People Talk About the Ordinary Things in Life That They Can’t Do

My younger brother can’t whistle. Not even close.

I know, I know, it’s a sad, sad thing to admit, but he just can’t seem to get the hang of it…after practicing for decades.

Poor guy…we all feel a little bit sorry for him…

What are some normal and ordinary things in life that you just can’t seem to get the hang of?

Here’s how people on AskReddit responded.

1. Me neither!

“Tell left and right in an instant every time.

I get there eventually and sometimes I get there quicker but I don’t feel like I just know the way other people seem to.”

2. Not picking up on it.

“Read facial expressions or detect tone of voice.

I can pick up those things in people I’m very familiar with, but in others, it’s borderline impossible.

It’s a lot easier in anime though, because those exaggerated expressions are pretty easy to read.”

3. That’s kinda hard.

“Finger whistle.

I need to get on the ball.

This 2 year old keeps growing.”

4. Please stop that.

“Sing.

I am completely tone-deaf to any noise coming out of my mouth.

I am so bad, people have actually asked me to stop singing.”

5. That’s weird.

“Cry.

My body stops it before I ever start.”

6. Not a big math person.

“The multiplication table, never learned it.

And yes I have a Bachelors degree in business and economics.

Turns out knowing the multiplication table isn’t that important.”

7. No license to drive.

“In my late 20’s without a driver’s license.

With the cost of a car, car payments, insurance, gas, parking, etc., I don’t really regret anything.

With the pandemic making everything online, I don’t really leave my place at all. This current situation makes me VERY content with not having a license.”

8. Clueless.

“I have no idea how “investments” work.

I work, I have money, I like what it can get me.

But my wife invests, and I have no idea how that sh*t works.”

9. Irrational fear.

“Dive.

I have an irrational, physical fear of going upside down. In college, a guy picked me up and swung me around, just horsing around, like boys do, (or did in the 80’s, ahem) and I blacked out.

No upside down for me. can do headstand in yoga, but no handstand…diving into a pool? nope. Still not.”

10. I’m gonna be sick!

“Wash dirty dishes.

The concept of someone else’s, or even my own dirty wet food on a plate grosses me out to the point of near-vomiting.”

11. High anxiety.

“I can’t call anyone.

I haven’t been to a dentist or eye doctor in years because when I think of calling people, I get incredibly anxious and scared.”

12. You’ve even watched videos.

“I’m honestly really embarrassed to admit it, but I’ve never figured out how to tie my shoes correctly.

I’ve watched videos, read how to articles, but I never seem to be able to get it right. Whenever I did tie them, they were just a standard square knot with a bunch of leftover shoelace so I’d just tuck the leftover lace under my feet to hide it.

The most embarrassing incident was in high school when a girl who we had a mutual liking of each other asked me to tie her shoe in a flirting/joking way. I was nervous because on the one hand she was clearly into me and I didn’t want to be rude and brush her off, but on the other hand I was internally panicking because I literally had no freaking clue how to do it.

So in an attempt to pass it off as a joke, I tied them in the same square knot fashion I did mine and laughed in the hopes that she thought it was a joke, but I think she saw right through that facade and thought I was stupid, so she slowly stopped talking to me after that.

Nowadays I just wear sandals and slip on shoes and nobody really seems to really notice or care, but it’s one of the most basic life skills you’re supposed to learn as a kid that I never did learn and still don’t know even though I’m 21 and seem outwardly intelligent otherwise.”

What’s a normal thing in life that you can’t seem to get the hang of?

Talk to us in the comments!

We look forward to hearing from you!

The post People Talk About the Ordinary Things in Life That They Can’t Do appeared first on UberFacts.

Have You Ever Had a Co-Worker From Hell? Here’s How Folks Responded.

I know my answer!

I used to work with a guy who I’ll call “Jimmy” who was, without a doubt, the biggest scumbag I’ve ever met in my entire life.

He made every day a living Hell and, on top of that, he sucked at his job so he dragged the rest of us down with him.

Ugh, I’m so glad I never have to see that guy ever again as long as I live.

AskReddit users talked about the terrible co-workers they’ve had to deal with.

Let’s take a look.

1. OH MY GOD.

“I had a 50 year old colleague who would message women on sugar baby apps and rub one out over his trousers. Saw him blow his load in the open office. He sat next to me.

Kept on happening, reported it. He said he had a genital rash, but admitted to ‘messaging people on social media’. I got in trouble for my accusations.

