People Shared Their Injuries That Are Just Too Dumb

Our bodies are just plain weird.

I mean on the one hand they’re these fascinatingly complex machines forged by eons of adaptation and struggle and death and trial and error, and on the other hand if you look at them weird they kinda fall apart.

That’s the lesson that many people on Twitter are learning.

Oh but it gets worse. Here are some more examples.

14. Bunt it

I think it’s safe to say you’re out.

13. Bemused

Yeah that sounds about right.

12. Hot times

This kid is going places. I don’t know where, but places.

11. Way up high

This is like some absolutely horrific version of slapstick.

10. What are ya, chicken?

Seems like you should just stay away from animals forever.

9. The blackout

At least you were around a nurse?

8. The wall

You’re gonna have to back up a minute and walk me through this.

7. A delicate balance

This hurts so much to read.

6. So romantic

The things that young men think women will be impressed by for some reason never cease to amaze me.

5. Just to be safe

Don’t do drugs, kids.

4. Back to basics

Totally worth it though.

3. Sock it to me

Ageing is a lot of fun.

2. Headfirst

You really gotta brace yourself.

1. Hippo impressions

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, kids are dangerous.

I need to go put on some bandages. Just in case.

What’s your dumbest injury?

Tell us the tale in the comments.

The post People Shared Their Injuries That Are Just Too Dumb appeared first on UberFacts.

People Talk About the Worst Pain They’ve Ever Felt

The older I get, the more I hope I don’t suffer any major injuries.

It’s one thing to get hurt when you’re a kid because you know you’ll bounce right back but when you start getting up there in years, it can get pretty dicey and recovery takes much longer.

I think the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my life was when I broke my hand when I was 12…and I hope it stays that way…

What’s the worst pain you’ve ever felt?

Here’s what folks had to say on AskReddit.

1. Ugh.

“I rolled my foot in a hole (like it made a loud snap) in my driveway and tore my Achilles.

I did a front flip tumble onto the ground, and couldn’t get up. 10/10 worst pain.”

2. It’s not you, it’s me.

“A cluster headache I had once after s*x, like right after.

Put a real dampener on the whole thing and it’s hard to convince a person that the reason you’re up out of bed straight after, groaning in pain and vomiting into the sink, isn’t some kind of personal judgement on them.”

3. Yeah, those hurt.

“I’ve broken a fair amount of bones, including my jaw.

But a kidney stone is the worst pain I’ve ever felt.”

4. Ouch!

“I dislocated my elbow when I was 16 and I wasn’t allowed to have any water or painkillers before they put me under to re set it.

Unfortunately for me, the had to do x rays before hand. This meant moving the dislocated joint into multiple positions for different x rays, none of which were natural.”

5. Those are bad.

“Dry socket after wisdom teeth removal.

Painkillers didn’t help, couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat.

Absolutely agonizing.

Hurt worse than breaking my kneecap (which definitely comes in second).”

6. Like a knife.

“Pinched nerves from a broken back

. The best description I can come up with is it was like having a white hot knife blade pulled straight from the forge and plunged into my back.

Pain meds did absolutely nothing to stop it.”

7. Rough stuff.

“UTIs are so awful.

From the first twinge, you know you’re in for hours and hours of pain. Primarily a constant, burning need to urinate. Instead, when you go, it actually going doesn’t bring relief and instead feels like you’re trying to pass razor blades.

I also get very sweaty and tend to vomit.”

8. Painful.

“An abdominal infection from a surgery complications

Had a narcissist stepdad who refused to take me to the doctor. Said I wasn’t taking enough pain medication even though I was bedridden for nearly 8 days and I was supposed to be more or less better by the 3rd. It wasn’t until it was just in unimaginable pain and a high grade fever. So I decided to just start howling and crying so he’d have to take me to the ER.

I had to have a second surgery and a drainage bulb put in because the infection had created a wicked abscess.”

9. Treatment.

“Cancer treatment.

