This Guy Plotted for a Whole Year to Spoil “Avengers: Endgame” For a Stranger Who Spoiled “Avengers: Infinity War” For Him

They say revenge is a dish best served cold, and if so, this one was served at absolute zero (for non-nerds, that’s zero on the Kelvin scale, equivalent to –459.67°F).

***WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD***

If you haven’t seen Avengers: Endgame yet, the rest of this post is definitely going to have a bunch of spoilers you don’t want to see yet. Bookmark this post, go watch the movie in theaters, then come back and enjoy this afterward.

Ok, moving on.

Reddit user Jus10Sch lays out the story, but not before labelling his post with the warning we just gave you!!!!

Photo Credit: Reddit/Jus10Sch

And then the fun began…

Photo Credit: Reddit/Jus10Sch

Yeah, you read that right. He messaged this guy for 7 WHOLE MONTHS.

And then, he got the good news he had been waiting for…

Photo Credit: Reddit/Jus10Sch

We don’t ever recommend taking a bunch of pictures in a theatre, but this was revenge!

And yeah, he got Iron Man dying too…

Photo Credit: Reddit/Jus10Sch

His “friend” was serious befuddled…

Photo Credit: Reddit/Jus10Sch

That is stone fucking cold.

A worthy revenge if I’ve ever seen one.

10/10.

The post This Guy Plotted for a Whole Year to Spoil “Avengers: Endgame” For a Stranger Who Spoiled “Avengers: Infinity War” For Him appeared first on UberFacts.

Apparently, “Texas” Means “Crazy” In Norway

The stars at night may be big and bright deep in the heart of Texas, but the Lone Star state is apparently famous for something very different across the pond – people in Norway are now using the word ‘Texas’ as an adjective to describe an atmosphere that’s unpredictable, chaotic, exhilarating, or even scary.

Image Credit: Pixabay

To be clear, they don’t use it to describe a person (yet), but rather a place or situation or a thing.

I mean, I’ve lived in Texas, so I have to say, I think it could also work for people.

Example: Det var helt texas (It (a party?) was completely texas).

Image Credit: Pixabay

According to Texas Monthly, Norwegians have used the slang word for several decades; it’s basically a throwback to Texas’ rough-and-tumble history and all of the associations that go along with the Wild West. There are news articles that use the term to describe everything from truck drivers tackling dangerous routes to a raucous soccer match or a swordfish snagged in a fjord.

I’m really not even sure what my response to this should be, though I would love to know exactly how the expression came to be and evolved in popular use.

Image Credit: Pixabay

And why I’m only hearing about it now.

At least I’ve passed it on to y’all, and that’s what matters. Now, keep it going!

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The Mountain From “Game Of Thrones” Has a Wife, and Their Size Difference is Adorable

Meet Thor Björnsson!

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Hafþór Júlíus Björnsson (@thorbjornsson) on

He’s the 6′ 9″ 425 lbs behemoth who plays The Mountain on ‘Game of Thrones’.

He lives by some simple rules…

1. I haven’t skipped a meal in 10 years.
2. I never miss a workout.
3. I never miss my 6-8 hours of sleep every night.
4. I never stay up late.
5. I never drink alcohol.

AND he’s got a wife!

According to her Insta, she’s 5’2″ and weighs 116 pounds.

You know what’s coming next… because the title told you…

She could literally fit inside of him…

So how does he fit… nevermind…

 

View this post on Instagram

 

Pretty fly! I’m a lucky guy ?

A post shared by Hafþór Júlíus Björnsson (@thorbjornsson) on

They work out at the same gym. His gym mostly.

Unless they’re on the road…

And he can probably do this for an hour at a time…

 

View this post on Instagram

 

Dope shot!! Check out how relaxed Kelsey is!! This is what I call, complete trust 100%!! @kelc33 . @platinumheritage

A post shared by Hafþór Júlíus Björnsson (@thorbjornsson) on

And with two hands… two hours at a time…

There’s a lot of these…

So many….

His head is as big as the camel’s and her head is as big as the camel’s nose…

Okay, I think that’s probably enough.

No, one more…

Turnabout is fair play!