Fast forward 8 months, he’s sitting opposite me now. He starts rubbing one out in the open office again. I recorded him. Showed my manager, and he was finally fired.

He was a c*nt, too.”

2. A real monster.

“Blonde monster peaked in high school.

Has been at her job too long, and tries to control everyone.

My job has a high turnover in this one office but they refuse to believe it’s her.”

3. Got a problem?

“She didn’t officially work at my store’s location.

She was supposed to be at another location training to be a manager there, but her predecessor was still working at said location and the upper management/boss didn’t want too many people working there at once. So she had to work at my store’s location instead.

As soon as she started, she had a problem with me. I don’t know why, I’ll never understand why. I suspect my resting b*tch face had something to do with it. She essentially bullied me from the get-go and when I told my manager about it, she claimed nothing could be done since the rude lady wasn’t officially under my manager.

So one day the b*tch started bumping into me and saying “You have a problem with me? Let’s take it outside.” Etc. I was half her size, I’ve never fought in my life outside of sibling squabbles, and I have terrible social anxiety. So I went to the bathroom, called my S/O to come pick me up, grabbed my things, and walked out on my shift. I didn’t say a word to anyone and left her there alone during lunch rush.

I later learned from my friend who also worked there than my manager didn’t blame me, and officially, like on the papers, she said I left for “personal reasons”. She was a nice woman and I don’t blame her for not being able to do anything.

Upper management at this chain was very irresponsible and didn’t seem to care about that store location whatsoever (checks came in late almost every week, we weren’t allowed to have more than two people working in the store at a time, didn’t always have enough budget to order food/supplies, etc)

I’m never working for that man’s chain again. I may work for the same store, but I’m not going to work if it’s one of the locations that asshole owns.”

4. Personal shoppers.

“Girl I worked with when I was a personal shopper. She tried to get me fired a couple of times because she saw I was moving up faster than her.

We both got sent to work at a different location for a couple of months and she went around bad-mouthing me to anyone who would listen, so they thought I was a sh*t employee and she was amazing. I proved myself with my work ethic and they realized she was a liar and it definitely changed their opinion of her.

I ended up going to a different location and when she went back to our original location she continued to say horrid things about me. My co-workers took my side and called her out on her BS. She left not long after on a bad note with them.”

5. B*tching.

“Can’t go home unless I pass over my reports to the next person face to face.

One particular b*tch loves coming in late. Not 5 or 10 minutes late, I’m talking 25 to 30 minutes late.

Best part, she loves b*tching about how everyone is always on her ass for coming in late.

She literally lives 5 minutes walk away from work, so no one knows why she’s always late.”

6. One upper.

“This woman who was one of those people who always had to one up you.

Like if you cut your thumb off, she was just recently sawed in half.

She was constantly complaining and miserable and it was so draining.”

7. Yikes.

“Had a colleague who genuinely enjoyed seeing people not do well and enjoyed when people felt uncomfortable.

She was very manipulative, and is actually quite good at it. She would ask you questions and sympathize with whatever you’ve got going on, only to turn around and tell everyone what you just confessed to her.

After about 2-3 months with the company, if she hasn’t already somehow screwed you over, you’ve heard enough about her to know that if you don’t want the rest of the room to find out, then you don’t tell her.

Yeah, I’m talking about you Carolina.”

8. Get lost!

“She almost got me fired because she wanted to find the weakest looking guy to be her little errand boy.

When I told her politely to go screw herself, she told HR that I had been taking work out of her queue in the system.

It wasn’t a very good lie though, because why would I want to do more work than I have to? I even said this to HR in the disciplinary meeting.”

9. Jeez!

“He was in his 50s, had often uncontrolled diabetes, was 6’4″ tall. I was 24, and a foot shorter.

Normally he was a teddy bear but when his blood sugar got low he would get violent. He tried throwing punches at me for suggesting he get a coke from the vending machine in the hall (good thing he’s slow and clumsy in that state).

When we were in the truck together once, and it started making a weird sound, I wanted to take it into the shop and he insisted we didn’t need to by yelling at me and pounding his fists on the dash, but we were going to a remote area and I didn’t want to have to try and find help if the truck broke down and the radio didn’t work.

I had to call search and rescue on him once because he didn’t come back to the truck after doing a transect (biology job). You guessed it, he had low blood sugar and was not able to find his way back to the truck. He had no education or experience in biology, but he just couldn’t be fired from his job driving a plow. With his propensity to let himself get hypoglycemic, he couldn’t drive either.

