Category: Funny

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Pilots Discuss What They Wish They Could Tell Passengers

Being a pilot is not easy and it comes with a ton of pressure to keep everyone on board safe and comfortable.

I’ve been on enough plane rides to know that the seatbelt sign is on for a reason. I’ve found turbulence can pretty uncomfortable and usually a few passengers voice their displeasure when it happens. Unfortunately, turbulence isn’t the only thing pilots have to worry about.

Pilots are human beings like us and they think of lots of things in addition to lifting off, flying and landing.

Here are 13 confessions from pilots they wish people knew but will never share.

1. Taking off brings out their inner child

You would say it, too.

I love to watch the skyline tilt as the plane ascends. It makes me feel like I’m a kid on my way to Disney World again!

Source: Whisper

2. Prankster

That’ll keep ’em awake. Unfortunately none of my pilots have cracked jokes over the AV system.

Source: Whisper

3. Not immune to fear

Facing their fears every day. Inspiring!

I don’t think I could do this job. I enjoy flying, but I’m not good with heights.

Source: Whisper

4. Sleepy head

A passenger seat is better for a cat nap.

I’ve never seen a pilot asleep in the cabin, but if I was a pilot, I think I would consider doing it.

I’m nocturnal, so it could happen!

Source: Whisper

5. Not perfect

Hey, it’s a lot to memorize! There are so many things to remember and manage. It’s remarkable.

Source: Whisper

6. The sky is their playground

But they’ll put the seatbelt sign on, at least. Thank goodness none of my pilots ever did this.

The image of the heart is on point because mine would be out of my chest!

Source: Whisper

7.  A hero

We’d all want to brag about it, to be honest.

All of my flights have been flown by very professional, skilled pilots, which means flying hasn’t exactly exciting.

I don’t have a wild personal story about a heroic pilot, but I treasure feeling safe.

Source: Whisper

8. Wow

So it’s not just in the movies, then.

I really hope this isn’t common among pilots. It disturbs me that it happens at all.

Source: Whisper

9. Sleep-Deprived

Not exactly a comforting thing to read. I’m going to be thinking about this the next time I’m on a plane. (Shudders)

Source: Whisper

10. No room for illness

The stakes are high. I can’t imagine how stressful it would be to wonder if your health or a perceived health issue could end your career.

Source: Whisper

11. A Power Trip

Well that’s one way to pass the time…

I loved to pull stunts like this as a kid when I was bored, but as an adult at work? I’m not sure.

Caption: Whisper

12. They pay a price for a career in the sky

That’s so sad. Poor kid. I would have missed my dad so much if he was absent this much.

Source: Whisper

13. Their thoughts can be darker than an overnight flight

Horror movie material. I hope pilots are evaluated for problematic thoughts.

Source: Whisper

Next time I get on the plane I’m definitely going to wonder what my pilots have gone through in their careers and I’m grateful all of my flights have been uneventful — not even any screaming children!

I will make a point to thank my pilots on my next flight — whenever that will be.

Has your pilot ever shared any stories with the passengers about life in the skies?

Leave us a comment.

The post Pilots Discuss What They Wish They Could Tell Passengers appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Talk About the Reasons They Leave Their Engagement Rings at Home

Most of us have been there. Your ring is too loose, too tight, too… something. Or maybe it just doesn’t match your other jewelry.

Here are some of the ten crazy reasons why women choose to leave the bling behind.

1. Sometimes you just forget

But honestly, watch out if you do! You might start to regret it.

Image credit: Whisper

2. All that shine can be a little blinding

But that’s okay, because who doesn’t love shiny?
Just pair your ring with sunglasses, and you’ll be fine.

Image credit: Whisper

3. All dolled up with nowhere to go

Jewelry is like pants. If you’re not going out, who needs ’em?

Image credit: Whisper

4. It’s only a symbol

Isn’t it more evolved to be above all that?
The ring won’t get you through the tough times.

Image credit: Whisper

5. But it’s a symbol of him

In other words, he better be worth it.
Otherwise, it might be a symbol that you should give it back.

Image credit: Whisper

6. Cheap, or just hypersensitive?

But seriously though, if the ring gives you a rash, did it come from a vending machine?
Don’t get mad. Buy better jewelry!

Image credit: Whisper

7. Enough is enough

And two rings is just one too many sometimes.
After all, no one likes a showoff.

Image credit: Whisper

8. It’s not that weird

We all take things off in our sleep. Right?

