Are You Confused About Face Masks? This Doctor Tries Them All for You!

People are now (hopefully) wearing face masks when they’re around people in public, whether voluntarily or because they’re required. Most of us have never worn them before, and we’re understandably a little confused on what we should be buying and why.

If that describes you, this doctor has the answers – and video proof – to all of your questions.

Mostly, Dr. Megan Hall and her experiment is going to give you a solid argument against the people who want to tell you they can’t wear a mask because it’s “hard to breathe” or some nonsense about carbon dioxide poisoning.

From Dr. Megan Hall…Hi friends! I have seen numerous posts and heard people complain they “can’t breathe with a mask…

Posted by Ray Arthur on Tuesday, June 23, 2020

In her post, she wears 4 different masks for 5 minutes each, recording her heart rate and oxygen levels at the start and the finish.

She took wore one of those finger monitors and recorded her heart rate and oxygen saturation with no mask, a surgical mask, a N95 mask, and a N95 plus a surgical mask, which is how your healthcare provider goes about their day.

Her levels were not impacted during any of the experiments – in fact, her oxygen levels improved some here and there.

Image Credit: Facebook

Dr. Hall urges everyone to wear masks, and to not believe the conspiracy theories and politicizations surrounding the topic. They are safe, they do work, and we have to do our best to protect each other through this nightmare.

The last line of her post says “Unless you are face down with a knee on your neck, I’m confident you can still breathe.”

Image Credit: Facebook

Mic. Drop.

If you know someone who doesn’t want to believe the facts about mask-wearing in public, how safe it is, or how much good it can do, please show this to them!

If you’re one of those people, please watch, and reconsider.

If this straightforward take on the topic doesn’t change your mind, I’m not sure what will.

The post Are You Confused About Face Masks? This Doctor Tries Them All for You! appeared first on UberFacts.

July 15, 2020

Are You Confused About Face Masks? This Doctor Tries Them All for You!

If that describes you, this doctor has the answers – and video proof – to all of your questions.

From Dr. Megan Hall…Hi friends! I have seen numerous posts and heard people complain they “can’t breathe with a mask…

Posted by Ray Arthur on Tuesday, June 23, 2020

In her post, she wears 4 different masks for 5 minutes each, recording her heart rate and oxygen levels at the start and the finish.

Her levels were not impacted during any of the experiments – in fact, her oxygen levels improved some here and there.

Image Credit: Facebook

The last line of her post says “Unless you are face down with a knee on your neck, I’m confident you can still breathe.”

Image Credit: Facebook

Mic. Drop.

If you know someone who doesn’t want to believe the facts about mask-wearing in public, how safe it is, or how much good it can do, please show this to them!

If you’re one of those people, please watch, and reconsider.

If this straightforward take on the topic doesn’t change your mind, I’m not sure what will.

The post Are You Confused About Face Masks? This Doctor Tries Them All for You! appeared first on UberFacts.

July 15, 2020

Doctors Share the Best Excuses They’ve Heard From Patients With Something Stuck Wayyy Up Yonder

I have a good friend who’s a nurse and he told me that people come in wayyyyyyy more than you’d think with things stuck in their butts that need to be removed.

Ouch!

And the excuses? They usually sound like total bullshit, as you can probably imagine.

So let’s see exactly what’s going on out there.

AskReddit users shared their painful stories.

1. Let’s try something new.

“Had a guy with a screwdriver up there (handle first).

He was honest. Said the wife wanted to try something new.

Why the screwdriver? Something shaped like a dick would have been gay.

I always thought that was a real weird place to draw that line.”

2. Walking awkwardly.

“Guy comes in, walking kinda awkwardly.

Doesn’t take a seat.

When it’s his turn, he’s called up to triage and again, refuses to sit.

“What brings you in today?” I said.

“I.. uh…. I’ve lost a glass. You know, like a tumbler.”

/Shuffles

“Ok. So, why are you here?”

“Well, we had a party that got out of hand last night. I was cleaning the house this morning and I noticed one of my drinks glasses was missing. And I think it might be up my ass.”

That’s it as far as explanation, but sure enough, there it was on x-ray. Rim-side first, so after it disappeared up his asshole, it basically filled itself with shit.

Now, any time people that know the story ask if I’ve seen something they’ve lost, I ask if they’ve checked their asshole.

3. This is what happened.

“Guy came to my hospital with a cue ball stuck in his rectum. Said him and his wife were having sex and this happened. Made no excuses and showed no shame.