So they shuffled him to the wildlife department because he had an interest in wildlife. I was basically his babysitter.”

10. Never forget…

“I’ll never forget the 22ish year old girl who spent hours of one shift telling me, with no prompting at all, about how she used to be a raging heroin addict but she was over it now and had become extremely religious.

She went into very explicit detail about her drug deals and the things she’d done to get drugs. My shy homeschooled *ss was stunned.

The very next day she got fired for stealing 20 dollars from the cash register.”

11. A nightmare.

“I work with a woman who is threatened by other women, especially if they are younger and have more education than her.

She consistently tries to discourage women from furthering their education, and constantly tries to get women she is threatened by fired.

She is a nightmare.”

Have you ever had a really terrible co-worker that made every day at work really suck?

If so, tell us all about them in the comments.

Thanks a lot!

The post Have You Ever Had a Co-Worker From Hell? Here’s How Folks Responded. appeared first on UberFacts.

People Talk About What Actors and Actresses They Thought Were Totally Wrong for Roles They Played

Have you ever been watching a movie and said to yourself, “why was this person cast in this role? What were they thinking?!?!”

It happens all the time!

But I guess there’s bound to be some misfires out there in the world of moviemaking, right?

What actor or actress did you think was totally wrong for a role?

Here’s how AskReddit users responded.

1. Hmmm…

“Everyone in The Last Airbender movie.

specially considering the fact that they took the Waterbenders (canonically the nation with the darkest skin coloring) and made all of them white, then made the Firebenders dark-skinned.”

2. Ouch.

“Steven Seagal as a person who can kick *ss.”

3. No chemistry.

“Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson in the 50 Shades trilogy

Aside from the movies being absolutely sh*tty, the two had no chemistry with each other and it was awkward as hell to watch.

More so when I found out that Jamie was married while filming those movies. The movies shouldn’t have even been made.”

4. Awesome except for him.

“Dane DeHaan – Valerian.

That move is pretty awesome except for him, it felt entirely miscast and I couldn’t believe this guy was the kind of character they were making him out to be.”

5. I can tell…

“The movie hasn’t even come out yet but Kevin Hart is playing Roland in the new Borderlands movie.

I can already tell you right now, it’s gonna be a terrible f*cking time.”

6. Sounds hilarious.

“John Wayne as Genghis Khan (The Conqueror).

That is just wrong on so many levels, I don’t know where to start.”

7. Oh, boy…

“Remember that James Bond movie where Denise Richards plays a nuclear physicist?”

8. Bad idea.

“Is it now the time to talk about Topher Grace as Eddie Brock/Venom?

Who in the ever loving f*ck decided it would be a good idea to cast ERIC FOREMAN as Venom ???”

9. Agreed!

“Cameron Diaz in Gangs of New York.

It’s the only time I’ve really been pulled out of a movie because the casting didn’t seem right.”

10. Mr. Depp.

“Johnny Depp as Grindelwald.

Not because of the whole situation around it, but after reading the books and the cameos in Potter, I just don’t see him as Grindelwald, just as albino Depp.”

11. Blew it.

“Shia Leboeuf in The Crystal Skull.

That part should’ve been Short Round as an adult.”

12. No disrespect, but…

“Why the f*ck was Jessie Eisenberg cast as Lex Luthor of all f*cking things?

All depictions of him are of a tall, bald, and lean businessman.

No disrespect for the actor, I’d take such a high paying job too, but whoever thought of casting him is a clown.”

13. Terrible.

“Kristen Stewart as Snow White in Snow White and the Hunstman.

Terrible.”

14. Wrong choice.

“This might be less obvious but I hate Dwayne Johnson’s portrayal of Hercules.

He has the perfect body for it yes but it doesn’t mean he embodies the character.

I have the perfect body to play Lemony Snickett but doesn’t mean I should.”

15. Hahahaha.

“John Wayne as Genghis Khan in “The Conquerer” might be the worst casting in world history.

He doesn’t even try to hide his accent.

You keep expecting him to say “partner” every 15 seconds.”

Have you ever watched a movie and thought someone was totally wrong for a certain role?

If so, tell us all about it in the comments.

We’d love to hear from you!

The post People Talk About What Actors and Actresses They Thought Were Totally Wrong for Roles They Played appeared first on UberFacts.

Completely Petty Reasons People Refused a Second Date

Dating is hard.