The post The Mountain From “Game Of Thrones” Has a Wife, and Their Size Difference is Adorable appeared first on UberFacts.

This Woman Is Waging a Hilarious War Against Selfies

If you’ve never seen a picture of a person impersonating a cadaver and taking a picture of it, then you’re in luck! STEFDIES is a photo series by an anonymous woman who pretends to be, well, dead in photos.

And there’s a good reason for it!

The STEFDIES series reminds us we will one day die, like our face down figure. Hence seeing her in the photograph wakes up not only the image but us. We are given the opportunity to ‘die before we die’ and really take in the moment in the photo as we must in life. It is not about death, it is about life.

STEFDIES is a constant reminder of how precious life is. The breath inside is what we all ultimately seek.

So that’s fun!

You know what’s more fun? Her pictures!

1. Looks like London?

2. At a petting zoo!

3. A friend joining her for an art show!

4. Okay, that could actually be lethal…

5. Submerged

6. Outside Notre Dame

7. Clowning around!

8. Eiffel corpse!

9. Smashed on the rocks!

10. Under the Golden Gate bridge…

11. In Madrid!

12. At Disney World?

13. Enjoying a snack…

14. Parking lot probs…

15. Along the English countryside…

Check out her website here and Instagram here, and enjoy all that weirdness. You’ve earned it.

The post This Woman Is Waging a Hilarious War Against Selfies appeared first on UberFacts.

14 Firefighter Memes That Will Spark Up Your Laughter

If you save lives for a living, you have to be able to laugh at yourself and your profession.

Yeah, firefighters have that covered, no problem! These memes prove that beyond a shadow of a doubt!

Here are 12 that will spark some smiles!

1. It’s true. 3 days on and 4 days off is no joke!

Photo Credit: The Chive

2. Yes. Agreed. 100%

Photo Credit: The Chive

3. Is there a fire? Okay, be there in a minute. Just gonna eat something first…

Photo Credit: The Chive

4. Sick burn!

Photo Credit: The Chive

5. Classic.

Photo Credit: The Chive

6. She’s a goner. She’s also a mannequin.

Photo Credit: The Chive

7. Behind you!

Photo Credit: The Chive

8. Those helmets are good for something!

Photo Credit: The Chive

9. Well, maybe 20 minutes after…

Photo Credit: The Chive

10. Oh snap!

Photo Credit: The Chive

11. **wink**

Photo Credit: The Chive

12. lol… don’t toy with me!

Photo Credit: The Chive

13. I mustache you a question!

Photo Credit: The Chive

14. Answer: maybe?

Photo Credit: The Chive

Make sure to share these tasty memes with your firefighting friends!

The post 14 Firefighter Memes That Will Spark Up Your Laughter appeared first on UberFacts.

17 of the Toughest “Would You Rather” Questions Ever (with Answers)

This Ask Reddit roundup is going to be slightly different…

How? The Humans of Tumblr staff is actually going to answer ALL of these questions to give you some insight into our twisted minds.

The following answers are still anonymous. I may have answered some of these myself, but you’ll never know which.

Let’s get to it!

1. Would you rather have to sprint every time you use your legs no matter the distance, or have to yell anytime you want to say something?

Sprint every time.

I’d be in amazing shape and people would get used to it.

Nobody would ever get used to me yelling constantly.

2. Would you rather be a strawberry with human thoughts or a human with strawberry thoughts?

Both sound adorable! Who thought of this one?

But… human with strawberry thoughts.

I like being a human and I’d like to know what strawberries think. I don’t think being a strawberry with human thoughts would be that fun. And you wouldn’t be around for very long.

Idk, I’m probably overthinking it?

3. Speak every language fluently or play every instrument perfectly?

I would speak the shit out of those languages!

Tbh, I could care less if I can play any instrument if I can talk with anybody in the world! That would be amazing!

Sign me up!

4. Would you rather fight Mike Tyson once or talk like Mike Tyson for the rest of your life?

Hahaha, wtf? I guess fight him once?

I mean, I’d probably get royally fucked up, but I don’t want to have that lisp for the rest of my life. That’s worth getting pounded on for thirty minutes.