ER doc was unable to remove it with forceps and he had to get anesthesia to have a minor surgical procedure to get it out. My job was basically to just go through a pre surgical check list and send him on his way. When I’m done he shouts excitedly ‘Alright, let’s get this ball rolling!’

I almost died laughing. It was near the end of my shift and I always wonder what happened to him. I’m sure he did fine and is back to having amazing kinky sex with his wife.”

4. Ouch!

“Guy told me he was constipated so he stuck the broom handle up there to break up the poop. I almost believed him.

It was half of a broom handle, cut off and wrapped in electrical tape.

All the way inside…”

5. Fun with Barbie!

“My brother was a triage nurse and examined someone that came in with a barbie doll up their arse….

Don’t know if they were male or female though.”

6. That sounds…terrible.

“My sister is a surgical nurse and a guy came into to the hospital with a pool noodle shoved up his ass. It was so deep that they had to cut open is abdomen, intestines and colon to cut the foam out of him.

He said he “fell on it” while swimming nude. But when they cut him open it had a condom stretched over the end of it.

When they confronted him he said “please don’t tell me wife”.”

7. Back in med school…

“I went to med school in the deep south.

Burly, middle aged southern gentleman showed up in the ED. Chief complaint: rectal pain. After a full history, and physical examination couldn’t ascertain the case of his pain other than him saying “feels like something’s up there,” we decided to start with some X-rays.

Before we obtained them, he says: “Alright I’m gonna be square with you. I was walking down the street, minding my own business, when these thugs jumped me out of nowhere, and held me down and stuck a cucumber up my butt. Please you got to get it out.”

I immediately went to get my attending. One surgical consult and G.I. consult later, a cucumber WRAPPED IN A CONDOM was extracted from this man’s rectum.”

8. Loads of stories.

“Friend is a stomach surgeon so always gets called in to pull things out of arses.

He has loads of stories but the one I remember is a guy who had a glass ketchup bottle up his arse. He’d claimed to have returned home with his grocery shopping, realised he’d lost his key so put shopping down and attempted to climb through a high window.

He slipped, fell backwards arse-first onto his groceries and SHLUM! The ketchup bottle just shot up his a-hole. (Ignore that guy was presumably not naked at time).

After removing it at the hospital, my Dr friend said ‘Thats strange. The ketchup you bought is only half full.’

I think the worst thing is that it suggests he was gonna eat the rest of it another time.”

9. Sounds painful.

“A light bulb.

You could always tell when someone came in to the ER with something lodged in their rectum because everyone would be standing around looking at the X-ray. It was still in perfect light bulb shape.

I have no idea how the patient got it up there without breaking it.”

10. If you loved me…

“Had a patient who showed up with his soon-to-be ex-wife. They were “reconciling” at a nearby motel. She convinced him that if he loved her, he would let her put a dildo in his ass. Only it wasn’t a dildo, it was her vibrator without a flared base.

Rule number one of anal play is make sure that it has a flared base. Rule number two is nothing sharp.

The whole thing went up there and he couldn’t get it out. I had to take it out under anesthesia. She felt awful and was crying the whole time. He was a very blue collar, normal dude and she was dressed in very fancy clothes.

An unlikely match in my mind. He was just happy that they were at my urban hospital and not the uppity town about 15 miles away where they lived.

I often wonder what became of them and their marriage.”

11. I don’t remember…

“A glass water bottle in his ass and he’s desperately trying to find an excuse (not one would really ask at that point actually ) he finally said: I don’t remember who put it there.

Couldn’t you just fell from some stairs or something?”

12. Very interesting…

“My friend is a nurse.

She told me about a guy who came into her ER. He claimed to have fallen out of a tree and a branch went right up his ass. They x rayed him and he had this perfectly round wooden rod up his ass. When they removed it they saw that it was sanded, painted and primed.

That branch must’ve come from a genetically modified species of tree lol.

Do you have any particularly embarrassing medical stories?

If so, please share them with us in the comments.

We can’t wait to hear from you!

The post Doctors Share the Best Excuses They’ve Heard From Patients With Something Stuck Wayyy Up Yonder appeared first on UberFacts.

July 15, 2020

Doctors Share the Best Excuses They’ve Heard From Patients With Something Stuck Wayyy Up Yonder

I have a good friend who’s a nurse and he told me that people come in wayyyyyyy more than you’d think with things stuck in their butts that need to be removed.

Ouch!

And the excuses? They usually sound like total bullshit, as you can probably imagine.