What’s more, relationships are even harder, so if there’s something that really bothers you on a first or second date, it’s probably going to be a dealbreaker eventually, anyway.

Might as well call it off without wasting anyone’s time then – or at least, that’s probably what these 10 people figured when they gave totally petty reasons for refusing a second date.

10. And fast.

All The Words In Every Text He Sent Were Capitalized.

Trust Me, It Got ANNOYING.

9. Five. Months.

He would call me his “beautiful angle”.

He really didn’t know how to spell angel so for 5 months I put up with being an angle.

Also dated a guy who wanted to put a singlewide trailer on his parent’s front lawn and thought I was unreasonable for not wanting to move in with him once he did so.

8. Did they light up, though?

My mom stopped dating a guy because he unfastened and refastened the velcro on his shoes throughout an entire movie.

7. Was she Amy Farrah Fowler?

She would insist on a job interview level of formality whenever we talked.

For those asking for examples, the first time I asked her to my place went like this:

Me: So do you want to take this back to my place?

Her: Is this an invitation for intercourse?

Me: … yes… it is…

Her: Please ask again properly please.

6. Distracting is a nice word for it.

On the first and only date – she chewed her food with her mouth open – it was so distracting I couldn’t bear it.

5. That would be annoying.

He wore a Bluetooth piece in his ear. The constant blue light blinking from the side of his head was too much for me.

Another guy would text “dame” instead of “damn”. It wasn’t a typo either, it was every time.

4. This made me giggle.

She called someone “a pompous”. Nope, she didn’t say he was acting pompous or that he was a pompous ass. He was a pompous.

3. A tragedy for our time.

Not me, but someone refusing to date me because, “it’s weird you don’t have Instagram.”

2. Excuse me, are you Jerry Seinfeld?

Everything was going great, thought she was an amazing girl and we’d been seeing each other for two months. Go to her house for the first time and it was a little messy, but nothing to write home about. Then I go to the bathroom and put up the toilet seat…

I don’t think she’d ever cleaned the bottom of the toilet seat given how disgusting it was. From then on, the only thing I could think about when talking or being with her was that disgusting toilet seat.

1. This cannot be real.

He was wearing a hideous brown fake leather jacket, it was so old that the ‘leather’ had started to flake off and parts were just now canvas.

He kept stopping to look at himself in windows and saying ‘oh god I look so hot today’ ‘I just can’t believe how hot I look’ smoothing down his manky jacket, side eyeing me, expecting me to agree with him.

I left so he could be alone with his jacket.

I’ve gotta say, I don’t hate most of these reasons.

What would you put on this list? Share with us in the comments!

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People Admit the Pettiest Reasons They’ve Refused a Second Date

Dating can be a minefield that requires a bunch of snap decisions to navigate with any satisfaction. We have to say yes or no to people and dates without having a ton of information, many times just based on a gut feeling.

Maybe some of the reasons we use to blow people off seem surface level, but I used to automatically decline anyone who didn’t list a last book they read – who has the time.

These 12 people also had petty reasons for not going on date #2, and they’re going to make me laugh.

12. It worked out, anyway.

She was super hot, but she smelled. I dunno if she didn’t shower or use deodorant, but she just smelled funky. I couldn’t do it. My best girl friend at the time was like, “just tell her”.

How do you tell a girl you’ve known for a few weeks that she smells bad?!?! So I just stopped talking to her. Brilliant.

11. As one should.

She was a volunteer at the Zoo and when kids asked her questions she didn’t know the answer to, she would make something up and lie.

Growing up on zoobooks and Steve Irwin, I take animal facts very seriously.

10. Definitely a red flag.

I went out on a few dates with a guy that I had been really into for months.

I was starting to realize he wasn’t the brightest bulb in the room.

Then one day he said he liked watching commercials on TV and that was that.

9. It seems like a small thing but it’s really not.

He didn’t re-rack his weights. I will never, for the life of me, understand why people don’t return/re-rack their weights.

8. Did he show her one I wonder?

She didn’t know that foxes were real animals.

She thought they were mythical and just in movies.

7. OK this is petty af though.

My new car kept scraping on the bottom while pulling out of their steep driveway to the main road.

After the fourth time of trying to be careful and it still scraped……..

6. It’s just too much.

I went out with someone who has the same name as my cat.

I brought him back to my house and the second I got home I greeted my cat and the guy looked at me and I knew right then and there that I couldn’t do this.