Image credit: Whisper

9. Maybe she learned the hard way

Comfort is key.
Take it off while you’re awake… so that you don’t take it off when you’re not.

Image credit: Whisper

10. Ladies gotta do what we gotta do

When it’s ugly, and you just can’t tell him… maybe it’s time to “lose” it?

Image credit: Whisper

These are all completely understandable reasons to leave the rock at home.

Personally, I haven’t worn mine since the start of the pandemic. Too much hand-washing for that business.

What about you? Do you still wear your engagement ring? Be sure to share why or why not in the comments.

The post People Talk About the Reasons They Leave Their Engagement Rings at Home appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Share Their True Stories That No One Ever Believes

As a writer, I read true stories all the time that I think I could never use in a book because readers would roll their eyes and call it unbelievable. It must be frustrating to be the owner of one of those stories and never be able to tell them without people thinking you’re a liar, right?

These 13 people have exactly those kinds of tales, and if you say you’re not curious to hear them, I’d say you’re the one who’s not telling the truth.

13. Huh. So it only takes one.

I saw a bird unscrew a lightbulb once.

Yep. Just 1. It worked at it for a long time.

12. Witchcraft.

I knocked a cup of coffee off my counter and caught it and no coffee spilled out of it.

11. She knows what she saw.

Short story: birds + sockets don’t mix.

Long story: I was 5 & we’d just moved to a new house. My mom had sent me outside to play while she unpacked stuff. The house had recessed can lighting under the eaves on the outside. There was a bird in one of the light fixtures trying to unscrew a bulb (presumably to build a nest or something, but it was in the fall). It was using its wings, feet, & body pressure to work the bulb around. I went inside like 5 times trying to get my mom to come outside to look, help me scare of the bird, help the bird or whatever. I was constantly met with the response of “[my name] birds can’t unscrew lightbulbs, go play.”

It eventually got the bulb unscrewed, but the bulb flipped upside down & blocked the hole on the light fixture. Unfortunately, Birdy electrocuted itself. I went inside & told my mom “Well, it got it out.” Then went back to play. She laughed it off assuming it was just part of a make-believe story or something.

My dad came home, I pointed it out to him. He got the ladder, fixed the bulb & removed the body. Both parents were sad they didn’t get to see a bird unscrew a lightbulb. It never happened again in the 15 years we lived at that house.

As a result, whenever my 4-year-old tells me I need to see something cool…I drop whatever & go look. Just in case it’s a bird unscrewing a lightbulb or something. Lol

10. A great cross to bear.

One time when I was a teenager I was playing pool with friends. The pizza arrived or whatever and I took one last shot just as everyone was leaving and sank like five balls.

It was the single best move I have ever made in any game I have ever played, but no one saw it and there was no way to take credit for it without sounding like a liar.

9. You can’t unknow this.

I saw a bee eat a piece of cheese. It was horrifying. I didn’t know it was possible.

Bees will eat human flesh if they get desperate enough, but it has to be already dead.

8. Anyone who owns goats would definitely believe this.

Was doing a service call at an equestrian farm. I went to the bathroom in the barn to take a leak, the door was slightly ajar and the light was off.

I pushed open the door and hit the light only to see a goat dressed in a fleece vest eating toilet paper off the roll.

He gave me this look like to say “wtf are you looking at?” I turned off the light and left.

7. I can imagine his face in this moment.

I once threw the inside of a pen at least 9ft clear across a room and skewered a fly that was annoying me.

Legit I felt like a ninja and have no way to prove it to anyone.

Not gonna lie It’s probably my peak and it’s all been downhill ever since.

6. That would have made me squeal.

Heath Ledger was sitting in my seat on an airplane when I was about 13 on a family holiday.

I knew him only from 10 Things I Hate About You at the time and it was my FAVOURITE FILM EVER.

He was in the right seat but on the wrong plane and jumped up and ran across the tarmac – simpler time, small airport in Spain. No one ever believes me!!

5. She has a type, I think.

My ex (American, met him in the US) and my other ex (Dutch, met him three years later in Argentina) work at the same office in Amsterdam. They are colleagues. I found out cause I saw a fb post in which they were at the same office (2 years after me and Dutchie broke up). And I still live in Argentina!

Also, some years ago, I was in a relationship with a guy. We lived together in a tiny apartment. The relationship ended in a terrible way. Four years later, I started dating another guy. He takes me to his house. It was the apartment I used to share with my ex.