So let’s see exactly what’s going on out there.

AskReddit users shared their painful stories.

1. Let’s try something new.

“Had a guy with a screwdriver up there (handle first).

He was honest. Said the wife wanted to try something new.

Why the screwdriver? Something shaped like a dick would have been gay.

I always thought that was a real weird place to draw that line.”

2. Walking awkwardly.

“Guy comes in, walking kinda awkwardly.

Doesn’t take a seat.

When it’s his turn, he’s called up to triage and again, refuses to sit.

“What brings you in today?” I said.

“I.. uh…. I’ve lost a glass. You know, like a tumbler.”

/Shuffles

“Ok. So, why are you here?”

“Well, we had a party that got out of hand last night. I was cleaning the house this morning and I noticed one of my drinks glasses was missing. And I think it might be up my ass.”

That’s it as far as explanation, but sure enough, there it was on x-ray. Rim-side first, so after it disappeared up his asshole, it basically filled itself with shit.

Now, any time people that know the story ask if I’ve seen something they’ve lost, I ask if they’ve checked their asshole.

3. This is what happened.

“Guy came to my hospital with a cue ball stuck in his rectum. Said him and his wife were having sex and this happened. Made no excuses and showed no shame.

ER doc was unable to remove it with forceps and he had to get anesthesia to have a minor surgical procedure to get it out. My job was basically to just go through a pre surgical check list and send him on his way. When I’m done he shouts excitedly ‘Alright, let’s get this ball rolling!’

I almost died laughing. It was near the end of my shift and I always wonder what happened to him. I’m sure he did fine and is back to having amazing kinky sex with his wife.”

4. Ouch!

“Guy told me he was constipated so he stuck the broom handle up there to break up the poop. I almost believed him.

It was half of a broom handle, cut off and wrapped in electrical tape.

All the way inside…”

5. Fun with Barbie!

“My brother was a triage nurse and examined someone that came in with a barbie doll up their arse….

Don’t know if they were male or female though.”

6. That sounds…terrible.

“My sister is a surgical nurse and a guy came into to the hospital with a pool noodle shoved up his ass. It was so deep that they had to cut open is abdomen, intestines and colon to cut the foam out of him.

He said he “fell on it” while swimming nude. But when they cut him open it had a condom stretched over the end of it.

When they confronted him he said “please don’t tell me wife”.”

7. Back in med school…

“I went to med school in the deep south.

Burly, middle aged southern gentleman showed up in the ED. Chief complaint: rectal pain. After a full history, and physical examination couldn’t ascertain the case of his pain other than him saying “feels like something’s up there,” we decided to start with some X-rays.

Before we obtained them, he says: “Alright I’m gonna be square with you. I was walking down the street, minding my own business, when these thugs jumped me out of nowhere, and held me down and stuck a cucumber up my butt. Please you got to get it out.”

I immediately went to get my attending. One surgical consult and G.I. consult later, a cucumber WRAPPED IN A CONDOM was extracted from this man’s rectum.”

8. Loads of stories.

“Friend is a stomach surgeon so always gets called in to pull things out of arses.

He has loads of stories but the one I remember is a guy who had a glass ketchup bottle up his arse. He’d claimed to have returned home with his grocery shopping, realised he’d lost his key so put shopping down and attempted to climb through a high window.

He slipped, fell backwards arse-first onto his groceries and SHLUM! The ketchup bottle just shot up his a-hole. (Ignore that guy was presumably not naked at time).

After removing it at the hospital, my Dr friend said ‘Thats strange. The ketchup you bought is only half full.’

I think the worst thing is that it suggests he was gonna eat the rest of it another time.”

9. Sounds painful.

“A light bulb.

You could always tell when someone came in to the ER with something lodged in their rectum because everyone would be standing around looking at the X-ray. It was still in perfect light bulb shape.

I have no idea how the patient got it up there without breaking it.”

10. If you loved me…

“Had a patient who showed up with his soon-to-be ex-wife. They were “reconciling” at a nearby motel. She convinced him that if he loved her, he would let her put a dildo in his ass. Only it wasn’t a dildo, it was her vibrator without a flared base.

Rule number one of anal play is make sure that it has a flared base. Rule number two is nothing sharp.

The whole thing went up there and he couldn’t get it out. I had to take it out under anesthesia. She felt awful and was crying the whole time. He was a very blue collar, normal dude and she was dressed in very fancy clothes.