5. I pictured this in my mind and laughed out loud.

Went on a first date to the movies.

This f**king guy…instead of picking up his drink and lifting the straw to his mouth, he would put his hands on his knees, keeping his eyes on the screen, and lean over to the drink and ‘hunt’ for the straw with his face and his mouth contorted sideways trying to land on the straw.

4. This happened on Seinfeld.

Her complete inability to follow the plot of a movie.

“Who’s that?”

“Where’d he come from?”

“Why’d she do that?”

“Who is he again?”

I just couldn’t.

3. I don’t understand.

He stared at me blankly when I said the word “republican” when describing one of my family members.

I followed up and sure enough, he literally had no idea what the word republican meant and didn’t know about our largely two-party system. He was in his late 20’s.

If you’re not into politics, that’s one thing, but he had managed to live nearly three decades in our country without knowing basic information about our political system. My brain could not comprehend and I worried about what other basic information he had managed to avoid was.

‘Twas a hard no on my end.

2. That’s definitely odd.

A guy on a dating app said he wouldn’t date me because I didn’t like oysters.

1. That’s why you pick a fun name for your kid.

A very attractive, fun, smart woman asked me if I wanted to go get ice cream with her.

I turned her down but I guess in a way that she felt was flirty, so she kept asking.

And finally I had to tell her I was turning her down because she had both my mother’s first and last name.

She laughed a lot and agreed we couldn’t date.

I mean, I feel like some of these are fair.

What’s the pettiest reason you’ve ever broken something off? Confessions in the comments!

The post People Admit the Pettiest Reasons They’ve Refused a Second Date appeared first on UberFacts.

This Craftsman Posts Images of Terrible Shutters On #ShudderSunday

I haven’t looked too closely at the houses I drive by every day, at least not when I wasn’t actually looking to buy a new house. It’s not my business, though, and I can see how people who design and build houses for a living wouldn’t be able to look at anything else.

Scott Sidler is a carpenter and craftsman who works on new and renovated homes, and he can’t help but notice all of the terrible ways people apply shutters when he’s out and about on a daily ride. He created #ShudderSunday to share the horror with the rest of us, and I don’t know about you, but I’m here for it.

11. What is even the point of these?

The windows or the shutters, to be honest.

10. All I can see are shutters.

I want to see the house!

9. Are these just all leftovers?

I feel like it’s random pieces.

8. One of these things is not like the other.

Aren’t those windows the same size?

7. I’m feeling dizzy.

Like I stepped into some kind of alternate universe.

6. I think the pigs are cute.

They’re not shutters, though.

5. There is so much wrong here.

I personally can’t stop staring at the window.

4. It seems very random.

I feel like shutters should be an all or nothing proposal.

3. That’s called lattice my friends.

You can’t just make shutters out of any old thing.

2. Doors don’t need shutters.

Say it with me.

1. Neither do garage doors.

But if they DID, these still wouldn’t be long enough.

 

I would never have noticed these, but now I’m not going to be able to unsee it.

What’s something you always notice that no one else does? Tell us down in the comments!

The post This Craftsman Posts Images of Terrible Shutters On #ShudderSunday appeared first on UberFacts.

A Kid’s Poem About Online School Went Viral Because It Is Too Real

It’s been a rough year for most of us in a lot of ways.

But there has been comfort in the fact that we were all going through it together–the staying in doors, the wearing masks, the endless meetings on Zoom.

So when one 7-year-old wrote a poem expressing his dissatisfaction with online schooling, literally everyone on Twitter ecstatically agreed.

The child’s babysitter Julia posted the anti ode online last year and instantly went viral.

Here’s the text…

Boring online school
Today is just another day
in a long line of days
staring at a dumb screen
Just boring boring
online school that’s the
only thing that did happen
it’s the only thing that is
happening that’s the only
thing that will happen

So many people commented their concern about the boy that his baby sitter felt compelled to elaborate that he wasn’t depressed or in danger.

She went on to explain that this was an assignment for school, and I personally loved that she described him as snarky, because it feels like something I would have done in college, rather than first grade.

Many of the more literary minded Twitter users were impressed with the artistic nature of the poem.

I’m guessing they were English majors like I was.

Others took the poem and played with it, putting their own spin on the form, such as this one, which distilled the poem down into one perfect Haiku that encapsulates 2020.

While others cleverly compared it to well known classics:

And still others compared it to funny things other children have done, both in the distant past:

And more recently:

The poem evoked a lot of visceral feelings about life amid the pandemic.