And let me tell you, Buenos Aires is a HUGE city.

4. It’s almost like he knew…

Was in a bookstore once and my friend being a huge Doctor Who fan was looking at some Doctor Who books in the Sci fi section while I looked at Star Wars books.

I came around the bookcase to see what he was looking at and I started saying how boring Doctor Who is. I then started roasting particular actors who had played the Doctor. Especially Colin Baker. I was ripping into this guy and how shit of an actor he is and over acted everything and was just the worst Doctor ever.

My friend and I both looked up and standing where I had been standing 5 minutes before with this huge grin on his face was Colin f*cking Baker.

3. He must be a Jedi.

Was lying in bed watching a movie and too lazy to move.

Saw a small/harmless spider drop down from a thread on the ceiling obviously heading for the far side of my bed.

Even if it wasn’t venomous I didn’t want to share my bed with it, but also didn’t want to move; not thinking it’d actually do anything I reached out my arm towards it (but still quite a few feet away) and started waving my fingers at it in annoyance.

To my absolute surprise it immediately stopped its descent and actually retracted back up its line while I was sitting there in surprise.

Took me a couple of seconds to realise that my hand must’ve looked like the most giant freaking spider he’d ever seen standing on its back legs and waving the front 5 in the “F*ck off or I’ll wreck you” dance.

2. There’s a feather in your cap.

I was once arrested for “dueling”. That was the charge.

I went after my best friend with a knife and he came at me. The cops pulled up after about 5 minutes. We took off. They caught us. Charged with dueling.

He had f*cked my wife.

1. No one ever noticed.

I started out in the normal math class until my teacher realized I should switch to the advanced class because I got perfect scores on everything.

We were just about to start the chapter about telling time when I made the switch.

The advanced math class already knew how to tell time. I had all digital clocks at my house.

I didn’t actually learn how to tell time til I was about to start high school and thought I should learn

I could read these all day long, y’all.

What’s a story you have that no one ever believes? Share it with us in the comments!

The post People Share Their True Stories That No One Ever Believes appeared first on UberFacts.

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What Do People Think Is Cool but You Think Is Dumb? Here’s How People Responded.

It’s kind of funny to see what trends come and go and which ones stick around.

And if you pay enough attention to trends, you’ll quickly realize that people are into all kinds of DUMB STUFF.

What do you think is stupid that a lot of people think is cool?

Here’s how AskReddit users responded.

1. Stay in school!

“Doing badly in classes and skipping school.

And making fun of smart people.”

2. That’s weird.

“Trying to emulate sociopaths/psychopaths, especially ones from TV/movies/video games.

I knew a guy in college who was wayyyy too into the Joker. He started wearing a purple trenchcoat, mimicked the Joker’s laugh, and even carried knives around, though he never tried to hurt anyone.

I mean I’m all for loving dark characters, but believe me, you’re not them and shouldn’t try to be them.

Also, people who think being rude and obnoxious on purpose makes them interesting.”

3. Tough guy.

“My sister’s fiance is in a 1 percent motorcycle gang, and he loves to talk about how “tough” he is.

Riding his bike through thunderstorms, windstorms, and all the peril he gets in along the way (hitting guardrails, losing control of the bike, etc.)

I just sit there like, that doesn’t make you cool, that makes you stupid.”

4. Not cool.

“People that brag about how “crazy” or “psycho” they can be.

Like, I go from 0-60 in 2 seconds flat, don’t p*ss me off!

Try me b*tch, I’ll pop off!

Go to f*cking therapy…”

5. Not the best idea.

“Really bad face tattoos.

People that get them don’t look cool.

They look like bathroom stalls.”

6. Take that somewhere else.

“Trying to act like Rick Sanchez from Rick and Morty.

Yes, Brian, we all admire your newfound nihilistic worldview, so-called “superior intellect,” and aggressive atheism.

Get out of my face.”

7. The grind.

“Bragging about how many hours you put in at your job and how each day you have to slam an energy drink just to hold your eyes open because you only let yourself get 3 hours of sleep at night.”

8. It’ll catch up with you.

“Excessive drinking (at least with young people).

When you’re young people seem to find being able to drink massive amounts admirable or impressive but the minute middle-age hits it becomes a problem and pitiful.

I really do worry about some people I know who are younger and have massive drinking problems and who don’t seem to be able to see the long-term problems it could cause them.”

