don’t Like to Be Asked appeared first on UberFacts.

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Posts About English That Will Confuse Even People Who Speak It

English is a hard language for non-native speakers to learn, and if you don’t believe me, consider how poorly a vast majority of native English speakers understand their own language.

There are as many ways to break rules as there are rules, and really, most of them are arbitrary and make little sense to begin with.

Need some examples? Here are 12 that will twist your mind into knots.

12. Why are there so many ways to spell Sean, though?

And don’t even get me started on Seamus.

Image Credit: Twitter

11. This is a good jumping off point.

It kind of makes you feel better about all the rest of it.

https://questlon.tumblr.com/post/58561680948/rules-to-learning-english

10. We’re blowing your mind.

And also infuriating you at the same time.

https://libbylumos.tumblr.com/post/88380256963/ironically-on-fire-dajo42-laid-is-pronounced

9. There’s literally no rhyme or reason.

See what I did there?

Image Credit: Tumblr

8. Go ahead and just ruminate on that for a minute.

But not longer, unless you want to get angry.

7. I’m going to pronounce ‘naked’ like ‘baked’ and vice versa from now on.

I’m sure that won’t cause any confusion.

Image Credit: Twitter

6. At least you can’t mix them up.

Just pick one. You can’t go wrong!

The phrases "you’re shit" and "you ain’t shit" mean the same thing from Showerthoughts

5. Non-English speakers have no idea what’s going on here.

And honestly, I’m kind of jealous.

Image Credit: Twitter

4. It makes us all really uncomfortable.

That’s why English does it, of course.

https://sadspaghetti.tumblr.com/post/118042757758/it-makes-me-really-uncomfortable-that-the-word

3. And it just keeps going on and on my friend.

We could do this all day.

https://egberts.tumblr.com/post/75775212529

2. The American South does have the market cornered on contractions.

The really really fun kind.

Image credit: Tumblr

1. Do you think English made this pun on purpose?

Or was it a happy accident?

https://death-limes.tumblr.com/post/112073687148/just-shower-thoughts-if-womb-is-pronounced

 

I need a drink, you guys.

Which English nonsense rule is your most/least favorite? Tell us in the comments!

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