It raised debate over the merits of online schooling and the fact that kids generally feel just as bored sitting in a desk in person.

But as someone who loves working from home, and at the same time despises the endless hours of meetings, I felt this poem in the very depths of my being.

As one user expressed so clearly:

What do you think? Did his poem make you feel seen, or just make you a little bit sad for kids these days?

Let us know in the comments.

The post A Kid’s Poem About Online School Went Viral Because It Is Too Real appeared first on UberFacts.

Teenagers Are Starting to Wish They’d Grown Up “Way Back” in the 1990s

There are some good things about getting older – the confidence, the money, the freedom (sort of) – but there are undoubtedly more than a few things that are less than savory about the aging process.

One of those things is the ability of younger people – teenagers in particular – to make you feel positively ancient without even really trying.

Which is exactly what’s happening on Twitter, where a bunch of Gen Z kids are nostalgic for a simpler time…that was a Millennial’s childhood.

Here are 9 of those posts, so get your dentures and your hair dye ready.

9. I know exactly what they’re talking about.

I’m nostalgic for those vibes, too.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

8. Weirdos are what made the 90s great.

I’m just sayin’.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

7. Literally everything.

Except the internet.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

6. Ouch.

We all have to get there one day, my friend. If you’re lucky.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

5. I mean we had great music.

And all of the flannel shirts.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

4. Keep wishing, kid.

You’ll never be as lucky as we were, though.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

3. It was quite a ride.

Come and sit at my knee, young one.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

2. Some things would be worth going back for.

Lots of stuff is better now, though.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

1. Those were the days.

They have passed us by now, child.

Image Credit: Buzzfeed

I don’t know, I miss the 90s too, so I kind of get it.

What do you miss the most about the 90s? Tell us about it in the comments!

The post Teenagers Are Starting to Wish They’d Grown Up “Way Back” in the 1990s appeared first on UberFacts.

People Who Wanted to Talk Someone Out of a Baby Name

One of the most important responsibilities a new parent has is giving the baby a name. The names we pick are as varied as the human beings who give and receive them, but most of us, I think, realize that it’s something that should require some consideration and thought.

There’s a lot in a name, after all.

Labor and delivery nurses, I imagine, brace themselves when they ask laboring mothers what the baby will be named – mine did it each time and wrote on a white board in the room “Happy Birthday ___!”

There must be names they hate and names they don’t understand, but which choices made them want to actually speak up? Read on to find out!

17. Some people are so focused on themselves.

I knew a woman who named her daughter Sunni. White “new age” sort of woman. I don’t think she realized it, ever.

16. I actually like the name Sunshine.

My boyfriend’s grandmother wanted to name her daughter Sunshine. The midwife said that wasn’t allowed because “it wasn’t a real name” and his grandmother had no other back up baby names.

So, a few minutes later when she heard someone down the hall screaming “Tina”, she named her daughter Tina because she couldn’t think of anything else on the spot.

15. I bet they were grateful.

My classmates mother was a maternity nurse and she has a couple who wanted to name their son “Collin” but wanted to give him a “unique” spelling for it. (I do not understand why parents do this. It doesn’t make a boring name more interesting all it does is set your child up for lifelong inconvenience.)

They spelled it out for her to put on the birth certificate C-O-L-O-N. They tried to name their son colon. As in, the organ attached to your anus.

When my classmates mother explained this to them they were painfully embarrassed and asked her to write it down with the normal spelling instead. I don’t think they’ll ever live it down.

14. A family name.

I once met a dude named Lovey. It was a family name. I think it was especially cute because he was such a big tough guy.

13. Why THAT word?

I tried to tell someone not to name their kid Tarmac. They learned the word from NASCAR.

12. God bless brothers.

My brother talked my mother out of naming me Mulan, because he had a major crush on her and didn’t think a “sack of potatoes” deserved to be given her name.

11. Even the French get it.

In France there used to be a list of names you had to choose from (mostly based on that day’s name saint and 3-4 others). Which is why there were so many Jean / Marc / Louis /Phillipe / Marie / Anne / Valerie, etc in France.

Now it’s a free choice…. but anyone can ask a judge to cancel a name-choice and force the parent(s) to suggest one the judge finds acceptable. So no names like Coca-Cola, Xerox, Cocaine, Anal, Nutella, Sex Fruit, Devil, Blue Murder… PLUS the rejected name gets added to a “banned” list to streamline the rejection in the future.

