Category: Funny

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Tweets That Prove Dogs Are Simply the Best

General Charles De Gaulle once said, “The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.”

Which makes sense. I mean, you don’t have to be affected by the horrors of war to know that dogs are better than people.

All you have to do is like, look at a puppy. And then look at a human. Which one of them are you more likely to start petting? Exactly.

Here are ten tweets from people who know all about the dog life.

10. Super cool

Hey, there’s a little somethin’ extra, just for you.

9. Chill pills

Not sure this is veterinarian level advice but it sounds like fun so I’ll take it.

8. Picture perfect

And yet when I do the same thing but with pictures of people I’m a “stalker” who “needs to go to jail.”

7. The Stick of Destiny

It’s like Xeno’s paradox, but with sticks, and dogs, so better.

6. Dog day afternoon

This is a perfect list, where do I apply?

5. Barks and bites

Thank you for bringing your delightful chaos yet again in our home, pupper.

4. A leg up

I feel like one of them is getting the wrong end of this partnership.

3. Storage capacity

At the time of writing the top tier iPhones have roughly enough storage capacity for 100,000 doggo pictures. You’re probably set?

2. Have your cake

From each according to their abilities, to each according to their needs.

1. Suit of armor

Never fear, m’lady. I am sir Goodboi of Heckinshire.

Now somebody get me a dog. I need to pet one. IMMEDIATELY.

What’s your dog like?

Tell us all about them in the comments.

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Dog Memes to Improve Your Life

Elizabeth Taylor once famously said, “Some of my best leading men have been dogs and horses.”

Personally, I don’t have a lot of experience with horses, but I can see how dogs would be preferable to most dudes.

Because dogs are amazing, as these memes will attest.

15. Paws off

I am the chosen one and you shall not intervene.

Via: Someecards

14. Holding steady

My whole life is built around this heckin’ good boi.

Via: Someecards

13. All the right words

I never thought of it this way, and now I’m having an existential crisis.

Via: Someecards

12. Heaven can wait

We don’t deserve dogs.

Via: Someecards

11. The inner circle

Note how 2020 is left blank.

Via: Someecards

10. Simple solutions

We have a lot to learn from the canines.

Via: Someecards

9. Ride or die

He’s bad to the bone.

Via: Someecards

8. That bites

Here kitty, kitty, kitty.

Via: Someecards

7. Paws for reflection

None of us stand a chance against this.

Via: Someecards

6. Glorious food

You try eating the same thing every day and see how YOU like it.

Via: Someecards

5. Vet your response

I see right through your deception, Kevin.

Via: Someecards

4. Sniff ’em out

You’ve got a lot of explaining to do.

Via: Someecards

3. High praise

You are at least ten thousand candles in the wind.

Via: Someecards

2. On a roll

Dream on, pupper. These delicacies are all for me.

Via: Someecards

1. A girl’s best friend

If I had a genie it would be my very first wish, no question.

Via: Someecards

Here’s to dogs – may we some day deserve them.

What’s your doggo like?

Tell us all about them in the comments.

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A Patient Pulled an Ingenious Trick to Get a Quick Appointment

There’s a meme out there that one of the worst parts of “adulting” is making appointments for yourself. I mean, who wants to like, speak to a person and schedule a responsibility?

What’s worse is when the places we’re trying to go seem to have policies designed specifically to keep you from easily doing so.

Which is weird. Like, don’t you all want my money? Work with me here.

Luckily, there are ways around this sort of thing. They require a little cleverness and a lot of nerve, but they can be pulled off in style, like Tumblr user hotmolasses explains.

Step 1: Try to Walk-In

You think we’re gonna let just anybody in here? Think again.

Step 2: Make the Call

The fact that they didn’t even bother walking out of the lobby first just kills me.

Step 3: Make an Appointment

How can you miss that this is happening right in front of you? Don’t you hear the echo?

Step 4: Confirm

The fact that she was mad about it is the icing on the cake.

Step 5: Satisfaction

Now share the story far and wide.

You don’t have to be a full-blown Karen to get your way as a customer. Just apply a little wit and flair, and you’ll be well on your way to checking that errand off your to-do list.

What’s a strange loophole you’ve used before?

Tell us about it in the comments.

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This Guy Used a Weird “DIY” Lifehack to Outsmart a Mechanic

It’s pretty much a meme at this point that any time you think you’re doing OK in life or you finally have some money saved, that’s when car problems strike and ruin absolutely everything. It’s a huge problem for me, a mechanically inept person.

My grandfather knows absolutely everything about cars, my dad knows some things, I know nothing. Following this pattern I assume my future son will not even understand what a car is.

Mechanical issues are of course exacerbated by unscrupulous mechanics who know that you can’t fix the problem on your own and will come up with all sorts of ways to trap you into paying way too much for a process that’s actually pretty simple. I need a new headlight installed. How long does that take? 10 minutes? 4 hours? I have no idea. I’m at the mercy of the guy quoting me a price.