5. Always oral or never oral?

Never oral.

First and obvious reason.. I couldn’t have kids! And, tbh, in my experience… oral is overrated. But maybe that’s just been because of the people I’ve been with?

Idk… are we supposed to be answering questions like this at work? Is this allowed? lol

6. Cat with a human face or dog with human hands?

Wait, I’m confused. Is this me? Or my pet?

I guess if it were a pet… a cat with a human face because a dog with human hands would be trouble.

But if it were me, I’d want those hands. And dogs are cooler to be than cats. I want to be let outside to shit.

7. Cum every time you fart or fart every time you cum?

Cum every time I fart.

I mean, don’t fart that much, but having those feel amazing wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.

And that’s a second secret I’d have if I let a silent, but deadly one loose.

Boom!

8. Would you rather give up access to the internet or give up access to motor vehicles?

So this is all access to all motor vehicles yeah?

Because if that’s the case, I’d still give them up. I can still ride a bike or a skateboard. It’d take me longer, but I’d be in better shape.

I for sure wouldn’t want to give up access to all of the world’s knowledge.

9. Get stuck at all red lights in traffic, or have incredibly slow internet (dial up slow) after dark?

Pfft, red lights for sure.

So what I have to wait another 30 seconds or so? Yeah, it might be frustrating, but there’s no way I’d want to have the internet by slow.

FUCK that.

10. Would you rather be on death row for a crime you didn’t commit, and the most important person in your life is free but they committed the crime… or be free, but the most important person in your life is on death row for a crime you committed?

Easy. I’d roam free.

Because if I’m enough of a psychopath to commit a crime like that, my conscience wouldn’t bother me if somebody else took the fall for it.

11. Kind of a spin-off but my friend once said “If you had to fuck 2 people and their combined age was 28, how old would each one be?”

14 and 14. Super gross, but the least horrible age to pick.

You know what’s just as weird? 14 is the minimum age to get married in 33 states in the United States with parental consent. Yeah….

12. Would you rather have hiccups for the rest of your life or constantly feel like you have to sneeze?

Feel like I have to sneeze.

I feel like I could get used to that, but if I was constantly hiccuping, that’s literally a loop the body goes through and it would drive me insane.

13. Would you rather have tastebuds on your fingertips or smell with your perineum?

No, I’m not going to smell everything with my taint.

Tastebuds on fingertips.

Next!

14. All songs exist but they are all performed by Pitbull, or only one Pitbull song exists but it’s performed by every artist with their own cover interpretation?

I happen to actually like Pitbull, so no judging! But I’d rather have one Pitbull song performed by everybody else. Lots of different ways that could go.

Variety is the spice of life, after all!

15. Would you rather know how you’re going to die or when you’re going to die?

When I’m gonna die.

That way I’d make the most of the time I had left and I’d be able to not worry about dying randomly.

16. Would you rather have everyone twice your age and older talk like an adult from Charlie Brown or everyone half your age and younger talk like a minion?

Kids talk like minions.

First, I don’t need to listen to kids that much. Second, I could get used to the minions language eventually.

17. Would you rather be ugly but smell amazing or be handsome/beautiful but stink?

Ugly but smell amazing.

There’s plenty of “ugly” people who live amazing lives.

And beauty is in the eye of beholder, right? RIGHT?!?!

Thank you staff! Those were certainly enlightening answers!

??????

The post 17 of the Toughest “Would You Rather” Questions Ever (with Answers) appeared first on UberFacts.

15 People Reveal Their Most Embarrassing Moment With a Total Stranger

Oh reddit… you entertain us for hours and hours…

The question was this: What’s the most awkward situation you’ve ever been in with a stranger?

Listen, meeting new people is nothing new, and most of the time we can navigate all of that with relative ease. But what happens when things go south quick and we just can’t fucking even?

12,000+ comments later… we have these gems!

1. Dat ass!

I was at a bar with some friends watching a basketball game, and this guy kept asking me to check out his girlfriend every time she went away.

For example, when she got up to go outside for some air, he stayed in and was like: “Be honest, is that not the best butt you’ve ever seen?”