9. That’s really stupid.

“Veteran here- I’m willing to bet a pretty significant number of military members/veterans have had some version of the following interaction:

Someone finds out I was in the military and tells me about how they were going to enlist/commission/sign up, but didn’t for whatever reason. Not relevant to this thread, but I don’t care why you didn’t join the military much like I don’t care about other jobs you didn’t apply for.

More than once, I’ve had people say stuff like, “I’d have done really well in the military, but I would have punched the Drill Instructor if they got in my face.”

That comment doesn’t make me think you’re tough, it makes me think you’re a f*cking idiot.”

10. Not a good idea.

“Smoking.

Smoking as made a real 180 in my lifetime. When I was a little kid in the 70s and 80s if you wanted to show how bad*ss a character is you would show them dramatically lighting and smoking a cigarette.

Then sometime around the mid-2000s I almost never saw anyone smoking. And now when I see someone smoking I notice it and think how dumb they are. And vaping? That sh*t will never look cool.”

11. So fake.

“People that “don’t care” about anything.

They care so little, they feel the need to tell people all the time, it is almost like they care what people think but don’t want to seem weak.”

12. Ugh. Gross.

“Posturing in bars.

Bragging about getting in fights in public places.

Threatening/emasculating other dudes over petty stuff.”

13. Gets old really fast.

“Constantly being sarcastic or having an “offensive” sense of humor in order to seem contrarian.”

Now it’s your turn.

What do YOU think is stupid that a lot of people think is really cool?

Talk to us in the comments!

The post What Do People Think Is Cool but You Think Is Dumb? Here’s How People Responded. appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Talk About What Their “Warning Tag” Would be if Humans Had Them

If you’re a big fan of hypothetical things, then we think you’re really going to enjoy what we have in store for you today.

Imagine a world where all human beings had warning tags, like the kind you see on different products.

You know: “High Voltage”, things like that…

What would your warning tag say?

Here’s what AskReddit users had to say about this.

1. The whole package.

“CAUTION: hard to motivate, socially awkward and may come with traumatic memories.”

2. Needs it to survive.

“Do not use without coffee.”

3. Just letting you know.

“Caution: May act rude and not say hello.”

4. Just being honest.

“May be toxic and manipulative without realizing it.”

5. Seriously…

“Not to be taken seriously.

Seriously – don’t take me…”

6. You sound very unusual.

“Will not shut up about opera and samurais.”

7. Get ready for it.

“Warning: This person is somehow both quiet and talkative, and will offend someone.”

8. Don’t mess with me.

“WARNING: Easily annoyed.

So don’t even start.”

9. All over the place.

“Caution: This person can’t focus on one topic and in one sentence there will be at least 5 topic changes.”

10. A real wallflower.

“Warning: Cannot think of anything to add to a conversation but still enjoys listening.”

11. It’s what you’re fluent in.

“Speaks mostly in profanity.”

12. We got a keeper!

“Will spank you once I get comfortable around you.”

13. Barely hanging on.

“Low storage space.

Information may not be saved correctly.”

14. Gotta be careful.

“Warning: Extremely fragile.

Handle with care.”

15. Are you a Gremlin?

“Avoid direct sunlight and don’t feed after midnight.”

16. Broken.

“Emotionally broken.

Will become quickly attached to someone but drop people just as quickly, sometimes “just because” or maybe you blinked at me weird.”

17. I’m a loner.

“Does not play well with others.”

18. Gonna wear you down.

“May cause drowsiness.

Do not engage in conversation while driving or operating heavy machinery.”

19. False advertising.

“WARNING!!

Certain features aren’t as good as advertised!”

20. Keep it coming!

“Super insecure and needs to constantly hear that you love him or care about him or else he goes into super depressed mode.”

What would your warning tag be if you had one?

Tell us all about it in the comments.

We look forward to hearing from you! Thanks!

The post People Talk About What Their “Warning Tag” Would be if Humans Had Them appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Talk About What Their “Warning Tag” Would be if Humans Had Them

If you’re a big fan of hypothetical things, then we think you’re really going to enjoy what we have in store for you today.

Imagine a world where all human beings had warning tags, like the kind you see on different products.

You know: “High Voltage”, things like that…

What would your warning tag say?

Here’s what AskReddit users had to say about this.

1. The whole package.

“CAUTION: hard to motivate, socially awkward and may come with traumatic memories.”