Unless, of course, I come up with an ingenious plan, like this Tumblr user did.

Step 1: Identify the Problem

Nothing like a little bit of price gouging to start off a good story.

Step 2: Shop Around

Hey man, I’m just trying to play my part here.

Step 3: Find an Alternative Route

If you wanna play, we can play.

Step 4: Do It Yourself

When your own incompetence is secretly your greatest weapon.

Step 5: Revel in the Satisfaction

Holy, indeed.

So there ya have it. A life hack for those of us who are mechanically challenged. Go forth, and save some dough.

What weird loophole have you used to save money?

Tell us in the comments.

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Here’s How to Skip Those Pesky Cancellation Fees

Reception desk jobs are kind of weird.

You’re there to be a pleasant presence to help folks navigate whatever is on offer, but you also have to be a sort of busy bureaucrat, enforcing rules with a smile on your face and confusing or enraging customers/clients in the process through no fault of your own.

Which is all to say, I don’t envy the folks who have to hold those jobs, but I also don’t envy me when I find myself caught up in conversations with them over some very unfair nonsense. Luckily, for anyone willing to look hard enough, there’s usually some loophole to be exploited that doesn’t just involve screaming to get your way.

You can be polite AND skirt the rules, as this story by Reddit user Stellapotamus demonstrates.

Step 1: Try to Cancel

When you notice something about the notice.

Step 2: Just Reschedule

Put it whenever you want, I’m not coming anyway.

Step 3: Turn the Tables

Is this really the first time someone tried this?

Bonus: Internet Edition

Pretty much anything that can be done to stick it to Comcast is worthwhile.

As they say…

I need this embroidered on a pillow.

So there ya have it. Need to stop something but don’t wanna pay for the privilege? Get on board with his particular brand of “cancel” culture.

What’s a weird loophole you’ve exploited to save money?

Share your tips in the comments.

Thanks, fam!

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Funny Texts That Human Beings Actually Sent to Each Other

It’s kind of hard to imagine a world without text messaging…

I have one friend who likes to buck the system and he refuses to get texting on his phone, but every single other person I know has the ability to send text messages.

With that many people sending messages out into the world, there’s bound to be a ton of ridiculous, embarrassing, and hilarious moments for us to enjoy.

And here are a bunch! Let’s take a look.

1. That didn’t end well.

Nice try though, Frankie…you did your best.

2. It’s going to be a glorious decade!

Get ready for it!

3. That sounds very awkward.

Let’s talk about your daughter…

4. That’s what friends are for.

Come on over, I’ll be here for you…

5. You should have waited for a response.

But what’s done is done.

6. You made a terrible choice.

And you’ll never be the same ever again.

7. You gotta do it the right way.

These are words to live by.

8. That problem was not washed away.

Oh, and we need to talk.

9. Hahahaha. This is great.

I wonder if she learned a lesson.

10. You are really classin’ it up!

Keep up the great work!

11. At least this person is being very honest.

Germans are…not know for their humor so much…

12. You earned it.

Here’s to a job well done!

13. This is a real tragedy.

We are sorry for your loss.

Okay, it’s confession time…

Have you sent any texts or received any that really made you cringe?

If so, please tell us about them in the comments. We won’t make fun of you…too much. Thanks!

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Funny Text Messages That People Probably Regret They Sent

If you’re like 99% of the population, you’ve probably sent some text messages in your life that you wish you could take back.

But hey, the chances are pretty good that your texts didn’t end up on the hilarious “Texts From Last Night” Instagram page…because that’s when you know that you’ve really screwed up.

But these folks weren’t so lucky. But hey, at least we get to laugh at them, and that’s definitely a bright spot…for us…

Enjoy these texts that people probably wish they could take back…

1. That was a little rough.

But…maybe you had it coming.

2. I hope she remembers you…

You did a good deed.

3. We all do this sometimes.

Hey, don’t feel bad about it!

4. This takes a lot of…guts.

Might as well knock it out with one shot.

5. Katie is the honest woman we need right now.

Thank you, Katie…

6. Sounds like a wild night.

I’m sorry I missed out on it!

7. You’re setting a great example.

We tip our hats to you!

8. Don’t compare me to a wall!

I resent that remark!

9. Ouch…not messing around here.

Now, tell us what you did to deserve this.

10. You gotta get the name right, bro.

Nice effort, though.

11. This could really go either way.

Good luck out there…and be careful…

12. Speaking the truth.

And the truth hurts, doesn’t it?

How about you?

Have you sent any cringeworthy texts lately that you regret? Or maybe you’ve received some real whoppers?

If so, tell us about them in the comments. Thanks!