I’ve had needles shoved into my spinal column that made my balls feel like they were in a vice, I’ve had severe vomiting, I’ve had severe mouth rot from mucositis caused by methotrexate that was so painful I couldn’t swallow anything even when taking maximum recommended dosage of oxycodone to the point I hadn’t drank water in 2 days.

I’ve had a fissure in my intestines that made me pass out from the pain while using the bathroom, I had such severe chemo brain I couldn’t comprehend the news, so I had to watch kids cartoons, I forgot how to walk properly for a month.

I had forceful intubation that damaged my vocal chords so severely I wasn’t able to talk for 2 months, and I still have coughing fits from some scar tissue moving around, which is hella inconvenient when you’re out in public and have to explain you ain’t sick, your throat’s just f*cked up.”

10. No way!

“One time I was running my hand along a rough wooden railing on a bridge and turned it at just the wrong angle to catch a massive splinter under my fingernail.

It broke off so the entire thing was lodged underneath all the way back to the nail bed, and there was no part sticking out to grab with tweezers.

I ended up going to the ER and getting surgery to cut my nail open and remove it.”

11. Needles.

“Having blood taken from a vein in my foot

Worse than childbirth.”

12. Ear problems.

“Very severe ear infection.

Felt like my head was gonna explode! My ear had swelled up so bad I couldn’t hear, and the medicine drops wouldn’t go down, had to get the fluid sucked out of my ear and a wick put in. Instantly felt better after.

I’ve been prone since a child to get ear infections but interestingly enough I haven’t had an ear infection since that really bad one.”

13. Sounds absolutely awful.

“Shoulder surgery.

The nerve block they gave me lasted nearly 12 hours after surgery was done. I woke up in the middle of the night drenched in my own tears and felt the most intense, stabbing pain where the anaesthetic had worn off.

Felt like there was a fire in my shoulder.”

14. Terrible.

“Randomly assaulted 8 years ago, got kicked and stomped in the head 6-7 times (rest of the body got worked on as well), massive concussion, three damaged vertebrae (two in the neck one in the back), pinched/jammed nerves and blood vessels all over the back/spine region.

Busted teeth, eyes knocked out, off synch, left arm down to approximately 40% functionality. Lots of stitches.

Took me two years to just be able to sit and have dinner with my parents and not feel like keeling over from nausea due to pain and discomfort.

I’d say I’m 85-90% or so recovered now, concussion is still active, I wouldn’t wish that long never ending pain on anyone.”

How about you?

What’s the worst pain you’ve ever felt in your life?

Tell us all about it in the comments!

The post People Talk About the Worst Pain They’ve Ever Felt appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share the Most Ridiculous Ways They’ve Ever Been Injured

I broke my hand once…punching my brother in the head.

Idiot!

I know, I know…I was young and we were fighting and I shouldn’t have done it but, you live and you learn, right? And then I was in a cast for six weeks…

Oops!

Let’s hear from folks on AskReddit who admitted the dumbest ways they’ve ever been injured.

1. Ouch!

“My brother had a turtle. He would take it out of its pen from time to time and let it roam the yard. I watched it chomp on some grass.

I picked it up and was feeding it grass, amazed at how clean it chopped the grass. So I stuck my finger in its mouth.

Turn out it hurts really bad. I didn’t want to hurt the guy so I had to suffer through it until he let go. He pulled his head into his shell so I couldn’t pull my finger out.

Finally he let go.

Long story short don’t stick your fingies where you wouldn’t stick your dingie.”

2. That sounds painful.

“I closed the trunk door of my car on my nose.

Still wondering how i managed to do that…”

3. A memorable first kiss.

“I once kissed a reflection of myself on the outside of a metal toaster while in use, and seriously burned my lips.

Technically my first kiss…”

4. Yowza!

“I put on a Tigger costume when I was little and thought I could bounce on his tail jumped off my dresser & broke my tailbone.”