10. Why, though?

My boyfriend was nearly called Eggbert… But predominantly egg for short. Glad they decided against it!

9. Who decides what’s offensive?

Portugal also has a list of names. It includes multiple spellings of the same name (Eric, éric and Erik are all allowed, even though Eric’s not really a Portuguese name) and names that just aren’t from the Portuguese language (I think they’re there so children of 3rd generation immigrants can have names from their cultures).

However, if at least one of the parents isn’t Portuguese, you’re allowed to name your child anything that’s not offensive

8. No. Stop.

I am neither a nurse or midwife, but I once was paid to design birthday cards for a kid name Mileage (pronounced My Leige, like you would refer to a King).

Both the pronunciation and the spelling made me question why i deal with this customer base.

7. Those are…nothing alike.

My uncle wanted to name his daughter Raider God. I’m glad they settled on Jada.

6. Some of these should not be legal.

I worked at a registrar for a while and among the birth certificates I got some of the standouts i saw were:

Killer, Syphilis and Sweet Prayer Sunrise (this one was a boy).

5. You’ve always gotta wait until the series ends.

As a Family Medicine Resident, I personally delivered two different girls named Khaleesi. This was around 2016, well before season 8.

I imagine there might be some buyer’s remorse on the parents part at this point

4. Talk about a complex.

Boss’s friend named their kid Monster Galileo

Nurse tried to talk them out of it. Called in child services to talk them out of it. They insisted.

Kid goes by Galileo. Honestly, I kind of like the sound of it for an adult or a performer’s name but gah, being a kid named ‘monster’ has to be rough in school.

3. Those poor nurses.

not a nurse, but as a med student a patient wanted to name her child Mudpiles. The nurses silently protested and waited a few days.

Mom changed her mind.

2. Bless her mother.

Before I was born, my dad wanted to name my Sky… But he thought that replacing the y with an I would be cute.

Thank god my mom isn’t stupid or I may have been named Ski.

1. Is it supposed to be…creative?

My mom is a public school librarian and the cringiest name she has encountered so far is a girl named “Lesmie” (pronounced like Leslie but with an M).

I am appalled, y’all, and I honestly didn’t think that was possible anymore.

What’s the most jaw-dropping baby name you’ve heard in person? Share it with us in the comments!

The post People Who Wanted to Talk Someone Out of a Baby Name appeared first on UberFacts.

Baby Names That People Felt Obligated to Protest

What we name our children is a deeply personal decision, whether we want to go for family names, traditional names, something that reflects our beliefs or personalities, or just a name that’s always spoken to us when we think about the humans we will love more than any other.

There are some people, though, who are just woefully misguided about what human beings should be called, and honestly, it’s our sacred duty to try to stop babies from being named horrible, scarring things they will probably never get over.

These 16 people heard what someone was planning to dub a new baby and knew they just had to speak up.

16. Teachers have hard times picking names.

Not in the medical field, but a teacher. There are certain names that each teacher avoids because we’ve had a student (or seven) with that name who were difficult in one way or another.

One year, there were four Dylans in the same cohort and they were all hell on wheels. One of the teachers at that grade level had a baby with his wife that spring, and she named the kid Dylan. The rest of us were like, “didn’t you vehemently veto that?”

He just shrugged and said it was important to her and he wasn’t the superstitious type. Flash forward a few years, I saw a toddler tearing through the salad bar at the grocery store, spilling things, moving spoons from one container to another, reaching in with his hands… it was Dylan.

15. A classic princess fan.

My dad wanted to name me Snövit, the Swedish name for Snow White, but in the end my parents named me something else. Had my younger brother been a girl he’d been named Törnrosa, meaning Thorn Rose and is the Swedish name on Sleeping Beauty.

Never did get to the bottom what my dad’s obsession with princesses was all about.

14. Pregnancy does weird things to your brain.

My mother (who has an odd, to say the least, sense of humor) wanted to name my baby brother Ichabod Rusty.

Our surname is Ford.

She was determined to call him Ichy Rusty Ford. Tickled herself shitless through the pregnancy. And look it was funny, I mean I was 12, but everyone thought she was just being her usual goofy self.

Apparently, she got attached to it and at some point Dad just said “f*ck no, we are not naming the baby that.”

They settled on something much more appropriate…

Although, these days I think the little sh%t might have been better named Ichy Rusty lmfao!

13. Not just Nathan.

I’m neither of these, but I had a classmate in university whose name was Meganathan.