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Dank Memes to Help Satisfy All Your Scrolling Needs

Once in a while, we all just need to totally unplug and mindlessly indulge good ol’ memes.

Luckily for you, we have a fresh drop of 11 dank memes that’ll help you scratch that scrolling itch.

1. The definition of stress

This was one of the more riveting parts of being on the bus home from middle school.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

2. The sixth love language

Listen, all things considered, we should take whatever we can get from cats.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

3. The ultimate hack

We all really thought that we pulled a fast one on Dora by doing this.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

4. Society’s lies

That’s one way to disillusion an entire class of kids real quick.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

5. Only the dankest

With the way all of 2020 went, this is truly the only way to survive what’s to come in 2021.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

6. Major oof

It was always the absolute most whenever your teacher laid the smackdown like this.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

7. Terrifying

This was easily the worst part of childhood.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

8. I’ve got a bad feeling about this

Anyone else feel like the world is still on fire?

Image Credit: theCHIVE

9. It’s the simple things

At least the astrological bodies are still working.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

10. The real MVP here

Honestly, this phrase is a total lifesaver in any essay. Literally anything could be encompassed in “etc.” so you can continue to look well-read while preventing yourself from saying something totally inaccurate.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

11. Love isn’t real

When stuff like this happens, it’s just hard to believe in the good in the world.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

Ah, to recapture that feeling of total superiority of tricking a cartoon character.

There are some childhood pleasures that can only exist in the past, so it’s a good thing we have memes to help preserve them.

Do you have any memes that always give you a good chuckle? Share them with us in the comments!

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Spicy Memes to Help Your Day Be a Lot Funnier

It’s almost the end of the week, so you know what that means: it’s time for more memes. Here are 13 delightfully raunchy memes that are sure to give your weekend some extra kick.

1. This is the worst

All the missed opportunities – they haunt us.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

2. Aww

That’s comforting – in a weird way.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

3. RIP 2020

Am I eating because I’m bored, or am I bored because I’m just eating?

Image Credit: theCHIVE

4. Pretty much

We all know that immediate feeling of repulsion.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

5. Oops

Some people just have the worst luck finding love, but hang in there. It’ll happen eventually – right?

Image Credit: theCHIVE

6. Talk about a warning sign

I’d take this as a cue to make an immediately beeline out of there.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

7. An uncomfortable truth

Not all Russian men*, but this is a pretty crazy phenomenon.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

8. Why

Why, oh why would any animal scientist come up with this term? This gives a whole new meaning to military green.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

9. We all know where this is going

While a cool idea in concept, this will probably end up giving your cat some major zoomies.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

10. Major burn

Way to double down on an absolutely gut-punch of a comeback.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

11. Accurate

A little oxidization never hurt anybody.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

12. Only true champions know

This is actually the best feeling, and nobody can argue with me about it.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

13. Oh no

Talk about a very poor choice of words here.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

Well, that meme dump really hit the spot. Honestly, some of them were a little bit TMI… but hey, who are we to police the way people express themselves through the sheer artistry of meme-making?

What are some of your favorite raunchy memes? Share them with us in the comments!

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Memes to Distract Us All From That Impending Existential Dread

The world is currently in shambles and life as we used to know it is still nowhere in sight.

Good thing there’s always a new batch of memes fresh off the internet to cheer us up in the meme-time (haha.)

Here are 12 more dank memes to help take your mind off everything that’s falling apart in society.

1. This

We’ve all encountered that type of person who will just blindly speak for their friend.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

2. A real kitchen nightmare

I wouldn’t know whether to be excited that the living meme Gordon Ramsey was in the room or to be horrified that I was just about to eat at a nightmare restaurant.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

3. Winners only

An accurate depiction of how one passes the time during quarantine.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

4. Please, no

My tiny spirit can only handle so much…

Image Credit: theCHIVE

5. Drama lives everywhere

Even a subject as dry as math cannot save you from the affairs of the heart.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

6. Awkward

Like, hello? Where’s the instant validation that we all crave and need?

Image Credit: theCHIVE

7. Actually heartbreaking

As if the world wasn’t cruel enough this year, then sh*t like this happens.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

8. Way too accurate

Quarantine fifteen? More like quarantine fifty.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

9. This one’s a lot

Only kids could manage to say something so innocently misconstrued.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

10. Always age with grace

Honestly, green suits her.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

11. Life changing

The entire Earth might be in shambles, but at least the sky’s the same!

Image Credit: theCHIVE

12. The absolute worst feeling

Text her – it’s never too late.

Image Credit: theCHIVE

I’m serious about that last one. With every bit of normalcy we’ve come to know absolutely obliterated in the last year, you might as well shoot your shot. Sometimes, memes have the power to seal your destiny like that.

What are some of your favorite memes to help distract yourself from the fact that the world is still falling apart? Share them with us in the comments so we can all indulge in a healthy amount of escapism!

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