5. Pyromania.

“Powdered Draino, shredded aluminum foil, rubbing alcohol, and a match.

Set my 12-year-old head on fire.”

6. That’s embarrassing.

“A few years ago I woke up, when to the bathroom, and was wiping my *ss when I pull my neck. Still not sure how but it happened I just felt the pull and had an enormous pain.

Went to the doctor who gave me anti-inflammatory injections and had to use a collar for a week and I used to tell people I fell.”

7. A bad idea.

“When I was like 10 years, I found a box cutter in a drawer and wanted to see how sharp it was. I decided the best way to do that was to cut across the palm of my hand.

It was sharp… I don’t remember how painful it was but I remember staring at my hand for a few seconds before the blood started to pour out.”

8. Don’t mess around with those.

“I had never seen a lacrosse ball. Didn’t realize It was so bouncy and heavy.

Threw it at the ground at my feet. It bounced up and hit me right in the nostrils.

Blood everywhere and a new found respect for the bouncy ball of death.”

9. Ugh. Brutal.

“Getting ran over by a thousand pounds of water jugs on a pallet while working a couple years ago.

It took my toe nail off but didn’t break the bone.”

10. Don’t get into bar fights.

“Got into a bar fight because a friend of a friend called someone else “gay” in an argument over the jukebox, then ended up getting hit with the pool cue they’d taken from the friend.

Had to be told later why I’d been suckered, and that one of the guys had flashed a pistol. Ended up getting a girlfriend out of it, but then we broke up and she had some other guy’s kid.

Ten years later we hooked up again, and I married her and now I’m divorced, so really the whole story is just bad from start to end.”

11. I am so sorry.

“Was sitting on the floor hammering a nail into something, lost grip then the hammer bounced out of my hand and landed on my d*ck.”

12. Sneezing can be dangerous.

“Sneezed so hard that something between my shoulder and neck popped.

Couldn’t turn my head properly for 2 weeks because of the sharp pain, as if someone stuck a giant needle in there and pushed really hard.”

13. The foam pit of death.

“I was at a trampoline park in Arkansas and was 3 months before my 14th birthday.

I tried to do a backflip into the foam pit and nearly killed myself.

My back still hurts now, 6 years later.”

14. Hahahaha. Wow.

“I threw my back out and had to use a cane for two weeks because I was clipping my toenails.”

15. You are NOT Bruce Lee.

“Swinging nunchucks too fast.

Busted my face wide open at 1 am.”

16. Life imitating art.

“When I was in high school I saw A Christmas story for the first time. In the scene the boy gets his tongue stuck to a metal pole out in the snow. I didn’t know that was a real thing so I wanted to test it out for myself.

I put a spoon in the freezer and then when it was frozen stuck my tongue on it. Hurt like a b*tch getting it off.”

Ouch!

Now we want to hear from you!

In the comments, tell us about the dumbest way you’ve ever injured yourself.

We can’t wait to hear your stories!

The post People Share the Most Ridiculous Ways They’ve Ever Been Injured appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share the Stupidest Ways They’ve Injured Themselves

We’ve all injured ourselves in pretty dumb ways at one point or another in our lives. Okay, it’s confession time: when I was 12, I broke my hand…punching my brother in the head. Let’s just say my parents were not thrilled.

I still haven’t lived that one down.

AskReddit users opened up and shared the dumbest ways they’ve ever been injured.

1. The grape incident.

“Threw a grape in the air to catch it in my mouth.

It fell on the floor and I bent down to pick it up and smashed my face into the window sill.”

2. Shower disaster.

“Showering at a hotel in a small stall with a slippery tile floor. Bent over to wash my feet, my butt hit the tap handle. I slipped, put my hands out to save myself and violently slammed the glass shower door open. I bashed my forehead and bridge of nose on the tile floor, had a major nose bleed and a giant goose egg on my forehead.