2. Needs it to survive.

“Do not use without coffee.”

3. Just letting you know.

“Caution: May act rude and not say hello.”

4. Just being honest.

“May be toxic and manipulative without realizing it.”

5. Seriously…

“Not to be taken seriously.

Seriously – don’t take me…”

6. You sound very unusual.

“Will not shut up about opera and samurais.”

7. Get ready for it.

“Warning: This person is somehow both quiet and talkative, and will offend someone.”

8. Don’t mess with me.

“WARNING: Easily annoyed.

So don’t even start.”

9. All over the place.

“Caution: This person can’t focus on one topic and in one sentence there will be at least 5 topic changes.”

10. A real wallflower.

“Warning: Cannot think of anything to add to a conversation but still enjoys listening.”

11. It’s what you’re fluent in.

“Speaks mostly in profanity.”

12. We got a keeper!

“Will spank you once I get comfortable around you.”

13. Barely hanging on.

“Low storage space.

Information may not be saved correctly.”

14. Gotta be careful.

“Warning: Extremely fragile.

Handle with care.”

15. Are you a Gremlin?

“Avoid direct sunlight and don’t feed after midnight.”

16. Broken.

“Emotionally broken.

Will become quickly attached to someone but drop people just as quickly, sometimes “just because” or maybe you blinked at me weird.”

17. I’m a loner.

“Does not play well with others.”

18. Gonna wear you down.

“May cause drowsiness.

Do not engage in conversation while driving or operating heavy machinery.”

19. False advertising.

“WARNING!!

Certain features aren’t as good as advertised!”

20. Keep it coming!

“Super insecure and needs to constantly hear that you love him or care about him or else he goes into super depressed mode.”

What would your warning tag be if you had one?

Tell us all about it in the comments.

We look forward to hearing from you! Thanks!

The post People Talk About What Their “Warning Tag” Would be if Humans Had Them appeared first on UberFacts.

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According to Gen Z Folks, These Things Millennials Do Are Not Cool Anymore

Those poor Millennials…

You thought you were so cool for a while, didn’t you?

You were pretty much running the show there for a long time and then BOOM, these young Generation Z people swooped in and stole your thunder.

And not only that, now they’re talking mad trash about Millennials…and they’re making fun of them about the things that they like to do that the Gen Z’ers think are not cool and honestly kind of lame.

And, of course, the younger folks are posting their trash talking online.

Let’s see what kind of shade Generation Z people are throwing at Millennials. Hang on tight!

1. I guess the middle part isn’t cool anymore…

Who knew?!?!

@baileyupchurchmua

Sorry Gen Z, side part FO life! ? #PupPeroniShuffle #GetReadyWithOldSpice #fyp #millenialmom #middlepartchallenge #middlepartbaddie

♬ human – Christina Perri

2. Skinny jeans are officially OUT, people.

Just thought you’d like to know.

@amelie_coleman_

Okay we all had a skinny jeans phase but I love my baggy jeans

♬ This is not my sound – Mikaela

3. You guys need to stop using that emoji, okay?

It’s for the best…

@lesby.onix

???? #laughemoji #millennial #comedy #lgbt #okboomer

♬ brandy running and crying – brandy running and crying

4. Really? Is it time to do that already?

Okay, if you say so…

5. It’s about time, people!

And maybe you shouldn’t brag about that…

6. Guys, it’s time to get it together.

LOOK AT THE CAMERA. We’ve been over this before…

7. Oh, isn’t that adorable?

Well, maybe not so much…

8. I’ve heard about enough of that.

Are you with me on this one?

9. I had no idea!

And here we are…

10. I’m not a fan of that one.

It’s kind of annoying!

11. Can we stop all the wine talk?

It’s gone on for far too long.

12. You know you’ve seen it!

And we all feel the same way about it.

@lexi.borden

pack it up “i can’t survive without coffee”? #millennial #foryou #girlboss #avocadotoast #millennials #fyp #laughingemoji #harrypotter

♬ Sail – AWOLNATION

Have you seen any funny memes, tweets, or videos about people making fun of other generations?

If so, please share them with us in the comments.

Let’s see if you can make us laugh!

The post According to Gen Z Folks, These Things Millennials Do Are Not Cool Anymore appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Talk About What They’d Do if Their Dog Learned How to Talk…and Knew All Their Deep Secrets

Are you ready to get VERY weird?!?!