An unlikely match in my mind. He was just happy that they were at my urban hospital and not the uppity town about 15 miles away where they lived.

I often wonder what became of them and their marriage.”

11. I don’t remember…

“A glass water bottle in his ass and he’s desperately trying to find an excuse (not one would really ask at that point actually ) he finally said: I don’t remember who put it there.

Couldn’t you just fell from some stairs or something?”

12. Very interesting…

“My friend is a nurse.

She told me about a guy who came into her ER. He claimed to have fallen out of a tree and a branch went right up his ass. They x rayed him and he had this perfectly round wooden rod up his ass. When they removed it they saw that it was sanded, painted and primed.

That branch must’ve come from a genetically modified species of tree lol.

Do you have any particularly embarrassing medical stories?

If so, please share them with us in the comments.

We can’t wait to hear from you!

The post Doctors Share the Best Excuses They’ve Heard From Patients With Something Stuck Wayyy Up Yonder appeared first on UberFacts.

July 15, 2020

Doctors Talk About the Different Excuses They’ve Heard From People With Objects Stuck in Their A**

Imagine walking into the emergency room and having to explain this kind of problem to a doctor…

That would be totally humiliating.

But it happens. A lot. Probably way more than any of us realize.

Let’s check out these TRUE stories from AskReddit users.

1. I slipped.

“My mom told me about this one when she was doing rounds in the ER.

Guy came in with a bottle of Worcestershire up his butt. Said he was making a sandwich in the shower and slipped and fell on it.”

2. Honesty…

“I have the worst, but possibly the most honest response I’ve gotten.

I was an EMT and ran a call at a methadone clinic. She was a 28 year old female who had possibly OD’d. When we got there she was sitting on the ground completely naked.

My captain asked what was up her ass to which I responded quickly as “trashbag sir” For some reason there was a contractor bag jammed right up her anus. My captain ordered me to remove it and it felt like I was a magician pulling a bunch of napkins out of a dove, or whatever magicians do.

She looks at me without a word. Until I asked her why there was a trash bag up her ass, at which point she responded ” we didn’t have a condom”

This was my second week on the job.”

3. Disgusting!

“I once had to take a guy to the OR to remove a cucumber from his rectum since it had migrated up further than could be extracted manually.

I don’t remember his excuse, but it had been in there for more than a week and when we took it out it had started to pickle…”

4. Air freshener.

“20 years ago, an ex was an ER nurse. A guy came in with a Magic Mushroom air freshener stuck up in there. He was embarrassed, and did not even attempt to explain it.

She said that when the doctor got it out, he said “Funny. It doesn’t smell pine fresh?” And everybody laughed. I am kind of surprised that didn’t lead to a lawsuit.”

5. Wow…

“RN here.

Had a Jehovahs Witness gentleman admitted to ICU with his bowels perforated. States he had constipation so he decided he needed a cleaning. He happens to do pipework so he hooked some pipes up to the hose then inserted the other end in his rectum to just give it the ol’ swish and dump.

Burst his colon from the pressure and/or the hard pipe crammed up his butt. Unfortunate thing was he needed a blood transfusion but oops, he’s a Jehovahs Witness so no go. I learned then that they actually send a group of people to the hospital to watch you and make sure you don’t stray from your faith.

I always wondered what he told them….”

6. Lost count…

“I’ve lost count how many rectal foreign bodies I’ve removed.

But there was this one kid, well teenager. He got a AA battery stuck up his butt. Told his mom that he had been experiencing constipation and thought his butthole was just too small for the poop to get through, so he was trying to dilate it with the battery.

Umm… yeah… OK.

The kicker was that his mom completely bought this story, and she’s there telling me how this whole thing happened to her precious, innocent son.”

7. Happy holidays!

“A Christmas tree.

Not a doctor, my dads coworker had to have an artificial Christmas tree removed from his ass. Getting decorations off the attic, floor fell through, and he crashed through the ceiling and straight onto the Christmas tree.

He had to be airlifted to the hospital. They said the pressure from his jeans getting rammed up there when he fell is probably what saved him from bleeding out. No I don’t know how far it went up there and I don’t want to ask.”

8. It was still on!

“Friend of mine was doing an ED rotation as a medical student and they had a guy come in around 8pm saying he’d internalized something and couldn’t get it out.

They did the triage and asked him to sit down in the waiting area until a doctor was available. For the next few minutes there’s a really strange humming sound every now and then – which they eventually figured out was because the vibrator was still on.