I don’t have bangs to cover that up. I thought I had escaped without the black eyes I expected after bashing my nose, but 2 days later I woke up with deep purple swollen eyelids. Luckily I had packed my seldom used makeup to cover the worst of it and I wore a hat in the day time. I’m still shocked the shower door didn’t shatter when it hit the wall.”

3. Ouch! That’s not good.

“I was in the 4th or 5th grade but I jumped down an entire flight of stairs.

Landed hard and hurt my foot. Walked on it for a day or two afterwards turned out I shattered my heel and broke my ankle.”

4. That is brutal.

“Tripped over a storage ottoman trying to jump over it all slick.

Got my toes wedged in the latch and broke my foot in 2 places.”

5. Time to tape the toes together.

“I live in Minnesota so I am used to kicking snow off my boots by slamming my toe part of the boot down on the ground.

Well, it was summer and I happened to get my running shoes absolutely covered in mud, so I instinctively slammed my toes down on the pavement and broke my toes.”

6. Right into the shin.

“Stabbed myself in the leg with a piece of metal.

It was really thin and tapered at the tip so when you swung it you would hear this really cool “Whoosh” sound.

I swung down way to hard and it went right into my shin. Bad times.”

7. That is odd.

“I got out of a long, hot shower and noticed a thread dangling off of my shirt, and when I tried to pull it out it just neatly sliced through several millimeters of my finger.

It was so minor I can hardly even call it an injury, but getting cut by a shirt is definitely the stupidest I’ve had.”

8. Funny but painful.

“Was helping husband replace the bathroom fan, so I was standing on the side of the bathtub.

I had this plastic hook glued to the shower wall to hang a loofa on. I went to get down and slid down the wall and hooked my butt cheek to the wall.

It hurt so bad but was also hilarious. I’m in my 40s and this happened recently.”

9. Getting old is no fun.

“I dropped something behind my couch, leaned over the back to pick it up and cracked a rib.

Was in pain for a week. Getting old is hell.”

10. Could’ve been worse.

“To try to get a cheap laugh out of my ex, I threw a hammer as hard as I could at a tree.

The hammer bounced off the tree, and I turned just in time for it to hit me in the small of my back.

Miracle I’m not paralyzed.”

11. An epic tale.

“When I was a kid, maybe 10 or so, I had recently discovered that the feet on my prosthetics could be unscrewed and moved into different positions, so I “borrowed” and Allen key from my dad and took it to school so I could unscrew my feet and show my friends at recess…non of them were as blown away by this as I’d hoped, pretty sure they were just used to this kind of thing by now haha.

Anyway, the bell went to tell us to go back to class and I very quickly tightened the feet back onto the prosthetics, put my shoes back on and started making my way back to class. As I was walking with a group of my classmates I started to notice my legs felt wobbly. I looked down and with every step my feet were turning outwards slightly. A normal person would have come to the conclusion “oh, I didn’t tighten the screws up enough”.

But not me, I jumped to the conclusion of “HOLY SHIT I CAN CONTROL MY FEET LIKE A ROBOT”. My excitement quickly turned to dread when I realised I don’t know how to control feet (been an amputee since I was a baby) and they kept turning until one was pointing sideways. Despite this I kept trying to walk and after a few more steps the foot just fell off and I managed to slam the now footless prosthetic down, which jarred my knee and hips and caused me to slip over and face plant into the corner of a cement mini wall (one of those waist high walls).

Being a self respecting 10yo I started bawling my eyes out, which caught the attention of the new teacher. It’s her first day and the only disabled student is in pieces, (the foot got thrown backwards when it fell off) with a bloodied nose, screaming like a banshee. She didn’t really know what to do since I couldn’t get back up, so she gave me some tissues for my nose and made a very confused call to the maintenance man asking if he knows how to fix prosthetics so I can get to the school nurse.”

12. That is messed up.

“Walked onto a manhole cover that was not placed on correctly.

Ended up in the hospital and had to to have 3 surgeries over 4 months.”