Imagine this scenario…your dog is basically your therapist and knows all your deep, dark secrets…we’re talking about the REALLY DARK stuff.

And suddenly, they have the ability to talk! Uh oh…this could be bad or it could be good.

So what would you do in this scenario?

Let’s get weird with folks on AskReddit!

1. You need to get over this.

“We could sit down and have a discussion about how claw trimming is NOT the most terrifying thing in the world.

I promise.”

2. Oh, no!

“Rename him “Old Yeller” and take him for the longest short walk of our lives.”

3. Time to party.

“F*ckin celebrate.

My dog is a godd*mn genius dog and she’d be be down for all kinds of mischief.”

4. I will never leave you.

“Explain to him how much I love him and tell him that I’ll never leave him. He has severe separation anxiety.

I’d wanna comfort him and tell him that he’s my world and even though I leave once and a while for work I still love him.”

5. Boring!

“I am so boring.

I would ask it what it has against squirrels and try to persuade it not to bark when my wife is trying to sleep and I’m watching something on my laptop.

The days of my deep secrets were over by the time we got her. *sigh*”

6. Could get dicey.

“My dog loves me a lot.

However, he is absolutely convinced I will abandon him any day. He would probably just complain to everyone else how he carries the relationship and I am just not as invested.

Lots of trash talk, but none of it true and certainly nothing I would worry about. Though he may ne disgusted by my active s*x life and trash that too.

He is a really prudish dog.”

7. Two different stories.

“Depends.

If it’s my old man doggy, I would cry uncontrollably. He’s been having a lot of medical issues and it’s been exhausting and frustrating so I would just want to communicate to him that I love him and that we’re doing everything we can and to please stop pooping at the vet’s office every single time.

If it’s my Great Dane, I’d have an honest to god discussion about him getting into trash cans and begging, as well as explaining that he needs to start being nice to other dogs all the time.

Not just when he feels like it. I’d also ask him why he stopped wanting to sleep in my room.”

8. A real dummy.

“My dog is so stupid, he would tell me all the dumb sh*t he’s planning on doing before he does it.

“Oh I see you accidentally left that candy bar on the counter mom. Don’t worry, I’ll eat that for you.”

The he’ll be all surprised pikachu face when I put it away hahaha. I don’t think he gives a f*ck about telling anyone my secrets. That’s all human nonsense to him.”

9. Best friends.

“My dog loves me, she’s sleeping by my feet while I write this.

Firstly I’d just want to thank her for helping me through a dark phase of my life and prevented me from harming myself. She also has helped me get healthier, I say I take her out for walks but in reality she takes me out for walks.

But I need to also know why she slowly walks under shrubs and bushes and goes into a trance??”

10. Keep him quiet.

“Buy as many dog bones as I could so he wouldn’t talk.

It’s been me and him since I was twenty.

I’m twenty eight now and I have made many mistakes that he has been a witness too.”

11. You know it!

“Crack a few beers, sit down for a few hours and listen to my dog’s story!”

12. It’ll be fine.

“I’m pretty sure she’d keep my secrets. I’m her fifth home in her relatively short life and she’s here to stay. I think we have a pretty good relationship.

Lord knows she hears a lot of privileged health information though. I work on call hospice and tend to talk to myself while doing paperwork. I live alone and pretty sure a regular dog can’t violate HIPPA.

If I explained to her that talking about all the work related stuff she’s overheard meant that I would lose my job and ability to provide chicken jerky, I’m sure she’d keep quiet about that much at least.

Now I love my cats but I think the tomcat would sell me out. It might be an accident though. He’s not the brightest animal I’ve ever met.”

Oh boy…now we want to hear from you.

What would YOU do if you suddenly found out your pooch could talk?

Talk to us in the comments!

The post People Talk About What They’d Do if Their Dog Learned How to Talk…and Knew All Their Deep Secrets appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Shared the Stupidest Rules They Had at Their Schools

I still have a hard time believing that I actually went to school for all those years until I graduated from high school.

The cold, early mornings, the bus rides, the long days, and of course…THE RULES…

There were so many of them! Ugh. I really don’t miss those days at all…

AskReddit talked about the dumbest rules they had at their school. Let’s take a look.

1. Come on!

“If you were involved in a fight, you got suspended. While it sounds reasonable, context didn’t matter.

I got suspended once not for throwing a single punch, kick, whatever. I got suspended because someone knocked the books out of my hand and when I reached down to grab them they punched me in the face.