Turns out usually people wait for the batteries to die before coming to hospital, but this fellow had to pick his wife up from the airport at midnight and didn’t have time to wait.”

9. Let’s get to the truth.

“One claimed that he was assaulted and the perp stuck up a dildo up his behind after the attack. He wouldn’t admitted foul play until we were going to call police.

The second one claimed that “he accidentally fell on this candle cup stand (the most common excuse used by these people).”

10. Attached.

“I was a student at the time working in the ER when medics brought in a couple “attached” to each other.

According to them, they were at a pool party when 1) the lights went out 2) as they were swimming around in the dark, they both felt something “crawl” up their asses…Anal beads. One end in the female, the other in the male.

My friend thinks the reason behind this story is because BOTH their significant others were in the waiting room…”

11. Wasn’t paying attention…

“Not a physician yet – still in medical school. On a shadowing rotation, a young woman came into the ER with a cucumber up her butt. When prompted why and how it got there, she responded with “I wasn’t paying attention while I was cooking”.

Her boyfriend had a different story…”

12. Don’t do drugs.

“Mom worked in admitting for the ER.

Guy came in with flashlight stuck.

She asked why he had done it and he said “well, I was on drugs and it seemed like a good idea. Sober me disagrees”.”

13. I’m not buying that…

“Just last week, my patient said she swallowed a toothbrush as a teen, 20 years ago, when asked about the toothbrush in her colon.”

Now it’s your turn!

Have you ever had to admit something totally embarrassing to a doctor?

Or maybe you are a health professional and have heard some real doozies in your life?

Tell us all about it in the comments!

The post Doctors Talk About the Different Excuses They’ve Heard From People With Objects Stuck in Their A** appeared first on UberFacts.

July 15, 2020

Doctors Talk About the Different Excuses They’ve Heard From People With Objects Stuck in Their A**

Imagine walking into the emergency room and having to explain this kind of problem to a doctor…

That would be totally humiliating.

But it happens. A lot. Probably way more than any of us realize.

Let’s check out these TRUE stories from AskReddit users.

1. I slipped.

“My mom told me about this one when she was doing rounds in the ER.

Guy came in with a bottle of Worcestershire up his butt. Said he was making a sandwich in the shower and slipped and fell on it.”

2. Honesty…

“I have the worst, but possibly the most honest response I’ve gotten.

I was an EMT and ran a call at a methadone clinic. She was a 28 year old female who had possibly OD’d. When we got there she was sitting on the ground completely naked.

My captain asked what was up her ass to which I responded quickly as “trashbag sir” For some reason there was a contractor bag jammed right up her anus. My captain ordered me to remove it and it felt like I was a magician pulling a bunch of napkins out of a dove, or whatever magicians do.

She looks at me without a word. Until I asked her why there was a trash bag up her ass, at which point she responded ” we didn’t have a condom”

This was my second week on the job.”

3. Disgusting!

“I once had to take a guy to the OR to remove a cucumber from his rectum since it had migrated up further than could be extracted manually.

I don’t remember his excuse, but it had been in there for more than a week and when we took it out it had started to pickle…”

4. Air freshener.

“20 years ago, an ex was an ER nurse. A guy came in with a Magic Mushroom air freshener stuck up in there. He was embarrassed, and did not even attempt to explain it.

She said that when the doctor got it out, he said “Funny. It doesn’t smell pine fresh?” And everybody laughed. I am kind of surprised that didn’t lead to a lawsuit.”

5. Wow…

“RN here.

Had a Jehovahs Witness gentleman admitted to ICU with his bowels perforated. States he had constipation so he decided he needed a cleaning. He happens to do pipework so he hooked some pipes up to the hose then inserted the other end in his rectum to just give it the ol’ swish and dump.

Burst his colon from the pressure and/or the hard pipe crammed up his butt. Unfortunate thing was he needed a blood transfusion but oops, he’s a Jehovahs Witness so no go. I learned then that they actually send a group of people to the hospital to watch you and make sure you don’t stray from your faith.

I always wondered what he told them….”

6. Lost count…

“I’ve lost count how many rectal foreign bodies I’ve removed.

But there was this one kid, well teenager. He got a AA battery stuck up his butt. Told his mom that he had been experiencing constipation and thought his butthole was just too small for the poop to get through, so he was trying to dilate it with the battery.

Umm… yeah… OK.

The kicker was that his mom completely bought this story, and she’s there telling me how this whole thing happened to her precious, innocent son.”