13. Not a good idea.

“My friend saw a jellyfish on the beach then kicked it. Like on purpose and knowing what it was.

They had to go to the ER.”

14. Watch out!

“Riding my bike home in 5th grade slowly alongside my walking friends.

Friend : Drew look where you’re going

Drew : naw dude I’m good at biking I can do it with my eyes closed

Friend : no really dude, look out

Drew : naw man, I’m good

Instantly crashes into a parked car, mess up my bike chain, have to drag my bike home in shame and explain to my mom why my knee and lip are bleeding.”

15. Walking from now on.

“Thought I could walk my dog on a leash while riding my bike. Dog saw a squirrel and yanked me off my bike. I broke a few bones in my hand.

Doc was like “what did you expect would happen?” “

16. Undone by a paper bag.

“Bending over to pick up a paper bag. A completely empty paper grocery store bag. It was standing upright, not even laying on the floor. I barely had to even bend down to pick it up.

Somehow this triggered a cosmic alignment between two vertebrae and nerve cluster because suddenly I fell to the floor in crippling pain, could not get my back straight and had to crawl to the living room so I could lay on the carpeted floor and try to stretch it out. I ended up fucked up like this for days and had to have physical therapy to slowly work out the pinched nerve. I was basically walking like Quasimodo for a couple weeks.

People would assume I was in an accident or lifting some boulder like Hercules or saving a child pinned under a car. But nope. I was undone by an empty paper bag.”

17. This person is definitely accident-prone.

“Wow, so many options.

Most recent. Working under my truck on a slight slope while on a creeper. Grabbed the undercarriage and yanked hard to slide to the back, forgot about slope and used excessive force. I probably would have wound up in the street, had all 250lbs of me not been decelerated by the top of my head hitting the differential. Woke up and it was darker and my neck was sore. I also had a horn like a unicorn (big lump). 2 weeks on concussion watch and wearing a hat to conceal the lump.

Most memorable. 8yo me finds a weird blue light bulb in the creek. Has what looks like mica inclusions in the glass and steel wool instead of a filament. 8yo me goes into the closet with a 9v battery and 2 wires to find out what it looks like lit. I hold it between index and middle finger and apply the wires. Eureka! Like a flash I realize. It’s a flash bulb. I am now blind, in a closet, 2 fingers melted to a hot flash bulb. Keystone Kops antics ensue.

Strangest. Talking to my sister on the landline in the kitchen. I have raccoon hands, always touching things, picking things up, etc while talking. At one point I wind up with a peanut butter cookie and an open flame. Even I don’t know how I got there, lol. Peanut butter cookie winds up on fire. I try to throw it into the sink, miss badly, cookie breaks up and flaming pieces fall on my bare feet. I learn there are a LOT of nerve endings on top of my feet. Screaming somehow communicates problem to sister, who I can hear laughing on the dropped handset.

Bonus. Forgot the cookie lesson regarding nerve endings. Barbecuing in a Weber kettle. In flip flops. I spread out the pile of briquettes once they were ready. Bottom vents were open and hot embers fell on my feet. Poured beer on my feet and increased the vocabulary of nearby children.”

18. Please don’t ever do that again.

“I was separating my eyelashes (because mascara) with a safety pin.

Stabbed myself in the eyeball.”

Wow. Those are pretty…dumb.

How about you? What’s the stupidest way you’ve ever injured yourself?

Don’t be shy! Tell us in the comments!

The post People Share the Stupidest Ways They’ve Injured Themselves appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share the Stupidest Ways They’ve Injured Themselves

We’ve all injured ourselves in pretty dumb ways at one point or another in our lives. Okay, it’s confession time: when I was 12, I broke my hand…punching my brother in the head. Let’s just say my parents were not thrilled.

I still haven’t lived that one down.

AskReddit users opened up and shared the dumbest ways they’ve ever been injured.

1. The grape incident.

“Threw a grape in the air to catch it in my mouth.

It fell on the floor and I bent down to pick it up and smashed my face into the window sill.”