I got suspended for walking down the hallway and unprovoked getting punched in the face.”

2. Really dumb.

“Can’t wear too many matching shirts because you could be a gang.

This was in regards to a kid with cancer wanting to make a bunch of shirts.”

3. Put on some clothes, mister!

“You got in trouble if you wore just a hanes white t-shirt after school because “you were in your underwear”.”

4. Banned!

“My high school banned t-shirts that had the cover of Rush’s album Signals, an album popular at the time, which features an image of a dog sniffing a fire hydrant.

They considered it scatalogical because the dog was about to pee on it. This struck the entire student body as extremely stupid, and roughly 1/2 of the student body picked a day to wear the t-shirt.

We won.”

5. Bad idea.

“We were all given these ugly planners at the beginning of the school year, with a few pages at the back filled with ‘hall passes’.

If you didn’t have your planner, or if all your boxes were filled, you weren’t allowed to go to the bathroom. And no, you couldn’t buy a new planner. Or borrow one from your friend.

The only excuse you had was if you had a doctor’s note, but no doctor is going to give a note for an upset stomach caused by the school lunch.”

6. What’s going on over there?

“In grade 8, we were banned from standing in circles at recess because of potential scandalous activity going on in the middle.

We stood in squares instead.”

7. Showed them.

“They banned the word snap, since everyone used it instead of sh*t.

So we all just started saying sh*t.

The snap ban lasted about 3 days.”

8. Kind of expensive.

“The $200 blazer was compulsory and we got detention every single day until we got it.”

9. Sounds like a hoot.

“A girl and a boy couldn’t sit together.

The school employed “disciplinarians” to roam around the school and monitor this “activity”.

If found, you will get a reprimand, if found repeating the offence, you get sent to the principal office and if continuing, then eventually escalated to the parents, etc!”

10. Worried about your health.

“Middle School had banned salt and pepper from being used in the cafeteria, claimed it was too unhealthy.

Still sold Mountain Dew in the vending machines .”

11. I don’t think that’s a problem here.

“We couldn’t wear winter clothing (jackets, hats, gloves) in class because they were “gang symbols.”

This was a small farm town in Wisconsin. Besides obviously having no gangs, it was f*cking cold, even indoors, in the winter.

But clearly wearing warm clothing is something only gangs do.”

12. Very erotic.

“Our school banned hugging because it was “erotic.”

As you can imagine, the boys at school started giving each other very sensual high fives for the rest of the year.”

13. Ridiculous.

“No touching the walls.

They restored a building with historic value using, among other things, period appropriate paints. They then opened the planned primary school there and proceeded to try to get children to respect the restoration work.

So we had a few years of benches in the hallways being 10 cm from the wall and children being reprimanded for leaning against the wall before the faculty gave up.”

Do you remember some dumb rules from your school days?

If so, please share them with us in the comments.

Thanks a lot!

The post People Shared the Stupidest Rules They Had at Their Schools appeared first on UberFacts.

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Married? Then These Tweets Are Sure to Make You Laugh!

Until death do us part…

Do you remember when you said that as you stared into your partner’s eyes? And you thought you would live happily ever after?

Well, look at you now…I bet you had no idea that your life would now consist of petty arguments about how to load the dishwasher…you were so naive…

Just kidding! We’re happy for you and I’m sure the whole marriage thing is going swimmingly, but you have to admit that there are a lot of funny and quirky (and sometimes annoying) things about being married.

And these tweets nailed it! Let’s take a look.

1. Yeah, pretty much sums it up.

Give me back my heat!

2. Could this really be happening?

Say it ain’t so!

3. I think he’s right about this.

I’m on his side on this one!

4. I’m right over here!

Wait, did you just say that out loud?

5. This is a classic husband joke.

You really nailed it!

6. Not so fast!

It’s always your fault, dude.

7. You’re right, it’s blowing up!

That’s called “going viral.”

8. Sounds like a blast!

You know this happens to you, too.

9. That didn’t work out so well…

Honey, don’t do that anymore…

10. Proving your point.

And doing it in style!

11. We did this?

Are you sure about that?

12. Always a rude awakening.

Don’t do that again!

How about all of you out there?

Are things in your house a little tense these days or is everything A-OK?

Talk to us in the comments and give us an update!

The post Married? Then These Tweets Are Sure to Make You Laugh! appeared first on UberFacts.