7. Happy holidays!

“A Christmas tree.

Not a doctor, my dads coworker had to have an artificial Christmas tree removed from his ass. Getting decorations off the attic, floor fell through, and he crashed through the ceiling and straight onto the Christmas tree.

He had to be airlifted to the hospital. They said the pressure from his jeans getting rammed up there when he fell is probably what saved him from bleeding out. No I don’t know how far it went up there and I don’t want to ask.”

8. It was still on!

“Friend of mine was doing an ED rotation as a medical student and they had a guy come in around 8pm saying he’d internalized something and couldn’t get it out.

They did the triage and asked him to sit down in the waiting area until a doctor was available. For the next few minutes there’s a really strange humming sound every now and then – which they eventually figured out was because the vibrator was still on.

Turns out usually people wait for the batteries to die before coming to hospital, but this fellow had to pick his wife up from the airport at midnight and didn’t have time to wait.”

9. Let’s get to the truth.

“One claimed that he was assaulted and the perp stuck up a dildo up his behind after the attack. He wouldn’t admitted foul play until we were going to call police.

The second one claimed that “he accidentally fell on this candle cup stand (the most common excuse used by these people).”

10. Attached.

“I was a student at the time working in the ER when medics brought in a couple “attached” to each other.

According to them, they were at a pool party when 1) the lights went out 2) as they were swimming around in the dark, they both felt something “crawl” up their asses…Anal beads. One end in the female, the other in the male.

My friend thinks the reason behind this story is because BOTH their significant others were in the waiting room…”

11. Wasn’t paying attention…

“Not a physician yet – still in medical school. On a shadowing rotation, a young woman came into the ER with a cucumber up her butt. When prompted why and how it got there, she responded with “I wasn’t paying attention while I was cooking”.

Her boyfriend had a different story…”

12. Don’t do drugs.

“Mom worked in admitting for the ER.

Guy came in with flashlight stuck.

She asked why he had done it and he said “well, I was on drugs and it seemed like a good idea. Sober me disagrees”.”

13. I’m not buying that…

“Just last week, my patient said she swallowed a toothbrush as a teen, 20 years ago, when asked about the toothbrush in her colon.”

Now it’s your turn!

Have you ever had to admit something totally embarrassing to a doctor?

Or maybe you are a health professional and have heard some real doozies in your life?

Tell us all about it in the comments!

The post Doctors Talk About the Different Excuses They’ve Heard From People With Objects Stuck in Their A** appeared first on UberFacts.

July 15, 2020

Health Care Professionals Talk About People Who Came in With Objects Stuck in Their Butts

That was a terrible accident!

I don’t know how that got there!

Where am I?

Doctors hear all kinds of bogus excuses and stories, particularly when it comes to things that ARE STUCK IN SOMEONE’S ASS.

And yes, these things apparently happen all the time.

Are you ready to be entertained?

Let’s take a look at these stories from folks on AskReddit.

1. OH MY GOD.

“A college friend who is an OR nurse said the best thing she ever witnessed was a small snow globe with the message “World’s Greatest Dad” on the inside.”

2. Love triangle.

“Saw someone with a remote control stuck way up in their colon. She said she was “getting herself ready,” for anal sex with her boyfriend and then it got stuck.

The kicker was that she showed up to the hospital with her boyfriend AND her husband in tow!”

3. Mom!

“My ex is a ER nurse.

One night she sent me a pic of her computer of what she was working on. 16yo male brought in by his mother. Shoved a sausage up his ass and “lost” it. Imagine the embarrassment of telling mom … hey mom. I lost a sausage in my ass. Can you take me to the ER.

Fuckin kids.”

4. Come on, buddy…

“Had one guy tell me he slipped on a banana peel and landed on the upright vase on the floor.

He then proceeded to produce a banana peel for good measure.”

5. Holy sh*t.

“When I was a student working in an ER a guy came in with an unraveled wire hanger stuck and hooked up there.

He said he was trying to fish out the vibrator he lost.”

6. Hello?

“Guy came in with a cordless phone up his ass, like one of the old-school ones from 15 years ago.

He said that when he was in the kitchen bending over opening the oven door, someone threw it through his open window and it just went right up.”

7. An accident.

“It always boils down to the person “accidentally” sat on it.

The best my dad saw – a former emergency doctor – was a young guy who “accidentally” sat on a giant tub of vaseline. Accidentally.

I asked how doctors record that in their patient files, and the common way to do so is to say “the patient claims to have sat on x object.””