He did this several times. I felt so uncomfortable, and there’s no nice way of putting it — she wasn’t attractive whatsoever to me.

I’m glad that guy is happy with her, though.

2. Awkward, but necessary…

My boyfriend and I were with another friend and we were walking home from a movie.

We came across a guy sitting in a small patch of grass rocking back and forth. My boyfriend wanted to keep walking, but I felt the need to ask if he was okay. He immediately broke down and said he wanted to end it all. It turned into a really awkward situation because the other two didn’t know what to do.

We ended up sitting with him for a while as he broke down, and we called emergency services because he was apparently very far from home.

He eventually calmed down enough and we drove him to the hospital. He was very thankful once he was there and safe.

I still think about him every time I walk past that patch of grass, I really hope he is okay.

3. “I could be!”

On a trip to Orlando, my husband, son, and I spent some time in the swimming pool at our hotel.

There was a large family enjoying a family reunion at the hotel that week as well. They were a super nice family! We were all kind of hanging out together and our kids were playing.

Well, imagine my surprise when I watched my husband swim into the shallow end and wrap his arms around a woman standing there.

He burst out of the water and said, “Oh, you’re not my wife!” to the 50-something lady.

She said, “I could be!”

He has since had Lasik!

4. What. A. Dick.

A woman at a gas station didn’t know how to put air in her tires, so I helped her.

She called her husband on speaker phone to let him know she found some nice man to help her. Then, I heard him call her an idiot and say that I was only helping her because I wanted to get together with her.

She stammered and tried to explain that nothing was going on between us.

After she got off the phone, she looked at me as if her husband just caught her cheating. No thank you; nothing.

And for some reason, I felt guilty for even helping her out.

5. British things…

Not long ago, I made a short visit to the local supermarket on my usual dog walk.

My dog was tied up outside, and as I was crouched down to unclip him a woman came out of the shop and fell over me.

For a few brief seconds, I was sandwiched between my dog and an old woman.

We’re British though, so everyone looked embarrassed and we both said sorry.

6. Nose rip!

The most awkward moment of my life thus far was with a stranger. I was in a Quebec airport going through customs with my family. Because of some recent changes to their system, they didn’t have everyone in a line, but instead in a large pen where they would release around 50 people at a time.

When my family got to the front, they released us and everyone was running forward in a mass, trying to get to the kiosks. Next to me was a tall Swedish man trying to get his family a kiosk; he was running forward and waving his arm behind him in a “come on” motion, clearly frantic. Well, somehow his middle and pointer fingers went perfectly into my two nose holes.

As he then ripped his arm upwards to motion his family forward, my nose was also ripped forward, and I immediately began bleeding everywhere.

He looked at me in horror, and the customs agents looked at me in bewilderment. The language barriers made the situation all the more awkward!

7. Standing novation

It was my first time voting in a presidential election and my polling place was at a library.

When I got to the front of the line and started filling out the required papers, I mentioned that it was my first time and asked what to do next.

After hearing this, the woman who was working there raised her voice and said “Hey everyone, we’ve got a first-time voter here!”

She started clapping so they would all clap as well.

Nobody clapped, and I was just standing there really embarrassed before quietly saying, “Can I just go vote now?”

8. Pure fear!

One time, I was in a parking lot waiting to get into my friend’s dad’s car.

I saw a car that looked identical to the one I needed to get into, so I got into it.

It turned out, it was not the car I was supposed to be in.

The stranger’s expression of pure fear still pops into my head from time to time.

9. That amused sparkle…

This happened to me in Japan. I was in a clothing store and my wife was shopping.

Being the dutiful husband that I am, I remained silent and stayed out of the way, barely moving a muscle.

A little girl, maybe 4 years old, approached from one side and slipped her hand into mine.

I looked down. She must’ve thought “Wow, this mannequin’s hand is warm.” Then it clicked.

She looked up at me with such a look of terror.

In a flash, she was gone, and I hope she will forever remember with terror the amused sparkle in my eyes.