…To date I don’t know why Nathan failed to suffice.

12. Doomed from the start.

I had a coworker named Trina. When she was pregnant, she told me that she and her husband had decided to name the baby Latrine. I had to explain to her that she was naming her poor baby after the hole in the ground that soldiers sh%t into.

She was horrified, and changed it to Katrina. Two days after the kid was born, Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans.

11. When you realize you’ve made a poor choice.

My ex husband didn’t think it was fair that girls could be names “Grace” or “Hope” etc and seriously suggested “Pestilence” “War” or “Plague” for a boy. His choice for a girl was “Tangerine”.

Fortunately we never had any children.

10. Bless that baby’s heart.

Working as an ERT on overnights, I got called to OB to help out alot. One name will always stick with me because of how unfortunate it is for the kid and how ridiculous it all is. The mom was deep in meth and other substance abuse and she told us she wanted him named Zion.

We were like oh cool no problem so we asked her to fill out the paperwork of everything for us to submit and put in the chart and she wrote down Vzyiion…..she looked us dead in the eyes and said, the V is silent…..

She also gave him 5 middle names because she didn’t know which one was the father so he got em all….

9. How is that a compromise?

I work in a music store that offers lessons and rents instruments. We have a list of the oddest child names.

~ Jamuary, Qwest, Sixte, She’Bra, Battle, ShyAnn are just a few on there.

~ The best one was Alivia (pronounced Ah-Lee-Vee-ah). When speaking with the grandmother she said that the mom wanted to name her Olivia but the father hated the name. Dad saw a bottle of Aleve on the counter so he and the mother compromised and came up with Alivia.

8. I’m guessing she wasn’t the first baby. Or the second.

My mother’s name. My grandmother wanted to name her Ishbelle and my grandfather wanted to name her Laura. So they got a baby name book and the first name they agreed on would be her name.

Her name is Wanda.

7. That’s why you don’t ask toddlers for their input.

I once had a student named Linoleum. Some midwife dropped the ball on that one.

My brother wanted to name our soon to be younger brother Corn Peas and our parents almost went with it because they felt bad about asking for his input and then rejecting it.

Fortunately they got over that and passed on the name.

6. Everyone needs a midwife like this.

Back in 2000-2004 I worked at a hospital doing admin and an ol’ battleaxe of a senior midwife stomped over with this angry-looking pregnant teenager in tow.

“Varvara!” Old Battleaxe roared. “Varvara, open up that internetty-thing on your computer!”

Old Battleaxe did not know computers, but she was well scary, so I agreed, and opened up the internetty-thing.

“Show this ridiculous child the first picture that appears when you type in the word Chanterelle!”

The angry pregnant teenager whined about how it was a pretty name and loads of girls were naming their little girl it, and then went stone-dead silent when she saw picture after picture of nasty sulphur-yellow mushrooms sprouting out of muddy forest floors.

“Told you! It’s a f*cking fungus!” Old Battleaxe roared, and stamped off to be Terrifying and Sensible at other pregnant teenagers, leaving me with the angry one.

Turned out that the name she had actually been thinking of was Chardonnay, which is both the name of very expensive wine and the name of a character in a UK soap opera called Footballers Wives, which was about as classy as it sounds.

The baby got that as a middle name later on, which was fine, the first name was Sophie or something along those lines.

5. When you just can’t be bothered?

Not a midwife but lived with a student midwife when I was a student. The first set of twins she delivered got called “Red” and “Blue”

When I worked in a boring admin job dealing with applications from members of the public I came across “Jessica Rabbit”, saw her passport and everything. I just hope she chose that later in life rather than parents landing her with it.

The worst ones I saw in that job were combinations made by women getting married and taking their husbands surnames so can’t really be blamed on the parents.

4. What on earth.

My co-worker went to school with a girl named Fallopia. I feel sorry for her especially when she takes biology classes and they talk about Fallopian tubes.

3. That’s a pretty name, what the heck?

And here my mom was talked out of naming me Violet.

“Sounds like an old lady” they said.

2. She must really have loved that vacuum.

My mom wanted to name me Kirby. After her vacuum.

Thankfully my dad talked her out if it.

1. Definitely something.

I was almost named Cinderall I have no idea what my dad was smoking at the time.

What is wrong with people, y’all???

What’s a baby name you had to protest? Share it with us in the comments!

The post Baby Names That People Felt Obligated to Protest appeared first on UberFacts.