8. Don’t do that anymore, sir.

“Had this elderly guy come in with a cucumber up there. First month of residency, so my attending asks why did you put that up there? Guy, dead normal, says “well it was just like every Tuesday. I woke up, made some coffee, and sat on a cucumber.”

Stifling laughter my attending just said, “sir you shouldn’t do that anymore.”

He says “ok.” We removed it and never saw him again.”

9. That’s messed up.

“ER nurse: “I tried to dig something out of my ass with a BBQ skewer.”

Skewer got stuck. Ripped a hole in his intestines. He waited so long to come in he was septic. One STAT OR visit and an ICU stay later, “please don’t call my mom”.

Guy was tripping hard on LSD.”

10. Still telling jokes!

“Guy puts a vibrator (one of the massive cordless wand types) waaaaay up there, like a mega seed, and it gets sucked into the sigmoid colon.

When he gets to me in the ER I ask him how he was feeling. He answered, “well doc, I’m way better since the batteries died.”

Made my night.”

11. Honestly is the best policy.

“”I stuck it up there on purpose and now it’s stuck. Please help”

It was a perfectly honest and valid reason for have something stuck up your ass, and we helped. No further questions needed.”

12. I went to investigate.

“Presented at ER in Sydney with carrot stuck in the arse. Doctor: “What happened?”

Patient: ” I heard a noise in the garden. Went to investigate. Slipped and fell over. Carrot went up my bum.”

Doctor: “Carrots grow upside-down out your way huh?””

13. Naked gardening.

“Mostly bottles or vegetables. The aubergine was the biggest but potatoes and carrots seem to be popular.

Ketchup, mayo and glass cola bottles were common at one point. Also one butt plug and a toilet brush.

The last two were honest and very distraught. Others all had naked gardening stories.

There’s an even worse question you haven’t asked which is for things people have shoved up their urethras, only men in my experience.”

Okay, now it’s your turn!

In the comments, tell us about some embarrassing medical stories that either happened to you or that you know about.

Please and thank you!

Photo Credit: did you know?

Source 1 Source 2

10. I love this!

Cheech and Chong for President and Vice President! Think it might happen…?

Photo Credit: did you know?

Source 1

Now we’d like to hear from you!

In the comments, please tell us about something really interesting that you’ve learned recently.

Share a link, a photo, or just tell us about it.

Thanks in advance!

Photo Credit: did you know?

Source 1 Source 2 Source 3

10. Suffering from OCD.

What a strange life he had.

Photo Credit: did you know?

Source 1 Source 2 Source 3

Some great facts in there, no doubt about it!

Now we want to hear from you.

In the comments, please share something interesting that has surprised you lately.

We can’t wait to hear from you!

The post Enjoy These Quality Facts That May Teach You Something appeared first on UberFacts.

July 11, 2020

People Confess the Most Hurtful Thing a Doctor Ever Told Them

The doctor-patient relationship is one of the most sensitive trusts we have and it’s the one that can hurt the most when it’s callously broken.

Here’s the thing. Just because someone was smart (or lucky) enough to get through medical school and land a job, it doesn’t mean they know everything about everything (or even everything about anything outside their scope of expertise).

Not only that, but people are still formed by their experiences, their prejudices, the words and actions of their parents…which is to say, sometimes doctors aren’t very nice, or very tactful, and should have just kept their big mouths shut.

Here are 15 times like that, and I’m guessing most of these people are still working on getting over it.

15. Omg it’s Elaine Benes.

He asked me if I felt lonely

I said I don’t think of myself as lonely

He wrote down Lonely and underlined it.

14. What does that even mean, though?

My female doctor, now retired, once told me I had great birthing hips. I’m a male.

13. Unless he was talking about the size of the lump, I guess.

I went to get a lump on my groin checked out, and had to remove my underpants.

The doctor started a whole speech about “size isn’t everything”, which isn’t what I went there for.

12. Teenage girls get the short end of every stick.

When I was in middle school until 10th grade, I would get violent nausea anytime I got hungry.

It felt like my stomach was on fire, and I would miss a lot of school from feeling like shit (although I was a good student and wasn’t falling behind in any way). After a lot of fighting with my mother who accused me of exaggerating, she agrees to take me to a gastroenterologist to be checked out. Before agreeing to do an endoscopy, the gastro accused me of exaggerating because I was a teen girl and that’s just apparently what young women do, he suggested I was just making up these symptoms for attention, and then asked me point blank if I was lying about my pain level to skip school and suggested I had a mental health issue I was trying to cover for.