10. The gas station

When I was a teenager, my friends and I would spend the weekends staying up late playing video games and eating junk food. I was also a cross country runner, and on this particular night, I was experiencing some extreme chafing from a long run I took earlier that day.

While we were at the gas station getting Doritos and energy drinks, I announced to who I thought was my friend, “Man, my pecs really hurt.” Upon realizing it was a complete stranger with whom I had just shared this intimate detail, I simply stared at him and said, “You’re not my friend” and walked away.

I didn’t go back to that gas station for a long time.

11. Tickle, tickle, tickle…

My wife and I went out for a drink one night.

We walked into the bar and I immediately saw someone I knew. I walked up behind him and tickled his sides. It turned out, I didn’t know this person.

He just gave me a weird look and walked away. We got his spot at the bar though.

12. Hey franges!!

I had just pulled into a parking spot at the mall. I saw my friend and his girlfriend pull in a few spaces past mine.

Thinking it would be funny, I snuck up to their car and started slapping their window like a crazy person.

It turned out, it was not them in that car.

I still cringe years later remembering the look of pure terror on that poor girl’s face.

13. Deleted!

I was at a bar with my brother’s old phone.

A random girl asked me if she could use my phone to call her own because she had lost it. She began dialing her number and bam, right there on the screen is her name saved on my phone.

My brother’s contacts must have transferred when I took his phone. Her eyes got real big and she looked up at me with what could only be described as confused fear!

I tried to ask her if she knew my brother, to which she said she did, but she was obviously still weirded out.

She deleted her number from the phone and fled so fast.

14. You’re not my dad!

We were lining up for Disney’s Tower of Terror.

12-year-old me spent the entire lineup desperately trying to catch the attention of a cute guy who was there with his dad. I ended up sitting in the same car as him on the ride.

As the ride started, I grabbed my mom’s hand for support.

Near the end, I realized that my mom was on the other side of me and I’d been holding hands with the cute guy’s dad the entire time.

15. Cheese explosion!

During my first week at college as a freshman, I wandered into the cafeteria, still unsure of how things worked.

I spotted a pizza station and waited in line. I grabbed a slice of pizza with the pizza slice grabber, but the scalding hot pizza slid off and landed face down on the cute girl’s foot behind me.

Sauce and hot cheese explode everywhere up her leg. And since it was the end of summer, she was wearing sandals.

In a panic, I muttered “I’m so sorry,” and ran out of the cafeteria without eating for the rest of the day.

16. “Nevermind me!”

I worked at Old Navy and some lady was looking at men’s shirts.

She stopped me and held up a shirt to me, asking if I thought it would fit her son. I looked around and no one else was there.

We stood in silence for maybe 30 seconds before she started laughing and said, “Oh! Haha, you don’t know my son; he lives in Michigan. Nevermind me! Haha.”

And then she went and bought it.

Those were the cringiest, craziest stories!

What’s yours?

The post 15 People Reveal Their Most Embarrassing Moment With a Total Stranger appeared first on UberFacts.

15 “Game of Thrones” Tumblr Jokes That Are Worthy of The Iron Throne

Was that a tremendous episode on Sunday or what?

All the feels were felt and then many sighs of relief were had.

Folks on Tumblr were watching and they had some thing to say too.

Check it! BTW SPOILERS. Do not scroll past this point if you haven’t seen Season 8, Episode 3!!

1. Lyanna. Is. Legend.

https://captainsamericaa.tumblr.com/post/184517294909/lyanna-mormont-died-doing-what-she-loved-most

2. Snitches get stitches… which oddly applies in this case.

https://nys30.tumblr.com/post/184517700489

3. Sup?

https://izuniias.tumblr.com/post/184518193186/bran-and-the-night-king-during-their-stare-off

4. Perfect reference.

https://ifluffysquirrel.tumblr.com/post/184518164209/actual-dialogue-in-that-fight

5. Ghost? You still here or…

https://oh-no-its-elle.tumblr.com/post/184518297498/not-knowing-if-ghost-really-didnt-make-it-or-if

6. Anybody still alive? Cool.

https://she-wolf-of-highgarden.tumblr.com/post/184517221314/after-this-episode

7. Protect and serve!

https://artoounit.tumblr.com/post/184517455479/brienne-taking-out-wights-to-save-jaime