2. Shower disaster.

“Showering at a hotel in a small stall with a slippery tile floor. Bent over to wash my feet, my butt hit the tap handle. I slipped, put my hands out to save myself and violently slammed the glass shower door open. I bashed my forehead and bridge of nose on the tile floor, had a major nose bleed and a giant goose egg on my forehead.

I don’t have bangs to cover that up. I thought I had escaped without the black eyes I expected after bashing my nose, but 2 days later I woke up with deep purple swollen eyelids. Luckily I had packed my seldom used makeup to cover the worst of it and I wore a hat in the day time. I’m still shocked the shower door didn’t shatter when it hit the wall.”

3. Ouch! That’s not good.

“I was in the 4th or 5th grade but I jumped down an entire flight of stairs.

Landed hard and hurt my foot. Walked on it for a day or two afterwards turned out I shattered my heel and broke my ankle.”

4. That is brutal.

“Tripped over a storage ottoman trying to jump over it all slick.

Got my toes wedged in the latch and broke my foot in 2 places.”

5. Time to tape the toes together.

“I live in Minnesota so I am used to kicking snow off my boots by slamming my toe part of the boot down on the ground.

Well, it was summer and I happened to get my running shoes absolutely covered in mud, so I instinctively slammed my toes down on the pavement and broke my toes.”

6. Right into the shin.

“Stabbed myself in the leg with a piece of metal.

It was really thin and tapered at the tip so when you swung it you would hear this really cool “Whoosh” sound.

I swung down way to hard and it went right into my shin. Bad times.”

7. That is odd.

“I got out of a long, hot shower and noticed a thread dangling off of my shirt, and when I tried to pull it out it just neatly sliced through several millimeters of my finger.

It was so minor I can hardly even call it an injury, but getting cut by a shirt is definitely the stupidest I’ve had.”

8. Funny but painful.

“Was helping husband replace the bathroom fan, so I was standing on the side of the bathtub.

I had this plastic hook glued to the shower wall to hang a loofa on. I went to get down and slid down the wall and hooked my butt cheek to the wall.

It hurt so bad but was also hilarious. I’m in my 40s and this happened recently.”

9. Getting old is no fun.

“I dropped something behind my couch, leaned over the back to pick it up and cracked a rib.

Was in pain for a week. Getting old is hell.”

10. Could’ve been worse.

“To try to get a cheap laugh out of my ex, I threw a hammer as hard as I could at a tree.

The hammer bounced off the tree, and I turned just in time for it to hit me in the small of my back.

Miracle I’m not paralyzed.”

11. An epic tale.

“When I was a kid, maybe 10 or so, I had recently discovered that the feet on my prosthetics could be unscrewed and moved into different positions, so I “borrowed” and Allen key from my dad and took it to school so I could unscrew my feet and show my friends at recess…non of them were as blown away by this as I’d hoped, pretty sure they were just used to this kind of thing by now haha.

Anyway, the bell went to tell us to go back to class and I very quickly tightened the feet back onto the prosthetics, put my shoes back on and started making my way back to class. As I was walking with a group of my classmates I started to notice my legs felt wobbly. I looked down and with every step my feet were turning outwards slightly. A normal person would have come to the conclusion “oh, I didn’t tighten the screws up enough”.

But not me, I jumped to the conclusion of “HOLY SHIT I CAN CONTROL MY FEET LIKE A ROBOT”. My excitement quickly turned to dread when I realised I don’t know how to control feet (been an amputee since I was a baby) and they kept turning until one was pointing sideways. Despite this I kept trying to walk and after a few more steps the foot just fell off and I managed to slam the now footless prosthetic down, which jarred my knee and hips and caused me to slip over and face plant into the corner of a cement mini wall (one of those waist high walls).