I had fucking GERD and severe acid reflux, as confirmed by the endoscopy he reluctantly agreed to perform on me. Instead of letting it go, the gastro made a point of angrily telling me that I had “the stomach of a 80 year old man” and must have been intentionally eating in a way to fuck up my stomach.

I have a family history of stomach problems and GERD. I don’t understand why it was so implausible that my brother could have acid reflux at a young age, but I must be a hysterical liar when I claim to have the same symptoms in my teens.

11. Maybe it was supposed to be a compliment? Sort of?

He said I should be happy carrying around a bit of weight.

Because in drought the fattest cows die last…. Seriously wtf

10. Imagine having the gall to tell someone they shouldn’t have procreated…after the fact.

When I was about 4 I got diagnosed with child asthma, doctor told my mum it was her fault because she decided to have a child despite having asthma herself…

9. I mean, at least she said nothing was wrong with you? Ugh.

I had gained a lot of weight around my mid section a few years back, and my periods stopped. I was scared, young, and thought I was pregnant, but the tests came back negative. I went to a doctor to have myself checked out and she did some basic tests before telling me.

“There is nothing wrong with you, you’re just fat”

I already had some body confidence issues, but hearing it from my doctor, when I was trying really hard to get in shape, really hurt, I worked hard to lose weight, but my belly wouldn’t shrink, I was starting to feel really sick, and went back to the doctor, who again told me it was that I was just fat. I was crushed.

A year later I went to the hospital for something unrelated, and it was discovered that I had a giant Ovarian Cyst, about the size of a newborn. It was throwing off my hormones, making me gain weight, among many other issues. I have since lost weight and am feeling super confident now, but that doctor really messed me up for a long time.

8. And that’s how that doctor died…

In the ER, about six months pregnant, with heavy spotting and no noticeable fetal movement. Idiot doctor is unable to find the baby’s heartbeat.

Just looks up at me and says, “Yep, probably dead in there.” He couldn’t possibly have said it in a more casual, offhand manner.

Note: I delivered my son three months later, perfectly healthy.

7. This kind of doesn’t surprise me.

First hospital visit: “there’s nothing wrong with your foot, now get your shoe back on and get back to work you fucking malingerer” after a solely visual inspection.

2 days of getting smoked all day long

Second Hospital visit: “Why are you walking on that foot, it’s obviously broken! Someone get that soldier some crutches!

6. To be fair, treating two-year-olds has to be rough.

Wife took our 2 y/o daughter to the doctor because she was sick and her behaviour seemed to be changing. She couldn’t eat or drink. Our local doctor said that’s how kids are sometimes and just monitor her behaviour.

As we were pretty sure there was something definitely wrong we kept seeing different doctors. Last one said we were acting hysterically and our behaviour were a problem. 5 days later our daughter seemed to had a seizure so we went to the hospital. Our daughter had a brain tumor and the doctor at the hospital said this should have been recognized sooner.

He was astounded that we’ve seen 5 doctors all blaming us as parents to “just be acting up over nothing”.

5. You have to advocate for yourself, for sure.

“It’s all between your ears” after missing at least one, but probably two crippling vitamin deficiencies by not ordering the right test.

It took me two and a half years of thinking I was lazy and pathetic before I went to another doctor and got diagnosed.

4. I think she might have chosen the wrong profession.

“I’m sure it’s not that bad”

The intake nurse at the in patient psychiatric unit I was checking myself into after a suicide attempt following a sexual assault.

3. I mean it’s not bad advice, but it’s not always the right advice, either.

Was having digestive issues I eventually learned were a result of my undiagnosed cancer.

Doctor suggested I should wipe better.

2. They’re just sadists with newer magazines.

Different kind of doctor, but a dentist (after poking that sharp piece of steel into my not dead yet gums)

“Oh come, on, it doesn’t hurt that much!” after I jumped and said “ow!”

I looked at him, got up and walked out.

I now have a very nice dentist

1. He was just being (mean and) helpful.

I went to get an earache checked and the first thing the doctor said was “Yeah so I’m gonna put you on some medicine for the ear but we’ve gotta do something about your face, your acne is absolutely terrible.”

Thanks doc.

I am appalled and secondhand angry, how about you?

I’m totally sorry if this has ever happened to you – tell us about it in the comments if you want!

The post People Confess the Most Hurtful Thing a Doctor Ever Told Them appeared first on UberFacts.