8. I’ll never look at that silent motherfu**er the same way again…

https://unluckyside.tumblr.com/post/184517741407/the-night-king-walks-like-an-overconfident-frat

9. A girl with no name killed it

https://thewolfnymeria.tumblr.com/post/184517342304/me-arya-when-she-does-anything-ever

10. What makes you think I won’t cut you?

https://elizabthturner.tumblr.com/post/184517382073/lyanna-mormont-getting-up-to-fight-the-undead

11. Get it Arya!

https://queen-sansaofhousestark.tumblr.com/post/184517231134/arya-stark-ladies-and-gentlemen

12. The Hound brings it back!

https://thefandomsinhalor.tumblr.com/post/184517399476/the-hound-fuck-this-im-out-beric-dondarrion

13. 3000 is an Avengers: Endgame reference. Just roll with it.

https://drawntothedarkside.tumblr.com/post/184517784393/theon-greyjoy-i-want-you-to-know-that-you-were-a

14. Pure icon stuff

https://starkofthrones.tumblr.com/post/184517243928/miss-lyanna-killed-the-giant

15. Let them live!

https://hereand-whereyou-are.tumblr.com/post/184518044773/every-time-they-made-it-seem-like-jaime-or-brienne

Next week we get to see Daenerys and Cersei face off?

Finally!!!!!

The post 15 “Game of Thrones” Tumblr Jokes That Are Worthy of The Iron Throne appeared first on UberFacts.

10+ Hilarious Memes That Every Parent Can Relate To

If you’re a parent, or even if you’re not, these memes are relatable AF.

Still, this is for all the parents out there, who tirelessly put up with their kids’ bullshit.

You have our respect.

1. Good life rules…

Photo Credit: Someecards

2. OMFG… you’re going to kill us all…

Photo Credit: Someecards

3. Oh? Yes? What? Who?

Photo Credit: Someecards

4. Come on kid! You need to alert me to these things!

Photo Credit: Someecards

5. Why not?

Photo Credit: Someecards

6. Truer words…

Photo Credit: Someecards

7. Oh realllllllyyyyyyy….

Photo Credit: Someecards

8. They love it.

Photo Credit: Someecards

9. They. Don’t. Care.

Photo Credit: Someecards

10. I’m not frazzled. Who’s frazzled? Not me!

Photo Credit: Someecards

11. Pretty much!

Photo Credit: Someecards

12. Child of the year!

Photo Credit: Someecards

13. See! I’m perfect too!

Photo Credit: Someecards

You know what’s fun? Sharing posts with your mommy and daddy friends.

Because what’s nicer than being tagged in a funny meme?

Answer: nothing.

The post 10+ Hilarious Memes That Every Parent Can Relate To appeared first on UberFacts.

12 Startling Confessions From Dine-And-Dashers

Have you ever dined and dashed? If so, shame on you. Because you do know that what your food cost comes out of the wait staff’s paycheck, right? Yeah, that’s a thing. At least in some cases.

So why do people do it? These 12 people did the deed and some reveal why…

1. Hope your girl didn’t like it too much…

Photo Credit: Whisper

2. Just go up and ask!

Photo Credit: Whisper

3. Oh, there’s a bad part? Poor baby…

Photo Credit: Whisper

4. If somebody is seriously not waiting on you, I can see this…

Photo Credit: Whisper

5. Don’t do it again!

Photo Credit: Whisper

6. Good!

Photo Credit: Whisper

7. Well DUH!

Photo Credit: Whisper

8. Not a good excuse.

Photo Credit: Whisper

9. Get to it!

Photo Credit: Whisper

10. I can’t be angry at foster kids for doing this…

Photo Credit: Whisper

11. Hmmm… something tells me you’re gonna get caught.

Photo Credit: Whisper

12. Haha, ya think? Because you’re a thief? Crazy!

Photo Credit: Whisper

So, have you ever done this? How’d it go? Did you feel guilty AF?

Hope so…

The post 12 Startling Confessions From Dine-And-Dashers appeared first on UberFacts.