Being a self respecting 10yo I started bawling my eyes out, which caught the attention of the new teacher. It’s her first day and the only disabled student is in pieces, (the foot got thrown backwards when it fell off) with a bloodied nose, screaming like a banshee. She didn’t really know what to do since I couldn’t get back up, so she gave me some tissues for my nose and made a very confused call to the maintenance man asking if he knows how to fix prosthetics so I can get to the school nurse.”

12. That is messed up.

“Walked onto a manhole cover that was not placed on correctly.

Ended up in the hospital and had to to have 3 surgeries over 4 months.”

13. Not a good idea.

“My friend saw a jellyfish on the beach then kicked it. Like on purpose and knowing what it was.

They had to go to the ER.”

14. Watch out!

“Riding my bike home in 5th grade slowly alongside my walking friends.

Friend : Drew look where you’re going

Drew : naw dude I’m good at biking I can do it with my eyes closed

Friend : no really dude, look out

Drew : naw man, I’m good

Instantly crashes into a parked car, mess up my bike chain, have to drag my bike home in shame and explain to my mom why my knee and lip are bleeding.”

15. Walking from now on.

“Thought I could walk my dog on a leash while riding my bike. Dog saw a squirrel and yanked me off my bike. I broke a few bones in my hand.

Doc was like “what did you expect would happen?” “

16. Undone by a paper bag.

“Bending over to pick up a paper bag. A completely empty paper grocery store bag. It was standing upright, not even laying on the floor. I barely had to even bend down to pick it up.

Somehow this triggered a cosmic alignment between two vertebrae and nerve cluster because suddenly I fell to the floor in crippling pain, could not get my back straight and had to crawl to the living room so I could lay on the carpeted floor and try to stretch it out. I ended up fucked up like this for days and had to have physical therapy to slowly work out the pinched nerve. I was basically walking like Quasimodo for a couple weeks.

People would assume I was in an accident or lifting some boulder like Hercules or saving a child pinned under a car. But nope. I was undone by an empty paper bag.”

17. This person is definitely accident-prone.

“Wow, so many options.

Most recent. Working under my truck on a slight slope while on a creeper. Grabbed the undercarriage and yanked hard to slide to the back, forgot about slope and used excessive force. I probably would have wound up in the street, had all 250lbs of me not been decelerated by the top of my head hitting the differential. Woke up and it was darker and my neck was sore. I also had a horn like a unicorn (big lump). 2 weeks on concussion watch and wearing a hat to conceal the lump.

Most memorable. 8yo me finds a weird blue light bulb in the creek. Has what looks like mica inclusions in the glass and steel wool instead of a filament. 8yo me goes into the closet with a 9v battery and 2 wires to find out what it looks like lit. I hold it between index and middle finger and apply the wires. Eureka! Like a flash I realize. It’s a flash bulb. I am now blind, in a closet, 2 fingers melted to a hot flash bulb. Keystone Kops antics ensue.

Strangest. Talking to my sister on the landline in the kitchen. I have raccoon hands, always touching things, picking things up, etc while talking. At one point I wind up with a peanut butter cookie and an open flame. Even I don’t know how I got there, lol. Peanut butter cookie winds up on fire. I try to throw it into the sink, miss badly, cookie breaks up and flaming pieces fall on my bare feet. I learn there are a LOT of nerve endings on top of my feet. Screaming somehow communicates problem to sister, who I can hear laughing on the dropped handset.

Bonus. Forgot the cookie lesson regarding nerve endings. Barbecuing in a Weber kettle. In flip flops. I spread out the pile of briquettes once they were ready. Bottom vents were open and hot embers fell on my feet. Poured beer on my feet and increased the vocabulary of nearby children.”

18. Please don’t ever do that again.

“I was separating my eyelashes (because mascara) with a safety pin.

Stabbed myself in the eyeball.”

Wow. Those are pretty…dumb.

How about you? What’s the stupidest way you’ve ever injured yourself?

Don’t be shy! Tell us in the comments!

The post People Share the Stupidest Ways They’ve Injured Themselves appeared first on UberFacts.